Black Girls Heal

In this episode, Shena goes over 3 green flags to look for in relationships.

Learn more and work with me at BlackGirlsHeal.org

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In this episode, Shena shares a special announcement and the topic for next week's podcast episode.

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In this episode, Shena talks about the 12 types of wounds we can have that are actually our greatest gifts, examples of how it may show up in our life, and how to heal them.

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Break the cycle of love addiction with The Recovery School: Click here to join

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Get the free roadmap to break out of love addiction: Click here to download

Find us elsewhere:

BlackGirlsHeal.orgInstagram: @blackgirlshealTiktok: @blackgirlshealYouTube: Black Girls Heal with Shena Lashey

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In this episode, Shena goes over what Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria from ADHD looks like in individuals and how it overlaps with common themes discussed under love addiction and trauma recovery.

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In this episode, Shena reviews 5 ways the right partner will be there to support you.

Keep track of your relationships and find your perfect match using our Perfect Match Tracker: Click here to get it

Break the cycle of love addiction with The Recovery School: Click here to join

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Get the free roadmap to break out of love addiction: Click here to download

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BlackGirlsHeal.orgInstagram: @blackgirlshealTiktok: @blackgirlshealYouTube: Black Girls Heal with Shena Lashey

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In this episode, Shena breaks down the 6 pillar S.A.C.R.E.D. framework for Healed and Loved Woman. This framework details the main focuses of Healed and Loved Women and how they center and prioritize themselves in their everyday life.

Download the free Loved Woman Checklist: Click here to download

Break the cycle of love addiction with The Recovery School: Click here to join

Join our free text community: Click here to join

Get the free roadmap to break out of love addiction: Click here to download

Find us elsewhere:

BlackGirlsHeal.orgInstagram: @blackgirlshealTiktok: @blackgirlshealYouTube: Black Girls Heal with Shena Lashey

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In this episode, Shena reviews 5 ways Healed and Loved Women can be open to love.

Break the cycle of love addiction with The Recovery School: Click here to join

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In this episode, Shena discusses ways to work through passive agressive communication defenses in relationships when healing from love addiction.

Break the cycle of love addiction with The Recovery School: Click here to join

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Get the free roadmap to break out of love addiction: Click here to download

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In this episode, Shena review faith based beliefs that unknowingly keep love addicts stuck.

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In this episode, Shena discusses common red flags to look out for in lesbian relationships for love addicts.

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In this episode, Shena focuses on several signs of codependency in family relationships, how it affects you, and different mindsets to consider to heal and change your patterns.

Break the cycle of love addiction with The Recovery School: Click here to join

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In this episode, Shena reviews 5 types of unavailable men frequently encountered by love addicts before they break the cycle.

Break the cycle of love addiction with The Recovery School: Click here to join

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In this episode, Shena returns from sabbatical and shares all the lessons she has learned from healing her nervous system over the years and where else there is to go!

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What would change if you truly believed you were worthy of love, peace, and care?

In this episode of the Black Girls Heal Podcast, I am inviting you into a deeper conversation about self-love, emotional healing, and reconnecting with the relationship you have with yourself.

Through guided reflection, journaling prompts, and future-self visualization, you'll explore the beliefs, experiences, and relationships that have shaped your sense of worth. This episode is designed to help you slow down, nurture yourself, and create space for the version of you that feels more grounded, secure, peaceful, and connected.

In this episode, you'll explore:

✨ Taking an honest inventory of your relationship with yourself

✨ Examining the voices that have shaped your self-worth

✨ Releasing beliefs and relationships that no longer align

✨ Learning how to receive love, support, and affirmation

✨ Defining the future version of yourself you want to become

✨ Visualizing life after healing and inner growth

✨ Giving yourself permission to grow, heal, and evolve

SUMMER SALE — ALL PROGRAMS 50% OFF

Use code: SUMMER50 at checkout

NEXT STEPS TO GO DEEPER

Heal the AcheMother Wound Workshop BundleLove Deprivation RehabBGH MethodThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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In this episode, Shena shares a practical and compassionate roadmap for healing relationship patterns, reconnecting with yourself, and creating healthier experiences in love. Through reflective journaling prompts, grounding exercises, and emotional inventory work, she invites you to use the next 90 days as an opportunity to break unhealthy cycles, strengthen self-trust, and create space for the kind of love and peace you truly desire.

Whether you’re healing from heartbreak, navigating relationship anxiety, or learning how to choose yourself differently, this episode offers gentle yet honest guidance to support your healing journey and next chapter.

Download Summer Sabbatical Homework

Summer Sale Courses Mentioned

BGH MethodHow to Make it Work Between Love Avoidants and Love Addicts (Workshop)Full Course Library

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Join me in the BGH Method for 12 weeks of recovery from love addiction, love avoidance, and the trauma that causes it to get the relationships you want: Click here to learn more

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In this episode, Shena uses Megan Thee Stallion’s recent breakup to unpack critical relationship red flags, including cheating, emotional instability, and “future faking.” She reinforces that a partner’s betrayal is never your fault, and that patterns like mood swings, lack of accountability, and a history of dishonesty are warning signs that shouldn’t be overlooked. This episode serves as a powerful reminder that you are not responsible for fixing or saving anyone, real love is grounded in emotional safety, consistency, and integrity.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

BGH Method: http://www.blackgirlsheal.org/methodThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmap

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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In this episode, Shena explores what it looks like to navigate your healing journey without the support system you wish you had. If you’re in a season where you’ve outgrown certain relationships but haven’t yet found your tribe, this conversation will meet you right where you are.

This episode is a reminder that even if you’re healing alone, you’re not stuck but you’re creating space for the relationships and life you truly desire.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

BGH Method: http://www.blackgirlsheal.org/methodThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmap

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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Your feelings are powerful but they aren’t always telling you the truth. In this episode, I explore why intense emotions can keep you stuck in unhealthy patterns and how giving your feelings structure can help you reclaim your power.

Drawing from my work on the No Contact process, I broke down how emotional overwhelm, trauma bonds, and familiar patterns can make it difficult to walk away from relationships that no longer serve you. You’ll learn how to shift from being led by your feelings to creating balance between your emotional and logical mind so you can make decisions rooted in your highest good.

Whether you’re navigating no contact, healing inner child wounds, or setting boundaries, this episode will help you reframe your relationship with your emotions and move forward with clarity and intention.

Special Offer:

Use code FEELINGS to get $97 off the BGH Method.

This discount applies to both pay-in-full and payment plans.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

BGH Method: http://www.blackgirlsheal.org/methodThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmap

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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In this episode, Shena discussed 3 powerful strengths you gain by taking your power back in no contact.

