Filtrer par genre
- 31 - Eliminate the Fake Desires Caused by P*rnBrain
https://quitbyhealing.com/links/ ☝️ this is the link for the QuitByHealing Community, all the free courses I mentioned in the episode and for the 21 day QuitByHealing Program. When you use p*rn a lot, one of the consequences is that it changes and warps your desires. It's common for addicts to end up watching content that isn't even aligned with their true desires or even true sexual orientation. In today's episode, we examine the phenomenon and explain how you can "uninstall" those fake desires and return to a healthy, wholesome and authentic sexuality. Note: this is advanced content. If you are only just starting on your journey of addiction recovery, there is better content for you to start with. I recommend the first episode of the podcast: https://youtu.be/MIRntVnoX34?si=dPopq2M7SvNuOucE And this "how to quit" crash course: https://youtu.be/ttNE0Fd9PoI?si=lpu5g8QwD_TMkOdg Chapters: 00:00 An Important Warning 02:13 Emotional Burden 07:16 How to Heal 09:10 Real vs. Fake Desire 12:44 What Happens When You Quit 14:00 How to Develop Healthy Desire The most radical way to quit your addictions and reset your life: https://youtu.be/sbPSY9ktLIA?si=G7v2cPdbzEjdSJdb What happens if you relapse? https://youtu.be/lNvWG65Ta0Q?si=WHwPbEPpOTf7z4sk Why non-resistance is (scientifically) the best way to change: https://youtu.be/couAdusdd1w?si=dtuBOYkz4SXvWvhr
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageTue, 16 Apr 2024 - 18min - 30 - Feeling stuck? You need to hear these 2 stories...
Do you ever feel like you're trying so hard to improve yourself and improve your life... but you're not making any progress? You're watching all this self help content, reading books, learning strategies, trying new things but you're just not sure if any of it is working. If so, this is the most important message you need to hear. It's what I wish someone had told me 20+ years ago, when my own journey started. Only through years of experience in building several businesses and in developing my own skills (pretty much from total loser to living the dream life) did I finally understand what I'm sharing with you in this video.
Learn my system here: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/ 00:00 - Intro 01:27 - Building a Successful Business 04:29 - Turning My Life Around 08:17 - Success Paradox 09:41 - Lesson from 2 Stories 10:55 - Why this is a Hidden Truth 12:41 - How to Actually Win 15:56 - Conclusion
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageMon, 18 Mar 2024 - 16min - 29 - Does a girlfriend/wife solve your p*rn addiction problem?
Join the QuitByHealing community here: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/ "You're just doing it because you're single! Once you get a girlfriend or wife, you'll be fine!" This is what many people believe / hope about p*rn use and p*rn addiction. It's just a normal, harmless thing that guys do, right? And once you're partnered, the problems go away... Unfortunately, the opposite is often true and users find that their habit causes even MORE problems when they're in a relationship than when they were single. Today, we'll look at why this is and what you can do right now to prevent your addiction from ruining your next (or current) relationship. 00:00 Intro 01:03 My Story 06:17 How the addiction affects a relationship 08:58 When an addict gets into a relationship 11:10 What to Do: Single 15:28 What to Do: Partnered 17:18 Conclusion How to take leadership in communication & relationship: https://youtu.be/u4kOqFU7oj0 How to establish healthy boundaries: https://youtu.be/ijVGplE45gI How to completely reset your brain in 30 days: https://youtu.be/sbPSY9ktLIA Subscribe to the podcast, leave a voice note: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh Watch my interview on the Modern Couples Summit: https://summit.modern-couples.com/#aff=skillmedia
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageSat, 10 Feb 2024 - 18min - 28 - What you THINK you want is not what you REALLY want
...and realizing this is like a cheat code for life.
