Glaswegians Anonymous

Darren Connell and Gary Faulds are back for Episode 57, and this week’s chat goes everywhere from Hollywood crushes to handling gig complaints. Gary opens up about the heartfelt feedback he’s received since discussing his dad's passing, and the boys break down their future travel plans and tattoo choices.

In this episode, we cover:

Tattoos & Thirst Traps: Darren shows off his new ink and latest thirst traps, while Gary breaks down his own tattoo collection.

The Tom Hardy Appeal: Why both the boys agree they fancy Tom Hardy.

Punter Complaints: Dealing with audience complaints, black pudding debates, and how ChatGPT fits into the mix.

Deep Chats & Feedback: Gary discusses the overwhelming response and feedback he’s had after talking about his dad’s death on the pod.

TV & Film: Darren tries to convince everyone to watch Howard the Duck, while Gary vents about the agony of waiting a week for new episodes of Mobland.

Live Gigs & Guests: Thoughts on Obama live at the Hydro, discovering new music, and David’s recent podcast guest.

Travels & Treks: Gary reveals his big travel plans for January 2027.

Star Trek Endorsement: Celebrating the fact that Scotty from Star Trek actually dropped a comment on the podcast.

Listen and Subscribe:Make sure to like, subscribe, and leave a comment below—let us know your thoughts on Howard the Duck or if you agree with the boys about Tom Hardy!

Gary and Darren are back for another brilliantly chaotic week. From existential dread to wildlife combat, Episode 56 goes completely off the rails. The boys are gearing up for an upcoming show up in Stornoway, which means Darren is already panicking about surviving the tiny plane ride—though he is finally getting to visit his bucket list beach (with a serious twist).Meanwhile, Gary gets shockingly deep about his death anxiety before pivoting entirely to his bizarre TikTok live algorithm journey, his hunt for a phone addicts support group, and his tactical use of Arabic to secure extra meat at local kebab shops. Add in a debate on 3D-printed steaks and a breakdown of the ultimate Glasgow slaggings, and it's a classic episode.

In this episode:

* The absolute best Glasgow slaggings & how the boys would roast each other.

* Stornoway bound: Darren’s small plane terror and his twisted bucket list beach trip.* Going deep on Gary’s death anxiety.

* Animal warfare: A man gets attacked by an emu, and the guys debate which animals they could take in a fight.

* The weird reality of 3D printing meat.

* Gary’s descent into the dark depths of the TikTok live algorithm.

* Does Gary need an intervention for his phone addiction?

* The ultimate life hack: Gary speaking Arabic in the kebab shop for larger portions.

Make sure to subscribe, leave a review, and drop a comment letting us know which animal you reckon you could take in a fight!

Gary Faulds and Darren Connell are back in the studio for Episode 55, bringing the usual chaos, questionable life choices, and top-tier Glasgow patter. This week, we debrief on Darren's special and find out what his next moves are, while Gary explains why he’s turned up wearing his dad's brown brogues.

From obscure movie references nobody understands to Darren’s hunt for a "Japanese guzzler," this episode goes everywhere. We also tackle the latest local news, including the 4 Corners dispersal order and the monumental 25th anniversary of the Glasgow IKEA, before getting into some serious chat about recent events in Belfast.

In this episode, we cover:

The review of Darren’s special and his future plans

Gary wearing his dad’s brown brogues

Darren’s obscure movie references

The search for a Japanese guzzler

The 4 Corners dispersal order & 25 years of Glasgow IKEA

Gary’s lifelong ambition to end up in The Digger

Why Gary is fully prepared to do jail time to clear his tax bill

Having a "good relapse" in the scheme and taking tic off a snack van

Darren taking Gary to Overeaters Anonymous (and Gary taking notes)

Gary’s latest culinary creation: putting body chocolate on toast

Make sure to like, subscribe, and drop a comment below letting us know your favorite moment from this week's episode.

Listen on Spotify and Apple Podcasts, and follow us on socials for clips and updates!

Welcome back to another episode of Glaswegians Anonymous! This week, Darren and Gary are going full doomsday prep, but with a distinctly Glasgow twist. From surviving the apocalypse to questionable herbal medicine, the lads are tackling the heavy-hitting issues.In this episode, we cover:

Nuclear Glasgow: Gary gives his ultimate survival guide for a nuclear bomb hitting the city (and explains exactly why eating his dad would give him gout).The Chinese Herbalist: Darren’s recent trip for alternative medicine where he might have walked away with a bit more than he paid for.Eurovision: Who would be the ultimate Scottish contestant to take the Eurovision stage?Caffeine Updates: Gary discovers the Espresso Bon Bon and it changes everything.The Digital Detox: Why the boys are ready to chuck their smartphones in the Clyde and go back to old-school flip phones.

Doomsday Cinema: If you had to rebuild society, what 3 movies are you taking to the new world?Radioactive Superpowers: What post-apocalyptic mutations the boys are actively hoping for.Tattoo Talk: Darren outlines his plans for some new ink, while Gary pitches his ultimate "conspiracy theory" sleeve.Geriatric Politicians: Asking the real questions—should there be a strict age limit for world leaders?Equestrian Cops: Seriously, why do the police still have horses?

👇 Get involved in the comments:What 3 movies are you taking to the new world? Let us know below!Don't forget to LIKE, SUBSCRIBE, and hit the BELL icon so you never miss an episode! And Please hit that hype!Follow us on socials:Instagram: @GlaswegiansAnonymousTikTok: @GlaswegiansAnonymous

#GlaswegiansAnonymous #Glasgow #ScottishPodcast #ScottishComedy #NuclearFallout #Eurovision #ConspiracyTheories #PodcastRecommendations

Gary Faulds and Darren Connell are back for Episode 53, bringing the usual chaotic mix of Glasgow banter, football debates, and highly questionable life choices.

This week, Gary tries his best to stay humble about Rangers winning, while the boys discuss Oasis playing Celtic Park and whether Darren would ever set foot in Ibrox for a gig. We also dive into some deep movie analysis as Gary tries to figure out Shutter Island, and things get personal when Darren shares a stalker message from a fan who spotted him in the wild.

Later, it's a deep dive into health and fitness—from taking pre-workout to Darren getting absolutely roasted for a chaotic lunch of eggs, sardines, and pickles (and the concerning flatulence that followed). Plus, Gary’s love for Catholic Mass, Darren learning The Sash, their worst-ever moments dying on stage, and the ultimate hypothetical: how would they renovate M&D’s with a billion pounds?In this episode:

Gary being humble about Rangers winning

Oasis playing at Celtic Park for Noel’s 60th

Would Darren go to a gig at Ibrox?

Gary tries to figure out Shutter Island

Darren’s Uncle Gerry’s mental health

The boys talk pre-workout

Gary’s love for Catholic Mass & Darren learns The Sash

Celtic vs. Rangers: Which past players would they want back?Gary roasts Darren’s plate (eggs, sardines, and pickles)

The concerning farts off the back of Darren's lunch

Darren goes over his daily diet

Stand-up horror stories: The worst time dying on stage

Billion-pound budget: Renovating M&D’s Scotland's Theme Park

🔗 Connect with the Boys & See Them Live! Darren's Linktree: https://linktr.ee/darrenconnellcomedian?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio&fbclid=PAdGRleAUQhVNwZG9mAmZkaWQWUOOKZPNKfAdg3_CSWhHXLLn4oh_PQ2V4dG4DYWVtATEAc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQPMTI0MDI0NTc0Mjg3NDE0AAGnFyPZwYdXU1rLZdd_yZkn129sCRIEjyI118w0hdOmivfcw539Lq0xaadLAVI_aem_F8_ZAlxoKVVlxKO5CHwB2A

Gary's Linktree: https://punchlinepromotions.co.uk/gary-faulds-tickets/?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio&fbclid=PAdGRleAUQhUBwZG9mAmZkaWQWUOPMVTVXcxc7SERktorGWHRwpAQ-nGV4dG4DYWVtAjExAHNydGMGYXBwX2lkDzEyNDAyNDU3NDI4NzQxNAABp1wtaMJBK_hKBxAusEcZ_G_ONzj5I7Yy23s1JdmLhsJajak6hWwsOrnvUiyP_aem_BgKx32Jz80ohL3Ewp6l-kA

Welcome back to another chaotic episode of Glaswegians Anonymous!

This week, Darren and Gary are diving headfirst into the madness with some of the most unhinged chat and revelations yet. From royal intruders to unexpected family trees, nothing is off limits.In this episode, the boys get into:

The Ultimate Question: Would Gary pump Darren?True Crime Confessions: Who takes the top spot as their favourite serial killer?

Social Media Antics: We dissect Darren’s shameless social media thirst traps.

Digital Detox: Could the boys actually survive without their phones for a full year?

Military Material: Would Darren step up and join the army if he got called up? (Plus, Gary breaks down his absolute favourite army rations).

Criminal Connections: Gary reveals he’s apparently the 7th twice-removed cousin of Bonnie from Bonnie & Clyde.

Undercover Operations: Would Gary risk going to a Celtic game in disguise?

Written in the Stars: The boys check their star signs for the day—do their horoscopes prove they’re a perfect match?

Drop a comment to let us know if you could survive a year without your phone, and make sure to subscribe so you never miss an episode!

🔗 Connect with the Boys & See Them Live!

Darren's Linktree: https://linktr.ee/darrenconnellcomedian?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio&fbclid=PAdGRleAUQhVNwZG9mAmZkaWQWUOOKZPNKfAdg3_CSWhHXLLn4oh_PQ2V4dG4DYWVtATEAc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQPMTI0MDI0NTc0Mjg3NDE0AAGnFyPZwYdXU1rLZdd_yZkn129sCRIEjyI118w0hdOmivfcw539Lq0xaadLAVI_aem_F8_ZAlxoKVVlxKO5CHwB2A

Gary's Linktree: https://punchlinepromotions.co.uk/gary-faulds-tickets/?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio&fbclid=PAdGRleAUQhUBwZG9mAmZkaWQWUOPMVTVXcxc7SERktorGWHRwpAQ-nGV4dG4DYWVtAjExAHNydGMGYXBwX2lkDzEyNDAyNDU3NDI4NzQxNAABp1wtaMJBK_hKBxAusEcZ_G_ONzj5I7Yy23s1JdmLhsJajak6hWwsOrnvUiyP_aem_BgKx32Jz80ohL3Ewp6l-kA

The boys are back! After a brief (and dramatic) break up, Darren and Gary have reunited because, let’s be honest, ending the podcast at the Edinburgh Fringe live show would have been far too embarrassing.In this chaotic 51st episode, the lads recap their Fringe live show and cover everything from morning TV nostalgia to international terrorism. September is officially here, which means Gary is thriving in his autumn era and dragging Darren down a rabbit hole of 9/11 conspiracies and questionable Bin Laden history (spoiler: Pakistan didn’t hide him). Congratulations to the podcast for officially making an FBI watchlist.Also in this episode: The Billy Moore Experience: Darren talks about his encounter and the ensuing press coverage. RIP Dolly: The boys mourn the "passing" of Dolly Parton, with Darren making his physical intentions crystal clear. The Ultimate Dilemma: Who would you rather pump—Si Ferry or Slanny? Scandals & Gigs: A deep dive into the Who Wants to Be a Millionaire coughing scam, plus Gary recounts a wildly surreal gig with Mr. Blobby. Medical Marvels: Gary shares the grim and horrifying tale of the "infected belly button tap." Political Crushes: Gary confesses his undying love for "PM" Andy Burnham.Upcoming Live Shows!Tickets are officially on sale for the December live shows in Glasgow and Dundee. Grab yours before they sell out!https://www.garyfaulds.co.uk/

Welcome to a massive milestone—Episode 50 of Glaswegians Anonymous! We’ve hit the big five-0, and the patter is as chaotic as ever.

As you can probably guess from the title, "Every Fart's a Fear", we're in top form this week.

We kick things off with Gary issuing a formal (well, sort of) apology for his ADHD completely taking over the "Two Diddies" episode.

With the 2026 Glasgow Commonwealth Games officially launching this week, the boys get to thinking: what exactly should go into the official "Glasgow Welcome Pack" for visiting athletes?

Plus, we talk swally and scran. Darren goes on a legendary rant about his absolute hatred for IPAs, we ask if anyone has actually survived a can of Super Lager, and we finally get to the bottom of Darren’s infamous "Omelette Gate" at the China Sea.

Gary also drops his recommendation for the best Indian in the city.For the tourists (and the locals), we review Glasgow's top TripAdvisor attractions, share our own personal top tier things to do, and discuss our favourite things about the city's two footballing cathedrals: Celtic Park and Ibrox. Finally, we pull back the curtain on the comedy scene to talk about drinking before gigs, and reminisce about the traditional Glasgow method for teaching weans how to swim... just chuck 'em straight in the deep end!

SUPPORT THE PODCAST:

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Welcome back to another absolute belter of an episode! This week on Glaswegians Anonymous, Darren is joined by the absolute legends themselves, The Two Diddies.

Fair warning: the energy in this room is completely off the charts. Get ready for a massive catch-up packed with pure chaos, heavy banter, and an ending you won't want to miss.

🎙️ In This Episode, We Cover:

The Origin Story: How the boys actually met and became the duo you know and love.

The Weight Loss Debate: Honest opinions and no-nonsense chat about weight loss drugs, modern methods, and what actually works.

The New Gym: Exclusive chat about the grand opening of their brand-new gym—what to expect and how they built it.

Glasgow Grub: The ultimate guide to their absolute favourite places to eat in the city.

The Breaking Point: You need to stick around for the end. Watch poor Darren finally snap as the collective ADHD takes over, resulting in a glorious shouting match where absolutely nobody can get a single word in edgeways.

🔗 Connect With Us

Subscribe to the channel so you never miss an episode, and smash that like button if you enjoyed the chaos! Let us know in the comments if you think Darren needs a holiday after this one.

Subscribe To Our Patreon: patreon.com/glaswegiansanonymous

Follow The Two Diddies: instagram.com/twodiddiespodcast

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Listen on the go:Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and everywhere else you get your podcasts!

#GlaswegiansAnonymous #TheTwoDiddies #Glasgow #GlasgowPodcast #ADHD #GymOpening #ScottishBanter #DarrenLosesIt

Gary and Darren are back in the hot seats for Episode 48, bringing you another essential dose of top-tier Glasgow banter and completely unsolicited opinions.

This week, the boys dive into the usual rundown of the week’s madness, get derailed by a few guaranteed tangents, and finally explain the hilarious (and slightly concerning) context behind this week's belter of an episode title, "If scant your dead body."

Whether they're navigating local grievances, dissecting absolute nonsense, or just trying to survive the week, Gary and Darren have got it covered.

Grab a brew, stick your headphones on, and get involved.

Listen and follow:

 Make sure to subscribe so you never miss an episode.

 Got a story or a question for the boys? Drop us a comment or reach out on our socials!

 If you're enjoying the pod, leave us a rating and a review—it massively helps the show

The lost Patreon tape from May has finally escaped the vault!

Because Producer Paul absolutely fucked the schedule and went on holiday, we are dropping this absolute madness into the main feed. If you think the standard episodes are wild, the Patreon specials are on a completely different level of mental.

In this episode:

* The ultimate audio mix-up: Darren explains how he accidentally watched food porn with gay porn audio blasting over it.

* Cult leader Gary: Gary officially expresses his deep love of cults and what it would take to get him to join one.

* The Japanese restaurant incident: Gary deliberately triggers Darren’s autism in public.

* Peter Powers hypnosis: Gary recalls watching his aunty doing something very special on stage at a hypnosis show.

* Mind control: The boys discuss exactly what they would make each other do if they had the power of hypnosis.

* Family support: Darren reveals his mentally ill uncle’s brutal take on his stand-up comedy career.

* Title Weekend: A little throwback to that massive weekend in May when this was originally recorded.

Support the Show

Want more of this unfiltered chaos every single week? Get access to exclusive bonus episodes, early access, and secret content by joining the inner circle.

👉 Sign up now: patreon.com/glaswegiansanonymous

Lock in for a massive episode as the boys sit down with Glasgow’s own DJ and comedian, Mikey Motion, for a wild, hilarious, and unexpectedly deep conversation that covers absolutely everything.Things kick off with some utterly chaotic takes as Mikey drops a bold, highly controversial claim about putting Indian curry on pizzas (yes, really). From there, the filters are completely off as the guys dive into life’s vices, the truth about semen retention, a hilarious confession about how Mikey *actually* uses AI, and a nostalgic trip down memory lane discussing "old school wanks."We also dive deep into the **DJ Chronicles**, tracking Mikey's musical journey: * How he first got behind the decks and his early DJ history * His absolute favourite styles of music to play * The standout, favourite gigs of his career so far * What it's like becoming genuine friends with the musical heroes he grew up looking up toThen things got deep...It’s not all madness, though. The conversation takes a poignant turn as Mikey opens up about the reality of turning 40, his personal battles with anxiety, and the mindset shift required to move past it and truly love the life he’s built.**Don't miss the finish:** Make sure you listen right until the very end to hear Mikey’s absolutely mental holiday story, followed by an inspirational closing speech you won't want to miss.Watch, listen, and subscribe!Buy tickets to our next live show in Edinburgh:https://punchlinepromotions.co.uk/event/glaswegians-anonymous-live-in-edinburgh/?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio&fbclid=PAdGRleASzsu9wZG9mAmV4dG4DYWVtAjExAHNydGMGYXBwX2lkDzEyNDAyNDU3NDI4NzQxNAABp2Cx3HlhCw1ECNlEUjIj8TDY4tlRpRZSidcpxOj4__bc6AA03J-8hHxwB-1e_aem_4ID800BNAMxmFXLiEXGLRg

Live from a packed-out SEC Glasgow! The boys are taking the stage for our biggest, wildest live show yet, and we are joined by the absolute legend that is Kevin Brannigan (AKA the one and only Big Angie)!

We’re diving deep into the chaos right from the curtain-raiser. Darren kicks things off by finally breaking his legendary 8-month dry spell the literal night before the show (pleasure responsibly, folks), before we jet off to his traumatizing tales from the Amsterdam Blue Light District. Meanwhile, Gary takes us down memory lane to the time he got caught red-handed taking a hash bucket in school.

Our brilliant guest Kevin opens up about what it was really like growing up gay in Glasgow's East End, his "alleged" gang days with the Barrowfield fleet, and the time he got absolutely battered with a flip-flop for knocking back his ex. We also chat about his incredible Big Angie community tours bringing laughs back to the schemes.

Also in this episode:

Scheme Nostalgia: The mental games we used to play on the streets back in the day.

Dream vs. Reality: What we actually wanted to be when we grew up versus the absolute worst jobs we ever had (Darren’s hell as a tiler’s apprentice and Gary’s stint as a Queen’s Guard).

The Ultimate Question: What would we strictly not do for £1,000,000?

Wrestling & Weird Sex: Gary’s ICW madness and Darren’s questionable decision to dress up as Bobby for some bedroom roleplay.

Warning: Contains high-voltage Glaswegian patter, explicit confessions, and zero filters.Watch, listen, and subscribe! Let us know in the comments: What wouldn't YOU do for a million quid?

The big news is finally out, people! Darren and Gary are officially moving in together. What could possibly go wrong? Darren’s already planning on installing surveillance, so we’re placing bets now on who completely cracks up first.Before the domestic bliss (or chaos) begins, the boys are tackling the hard-hitting issues: * Glasgow's New Look: Why we need to bin the current city layout and just model Glasgow entirely on Boston. * The Tartan Army Takes America: Visualising the absolute carnage of Scotland vs. Haiti, and the Tartan Army taking over the streets of Boston. * Two-Wheeled Terror: The absolute menace of cutting about Glasgow on electric bikes. * Battering into Grannies: (Exactly what it sounds like, pure chaos).Plus, Darren gives a wee recap of his latest comedy gig and shares a mental health update—thankfully, his sanity is officially on the mend after the trauma of Banger-gate. To settle a debate, Darren rings up his cousin—and British Featherweight Champion—Nathaniel Collins, to get the definitive answer on who would actually win in a street fight.And finally, Gary takes us down memory lane with a brutal confession about his first DVD release. Turns out, he accidentally signed the plastic shrink wrap instead of the actual cover... 500 times.Standard mental behaviour from start to finish. Tune in!Listen now on all major platforms. Don't forget to subscribe, leave a review, and let us know in the comments who is moving out first!

🎟️ LIVE SHOW TICKETS

Don't let Darren relapse. Grab your tickets for the second Glasgow live show on June 20th before they are completely gone!👉 https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

💛 SUPPORT THE PODCAST ON PATREON

For exclusive bonus content, early access, and to keep the lights on, support us on Patreon:👉 patreon.com/glaswegiansanonymous

Don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave a 5-star review.

🚨 THE BIG ONE IS ALMOST HERE! 🚨The boys are back and desperation has officially set in. We need absolutely every single one of you to buy tickets to the SECOND live show in Glasgow on June 20th. Seriously. Buy a ticket, or Darren might actually push the big red button.

In this episode, the lads attempt the impossible: trying to formulate a "family-friendly" podcast. Naturally, that immediately devolves into:

Urinal Etiquette: Gary gets caught taking a cheeky glance at Darren’s local scenery.

Burger Desperation: Darren explains exactly what he'd do for a premium burger (warning: it involves turbo Gluck Gluck).

Milestones: Darren managed to save his lives for the first time in 7 months.

Gig Talk: Gary breaks down his recent gig in Kilbarchan and the boys debate the soul of small, intimate venues versus corporate, commercial spaces.

Matchday Madness: Darren’s chaotic drinking habits at the football, and the absolute mutants in the stands who think it's acceptable to scream at elite, peak-fitness athletes for being "fat."

The Target Weight: The guys reveal their ultimate goal weights (and how realistic they actually are).

Fake News: Darren is entirely convinced that T-Bone steaks are still legally banned in Scotland because of Mad Cow Disease. Spoiler alert: they aren't, Darren.

The Final Frontier: A deeply unsettling pitch for Gary and Darren to visit a nudist beach, leading directly into Darren’s inevitable career pivot into the adult film industry.

It's chaotic, it's completely unhinged, and it is definitely not family-friendly.

🎟️ LIVE SHOW TICKETSDon't let Darren relapse. Grab your tickets for the second Glasgow live show on June 20th before they are completely gone!👉https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

💛 SUPPORT THE PODCAST ON PATREON For exclusive bonus content, early access, and to keep the lights on, support us on Patreon:👉

patreon.com/glaswegiansanonymous

Don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave a 5-star review if you want to see Darren's debut adult film.

In this week's episode, the boys trade the familiar cobbles of Glasgow for a chaotic "jolly" down to Liverpool. From getting unceremoniously rejected by a local Vietnamese restaurant to debating the finer points of restaurant etiquette, it’s a masterclass in how not to be a tourist.This week’s madness includes: Liverpool Diaries: A deep dive into the travel experience (and the unique sensory challenges of being confined in a car with each other), a comparison of Liverpool vs. Glasgow "Jackies," and Gary subjecting Darren to an impromptu, high-volume wedding band listening party. Production Chronicles: The boys discuss the heat—both the temperature in The Green Room Podcast studio and the feedback from their recent Sunday night shows at Blackfriars. Ink & Consequences: An uncomfortable investigation into why they both have tattoos on their backsides, followed by a pivot to far more important life-or-death decisions: their ultimate death row meals. Prison & Planning: If the law finally caught up with them, what would a stint behind bars together actually look like? Plus, they sit down to scheme up exactly how the Patreon cash is getting spent. Vegas Vows: The long-awaited, semi-tragic story of that one time Gary almost walked down the aisle in Las Vegas.Strap in—it’s another classic.

Support the Show:👉 Grab the Merch: https://glaswegians-anonymous-march.bigcartel.com

🎙️ live show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

Patreon: patreon.com/glaswegiansanonymous

Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and hit the bell for all the latest episodes of Glaswegians Anonymous!#GlaswegiansAnonymous #GlasgowPodcast #Mounjaro #Asda #SummerHolidays #ScottishComedy #GlasgowPatter

The boys are back in the Studio for a chaotic catch-up! This week, the conversation takes a turn into the absurd as Gary reveals he’s back on the Mounjaro journey—and we’re not just talking about the weight loss. Somehow, the chat spirals from pharmacy visits to the baffling discovery that Asda is now effectively a medical hub.Also on the agenda: summer holiday planning. From the stress of booking to the inevitable dread of the "family getaway," Gary and Darren break down the reality of trying to get away from it all without losing their minds.Expect the usual blend of Glaswegian patter, unfiltered opinions, and questionable life advice.In this episode: The Mounjaro update: Gary’s latest experiences. The Asda pharmacy rabbit hole: Why are we getting health advice in the snack aisle? Holiday plans and the inevitable pre-trip panic.

Support the Show:

👉 Grab the Merch:

https://glaswegians-anonymous-march.bigcartel.com

🎙️ live show:

https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2Patreon: patreon.com/glaswegiansanonymousDon’t forget to like, subscribe, and hit the bell for all the latest episodes of Glaswegians Anonymous!#GlaswegiansAnonymous #GlasgowPodcast #Mounjaro #Asda #SummerHolidays #ScottishComedy #GlasgowPatter

In this week’s episode of Glaswegians Anonymous, the boys are back to dissect the chaotic reality of modern travel and the even more questionable state of modern intimacy.Gary takes us through his recent Venetian escape, including the humbling experience of navigating the hostel scene—and shares his plans for his upcoming Swedish expedition. Meanwhile, the drama continues on home soil as we finally get to the bottom of Darren’s "alleged" appearance at Gary’s recent gig in Cumbernauld (or lack thereof).Things take a sharp turn into the bizarre as we tackle the hard-hitting questions: Are we really still talking about penis pumps in 2026? And just how close are we to a world populated by sentient sex robots? Plus, we break down the logistics of Darren’s upcoming gig—which happens to fall on the exact same day as the Glasgow Orange Walk.

Tune in for the usual unfiltered, Glaswegian take on the world’s weirdest corners.

Support the Show:👉 Grab the Merch: https://glaswegians-anonymous-march.bigcartel.com

🎙️ live show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

Patreon: patreon.com/glaswegiansanonymous

🔔 Subscribe: Hit that bell so you never miss an episode.💬

#standupcomedy GlaswegiansAnonymous #ScottishPodcast

Welcome back to another chaotic hour with the Glaswegians Anonymous crew. This week, the ego is high, the history is deep, and the "patter" is as sharp as a broken bottle of Buckfast.

Muscle, Fame, and The Barras

We kick things off with Darren, who has clearly been spending more time at the gym than the pub lately. He’s officially declaring himself a "beefcake," though the rest of the room might have a different word for it. From there, we dive into:

• The Scottish Celebrity Tier List: Where exactly do we rank in the hierarchy of Scottish legends? (Warning: Our self-assessment is dangerously high).

• The Barras Boys: How we officially earned the title and why the world’s most famous market is our spiritual home.

The Ultimate Glasgow Guide

Whether you’re a "teuchter" visiting for the weekend or a tourist from across the pond, we’re breaking down the essentials:

• First-Time Recommendations: Where to go if you want the real Glasgow experience (and where to avoid if you want to keep your shoes).

• The Sub Crawl: A survival guide to Glasgow’s "Clockwork Orange." 15 stops, 15 drinks—will you make it back to St. Enoch?

Gary’s History Corner

Gary took a trip to the Glasgow Police Museum this week, and he’s come back armed with facts. Get ready for a double-header of Glasgow’s gritty past:

• The Thin Blue Line: A lesson on the origins and evolution of the Glasgow police force.

• The Duke Street Jail Break: Gary takes us back to the infamous IRA attack on Duke Street Jail. It’s a bit of heavy history delivered with the usual Glaswegians Anonymous flair.

Plus, much more madness, questionable life advice, and enough nonsense to fill the Clyde.

Listen now on all major platforms!

Support the Show:👉 Grab the Merch: https://glaswegians-anonymous-march.bigcartel.com🎙️ live show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2Patreon: patreon.com/glaswegiansanonymous🔔 Subscribe: Hit that bell so you never miss an episode.💬 Comment below: What year would YOU travel back to, and do you believe in ghosts?#GlaswegiansAnonymous #ScottishPodcast

Welcome back to another chaotic installment of Glaswegians Anonymous. This week, the boys are balancing local stardom with existential dread, questionable dietary choices, and some very sketchy political ambitions.

Gig News & Inky Bets

Gary is heading up to Aberdeen, and the stakes are high. He’s officially pledged that if he sells out the gig, he’s getting an Aberdeen tattoo. Will he follow through, or is he just "aff his nut"? Meanwhile, Darren is absolutely flying—his Glasgow shows are sold out, and his special is already 50% gone.

Health, Wealth, and the Afterlife

It wouldn't be an episode without some neurosis. Darren opens up about his health anxiety, which naturally leads the pair into a lighthearted (and slightly morbid) discussion about exactly how they want to die.

The Scran Report

• The Low: Gary recounts the absolute horror of his "worst kebab ever" from Bistro in Glasgow.

• The High: A massive shoutout to Smokey Trotter Kitchen—officially 10/10 every single time.

Holiday Blues & Caravan Life

Gary’s back from Craig Tara, discussing the nuances of caravan upgrades and the timeless parental struggle: justifies taking the weans out of school during term time to save a few quid.

Also in this episode:

• The Patreon Group Chat: Why it’s the best place on the internet right now.

• The Magic: Darren and Gary are taking to the stage together to do The Magic (yes, it’s exactly what you think).

• Scottish Elections: Why the boys are throwing their weight behind the Christian Hash Party.

Support the Show:👉 Grab the Merch: https://glaswegians-anonymous-march.bigcartel.com🎙️ live show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2Patreon: patreon.com/glaswegiansanonymous🔔 Subscribe: Hit that bell so you never miss an episode.💬 Comment below: What year would YOU travel back to, and do you believe in ghosts?#GlaswegiansAnonymous #ScottishPodcast

Buckle up, because Episode 36 of Glaswegians Anonymous goes off the rails faster than a shopping trolley in the Clyde.We started this session with the best of intentions, aiming for a civilized chat about summer holidays—sun, sand, and the inevitable Scottish sunburn. But, true to form, the conversation didn't stay "civilized" for long. What began as travel tips quickly descended into absolute, unadulterated madness.By the time we reached the "nutritional" portion of the evening, logic had completely left the building. We answer the question that absolutely nobody asked, but everyone is now cursed to know: Just how many calories are in a ladle of... well, you’ve read the title.Warning: This one is definitely not for the faint of heart (or anyone currently eating lunch).Listen NowAvailable on all your favorite platforms. Don’t forget to rate, review, and seek professional help after listening.Support the Show:👉 Grab the Merch: https://glaswegians-anonymous-march.bigcartel.com🎙️ live show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2Patreon: patreon.com/glaswegiansanonymous🔔 Subscribe: Hit that bell so you never miss an episode.💬 Comment below: What year would YOU travel back to, and do you believe in ghosts?#GlaswegiansAnonymous #ScottishPodcast

Welcome back to another episode of Glaswegians Anonymous! In Episode 35, the mood swings from absolute buzzing excitement to some heavy, deep-seated chat. We’re covering everything from finally getting our hands on the gear to what happens when the lights go out.In this episode:

• The Merch is HERE! 👕 Darren is absolutely over the moon because we’ve finally launched the official GA merch. We talk about the journey to getting the kit sorted and why Darren won't be taking his off anytime soon.• The Supernatural: 👻 Do the guys believe in ghosts? We dive into the paranormal and share whether we think there's actually someone (or something) watching from the shadows.• On the Road: 🎤 Both the guys recently performed at a Stuart Mitchell gig. We break down the night, the laughs, and what it’s like sharing the stage with one of Scotland’s finest.• Heavy Doc, Heavy: 🏎️ Gary sat down to watch Back to the Future with his weans. We discuss the magic of introducing the classics to the next generation and, more importantly—if we had a DeLorean, what year are we heading to? * The Deep End: 🕯️ Things take a serious turn toward the end of the episode. The guys open up about visitations and the spiritual side of life. It gets raw, it gets real, and it’s a side of the pod you won’t want to miss.Support the Show:👉 Grab the Merch: https://glaswegians-anonymous-march.bigcartel.com🎙️ live show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2Patreon: patreon.com/glaswegiansanonymous🔔 Subscribe: Hit that bell so you never miss an episode.💬 Comment below: What year would YOU travel back to, and do you believe in ghosts?#GlaswegiansAnonymous #ScottishPodcast #StuartMitchell

Buckle up, because Episode 34 is a pure rocket ship of nonsense. This week, the Glaswegians Anonymous crew are tackling everything from the local chippy to the lunar surface. We’re asking the big questions: Is Trump actually losing it? Can you claim disability if you're living in zero gravity? And exactly how far is Gary willing to go for a free meal?Inside This Episode:

• Culinary Crimes: We dive deep into our questionable food habits. Why is everything better when it’s been in a deep fat fryer for ten minutes, and at what point does a snack become a cry for help?• Desperate Times, Desperate Measures: We put Gary in the hot seat. The hypothetical question of the century: Would Gary "suck it in the street" just for a bit of grub? The answer might surprise you (or honestly, it probably won't).• The Orange Menace: We take a look across the pond at Donald Trump and his latest brand of madness. Whether he’s running the world or running his mouth, we’ve got thoughts—and they aren't pretty.• One Small Step for Man, One Giant Leap for a Scheme: We’re chatting about the Moon visit. Is it worth the trip, or is it just a cold, dusty version of Drumchapel with less atmosphere?• The DWP Chronicles: The main event. If you’ve ever wondered how to get a claim in without losing your mind, we’re breaking down the struggle. We’re aiming high—we want that Space PIP. If the government can spend billions on rockets, they can surely spare a few quid for our "space-related" anxiety.Plus much, much more chaos. Whether you're listening on the bus, at work, or while hiding from the DWP assessor, this one is for you.Tune in, get involved, and remember: keep it Glaswegian.Don’t forget to subscribe and leave us a review if you’re enjoying the chaos.

🎟️ Tickets for the next show:

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The sun has finally made a guest appearance in Glasgow, which means two things: everyone is suddenly "taps aff" at Glasgow Green, and the unsolicited commentary is at an all-time high. In this episode, the gang gets into the grit of surviving a Scottish summer while navigating the unwanted gaze and the internal battle of body shame.The Heatwave & The HustleWe kick things off with a candid discussion on body shame. As the layers come off, the insecurities come out, and we address the episode’s namesake: the exhausting reality of dealing with guys who can’t keep their eyes to themselves just because the temperature hit 18°C.From there, we pivot to a classic Glasgow mystery: How do the local "jakies" always have better trainers than us? While we’re out here working 9-to-5s just to afford a pair of scuffed Gazelles, the boys on the corner are rocking pristine, limited-edition vapormax. We investigate the secrets of the street-side "crep" game.Window Cleaning & Lockdown SecretsDarren takes us down memory lane with his Confessions of a Window Cleaner. Ever wondered what it was like to be one of the few people allowed to roam the streets during COVID? Darren reveals the strange sights, the lockdown "activities" he caught through the glass, and what it’s really like being the neighborhood’s most essential (and unintentional) voyeur.The Great Food Debates• Eggy Bread vs. French Toast: It’s the age-old question. Is it a sophisticated brunch item or a salty, ketchup-covered hangover cure? The team draws a line in the sand.• Professor Green’s Glasgow Spot: We review the latest food venture from Professor Green and see if it lives up to the hype in the Glasgow food scene.• Gary vs. Mounjaro: In a feat of pure willpower (and perhaps a bit of gluttony), Gary explains exactly how he managed to "out-fat" the world’s most famous weight-loss drug. Science said he’d lose the appetite; Gary said, "Watch this."

Nostalgia & Final Tributes• RIP Chuck Norris: We pay our respects to the legend himself. Whether it’s the memes or the roundhouse kicks, the world feels a little less safe today.• Childhood Video Vault: From The Krankies to old-school VHS tapes of The Lion King, we talk about the videos that raised us and why we keep going back to them for comfort.• Scottish Sun Spots: If you’re looking to escape the city, we shout out our favorite spots to soak up the UV rays—from the "Costa del Troon" to the hidden gems in the Highlands.Don’t forget to subscribe and leave us a review if you’re enjoying the chaos.

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The boys are back and, quite frankly, they’ve reached a breaking point. This week, Darren and Gary recap their experience taking on the Open Goal Hot Wings challenge, but it wasn't just the spice that had them sweating—it was the camera angles.After a harrowing look at their own side profiles on screen, Gary finally snaps. In a monologue for the ages, he officially announces his retirement from the "dieting" game. Why fight the inevitable when you can embrace the inevitable? Gary is pivoting, rebranding, and leaning into his true calling as Glasgow's next big food vlogger.Inside the Episode:• The Wing Report: A post-match analysis of the Open Goal challenge. Who handled the heat and who looked like they were meeting their maker?• The Side Profile Crisis: The harsh reality of seeing yourself on camera and why the "chin-to-neck" ratio has Gary questioning everything.• The Great Meltdown: Gary explains why he’s done with calorie counting and "health."• A New Career Path: From podcast host to food vlogger—prepare for a lot more gravy and a lot less shame."I'm done. I'm off the diets and I'm strictly on the dinners. If you see me in a bakery, mind your business." — GaryWarning: Contains strong language, questionable life choices, and a complete disregard for cholesterol levels.

Listen now and join the carnage.

Don’t forget to subscribe and leave us a review if you’re enjoying the chaos.

🎟️ Tickets for the next show:

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#GlaswegiansAnonymous #NathanielCollins #GlasgowPodcast #ScottishBoxing #NewEpisode #PodcastScotland #GlasgowLife

Buckle up for another dose of pure Glasgow patter as Gary and Darren return to the mics for a look back at a chaotic week. This episode is a proper mixed bag—ranging from nostalgic tech talk to some seriously questionable life choices.Here’s the script for this week’s madness:

• Parenting or Procrastination? Gary explains why he spent his week building a den with the weans when they definitely should’ve been sitting at their desks.

• Back in the Game: Gary gives us the lowdown on his recent Blackfriars show and provides an update on his journey being back on testosterone.

• Nostalgia Trip: The boys reminisce about the glory days of getting NTL installed, the genius of Kenan & Kel, and their all-time favorite childhood cartoons.

• The "Mental" Category: From the most bizarre things they’ve ever eaten to Gary’s controversial celebrity crush (spoiler: it’s Isa from Still Game), nothing is off-limits.

• Pure Filth & Questionable Pastimes: The chat takes a turn as the boys discuss "first-hand" experiences of getting fingered and Darren reveals some of his more suspicious hobbies.

• Local News: A look at the recent Union Street fire and what’s actually going on in the heart of the city.

Whether you’re here for the comedy insights or the absolute nonsense, Glaswegians Anonymous has you covered.

Listen now on all your favorite platforms!

Don’t forget to subscribe and leave us a review if you’re enjoying the chaos.

🎟️ Tickets for the next show:

https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

#GlaswegiansAnonymous #NathanielCollins #GlasgowPodcast #ScottishBoxing #NewEpisode #PodcastScotland #GlasgowLife

In this landmark 30th episode, the boys are joined by a man who knows exactly what it takes to reach the top of the mountain: British and Commonwealth Featherweight Champion, Nathaniel Collins.Nathaniel takes us behind the curtain of the professional fight game, and it’s not all glitz and gold belts.

We’re talking about the mental and physical torture of "the cut"—that brutal period before a fight where every calorie is a memory and the obsession with food reaches fever pitch.From dreaming about "scran" to the legendary first meal post-fight, Nathaniel gets real about the sacrifices made in camp.

We also take a trip down memory lane to the lockdown days, where Nathaniel was busy putting Darren through his paces (and wondering if he'd survive the session).

Plus, we tackle a classic Glasgow phenomenon: Why is it that every guy in a local pub, after two pints, thinks they can puff their chests out and have a "square go" with a professional fighter?

On the menu this week:• The Hunger Games: The psychological warfare of making weight.• The Food Obsession: What happens when you can’t stop thinking about a cheeseburger.• Lockdown Drills: Training Darren when the world was shut down.• Glasgow "Hardmen": Dealing with the egos who think they can take a pro.• The Big Stage: Looking ahead to the massive upcoming fight at the OVO Hydro.Whether you're a boxing fanatic or just here for the patter, this is an elite-level chat with one of the city's finest athletes.

Follow Nathaniel:

Insta: https://www.instagram.com/nathanielcollins/?hl=en

Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@nathanielcollins3?

SUBSCRIBE TO OUR PATREON - patreon.com/glaswegiansanonymous

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In this week’s episode, Gary and Darren dive into a chaotic mix of rural life, questionable grooming habits, and high-stakes football tension.Here’s what the lads are getting into:• Farm Life & Nostalgia: Gary shares his experience going lambing, leading into a deep dive on how childhood has changed since "back in the day."• The Tech Struggle: A congested Darren explains why he ended up signing up for his own Patreon just to watch a video, while the guys officially introduce the new Patreon tiers.• Football Fever: Gary relives his favorite goal against Celtic from the weekend, and they look ahead to the Rangers v Celtic Scottish Cup game—which they’ll be watching live with you on Patreon!• Health & Hazards: Between Gary’s blood test results and some highly suspicious nose-hair waxing methods, the health chat is... questionable at best.• The Hollywood Rabbit Hole: Why Gary wants to talk about the war (and Darren doesn't), the theory that Jim Carrey is a clone, and a look back at their favorite Jim Carrey movies.• School Days & Big Shoes: Memories of the "dinner ticket" era at primary school, and a serious debate on whether they’d accept a career change to become the next Ronald McDonald.• Jealousy & Wings: Gary gets honest about his "friendship jealousy" over Darren hanging out with other comedians, all while they prep for the Open Goal Wings Challenge.JOIN THE CLAN: We’re officially on Patreon! Want to watch the Old Firm with us this weekend and get exclusive bonus content?

patreon.com/glaswegiansanonymous

Don't forget to Like, Subscribe, and hit the Bell icon so you never miss a square go.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2#GlaswegiansAnonymous #ScottishComedy #GlasgowLife #NewEpisode #ScottishPodcast

Welcome back to another chaotic episode of Glaswegians Anonymous. This week, the fitness regime has taken a bit of a turn, the nostalgia is hitting hard, and Darren’s social calendar is causing some serious domestic tension in the studio.On this week’s madness:• The King of Pop (via Greenock): Darren makes the pilgrimage to see a Michael Jackson tribute act. Let’s just say the moonwalk hits different when you’re down the water.• "Sit Doon or Get Rooted": A near-confrontation with a woman who refused to take her seat. Is it even a night out in Scotland if someone doesn't almost get offered a square go over basic etiquette?• Jolly Giant Nostalgia: Gary takes us on a trip down memory lane to the 90s. If you didn’t spend your childhood sprinting through the aisles of the Jolly Giant, did you even grow up in Glasgow?• The Wings of Death: The boys are prepping for the Open Goal Hot Wings Challenge next week. Expect tears, sweat, and immediate regret.• Big Dunc FOMO: Darren is off to see the legend Duncan Ferguson. Gary is handling the news with his usual grace (meaning he’s absolutely ragin’ and full of FOMO).• The Barras Vlog: We’re planning a trip to the iconic Barras market. Get ready for some high-quality content featuring knock-off gear and world-class patter.🚨 SUPPORT THE SHOW 🚨We’ve officially launched our Patreon! If you want to support the nonsense and get access to exclusive perks, get yourself over to:👉

Patreon.com/glaswegiansanonymous

Don't forget to Like, Subscribe, and hit the Bell icon so you never miss a square go.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2#GlaswegiansAnonymous #ScottishComedy #GlasgowLife #NewEpisode #ScottishPodcast

Back with another week of madness with Darren & Gary:The Comedy Grind: Gary is officially "going demented" with full-time comedy. Between forgetting when the schools are off and showing up late, the lifestyle is clearly taking its toll.• The Digital Traitor: Hear how Gary used AI to create a cursed image of Charlie Mulgrew in a Rangers top. Is nothing sacred anymore?• Stage & Screen: Darren celebrates his Scottish BAFTA nomination (no big deal!) and looks back on attending Gary’s first-ever tour show in Paisley.• Touring Troubles: The boys get real about the press coverage surrounding Darren’s cancelled tour dates and his big move back into the wild world of crowd work shows.• The Random Bits: * Why was Gary at a Panto in February?• The ethics of "content creators" pinching ideas.• A debate on their absolute favourite rooms to play in Glasgow.• The Finale: We finally address the mystery of the Pickle Jar Incident.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2#GlaswegiansAnonymous #ScottishComedy #GlasgowLife #NewEpisode #ScottishPodcast

In this week’s chaotic installment of Glaswegians Anonymous, Gary and Darren prove that 9:00 AM is an ungodly hour for two comedians with ADHD to be operating heavy machinery (or even a microphone).

From career milestones to hypothetical cellmates, the boys cover:

• The 9:00 AM Struggle: An honest look at the brain fog and executive dysfunction that hits when you try to be funny before the caffeine kicks in.

• Going Pro: Big news as Gary officially goes full-time with comedy. The lads discuss the leap of faith and what life looks like without a "real" job.

• Behind Bars: The unique energy of performing jail gigs. Is it the toughest crowd in Scotland, or just the most honest one?

• Cellmate Romance: With February in the air, the boys imagine a very specific Valentine's Day scenario: what would life look like if Gary and Darren were sharing a cell? (Spoiler: It’s not pretty, but it’s probably hilarious).

• Glee Club Chaos: Darren breaks down a recent battle with hecklers at Glasgow’s Glee Club and the art of shutting down the front row without losing the room.

"Doing a podcast at 9am with ADHD isn't a broadcast, it's a wellness check."

Listen now on your favorite platform!

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Episode 25 is coming at you live from the heart of the Barras! We set up shop in Smokey Trotter’s Kitchen with a list of audience suggestions and zero self-control.

In true Darren and Gary fashion, the "plan" goes out the window within minutes as the boys spiral into a series of mad tangents involving childhood lofts, questionable grooming habits, and a smell Gary will never forget.

The Highlights (or Lowlights):

• The Ultimate Swerve: We managed to avoid all political chat by dodging Donald Trump entirely—somehow replacing him with a deep dive into Screech from Saved by the Bell.

• The "Mary Doll" Collision: Gary recounts his brush with Scottish comedy royalty and the time he nearly ended Elaine C. Smith.

• The Loft Years: Darren opens up about being the "hidden child" and getting locked away in the loft.

• The Taste of Fear: Gary describes a fart at one of his gigs so potent he didn't just smell it—he actually tasted it.

• A Very Sensitive Pre-Date: Darren shares the harrowing story of using Veet on his "special areas" before a big night out.

• Diagnosis & Brine: Darren updates us on his autism test and proves that his pickle obsession is now officially a lifestyle choice.

• The Dark Web of the Audience: We look into the weirdest porn habits suggested by you lot. (Get help, seriously.)

• Death Row Dinners: What would your final meal be? The boys debate the essential last munch.

• Cameo Chaos: The absurdity of buying videos from washed-up celebrities.

Keep Up With The Madness:

📍 Location: Huge thanks to Smokey Trotter’s Kitchen at the Barras for the hospitality and the best scran in the city.

🔔 Subscribe: Hit that button and turn on notifications. It’s the only way to keep Gary out of the loft.

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In this week’s episode of Glaswegians Anonymous, Gary and Darren take a deep dive into the chaotic spectrum of modern life—ranging from international warfare to the local chippy.The lads don’t hold back as they tackle the heavy hitters and the high-protein hitters, covering:• The Thin Blue Line: A heated debate on whether the police should be armed. Is it time for Glocks on the Gallowgate, or are we better off without?• The "Station" Experience: From the awkwardness of encounters with the law to the high-stakes mission of retrieving a Young Scot card from the local station.• The Rise of the Machines: Darren and Gary share their latest chats with ChatGPT. Are we looking at a digital revolution or just a fancy way to argue with a toaster?• The Paranormal & The Political: Do ghosts exist, or is it just the wind in the tenement? Plus, a look at "Trump’s Board of Peace" and the terrifyingly unlikely (but let’s discuss it anyway) prospect of America invading the UK.• Gary’s Personal Crisis: Between eating a takeaway every single day and a spiraling case of death anxiety, Gary wonders if he’ll meet the ghosts he doesn't believe in sooner than expected.It’s raw, it’s unfiltered, and it’s pure Glasgow.Where to listenAvailable now on all major platforms. Tune in for the patter, stay for the existential dread.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

Buckle up, because this week Darren and Gary are diving into the deep end of the "too much information" pool. In an episode that swings wildly from the medical to the geopolitical, no topic is too taboo (or too messy) for the lads to tackle.Inside This Episode:• The Deep Clean: Darren gives us a blow-by-blow account of his recent colonic irrigation. From the clinical dignity of the waiting room to the... less dignified reality of the procedure, find out if he’s feeling lighter or just traumatized.• The Private Life: The boys get uncomfortably honest about their preferred "solitary habits." We find out exactly where the magic happens (or doesn't) in a conversation that'll make you want to bleach your headphones.• The Trump Doctrine: Switching gears to the Leader of the Free World, the lads discuss the 47th President’s bizarre foreign policy ambitions—specifically, his recurring dream of invading Greenland. Is it a real estate play or just a very cold ego trip?• The Golden Arches Diet: Finally, we break down the secret to presidential longevity: a strict regimen of Big Macs and Diet Coke. Is it the ultimate power move, or is his blood type just "Special Sauce" at this point?Warning: Contains strong language, graphic medical descriptions, and opinions that definitely haven't been fact-checked by anyone, anywhere.

Like, Comment, and Subscribe if you want more mayhem.

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Buckle up for another chaotic shift with the Glaswegians Anonymous crew! This week, Gary and Darren are trading the microphones for aprons—or at least they’re dreaming about it.

Here’s what’s cooking in Episode 22:

• The Roll of a Lifetime: Following the legendary Morton’s rolls saga, Gary and Darren discuss their newfound ambition to become the city’s next top bakers.

• The Ultimate Filling: We settle the debate once and for all—what is the definitive, non-negotiable filling for a crispy Morton’s roll?

• New Year, Same Gary: It’s resolution season, and Gary is already over it. He breaks down exactly why he hates them (mostly because he can’t keep them) and the boys share their most successful—and disastrous—attempts at "self-improvement."

• Extreme Diets: Gary announces his plan to attempt a 40-day fast, while Darren reminisces about the time he went full Christian Bale and attempted The Machinist diet.

• Getting Personal: Things take a turn for the "distinctly Glaswegian" as the boys get honest about the weirdest things they’ve ever had to use when the toilet roll ran out.

Warning: This episode contains high-carb dreams, low-calorie nightmares, and some very questionable bathroom habits.

Listen now on your favorite platform!

Like, Comment, and Subscribe if you want more mayhem.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

The boys are back for the first sit-down of 2026, and let’s just say the festive period has left its mark—mostly on Gary’s waistline and Darren’s ego.In this episode, Gary and Darren dissect the chaos of Christmas and New Year. While Darren has emerged looking suspiciously "fresh" (leading to an investigation into his new glow), Gary is mostly just recovering from a dairy-induced coma.What’s on the menu:• The Transformation: Darren is looking good, feeling good, and hitting the boxing training hard. Is he the next world champ or just the fittest guy at the bus stop?• The Cheese Board Incident: Gary admits to polishing off an entire cheese board solo, but the real tragedy is his botanical knowledge—apparently, he’s been eating chives thinking they were shamrocks.• The Country has Changed: Gary gets philosophical (and a bit worried) about the state of the nation. It’s not the Scotland he remembers, and he’s got thoughts.• Derby Day Drama: The dust has settled on the Old Firm / Glasgow Derby, and the boys weigh in on the result that has half the city celebrating and the other half hiding under their duvets.• Square Gos: In a bold move that absolutely nobody asked for, Darren explains why he’s ready to take Amy Macdonald and Richard Foster in a square go.It’s a high-energy start to the year filled with questionable fitness advice, botanical errors, and the usual West Coast nonsense.Like, Comment, and Subscribe if you want more mayhem.

🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

The mics are hot and the filters are off. 🎙️🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

In Part 2 of our live special, we’re diving into the Glaswegians Anonymous Podcast. After the stand-up tension has cleared, [Name] and [Guest Name] sit down to discuss the absolute state of the city, listener confessions, and the kind of stories that can only happen in Glasgow.

Expect:

• Deep dives into Glasgow culture.

• Live Q&A and "Anonymous" submissions from the night.

• The stories we couldn't tell in the stand-up set.

The front row thought they were safe—they were wrong. 🎤💥

Welcome to Part 1 of Glaswegians Anonymous Live, recorded at [Insert Venue Name, e.g., The Glee Club/Rotunda]. In this set, it’s all about the audience. From questionable career choices to chaotic nights out in the West End, no stone is left unturned as [Name] takes on the best (and worst) of the Glasgow crowd.

In this video:

• The art of the Glasgow heckle.

• Why you should never tell a comedian where you work.

• Pure, unscripted chaos.

Merry Christmas from the city where the "Star of Bethlehem" is usually just a police helicopter! This week, Darren and Gary tuck into a festive feast of nonsense, regret, and questionable spiritual enlightenment.The boys start by dissecting the unique misery of staring at a turkey dinner while coming down, before reminiscing about the last-minute chaos of the Barras on Christmas Eve. Gary opens up about his newfound love for Jesus, which leads to an invitation to the (very real?) ‘Super God Comedy Squad’ retreat.Highlights of the Holiday Chaos:• The Big Question: Would Gary actually agree to baptise Darren?• The Clyde Ritual: A debate on the logistics of "bare bum baptisms" in Glasgow’s freezing river.• A Field in the Dark: Gary recounts a mysterious encounter that definitely wasn't a Christmas miracle.• Divine Surveillance: A terrifying reminder that God is always watching... even when you’re "enjoying yourself" alone.• Festive Logistics: How to rinse Costco for every free sample available to man.They also tackle the highs and lows of the season, from the best and worst presents they’ve ever received to the pain of family members not showing up to comedy gigs (and Gary’s habit of being a nightmare in the front row when he’s the one in the audience).Whether you’re heading to Midnight Mass or just hiding from your relatives, grab a drink and join the boys for the least holy Christmas special in Scotland.Like, Comment, and Subscribe if you want more mayhem.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

It’s the pre-Christmas special, and the festive stress is officially kicking in!On this week’s Glaswegians Anonymous, we are breaking down the absolute chaos of the season. Gary is gearing up to take the kids away for Christmas (pray for him), and we discuss why the Christmas Market at the Four Corners is currently the wildest place on earth.We also dive into the big ambitions for the year ahead. Gary’s got the vision board out for 2026, he’s practicing The Magic, and he’s trying to manifest his way to millions using The Secret—unfortunately, nobody told HMRC that positive vibes don't pay the bill.Plus, we break down that horrific World Cup draw, the dream of obtaining the mythical Irn-Bru Carnival Black Card, and what happened when Gary dragged Darren to church.In this episode:• 🎅 Festive Fear: Gary taking the weans on holiday.• 🎡 Carnival Dreams: The campaign for the Irn-Bru Carnival VIP Black Card starts here.• ⚽ World Cup Woes: Reaction to the draw (why is it always us?).• 🙏 Holy Moly: Gary takes Darren to church.• 🔮 Manifestation vs Reality: Vision boards, The Secret, and why the Taxman doesn't care about your frequency.Grab a mulled wine (or a stiff drink) and get involved.Like, Comment, and Subscribe if you want more mayhem.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

The boys are back! Darren is officially surviving the flu, which gives him just enough energy to roast Gary for his latest confession: he used to have Boobs.In this episode:• Gary almost dies on stage in Aberdeen (literally). 💀• Darren deals with a serious clown problem. 🤡• We break down Gary’s bakery order. 🥐• The dreaded "leakage" after a slash. 💦• And finally... the story of Darren and the "Turbo Glup Glup" in Amsterdam. Don't ask, just listen.Get it in yer ears! 🎧Like, Comment, and Subscribe if you want more mayhem.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

WE ARE BACK! And we are still buzzing from the absolute scenes at the Glee Club!Episode 15 is a massive recap of our sold-out live show in Glasgow. If you were there, you know it was pure chaos from start to finish. If you weren't, get this watched to see what you missed.We break down the best moments of the night, the mad atmosphere, and the banter that could only happen in Glasgow.ALSO IN THIS EPISODE:Darren makes a massive announcement that has left us all confused. He’s officially boycotted online "content." That’s right—no more WiFi required. He’s gone proper old school and admits he’s now strictly using catalogues for his... personal time. The Next Directory has never been in so much danger.Expect the usual mad banter, roasting, and absolute nonsense.Like, Comment, and Subscribe if you want more mayhem.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2#GlaswegianAnonymous #glasgow #gleeclub #scottishcomedy #LiveShow #podcast #banter

YES! IT ACTUALLY HAPPENED! 🏆

On this week's episode of Glaswegians Anonymous, Gary and Darren are absolutely buzzing after Tuesday night's historic result. Scotland has officially qualified for the World Cup, and the boys are here to break down the scenes, the celebrations, and what this means for the Tartan Army.

It’s getting nostalgic as the guys look back at the squad from 1998 the last time we made it to the big stage. Can we top that party this time around?

Plus: In a massive curveball, we have a hilarious surprise chat involving the legend that is Marti Pellow and... Gary’s mum? You do not want to miss this piece of podcast gold.

In this episode:

• 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 Scotland qualifies for the World Cup!

• 🍻 Recapping the Tuesday night madness.

• 🏙️ Throwback: George Square & France '98.

• 🎤 The Marti Pellow & Gary’s Mum situation.

Like, Subscribe, and let us know in the comments: Where were you when that goal hit the back of the net?

#GlaswegiansAnonymous #GaryFaulds #DarrenConnell #Scotland #TartanArmy #WorldCup #ScotlandNationalTeam #GeorgeSquare #MartiPellow #GlasgowComedy #ScottishFootball #NoScotlandNoParty #Podcast #Glasgow

This week, the lads confess all. Darren and Gary take a trip down memory lane to revisit every mental, desperate, and downright daft diet they’ve ever attempted.Then, they get real about the present state of affairs: Darren's on a new journey, smashing boxing training three times a week, while Gary reveals why he’s officially chucked the Mounjaro.This Podcast is Brought to you by - Smokey Trotters KitchenOrder on DeliverooEat in the OG down the BarrasFollow here - https://www.instagram.com/smokeytrotterskitchen?igsh=MWpuano5OG16NGI4Ng==#glasgow #scottishpodcast #diets #boxing #podcast #comedypodcast #glasgowlife #glasgowbanter #scottishcomedy #scotland

Remember when Bonfire Night in Glasgow was a different kind of wild?This week, Gary and Darren dive into the smoky archives of their memories to talk all things Guy Fawkes. They look back at what Bonfire Night was really like "back in the day" compared to the organised displays of today.From the massive, legendary bonfires down Glasgow Green to the pure chaos of folk shooting fireworks at each other in the street, the lads leave no stone unturned. Was it better, or was it just madness?Join the boys for another dose of hilarious stories, proper Glasgow nostalgia, and a chat about how much things have (or haven't) changed.

New episodes of Glaswegians Anonymous out every week!