Free No Contact Cheat Sheets: Click here to download

Resources mentioned in the episode:

BGH Method: http://www.blackgirlsheal.org/methodThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmap

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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In this episode, Shena takes you behind the scenes on writing her latest book on her signature 90 Day No Contact healing process.

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In this episode, Shena shares a powerful live discussion on what it really means to pursue love when life feels overwhelmingly busy, especially if your schedule, past heartbreak, or emotional patterns are holding you back from meaningful connection.

She breaks down the deeper reasons behind “being too busy” for love and offers three transformative mindset shifts - helping you prioritize your emotional well-being, let people in, and redefine relationships as nourishing rather than draining while sharing practical insights you can apply right away to build self-worth and healthier connections.

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In this episode, I go over why your breakup pain hits differently than others, describe the process named "withdrawal," and what you can do about it.

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Breakups are painful.

But when you struggle with love addiction, trauma bonding, or unresolved childhood wounds, breakups can feel devastating, consuming, and nearly impossible to move through.

In this episode, I break down how to navigate heartbreak when your nervous system is deeply activated and your attachment patterns are involved.

This conversation is about compassion and not criticism.

Awareness and not shame.

And breaking generational patterns, not repeating them.

If you relate to symptoms of love addiction, love avoidance, or love deprivation, download our free roadmap.

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Let's talk about how you can be both a love addict and love avoidant at the same time.

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Listen to this if you feel you lost time in your previous relationship

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In this episode, Shena concludes her examination of how to put yourself first using the Loved Woman Checklist.

Click here to download the checklist

Resources Mentioned:

How to Pick Partners for Love Addicts by Shena Lashey

The BGH Method

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In this episode, Shena continues the How To Put Yourself First Series with the Loved Woman Checklist review, Part 3.

Click here to download the checklist

Resources Mentioned:

How to Pick Partners for Love Addicts by Shena Lashey

The BGH Method

Private Coaching Options

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In this episode, I continue into the next set of the foundational steps of learning how to truly put yourself first without guilt, fear, or feeling like you’re letting others down.

Resources mentioned:

The Loved Woman Checklist: https://blackgirlsheal.org/checklist

The BGH Method: https://blackgirlsheal.org/method

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.org

Instagram: @BlackGirlsHeal

TikTok: @blackgirlsheal

Facebook: Black Girls Heal

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In this episode, I dive into the foundational steps of learning how to truly put yourself first without guilt, fear, or feeling like you’re letting others down.

Resources mentioned:

The Loved Woman Checklist: https://blackgirlsheal.org/checklist

The BGH Method: https://blackgirlsheal.org/method

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

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A short Merry Christmas message of gratitude to all members of the BGH listening family!

Join me at in the BGH Members Club: http://www.blackgirlsheal.org/club

Learn the BGH Method in the New Year: http://www.blackgirlsheal.org/method

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In this episode, I review how childhood emotional neglect may show up for youngest daughters in childhood and how it manifests in adulthood.

Resources mentioned:

Heal the Ache of Childhood Emotional Neglect: https://blackgirlsheal.org/neglect

Enter code HEAL20 for 20% off

The BGH Method: https://blackgirlsheal.org/method

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In this episode, I review how childhood emotional neglect may show up for middle daughters in childhood and how it manifests in adulthood.

Resources mentioned:

Heal the Ache of Childhood Emotional Neglect:http://blackgirlsheal.org/neglect

Enter code HEAL20 for 20% off

The BGH Method: http://www.blackgirlsheal.org/method

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Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode, I review how childhood emotional neglect may show up for oldest daughters in childhood and how it manifests in adulthood.

Resources mentioned:

Heal the Ache of Childhood Emotional Neglect:http://blackgirlsheal.org/neglect

Enter codeHEAL20for 20% off

The BGH Method:http://www.blackgirlsheal.org/method

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For those who have felt they have given up much to take care of those in their family and it has become increasingingly overwhelming, this is for you.

Click here to enroll in the BGH Method, our 90 day recovery accelator for love addicts and love avoidants to heal their relationships, unresolved trauma and improve their relationship with themselves

Join the BGH Members Club to get access to worksheets, bonus lessons and more.

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In this episode, Shena explores the three archetypes of love avoidants. She unpacks their unique strengths, their fatal flaws, and what healthy love looks like for each type.

If you’ve ever felt trapped in the same relationship patterns or struggled to understand why love feels so intense yet painful, this episode will help you see yourself with compassion — and give you language to begin your healing journey.

Click here to enroll in the BGH Method, our 90 day recovery accelator for love addicts and love avoidants to heal their relationships, unresolved trauma and improve their relationship with themselves

Join the BGH Members Club to get access to worksheets, bonus lessons and more.

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In this episode, Shena explores the four archetypes of love addicts. She unpacks their unique strengths, their fatal flaws, and what healthy love looks like for each type.

If you’ve ever felt trapped in the same relationship patterns or struggled to understand why love feels so intense yet painful, this episode will help you see yourself with compassion — and give you language to begin your healing journey.

Click here to enroll in the BGH Method, our 90 day recovery accelator for love addicts and love avoidants to heal their relationships, unresolved trauma and improve their relationship with themselves

Join the BGH Members Club to get access to worksheets, bonus lessons and more.

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In this episode, Shena talks about using hope as an act of resistance when everything is not okay around you.

Click here to enroll in the BGH Method, our 90 day recovery accelator for love addicts and love avoidants to heal their relationships, unresolved trauma and improve their relationship with themselves

Join the BGH Members Club to get access to worksheets, bonus lessons and more:

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In this episode, Shena reviews 3 tips to help recovered love addicts and love avoidants foster deep love when you are with your person. The goal is to combat unhealthy patterns you may have brought into your loving relationship to keep the love and connection easy.

Click here to enroll in the BGH Method, our 90 day recovery accelator for love addicts and love avoidants to heal their relationships, unresolved trauma and improve their relationship with themselves

Join the BGH Members Clubto get access to worksheets, bonus lessons and more:

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In this episode, I review what are the things that will make a woman who is in a relationship that is draining her finally leave and what are the things that may make her stay.

Get this week's podcast episode worksheet in our BGH Members Club at http://www.blackgirlsheal.org/club

Break this cycle and step out of this issue with the BGH Method, our 90 recovery program coming soon.

CONNECT WITH US ELSEWHERE

Website: Blackgirlsheal.org

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In this episode, Shena returns refreshed and ready to dive deep into an important and affirming topic: how to recognize when someone actually likes you—and why that clarity matters. She explains that while we often focus on red flags, it’s just as vital to know the green flags of emotional safety, care, and genuine interest. This episode is all about normalizing ease in love and helping women recognize partners who truly value and protect them.

Get this episode's worksheet at in the BGH Member's Club: http://www.blackgirlsheal.org/members

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In this episode, Shena reflects on the consequences and how one's life can be affected if we are connected to those who give red flag behaviors and indicators that they may not be a good match for us emotionally, mentally, or physically (in regards ot safety).

