Down To Earth with the Burucharas

In today's episode, Callie and David answer some of your burning questions about navigating adult relationships with parents. Thanks to all of you who took the time to submit questions that include:dealing with your in-law's problematic behaviorhow to relate to and honor step-parentsdealing with an abusive step-parent from another cultureattending therapy to address issues with your parentsand more!--------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoughts on the podcast! Got any...

This week, we address a topic often avoided but inevitably encountered—the loss of our parents and navigating the associated grief. This episode features a heartfelt conversation with David's cousin, Miriam, reflecting on the memories and lessons from her grief journey following her father's passing in 2020. Join us as we delve into various approaches to grief, the unique impact of a parent's loss, surprising effects of grief, and more.Learn more about Miriam's professional journey here and f...

In this week's episode, Callie and David open up about their respective relationships with their in-laws, discussing the joys and the risks that in-law relationships can bring. They also share 4 key rules for successfully relating with your in-laws. Join in on the conversation as we unravel the art of balancing love, boundaries, and understanding in the world of in-law relationships.Submit your questions for this season's Q&A episode here: Season 4 Q&A Submission Form-----------...

In this episode, we are honored to introduce Ann Marie Smith, a parent of adult children who shares her insights drawn from decades of parenting and her coaching program, Parent Possible. Ann Marie's perspective revolves around the notion that "childhood is fleeting, but being a parent is forever." She emphasizes the mutual benefits that adulthood can bring to both parents and their adult children. Join us as we explore how the dynamics of parent-child relationships evolve into adulthood, and...

In last week’s episode, we explored the signs and effects of emotional immaturity in parents. Today, we dive into practical ways of navigating these complex dynamics as an adult with an emotionally immature parent. Tune in as we discuss the following strategies:letting go of the fantasyhow to individuate and process your feelingsfocusing on what you can controlestablishing appropriate boundaries Dr. Lindsay C. Gibson's book: Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal fro...

In today's episode, we uncover both the obvious and subtle signs that indicate emotional immaturity in parents, exploring the profound impact it can have on their children's emotional well-being and future relationships. Whether you're a parent seeking to better understand your own behaviors or someone who grew up with emotionally immature parents, this episode will help you identify the 4 types of emotional immaturity that parents tend to fall in. Next week, we'll discuss how to practically ...

In this episode, we're joined by friend and marriage & family therapist, Candis Braxton. Join us as we explore how the influences of our parents/caregivers echo within us long into adulthood. Learn how to identify and confront these internalized voices, appreciate the gifts and gaps that we've received from our parents, and how to build healthier relationships with our parents in the present.Candis Braxton is a Licensed Marriage and Family Associate Therapist (LMFT-A) in North Carolina, p...

Welcome back! In our last episode, we dove into what it means to honor our parents as adults. Today, we're stepping into the next part of our conversation: forgiving our parents. What does forgiveness have to do with honoring? Is forgiveness as simple as "forgive and forget" or is there more to it? And how do we forgive that which we may have not yet named? Why is it especially hard to do so with our parents? Let's talk.--------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoughts on the ...

Welcome back to Season 4 of the podcast! The DTE listener community has spoken - we're diving headfirst into the complexities of Adult Relationships with Parents. In this season's opener, we begin to unravel what it means to honor our parents. How do we honor our parents as adults? What happens when we feel like our parents don’t deserve any honor at all? What then? And how does our mental health and individuality fit into the picture? Tune in for the first part of the conversation.-----...

Callie and David are back for Season 4! Listen in to find out what relationship topic we'll be exploring this season!--------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoughts on the podcast! Got any questions, topic suggestions, or just want to get in touch? We'd love to hear from you via this quick feedback form: https://tally.so/r/w4Jkgr

In this episode, Joy Ofodu, comedy creator and host of the Dating Unsettled podcast, shares her personal dating journey and how she approached online dating with a specific strategy. She talks about the ups and downs of her dating experiences and the valuable lessons she learned along the way. Eventually, she found her bae and shares the story of how they met. Joy also introduces the concept of "hardballing" and explains how it can be a useful tool in dating. Tune in to hear Joy's insightful ...

In today's episode, Callie and David answer some of your burning questions about dating. Thanks to all of you who took the time to submit questions; here are the questions tackled in order:(04:07) Should I still date someone I don’t find attractive? (09:23) On paper, they’re perfect, but there's no chemistry. What do I do?(14:14) When should I bring up my past relationships?(22:08) We agreed to meet but haven’t heard from him. Should I let it go?(28:20) How quickly do you bring up things...

In this episode, Callie & David explore the important but often awkward "defining the relationship" conversation when dating. The DTR conversation can be the crucial difference between intentionally moving forward in a relationship or letting circumstances and faulty assumptions shape your dating experience. Join us as we dive into:When to have the DTR talk and how to initiate it Common fears and misconceptions about DTRTips for handling the conversation with grace and honestyDealing...

