Stoic Coffee Break

Does the world seem more divided and angry? Does it feel like it’s hard to trust others in our society? Today I want to talk about how the small things we do can have a bigger impact than you think.

"Kindness is mankind's greatest delight."

— Marcus Aurelius

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Are you aware of how your perspective influences how you see reality? Today I want to talk about how the Stoics teach us that our perspective shapes our reality.“We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are.— Anias Nin

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In this episode I sit down and talk with comedian and comedy writer Ori Halevy. Ori, originally from Israel, is prominent in the large English speaking comedy in Berlin. We had a fun conversation talking about philosophy, comedy, anxiety, and why you need to laugh at life. You can find him on instagram at https://instgram.com/orihalevy_bigoldjew and https://instagram.com/epicomedyberlinA transcript of the audio will be posted on the podcast website at https://stoic.coffee/blog/292-interview-with-ori-halevy/

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Do you think that you have strengths and weaknesses? What if I told you that you don’t? Today I want to talk about how strengths and weaknesses are all a matter of perspective and context."Strive for excellence, not perfection, because we often find excellence in our imperfections." —Harriet Braiker

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Do you think that Stoics are too serious and all business? Do you think that if you adopt Stoic principles that you can’t have fun? Today I want to talk about humor and some of the misconceptions of Stoicism.“It’s better for us to laugh at life than to cry over it.”— Seneca

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This week's episode is an interview with Mark Tuitert, an Olympic gold medalist speed skater and Stoic author. We sat down in his home outside of Amsterdam and had a wonderful conversation about discipline, handling stress, forgiving parents, and about his new book The Stoic Mindset. I hope you enjoy this episode as much as I enjoyed the conversation. You can find out more about Mark Tuitert at https://marktuitert.nl

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“The first rule is to keep an untroubled spirit. The second is to look things in the face and know them for what they are.”— Marcus AureliusAre you new to Stoicism and want to know where to get started in learning about it and how to apply it in your life? Then this episode is for you. One of the things that I appreciate about Stoicism is that it’s very practical philosophy, and there are a lot of ideas and principles that have stood the test of time because they work in helping you live a good life. There are also misconceptions about what stoicism is and what it isn’t so today I’m going to walk you through the basics of what stoicism is, and how you can start applying it in your life immediately.

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This week's episode is an interview with Constantin Morin, from the Unleash Thyself podcast. Constantin and I had a great conversation a couple of weeks ago and he's just a really warm and very insightful guy and I really enjoyed the conversation with him. I really appreciate his insights into developing the type of person that you want to become and getting over those internal blocks that keep you from reaching your full potential. I hope you enjoy this wide ranging conversation.

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"It matters not how a man dies, but how he lives. The act of dying is not of importance, it lasts so short a time." — Samuel JohnsonHow often do you think about your death? Do you go through your life just ignoring it and thinking that it’s always a long way off? Today I want to talk about why considering your death each day can make your life richer, fuller, and happier.

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"Don’t seek for everything to happen as you wish it would, but rather wish that everything happens as it actually will—then your life will flow well."— EpictetusOne of the key aspects of stoicism is to be content with what we have. So how does this balance with ambition? If you are content, does that mean that you shouldn’t be striving to accomplish your goals? Today I want to talk about how stoicism can help you accomplish your goals while still finding contentment in your daily life.

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This week's episode is going to be a little bit different. I've been traveling quite a bit. I am now in Amsterdam. And so I put a post out on social media a couple of weeks ago. I guess about a week or so ago, that I'm going to do a question and answer episode. This is the first time I've done this, but I thought it might be interesting to give it a go. I had some people on social media ask me some questions, I also asked some of my friends for their questions about Stoicism and just kind of about life and philosophy in general, and we'll see how this goes.

