Pastors on Porn

This last Sunday Vern spoke at church regarding the spiritual step of self examiniation and confession.  As pastors struggling with our sexual brokenness - it provides a crucial "powerpoint" that is available to us as we see to walk toward a life of healing and wholeness.

If you as a pastor are looking for a safe place to turn to to talk about your sexual struggles - you can get ahold of Vern at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

If you are looking for more free  resources you can also check out the website bandofbrothers.care

Most of us seek to deny, hide, run from or rail agains the sin which dogs our steps.  In this episode Vern proposes a counter intuitive approach that he believes will actually result in better results - sitting in our sin!


If you as a pastor are looking for a safe place to turn to to talk about your sexual struggles - you can get ahold of Vern at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

If you are looking for more resources you can also check out the website bandofbrothers.care

The theme of wide open spaces is one that Scriptural writers come back to over and over again.  In this episode Vern puts on his bible teaching hat and relates to how this concept relates to our desire to walk away from porn and experience the best life that God has for us.

If you as a pastor are looking for a safe place to turn to to talk about your sexual struggles - you can get ahold of Vern at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

If you are looking for more free  resources you can also check out the website bandofbrothers.care

It has become quite common for churches to dip their toes into the stream of recovery groups.  In this episode Vern explores the difference between a church offering recovery programs and a church actually becoming a recovery church where people can acknowledge and grow out of their brokenness.

If you as a pastor are looking for a safe place to turn to to talk about your sexual struggles - you can get ahold of Vern at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

If you are looking for more resources you can also check out the website bandofbrothers.care

Are Pastors Special when it comes to porn? Are there unique reasons why pastors are drawn to porn and are there unique reasons they stay there? In this episode Vern explores that question.

If you as a pastor are looking for a safe place to turn to to talk about your sexual struggles - you can get ahold of Vern at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

If you are looking for more resources you can also check out the website bandofbrothers.care

Looking back over 30 years of being a Pastor - from being an associate, to church planting and being a lead pastor, I have come up with a few overall lessons that I have learned. I think some of these lessons may stand you in good stead as you live in the crucible of ministry

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Have you ever been given simplistic spiritual advice that has proven to be ineffectual in your struggle with porn. Perhaps you have given simplistic advice. In this episode Vern talks about the proper way to approach (and give advice) about how to find a life of freedom from Porn.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

One of the biggest challenges in working in the church is that there seems to be such a hesitation to talk about sexuality. In the absense of talk about healthy sexuality it seems that we are left with the idea that sexuality is somehow dirty or the "forbidden fruit".

In this episode I interview Kyle. He is one of a trio of Christian podcast hosts and ministry leaders from KingdomSexualityministry.comwho are seeking to bring talk of healthy sexuality into the open.

To connect with the ministry Kingdom Sexuality you can check them out on their website

https://www.kingdomsexualityministry.com


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Mitch Harrison is a seasoned pastor and leader who has a great gift in helping tired pastors find a new rhythm for their life. This podcast is all about helping you create a new way of living that will help find a pattern of healthy self care for your life. If you follow some of the suggestions in this podcast it will greatly increase the odds of thriving - not just surviving in ministry.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Gratitude is a huge tool in my recovery. In this episode I share some of the things that I regularly remind myself of - things that my recovery has brought into my life!


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

In this episode Vern uses tries his hand at some allegorical preaching by sharing the parallels between God's command to drive out the enemies of Canaan and our need to drive out the enemies (such as porn) from our lives.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Self Care is a huge part of recovery and many Pastors think this is something less than spiritual. In this episode I challenge all those in ministry to actually practice a yearly holiday as part of a self care regimen. (I don't mean a week here or there!)


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Have you had the experience of having a family member go through a marriage breakup? In this painful episode, Vern discusses the ripples that spread out when someone you love go through a painful breakup and ask "Is there any lessons we can learn?"


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Have you ever been shoehorned into a particular definition of being spiritual that doesn't work for your wiring. In this episode Vern talks about how we need to find our own rhythm of being spiritual - even if it means not journalling!


