Bury Me In NJ

This week, I’ll be sharing my interview with Laura Smothers-Chu, CEO & Founder ofBefriended Heart, who speaks candidly about her fertility journey. 

During our conversation, which was recorded in October during National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, we explore the various situations she and her husband have navigated in their desire to become parents, including numerous invasive procedures and miscarriage, and the subsequent grief that followed. We discuss how the perceptions (and misconceptions) surrounding pregnancy can contribute to challenges that individuals face when trying to conceive. 

Bury Me in New Jersey is recorded in Hammonton, NJ, and is produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Our theme music is P to the A, by Anonymous Novels. Check out their page on SoundCloud to hear more of their work.

This week, I’ll be sharing my interview with my long-time friend, Joyce DeStasio. During our conversation, she shares her experience giving birth to her baby girl, Alaina, at 27 weeks, and the subsequent 104 days Alaina spent in the NICU before passing away the following February.

Joyce shares how her initial documentation of her daughter’s medical care soon evolved into writing about her experience from a more personal point of view, and later enrolled in a memoir class to further develop these writings. Beyond her own personal creative expression, we talk at length about the ways that she and Alaina's father used music as a cathartic outlet during the time she was hospitalized and after she passed.

Bury Me in New Jersey is recorded in Hammonton, NJ, and is produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Our theme music is P to the A, by Anonymous Novels. Check out their page on SoundCloud to hear more of their work.

Visit  burymeinnj.com to learn about ways you can support the show. 

This week, I’ll be sharing my interview with Jillian Ryan, my long-time friend, and fellow S. Jerseyean where we discuss her experience with losing her daughter, Isabelle, during her 8th month of pregnancy. During this discussion, Jill talks about how she handled her grief in the weeks and months immediately following the loss of her daughter; how the experience has shaped her as a mother; and the ways she’s dealt with her loss in the subsequent years since losing Izzy. 

Although we’ve been planning this conversation for the past several months, the timing worked for our interview to align with National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month, which is in October, and Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day, October 15th.

Please note that in addition to discussing stillbirth, we also briefly discuss miscarriage.

Bury Me in New Jersey is recorded in Hammonton, NJ, and is produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Our theme music is P to the A, by Anonymous Novels.

This week's episode features Effie Anolik, founder of Afterword, an online funeral planning service offering virtual and in-person memorials, as well as a combination of the two. Effie garnered inspiration for Afterword after experiencing the sudden loss of her own father, and realizing that the funeral industry offered no convenient ways to funeral plan online. Using her extensive background in eCommerce as her guide, Effie mapped out a way for families to experience personalized funeral planning from the comfort of their homes.

Although this interview was recorded last November, the topics still felt relevant and insightful to share, especially as Effie helped me think about grief from a different perspective than my usual emotions-first approach.  This conversation has also led to a nearly year-long exchange as different songs come to mind that relate to grief. While Effie initially notes she doesn’t really have any “grief songs,” as you’ll hear in our interview, she shared the song that we used for this week’s episode title, “In Case You Don’t Live Forever,” by Ben Platt during one of these follow-up discussions. 

Bury Me in New Jersey is recorded in Hammonton, NJ, and is produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Our theme music is P to the A, by Anonymous Novels. Check out their page on SoundCloud to hear more of their work. 

This week, we're sharing our conversation with Lori LoCicero and Lisa Pahl, creators of The Death Deck, a game and conversation tool consisting of 112 cards, allowing friends and family to share thoughts, stories, and preferences about life and death in a relaxed way.

Lori and Lisa first met when Lori’s husband, Joe, was on hospice and Lisa was their hospice nurse. The two felt an immediate connection during that time, and after Joe’s passing, their healing sessions continued for more than 2 years, exceeding the typical timeframe of hospice aftercare. 

Beyond working through Lori’s own grief, their conversations grew to include their frustrations about how death was viewed as a “taboo” topic in our culture and how important it is to not only have these conversations but to have them early. From these discussions, the idea for The Death Deck was born. 

 For anyone who might be interested in checking this out for themselves, Lori and Lisa have been kind enough to offer $5 off your purchase of the game when you buy through their website, www.thedeathdeck.com, when you use the code BuryMe5, now until October 31st. 

Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Theme music: "P to the A" by Anonymous Novels. 

For our Season 4 release, we spoke with Emma Payne, founder and CEO of Grief Coach, a text message-based platform that provides personalized grief support to the bereaved and people in their inner circle throughout the year.
 