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This episode for anyone who is experiencing or has experienced a friendship breakup that has been hard to recover from. I hope these 7 tips help you move forward and find friendships that help you feel fulfilled and whole.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join the BGH's Members Club: blackgirlsheal.org/membersThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, we're diving into a topic that often brings up complex emotions - recognizing when friendships might be temporary. You know those relationships that feel so intense and meaningful in the moment, but somehow don't stand the test of time? Let's talk about why that happens and why it might actually be perfectly okay.

Through sharing personal stories and insights from my upcoming book 'How to Pick Partners for Love Addicts', we're exploring four key ways to understand the natural ebb and flow of friendships. Whether it's bonding over shared interests, connecting through shared trauma, building relationships in forced environments like work or school, or finding yourself in life transitions - each type of friendship serves its own beautiful purpose.

This isn't about labeling friendships as "less than" because they might be temporary. Instead, we're reframing how we view these connections, understanding that not every friend is meant to be in our lives forever, and that's perfectly okay. From navigating workplace friendships to understanding how religious communities impact our connections, we're getting real about what makes relationships stick or shift.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join the BGH's Members Club: blackgirlsheal.org/membersThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode, we break down how to start creating your own healing circles. 

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join the BGH's Members Club: blackgirlsheal.org/membersThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Why is it so difficult for some women to find and maintain healthy female friendships? Joining me today is Danielle Bayard Jackson, The Friendship Expert, to share more about this topic and to help provide actionable advice to get your friendships back on track, even if they’ve fallen off due to the pandemic. 

Danielle is a publicist by day and a certified friendship coach by night. She started her career as a high school English teacher for many years and was relied upon by her students to help navigate friendship issues. 

What she didn’t realize is that those “high school dramas” weren’t limited to high school. So often the way we approach friendship and relationships in general at a young age, follows us throughout our lives and experiences. 

Friendship like any other relationship requires work and nurturing but after more than a year of limited in-person interaction, it may seem daunting to reconnect. 

Listen as Danielle shares her tips for re-emerging as we reach the end of this pandemic and what you can be doing right now to start working on building new friendships. Remember that there could be people in your existing circle that you’d click with, you just need to give it a chance. 

Also, just because someone doesn’t have the capacity to spend time with you right now does not mean that they aren’t interested in friendship. Don’t let the stories you tell yourself obscure what could be an amazing relationship. 

If you’ve struggled in any way with finding strong female friendships, then you won’t want to miss out on everything Danielle has to share.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join the BGH's Members Club: blackgirlsheal.org/membersThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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In this episode, I talk about managing disappointment from your relationship with your mother as an adult if you have experienced false starts towards intimacy or seen self sabotage on your mother's part.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join the BGH's Members Club: blackgirlsheal.org/membersThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode, Shena discusses how to cope when you have a mother who is competitive with you, the signs of the jealousy and competition, and potential sources of where it may come from.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join the BGH's Members Club: blackgirlsheal.org/membersThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Our mother relationship is our first relationship as we come into this world. As a result, if we have unresolved trauma, it will manifest in how we see ourselves, how we see others, and what we pass down to future generations.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join the BGH's Members Club: blackgirlsheal.org/membersThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of Black Girls Heal, we dive deep into financial codependency—a pattern where you feel obligated to support others financially, even to your own detriment. We explore its roots, how it manifests in various relationships, and the emotional toll it takes. 

You'll learn about practical steps to break free from this cycle, including a 90-day no-contact financial challenge to help reset your finances and reclaim your well-being. We also provide resources to support your journey, including workshops on money trauma and no-contact groups. 

Join us as we focus on reclaiming control, setting healthy boundaries, and prioritizing self-care in your financial life.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join the BGH's Members Club: blackgirlsheal.org/membersThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of Black Girls Heal, we discuss the crucial topic of feeling deserving and why it's essential for receiving the love you desire. We explore how internalizing negative beliefs and trauma can lead to feeling undeserving, even when we outwardly affirm our worth. 

You'll learn practical steps to identify the emotional 'weeds' that choke your growth, including energy-draining relationships and perfectionist tendencies. Additionally, we discuss the importance of self-love, self-compassion, and clearing stored trauma from your body. 

This episode aims to guide you through the first step of the four-step bloom method to help your relationships flourish, ensuring you are on the path to feeling truly deserving of love and happiness.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join the BGH's Members Club: blackgirlsheal.org/membersThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode, Shena discusses healing from codependency to improve your self love and the questions you need to ask yourself to adjust your boundaries.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join the BGH's Members Club: blackgirlsheal.org/membersThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode, Shena discusses how to tell if the connection that you're feeling in a relationship is codependency or compatibility.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join the BGH's Members Club: blackgirlsheal.org/membersThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

When I was dating, I made a lot of mistakes related to how I presented in my intimacy disorders. This week, I'm talking about how my love avoidance showed up for me in my relationships. 

For me, my personal experience and how that connected to my religious education really amplified a lot of my avoidance which is also discussed. 

This episode will not span all of the ways love avoidance can show up in relationships as that as been discussed in previous episodes. But we hope these real experiences will help validate and give solace to the women who need to hear these stories represented. 

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join the BGH's Members Club: blackgirlsheal.org/membersThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode, I review 3 hidden ways we may unknowingly ignore (and encourage) red flags in new people we meet.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join the BGH's Members Club: blackgirlsheal.org/membersThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

What does it look like to be available to others after you've been working on your love avoidance symptoms.

In this episode, I share 3 tips for those who are starting this journey building relationships in a different way.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join the BGH's Members Club: blackgirlsheal.org/membersThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In today's episode, we review going from Love Avoidant to Love Available using the Healed and Loved Woman framework model.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join the BGH's Members Club: blackgirlsheal.org/membersThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of Black Girls Heal, we revisit the topic of 'No Contact' and the seven-day 'Don't Text Them: Sit on Your Effing Hands Challenge.' This discussion is aimed at those caught in addictive or trauma-bonded relationships, whether romantic, familial, or friendships. 

We discuss topics like recognizing toxic relationships, the importance of breaking the cycle for self-healing, and the benefits of having a support system during this process. 

We also touch on the new 90-Day No Contact Support Group, offering 90-day support for those serious about cutting trauma bonds. Tune in to learn why you deserve fulfilling relationships and how to reclaim your power and joy.

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join the BGH's Members Club: blackgirlsheal.org/membersThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Watch our free How to Stop Dating the Wrong People & Fix Your Internal Magnet masterclass: Click here register

Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance?