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

In this recording from a Sunday morning message Vern asks the question - are you up to the task? Using the text of 2 Timothy 1:7 Vern talks about how God's spirit wants to move us from a posture of fear and timidity to one of power, love, and self discipline.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Looking back on 30 years of pastoral ministry - there are three elements that led me to experience the best version of my pastoral self - three things, that when I strayed from, caused me to fray around the edges.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

What if God wanted us use our story, to leverage it for His glory - even the broken shameful parts. In this episode Vern shares how, rather than hiding our brokenness, God wants to use it in surprising ways.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

How does the idea of becoming fully alive relate to our recovery? From a Sunday morning message, Vern takes us on a journey through Narnia, Wild at Heart and the rock group Evanescense as he explores how the God's promise of "bringing us to life" is at the core of what we all long for.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

In this episode Vern interviews pastor and author Mark Denison who shares about his loss of ministry and how God has turned this loss into a kingdom gain. Mark is the author of "Broken Vessels - Restoring Broken Pastors.

To contact Mark you can reach him at

https://thereisstillhope.org

If you need a safe place to talk - you can also reach out to me (Vern) at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

As we struggle with moving away from embedded porn habits, it is important to make a distinction between the presence of porn and the power of porn. Using Scripture Vern provides hope that although we may still experience the presence of sin, it's power has been broken through Jesus.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Pastors are frequently told that they need to be above reproach (I Timothy 3) What does this actually mean? How does this relate to having a sexual struggle with something like Porn? In this episode Vern tackles that topic.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

How do we make sense of the scriptures that promise us Christian freedom when we still struggle with elements of sin's bondage? This Sunday morning message seeks to bridge that gap by providing hope for freedom - even when we are still not fully experiencing it.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

It is not uncommon to look back at a recent relapse and ask ourself "what was that about?". In this episode Vern seeks to answer that question by exploring what our relapses reveal.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

This episode refers in part to the 80's movie the Mission. Fair warning the movie does have considerable nudity in it as it portrays the life in the tribes of the South American jungle. On the other hand, the book "All is grace" by Brennan Manning contains no nudity!'



I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

I believe that coaching and therapy work super well together. I am a coach not a therapist. I regularly make use of therapists and some therapists have found my approach is a great addition to what they do as well. Recently I was invited to speak to a counseling center and a group of therapists as to how my approach to sexual addictions could work along with their good work. This episode is from that talk

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Gerald May in his great book "Addictions and Grace" says that one of the components of an addiction is the "distortion of reality". In this episode Vern explores how an addiction to porn changes, distorts and warps our view of reality.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Vern has been using Stephen Mansfield's book - Top Ten Signs of a Leadership Crash as the background for a number of recent episodes. In this episode, Vern is excited to interview Stephen for some further thoughts around the need for this book.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

In this episode Vern explores bitterness - one of the key elements in Stephen Mansfield's book "Ten Signs of a Leadership Crash"

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

In this episode Vern explores "Forgetting Fun" - one of the key elements in Stephen Mansfield's book "Ten Signs of a Leadership Crash"


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Is there a "gap" between your private self and your public persona. This episode based on the book "Ten Signs of a Leadership Crash" talks about how that gap is especially problematic for those of us who struggle with sexual purity and are in ministry.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

This is a part episode taken from a longer conversation on my Podcast - Finding Traction episode 54 where Vern interviews Australian sex therapist Monica Cook. This podcast is simply about the part of the conversation where Monica presents a different take on Jesus and the woman caught in adultery.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

In this episode Vern explores the lack of close friendships - one of the key elements in Stephen Mansfield's book "Ten Signs of a Leadership Crash"


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

In this episode Vern explores Isolation - one of the key elements in Stephen Mansfield's book "Ten Signs of a Leadership Crash"


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

As a pastor what is appropriate to tell about my sexual struggles? In this episode we explore that question - a question that most of us struggle with in our desire to be open with our lives but also the desire to protect ourselves.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

In this episode Vern interview Jonathan Daugherty the author of the book Grace Based Recovery. They discuss the ways, good and bad, that people try to help others walk free from porn.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://www.bandofbrothers.care

If you want to connect with Jonathan and the Be Broken Ministry site you can check them out at

https://www.bebroken.org

There are a number of ways that churches react to the information that a pastor is actively engaged in some form of sexual sin. In this episode Vern explores a number of those approaches (both helpful and not so helpful) and proposes a model to use in dealing with these situations.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Our preaching can have unintended consequences. In this episode Vern asks the question - in our desire to help people with sexual issues are we in fact creating a culture of shame?