During our conversation, we discuss the personal experiences that drew Emma to developing this service, the difficulties many grieving individuals face after a loved one dies, and how Grief Coach helps to provide tools to make it easier for these people and their loved ones to navigate this space. Be sure to listen ‘til the end of our episode, since we’ll be sharing a special discount code to give the first 50 listeners who sign up $20 off a full year subscription!

 Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Theme music is P to the A, by Anonymous Novels.

In our final episode for this season, we speak with Penny Smtih, a hospice nurse who's gained a viral following on TikTok for helping to normalize conversations about death and dying. During our conversation, we talk about what led her to pursue work as a hospice nurse, the ways helps people navigate their death experiences, and what inspired her to share her stories through social media.

Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Theme music: "P to the A," by Anonymous Novels. Season 3 is brought to you in part by Keeper (mykeeper.com), which offers online tribute pages and virtual memorial services. 

This week we speak with Co-Founder & CEO of GatheringUs, Noha Waibsnaider. Based on her own experiences of organizing memorials and funerals as part of a large family, Noha was determined to help other families honor their loved ones in a way that was easy and convenient. With the onset of COVID-19, and the global travel restrictions set in its wake, the need for alternative and virtual gathering options in times of mourning is even more essential. 

During our conversation, we discuss the initial inspiration behind GatheringUs, the way that the platform has grown and evolved to meet clients' needs, and the lessons Noha has learned while helping grieving families during such unprecedented times.

Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Theme music: "P to the A" by Anonymous Novels. Season 3 is brought to you in part by Keeper (mykeeper.com), which offers online tribute pages and virtual memorial services. 

Today's conversation is with pioneer and established thought-leader of pet death care, Coleen A. Ellis. She uses her decades of experience to assist those mourning the loss of a beloved animal companion and bring much-needed continuing education to the veterinary industry to help better guide clients through the loss of a pet.

Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Theme music "P to the A" by Anonymous Novels. Season 3 is brought to you in part by Keeper (mykeeper.com), which offers online tribute pages and virtual memorial services.

Today's episode features UK-based cartoonist and illustrator Gary Andrews (@garyscribbler). While a daily doodle was a way for him to record the general happenings of life, the project took on new meaning after the sudden passing of his wife, Joy. 
Through this project, Gary chronicled his grief journey, providing insights into the pain,  reflections, and perseverance that he and his two young children experienced  in the days, weeks, months, and years since Joy's death. A collection of these illustrations are now available in the book, Finding Joy.  

Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Theme music: "P to the A" by Anonymous Novels. 

Special thanks to our season-long sponser, Keeper (mykeeper.com).

This week’s episode features End-of-Life Guide, Naomi Edmonson who was first drawn to death work after a close mother figure’s battle with, and subsequent passing from, cancer. 

Upon the sudden passing of her own mother, Naomi found herself using the tools she learned about to navigate through her own unexpected grief journey while also creating a space for others to freely express their grief experiences through her Instagram account, @theglorioushum, and her website, glorioushum.com.

Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Theme music: "P to the A" by Anonymous Novels. 

Special thanks to today's show sponsors, AFTR (after.live) and Keeper (mykeeper.com).

In this episode of the show, we speak with Steve Reiter, founder & president of the NEVER Alone Project. His organization is dedicated to helping pass legislation to change recently implemented visitor restrictions due to COVID-19. This initiative was started after his wife, Elizabeth, died alone in a Colorado hospital. 

Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Theme music, "P to the A" by Anonymous Novels. 

The first episode of our third season features Installation Artist Casey Middaugh who explores ways to sonically acknowledge the unspoken work associated with grief in her piece, For Whom the Bell Toils. We discuss the personal experiences she had with grief that inspired this project, the stories and lessons she's gathered from others who've interacted with her piece, and the other ways she's promoted death conversations and positivity through her work.

Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Theme music, "P to the A" by Anonymous Novels. 

Bury Me in New Jersey is back at it offering you conversations focused on grief, death, love, and everything in between. Season 3 will be launching next Tuesday, 11/24 , featuring different guests sharing their personal and professional points of view.  You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll learn all about the beauty of an Advanced Directive Disco! 

You can find us on all major podcasting platforms or by visiting www.burymeinnj.com

Our final episode of Season 2 finishes with a very raw and honest conversation with my good friend Elizabeth Grace Wolf, as we both share the ways we’ve both evolved in grief as we’ve dealt with our parents’ Alzheimer’s diagnosis--for me, my mother, and for her, both parents, just six months apart.

During our conversation, Elizabeth and I talk about the ways that we’ve evolved with our grief experiences, how they’ve driven the direction we’ve taken in our lives, and the way that love--and joy--prevails despite profound pain.

Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Theme music: "P to the A" by Anonymous Novels.