In this episode, Callie & David talk about conversations to have on dates that can drastically improve your dating experience. They share tips for less awkward interactions and more natural, fun, & meaningful discussions. They also provide helpful tools w/ examples for assessing whether it’s worth going on a 2nd or 3rd date. Join us as we explore:Transitioning from small talk to deep talkConversation topics on a dateDisclaimers vs. explanationsLeading with vulnerability & clarityJ...

Share your questions for our upcoming Dating Q&A + vote for the season 4 theme: www.bit.ly/dte-survey In this special episode, Callie has a conversation with her best friend Emely Umaña. As they reminisce about their 15-year friendship, Emely opens up about her personal journey with singleness and dating. With grace and wisdom, Emely reflects on how her attitude and approach to dating has evolved over time, and shares valuable insights for anyone navigating their dating journey. ----...

In this episode, Callie and David share tips and insights on how to meet potential partners within and beyond your current circles. They discuss different places and spaces where many couples first meet but most significantly, they emphasize the importance of approaching dating with a mindset that prioritizes reasonable efforts over immediate results.--------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoughts on the podcast! Got any questions, topic suggestions, or just want to get in t...

Attachment theory suggests that the quality of our early relationships with caregivers - how we received love - shapes our attachment style, influencing how we form and maintain relationships throughout our lives. In this episode, Callie and David delve into how our frustrating patterns in dating are often related to our attachment styles. They explore how we can better understand ourselves, relate with others, and build more secure dating dynamics.--------------------------------We're eager ...

In our first guest episode of season 3, we're joined by globetrotter Jasper Iturriaga. Jasper is known by many for his amazing storytelling about his journies all around the world but in this episode, we zoom in and take a closer look at the man behind the camera to learn about his romantic life. Jasper is both wise and hilarious, honest and hopeful as he shares valuable lessons we can all appreciate that his travels have taught him about singleness and dating.Jasper is a photographer and a f...

Is it helpful to have a "type" when we date? Or should our tastes be more flexible when finding love? In this episode, David and Callie talk about what their types were before they met, exploring: the 3Ps that influence our typewhy it's important to question your typehow our type is often not actually our typeand how to differentiate between values and type in dating--------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoughts on the podcast! Got any questions, topic suggestions...

Welcome back to season 3! In this first episode, Callie and David talk about the 3 dating tendencies: a helpful framework that highlights three common blind spots most people have in their dating lives. Taken from Logan Ury's book, How To Not Die Alone, finding out your tendency can help you understand the struggles you face in your dating journey along with strategies to help you overcome them. Find out your dating tendency at: https://loganury.com/quiz ---------------------------...

We're back with Season 3 next week!--------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoughts on the podcast! Got any questions, topic suggestions, or just want to get in touch? We'd love to hear from you via this quick feedback form: https://tally.so/r/w4Jkgr

In this 100th and final episode of season 2, Callie takes over and switches things up for a change. Also, tune in for to learn more about our newsletter launching next week!Sign up for our newsletter launching Oct 14 at theburucharas.com!--------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoughts on the podcast! Got any questions, topic suggestions, or just want to get in touch? We'd love to hear from you via this quick feedback form: https://tally.so/r/w4Jkgr

Sign up for our newsletter launching Oct 14 at theburucharas.com!---In this episode, we're joined by Krystin Henley, LMFT, to learn about sexual betrayal: its trauma and recovery. We begin by unpacking what constitutes betrayal in a relationship and dive into Krystin's own story of broken trust and healing. We learn about the Intimacy Pyramid as an essential tool for building intimacy after broken trust, what to do while dating to prevent sexual betrayal in a future marriage, and more!Intimac...

Sign up for our newsletter launching Oct 14 at theburucharas.com!---On Sunday morning February 23rd, 2020, David and Callie, then a freshly married couple, embarked on what they thought would be a pleasant 2-3 hour hike up the Platteklip Gorge trail of Table Mountain in Cape Town, South Africa. Little did they know, a day-long adventure was awaiting them...this is the story. --------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoughts on the podcast! Got any questions, topic suggest...

Sign up for our newsletter launching Oct 14 at theburucharas.com!---In this episode, Seth Day joins us to discuss his and Heather Thompson Day's upcoming book, "I'll See You Tomorrow: Building Relational Resilience When You Want to Quit". We explore Seth's inspiration behind the book that started 17 years ago after his brother's passing, his subsequent grief, and journey to healing. Woven into Seth's story is the beautiful truth that we can still find possibility when the ideals of a relation...