Click here to join our The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled

 

CONNECT WITH US ELSEWHERE

Website: Blackgirlsheal.org

Instagram: @BlackGirlsHeal

TikTok: @blackgirlsheal

Facebook: Black Girls Heal

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Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In today's episode I talk about the impact of childhood emotional neglect and how it leads to the behaviours of love addiction

Whether you are connected to love addition, love avoidance or low self esteem, if you are wondering why you continue in the same type of self doubts or keep being attracted to certain types of people, my hope is that this episode gives you the validation that you didn't even know you needed and supports you with the right steps you can start taking today

MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE

BOOK: Running on Empty - Dr Jonice Webb

Therecoveryschool.com

Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance?

Click here to join our The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled

 

CONNECT WITH US ELSEWHERE

Website: Blackgirlsheal.org

Instagram: @BlackGirlsHeal

TikTok: @blackgirlsheal

Facebook: Black Girls Heal

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Which love addict archetype do you identify with and how do you begin to heal from it?

In this week’s episode of Black Girls Heal, I’m breaking down the four main archetypes of love addiction and why each of these patterns comes with its own unique set of challenges AND beautiful qualities. Whether you're constantly chasing “the one,” afraid to be alone, losing yourself in relationships, or living in a fantasy that never quite matches reality, you’ll likely see yourself in one (or more) of these types.

In this episode, we cover…

01:15 Understanding the roots of love addiction07:08 Archetype #115:53 Archetype #225:10 Archetype #330:51 Archetype #434:19 The path to becoming love-balanced40:15 How to go deeper with resources and next steps

Resources mentioned in the episode:

4 Ways to Pick Better Partners as Love Addicts: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/masterclassThe 4 Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapHow to Pick Partners for Love Addicts book: blackgirlsheal.org/booksReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

How do you hold yourself through grief when it feels too heavy to carry?

In this heartfelt episode of Black Girls Heal, I’m sharing my personal reflections and tools for navigating the emotional waves of grief, especially aftera sudden or unexpected loss. Whether it's the loss of a family member, a friend, a beloved pet, or a mentor, grief can shake us to our core. And yet, in the midst of all the confusion, numbness, and pain, we’re still expected to show up for life. This episode is an invitation to slow down and feel what needs to be felt without judgment.

In this episode, we cover…

01:42 My personal experiences with sudden loss04:19 Why validating your emotions is crucial for healing14:28 How to navigate the “what ifs” and regrets27:09 Practical tools to process grief

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join the BGH Members Club: https://black-girls-heal.circle.so/checkout/bgh-members-clubReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Is your fear of intimacy keeping you from the love you want?

In this episode of Black Girls Heal, we’re diving deep into love avoidance—what it is, how it shows up, and the mistakes that keep us from building healthy, connected relationships. If you find yourself pulling away when things get too good, struggling to be vulnerable, or avoiding dating altogether, you’re not alone. These patterns often come from past trauma and a desire to protect ourselves, but they can also block the very intimacy we’re craving.

Whether you’re just starting to explore this part of your healing or you’ve been working on it for a while, this episode offers real talk and real tools to support your journey.

In this episode, we cover…

02:43 The most common mistakes love avoidants make in relationships05:35 How trauma creates defense mechanisms that block intimacy14:59 Mistake #1: Getting spooked when things are going well23:20 Mistake #2: Struggling to be emotionally vulnerable30:07 Mistake #3: Avoiding dating altogether36:25 Final reflections and steps to move forward

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Episode 284: 3 Dating Mistakes to Avoid As A Love Addict: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/podcast/284-dating-mistakesHow to Pick Partners for Love Addicts book: blackgirlsheal.org/booksReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

Are you falling in love with potential instead of reality?

In this episode of Black Girls Heal, I’m diving into three critical mistakes love addicts make when dating—mistakes that can keep you stuck in unhealthy cycles. Whether you're unknowingly romanticizing red flags, struggling to walk away from emotionally unavailable partners, or making dating your full-time job, this episode will help you break free from these patterns.

In this episode, we cover…

03:00 - Why falling in love with potential keeps you stuck10:45 - The importance of trusting your instincts when red flags appear17:30 - How making dating your hobby can lead to emotional burnout24:15 - Breaking the cycle of fantasy-driven relationships30:40 - Practical steps to build a fulfilling life outside of dating

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Download the Free Love Addiction & Avoidance Roadmap: blackgirlsheal.org/roadmapReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, I'm diving deep into how healing circles can transform your journey through love addiction recovery. After years of coaching women through attachment struggles, I've seen firsthand how creating the right community can accelerate healing in ways individual work simply can't.

We explore exactly how to build your own healing circle—from finding the right participants to establishing crucial ground rules that create safety for vulnerability. I share practical tips for structuring your meetings, developing a curriculum that promotes real growth, and navigating the inevitable conflicts that arise when people are doing deep healing work together.

In this episode, we cover…

02:35 - The sisterhood effect on healing03:56 - How to create your own healing circle09:16 - Setting your healing circle up for success17:16 - Ground rules for safety29:13 - Ways to structure your healing circle34:41 - How to ask and provide for feedback 45:42 - How to find your circle sisters

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Listen to Episode 282: How to Heal in Community (7 Tips to Make Sisterhood Work): blackgirlsheal.org/podcast/282-heal-communityThe Black Girls Healing Circle Workbook: https://amzn.to/3Dx3uDjListen to Episode 56: Starting A Healing Circle: blackgirlsheal.org/podcast/episode-55-starting-a-healing-circleThe Healed and Loved Woman Retreat: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/retreatHow to Pick Partners for Love Addicts book: blackgirlsheal.org/booksReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, I'm diving deep into something that's essential for our healing journey but often overlooked—the power of sisterhood and community. As someone who's experienced both the isolation of healing alone and the transformative power of healing in community, I'm sharing seven practical tips to help you build and nurture meaningful friendships that support your growth.

In this episode, we cover…

01:00 The importance of community in healing04:45 Where to find friends15:41 Why you should invest in friendships18:24 Challenges in building friendships26:29 Finding friends with a good track record32:20 How to handle rejection and ghosting35:37 Accepting different levels of friendship42:42 Prioritizing self-care and avoidance to grow your friendships

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Listen to Episode 56: Starting A Healing Circle: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/podcast/episode-55-starting-a-healing-circleThe Black Girls Healing Circle Workbook: https://amzn.to/3Dx3uDjListen to Episode 108: How to Make Adult Female Friendships with Danielle Bayard Jackson: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/podcast/episode-108-how-to-make-adult-female-friendships-with-danielle-bayard-jacksonThe Healed and Loved Woman Retreat: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/retreatJoin our email list: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/mailing-listHow to Pick Partners for Love Addicts book: blackgirlsheal.org/booksReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, we're having an honest conversation about something that hits deep—why we stay in relationships even when we're completely exhausted. From social media discussions to real-life experiences, we're seeing how women often find themselves caught in cycles of emotional labor and self-improvement, all while trying to make a relationship work that's draining their energy.

