The Parent Squad

When your children are young, how much money mum and dad have probably isn't on their mind. But as kids get older, they understand what's "expensive" and what's cheap, and with that brings questions. 

"Mum, so-and-so's parents take them to Rarotonga every year, why don't we do that?" 

So how do you navigate these conversations? Founder of Crayon Stephanie Pow joins Tim Beveridge on Parent Squad to discuss. 

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We often think of being engaged in our children's education as pitching in with after school activities, or making sure you turn up to the parent-teacher days.

But if your kid comes home every day complaining about a teacher, or the way a course is taught, who do you talk to? What warrants a conversation with the school? 

Auckland Boys' Grammar School Headmaster Tim O'Connor joins Tim Beveridge to discuss how parents can make sure they're staying on top of their children's educaion. 

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Road rage is something we are all guilty of indulging in. But if you lose your cool in front of your kids, it can cause some unwanted side effects. 

Mindworks Psychologist Sara Chatwin joins Tim Beveridge to discuss when to show your emotions in front of your kids, and when to keep yourself in check.

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We all need to have that talk with our kids, but it's probably the one you want to have least. The Sex talk. 

Everyone remembers when their parents told them about the birds and the bees, and now it's time to pass your wisdom on to your own kids. So how can you go about it without making them - or yourself - too uncomfortable?

Dr. Miriam McCaleb joins Tim Beveridge to discuss. 

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Parents can now know where their child is, read school portals, monitor screen time, track devices, and see bank transactions.

We are the first generation of parents capable of knowing almost everything our teenagers are doing. But just because we can track our kids, should we be doing it?

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Extracurricular activities are important for our children's development - but there's a balance that needs to be found. So how do you encourage your kids to try everything, without it being too much? 

And parents want to get on with their kids. Be invested in their interests, help them follow what they want to do - but are other key aspects of parenting being sacrificed as parents try to be friends with their kids? 

Parenting Coach Sheridan Eketone from Parenting Place joins Tim Beveridge to discuss. 

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10,000 Kiwi kids left school without any qualifications last year. No parent wants their kid to end up in that situation, so how do you guide them towards picking a successful career?

And when is the time to get your kids to start thinking about their future career? Mindworks psychologist Sara Chatwin joins Tim Beveridge on The Parent Squad to discuss.

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Parenting styles naturally evolve through the decades but in the 21st century it seems social media is accelerating these changes.

'Gentle Parenting' has been a huge topic of discussion in online parenting circles, but have we gone too far and lost the ability to create and enforce boundaries?

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ACT's David Seymour has floated the idea of a smartphone ban for under-16s to replace a social media ban, allowing teenagers to only use good old brick phones.

Could this be a good alternative to the social media ban, or should this not be government decision?

John Cowan joins Tim Beveridge for The Parenting Squad to discuss. 

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What happens if my child starts befriending or dating someone I'm really not a fan of. How do I protect them from getting played or getting into a toxic relationship?

When should we interfere with our children's personal lives? When and how do we put our foot-down and say "no, you can't hang out with this person"

How do we do that with respectful authority, that strikes a balance between making sure you're not ruling with an iron fist, and that our kids understand where we're coming from?

Mindworks' Registered Psychologist Sara Chatwin joins Tim Beveridge to unpack what can be done.

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Founder of Crayon Stephanie Pow joins Tim Beviredge on Parent Squad to discuss how you should monitor your kids' pocket money. When's the right time to get them started? And how much control should parents have to veto kids' purchases?

But is it all up to parents to teach kids about cash? Or do schools have a responsibility to help out. 

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Paediatrician Maneesh Deva joins Tim Beviredge on Parent Squad to discuss the social media ban for kids under 16. One girl in the UK said she would simply stare at a wall without social media, but is that such a bad thing?

And what do teens need for positive brain development? And what should be dodged?

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Author and host of Real Life John Cowan joined Tim Beveridge to chat about whether you should teach your kids to drive or leave it to the professionals. 

And tips and tricks for if you decide to self-instruct your teens. 

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Have you ever considered why we tell our kids to 'be themselves' when sticking out from the crowd can make you the subject of bullying?

Umbrella Wellbeing CEO and psychologist Dr Dougal Sutherland joined Tim Beveridge to chat about the balances of supporting our children and allowing them to stand on their own. 

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Parents are acting up on the sidelines of their children's games in the mighty Waikato leading to youth rugby league games cancelled last Sunday after reports of physical and verbal abuse in Hopuhopu.

Sport Waikato CEO Matthew Cooper said the problem is felt worldwide, with parents wanting to achieve through their children.

What behaviour is okay at your children's sports games? When does support cross into abuse?

MindWorks psychologist Sara Chatwin joined Tim Beveridge to discuss.

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The cost of having or raising a child is often the most considered issue among couples planning to start or grow their family. 

It's not just the shopping trips for prams and cots and nappies - it's the income loss over the months of parental leave and the endless sick days once daycare starts up. 

Plunket estimates a medium-budget cost for raising a child for the first year comes to just under $16,000. That works out to a whole lot of sacrifice. 

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There's a new trend sweeping through social media - when your child is lost in a tantrum or a pre-teen spiral, you call out for your imaginary helper named Jessica, and more often than not it will confuse them enough to stop them in their tracks. 

Distraction methods like this one have been used for years and years, but why do they work? 

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Doctors are seeing an increasing number of young people coming in with unexplained symptoms. 

The prominent ones parents are probably seeing most frequently are the random headaches, stomach aches, difficulty sleeping or sleeping too much. 

Parents will often treat their children with panadol and electrolytes, take their devices away before bed to avoid blue light, and hope the problem resolves itself.

But these are all common signs something more could be going on - different ways mental health problems present physically. 

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You always hear stories about the different ways a person's childhood has had an ongoing impact throughout their life. 

There are some horrible stories out there, but it could even just be the way your parents would cook growing up, or how the way they would react to you relaxing results in habits that follow you into adulthood.  

So at the end of the day, are we all doomed to mess up our children in one way or another? 

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It's school holidays, and boredom is setting in...

While it can send parents into a bit of a spiral hearing their children complain about how bored they are all day long - being bored is one of those skills we all need to learn at some point. 

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Our children are becoming increasingly involved in politics and current events, and they're getting involved younger and younger. 

We want to support their interests, but the news can get pretty dark, and these kinds of events or protests always come with a risk of danger. 

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Social media giants Meta and YouTube have been found liable for deliberately designing their platforms to be addictive. 

We don't need to look too far into the details of this specific trial, because parents everywhere will have stories of their own to some extent, but how much of the blame falls on the parents? There are countless things in the modern world that young people risk becoming addicted to - they don't even have to appear sinister. Food, sugar, video games, any number of apps - social media or otherwise. 

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Most kids will take part in some kind of sport throughout their childhood. 

It's a great opportunity to keep them moving and allow them to burn off some energy, but how early should we be getting our children into these teams?

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Kids push limits - it's just what they do. 

From as early as the toddler years, it's completely developmentally normal for children to figure out just how for they can push their parents before a very clear line is drawn - but what about those times where behaviour you never would have imagined doing yourself as a child rears its head?

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Early childhood education is darn expensive. 

You want your kids to socialise, make friends, learn some basics - but it costs an arm and a leg. 

So how long can you put it off?

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Whether it's a friend, your own parents, or you may be going through it yourself - we've all heard the question of whether a couple should 'stay together for the kids'. 

Realistically, a divorce does have a significant impact on children, even if they're prioritised and not put in the middle of it.

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Child safety reform in the world of big tech is sweeping the globe at the moment. 

Australia's leading the charge in the social media ban for under 16s, and California has expanded the Coogan Law to cover child influencers, to name a few. 

Although we haven't seen any change here in New Zealand, the conversation has truly started and we may see moves being made soon. 

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Many parents will be starting to feel the exhaustion from getting back into school and extracurriculars. 

We often go into the new year with high expectations of ourselves - like completely homemade school lunches, no takeout, keeping on top of house work - but quickly realise there was a reason we weren't accomplishing all that last year. 

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A new report this week found nearly 90% of Auckland primary school say there's an increasing number of new entrants starting school without bare basic skills like being toilet trained and talking properly.

These are 5 year olds who are otherwise capable, but some stage of their early childhood seems to have been neglected - they can't even identify the letters of their name or hold a pencil. 

As harsh as it may be, the blame does have to land somewhere. 

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Schools have started back up and we all, obviously, want our children to do well. 

Parents will be doing drop off and pick up, making sure the homework is done and forms are signed, keeping an eye on grades and reports. 

But how involved should parents really be in their children's education?

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One of the hottest topics of the modern era is kids and smartphones. As we've seen more of the what the internet can do (for better or worse) they seem like an essential part of life. Wallet, Keys, Phone, that's what you always keep on you. 

A first phone is typically only for texting mum and dad, so why do you need a device that has the capability for so much more? 

Child Psychologist Sara Chatwin joins Tim Beveridge to give her advice on when to let kids get their own devices and how to manage them.

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NCEA results are officially out.

Most kids would have genuinely worked as hard as they could to get the grades they hoped for - even the kids who act like they don't really care. 

And for many it won't have turned out as hey had planned - whether that meant not quite meeting the dizzying heights of their ambition or an actual fail grade. But it's unavoidable - at some stage through their school career - and life for that matter, most of us have to deal with the disappointment of failure.

They need to learn how to deal with that disappointment - but it will of course still be there, so how are parents supposed to help their children through it?

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We've all seen the videos - we may have even seen it in our own living rooms on Christmas morning... 

A child, even teenager, opens a gift their loved one has especially picked out for them, and they proceed to complain about how it's not the one they wanted. 

The wrong colour bicycle, wrong model phone, it could be anything. 

So how do we teach our children to be grateful for anything they're given this Christmas? 

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What are the essential life skills our kids truly need to know before they head out into the real world? 

How often to wash their sheets, how to cook a basic meal, managing bills and payments, doing laundry without turning their white shirts pink - these are things that most of us learnt well before we moved out, but they don't seem to be as common today. 

Only 21% of parents of children aged 5-17 years say their kids are often involved with cooking. That's 79% of kids that will likely leave home not knowing how to cook much more than a toasted cheese. 

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In just a few days, a law banning the use of social media for under 16s will take effect in Australia. 

For many parents, social media has been a daily part of family life for years - allowing kids to stay connected with their friends and family, sharing life updates with people they may not get a chance to speak with very often. 

Generations before have been relatively ignorant to just how seriously harmful it can be - figuring if they just keep open communication with their kids then they should be fine. 

But younger millennial and gen Z parents seem to be recognising the dangers, and most often opting to keep their kids offline. 

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The school year is drawing to an end and soon enough, families will be filling school halls and gymnasiums for the end-of-year prizegiving. 

For the star students or athletes, it's a moment of pride to walk across the stage and receive a well-earned award. For others, the whole thing can feel demoralising. 

Never mind the awards themselves - there are clear differences between some, like the dean's award and the most improved. 

But on the other hand, do we really want to be handing out participation awards? Are they inclusive or are they encouraging mediocrity? 

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Summer holidays is just around the corner and kids will be rushing out the door to spend as much time as they can with their friends. 

But this time of year is often the longest period that parents will be able to spend time at home with the family. 

We don't want to pull our children away from their friends, but we also want to instil the value of family time. 

So where do we draw the line between family time and friend time for our children this summer?

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We live in a near cashless world these days. Hardly anyone has anything further than a couple cards, or even just Apple Pay. 

We all remember a time we'd get a gold coin for washing mum's car, or a couple notes for chopping wood, but those days seem to be gone. 

How are parents going about pocket money without cash? Are we really giving our kids bank cards, and how young is too young? 

And if money's not the right reward, are things a better deal for our children? Is it acceptable to fill up their gas tank in return for chores? 

And going a bit deeper into this - what counts as a chore that should be compensated for, and what are the jobs they should be doing simply for being a part of the household? 

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We're on the brink of exam season and a lot of families are feeling the pressure. 

As parents we can prepare our kids to study as much as we want, but there are other areas they will need support in. 

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We all know the dangers of tech these days, but it's unavoidable. 

Our kids need a laptop for school, an iPad to pass the time, and a phone for parents to reach them on. 

There are positives to technology, we just need to teach our children to take advantage of the good things their devices have to offer. 

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Should you stay together for the kids? 

A lot of the time it does more harm than good - and countless adults will tell you they wished their parent had split when they were children. 

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Many parents wrestle with the balance of keeping their kids involved with extracurriculars, while also teaching them the value of rest in a world that prioritises the daily hustle. 

We're signing them up to every opportunity possible to help them develop as people, but are our kids just too busy? 

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We hear lots of horror stories about parenting - from the accidents that cost us a hefty bill, the arguments and bickering we bump into as they get older, the worries about our what they're doing when we're away, and the concerns of how social media's affecting their mental health.

But we do it because we love them - unconditionally. And part of that is having to embrace the numerous versions of people they grow up to be. So what are the moments and things that make all the stress melt away for you, and reminds why being a parent's all worth it?

Parenting Expert, and host of The Real Life, John Cowan joins Tim Beveridge for the Parent Squad...

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Our kids are growing up, and with that comes the parental obligation to allow them to start making decisions for themselves. 

This come after we saw the story of the Gaza Flotilla and an interview with the father of Sam Leason, an 18 year old who was a part of the recent flotilla to Gaza. 

I think regardless of your views, most parents would be pretty hesitant to allow their teenager to head off into a warzone. But truly, at 18, what can we really do? 

How much guidance should parents be giving their kids once they reach those older years?

Psychologist at MindWorks Sara Chatwin joined Tim Beveridge on The Parent Squad. 

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It's that time of the year when many high school kids are having to make choices when it comes to subject options, perhaps some of which will determine what choices they have in future careers. 

So how can parents support their children through the choice process? 

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Students are dropping out of high school at the highest rate since 2007. 

It's become fairly accepted in recent years that you don't need a diploma or a degree to be successful in life, but many parents will still be concerned if their child comes to them wanting to leave early. 

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Around 96.8% of children in New Zealand attend some sort of Early Childhood Education at some point before entering school. 

Some begin right from a few months old, while some are only enrolled at 2 or 3 for kindergarten. 

But why is ECE so important? 

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Parenting in the modern world comes with a slew of challenges - not just in terms of technology and social media, but the people who have influence over your children. 

The majority of those born into Generation Z or earlier looked up to sports tars, actors, and the like. But today, it's whoever the public finds interesting enough to follow online. 

Whether it's a good or a bad thing, raising children in a modern world seems to bring more problems than parents have experienced in the past few decades. 

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Literacy and numeracy rates in New Zealand are still shameful compared to other countries in the OECD. 

23% of year 8 students are at the curriculum benchmark for maths following recent curriculum changes from the Government, up from 22% in 2023. 

Teachers in recent years have put the blame on parents, saying kids are starting school without the basics. 

Harpreet Singh is the founder of SIP Abacus New Zealand, and he joins for Parent Squad. 

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The first 1,000 days are the most important in any child's life - to set the foundation for a well-rounded and stable adulthood. 

A key part of those first 1,000 days is early attachment, the importance of forming healthy attachments, and what that means for children as they grow up. 

Nathan Wallis is a neuroscience educator and he joins to discuss early attachment.

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Principal psychologist at Umbrella Wellbeing Dougal Sutherland joins Tim Beveridge to discuss whether it's ever okay to discipline a child that isn't yours. 

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In the past week there have been multiple incidents at youth and school sports games, all involving bad sideline behaviour from parents. 

John Cowan joins Tim Beveridge for the Parent Squad. 

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There comes a time in every parent's life when your sweet child comes home one day and announces they're in a relationship. 

What boundaries and conversations should parents have when this time comes? 

Psychologist at MindWorks, Sara Chatwin, joins Tim Beveridge for Parent Squad. 

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Kids these days are far more tech savvy than previous generations, but does that really help them stay safer online? 

Tim Beveridge is joined by Principal Psychologist at Umbrella Wellbeing, Dougal Sutherland, for Parent Squad. 

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Kids can eventually turn a corner where they get a bit more stubborn when it comes to listening to us.

Sometimes it's just them being cheeky, sometimes it's a bit rude, sometimes it's just a miscommunication.

But how do you stay boss in the relationship? Should you even do it or is it something to worry about?

Tim Beveridge is joined by Family and Parent Coach Jenny Hale for Parent Squad...

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With the school holidays and dreary weather - kids are likely to be glued to their rooms and screens.

How can we change that? What can we do to keep them busy while we're at work?

Additionally, with recent floods across the country - how can we help our children dealing with the experience?

Psychologist Sara Chatwin joins Andrew Dickens for the Parent Squad...

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How can you teach accountability to your children?

What ways can a lesson go too far?

Parent teacher interviews - what questions should we be asking our teachers?

Tim Beveridge is joined by Education Expert Sandy Pasley...

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What happens inside a child's brain when they're having a meltdown?

How should we approach their struggles?

Tim Beveridge is joined by Neuroscience Educator Nathan Wallis. 

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Tim Beveridge is joined by Parenting Expert John Cowan to talk about in-laws problems, and side-line behaviour.

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Tim Beveridge is joined by Principal Psychologist at Umbrella Wellbeing, Dougal Sutherland. 

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We trust schools with the bulk of what our children are taught - and it makes sense, since they spend the majority of their time there. 

But are we delegating the raising of our children too much to schools?

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How much is social media affecting children's mental health?

When does a child need counselling services, and how do you approach a discussion about getting over a relationship?

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A nine year old boy was told he's too fat to play rugby this week, sparking a major debate. 

But really, kids do tend to grow out before up - so when is it an issue, and how do you discuss it with them?

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The National Party have proposed a bill to ban social media for under 16 year olds - following Australia's lead. 

But do parents really need legislative support with things like this? And how much help is really needed? 

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All teenagers have their moments - but what are the signs there's something seriously wrong? And how much of the teenage angst can be blamed on parents expecting to have a horrible teen?

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It takes a village - parents, caregivers, family, and community. It takes a bit from everyone to raise successful adults. 

Parents will do their best to instil particular values into their children - but as we slowly let go as they progress through their schooling, it's unavoidable that others will begin to have a say. 

So in terms of values, what is the role of parents and schools as children grow up?

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This week on The Parent Squad, neuroscience educator Kathryn Berkett revealed how much - if at all - you should get involved with your children's friendships.

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Senior Parent Coach Jenny Hale discusses the importance of resilience in parents. 

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Combining two families under one roof can be hard at the best of times. 

Whether a couple are both bringing kids from a previous marriage together, or someone is becoming a step parent having never had kids before. 

But what happens when there are disagreements between the couple? What if a step parents thinks their stepchild should move out when he turns 18? 

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Midwife Grace Strange joins the show to discuss birth plans vs reality.

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All parents send their children to school with the hopes of high results and great values, but which are they prioritising? 

Special character schools are significantly different from the public school system - and state schools may have a few things to learn.

Rockley Montgomery is the principal of Vanguard Military School and he joins to discuss the place that character schools hold in the education system. 

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Neuroscience educator Kathryn Berkett joins to discuss how to kick your kids out - the right way. 

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Psychologist Dougal Sutherland joins Tim Beveridge to discuss how parents should handle the pressure to treat their children equally. 

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Parents nationwide are saying goodbye to their kids as they set off to university, their OE, or countless other adventures. 

It leaves the parents with an unusually quiet home - so how do they deal with it?

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The number of anxiety diagnoses is becoming increasingly more common in newer generations. 

Dr Leila Masson, paediatrician and author of Children's Health A to Z, says children are put in a difficult position with the rising popularity of social media. 

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The Youth Development Strategy Aotearoa (YDSA) recognised six key principles to support the positive development of teens and tweens. 

Understanding, connection, and relationships are just some of the focal points found to be essential for resilient and thriving young adults. 

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All children have their quirks - especially coming into the teenage years. 

But when does it cross the line from awkwardness to potentially needing some extra support? 

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Prince William himself recently admitted that when asked what they had learnt at school that day, his children respond with "nothing". 

But how much of the anxiety around change is really coming from the child, and how much is being projected onto the child by their parents? 

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Statistics from Auckland Hospital show there has been a dramatic increase in women requesting c-sections in recent year, but a drop in women actually getting elective c-sections. 

The number also show an unfortunate increase in emergency c-sections. 

Grace Strange is a midwife and founder of Antenatal Co., and she joins with more.

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NCEA exam results have been released, and many students are less than pleased with how they did. 

Every parent wants their child to be their best, but how can they push their children to improve without destroying their self confidence?

As parents deal with the fallout from exam results, many have had to return to work while school holidays drag on. 

With only 20 days of annual leave, how can parents manage to find or afford childcare for the longest school break of the year?

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Family arguments are more common than not over the holiday period - but when is it time to step in when it comes to relatives making comments to children? 

John Cowan joins to discuss. 

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School prizegivings can be a chore this time of year, along with the increasing popularity of participation awards - but the burning question is whether these are helping or harming children. 

Dougal Sutherland joins with more. 

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Parents nationwide have one question on their minds this time of year - how on earth they can get their kids out of the house and off their devices once school finishes up for the year. 

Also, are parents teaching their children how to be over-consumers and materialistic by over-gifting at Christmas, and what is the limit when it comes to presents? 

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Most parents hate seeing their children in stressful situations, regardless of what the cause is - but there may be an argument for allowing them to experience the stress. 

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With the year drawing to a close, teenagers are finishing up with school and leaving home. 

Holly Brooker joins to discuss how parents can best support their children through the transition, and when it's time to give them a gentle nudge. 

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How involved should you allow your children to become in politics? What warnings should you give them? 

Psychologist Sara Chatwin joins to discuss this and more. 

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With exam season just around the corner, John Cowan joins Tim Beveridge to let you know how you can help your children in the lead-up. 

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Most children reach a point in their pre-teen or teenage years when they grow more self aware, they begin to make comments that are critical of themselves. 

Dougal Sutherland joins Tim Beveridge to discuss how parents should respond to these comments to avoid worsening their self-image. 

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Recent studies from the United States show how detrimental being a parent can be to your mental health. 

Tim Beveridge is joined by Parenting Place CEO Dave Atkinson to discuss how to maintain your mental health with children. 

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Neuroscience Educator Nathan Wallis joins Tim Beveridge on The Weekend Collective to discuss the harms of helicopter parenting and how to raise resilient kids.

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Children will often insist on having music or a TV show playing in the background while they study, but how distracting is it really?

Also, how are single parents able to cope with all the decision making and responsibilities they have to do alone?

Neuroscience trainer Kathryn Berkett joins Tim Beveridge to discuss this and more. 

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Parents often feel pressured to have the school holidays fully booked with activities and programs, but psychologist Sara Chatwin says that may not be the best thing to do for children. 

Sara joins Tim Beveridge on The Weekend Collective to discuss this and more. 

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Parenting expert John Cowan joins Tim Beveridge on The Weekend Collective to discuss the importance of reading to children and how children books have changed over the years. 

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Many parents have grown more hesitant when it comes to posting pictures of their children online. 

The conversation is growing around the dangers of sharing photos and information publicly. 

Parenting expert Holly Brooker joins Tim Beveridge on The Weekend Collective to discuss this and more. 

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Several schools nationwide are considering online learning as a solution to manage poor attendance, teacher shortages, and student mental health. 

Kathryn Berkett joins Tyler Adams on The Weekend Collective to explain why this is a bad idea. 

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A British mum is facing backlash after allowing her 15 year old son to travel Europe with his 16 year old friend. 

The mum acknowledged the danger in this, but said, "in this increasingly risk-averse world it's vital that we find any ways we can to give our children the confidence that only comes from trusting them."

So where do you draw the line? How can you let your children go without giving too much freedom? Dr Dougal Sutherland joins Tim Beveridge on The Weekend Collective to discuss. 

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How do you help your children build healthy habits without taking it too far? 

Kim Harvey joins Tim Beveridge on The Weekend Collective to discuss this and more. 

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How do you balance disciplining your children while still allowing them to choose their own path?

Sara Chatwin joins Tim Beveridge on The Weekend Collective to discuss this and more.

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What do you do when your child is picking school subjects? Do you step in when they want to drop core subjects? 

Parenting expert John Cowan joins Tim Beveridge on The Weekend Collective to discuss this and more. 

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