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Our preaching can come with unintended consequences. In this episode Vern asks are we, despite our good intentions, actually creating more of a porn culture in how we are training our people to view sexuality?


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

This is a short sermon from the story of Naaman that could be used in any recovery setting to look at how our approach to God either encourages our recovery/healing or causes us to move away from it.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

In this episode Vern interviews the authors of the Beautiful Ugly Truth who share a story of how brought healing into the sexal brokenness in their marriage.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Mark and Gwen Brague's book the Beautiful Ugly Truth can be purchased on Amazon

In order for us to continue our embedded use of porn we need to continually tell ourselves a number of lies. In this episode Vern interviews recovery coach John Doyel as they explore these lies.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Ever considered yourself misogynistic? Most of us would not consider ourselves in this light. In this episode Vern explores the uncomfortable truth about how our porn use may be changing us more than we think.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Why do churches fail to lean into difficult topics like sexual brokenness? It affects us all yet we pretend that we are above it all and our churches are above it all. In this episode Vern explores some of the reasons for our "failure to lean"

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

There is an entire movement under the banner of "Sex Positive" which has pushed against the Christian sex ethic as being harmful and repressive. In this episode Vern pushes back on some of the teaching by discussing how "Sex Postive" is far from "sex positive".

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Dr Laura Nelson is a pastor who works with couples who are struggling with sexual brokenness. In this episode she describes some of the things she has learned along with way.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

One of the biggest questions in dealing with sexually broken people is how do we discern between true and false repentance? In this episode we discuss that difficult topic.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://www.bandofbrothers.care

Repentance is a word you hear alot about in the church. What is it and how do we approach this topic when we are struggling (despite our best efforts) to quit looking at porn?

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

In the last podcast we introduced the idea of being a conflicted pastor when it comes to being used by God. Today we turn to the other side - what is it like to be a non-conflicted pastor?

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

in this first part of a two part series Vern explores the idea of being conflicted vs. being non-conflicted in our ministry as a pastor.

In this episode he interviews Darrel Brazzell about his own conflicted journey with sexual brokenness and how God has both changed his life and used him to help other men.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

I (Vern) have been immensely helped by having a recovery coach. In this episode Vern interviews one of his mentors, Michael Leahy, as to the role that coaching can play in your recovery.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Can God still use me despite my ongoing struggles to walk completely free from behaviors like porn? In this episode Vern interviews Matt Cline and they discuss that topic.

Matt is the Director of Restored Ministries and can be reached at

https://www.restoredministries.ca


I (Vern) ove to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Probably my favorite porn recovery book is Surfing for God by Michael Cusick. In this episode I am honored to interview the author.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

What is the biggest lie we need to tell ourselves to continue our porn use? In this episode Vern (in a round about way) gets there!


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

One of my favorite recovery podcasts is the Pirate Monks podcast. In this episode I am honored to interview the two hosts of the podcast - Nate and Aaron


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Be Broken is a ministry to bring sexual healing to the entire family. This includes groups for men, weekend intensives and support for women.

In this episode Vern interviews Jonathan Daugherty, the director as they talk about some of the ways you can find help


We are so blessed in that there are so so many more resources than there were 10 years ago.

Be broken ministries can be contacted at

https://www.bebroken.org

I l(Vern) ove to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

The pull towards porn impacts us differently as we age. In this episode we talk about the false promises that porn offers us at different stages of our life.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Zach Williams is a well known Christian artists who has some great recovery songs based on his own journey. In this episode Vern shares some of the songs he has found inspirational in his recovery journey.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Joe Beam is a sexologist who leads a ministry that works with broken couples. In this episode he shares about some of his thoughts about how to provide hope and healing for couples on the brink of divorce.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Recovery is, among other things, a journey home. In this episode Vern explores the topic of how moving away from porn and addictive living makes sense only if we are returning to a place of true safety and belonging - in other words HOME!

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

One of Vern's brothers from another podcast is his friend Matt Dobscheutz. In this episode Matt joins Vern as the they talk about Matt's story and the way God has used him to help other men.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

The Corona Virus poses not just a major health to our society but a recovery threat to those who already are isolated because of our porn behaviors. The last thing we need is more isolation! In this episode Vern talks about these challenges but also proposes some opportunities that may be in this season as well.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

The Pure Desire podcast is one of those podcasts that has been very helpful to me on my journey away from porn. In this episode we interview the two hosts of the podcasts - Trevor Winsor and Nick Stumbo.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

One of the theological arguments that come up in Christian circles has to do with our identity. Are we fundamentally sinners or saints? Maybe we are both. In this episode Vern explores that questions and explains why it really matters how we examine this question.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Ever had the experiencing of noticing an extremely attractive girl in church? Ever had the experience of this happening while you are preaching! This is one of those true confession episodes that most of us don't like to talk about!

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Have you ever wondered how the need to feel powerful is linked to our pull towards porn. In this episode Vern explore the linkages between the deisre to be powerful and the lure of porn.

I (Vern) love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://www.bandofbrothers.care

Tony Ingrassia is the podcast host of the Power of Purity podcast. In this episode Vern concludes his discussion with Tony around his recovery journey.


I (Vern) love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Tony Ingrassia is the podcast host of the Power of Purity podcast. In part one of this episode Vern begins his discussion with Tony around his recovery journey.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://www.bandofbrothers.care

Ever heard of the concept of tipping point? It is a concept where a number of small steps come together and suddenly something more significant happens. In this episode Vern talks about some of the things that contributed to his tipping point in his recovery from embedded porn habits.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://www.bandofbrothers.care

You probably are familiar with the term "having an epiphany". On this Ephiphany Sunday Vern shares some of the epiphanies that he has experienced on his recovery journey.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Is God angry with me or supremely disappointed because of my struggle with porn? Today's episode is all about God and our struggles, spiritual shame and the posture necessary to find healing in our relationship with God.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://www.bandofbrothers.care

If we are going to last for any amount of time in our pastoral roles we are going to need resilience. In the second part of this topic Vern continues this discusion.

I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

If we are going to last for any amount of time in our pastoral roles we are going to need resilience. In the first part of this topic Vern shares some thoughts around resilience and how this relates to our recovery journey.



I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

A three legged stool is a metaphor often used to descirbe a stable thing - such as a stable ministry. There are actually 3 components to be an effecitve pastor - and our problematic sexual behaviors impede and impair our ability to do them effectively. In this episode Vern explores this in relation to our ability to be a leader of men.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://www.bandofbrothers.care

A three legged stool is a metaphor often used to descirbe a stable thing - such as a stable ministry. There are actually 3 components to be an effecitve pastor - and our problematic sexual behaviors impede and impair our ability to do them effectively. In this episode Vern explores this in relation to our ability to preach and communicate effectively


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

A three legged stool is a metaphor often used to descirbe a stable thing - such as a stable ministry. There are actually 3 components to be an effecitve pastor - and our problematic sexual behaviors impede and impair our ability to do them effectively. In this episode Vern explores this in relation to our ability to be "with" people.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

There is a line in an old DC Talk song "what if I stumble, whati if I fail". It is a sobering fear that most sexual strugglers in ministry face. In this episode we talk about that lingering fear.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

One of the most mis-applied words in Christian-ese - is the word "Accountability". In this episode we talk about how this word is misued and a proper application of the word.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Why do some people stay mired in their addiction while others find the traction needed to gain momentum in their recovery journey? Episode 6 is all about finding traction in your journey

If you want to connect with Vern directly - there is now a new email that will take you directly to him

email: bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

If you want to check out more about him or the finding traction course go to the website:

https://www.bandofbrothers.care

What if our brokenness - and in particular our struggle with it - was actually a "gift" to us in terms of potentially being used by God? In this episode we explore that thought.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

One of the most common questions I get asked (by both Pastors and non-pastors) is this one
"should Pastors who struggle with Porn leave the ministry?" In this episode we explore that question.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

Are there unique reasons as to why Pastors struggle with porn (in the first place) and why they remain in these destructive behaviors. This episode explores those reasons.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

I have been a pastor for 30 years. In this story I describe how my life of embedded porn intersected with God's call on my life to live a life of fruitfulness. We all have a story and it gives us a platform to speak into the lifes of others who have struggled in similar ways. Welcome to my story.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care

What is Pastors on Porn about - well this first episode outlines the reasons why I started the podcast and who it is aimed to help.


I love to talk to Pastors - especially those who are looking to deal with their unmanageable sexual behaviors.

If you need a safe place to talk - you can reach out to me at

bandofbrothers.care@gmail.com

You can also see some more resources on my website

https://bandofbrothers.care