Through my years of coaching women, I've identified the key stages we go through in these relationships: from the initial comfort and commitment, through the stress and burnout, to the moments of clarity that finally lead to change.

In this episode, we cover…

09:14 Stages of relationship commitment13:35 Stress and burnout in relationships25:49 Emotional and physical impact of relationships36:50 Resignation vs. true self-love45:50 Deep self-forgiveness and trauma work

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Listen to Episode 174: Healing our Womb and Pelvic Floor with Dr. Alicia Jeffrey-Thomas: https://www.blackgirlsheal.org/podcast/174-healing-our-womb-pelvic-floor-with-dr-alicia-jeffrey-thomasHow to Pick Partners for Love Addicts book: blackgirlsheal.org/booksReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, we're diving deep into something that can shake your whole world—when someone you're dating suddenly goes quiet or starts feeding you breadcrumbs of attention. Whether they're ghosting you completely or keeping you hanging with "I'm just busy" texts, we're getting real about what this behavior actually means.

Through my years of coaching women through love addiction recovery, I've seen how these disappearing acts can leave us questioning our worth and replaying every moment trying to figure out what we did wrong. Today, I'm breaking down the manipulation tactics some people use to keep you attached, and more importantly, how to recognize them before they drain your energy.

In this episode, we cover…

03:31 Common manipulation tactics14:24 How to break the self-blame cycle26:02 Doing the inner work31:33 How to communicate your needs39:42 The truth about disappearing acts43:18 Coping with no contact

Resources mentioned in the episode:

How to Pick Partner Checklist: blackgirlsheal.thrivecart.com/how-to-pick-partners-checklist/Listen to Episode 253: The 4 Steps of No Contact: blackgirlsheal.org/podcast/steps-no-contactListen to Episode 279: 4 Steps to Help Yourself Heal and Relationships to Flourish: blackgirlsheal.org/podcast/279-4-steps-heal-yourself-relationships-flourish How to Pick Partners for Love Addicts book: blackgirlsheal.org/booksReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled: blackgirlsheal.org/love-addiction-recoveryCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements: blackgirlsheal.org/retired

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, I'm breaking down the complete framework I use with my coaching clients to transform their relationship patterns — the Bloom Method. After years of helping women heal from love addiction, love avoidance, and love deprivation, I've developed this powerful approach that guides you from identifying toxic roots to cultivating lasting change.

Through my work at the Love Addiction Recovery School, I've seen how this method helps women restore their relationship with themselves and create deeper, more authentic connections with others. Think of it like tending a garden: we start by uprooting what no longer serves you, cultivate fresh soil for new growth, harvest the fruits of your work, and learn how to maintain your flourishing garden.

In this episode, we cover…

00:57 Overview of the Love Addiction Recovery School03:24 The Bloom Method Explained06:23 Step 1: Uprooting the Weeds16:54 Step 2: Cultivating the Ground25:14 Step 3: Harvesting the Fruits29:46 Step 4: Tending and Maintaining

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Listen toEpisode 278: The First Three Steps to Heal Love AddictionReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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In this episode of the Black Girls Heal  podcast, we dive deep into the topic of love addiction and explore the steps to break free from its cycles. Learn about the free downloadable resource “The Five Step Roadmap to Heal Love Addiction” and discover how to identify and detox from addictive relationships. We also discuss the importance of addressing unresolved childhood wounds and building a supportive network for effective healing. Whether you are dealing with love addiction, love avoidance, or love deprivation, this episode provides invaluable insights and tools to help you achieve a love-balanced life.

In this episode, we cover…

03:53 What is Love Addiction?06:51 Steps to heal Love Addiction15:42 Detoxing from addictive relationships30:24 Why you need to clear toxic roots

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Stop your love addiction patterns in 5 steps using theHeal Love Addiction RoadmapCheck out theHow to Pick Partners for Love Addicts bookReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? JoinThe Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast?Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website:Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram:@BlackGirlsHealTikTok:@blackgirlshealFacebook:Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, we're diving into something that many of us struggle with—protecting our individuality when new love enters the picture. You know that excitement when someone new comes into your life and suddenly you want to share every moment with them? Today, we're talking about why that impulse, though natural, needs some healthy boundaries.

Through my years of coaching women through love addiction recovery, I've discovered three powerful strategies that can help you maintain your identity while building meaningful connections. These aren't just tips —they're practical tools that can transform how you approach new relationships and protect your emotional wellbeing.

In this episode, we cover…

03:46 The importance of slowing down05:17 Tip 1: Share your joy with friends first14:52 Tip 2: Set scheduled times and dates19:46 Tip 3: Hold off on sexual intimacy

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? JoinThe Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast?Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website:Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram:@BlackGirlsHealTikTok:@blackgirlshealFacebook:Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, I'm diving deep into how I personally use astrology as a powerful tool for healing and understanding relationships. As someone who was once skeptical and came from a Christian ministry background, I share how astrology has evolved from being something I dismissed to becoming an invaluable resource in my personal growth and coaching practice.

Through breaking down the basics of natal charts, planetary placements, and houses, I explain how astrology is far more complex and personalized than just your sun sign. We explore why your exact birth time and location matter, and how different placements in your chart can affect everything from how you communicate to how you experience love.

In this episode, we cover…

02:00 - Breaking down astrological basics 14:00 - Understanding houses & planetary placements 31:00 - The importance of birth time & location 42:00 - Breaking down the four key placements 54:00 - Venus & love relationships 01:07:00 - Practical applications in daily life

Resources mentioned in the episode:

CafeAstrology.comAstrology for the Soul by Jan SpillerReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, we're diving into a game-changing tool that's about to transform how you evaluate potential relationships - the Availability Scale. Drawing from my new book 'How to Pick Partners for Love Addicts,' we're breaking down the seven levels of availability that determine whether someone is truly ready and able to show up in a relationship.

We're getting practical about how to identify where potential partners fall on the scale, from those who are fully available for deep, meaningful connections (what I call BLP - Best Friend, Lover, Partner availability) to those who present critical dangers to your emotional wellbeing.

In this episode, we cover…

04:26 The Seven Levels of Availability08:45 Signs of Availability and Unavailability13:13 Best Friend, Lover, Partner Availability29:39 Good Friend Level Availability34:51 Stranger Danger and Other Dangerous Levels

Resources mentioned in the episode:

OrderHow to Pick Partners for Love Addictsbook.Join the Dating to Win for Love Addicts program.Check out the No Contact Support Kit.Watch the FREE Masterclass: 4 Ways to Pick Better Partners as Love AddictsReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, we're kicking off 2025 with a powerful conversation about building stronger, healthier relationships - and yes, we're having this talk even through a 103-degree fever because that's how important this message is!