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This weeks episode is an interview with Gavan Wilhite. Gavan has been an entrepreneur for over a decade and has had a few successes and a few misses. His most successful exit was when his company AltSpaceVR was purchased by Microsoft. We discuss how to use stoicism in entrepreneurship and person life to manage emotions, take risks and follow your personal principles. I hope you enjoy this interview as much as I enjoyed making it. You can find more information on Gavan at https://wilhite.io

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"Everything is in a state of flux, and nothing remains the same. So be prepared for change, and embrace it as a natural part of life." — Marcus AureliusFar too often we’re focused on the things that change in this world and in our lives. But what are the things that don’t change? Today I want to talk about things we can build on that can help us through the ever flowing tide of changes that happen in our lives.

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“If you are tired, rest. It is not a sign of weakness, but a sign that you have been working hard and need to recharge.” — EpictetusWhat do you think of when you hear the term “self-care”? Do you think of indulgences like triple chocolate ice cream or a bottle of wine? When you think of self-discipline, do you think of depriving yourself of the things you enjoy? Today I want dig a little deeper and think about what self-care really means and why it’s important for us to take time out and pay some attention to ourselves.

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Ryan Bush is the author of Designing the Mind and Become Who You Are. We sat down and had an interesting conversation about a understanding self esteem and the positive case for depression.

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“Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.”— Marcus AureliusCan you hold beliefs that are not true, but are useful? know that I talk a lot on here about trying to get as close to the truth as possible. But are there times when it is useful to believe something even if you’re not sure of it yourself?

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“It is discouraging how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.”— Noel CowardDo you lie? Do you believe that everyone lies? Why are some lies acceptable? Why should we allow people to lie without repercussions? Today I want to talk about the different kinds of lies and deceptions, and what we can do to be a bit more honest, and a little more aware when others are trying to deceive us.

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“Life is a storm that will test you unceasingly. Don’t wait for calm waters that may not arrive. Derive purpose from resilience. Learn to sail the raging sea. — @TheStoicEmperor (twitter)Do you fear the unexpected? Do you stress out when life throws you a curveball? Today I want to talk about how to handle, appreciate, and even look forward to the unexpected events that life brings your way.

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"Patience is power. Patience is not an absence of action; rather it is 'timing' - it waits on the right time to act, for the right principles and in the right way." — Fulton J. SheenAre you a patient person? Do you pay attention in your life or are you just rushing through your day? Today I want to talk about how patience is one of the most important attributes you need to live a full life, and reach your goals.

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"Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the assessment that something else is more important than fear." — Franklin D. RooseveltDo you live in fear? Are there things in your life that you are afraid to try? Today I want to talk about why courage is the foundational virtue of stoicism, and how to develop a courageous mind.

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This weeks episode is a reposting of an episode from Jew-ish. I was interviewed for the show by the host Hannah Gaber about what it's like growing up in guess culture and comparing that to her experience of growing up in an ask culture. Hannah is fun and smart and we had a great conversation. I hope you enjoy it.

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"We must not let the impressions carry us away so that we are not in control of ourselves, but we must receive them in such a way as to be in control of ourselves." — Epictetus Do you know that some problems are simple, while others are complicated, complex, or chaotic? Do you know the difference between them? Today I want to talk about how understanding the different types problems can help you face up to your challenges more effectively.

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“Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.”— Marcus AureliusDo your opinions get in your way? Do your strong opinions cause issues in your relationships? What would happen if you weren’t so attached to your opinions? Today I want to talk about why we should be willing to let go of attachments to our opinions and how doing so can help you live a happier life.

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Do struggle with loneliness? Have the last few years of lockdowns and isolation been hard on you? Today I want to talk about loneliness, why it’s something that shouldn’t be ignored, and why it’s important for us to reach out and connect to others.“We are waves of the same sea, leaves of the same tree, flowers of the same garden.”—Seneca

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Do you give others the benefit of the doubt? When other people disappoint you do you cut them some slack? Today I want to talk about why it’s important to give people some grace, and how it can make you happier with yourself.“Everywhere, at each moment, you have the option: to accept this event with humility; to treat this person as they should be treated; to approach this thought with care, so that nothing irrational creeps in.”—Marcus Aurelius

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Are you stuck in life? Do you feel like you can’t break out of the rut you’re in? Today I want to talk about why we get stuck and offer some ideas of how to get unstuck.“What upsets people is not things themselves, but their judgements about these things.” — Epictetus