Join the QuitByHealing community: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/ You're making your life unnecessarily difficult by going after the things you want. Wait, what..? Isn't it a good thing to go for what you want? Well, yes. But there's one problem: the things you THINK you want aren't what you REALLY want. And in many cases, going after what you think you want actually makes it harder for you to get what you really want. I know this may sound a bit complicated, but that's exactly why I recorded this episode for the QuitByHealing podcast: once you understand this idea, it becomes a real life hack. It's what I used to shortcut my way to living my dream life. Sounds like a big claim, but I have the stories from my personal life to back it up. So strap in and take notes. If you get it, this might just change your life. Subscribe to the podcast, leave a voice note: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh 00:00 Intro 01:06 What You Think You Want vs. What You Really Want 01:25 I want the perfect physique 02:33 The Question 03:40 Lifting to Be Attractive to Women? 06:25 A shorter path to your goal 08:35 Direct or by Proxy? 09:07 I want a better jawline 10:04 I want status & respect 11:36 I want to be rich 14:10 Chasing Rainbows 14:41 Un-Addict Yourself 16:59 How to Do This 18:00 Conclusion The ultimate way to quit your addictions, reset your dopamine levels & become a radically better version of you: https://youtu.be/sbPSY9ktLIA?si=klTCTyDrI2Qcbr7Y The 3 stages of overcoming addictive behaviors: https://youtu.be/dXfLDUFt7jg?si=3i8Zs9zJ7Yq_CcwJ Being bored is good, actually: https://youtu.be/60ak4oTpPG4?si=PgFD5p59RxlC8RM1
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageSat, 20 Jan 2024 - 18min - 27 - How to Set Healthy Boundaries (like a real man) - and why it matters
Join the QuitByHealing community: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/
For men, our development is stunted by the modern world and most of us are stuck in "man-child mode" in many areas of our lives. In the last episode, I shared a technique you can use to form deep connections with people (like a mature man) instead of only shallow connections (like a child).
In this episode, we're looking at the flip side of this communication coin: how to establish and defend healthy boundaries.
This might sound simple, but the truth is that A) most likely no one has ever taught you how to do this and B) if you do this correctly, it's absolutely life changing.
If you:
find yourself surrounded by toxic people who don't support you are a pushover and you're tired of it want to be taken seriously want to be able to make a powerful impression on people want to be able to project authority want to be a more desirable manYou absolutely NEED the tool of healthy boundaries in your toolkit. 00:00 Intro 01:28 Not Everyone Deserves Your Trust 04:00 What Are Healthy Boundaries? 05:15 An Example 06:13 What Unhealthy Boundaries Look Like 07:36 Mature Communication is Contagious 08:52 Make a Better Impression 09:59 Become a Man of Values 13:46 How to Handle Boundary Violations 15:42 Practice in Small Steps 16:23 How it Changes Your Life 18:12 Surround Yourself With Excellence 19:08 Conclusion
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageFri, 29 Dec 2023 - 20min - 26 - Stop Being a Man-Child: Deep vs. Shallow Connections
Join the QuitByHealing community: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/ The world you live in is unfortunately keeping you stuck in man-child mode. This happens in many ways and one of them is the topic of this podcast episode: you never learn to create and cultivate deep social connections or deep romantic connections. The world (especially the online media world) is obsessed with all the aspects of shallow and fleeting connection. It trains you to chase variety and to see social connection through the lens of status. But shallow connections always leave you feeling empty and lonely, no matter how many people you're surrounded by. This applies to both platonic connections as well as romantic ones. In response to widespread dissatisfaction, we see a lot of complaining and entitlement. Everyone's unhappy and in the modern dating discourse, everyone's trying to find someone to blame for this unhappiness. Someone other than themselves, that is. Instead, let's look at exactly why this is happening and how you are being called to step up and take on the role of a mature man and the role of leadership in your relationships. 00:00 Intro 01:40 Two Modes of Connection 04:18 What Does it Mean to Connect Deeply? 08:27 Depth of Connection in Romance 10.37 Don't Know What You're Missing 13:22 How You're Stuck in Boyhood 14:30 Solution, Part 1 17:17 Solution, Part 2 18:40 Solution, Part 3 20:40 Growth Outside the Comfort Zone 21:57 Conclusion
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageSat, 16 Dec 2023 - 23min - 25 - How to Reinvent Yourself in 3 Months
Join the QuitByHealing community: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/
What does it take to transform your life completely? Is it even possible to go from dead-end existence, complete lack of direction, low energy, no motivation... to living an awesome life, feeling driven, feeling motivated every day?
As you'll discover in this episode, the answer is most definitely YES. But there are also clear reasons why most people never make such a dramatic transformation. Once you understand what's holding you back, you're one step closer to making it happen.