Whether you're dealing with love addiction, love avoidance, or just want to level up your relationships this year, we're diving into three game-changing strategies that you can start implementing right now. No more waiting for the "perfect time" or the "right moment" - your journey to better relationships starts today.

In this episode, we cover…

01:29 Three ways to improve your relationships03:20 How to assess availability in relationships06:03 Stop waiting for the perfect time14:26 Why you should forgive yourself and allow space for growth22:49 Be open to changing your mind26:35 News about upcoming Black Girls Heal events

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Get your own copy of the How to Pick Partners for Love Addicts book.Join The Healed and Loved Woman RetreatJoin the How to Make it Work workshopReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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Fear of abandonment can create a lot of insecurity and conflict in a relationship. In this episode, we break down 3 signs to look out for to add to your recovery plan for healing.

Get the New Book here on Amazon

Register for the How to Make it Work Between Love Avoidants and Love Addicts Workshop here

Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance?

Click here to join our The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled

 

Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast?

Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements

 

CONNECT WITH US ELSEWHERE

Website: Blackgirlsheal.org

Instagram: @BlackGirlsHeal

TikTok: @blackgirlsheal

Facebook: Black Girls Heal

Website: Blackgirlsheal.org

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In this episode, I will go over 3 green flags of availability for healthy partners for love addicts pulling from my new book, How to Pick Partners for Love Addicts.

Get the New Book here on Amazon

Register for the How to Make it Work Between Love Avoidants and Love Addicts Workshop here

Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance?

Click here to join our The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled

 

Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast?

Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements

 

CONNECT WITH US ELSEWHERE

Website: Blackgirlsheal.org

Instagram: @BlackGirlsHeal

TikTok: @blackgirlsheal

Facebook: Black Girls Heal

Website: Blackgirlsheal.org

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On top of the normal holiday overwhelm, it seems like many of us are dealing with fatigue that we just can't catch a break. In today's episode, I give 3 tips to help support where you are.

Enroll in the 60 Day Love Avoidant Rehab

 

Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance?

Click here to join our The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled

 

Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast?

Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements

 

CONNECT WITH US ELSEWHERE

Website: Blackgirlsheal.org

Instagram: @BlackGirlsHeal

TikTok: @blackgirlsheal

Facebook: Black Girls Heal

Website: Blackgirlsheal.org

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Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, we're diving into a topic that often brings up complex emotions - recognizing when friendships might be temporary. You know those relationships that feel so intense and meaningful in the moment, but somehow don't stand the test of time? Let's talk about why that happens and why it might actually be perfectly okay.

Through sharing personal stories and insights from my upcoming book 'How to Pick Partners for Love Addicts', we're exploring four key ways to understand the natural ebb and flow of friendships. Whether it's bonding over shared interests, connecting through shared trauma, building relationships in forced environments like work or school, or finding yourself in life transitions - each type of friendship serves its own beautiful purpose.

This isn't about labeling friendships as "less than" because they might be temporary. Instead, we're reframing how we view these connections, understanding that not every friend is meant to be in our lives forever, and that's perfectly okay. From navigating workplace friendships to understanding how religious communities impact our connections, we're getting real about what makes relationships stick or shift.

In this episode, we cover…

03:14 Why temporary friendship exists04:11 Four signs of temporary friendships18:16 The complexity of building friendships34:26 How to navigate transitional friendships36:57 The importance of clear communication in friendships44:59 Why you should still embrace temporary friendships46:17 Upcoming book releases 

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Grab copies of my books,How to Pick Partners for Love Addicts and No Contact Support BookListen to Episode 263: Checking the Facts When You're in ConflictListen to Episode 253: The 4 Steps of No ContactReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, we're diving into something all of us face but nobody really wants to talk about - those seasons when it feels like you're in conflict with EVERYONE. You know those times? When it seems like every conversation is tense, every interaction is challenging, and you're starting to wonder if maybe you're the problem?

First, take a deep breath. Because what if I told you these seasons of conflict aren't here to break you - they're here to build you? What if every misunderstanding, every tough conversation, every moment that makes you want to scream into your pillow is actually an invitation to grow?

We're getting real about how to take care of yourself when it feels like you're swimming in difficult energy. From dealing with current conflicts to processing unresolved issues from your past, I'm sharing four practical strategies that have helped not just my clients, but myself too, in navigating these stormy seasons.

In this episode, we cover…

01:00 Understanding why seasons of conflict happen02:52 Opportunities for growth during seasons of conflict08:14 How to deal with misunderstandings19:57 Why you should be teachable25:31 Reflecting on past conflicts

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, we're taking a moment to celebrate YOU. Yes, you! We're shifting away from our usual conversations about red flags and relationship challenges to focus on something equally important - acknowledging just how far you've come in your healing journey.

You know those moments when you catch a red flag early? When you trust your gut instead of second-guessing yourself? When you look in the mirror and actually like who you see? Those aren't small wins - they're evidence of your incredible growth, and it's time we celebrate them!

Through personal stories and real-life examples, we're diving into the beautiful transformation that happens when we start recognizing our own progress. From being able to spot those red flags quicker (instead of six months down the line!), to actually trusting ourselves more than other people's opinions, to developing that genuine self-love that isn't dependent on anyone else's validation - these are all victories worth celebrating.

This conversation isn't just about patting ourselves on the back - it's about acknowledging that every step forward in our healing journey matters. Whether you're just starting out or you're well along your path, there's something powerful about stopping to recognize how far you've come.

In this episode, we cover…

02:47 Why you should recognize your growth03:31 Embracing your wisdom05:13 How to navigate life's challenges06:30 Understanding self-knowledge08:26 How to build self-love09:42 Having faith beyond relationships19:22 The power of self-liking

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, we're getting real about something that hits deep - what do you do when someone just stops showing up for you emotionally? You know that feeling when their energy shifts, the care fades, and you're left wondering what happened?

After seeing so many TikTok conversations about love avoidance and no contact, I knew it was time to dive into this topic heart-first. Because let's be honest - whether it's a romantic partner, a friend, or even family, that emotional withdrawal hits different when it comes from someone you truly care about.

This isn't just another "move on" conversation. We're getting into the nitty-gritty of how to hold onto your worth when someone's actions (or lack thereof) have you questioning everything. I'm sharing three powerful strategies that have helped not just my clients, but myself too, in navigating these tough waters.

In this episode, we cover…

04:31 When you grieve the fantasy of relationships06:35 Your coping toolkit08:52 Coping Strategy 115:57 Coping Strategy 221:46 Coping Strategy 335:41 The No-Contact Strategy

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Listen toEpisode 266: 7 Benefits of Taking it Slow in a RelationshipListen toEpisode 137: 4 Ways to Exit Love DeprivationGet your90-Day No-Contact KitReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, we dive into the seven benefits of taking it slow in a relationship — the power of a 'slow burn.' 