This week's episode features hospice nurse and clinical manager at Hospice of the Chesapeake, Monica Hastings. During our conversation, Monica explains the services that hospice offers patients and families towards the end of life, the misconceptions/fear surrounding this field, and how working in death work has totally changed her outlook on life.

Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Theme music: "P to the A" by Anonymous Novels.

My guest today is Diana Muñiz, a chaplain at Lyndon B. Johnson Hospital and for Accredited Hospices of America, both in Houston, Texas. During our conversation, we discuss the experiences she's had as a chaplain, her current studies with The Institute for the Study of Birth, Breath, and Death, and some of the more sacred--and taboo--aspects of caregiving.

Please be aware that this episode contains profanity.

Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Theme music: "P to the A" by Anonymous Novels.

In this week's episode, we'll be speaking with author Heather Quinlan, who explores both the changing and persistent attitudes about death and illness as it relates to widespread plague and pandemics in her upcoming book, “Plagues, Pandemics, and Viruses, from the Plague of Athens to COVID-19.”

In addition to discussing the learnings she took away from the extensive research she did for her book, we talk about the lessons Heather’s learned from her personal experiences with death and loss, our shared experiences with Alzheimer’s disease, and the New Jersey burial she’s been dreaming of for her father.

Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Theme music: "P to the A" by Anonymous Novels.

In today's episode, we speak with hospital chaplain and author Joan Paddock Maxwell who's worked with hundreds of patients with life-threatening illnesses, and was with many of them when they died.

We discuss the calling that brought her to this work, the lessons she's learned from her experiences, and the stories that led her to write her book, Soul Support: Spiritual Encounters at Life's End: Memoir of a Hospital Chaplain.

Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Theme music: "P to the A" by Anonymous Novels. 

Our second season opens with a conversation with Heather Paul, who is the assistant director of the Springboard Fellowship for Hillel International and the assistant director of the Milton Marks Neuro-Oncology Family Camp. During our conversation, we talk about the many ways she’s worked in the grief space, which most recently includes her work on creating Virtual Memory Circles, and her current enrollment in rabbinical school. 

Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Theme music: "P to the A" by Anonymous Novels. 

We're off this week, but here's a quick update on what we've got going on and what to expect for next season, which rolls out next Tuesday, August 25th. Learn about how you can support the show, some bonus content we've got going on, and what to expect to hear starting next week! 

We close out the first season of Bury Me in New Jersey with Taryn Schulke, a Grief and Bereavement Specialist at Texas Children's Hospital in Houston, TX. During our conversation, Taryn explains the work she does to offer support in first moments, weeks, months, and sometimes years after a patient's death. 

Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Theme music: "P to the A" by Anonymous Novels

In this episode of the show, palliative care social worker Claire Crawford discusses the personal experiences that led her to pursue a career in medicine, the unexpected way she ended up in pediatric palliative care, and how she's learned that profound grief can only be experienced after experiencing profound love. 

Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. Theme music: "P to the A" by Anonymous Novels

What's it like to help families and individuals navigate incredibly difficult healthcare decisions they never dreamed they'd have to make, especially when the patient is a child? 

Palliative Care Social Worker Shannon Barnes explains the ways she and her team at Texas Children's Hospital provide support to patients and their families; the appropriate time to introduce their services into a patient's care plan (spoiler alert: it's not at end of life); and how she uses music as a therapeutic release when dealing with her own grief. 

Produced by Nick Rumacyzk. Theme music: "P to the A" by Anonymous Novels.

This week's episode kicks off our series of interviews with members of the palliative care team at Texas Children's Hospital in Houston, TX. The conversation starts with Dr. Jared Rubenstein, a pediatric palliative care physician. 
During this discussion, Rubenstein explains what palliative care is; how he and his team introduce palliative care to families and colleagues; and ways he's found to handle misconceptions and negative perceptions surrounding this work. 

Produced by Nick Rumacyzk. Theme Music, "P to the A," by Anonymous Novels. 

In our premiere episode of Bury Me In New Jersey, host Sara Wuillermin kicks off the show by being interviewed by Book Apart CEO and Leadership Coach Katel LeDu. In addition to Sara explaining what led her to pursue this project, Katel shares her own experience with grief. 

Produced by Nick Rumaczyk. 
Theme Music, "P to the A" by Anonymous Novels.

BuryMeInNJ.com is excited to announce the premiere of its podcast, launching July 14, 2020! This show is about grief, death, dying, love, and everything in between.

In our first season, we'll be speaking with members of the palliative care team at the Texas Children's Hospital in Houston, TX. Check out our teaser for a taste of what to expect in upcoming episodes and check back on July 14th for our first full show.

Visit www.burymeinnj.com to learn more