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What do you think the purpose of life is? Do you ever wonder why we’re here? Today I want to talk about some ideas of what we’re supposed to do with the one life that we have.“Creativity is a type of learning process where the teacher and pupil are located in the same individual." — Arthur Koestler

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Are you a victim? Do you put yourself in the role of a victim rather than owning up to and taking responsibility for yourself? Today I want to talk about why we fall into the role of victim and how we can step up and be responsible for ourselves.“An ignorant person is inclined to blame others for his own misfortune. To blame oneself is proof of progress. But the wise man never has to blame another or himself.”— Epictetus

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Do you think that life should be all pleasure and no pain? This week I want to talk about the balance between pain and pleasure and why if you want more pleasure, you may have to add more pain to your life.“If one oversteps the bounds of moderation, the greatest pleasures cease to please.”—Epictetus

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Why do you set goals? Why is it important for you to accomplish those goals? Today I want to talk about why we should try to accomplish goals, even we never achieve them.“Show me someone for whom success is less important than the manner in which it is achieved.”— Epictetus

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Are you always looking for the lazy solution? Do you try to find “one and done” solutions to the problems in your life? Today I want to talk about how most progress is not just about knowing what to do, but about doing it consistently.“How do you move forward? One step at a time. How do you lose weight? One kilo at a time. How do you write a book? One page at a time. How do you build a relationship? One day at a time. In a world obsessed with speed, never forget things of real worth and value take time.”— Thibaut

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“It is not so much what happens to you as how you think about what happens.”― EpictetusDo you think of yourself as a “self”? What if we had no part of us that was an enduring self? How would that change how you acted in the world? Today I want to talk about the idea of how we would view the world different if there was no self.

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Desire is a contract that you make with yourself to be unhappy until you get what you want. — Naval RavikantDo you struggle with getting the things that you want in you life? Are you unhappy because you are unable to achieve the success you want in life? Today I want to talk about an idea call the Inverse Law of Desire, and how it may be keeping you from accomplishing your goals in life.

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“There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will.” — EpictetusDo you worry about what others think of you? Does it keep you from doing or saying things that you would like do? Today I want to talk about thinking errors and projection and how we can use stoic ideas to clean up our thinking.

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Do you give up on things because they’re hard? How willing are you to suffer for the things that you truly want in your life? Today I want to talk about how to get what you want, and why it’s important to learn how to suffer well."Suffering becomes beautiful when anyone bears great calamities with cheerfulness, not through insensibility but through greatness of mind." — Seneca

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Do you have enemies? Are there people that you don’t like? Are there people who don’t like you? May there is someone who makes your life more difficult? Today I want to talk about the importance of having people in our lives that challenge us.“There are only two people who can tell you the truth about yourself - an enemy who has lost his temper and a friend who loves you dearly.”— Antisthenes

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How do you handle change? Does it overwhelm you? Do you try to ignore it or do you embrace it? Today I want to talk about understanding change and how we can use stoicism to help us through some rocky times.“Nothing endures but change.”— Heraclitus

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While we wait for life, life passes. —SenecaAre you afraid to take risks? Do you continually play it safe? Are you living a life that is comfortable but unchallenging? Today I want to talk about how we can push ourselves to take more risks and live life more fully.

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Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking.— Marcus AureliusAre you a pessimist? Do you see the glass as half empty? Do you often get depressed when you think about the state of the world? Today I want to talk about how stoicism can help make you an optimist.

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"Anger, if not restrained, is frequently more hurtful to us than the injury that provokes it." — SenecaHow well do you manage your emotions? Do you feel like you’re on top of things or do you feel like you let situations get under your skin? Today I want to talk about a model I came across that can be a useful tool for managing your emotions, and handling situations like a stoic.

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"Think of yourself as dead. You have lived your life. Now take what’s left and live it properly." — Marcus AureliusDoes your past weigh heavy on you? Do you let your past mistakes keep you from making the changes you want in your life? Today I want to talk about how changing our perspective on the past can help us make better choices for the future.