00:00 Intro 00:51 Is it even possible? 02:05 Resistance 04:53 Social Discomfort 06:16 Step 1: Replace Passive Consumption 07:37 Too extreme? 08:18 Change Your Brain 11:08 Why You Should to the Spartan Challenge 12:15 Creating instead of consuming 15:01 The Highest ROI Thing You Can Do 18:10 Rapid Skill Building 20:25 Conclusion 22:04 Digging My Own Grave?
The 30 day Spartan Mode challenge: https://youtu.be/sbPSY9ktLIA
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageSat, 09 Dec 2023 - 23min - 24 - Do THIS when the urge hits - The Ultimate Guide to Replacement Habits
Folks, this is a big one. We decided to once and for all, completely and comprehensively answer the question: "what should I do when I get the urge to relapse?"
This is the complete answer. Not only are we laying out 60+ options for what to do instead of relapsing, but we're exploring exactly why these things work and how it all fits together.
Find the full write up and visual mind-map here: https://quitbyhealing.com/urges/
Join the QuitByHealing community:
https://quitbyhealing.com/links/
Quit Porn Crash Course: https://quitbyhealing.com/quit-porn/
Topics covered in this episode:
00:00 The best way to deal with urges
01:21 The Two Categories
03:28 Exercise, Movement & Burpees
05:20 Don't just resist
07:21 Sport
08:50 Movement Skills
13:53 Movement is Brain Healthy
15:18 Cooking Skills
17:02 Emotional Skills
18:15 Introspective Writing
20:12 Meditation
21:39 Push a little further
23:35 Mental Skills (Reading)
29:40 Active learning & Mental Models
30:18 Social Skills
32:13 Communication Skills
35:38 Social Courage
38:08 Financial skills - Income, Save, Invest
38:39 Too many options
40:58 Rest
41:42 Nervous System - Breathwork
43:26 Addiction Replacement
48:56 Move Through the Urge
49:21 Sitting in the Fire, Embodiment & Boredom
53:00 Active Engagement: Shadow Work
54:00 Amplify the Feeling (Advanced)
57:47 How does this serve me?
01:00:02 Conversation with Addict Self (IFS)
01:03:25 Writing: Emo Dump
01:05:55 Self-Awareness is a Skill
01:07:08 Energy Transmutation Practices
01:11:42 Eureka Moments & Pointing Out the Obvious
01:12:41 What is the best thing to do?
01:18:10 Build your own Version
01:19:24 Where to start? (Self Responsibility)
01:23:18 Don't do it alone
The Summarised List & Full "How To Beat Urges" Protocol Details: https://quitbyhealing.com/urges/👆 NO SIGN UP REQUIRED - 100% free information to help you quit p*rn and other addictions.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageSat, 28 Oct 2023 - 1h 25min - 23 - P*rn addiction is the major roadblock between you and your goals
Join the QuitByHealing community: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/
Quit Porn Crash Course: https://quitbyhealing.com/quit-porn/
In this episode, Shane and Abhi take a deep dive into how pornography addiction (and other dopamine traps) can become the main obstacles preventing you from achieving your life's goals.
Through a community survey, we've identified the profound desires people have in life, with healthy relationships and personal growth emerging as top priorities. Of course, when an addiction to porn comes into play, your chances of success are significantly hindered, cutting you off at the knees.
Join us for a candid conversation about breaking free from these dopamine traps and regaining control of your life. Gain valuable insights and actionable advice on overcoming the allure of instant gratification and pursuing a brighter future.
The SPARTAN MODE Approach to Overcoming Addiction: https://youtu.be/sbPSY9ktLIA
Chapters in this podcast
00:00 - Intro: Is porn a roadblock to your best self?
02:24 - Community Survey: You Want to be a Better Man
06:36 - Sexual Energy is your Life Force
14:04 - A distorted view of Success
18:31 - The Impossible Standard
25:10 - IRL Feels Good
29:07 - Dopamine traps are keeping you stuck
34:08 - The Comfort Trap: Abundance
40:20 - Self Control is the Key
43:12 - Don't wait for rock bottom
Join the QuitByHealing community: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/
Quit Porn Crash Course: https://quitbyhealing.com/quit-porn/
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageSun, 15 Oct 2023 - 49min - 22 - Why Self Development Advice Just Doesn't Work (for you...)
Join the QuitByHealing community: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/
A lot of folks in the self-development community often find themselves sifting through advice that may not be relevant to their situation. They encounter elite optimization plans, intense bootcamps, and claims of "the fastest and best" methods to achieve their goals, typically offered by high-achievers and coaches.