Today's episode is inspired by a conversation Callie recently had with a friend and regular listener of the podcast. As they chatted, she shared, " I love your podcast and your relationship. But sometimes it just feels...unattainable." In this episode, David and Callie clarify how far from perfect their relationship is and share five attainable steps they've taken over the past 7 years, with much much grace, to grow their relationship to where it is today. -------------------------------...

In our monthly relationship Q&A episodes, we gather and discuss questions directly from YOU! We invite you to come along as we relate our shared experiences and discover helpful principles for healthier relationships. Topics covered in this episode:4:49 - Staying at your partner's parent's house while dating, is it right? 13:55 - Can the end of infatuation signal the end of a relationship?20:17 - I'm in love with a married man. What do I do?36:42 - Are men affected by women bein...

In this final episode in our mentorship series, David sits down with Audrey Bolo, a friend and certified professional career coach to learn about:- her colorful career journey- how to navigate a drastic career shift- what do when you don't land your dream job - what career coaching actually looks like- how to navigate pursuing our purpose and passions, all while paying the bills. Audrey Bolo is the face behind Your Truth Coach, helping professionals seek their own balance, clarity, and ...

In this episode, we continue our miniseries on mentorship with Sebastien Braxton. Sebastien draws from over 100,000 hours of mentorship experience to share 1) the qualities to look for in a prospective mentor, 2) how to effectively ask someone to be your mentor, and 3) much more! Sebastien J. Braxton is the CEO of Fiat Lux, a Christian mentorship and creative agency, and The New Life Challenge, a corporate wellness start-up. He is also a member of the InVerse team, a young adult bible s...

In this episode, we begin a short miniseries on mentorship with the help of three-time guest Sebastien Braxton. Sebastien draws on his mentorship experiences over the years, showing how a successful mentorship starts with the right motives and a teachable attitude. Sebastien J. Braxton is the CEO of Fiat Lux, a Christian mentorship and creative agency, and The New Life Challenge, a corporate wellness start-up. He is also a member of the InVerse team, a young adult bible study program on...

In today's episode, we explore the often difficult decision of picking up one's familiar life and moving to a new city, country or even continent for the sake of love. Some call this foolish. Others say it's the sweetest gesture of affection. We say it depends. Join us as we share our experiences moving for love and some key factors worth considering when facing such a decision in your life and relationships. --------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoughts on the podcas...

In this episode, we launch our discussion with a friendship question we've received regularly: what do I do when my friend hardly ever initiates contact? Essentially, what do we do when a friend is not meeting our expectations of the friendship? Join us as we unpack this question and explore different friendship communication styles, how to evaluate the strength of a friendship and when to reconsider a friendship. --------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoughts on...

In this episode, Callie and David tackle four dating questions submitted on Instagram recently by listeners! Here are the questions: 00:00 - How can you tell a guy likes you?12:25 - What does it mean to let a man pursue you, and is it even a legitimate principle to follow?30:26 - What to do when you are attracted to more than one person?41:20 - I've given them a chance, but I'm just not attracted to them. What do I do?Follow @davidburuchara on Instagram to keep posted on upcoming polls to sub...

80% of couples that live together disagree and stress about household chores. But these disagreements often say more about the relationship than the monotonous tasks being argued about! Whether you're in a romantic relationship or not, understanding how to navigate chores with the people you live with is an essential skill for a happier life. Join Callie and David as they share their chore war history and how they're learning to love each other through it. -------------------------------...

In this episode, David and Callie discuss maintaining the delicate and beautiful balance of interdependence in relationships. On one side of the spectrum is independence, where too much of it means you don't have a relationship. The other side is codependence, where you can't tell the difference between two individuals because they are so enmeshed. We each tend to lean towards one side based on several factors (e.g. at the beginning of a relationship, more independence is reasonable). By firs...

In this episode, we move the opposite end of the spectrum from love bombing to focus on breadcrumbing. Breadcrumbing is a type of manipulation where one person keeps another's interest and devotion alive by feeding them the smallest possible bits of attention, often in an inconsistent manner. We discuss a key difference between breadcrumbing and misaligned expectations, then dive into how to spot breadcrumbing in its various forms, and how to stop the behavior in its tracks! ------------...

In this episode, we explore how crucial giving feedback and receiving feedback is as an interpersonal skill for closer relationships. It can be really uncomfortable to give/receive feedback and to grow in this area with loved ones. But it is possible! Feedback is not only a window into how others perceive us that might reveal much about ourselves, both positive and constructive. It is also a portal to building more intimate relationships. Step in with us!--------------------------------...

In this shorter episode, reacting to a comment from a New York Times article, Callie and David share their thoughts on what "work" means in a relationship. Should a relationship require work? How much work and what kind of work? Is there a danger in idolizing "work" and hardship/suffering in relationships? --------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoughts on the podcast! Got any questions, topic suggestions, or just want to get in touch? We'd love to hear from you via thi...