LIVE SHOW ANNOUNCEMENT!We're taking the podcast to the stage! Join us for a special live recording of Glaswegians Anonymous at The Glee Club in Glasgow this November. It's going to be a brilliant night of stories and laughs.

Tickets are on sale now – grab yours before they're gone!Book here: https://booking.glee.co.uk/22908

This Podcast is Brought to you by - Smokey Trotters Kitchen

Order on Deliveroo

Eat in the OG down the Barras

Follow here - https://www.instagram.com/smokeytrotterskitchen?igsh=MWpuano5OG16NGI4Ng==

#GlaswegiansAnonymous #BonfireNight #GuyFawkes #Glasgow #ScottishPodcast #GlasgowComedy #BackInTheDay #Nostalgia #GlasgowGreen #ScottishComedy #GaryFaulds #DarrenConnell

Prepare for liftoff... or something.This week, Darren and Gary are talking all things extraterrestrial. We get into the mysterious "3i atlas," Gary’s personal relationship with both aliens and God (aye, really), and the most important question of all:If aliens landed in Glesga, where would you take them for the ultimate day out?From the deep unknown to the best tourist traps, it's a cosmic one.LIVE SHOW ANNOUNCEMENT!We're taking the podcast to the stage! Join us for a special live recording of Glaswegians Anonymous at The Glee Club in Glasgow this November. It's going to be a brilliant night of stories and laughs.Tickets are on sale now – grab yours before they're gone!

Book here: https://booking.glee.co.uk/22908

This Podcast is Brought to you by - Smokey Trotters KitchenOrder on DeliverooEat in the OG down the BarrasFollow here - https://www.instagram.com/smokeytrotterskitchen?igsh=MWpuano5OG16NGI4Ng==#GlaswegiansAnonymous #Glasgow #Aliens #ScottishPodcast #ComedyPodcast #UFO #DayOutInGlasgow

In Episode 10 of Glaswegians Anonymous, Darren and Gary take a hilarious and brutally honest trip down memory lane — sharing their first drinking experiences, nights at the unders, and park bevvy sessions. They also get real about why Darren chose to go sober, and Gary reveals how Mounjaro has left him unable to trust a fart. It’s equal parts chaos, confession, and classic Glaswegian banter.

LIVE SHOW ANNOUNCEMENT!We're taking the podcast to the stage! Join us for a special live recording of Glaswegians Anonymous at The Glee Club in Glasgow this November. It's going to be a brilliant night of stories and laughs.Tickets are on sale now – grab yours before they're gone!Book here: https://booking.glee.co.uk/22908This Podcast is Brought to you by - Smokey Trotters KitchenOrder on DeliverooEat in the OG down the BarrasFollow here - https://www.instagram.com/smokeytrotterskitchen?igsh=MWpuano5OG16NGI4Ng==#GlaswegiansAnonymous #ScottishPodcast #GlasgowHumour #ScottishComedy #GlasgowBanter #UndersNights #FirstDrinkStories #SoberLife #MounjaroDiaries #PodcastClips #FunnyPodcast #RealTalk #GlasgowLife #ScottishCulture #PodcastComedy

Remember your first-ever job? This week, Gary and Darren take a trip down memory lane to discuss the highs and lows of earning their first wage packet.

Darren recalls the wild west of the supermarket car park during his time as a trolley boy, while Gary talks us through his days as a solder and the unforgettable stories from his time behind the wheel as a Glasgow taxi driver.

LIVE SHOW ANNOUNCEMENT!

We're taking the podcast to the stage! Join us for a special live recording of Glaswegians Anonymous at The Glee Club in Glasgow this November. It's going to be a brilliant night of stories and laughs.

Tickets are on sale now – grab yours before they're gone!

Book here: https://booking.glee.co.uk/22908 -

This Podcast is Brought to you by - Smokey Trotters KitchenOrder on DeliverooEat in the OG down the BarrasFollow here - https://www.instagram.com/smokeytrotterskitchen?igsh=MWpuano5OG16NGI4Ng==#GlaswegiansAnonymous #ScottishComedy #GlasgowPodcast #UKComedians #FunnyPodcast #ComedyPodcast #ScottishHumour #GlasgowLife #SchemeStories #StandUpComedy #PodcastClips #ScottishCulture #GlasgowBanter

Welcome to Glaswegians Anonymous — your weekly catch-up with two of the wildest comedians in the UK!

This week, Darren and Gary take a trip down memory lane, chatting about their days in primary school, growing up in the scheme, and what it was really like trying to fit in at school in Glasgow. Expect chaos, nostalgia, and plenty of laughs — straight from the heart of Scotland.

🎧 New episodes every week — hit subscribe and join the madness!

This Podcast is Brought to you by - Smokey Trotters KitchenOrder on DeliverooEat in the OG down the BarrasFollow here - https://www.instagram.com/smokeytrotterskitchen?igsh=MWpuano5OG16NGI4Ng==

#GlaswegiansAnonymous #ScottishComedy #GlasgowPodcast #UKComedians #FunnyPodcast #ComedyPodcast #ScottishHumour #GlasgowLife #SchemeStories #StandUpComedy #PodcastClips #ScottishCulture #GlasgowBanter

Darren and Gary are back with a round of Overrated/Underrated: Glasgow Edition. From the legendary (or not-so-legendary) Forge Shopping Centre to the hallowed turf of Hampden Park, nothing is safe from their hot takes. Expect laughs, debates, and a few controversial opinions about the city we call home.

This Podcast is Brought to you by - Smokey Trotters Kitchen

Order on Deliveroo

Eat in the OG down the Barras

Follow here - https://www.instagram.com/smokeytrotterskitchen?igsh=MWpuano5OG16NGI4Ng==

Darren and Gary are back with more pure Glasgow patter. Gary tells the story of trying out “the hose for your bum” after a jobby, the lads chat about their favourite actor Peter Mullan, and take a nostalgic wander through memories of ice cream vans and smoking buckets. Gary also gears up for a night with UB40. It’s another mix of daft stories, laughs, and unfiltered chat.Please like and Subscribe

Gary and Darren dive headfirst into the world of scheme dinners — from mince ‘n’ tatties to deep-fried everything — and get honest about their own complicated relationships with food. As two big lads, they share stories of comfort eating, growing up in Glasgow households where dinner was an event, and how those habits still shape them today. Gary also opens up about starting Mounjaro and what it’s been like tackling weight loss from a new angle.It’s funny, raw, and very, very Glaswegian.

This Podcast is Brought to you by - Smokey Trotters Kitchen

Get down to the Barras and try Garys favourite 'The Dead Elvis' or order on Deliveroo:

https://www.instagram.com/smokeytrotterskitchen/?hl=en

Darren Connell and Gary Faulds chat about the games folk used to play growing up on the scheme. Darren calls it the “Scheme Olympics,” but Gary’s not having it — he knew it by something else. The conversation drifts, as always, this time onto Gary’s trip to Manjaro, with the usual mix of stories and laughs along the way.

#Glasgow, #Scotland, #ScottishComedy

This Podcast is brought to you by - Smokey Trotters Kitchen

If you're in Glasgow and down the Barras there is no better place to go have a munch than Smokey Trotters, and thats amogst good company down there as well and they're still the best!

We Recoommed you try the Dead Elvis Burger! Find them at 233 London Road or order from Deliveroo:

https://www.instagram.com/smokeytrotterskitchen/?hl=en

In this week’s episode of Glaswegians Anonymous, Gary and Darren dive into the world of Rangers and Celtic’s most famous supporters, sharing stories, laughs, and a few questionable facts. They swap memories of Christmas at the Barras — from dodgy bargains to festive chaos — and Darren opens up about the price of chasing fame, including the moments where it feels like you’re selling your soul just to get noticed.

Funny, raw, and unapologetically Glaswegian!

Darren kicks things off in classic style with a full rant about a £6 Pret sandwich (daylight robbery, if you ask him). From there, he and Gary dive into Glasgow’s food scene — the best scran, the guilty pleasures, and the local favourites that only true Glaswegians understand. Expect laughs, nostalgia, and a healthy dose of rage at overpriced sandwiches.

Welcome to the very first episode of Glaswegians Anonymous, hosted by comedians Gary Faulds and Darren Connell. Kicking things off the only way Glaswegians know how, the boys dive straight into the classic scheme question: “Where you fae?”

From sharing stories about where they grew up to chatting about the people, places, and pure Glasgow madness that shaped them, Gary and Darren set the tone for what’s to come—funny, honest, and unapologetically Glaswegian.

This is just the beginning. Pull up a chair, grab a cuppa (or something stronger), and join us for a laugh as we get into the real Glasgow patter.