I discuss the reasons behind why rushing into relationships can be problematic, especially for love addicts, and share practical tips on how to pace relationships effectively. 

I also explore how going slow helps in truly understanding your partner, avoiding unhealthy attachments, and building a stronger foundation for your love story. 

This episode is perfect for hopeless romantics who want to avoid 'struggle love' and genuinely find a fulfilling relationship.

In this episode, we cover…

00:17 Understanding love addiction and avoidance2:55 Seven benefits of going slow in relationships28:36 The impact of sex and affection34:40 Self-love and building a fulfilling life

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled. Get 25% off enrollment through November 1st using the code NEWSTUDENT.Enroll in Dating 101 for Love Addicts if you are ready to choose the RIGHT ones to love without losing yourself.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

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In this episode, I review 3 hidden ways we may unknowingly ignore (and encourage) red flags in new people we meet.

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In this episode, I talk about why I'm quitting and what's coming next for Black Girls Heal!

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Register for the BGH Lover Girl's Weekend Workshop on Saturday,, February 8, 2025 at blackgirlsheal.org/eventsReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled. Get 25% off enrollment through November 1st using the code NEWSTUDENTBook a 1:1 private coaching session with Shena until November 2024.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of Black Girls Heal, we explore the importance of checking the facts when feeling threatened, especially for those healing from trauma. 

We discuss how trauma can heighten our threat response, making it difficult to discern real threats from perceived ones. The episode delves into the skill of 'checking the facts,' a concept derived from dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), outlining practical steps to take for regulating emotions and improving conflict resolution. 

My personal stories and examples highlight the nuances of threat perception, emotional regulation, and the impact of trauma on relationships. 

We also tackle the challenge of making amends if you realize you've misunderstood a situation or person. 

Tune in for essential tips on fostering better personal relationships and self-awareness.

In this episode, we cover…

01:06 Understanding trauma and threat response02:55 The skill of “Checking the Facts”04:20 Dialectical Behavior Therapy Explained07:03 Personal reflections on trauma responses18:42 Steps to check the facts30:17 Why you should challenge your assumptions44:36 How to make amends with healthy and available people

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Book a 1:1 private coaching session with Shena until November 2024.Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of Black Girls Heal, we dive into the poignant topic of rejection, inspired by heartfelt conversations from my recent cruise trip. Focusing on love addiction, I discuss the fear of abandonment and the insecurities it breeds. 

Together, we explore how to cope with rejection, understand its impact, and reclaim our power. You'll learn about the importance of not internalizing rejection, viewing it as a reflection of the other person's issues, and embracing your true self. 

Join me as we unravel the layers of rejection and discover ways to heal and grow.

In this episode, we cover…

02:29 How to cope with rejection05:23 Examples of rejection07:23 Dealing with rejection14:39 Why you should embrace your true self22:01 Avoiding relationship pitfalls

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of Black Girls Heal, we dive into a major milestone — our very first video podcast episode! After years of audio-only recordings, I am showing up in video to connect with you more intimately. 

I start with a heartfelt check-in, sharing my personal experiences of transitions and the collective 'hell' many of us have gone through recently in various aspects of our lives. 

Today's episode is all about understanding the importance of pacing in dating for love addicts, discussing how unresolved traumas, father wounds, and touch starvation can lead us to rush into relationships. Learn practical steps on how to pace yourself, maintain your identity, and find joy in your current life while still holding space for the love you desire. 

Plus, get updates on the new format of the Recovery School and upcoming changes in my services. This episode is packed with insights and actionable advice to help you on your journey to healing and self-love.

In this episode, we cover…

04:09 Navigating personal transitions06:05 Why you should embrace the unknown13:22 Healthy Love vs. Love Addiction19:14 The importance of pacing in relationships30:06 Leveling up in healing32:22 How unresolved father wounds affect pacing in relationships39:09 What is touch starvation?47:30 How to ground in your own life54:20 Upcoming changes and announcements to Black Girls Heal

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Book a 1:1 private coaching session with Shena until November 2024.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of Black Girls Heal, I delve into the intricacies of implementing a no-contact process while co-parenting. This much-requested topic focuses on maintaining emotional neutrality and setting firm boundaries when you have to communicate with a co-parent for the sake of your children.

I’ll share practical steps and tips designed to help you stay centered and avoid the emotional triggers that led you to this place. 

Disclaimer: This advice is not suitable for relationships involving physical domestic violence; please seek appropriate support if that is your situation.

In this episode, we cover…

01:41 Challenges of co-parenting during no-contact03:23 An important disclaimer05:50 Importance of emotional neutrality11:48 Seeing your co-parent as a co-worker24:13 Using parenting apps for communication27:00 How to set boundaries to avoid emotional traps31:40 How to deal with toxic relationships39:28 Communicating with children during no contact

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Get the support of our 90-Day No Contact Support Kit to help you break your trauma bonded relationships, build a full life outside of the connection, heal related anxieties, and make space for healthy love.Listen to Episode 253: The 4 Steps of No ContactReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of Black Girls Heal, we're diving into the world of love avoidance and how to navigate new relationships when you're healing from it. We'll talk about understanding intimacy disorders, recovering from those avoidant patterns, and how to communicate your needs in a healthy way.

Whether you're just starting in your recovery, you're in a new relationship, or even in a long-term one, this episode is packed with tips to help you stay balanced and build stronger connections.

In this episode, we cover…

01:33 Understanding Love Avoidance02:30 The different archetypes of intimacy disorders 03:22 How to navigate love addiction and avoidance05:26 Practical tips for love avoidants10:12 Ways to share your life as a recovering love avoidant19:00 How to initiate compliments and kindness25:09 Why you should embrace vulnerability

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Listen to Episode 258: What to Do When You Like Someone as a Love AddictReady to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of Black Girls Heal, we dive into the intricacies of managing romantic relationships for those in recovery from love addiction. 

We discuss the importance of staying in touch with your body, practicing self-affirmation, and maintaining your own life and identity. These actionable tips are geared to help you stay balanced while developing healthy, secure connections. Whether you're in a new relationship or already partnered, these strategies will guide you towards emotional stability and personal growth.

In this episode, we cover…

01:08 Understanding love addiction02:22 Symptoms of love addiction04:07 Keys to staying balanced in relationships13:38 The importance of self-affirmation21:14 Why you should maintain your own life

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

You know that feeling when things don't go as planned and you're left feeling disappointed? Yeah, we've all been there. This week on the Black Girls Heal podcast, we're diving deep into how to manage unrealistic expectations and fantasies in your relationships so you can avoid those heartbreaks.

