The Goalmouth: Bite-size soccer news

Ryan Bailey runs you through the very latest soccer news, including Neymar's crazy cost, Kyle Walker's intriguing comments and a new eSports youth academy. For more on today's stories, subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V.

The US Men's National Team advances past El Salvador in the Gold Cup, albeit with several bite marks, Jozy Altidore's girlfriend is not pleased, Chelsea eventually get their second choice man, that Neymar-to-PSG rumor is somehow gaining momentum, and history is made in Major League Soccer.

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Christian Pulisic puts on a clinic, your guide to watching soccer on TV today, Antonio Conte renews with Chelsea, the 2017 MLS All Star roster's two biggest snubs (in my opinion), and one of the best postgame interviews I've ever seen by a manager.

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A new kind of clearance sale at Arsenal, PSG are considering spending an absolutely insane amount of money for one player (even by their standards), Joe Hart gets loaned, Pepe Reina could be bought, Claudio Bravo may be left out in the cold, Kylian Mbappe might be on a plane, and Manchester United had a strange time in Utah.

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Reinforcements fly in the for the Gold Cup quarterfinals! The Women's Euros begin! Milan are buying all the players! Zlatan turns down the Galaxy! And Jose Mourinho's mission impossible!

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Ryan Bailey delivers today's bite-sized morsels of soccer news, which includes Neymar's new tattoo, Gold Cup action and fancy seats in Bolton. For more on today's stories, subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

The US Men's National Team continues to make everyone nervous, Chuck Blazer passes away, Tiemoue Bakayoko is joining Chelsea for the 13th time this transfer window, Riyad Mahrez might finally be on the move, and David Villa is the best player in Major League soccer.

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Florent Malouda and French Guiana find yet another way to make a mockery of CONCACAF, US Open Cupdate, Karim Benzema wins a victory in his blackmail case, even I can juggle more times than Real Madrid's new signing, more transfer news, Leicester City's owners in trouble with the Thai government, and a club announces for the first time that it will be paying its male and female players equally. For more on today's stories, subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V.

Daryl Grove went all in on the transfer gossip for today's Goalmouth. He regrets nothing.

The U.S. starts the Gold Cup with a draw, Rooney and Lukaku trade places, Chelsea land Rudiger, and positive news after a scary moment for an Ajax player.

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Lukaku transfer update! The world's most dedicated fan! Henrikh Mkhitaryan tries the Wayne Rooney summer diet plan! The North American 2026 World Cup bid is on! And the world's first braille kit! For more on today's stories, subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

Manchester United might be parting ways with Wayne Rooney, may still be interested in Alvaro Morata, and may possibly have signed Romelu Lukaku, a cataclysmic combo could soon be reigning supreme in Turkey, Americans on the move, and the Kenny Saief Hype Train will be idling at the station for the entirety of The Gold Cup.

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American sons of international superstars, Messi's new contract will make him even richer but not as rich as Steph Curry, a brief transfer news round-up, and two shocking losses

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Germany win the Confederations Cup! Dom Dwyer flips for the red, white, and blue! John Terry has a new club! Leo Messi gets married! And Sepp Blatter just can't stay away!

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Real Madrid's transfer freeze! Ronaldo's bundles of joy! Germany's Confederations Cup triumph! Bayern Munich's bad omen! And Paolo Maldini has retired… again! For more on today's stories, subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

The US Open cup keeps hope alive, Chile do the same in the Confederations Cup, LAFC's theoretical roster continues to theoretically expand, the transfer market keeps on thriving, surprisingly favorable contracts in Russia, and witch doctors in the Portuguese Liga.

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The Garcia Report, prosecutions (finally) in the Hillsborough Disaster, Toronto FC is the champion of Canada, streaming soccer news for the Premier League and Champions League, and Confederations Cup and UEFA under-21 updates

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Daryl Grove with today's soccer news and patriotic tea-making tips:

FIFA corruption revealed, almost! An Englishman sneaks onto the US Gold Cup roster. England U21s face Germany in the Euro U 21 semis and will almost definitely not lose on penalties. Plus: Man Utd in for Matic and Liverpool get a quote on Keita.

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The Confederations Cup semifinals are set! Clint Dempsey strikes again! Mario Balotelli gets a Nice new deal! San Jose fire a coach, Crystal Palace hire one! And, Paul Pogba does the most Paul Pogba thing possible!