In this podcast episode, we're introducing a model that breaks down self-development into four levels. This model will assist you in assessing your current level and provide practical tips to help you progress up the ranks.
The Levels of Self Development:
Level Zero - No Lifer
Level 1 - GYST
Level 2 - The Top 1%
Level 3 - Mastery & Paying it Forward
The 5 Pillars of GYST (Get your Sh*t Together):
1 - Physical (Fitness, Strength, Mobility & Nutrition)
2 - Emotional (Awareness & Resilience)
3 - Metal (Knowledge & Development)
4 - Social (Communication & Relationships)
5 - Financial (Literacy & Career Capital)
To get the full episodes on how to practically improve these domains in your life see ikario podcast.
Physical https://youtu.be/gfYaJ9TTqzE
Emotional https://youtu.be/mTGLM0bKOOs
Metal https://youtu.be/f6LiWVBZwGY
Social https://youtu.be/IVuOh1llq64
Financial https://youtu.be/goZ9EzldSko
Chapters in this podcast
00:00 - Intro: What advice is right for me?
03:31 - The 4 Levels of Personal Development
04:23 - Level Zero: No-Lifer
07:42 - Addiction Keeps You Stuck
11:02 - Unconsciously Seeking Escape
15:16 - You Cannot Consume a Solution
16:03 - Level 1: GYST (Get Your Shit Together)
19:26 - Level 2: Top 1%
22:56 - Level 3: Mastery & Paying it Forward
25:23 - Motivated by Making a Difference
29:10 - Role Modelling to Make a Change
32:44 - Level Zero Advice: Stacking Small Wins
38:45 - Start Where You're At
40:16 - High-Functioning Level Zero
42:43 - Deliberate Action
44:24 - Tracking Small Wins
45:06 - Level 1 Advice: Kill Internal Suffering
48:01 - Level 1 Advice: Consistency & Remove Friction
56:31 - What is a Skill I Need?
59:16 - The Basics Are Underestimated
1:03:52 - Level 2 Advice: Prioritize & Optimize
1:08:49 - Level 3 Advice: Be open to the Transition
1:10:01 - Summary of the Levels
1:12:21 - Outro
Join the QuitByHealing community: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/
The SPARTAN MODE Approach to Overcoming Addiction: https://youtu.be/XIJs36sHZo0?si=V7DOhfNtFNRCxbeQ
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageTue, 03 Oct 2023 - 1h 14min - 21 - Porn Addiction Makes a Mess of Your Relationship to Sex & Sexuality
Join the QuitByHealing community to beat p*rn addiction once and for all: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/
Porn addiction is a serious issue. It affects mental health, mood, motivation and many other aspects of life. Not least, it affects everything related to love, dating, romance and sex.
As I've discovered through my work with addicts, the addiction creates a complicated, tangled mess that construes all the guilt and shame associated with pornography overuse with healthy desire, romantic feelings and acts of self pleasure.
In this podcast episode, I attempt to untangle this mess so that you can move towards a healthy, happy relationship with desire, sex and romance in your own life.
In this episode:
00:00 - Intro
01:09 - What is and isn’t harmful
03:50 - A much needed definition of terms
05:12 - Why the untangling is important
06:32 - Religion and shame
07:33 - What it means for quitting
10:08 - Unhealthy self pleasure?
12:49 - Healthy self pleasure habits
14:34 - How porn addiction affects partnered sex
17:04 - Sex and human connection
18:50 - A period of abstinence
20:23 - Beware of simple stories
The most effective way to beat p*rn addiction and rapidly rewire your brain: https://youtu.be/sbPSY9ktLIA?si=jkYHWMHeEONt8DZ5
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageThu, 21 Sep 2023 - 22min - 20 - 30 Days of Spartan Mode: What it's Really Like to Radically Reset Your Brain
Join the QuitByHealing community: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/
My 30 day challenge summary - see what SPARTAN MODE actually looks like: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sbPSY9ktLIA
I followed the Spartan Mode protocol for 30 days. The protocol is designed to completely obliterate all bad habits, addictions and all the ways in which we keep ourselves from really living to our full potential.
In this episode, I share in detail what the experience was like and what lessons I took from it.
What we cover:
- The most surprising and unexpected positive effects of cutting out ALL media consumption.
- Why doing an extreme challenge is easier than doing a moderate challenge.