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"No man is free who is not a master of himself." — EpictetusDo you always act the way you want to? Do you struggle to accomplish what you set out to do? Do you find it challenging to make choices that are in line with what you think you want? Today I want to talk about learning to understand why often make choices and do things that don’t line up with that we think we really want.

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“If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.”— Marcus AureliusDo you get overwhelmed with the challenges of life? When life gets too stressful do you shut down and bail out? Today I want to talk about why we let things overwhelm us and what can we do to stay on track.

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A wide ranging conversation with Brian, the host of the LOTS project. You can find out more information about Brian and living off the grid at https://thelotsproject.com/

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We must be willing to let go of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us.— EpictetusWhen life throws you curveballs, how do you handle them? Do you freak out? Do you roll with it? Do you look at it as an opportunity or a disaster? Today I want to about how to keep a perspective on life that helps you keep on moving when things don’t go as planned.

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Do you take care of your body? To you treat it like a temple? Do you exercise it and strengthen it as much as your mind? Today I want to talk about how important it is to treat your body as good as, if not better than your mindIt is necessary to care for the body, not for its own sake, but because it is the abode of the soul.— Musonius Rufus

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Life is full of challenges that can knock you down, but the question is, are you going to stay down? As a romance novelist, Crystal Jackson might seem an odd choice for a guest on a podcast about stoicism, but Crystal has seen her fair share of hard knocks, and has some great lesson to share. We talk about how sometimes, the greatest challenges in our lives are also the greatest teachers.You can find more from Crystal here: https://www.crystaljacksonwriter.com/

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The stoics teach us that our perspective on life is one of the most important things that we can control. It’s our perspective that informs how we approach everything. Today I want to talk about a powerful way to look at the world using stoic principles that can help us become more resilient, and better able to handle stresses in our lives.If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.— Marcus Aurelius

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Last weeks podcast got a quite a few responses and questions. Some of them turned into some back and forth discussions about some of the ideas, so I want to dig into them a little deeper into the question of what do we deserve, and why we should be kind to others, even when they are not kind to us.

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Do you think that life is fair? Do you think it’s unfair? Are others “winning” when you are not? Today I want to talk about how fall into a pretty bad way of thinking that reduces our ability to take responsibility for ourselves, and blame our unhappiness on the world outside of us.Complaining about a problem without posing a solution is called whining.— Teddy Roosevelt

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This weeks episode is an interview I did with Dr. John Chancey of the Knowledge Brews Supreme podcast. It was really fun to dive into all kinds of interesting philosophical topics with John. He's sharp, warm, and fun. I hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoyed chatting with John.

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Your emotions are the slaves to your thoughts, and you are the slave to your emotions.— Elizabeth GilbertAre you afraid of your feelings? Do you avoid, numb, or shut down your emotions? How much stress and anxiety do you create trying to avoid uncomfortable emotions? Today I want to talk about the power of emotions, and how to reduce your suffering by feeling your emotions all the way through.

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If you really want to escape the things that harass you, what you’re needing is not to be in a different place but to be a different person.– SenecaHow would your life be different if you viewed yourself as something you get to create and to become someone you admire? Are you living the life you want to? If you aren’t, how do you create big changes in your life? Today I want to talk about, rather than simply growing and getting better little by little, what if you transformed yourself into something completely different?

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One of the things we talk about a lot in stoicism is that it’s our perspective on something that causes our distress. So how do we change our perspective on things? Are there tools that we can use to help us view things differently? Today I want to talk about some of the things that get in our way of broadening our perspective, and what tools we can use to help change our perspective.We see what we believe rather than what we see.— Alan WattsIt is not the things themselves that disturb people, but their judgments about these things.— Epictetushttps://stoic.coffee

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Be tolerant with others and strict with yourself. —Marcus AureliusHow do you show up in the world? Are you acting the way that you want to? Are you being the person that you want to? If not, why not? In todays episode, I want to talk about how to live with integrity and be the person you want to be.

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Trever Yarrish is the owner and founder of Zeal Software and The Hiive co-working space. He is also a good friend and one of my favorite people to chat with about stoicism. He's an avid student of stoicism and brings many of the stoic principles and ideas into his companies as well as his personal life. We sat down and had a chat about life, work, family, and the importance of having a process for managing your mind and emotions.

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This year has been an especially rough year for many of us. I can honestly say it has been for me. In this episode, I want to talk about what I have learned over the past year, and ask you about the most important things you have learned.The universe is change; our life is what our thoughts make it.— Marcus Aurelius

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Self-confidence is not something that can be given to you. It must be earned, through hard work and determination.— AristotleAre you confident person? Do you have faith in yourself as person? Are you comfortable with who you are? Today I want to talk about how we often will self sabotage ourselves not because we don’t have the skill or capacity to do something, but because we let self doubt creep in and stop us from sharing our gifts and talents.

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Are you a nice person or are you a kind person? Do you know the difference? Today I want to talk about whether it’s better to be nice or kind.Wherever there is a human being, there is an opportunity for a kindness. — SenecaI few weeks ago, I stumbled on a discussion on twitter of all place about the difference between being nice and being kind. It was an idea that I had never really thought about, so today I want to look at this idea from a stoic perspective.

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A cross post of a chat with Tanner Campbell of the Practical Stoicism podcast. Tanner is warm, smart, and interesting, with a great podcast. If you enjoy my work then you'll probably enjoy his podcast as well.

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It may seem difficult at first but everything is difficult at first.— Miyamoto Musashi.Do you want your life to be easy? Do you complain, get stressed out, or upset when challenges come up in your life? Today I want to talk about why we should not only accept adversity in our lives, but learn to embrace it.

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Do you feel like the world is in chaos right now? I know that many of us feel like that. Spend a day on social media and easy to find all kinds of things wrong with the world. Is it that the world is truly more chaotic? Are things really falling apart more so than in the past? Today I want to talk about some of the reasons why some many of us feel like the world is in chaos.The mind that is anxious about future events is miserable. —Seneca

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How often do you take what other people say and do personally? How often do you feel like you have to “fix” someone else’s mood? Today I want to talk about emotional responsibility, and how it can lead a stronger sense of self and keep you from getting pulled into other peoples emotional mayhem.Not to display anger or other emotions. To be free of passion and yet full of love.—Marcus Aurelius

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You have power over your mind — not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.—Marcus AureliusThe stoics teach us that we have control over a few things - our thoughts, our choices, and our actions. In short, our will. So is there a way that we can get better with our thinking, and improve our outcomes? Today I want to talk about a model that can help us be more aware of how our thinking impacts us, and with that awareness, improve our lives.

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Is it ever okay to hate someone as a stoic? Is there ever a time to have “righteous anger”? Today I want to talk about anger, hate and violence in our ever more divisive world.Ignorance leads to fear, fear leads to hate, and hate leads to violence. This is the equation.— Ibn Rushd

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Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field. I’ll meet you there.—RumiHow you ever thought about how often we have judgments in our language? Are you even aware of how often we communicate our our opinions and feelings about others? What if we could remove judgments from our language? Today I want to talk about ways that we can make our language more clear, and increase our ability to communicate non-judgmentally with others.

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Choose not to be harmed — and you won’t feel harmed. Don’t feel harmed — and you haven’t been.” —Marcus AureliusHow often have you been offended by someone? Maybe it was something someone said to you? Maybe they made a comment about your clothes or mocked something that you really liked such as your favorite football team or musician. Maybe it’s one of your siblings who always tries to put you down or get under your skin. Maybe someone on the internet posted a mean comment to a picture you put on social media. In all cases, when we are offended by something because of the thoughts we have about it and what we make it mean.

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How long are you going to wait before you demand the best for yourself? —EpictetusHow often do you find yourself starting something only to notice a few weeks or months later that you let it fall by the wayside? Today I want to talk about why we have trouble keeping commitments to ourselves, and some ideas about how we can get better about keeping those commitments.

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Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth. — Marcus AureliusToday I want to talk about one of the most interesting things about humans, the fact that we cling so dearly to our belief systems in face of contradiction evidence, often to our own detriment.Why do humans resist changing their minds, even in the face of overwhelming evidence? How often have you changed your opinions when presented with new facts? How often have you actually changed your behavior when you learned new information? How often to you rationalize your opinion or simply deny facts because they don’t fit your belief system?

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How much of our lives do we spend living in way to please other people? How much unhappiness do we feel in our lives because we’re not being ourselves? Today I want to talk about why it can be really hard to live authentically."The life of those who live under a mask cannot be happy and without anxiety."― SenecaLink to Neil Gaiman's speech: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=plWexCID-kA

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It does not matter what you bear, but how you bear it. — SenecaDo you think that life just happens to you? That you are simply a pawn in the game of life? Because there are so many things that we don’t have control over in our lives, it can be easy to fall into this kind of mental trap. The problem is that when adopt this kind of thinking, then we have placed an unhelpful filter through which we view everything that happens in our lives.

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When someone is properly grounded in life, they shouldn’t have to look outside themselves for approval. — EpictetusLiving on this planet with other people can be very challenging at times. If you’re like me, sometimes you have a strong difference of opinion with someone, and you end up in an argument and spend a lot of time and energy trying to change the other persons mind. Why do we spend so much time trying to change other people or expecting that other people will change for us?

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You have power over your mind — not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.—Marcus AureliusHaving a clear idea of what we can and can't control is the most fundamental principle of stoicism, and almost every other idea flows from there. This is also one of the easier concepts to understand, but so hard to actually implement.How do you manage to clearly divide what you can and can't control?

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How ridiculous and how strange to be surprised at anything which happens in life. — Marcus AureliusHow often do you complain about the hard things in your life? How often do you find yourself disappointed that things don't turn out the way you think they should? Learning to accept what life sends our way is probably one of the most challenging things to do. But to wish for life to be other than it is, is to deny reality and to miss out on learning what life can teach us.

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Everyone faces up more bravely to a thing for which he has long prepared himself, sufferings, even, being withstood if they have been trained for in advance. Those who are unprepared, on the other hand, are panic-stricken by the most insignificant happenings. —SenecaStoicism is often seen as a tool to avoid emotions, but is this a good idea? How should stoics handle their emotions? In this episode, I respond to criticism in Psychology today that Stoicism is a fad and that it is a dangerous tool that promotes the repression of a emotion.

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When you wake up in the morning, tell yourself: the people I deal with today will be meddling, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous and surly. They are like this because they can't tell good from evil.— Marcus AureliusLast week I talked about accepting yourself for exactly who you are, including all the things you like and more importantly the things you don’t like about yourself. This week I want to talk about accepting others for exactly who they are. Amor Fati is the acceptance and the embracing of your fate, or what life brings your way. We usually think of applying this to just the events and circumstances of life, but have you ever thought of applying this to other people? For me I think of Amor Fati as loving everything in your life, especially those things that you don’t have control over, and one thing we don’t have control of is other people.---Hello friends! Thank you for listening. If this podcast speaks to you, please consider give a donation on Patreon at https://patreon.com/stoiccoffeeYou can also find more episodes at our website, https://stoic.coffee, and pick up some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop at https://stoic.coffee/shop.Lastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it.Thanks again for listening.

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One of the hardest things for us to do, though it is one of the most important things we will ever learn, is to accept ourselves for exactly who we are. But when you decide to take this on and make it a priority, it can be one of the most life changing thing you can do."It never ceases to amaze me: we all love ourselves more than other people, but care more about their opinion than our own." — Marcus Aurelius---Hello friends! Thank you for listening. If this podcast speaks to you, please consider give a donation on Patreon at https://patreon.com/stoiccoffeeYou can also find more episodes at our website, https://stoic.coffee, and pick up some great looking shirts and hoodies at the Stoic Coffee Shop at https://stoic.coffee/shop.Lastly if you know of someone that would benefit from or appreciate this podcast, please share it.Thanks again for listening.

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An interview with Donald J. Robertson about his new graphic novel about Marcus Aurelius called Verissimus. We talk about all kinds of stoic history and the politics of his day.

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Forget everything else. Keep hold of this alone and remember it: Each of us lives only now, this brief instant. —Marcus AureliusDon’t let fear, low self-esteem and the negative voices hold you back from your true destiny. —David GogginsOne of the hardest things for me, and I’m sure that many of you fall into the same category, is to know what you want and have the courage to go after it. There are plenty of reason why this happens, and for the most part it comes down to fear, and the two biggest are fear of failure, and fear of disapproval of others. Today I want to talk about some changes I’m making in my life, and how I’m facing these fears.

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“When force of circumstance upsets your equanimity, lose no time in recovering your self-control, and do not remain out of tune longer than you can help. Habitual recurrence to the harmony will increase your mastery of it.”― Marcus AureliusOver the past few weeks, I've been thinking a lot about equanimity and how it may be the most important idea that the stoics came up with. And the more I look into it, the more I see that this is the one of the most important principles, and a foundation for being able to apply the other principles more effectively. We can also see how important this is in other traditions, such as Buddhism, especially Zen Buddhism, also promotes the idea of calming the mind as one of the highest virtues.

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Don’t explain your philosophy. Embody it. — EpictetusEvents in life mean nothing if you do not reflect on them in a deep way, and ideas from books are pointless if they have no application to life as you live it. — Robert GreeneThe hardest thing about any philosophy is being able to apply what you learn in real life. We can read all the books, watch all the videos, follow all the gurus, but until we actually apply what we've learned, all of that learning is worthless.

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Everyone faces up more bravely to a thing for which he has long prepared himself, sufferings, even, being withstood if they have been trained for in advance. Those who are unprepared, on the other hand, are panic-stricken by the most insignificant happenings. — SenecaWhen you're in the midst of a challenge it's really hard to think clearly. It's hard sometimes to remember that this moment is just this moment and will not be forever. In this episode, I’m going to talk about how thinking longer term can help smooth out the day to day rough patches and help you stay more resilient.

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Anxieties can only come from your internal judgement.— Marcus AureliusWe all have things in our lives that seems to stop us from completing things that we really want to do. Often, these things aren’t even all that big but end up being show stoppers nonetheless. Today I want to talk about why it’s important to pay attention to the things that get in your way, and some possible ways to get around them.

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“To be always fortunate, and to pass through life with a soul that has never known sorrow, is to be ignorant of one half of nature.”― SenecaLife is never meant to be kittens and rainbows. A good portion of our life is going to sadness, disappointment, and failure. In this episode, I want to talk about how being too positive can actually be bad for you. 

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Brief is man’s life and small the nook of the Earth where he lives; brief, too, is the longest posthumous fame, buoyed only by a succession of poor human beings who will very soon die and who know little of themselves, much less of someone who died long ago.—Marcus Aurelius

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One cannot pursue one’s own highest good without at the same time necessarily promoting the good of others. A life based on narrow self-interest cannot be esteemed by any honorable measurement. Seeking the very best in ourselves means actively caring for the welfare of other human beings. Our human contract is not with the few people with whom our affairs are most immediately intertwined, nor to the prominent, rich, or well educated, but to all our human brethren.— EpictetusWhat kind of privileges have you had in your life? Do you recognize the advantages that you have enjoyed? In this episode I want to talk about privilege, and how the stoics encourage us to use the privliges we have to improve society.

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It never ceases to amaze me: we all love ourselves more than other people, but care more about their opinion than our own.– Marcus AureliusAre you afraid to tell others what you really think or how you really feel? In this episode I want to talk about the idea of radical candor, and how committing to being honest about what you think and feel is one of the most challenging but rewarding things you can do.

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Don’t demand or expect that events happen as you would wish them to. Accept events as they actually happen. That way peace is possible. — EpictetusWhat if you stopped resisting what life brought your way? What if you could cheerfully accept everything that came your way? How would that change the way you showed up in the world? This week I want to talk about the importance of dealing with what is, and not what we think it should be.

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The greater the difficulty, the more glory in surmounting it. Skillful pilots gain their reputation from storms and tempests. — EpictetusDo you think that life is meant to be comfortable? Do you make choices in your life to take the easy path and avoid discomfort? If so, then you may not be living a life as full as you could. 