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Christian Pulisic is up for an award! Oscar got a huge ban! The Confederations Cup remains vaguely interesting! Liverpool performed the worst piece of transfer business in history! And Sergio Ramos is really really bad at tax evasion. For more on today's stories, subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

Video Assistant Referees are the new Heath Ledger, Cristiano Ronaldo does Cristiano Ronaldo things, Zlatan lets his clothes do the talking, a couple of Americans might be getting new European clubs, and we take a moment to remember Tony DiCicco.

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Even more legal trouble for Real Madrid stars, Manchester United cleared of wrongdoing in the Pogba scandal, two Red Bull teams will be allowed to play in the Champions League, Boca Juniors wins the league, and Oscar causes a bench-clearing brawl

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Daryl Grove with today's soccer news and birthday wishes. On today's episode: Germany shows us the future; VAR controversy, again; new rules, coming soon to a soccer field near you; Chucky Lozano on the move; and tax problems for C-Ron and The Special One.

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The Confederations Cup begins! Are Ronaldo and Dani Alves going to the same city? It's raining fake money at the U-21 European Championship! Paolo Maldini is a tennis player now! And, Crotone's manager completes a really long bike ride!

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Buckle up, cause we've got a drama-filled episode for you today! Cristiano doesn't like Spain anymore, Milan's teenage sensation stabbed the club in the back and the fans in the heart ALLLLLL at once, Marco Verratti continues the will he/won't he dance with Barcelona, Jurgen Klinsmann gets paid, Antonio Conte stays angry, Andres Guardado might be on the move, and so might Freddy Adu.

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Daryl Grove with today's soccer news! Get more goodness in the Goalmouth daily email: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

Christos FC shocks DC United in the U.S. Open Cup, Canada's own Freddy Adu (seriously, this will never get old), two Real Madrid players in court, the manager who was fired with a poem, and Howler gives you the soccer ball phone

Howler made a funny parody video. Watch it here: https://fifa.wtf/2s7nqar

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North and South Korean might put together the daddy of all World Cup bids, Cristiano Ronaldo is becoming a daddy again, Newcastle might be getting a new daddy and Neymar has the daddy of transfer values! For more on today's stories, click here: fifa.wtf/2eECYv1 And subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter here: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

Mexico and the U.S. play an entertaining 1-1 draw in their World Cup qualifier, England win the (U-20) World Cup, the UAE doesn't even want Qatari referees, new kickoff times for the Premier League? And, the worst decision of Emmanuel Adebayor's career. For more on today's stories, click here: fifa.wtf/2eECYv1 And subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter here: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

On today's Goalmouth: The USA win the acronym battle with T&T, Zlatan's leaving Manchester, Nolito really wants to leave Manchester, Leo Messi is getting married and the #wengerOut campaign gets political! Make your inbox more soccer-savvy by subscribing to the glorious Goalmouth newsletter: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

Very very reliable sources indicate Diego Costa probably won't be playing for Chelsea next season (hint: the source is Diego Costa), Liverpool might have broken up one too many of Southampton's relationships, Real Madrid to stick with Keylor Navas for at least the next 6 months, Alexis Sanchez isn't going to Manchester City, and the USA prepares for a World Cup qualifier against Trinidad and Tobago, who it seems might attempt to start the match in a literal bunker. Okay. Maybe not a literal one… but you see what I'm driving at…

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Secret MLS/USSF deal, Beckham buys Miami land, North Korean forced labor on Russian World Cup stadium, England fans banned for making Nazi gestures, Arda Turan assaults journalist and retires from international soccer, and Sergio Ramos is a pitch invader vigilante

Secret MLS/USSF deal, Beckham buys Miami land, North Korean forced labor on Russian World Cup stadium, England fans banned for making Nazi gestures, Arda Turan assaults journalist and retires from international soccer, and Sergio Ramos is a pitch invader vigilante

It's Daryl Grove with today's soccer news: Pulisic has a new boss, 2022 World Cup in doubt, Arsenal get a new left back, Liverpool get reported, and remembering Cheick Tiote.

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Real Madrid make Champions League history, Christian Pulisic saves the day, Mallory Pugh breaks her duck, Eden Hazard breaks his ankle, and Arsenal lose a club legend.

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On today's Goalmouth with Ryan Bailey: Antoine Griezmann's Premier League plans pooh-poohed! Ronaldo gives his opinion on Messi! Juventus Stadium is getting a new name! Liam Gallagher compares Zlatan to a cartoon chicken! And a former Premier League star is forced to address rumors of his own demise! For more on today's stories, subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

Atletico Madrid's transfer activity will be forcefully limited this summer, Real Madrid continue to flirtatiously bat their eyes in the direction of David de Gea while Manchester United deny that any flirtatious eye batting has occurred, Chelsea's already strong midfield might be getting even stronger, Manchester City's new goalkeeper should remember that his Twitter history is easily searchable, and Carlos Tevez had a goal wrongly disallowed and it seems the entire Chinese soccer system is to blame.

Weaponizing soccer art, a new record for an American transfer, the world's most expensive soccer clubs, and the world's most famous soccer players

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Cup final glory galore, Wenger in, Tuchel out, the most expensive American of all time, and Bruce Arena's World Cup qualifying roster.

It's Daryl Grove with all the soccer news.

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Yay! It's Friday! And Ryan Bailey said some words into a microphone and published them in a podcast! Thanks to today's sponsor, soccerpro.com. Save 10% on any soccer gear with the code GOALMOUTH19. For more on today's stories, subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

Manchester United are sort of kind of the Champions of Europe, the Chilean FA are either reckless tweeters or brilliant Twitter trolls, one Eintracht Frankfurt player learns that tattoos can be painful in more than one way, Bobby Wood is staying in the Bundesliga and another American might soon be joining him, and the USA get a win at the U20 World Cup!

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Police raids for Barcelona and PSG, Real Madrid buys the Brazilian Freddy Adu, Diego Maradona gets pwned by a Korean teenager, and Tyrone Mings just wants to touch the ball.

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Cristiano Ronaldo insists he's not a devil, John Terry steals the show, the Liga MX final is set, an unexpected tribute for Francesco Totti, and the robot bodyguard of the 2018 World Cup.

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Ryan Bailey guides you through today's soccer tidbits! This week's sponsor is X1 Fuel—a formula for before and after your workouts with no chemical ingredients, fillers, or excess sugars. Use the code "GOALMOUTH" at checkout for $10 off any order! X1 FUEL For more on today's stories, subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

Monaco are your new Ligue 1 champions and I now shudder to think how much money PSG will spend this summer to rectify that... No matter what happens in the Championship playoff final, Americans have even more reasons to watch the Premier League next season… Walter Mazarri and Watford part ways in roughly the same way that Fredo and the Corleone family did in The Godfather Part II… Inter Milan probably won't be triggering the buyout clause in Mauricio Pochettino's Tottenham Contract… and the transfer rumor mill has kicked into gear.

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Mallory Pugh signs with the worst NWSL team, Bayern threatens to sue newspaper over transfer rumor, chances of a BPL playoff, Bebeto's baby signs for Sporting Lisbon, England vs. Spain in UEFA U-17 threedux, and the most amazing own goal you might ever see.

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Chelsea crowned, Sunil Gulati challenged, Nacho thinks fast, Virtual Reality soccer in the Champions League final, and Ryan Hollingshead is back where he belongs.

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A slew of new champions, Carli Lloyd continues her Wembley domination, the final four is set in Liguilla, James says goodbye to Real Madrid?, and Ezequiel Lavezzi apologizes for being incredibly dumb.

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Man United are embarrassing! Swansea players are generous! Fabian Johnson is under contract! Cristiano Ronaldo is very rich! And the college team who are heading towards the Europa League! Ryan Bailey takes you through today's bite-sized soccer news. For more on today's stories, subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

Karim Benzema and Real Madrid skip past Atletico to book their spot in the Champions League Final, Philippe Coutinho is for sale for slightly more than the GDP of Micronesia, Africa officially gets more slices of the World Cup pie, Wolverhampton trust in agent fees rather than actual managerial knowhow, Francesco Totti confirms that he hasn't confirmed those earlier reports that confirmed that he's retiring, and Lothar Matthaus could soon be throwing shade at Alexi Lalas on a TV screen near you.

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FIFA has dismissed two key ethics officials (yes, FIFA has ethics officials), Emerson Hyndman returns to Bournemouth, the 104th US Open Cup kicks off, Champions League semifinals, the 2019 Copa América could include six teams not from South America, adorable Liverpool U-9s take on Coutinho and Wijnaldum, Messi lookalike lands in Iranian jail

US keeper gets triple-megged, 2026 World Cup bid to be fast-tracked, Orlando gets a World Cup qualifier, Dutch take another sip of Advocaat,Monaco attempt the impossible, and Robert Kovac is a real-life superhero.

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Wenger finally beats Mourinho, Mexico beat the U.S. in a cup final, Zlatan has superhuman knees, Chapecoense get something to smile about, and Maradona gets a new job.

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The Premier League might be getting play-offs this season! Manchester United's European dream is still very much alive! Neymar's prison sentence is a thing! U-20 World Cup update and the introduction of sin bins! Find all this and more in today's Goalmouth, presented by Ryan Bailey. For more on today's stories, subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V Don't forget to check out today's sponsor: SoccerPro. If you use the code "GOALMOUTH18" at checkout for orders of $50 or more, then you'll qualify for free shipping.