- How Spartan Mode is designed to unhook you from addictive behaviors AND rewire your brain as quickly as possible.
- How to transition back into "real life" after such an extreme challenge.
- What the hardest thing about the challenge was, which almost made me give up.
- The most important lessons I took from the challenge and how you can use them to your advantage.
Check out the QuitByHealing Program here: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageMon, 18 Sep 2023 - 1h 06min - 19 - “It’s impossible to quit!” - limiting beliefs that keep you addicted
Join the QuitByHealing Community: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/
Since starting QuitByHealing, I have received thousands of comments on my videos, TikToks and in the QbH community. In all of these comments, I am seeing clear patterns and one of them is this:
There are 3 limiting beliefs that are very common... and that make you fail because they create a self fulfilling prophecy. So in today's podcast episode, we examine these 3 limiting beliefs, look at how they are part of your self sabotaging behavior and discover what you can do to fix them.
Subscribe to the podcast, leave a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh
00:00 - Intro
01:15 - Limiting Belief Nr. 1
02:30 - Fun With Cognitive Biases
05:03 - Cognitive Biases in Action
05:43 - Self Fulfilling Prophecy
06:53 - How to Fix Limiting Belief Nr. 1
09:49 - Limiting Belief Nr. 2
12:53 - How to Fix Limiting Belief Nr. 2
15:42 - A Tool for Awareness
16:30 - Limiting Belief Nr. 3
18:15 - How to Fix Limiting Belief Nr. 3
19:03 - The 4 Pillars of QuitByHealing
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageThu, 31 Aug 2023 - 26min - 18 - Escape the Realm of Hungry Ghosts with Jeremy Lipkowitz
All the QuitByHealing links & resources: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/
All of Jeremy's links & resources: https://linktr.ee/jeremymindful
Check out Jeremy's podcast here: https://podcasts.apple.com/podcast/id1648984850
In today's episode of the podcast, meet Jeremy Lipkowitz. He is a guy who seemingly had it all: academic and athletic success, friends, good health and hopeful prospects for the future... and yet, he was plagued with an addiction to pornography that stole all his joy.
He got fed up with this state of being and chose a radical solution: he left his life behind, traveled to India and studied meditation and other contemplative practices. He was determined to get to the bottom of why his mind kept him stuck in compulsive behaviors and why he was unable to be happy despite things seemingly going so well in his life.
The lessons he brought back from this journey not only helped him overcome his addiction but also changed his life in countless other ways. And today, he shares some of his most valuable insights with us.
Chapters:
00:00 Intro
01:32 Jeremy's Turning Point
04:32 How to Gain Awareness
07:43 Hungry Ghost Behavior
12:15 Addiction Despite Living the Dream Life?
17:25 How to Untangle Yourself from Addiction
21:00 Expert Doom Scrollers
22:38 What is the Default State of Your Mind?
24:27 How to Transform Your Mind
27:27 Why You're Suffering
31:03 Rat Park Experiment
34:52 Where to Start the Healing Process
38:04 What to Do When You Relapse
39:37 Unwinding Your Feelings of Shame
44:17 A Uniquely Difficult Challenge
48:49 A Goal Worth Striving For
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageWed, 23 Aug 2023 - 51min - 17 - Create a STRONG WHY to Beat Your Addiction
An important tool in your arsenal against temptations, urges and relapses is what we call a strong why. Having a strong, clear, emotionally resonant reason fro WHY you want to quit can make all the difference in a critical moment.
In this episode, you'll discover exactly how a STRONG WHY works and the practical way in which you can create one for yourself.
00:00 Intro 00:57 The Counter Force 01:53 Example of a WEAK WHY 03:03 What Makes a STRONG WHY 05:46 The Painful Way to Create a STRONG WHY 07:51 How to Create Your WHY 12:43 Putting it Into Practice 14:46 Conclusion
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageFri, 11 Aug 2023 - 15min - 16 - Stop Fooling Yourself: an unconventional way to beat your addiction
Join the community, take the program, find all the important links: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/
If you're trying to overcome addictive behavior, compulsive behavior or even just bad habits, here's an unusual thing to consider: what if you don't actually WANT TO quit?
What if you're telling yourself that you really want to quit, that you want to improve and leave this addictive behavior behind... but there's part of you that really doesn't believe that.
This might seem strange or even dangerous to consider, but in today's podcast episode we explore why this idea can hold the key to the breakthrough you've been looking for.
Ideas explored in this episode:
00:00 Stuck in the Relapse Cycle 01:34 A Not on Parts Work 02:28 The Reasonable Addict 04:37 Time to Stop Fooling Yourself 06:42 The SHTF Moment 10:04 How to Change Before Hitting Rock Bottom 12:21 Porn Use & Desire 14:53 How Awareness Helped Me Heal 17:28 Your Turn to Try
Subscribe to the podcast & leave a voice message here: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh
How to quit porn, the crash course: https://youtu.be/ttNE0Fd9PoI
Get my 21 day step-by-step program for overcoming porn addiction:https://quitbyhealing.com/links/
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageWed, 26 Jul 2023 - 18min - 15 - The Cause of ALL Addictive Behavior
Join my Discord community & get the QuitByHealing Program here: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/
Addiction is a tricky problem, but what if the cause of it doesn't have to be complicated? What if there was a single, unifying source behind all addictive behaviors? And what if once you understand this, there's also a single, practical path to unwinding addiction?
I believe this is true, it's just that the source is a bit hard to see. Especially in the context of our culture and double especially if you're a man...
Topics we visit in this episode:
- Why addiction is always a coping mechanism
- How to understand the link between emotional pain and addictive behavior
- The crucial difference between how to deal with emotional vs. physical pain
- What we can learn from grief and a healthy grieving process
- How all of this relates to p*rn addiction
- How to turn this insight into a practical solution
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageTue, 11 Jul 2023 - 26min - 14 - The real reason bad habits are hard to break (and what to do about it) - Invisible Consequences
Join the QuitByHealing Program to overcome p*rn addiction in just 21 days: https://quitbyhealing.com/links/ Why is it so hard to shake bad habits and addictive behaviors? And on the other hand, it's also hard to create GOOD habits? Seems unfair. In this podcast episode, we explore the key obstacle: invisible consequences. You'll understand why you struggle with behavior change and you'll learn a simple and practical tool you can use to mitigate the problem of invisible consequences.
In today's episode, we look at the concept of Invisible Consequences, why they make habit change so difficult and 2 practical things you can do to overcome this problem.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageWed, 28 Jun 2023 - 18min - 13 - The PIED Episode - how to solve porn-induced erectile dysfunction
Join the Discord community & access my free courses: https://discord.gg/GuacgrT6Qp Leave a voice message: https://anchor.fm/qbh Today, we're answering a question sent in by a listener about PIED, porn induced erectile dysfunction. Also known as: not being able to stay hard during sex because you've desensitized yourself with pornography. The bad news is this: while porn can and often does cause ED, eliminating porn from your life is sometimes not enough to solve the problem. The good news is: you CAN solve this problem and in this episode, you'll learn exactly how. The even better news is: as a side effect of the method I teach here, you'll end up having much better sex than ever before! 00:00 Intro & Question 01:36 The Simple Solution Doesn't Work 03:02 How Porn Causes ED 06:22 Lifestyle Factors & ED 07:50 Psychological ED 11:56 How to Solve Psychological ED 12:08 Method 1: How to Stop Worrying 15:09 Method 2: Learn to Tease 20:47 How to Gain Confidence 23:07 Conclusion How to quit porn without relapsing: https://youtu.be/lQgquJeV6Vk How to heal the root causes of your porn addiction: https://youtu.be/6kLDX56sUzs
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageTue, 11 Apr 2023 - 24min - 12 - The 5 Levels of Porn Addiction (this is why everyone's confused about this topic)
Join the Discord community & access my Introspective Writing tutorials: https://discord.gg/GuacgrT6Qp Why is there so much confusion on this topic? Some people claim that pornography is completely harmless and everyone has the right to get off on whatever they want. Other people claim porn is the worst thing ever, will lead to the demise of humanity... oh and by the way, if you quit, you get superpowers! It can be confusing and frustrating for anyone trying to navigate this space and figuring out what is best for themselves. The main reason for all this confusion is that most people don't realize that A) porn addiction exists and B) there are levels to it. Once you understand what these levels are, you also understand why people disagree so much and why different kinds of advice will either work or not work for different kinds of people.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageTue, 04 Apr 2023 - 31min - 11 - How to Make Your "If-Then Plan" to Deal With Urges & Avoid Relapse
Join the Discord & get support from the whole community: https://discord.gg/GuacgrT6Qp
One of the most fundamental and powerful tools to quit porn addiction (or any addiction, really) is to create a plan for how to deal with urges. Because let's face it: when you quit, it won't just be smooth sailing. You WILL experience the urge to relapse. You WILL get triggered. And if you don't have a plan in place that you made in advance of that happening, your chances of success are low.