In this episode, we discuss love bombing, a type of manipulation where someone “bombs” you with extreme displays of attention and affection in order to selfishly gain from it. It can happen early on in dating relationships but also in long-term abusive ones. We discuss how this is a key method used by narcissists and conmen, like the Tinder Swindler, but also discover more common yet subtle unintentional forms of love bombing in our relationships. Join us to learn what love bombing is, how to...

Is it ever okay to agree to disagree? Does doing so ever bring people closer together or only ever push them further apart? While there's much to say about this topic in our polarized society, in this episode, David and Callie open up about conflicts in their relationship where agreeing to disagree has gone both well and not so well. The Gottman Institute reports that 69% of conflict is unresolvable, meaning successful relationships are where people learn how to navigate instead of avoiding t...

Join Callie and David for the 2nd part of this short series on attachment theory, exploring how attachment explains our unique patterns for seeking and avoiding connection. David and Callie have been reading through "How We Love" by Milan & Kay Yerkovich, a highly recommended resource to learn about your attachment (love) style and how to improve the quality of your relationships. In this episode, they reflect on their individual styles and how it has impacted their relationship. We...

In this episode, we're joined by Dr. Torben Bergland as he introduces us to the wonder that is attachment theory and why it's so important to understand in all our important relationships. We talk about why attachment theory differs from other common personality type tests, what it's so crucial to understanding both our own and loved ones' attachment styles for the health of our relationships, what each of the 4 attachment styles is, and how attachment theory impacts our spirituality.Check ou...

In this episode, Heather Thompson Day fulfills her promise, returning to celebrate two answered prayers that she and David spoke about in her first guest appearance (Episode 52). Join Heather and David as they share their testimonies and touch on a range of different topics such as journaling, self-care, the enneagram, impostor syndrome, and her upcoming book "I'll See You Tomorrow".Dr. Heather Thompson Day is an associate professor of communication at Andrews University, with a g...

What does perfectionism mean to you? And what does perfectionistic thinking look like in your day-to-day life? Is it healthy or is there a better way? In this week's episode, Callie and David talk about perfectionism in their lives and explore a more healthy method to grow and mature in excellence. This discussion applies to all parts of life, including relationships.--------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoughts on the podcast! Got any questions, topic suggestions, or just...

In this episode, we conclude our 3-part series on Sexual Trauma with special guest, Dr. Karen Abdool. The courage to confront the difficult and dark parts of our stories comes from the God-given reality that they need not define our present and future. Dr. Karen begins by sharing the various effects of sexual trauma on women and men that often go unnoticed, then goes on to share about her personal journey of healing and recovery, along with how she was able to reconcile God's love for her aft...

[Trigger Warning: sexual abuse, harm, & violence].In this episode, we continue our 3-part series on Sexual Trauma with special guest, Dr. Karen Abdool. where we explore her story of trauma and healing. Join us as we expand our understanding of what constitutes sexual abuse and talk about some common complexities that lead to survivors discounting abuse such as experiencing arousal/pleasure or "freezing" during assault, as opposed to flight (resisting an abuser)00:00 - Defining sexua...

[Trigger Warning: sexual abuse, harm, & violence]. This week marks the beginning of a new 3-part series on Sexual Trauma with special guest, Dr. Karen Abdool, where we explore her story of trauma and healing. In this first episode, Dr. Karen's introduces us to her childhood, describing the context and experiences that shaped her sexual education. She also courageously recounts the events and aftermath of her first sexual assault. Join us as we begin to confront the awfulness that is...

In this episode, we're joined by special guest and clinical psychologist, Dr. Ruth Stephen Koilpillai, for the final episode of our 3-part series discussing therapy/counseling. Join Ruth and David as they talk about Ruth's story, the role & benefits of therapy in helping us thrive from a psychologist's POV, and reconciling therapy & psychology with the Christian faith. It gets deep!Check out our Mental Health book recommendations here! https://docs.google.com/document/d/1dCJxuCG_JHNoM...

In this episode, Callie and David continue a 3-part series discussing therapy/counseling. They pick up continuing to discuss common hesitations that arise when considering therapy and also dive into how you can practically go about finding an affordable counselor or therapist in your area.The 3rd part of the series will be a Q&A with a licensed clinical psychologist, so please pass on your questions, reactions, and thoughts! We want to hear from you, yes you! Submission details are shared...

In this episode, Callie and David begin a 3-part series discussing therapy/counseling. The idea of therapy and counseling may have a unique meaning for you depending on your culture, religious background, and previous experience with therapy or counseling. As you consider what therapy means to you, you are welcome to the table as David and Callie share their own experiences in today's episode and why they believe everyone should consider therapy. They also share a few essential things t...

In today's episode, Callie & David talk about the necessity of confrontation in friendships. Confrontation is often interpreted as being aggressive or negative, but in reality, confronting an issue is all about facing it in a truthful, mature, and respectful way in order to build a closer relationship. However, sometimes it's not our friends we need to confront first, but ourselves. Join the conversation to learn more about navigating this often difficult part of friendships!-------------...

In this episode, Callie and David have a nuanced conversation and share personal experiences about subtle yet common communication patterns that when perpetuated, lead to less connected and intimate friendships. As they address these patterns, they also suggest ways to safely confront our friends about them even though it might bring some discomfort.--------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoughts on the podcast! Got any questions, topic suggestions, or just want to get...

One of the keys to securing a fulfilling relationship is leaving the past where it belongs. But how do you know if the past is actually in the past? We might feel that our partner's past, romantic or otherwise, is something that threatens our current relationship and so we keep dwelling on it, often to our detriment. Join Callie and David as they dive into this topic exploring:The difference between forgiveness and trustHow to know if your partner's past is their presentCommon insecurities we...

In today's episode, we take a break from this season's themes of sex, friendships, and mental health, to talk about the common pressures of a first date that often keep us from going on dates in the first place. We often place so much unnecessary pressure on the initial interaction of a first date such as:expecting that the person has to perfectly meet all our criteria before accepting to meet themthinking that our first date will inform us if we should marry them or notfeeling like we need t...

Modest is hottest, right? For many, modesty has taught us that our worth is on display and that our value is determined by the length, width, and looseness of our clothing. In this episode, we're joined by Dr. Camden Morgante, exploring the harmful basis and impacts of this belief and how true modesty is much more than how much skin you show. Join us as we discuss:the difference between therapy and coachingwhat purity culture recovery looks like5 other toxic cultures related to purity culture...

Studies show that new friendships don't just happen. Believing that friendships happen by luck or circumstance versus believing making friends takes intentionality, evidently impacts your chances of making friends. In this episode, Callie and David explore 4 proven ways to make new friends, while reflecting on examples in their own lives.If you'd like to dive more into learning about friendship, here are some great friendship experts you can follow:Dr. Marisa Franco, IG: @drmarisagfrancoDr. M...

In this episode, we're joined by Andrew Bauman, a licensed mental health counselor, author, and director of the Christian Counseling Center: For Sexual Health & Trauma (CCC) in North Carolina. Drawing on themes from his recent book "The Sexually Healthy Man", join us as we discuss:What it means to be sexually healthyUnderstanding sexual objectification and the pornographic style of relating (PSR)Looking beyond sexual challenges to the wounds and shame in our storiesHow to grieve and...

In today's episode, we're joined by Juliette Sweeney, an author, marriage & sex blogger, and trainee therapist, as we explore the importance of figuring out what unrealized, unexpressed, and unrealistic expectations each of us may have about sex, especially as they relate to our individual experience. Like in previous episodes, we'll uncover some deep-rooted sex myths as well as explore a few tools and mindset shifts to help us have healthier sexual conversations with ourselves and those ...

How do you develop a friendship with your parents as an adult when the primary relationship dynamic in your life has been that of parent-to-child? What about a sibling or cousin that you just don't seem to share any common interests with? Join us in this episode as we zoom in on exploring the fundamentals of building friendships with the unique individuals that we never got to choose yet mean so much to us -- family.--------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoughts on the podc...

Is defining-the-relationship (DTR) only important in a romantic context? Or can it be advantageous for our friendships too? What if your friend is more accurately defined as an acquaintance or something entirely different? In today's episode, Callie and David explore this subject exploring the reasons why categorizing our relationships can prove critical for your wellbeing and others, as well as how to understand which category the people in your life fall into.--------------------------...

In this first episode of the new year, we're joined by Chris Trondsen as he so vulnerably opens up to share his story of living with severe OCD for over a decade, recovering from it, and now helping others navigate their mental health as a therapist and advocate for OCD awareness and education. We learn how the quality of our mental health has a direct impact on the quality of our relationships and why conversations like these need to be had for everyone's benefit. If you might have a mental ...

In this episode, we bring on marriage blogger and award-winning author, Sheila Wray Gregoire to draw back the curtain, revealing the problematic and toxic teachings about sex taught to us growing up and throughout life, especially in church. Based on her book, The Great Sex Rescue, she shares how a groundbreaking in-depth survey of 22,000 Christian women reveals that generations of women have grown up with books and messages about sex that make them feel dirty, used, or invisible,...

For some of us, the holidays are an opportunity for quality time with close family and friends yet for many, the holidays and interactions thereof trigger mixed and often negative emotions; anxiety, anger, fear, sadness, grief, or loss. In this episode, Callie and David take time to acknowledge the difficulties of the holiday season and share 3 ways to help navigate difficult yet often necessary interactions. ALSO, listen till the end to receive a special CHristmas gift from both o...

Expressing love through sexual intimacy is a special way to be vulnerable and affectionate in a romantic relationship; however, it's not always the most intimate way to express love. If a relationship feels disconnected despite a healthy sex life, there are actually several other ways to experience intimacy. In today's episode, Mary Jo Rapini presents these other forms of intimacy, sharing from her wealth of experience as a psychotherapist, specializing in sex therapy and intimacy. Join us as...

We live in a globalized and connected world yet many of us struggle to reach outside of our own cultural bubbles and form real relationships that move beyond stereotypes and lead to understanding, healing, and solidarity across cultural lines. Even in shared multi-ethnic spaces like churches, schools, and workplaces where we may feel diverse, we must remember that multiethnicity does not equate to multiculturalism. In this episode, Michelle Ami Reyes takes us on a journey on how to look close...

In today's episode, we're joined by the wise Kelly Needham as she reminds us that we're called to more than halfhearted friendships and lukewarm connections. Sharing principles and personal stories detailed in her book, Friend-ish, we take an honest and closer look at what the tenor of Scripture says about the gift of friendship and what this practically means for us. Join us as we explore:Healthy vs unhealthy attachment in friendshipsThe first step to making friends in a new place/stag...

The psychologist, Dan Allender once wrote "if we don’t tell our stories, our stories will tell us. Our stories impact us either unconsciously or consciously. It’s up to us to decide whether we’ll be passive recipients or active agents in the shaping of our lives.” In this episode, we have none other than the king of chai & storytelling, @crossculturechristian, Kevin Wilson, to help us learn how we can explore, own, and honor our individual stories. As he shares reflections on his st...

In this episode, David now interviews Callie about her journey with sex. She reflects on her range of sources for sex education — from Planned Parenthood to married friends — and the value she's gained from each. Callie also shares how she navigated her insecurities regarding David's sexual history, as well as dealing with the guilt and shame of crossing boundaries in their relationship (and how to see it in its proper context). Not only is there much more, there's also plenty of jokes. You k...

In this episode, Callie interviews David about his journey with sex. Beginning from childhood, he shares up through their current relationship as a married couple. Reflecting on experiences, emotions, and beliefs, David's story shows how we can't ignore our sexual past, present, and future. Vulnerability, honesty, and especially compassion are all necessary for healing and growth — especially in the realm of sex. --------------------------------We're eager to hear your though...

Food. It's something we all have in common, the world over must eat to live. Yet our food choices, habits, and preferences often tell a deeper and more complex story. In this episode, Dr. Margaret Nagib, a clinical psychologist specializing in treating eating disorders, takes us on a journey to understand how to assess our relationship with food and why it's crucial to do so for our well-being and the well-being of loved ones around us. Essentially, if you eat food, then this episode is...

Quality friendships are a necessity for our well being yet it is no secret that friendships can be one of the most difficult areas to navigate as adults. This episode marks the beginning of a journey to discover how we can build and maintain thriving adult friendships. Before learning what comprises healthy adult friendships, we thought it wise to first address common misconceptions we have about them. Join us as we unpack 6 myths about adult friendships and how confronting these myths h...

What do you do when it seems like everybody else is getting their breakthrough but you’re not? What is one important thing you're currently waiting on for life to get better? Join our conversation with Dr. Heather Thompson Day, author of "It's Not Your Turn", as she shares what we can do to shape ourselves while waiting, so we are ready when it's our turn. So much wisdom for every single situation of life in this episode! If you enjoy it, please share the love with a friend and check out Dr. ...

Welcome to season 2 of the podcast! We missed you!In this episode, we introduce the exciting themes to look forward to this season and interview each other about our struggles, growth and supporting each other as a couple over the past year. We hope you'll be inspired to have similar conversations in your own relationships, romantic or not, as well as resonate with some of our reflections!--------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoughts on the podcast! Got any questions, topi...

On this final episode of this (50-episode) season, we share our proposal story. Every proposal story is unique and beautiful and we're honored to share some of the hurdles crossed and milestones attained that led us to engagement, including:Why we "delayed" our engagement plans because of familyA secret to the perfect proposalWhy David's proposal plans were shut downHow Callie almost busted the proposal set-up and who saved the day--------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoug...

We can't believe it's almost been a year since we launched the podcast! We've been privileged to have a total of 15 guests interview with us and I (David) wanted to share with you the top 10 lessons that I've learned from them in this first solo episode!If you're new to the podcast, this is a great episode to help guide you on what episodes you might be interested in. And if you've been part of this community for a while, we're super curious to know what top lessons you've learned from our gu...

In this episode, we're finally addressing heartbreak, a topic frequently requested over private emails and messages. Whether from a mutual break-up, betrayal, rejection, or something else, heartbreak in romantic relationships happens and it hurts a lot. Why does it hurt so bad and how can we move on and heal? Join us as we share a few of our personal heartbreak experiences as well as tried-and-true advice to help you or a friend on the path towards healing.--------------------------------We'r...

In this episode, we're honored to have Shirin Peykar, LMFT sit down with us to talk about identifying and dealing with a narcissist, particularly in the context of romantic relationships. Deriving from her 10 years of experience helping survivors of narcissistic abuse, as well as her own past experience, having been married to a narcissist, we learned so much from this conversation and trust you will too. Join us as we discuss:What is Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) and are all narcis...

Decades of studies, by the Gottman Institute, reveal that the #1 killer of relationships is rejecting a loved one's appeals for connection. In today's episode, we dive deep into how we at times, knowingly or unknowingly, find ourselves doing so by:1) discrediting their needs,2) discrediting their autonomy, and 3) discrediting their characterMore importantly, how can we respond more lovingly to appeals for connection, even if we feel threatened or attacked by them? Because oftentimes, we...

In this episode, we're honored to sit with pastor, therapist-in-training, and author, Edsel Cadet, as he opens up and shares about:his journey integrating mental health into his spirituality and how you can toowhy it's not enough for you or your partner to "love the Lord"why he co-authored the book, "Still Thirsty" on healing & sexual fulfillment, and how we can change conversations on sex in churchhis love story and unique take on how to know if the person you're dating is "t...

You've probably seen at least one of those cringeworthy "Top Marriage Proposal Rejections" videos and like us, you may, or may not, be wondering "How did they not see this coming?!". In today's episode, we talk about why we believe pre-engagement counseling is much more important than pre-marital counseling (though both are important!) coupled with the need for more open, honest, and regular conversations about marriage long before the proposal, especially if marriage is the end goal. Join us...

In this episode, we talk about a complicated emotion common to all of us: guilt. As moral beings, guilt signals to us of a wrong course taken so we can redirect our steps in the right path. However, more often than not guilt is used as a form of manipulation (the guilt trip), and is too frequently a destructive primary driver of our behavior. We realized that how you handle guilt can either lead you to life and happiness or lead you away from it. Join as we address:What is the guilt trip and ...

Studies show that social rejection activates the same pain pathways in the brain as physical pain. This might help explain the hurtful experience of being ghosted: when someone terminates a relationship by ending communication abruptly and without explanation. A recurring phenomenon in the internet age, join us as we dig in to understand:What is ghosting and why it differs from silent treatment/stonewalling?Why it hurts so much?What are common reasons people ghost and how can we avoid g...

In this episode, we take a walk down memory lane to reflect on why we made a decision not to say "I Love You" to each other until we were engaged, after 3 years of dating. We want to emphasize that this wasn't a rule but a choice we made. Join us as we recall the conversation we had that led to the decision, our reasoning behind it, how it impacted our relationship, and the "accidental" time David splurted the 3 magical words. --------------------------------We're eager to hear your thou...

In today's episode, we delve into why all lasting and meaningful relationships in life are founded on trust, however, in pursuit of this ideal, we found ourselves trusting too little and/or trusting too much. Join us as we share our personal "trust issues" as well as:Reasons why we trust too little or too muchWhy love doesn't always equate to trust Why it's easier to break trust than to build it4 proven ways to test if someone trustworthy and to build trust in your relationships---------...

In today's episode, we celebrate the holiday by focusing on the relationship that transcends all other relationships that we usually talk about on this podcast. How do we practically frame and approach our relationship with God in the context of our core human relationships, especially our romantic ones? We explore this as well as share 7 guiding principles to help you and a loved one(s) spend meaningful, enjoyable, and consistent time with God together.--------------------------------We're e...

In this episode, we talk about a little-understood trait that is found in 15-20% of people, including Callie. Highly Sensitive People (HSPs) are essentially people that experience the world in high definition. However, HSPs have often been misinterpreted and mistaken for having certain disorders or illnesses. Join us as we recount our shocking discovery that Callie was an HSP as well as:Why her HSP trait explains why Callie requires more sleep, finds good or bad change upsetting, and experien...

In this episode, we're joined by Jacent Wamala, a licensed marriage, and family therapist (LMFT) and money mindset coach, as she shares the critical intersection between money and relationships. Having paid off over $90,000 of debt in under two years while dating and now married, she provides some valuable gems on how to get our money mindset right first as individuals before doing so in our relationships. Join us as we also discuss the following:What to do when therapy doesn't workWhy is mon...

In this episode, we decided to celebrate, our dog, Everest's one-year anniversary as a new family member by sharing 3 crucial life lessons having her has taught us. We hope that you'll be able to apply these lessons to yourself as well as your relationships. Even if you're not an animal person (fun fact: Callie actually isn't one!), we believe you'll find this episode valuable. Enjoy!--------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoughts on the podcast! Got any questions, top...

This is the final episode in our 5 part series on Dating Essentials — 5 foundational principles for meaningful and fulfilling dating relationships.In our final episode of the series, we’re honored to bring back Sebastien Braxton to discuss the role and significance of boundaries, particularly physical boundaries, during dating. We also address frequently asked questions surrounding this topic, including:If you love your partner and are committed to them, what's the big deal regarding limiting...

This is the 4th episode in our 5 part series on Dating Essentials — 5 foundational principles for meaningful and fulfilling dating relationships.In this penultimate episode, we examine why successful dating typically takes time. But that begs the question, how much time? Is there a recommended minimum or suggested range? A number of months or a couple of years? Well, it depends. Join us as we dive into the 5 C's (Character, Competency, Chemistry, Culture, and Compatibility) that act as time m...

This is the 3rd part in our series on Dating Essentials — 5 foundational principles for meaningful and fulfilling dating relationships.In this episode, we delve into why accountability is such a crucial element in relationships, especially in dating. We always want to ensure that our most impactful relationships reflect the values that are most important to us. Yet often, emotional attachment, though not wrong in and of itself, can hinder our ability to discern and decipher clearly. Tha...

This is the 2nd part in our series on Dating Essentials — 5 foundational principles for meaningful and fulfilling dating relationships. In this episode, we challenge the myth that romantic relationships are necessary to be complete, whole, and happy in life. Many of us may agree that we are indeed complete in spite of a romantic relationship but do we actually believe it? Do we actually live it? Join us as we discuss this and explore how walking in the areas of spiritual, emotional, and ...

This is the beginning of our series on Dating Essentials — 5 foundational principles for meaningful and fulfilling dating relationships.In this episode, we begin by laying the foundation with purpose. Why are you dating? Or Why are you trying to date? Oftentimes, we can give a lofty, well-articulated answer. But is this our actual purpose? What are the attributes of a good purpose? Join us as we also discuss:How we define dating in a practical wayCommon unfulfilling purposes that guide ...

For some of us, date night - a planned occasion when you and your significant other spend 1-on-1 time cultivating emotional closeness through an activity - feels like a no-sweat reflex action. For others, it’s a nice-to-have but not a must-have. And for many, they often sense the need but find themselves battling with several barriers such as:I can’t find the timeI’m just too exhaustedI can’t think of any cheap or creative ideas! All the planning is too muchWhat about the kids? Th...

"Life is at best a chain of transitions, that is we are either going to, going through, or coming out of a transition."In this episode, we sat down with the wise Jackson Saya, a former zoologist, and current life transition coach, who shares how parasites-the masters of transitions in nature -provide us with the keys to navigate change in our relationships. With these principles, we learn how our relationships can thrive in the midst of change, instead of just surviving. Join us as we d...

In this episode, we discuss a question often floated by listeners and that is, is online dating okay? Doesn’t it seem unnatural and inauthentic? Isn't it forced and where does God’s will in waiting for a partner come into play? Join us as we address some of these common hesitations as well as:Potential benefits of online datingPotential risks of online dating Principles for healthy online datingAs always, we’d love to hear your comments, thoughts, questions, and topic suggestions via Ins...

In this episode, we delve into the realm of assumptions within relationships — accepting things regarding a person as true without proof. Living in the unverified reality of assumptions is often a source of grief and heartache; but we don't have to live there. Some examples of possible assumptions may be:She didn’t call me last night, so she's clearly not interestedHe may seem rude and dismissive often times but I know he loves meThey didn’t compliment my new outfit so they obvious...

“They say distance means so little when someone means so much. But still, somehow distance has this ability to break bonds, to break trust, to push us further away from each other not just physically but emotionally”On our first podcast of the year, we’re honored to share a recent conversation with one of our favorite couples, Jonathan and Amanda Walter. Long distance - across multiple timezones - has been a defining aspect of both our relationships and is only becoming more common in our glo...

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!As many around the world celebrate the hope and joy that Christ's birth brings, we decided to focus on a key relationship that surrounded His birth: Joseph and Mary, His earthly parents. Join us as we reflect on the oft-overlooked details of the early stages of this relationship; then, as we explore 3 resulting lessons we can bring into our own relationships from the biblical narrative.--------------------------------We're eager to hear your thoughts on the ...