Monaco's Cinderella story gets a Red Wedding-esque conclusion, Manchester United and Celta Vigo might be our only hope of a dramatic semifinal in a European cup competition, Ajax get biblical on Lyon, Franceso Totti may be mortal after all, the US U17s continue to put a hurting on their CONCACAF opponents, and more English soccer than ever will be streaming to a small screen near you next season.

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U.S. Soccer has a 100 million dollar problitunity, Cristiano Ronaldo proves he doesn't have to be offside to get a hat trick, Sulley Muntari receives further punishment for being the target of racial abuse from random strangers, the Russian Cup final with four red cards in the final 20 seconds, meet the man who is making a fortune selling all those "Wenger Out" signs, and the Indian club planning a… hunger strike.

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Emre Can defies gravity, Matt Miazga lifts a trophy, US men's team to face Ghana ( again), Diego Simeone desparately seeking right backs, and Zlatan's surgery a success, says agent.

It's Daryl Grove mispronouncing Dutch words in today's Goalmouth.

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Spurs do the impossible, Lyon and Alex Morgan reach the Champions League final, Sulley Muntari is punished for being racially abused, Cristiano Ronaldo sets another record, and an unlikely hero in Liga MX.

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Ryan Bailey is here with around five minutes of the latest soccer news for your ears! The Timbers are expanding their stadium! Possibly using Timber! Marcus Rashford did an amazing thing! FIFA are corrupt! Julia Roberts trolled Sergio Ramos! And the world's dumbest Arsenal fan. For more on today's stories, subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V.

It's Taylor Rockwell from The Total Soccer Show bringing you the hottest of hot news:

Christian Pulisic's mere presence inspires Dortmund to a win over Bayern Munich, Monaco's reserves were allowed onto the pitch and catastrophe ensued, Javier Mascherano is now only 501 goals behind Leo Messi on Barcelona's scoring charts, the 2018 World Cup will have cameras everywhere but not in a way that will comfort traveling fans, the US U17s continue to make everyone cautiously optimistic about the 2026 World Cup, and cinema's shortest serial killer is kind of now a Champion of CONCACAF.

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28 MLS players earn at least $1 million per year but none of them play for the league's best team, the Amsterdam Arena gets a new name, Cesc Fabregas breaks a milestone, Newcastle and West Ham are in trouble, and South American goalkeepers keep doing crazy things

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Pro/Rel for at least one American, a big win for the US U17s, Player's Player of the Year named in England, juicy transfer rumors ahoy, plus: why one Italian team has already won at summer shopping

It's Daryl Grove with all today's soccer news. Which is worse: His French accent or his Geordie accent?

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Ryan Bailey guides you through today's top soccer news in bite-sized form. For more on today's stories, subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

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It's Daryl Grove with today's bite-size soccer news — plus a mini-rant about why you should be nice to Tim Howard. Warning: features Star Trek jokes. Sign up for Th Goalmouth email here: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

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It's a highly caffeinated Daryl Grove with all today's soccer news. No refunds!

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Ryan Bailey is back with a pooh-pooh platter of bite-sized soccer news! For more on today's stories, click here: fifa.wtf/2eECYv1 And subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter here: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z

Ryan Bailey charts a course for quick soccer updates! For more on today's stories, click here: fifa.wtf/2eECYv1 And subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter here: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z

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Daryl Grove wth today's soccer news ...

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Apologies to your mothers! Ryan Bailey is out of town so it's Daryl Grove with today's soccer news. Also, please sign up for the Goalmouth email, here: http://fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

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Ryan Bailey takes on Tuesday's headlines on today's Goalmouth. For more on these stories, click here: fifa.wtf/2eECYv1 And subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter here: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

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Ryan Bailey guides you through the biggest headlines of the day. For more on today's stories, subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

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Daryl Grove with this morning's soccer news.

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Ryan Bailey delivers the very latest bite-sized soccer news. For more on today's stories, subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

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Daryl Grove with today's soccer news.

(Republished after hosting error published audio as text file)

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Ryan Bailey delivers some delicious bite-sized soccer morsels. For more on today's stories, click here: fifa.wtf/2eECYv1 And subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter here: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

Daryl Grove delivers six minutes and 50 seconds of news plus 10 seconds of editorializing. Subscribe to The Goalmouth newsletter here: fifa.wtf/2cS0Z5V

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