In this episode, we're looking at exactly what you need to do to formulate your own "if-then plan" and make sure you can deal with whatever urges hit you.
Subscribe to the podcast and leave a voice message here: https://anchor.com/qbh
Chapters:
=======00:00 Intro
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/message
00:42 Why You Need a Plan
02:08 Breathwork
06:14 The Embodiment Method
07:04 Environment Change
07:43 Burpees
09:58 Introspective Writing
10:58 How to Implement Your PlanSun, 12 Mar 2023 - 13min - 10 - How to Quit Porn While You're in a Relationship
Join the Discord community to get help in quitting porn: https://discord.gg/GuacgrT6Qp
You're in a relationship and you have an unhealthy habit of using pornography? It's perhaps already caused some issues for your with your partner, maybe also in the bedroom... and you're ready to quit porn.
What do you need to know about how to best quit porn while you're in a relationship with your girlfriend or wife? What's different for partnered guys, compared to single guys? This question was asked by some guys in the community, so here's my comprehensive guide.
Note: all of this is coming from the perspective of a man (the porn addict/quitter) who is in a hetero, monogamous relationship with a woman. Many of these same ideas will apply to other relationship configurations as well, but the hetero one is the only one where I can talk from my own experience.
Topics in this episode:
00:00 Intro
02:26 No more sex?
04:00 How porn affects your love life
06:36 The recovery phase
12:20 Communication(!)
13:30 What if you can't talk to your partner
17:23 How to communicate with your partner
19:14 The flatline
21:13 Improve your love life
26:46 Your true desires
32:00 The timeline
33:57 A stronger relationshipAs mentioned in the episode, I don't cover every strategy and tactic here, only the differences between single and coupled guys trying to quit. If you aren't familiar with the QuitByHealing method yet, these videos are a good starting point:
- 2 things you must know to quit porn: https://youtu.be/sVCbBgS1Pe8
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/message
- How to quit porn, the crash course: https://youtu.be/ttNE0Fd9PoI
- The best and worst replacement habits: https://youtu.be/p6Qi8KrFOfE
- Why porn is a hyperstimulus and what that does to your brain: https://youtu.be/jRYhSKF_qZU
- How to go through the healing process: https://youtu.be/6kLDX56sUzsFri, 03 Mar 2023 - 35min - 9 - The 3 Stages of Overcoming Porn Addiction (Fire, Earth, Water)
Join the Discord community: https://discord.gg/GuacgrT6Qp
In this episode, you'll discover the 3 distinct stages you go through as your quit your porn addiction and rebuild better habits and a better life. Why 3 stages? Because what works in one doesn't necessarily work in the others. So without a framework like this, you could end up feeling stuck even though you seemingly do everything right. We'll also discuss the importance of being aware of your intention and how you can catch your "addict self" before you fall into a full relapse.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageWed, 01 Mar 2023 - 20min - 8 - The Price of Instant Gratification & the Dopamine Problem Everyone is Suffering From
Join the Discord community & delete your porn addiction for good: https://discord.gg/GuacgrT6Qp
Today, we're looking at a problem that includes pornography addiction, but also goes FAR beyond it. Let's talk about how everyone's addicted to "dopamine dispensers" and what this is doing to our mood, mental health & motivation. We even get into some dating advice, in this episode.
Do you know someone who's like Joey from this episode! Make sure to share this with them, you could save them a whole lot of pain and trouble.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageThu, 16 Feb 2023 - 19min - 7 - Hard Mode, Monk Mode, SPARTAN Mode - what's the perfect way to quit porn?
Join the Discord community: https://discord.gg/GuacgrT6Qp
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What is the PERFECT way to overcome porn addiction and heal your brain to reverse all the negative effects the addiction has on your life? If you ask this question in a NoFap community, you'll probably hear about "hard mode" and "monk mode". In this episode, I explain why these protocols don't go far enough and this is where Spartan Mode comes in. We'll run through the steps in this protocol. Don't mistake this for a random list of "do this" and "don't do that" - the protocol is carefully designed to put you into the optimal state for healing. To learn more details about all the steps in Spartan Mode, check out this video on my YouTube channel (https://youtu.be/XIJs36sHZo0).
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What we cover in this episode is twofold: we look at the "perfect", optimal protocol for quitting porn. But we also look at the reasons why "perfect" is sometimes not the right choice.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageTue, 14 Feb 2023 - 18min - 6 - How to go through the HEALING process & quit porn for good
Join the QuitByHealing Discord community: https://discord.gg/GuacgrT6Qp
Today, we're taking a closer look at the HEALING part of QuitByHealing. You'll discover what a huge difference it makes to include this in your process (yes, you can quit porn WITHOUT healing - but I don't recommend it) and I lay out the basic tools you need to start this healing process for yourself. If you are on the journey of kicking your porn habit and you want to gain a deeper understanding of this key aspect of addiction recovery, this episode is for you!
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageThu, 26 Jan 2023 - 20min - 5 - Regulating Your Dopamine is the Skill of the Century
Join the QuitByHealing Discord community: https://discord.gg/GuacgrT6Qp
What is the most important skill you can learn to improve your life? In this episode, you'll discover why it is the exact skill you need to learn to overcome porn addiction: self regulation.
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/message
By the end of the episode, you'll understand why the world we live in is the way it is. Why so many people are suffering and struggling. And you'll see - maybe for the first time - how it relates to the giant industries that are behind all of it. Because of the way the world is right now, because of the power of the attention economy, there's no more valuable skill to learn than that of self regulation. He who controls how he gets his dopamine, wins at life.Thu, 19 Jan 2023 - 20min - 4 - How to Quit Porn Without Relapsing - Your 4 Step Plan
Most guys who attempt to kick their habit of watching porn try, manage for a few days and then relapse. Sadly, this cycle repeats many times over and many give up entirely. But it doesn't have to be like that! In this episode, I provide you with a complete action plan - a step by step system that gives you a fighting chance to beat this addiction. Listen in to discover why awareness is the most powerful tool at your disposal, how to address your triggers so that you have fewer urges to fight, why pen & paper are your best friends and the surprising way in which getting into some really, really cold water helps with overcoming bad habits! Join my Discord to get help from me directly: https://discord.gg/GuacgrT6Qp
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageSun, 08 Jan 2023 - 28min - 3 - Quit Porn, Keep Masturbating?! In Depth Guide to My Uncommon Advice
Today, we're answering all the questions about porn vs. masturbating WITHOUT porn. Is masturbation by itself harmful? Or is the real problem pornography? Also, are there health benefits, or health drawbacks to masturbating?
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If you want to fully understand why many people in the NoFap community are stuck in an endless cycle of trying to quit, relapse and binge and why my recommendations are different from what you usually find, this is the episode for you.
Join my Discord community to get porn free the easy way: https://discord.gg/GuacgrT6Qp
Source of the study referenced in the episode: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/27871956/Thu, 05 Jan 2023 - 25min - 2 - Why Porn Keeps You Sexually Immature (and how to fix that)
Pornography affects men in many ways. One of the less talked about things is sexual maturity. A lack of sexual maturity is at the same time a cause and an effect of porn use. And for guys who want to truly HEAL their porn addiction and not just cope with it for the rest of their lives, this is a really important area of life to address. In this episode, we dive into WHY most men are sexually immature, what exactly that means, how it connects to your porn consumption and why maturing is a key component of healing. Join my Discord community to get help from me directly: https://discord.gg/GuacgrT6Qp
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageTue, 03 Jan 2023 - 21min - 1 - You NEED to hear this if you want to quit porn AND improve your life
In my content about overcoming porn addiction, there are always 2 camps of people duking it out in the comments section. There's the deniers who believe porn isn't harmful and doing nofap won't improve your life. And there's the believers who already acknowledge the harmful effects and advocate for being porn free.
In this episode, I share a message that will probably upset people on BOTH sides. But it's an important message. It explains why some deniers say they tried to quit and it didn't improve anything in their lives. And it explains why even some dedicated nofappers are actually wasting the opportunity in front of them.
Join the Discord to get my help and quit porn for good: https://discord.gg/GuacgrT6Qp
See my content on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UChfZvCuX59fndVSKcsn87_Q
--- Send in a voice message: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/qbh/messageFri, 30 Dec 2022 - 15min
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