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Some things are within our power, while others are not. Within our power are opinion, motivation, desire, aversion, and, in a word, whatever is of our own doing; not within our power are our body, our property, reputation, office, and, in a word, whatever is not of our own doing.— EpictetusOne topic that I revisit on the podcast repeatedly is how important it is to control the things that we can’ and let go of the things that we can’t. For me, this is one of the most important lessons we can learn in our lives. In this episode, I want to talk about how we be more mindful of what we can, and what we cannot control.

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If change is forced upon you, you must resist the temptation to overreact or feel sorry for yourself. — Robert GreeneHow often do you feel that life is unfair? That something happened that you think should not have happened to you? Maybe someone hurt you and you want them to fix it? In this episode I want to talk about blame and responsibility.

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It is wrong always, everywhere, and for anyone, to believe anything upon insufficient evidence.— William K. Clifford, Ethics of BeliefWe all like to think that we are wise, that our opinions are well thought out, and that we’re smart enough to spot when we have inconsistent beliefs. Today I want to talk about why believing something without sufficient evidence is wrong, and that idea that how we come to a belief or a conclusion is more important that the whether the belief or conclusion is correct.

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“While we wait for life, life passes.”— SenecaTime is the most important, the most in demand resource that we have in life. Are you spending yours wisely or do you let it go to waste? Today I want to talk about time, and how we can take some steps to be mindful of how we spend it.

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“You may leave this life at any moment: have this possibility in your mind in all that you do or say or think.”— Marcus AureliusDo you think about death? Are you afraid of death? Do you take the time to think about what the world will be like when you are no longer here? Today I want to talk about why death is so important, and how when we avoid thinking about death, we are missing out on one of the best tools to live a fulfilling life.

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“The responsibility is all yours. No one can stop you from being honest or straightforward.”— Marcus AureliusTo you own your actions? Do you graciously accept the consequences of your choices? When you make a mistake do you try to cover it up? Today I want to talk about the idea that to have more control over your life, you need to accept responsibility for everything you do.

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“Objective judgment, at this very moment. Unselfish action, now at this very moment. Willing acceptance – now at this very moment – of all external events. That’s all you need.” — Marcus AureliusHow aware are you of what you are thinking? What you are feeling? Most of us like to think that we are pretty aware of what’s going on in our minds or what emotion is currently driving us. I mean, we’re the one inside of our mind, so we should know what we’re thinking or feeling, right? Well, not always. Often, the thoughts and emotions inside my head are busy, confusing, conflicting, and overwhelming. So today we’re going to talk about the most important mental skill you can develop, awareness.

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“Everything, a horse, a vine, is created for some duty. For what task, then, were you yourself created? A person’s true delight is to do the things they were made for.”—Marcus AureliusDo you really know what you want? When you think about what you want, does it excite you? Does it scare you? Are you pursuing what you want? In today’s episode, we’re going to talk about why it’s scary to know what you want, and why that’s a good thing.

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“Now is the time to get serious about living your ideals. How long can you afford to put off who you really want to be? Your nobler self cannot wait any longer. Put your principles into practice–now. Stop the excuses and the procrastination. This is your life! […] Decide to be extraordinary and do what you need to do–now.” — EpictetusWe all have events and challenges that happen in our lives. That what life is all about. When the stoics use the term Amor Fati, what they mean is to love your fate, to love and accept what life sends your way. How you feel about the events that happen to you in your life will not change if they are going to happen or not. They will happen. What thoughts you have around these events, how you feel about them, and how you respond to them are the only things that you have control over. If this is the case, why do we make excuses? Why do we come up with rationalizations about these how we do or don’t, especially when the rationalizations just make us feel worse about the actions we want to take anyway?

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It is possible to curb your arrogance, to overcome pleasure and pain, to rise above your ambition, and to not be angry with stupid and ungrateful people — yes, even to care for them. — Marcus AureliusHow do you win an argument? All of us have to deal with conflict in our lives. To think otherwise is completely unrealistic. But when we have an argument, what is our goal? What do we hope to achieve? To change the other person’s mind? To prove that we are right? Today I want to talk about why we argue, and the best way to win an argument.

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