We're going to break down how to set realistic standards, the difference between your hopes and someone else's reality, and why putting people on pedestals is a one-way ticket to heartbreak. 

Tune in to learn how to keep your heart happy and your expectations in check.

In this episode, we cover…

03:32 Understanding why you have unrealistic expectations04:02 The impact of high expectations in relationships04:35 How to balance standards and emotional safety05:43 Why you should see people for who they are10:16 How to avoid the pedestal trap15:59 Breaking the cycle of unrealistic expectations

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of the Black Girls Heal, we’re going to be talking about something really deep today: how what happened to us as kids can mess with our love lives BIG TIME. We're diving into childhood emotional neglect and how it can lead to those addictive relationships we sometimes find ourselves in.

It's wild how many of us deal with the fallout from not feeling seen or heard as kids. It's like this sneaky little pattern that shows up in our adult lives, making us chase love in all the wrong places. We'll break down what emotional neglect actually looks like, how it sticks with us, and how it sparks addictive relationships.

Don't worry! This episode isn't just about the problem. We're gonna talk about healing too. It's all about understanding where this stuff comes from so we can start breaking those unhealthy patterns and building the love we deserve.

In this episode, we cover…

00:17 What is childhood emotional neglect?01:47 The impact of childhood emotional neglect on relationships03:08 What is love addiction?03:32 Signs of emotional neglect in your life06:51 How to break the cycle of emotional neglect09:03 The connection between neglect and love addiction12:03 Steps to overcome love addiction24:00 Why you should heal with a community

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Sign up for the Healed and Loved Woman Retreat waitlist.Running On Empty by Jonice WebbCan’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of Black Girls Heal, I dive deep into the lessons I've learned over my 10 years of recovery from love addiction. This journey has been incredibly personal and transformative. Many of you have watched and supported me through it all—clients, friends, and those who know me through this podcast. I reflect on the challenges, the growth, and the relationships that have shaped me, culminating in a discussion inspired by a poignant poem that has guided me. 

Join me as I share my story, my insights as a therapist, and the lessons that have helped me build a stronger, healthier relationship with myself. Whether you're just starting your journey or have been here for a while, I hope my experiences resonate with you and offer inspiration for your own path to self-acceptance and self-love.

In this episode, we cover…

00:57 My journey of love addiction recovery02:09 The poem that changed everything03:37 My personal background and struggles with love addiction06:56 Lessons from my love addiction recovery journey13:08 The turning point in my love addiction recovery journey15:29 How I embraced self-love and independence39:03 Final reflections and takeaways

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join our 90-Day No Contact Support Group to help you break your trauma bonded relationships, build a full life outside of the connection, heal related anxieties, and make space for healthy love.Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of Black Girls Heal, we dive deep into financial codependency—a pattern where you feel obligated to support others financially, even to your own detriment. We explore its roots, how it manifests in various relationships, and the emotional toll it takes. 

You'll learn about practical steps to break free from this cycle, including a 90-day no-contact financial challenge to help reset your finances and reclaim your well-being. We also provide resources to support your journey, including workshops on money trauma and no-contact groups. 

Join us as we focus on reclaiming control, setting healthy boundaries, and prioritizing self-care in your financial life.

In this episode, we cover…

02:47 What does financial codependency mean?03:47 How to recognize financial codependency in relationships08:21 How to start breaking the cycle of financial codependency25:52 How to implement no-contact with financial codependency32:34 Practical steps for financial independence43:16 Resources to support your no-contact journey

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join our 90-Day No Contact Support Group to help you break your trauma bonded relationships, build a full life outside of the connection, heal related anxieties, and make space for healthy love.Start healing the wounds that sabotage financial goals, increase fear and anxiety around money, and interrupt the ability to enjoy financial abundance and prosperity through the Money Rehab workshop.Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of the Black Girls Heal podcast, I talk about the power of "no contact" as a tool to finally break free from toxic relationships.

You know how it goes – you finally decide to walk away, but somehow, you end up back in contact with that person who just brings you down. It's frustrating, right? Well, here's the thing: most setbacks in our healing journeys happen because we keep connections with folks who are bad for us.

In the episode, I'll walk you through four key steps to make no-contact work. We'll talk about the withdrawal symptoms you might experience, both physical and emotional (because yes, this can be a rollercoaster!). I'll also share tips on setting intentions for your no-contact period and how to cut off those lingering fantasies that hold you back.

In this episode, we cover…

00:58 What is No-Contact?02:45 Why you should take a 90-day break03:10 Four steps to no-contact03:47 Withdrawal symptoms you might experience16:20 What it looks like to cut off all contact21:17 How to cut off lingering fantasies29:26 Support resources to start your no-contact journey

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join our 90-Day No Contact Support Group to help you break your trauma bonded relationships, build a full life outside of the connection, heal related anxieties, and make space for healthy love.Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy

In this episode of Black Girls Heal, we revisit the topic of 'No Contact' and the seven-day 'Don't Text Them: Sit on Your Effing Hands Challenge.' This discussion is aimed at those caught in addictive or trauma-bonded relationships, whether romantic, familial, or friendships. 

We discuss topics like recognizing toxic relationships, the importance of breaking the cycle for self-healing, and the benefits of having a support system during this process. 

We also touch on the new 90-Day No Contact Support Group, offering 90-day support for those serious about cutting trauma bonds. Tune in to learn why you deserve fulfilling relationships and how to reclaim your power and joy.

In this episode, we cover…

01:05 The importance of no contact05:04 The Sit on Your Hands Challenge05:28 Who this episode is for and not for16:34 How to recognize avoidant behavior21:58 How to start making decisions from a place of wholeness23:13 Implementing the Sit on Your Hands Challenge24:06 Handling communication during the challenge25:08 Ways to focus on yourself and other relationships28:58 How to respond to their messages32:42 Ways to engage in self-care and hobbies

Resources mentioned in the episode:

Join our 90 Day No Contact Support Group to help you break your trauma bonded relationships, build a full life outside of the connection, heal related anxieties, and make space for healthy love.Ready to heal your Love Addiction & Love Avoidance? Join The Recovery School, my signature coaching program to help you become love balanced, love available, and fulfilled.Can’t find a program, freebie, or event mentioned in the podcast? Click here to find the upgraded versions of previously announced programs and their replacements.

Connect with us:

Website: Blackgirlsheal.orgInstagram: @BlackGirlsHealTikTok: @blackgirlshealFacebook: Black Girls Heal

Thanks for listening, and if you like what you've heard, feel free to share this episode with your friends! There are so many amazing women waiting to discover the Black Girls Heal podcast, and I'd love you to help me spread the word. Don’t forget to come back next week for the new episode.

Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands

Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy