Podcasts by Category
Welcome to Paleo Bites, the weekly podcast hosted by Matthew Donald where we make dumb jokes, reference pop culture, derail like crazy, and oh yeah, discuss and rate dinosaurs and other prehistoric animals. Each episode Matthew and a rotating set of guest co-hosts talk about a different genus of primeval critter, explain basic stats, exchange plenty of banter, barely fact-check, and at the end, rate the creature one out of 65 million for any reason, including but not limited to sexiness, mana, and dexterity. So join Matthew and his friends as we embark on this prehistoric odyssey and review the dinosaurs from Aardonyx to Zuul as well as many other extinct beasts, entertaining folks while undoubtedly making serious paleontologists weep. Musical sting by Magnus Ringblom from Epidemic Sound.
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- 333 - Polacanthus, the One with Many Spikes
(image source: https://a-z-animals.com/animals/polacanthus/)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Polocanthus… barely. Just a headsup, there’s a lot of tangents in this one, and there’s even more in the unedited version, which you can find on the Patreon. Fun times! This show is so professional. From the Early Cretaceous, this 16-foot nodosaurid had multiple spikes; many, one might say. Honestly, what else did you want to hear about Polacanthus? Its name sums it up pretty well, I’d say! Be happy with what you got.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 10 Feb 2026 - 23min - 332 - Mapusaurus, the Lizard of the Earth
(image source: https://paleontologyworld.com/sites/default/files/styles/Mapusaurus_0.png)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Mapusaurus, a dinosaur with a name that sounds like Borat describing a dinosaur made out of his crap. “Mah poo saurus!” Except it’s actually named for the indigenous Mapuche people in South America, so stop making crass jokes like that, you racist. From the Late Cretaceous, this 40-foot carcharodontosaurid had some pretty good evidence of social behavior, even perhaps pack-hunting. Because the only thing that would be worse than encountering one of the biggest meat-eating land animals of all time is encountering a gang of his closest gym buddies. They’d all start a podcast, and it’d be horribly racist, much like the joke at the beginning of this description.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 03 Feb 2026 - 28min - 331 - Hydrodamalis gigas, the Steller's Sea Cow
(image source: https://www.britannica.com/animal/sea-cow)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Joel Rick discuss Hydrodamalis gigas, a manatee but big. Well, technically it was more closely related to dugongs, but y’all don’t know what those are and manatees get more clicks. From the Late Pleistocene to the Early Holocene, this 30-foot sirenian was a big player in the Ice Age and made it all the way to the eighteenth century… which means you probably can guess what happened next and why it’s extinct. Damn humans. I’m ashamed to be one of them. Maybe AI actually should take over the world…
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 27 Jan 2026 - 21min - 330 - Palaeophis, the Ancient Snake
(image source: https://www.deviantart.com/spinojp/art/Palaeophis-colossaeus-drinking-915269375)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Palaeophis, a literal sea serpent that was the biggest water snake to ever exist. Titanoboa who? That's what I thought. From the Early Paleocene to the Late Eocene, this 35-foot snake looked at the mosasaurs from the period past and was like “Heh, I can do that too, but slightly less big.” And it did! It’s nice sometimes to know your place enough to not always aim for the top. A comfortable C+. It’s what got me through college.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 20 Jan 2026 - 18min - 329 - Plateosaurus, the Broad Lizard
(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Plateosaurus-pictures)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Plateosaurus, a biggish bipedal herbivore and perhaps the biggest Triassic dinosaur, although not the biggest Triassic land animal as that goes to something like Lisowiciaor Sillosuchusor some crap. From the Late Triassic, this 30-foot basal sauropodomorph has a name that either means Broad Lizard or Flat Lizard; no one knows for sure because the original author of the paper didn’t detail what the name meant. If he didn’t care enough to explain why he named it, why should you care about it you might ask? I honestly have no idea. Go listen to something else.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 13 Jan 2026 - 31min - 328 - Danuvius, of the Celtic River God
(image source: https://www.sci.news/othersciences/anthropology/danuvius-guggenmosi-07779.html)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Danuvius, an ape that might have been the missing link between swinging through the trees, walking on the ground, and walking on two legs. That’s a lot of links we found in one animal. From the Early Miocene, this 3-foot-tall hominid basically swung on the ground on low vines while walking, kind of like a baby on one of those up-and-down jumper things. You know what I’m talking about, those jumping-baby-up-and-downs? That’s the technical term, yes. This is a professional show.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 06 Jan 2026 - 21min - 327 - Rapetosaurus, the Malagasy Giant Lizard Again
(image source: https://www.irishnews.com/lifestyle/2023/05/17/news/new_series_of_prehistoric_planet_brings_dinosaurs_back_to_life-3281275/)
In this fifth episode of Paleo Paleo Bites, where the show takes a month off releasing new episodes so Matthew Donald can rebuild a backlog of episodes to release later (I’ve got holiday plans, okay?! Leave me alone, you Krampus!) and digs up older episodes to rerelease and keep the demons I sold my soul to in order to keep this show running satisfied, host Matthew Donald and co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Rapetosaurus. It’s a big longneck. What do you expect? It’s actually not even that big compared to other longnecks. Boy, I’m sure selling this hard, huh? See with you new episodes in 2026!
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 30 Dec 2025 - 24min - 326 - Proa, the Prow of Val de Arino Again
(image source: https://www.thoughtco.com/ornithopod-dinosaur-pictures-and-profiles-4043320)
In this fourth episode of Paleo Paleo Bites, where the show takes a month off releasing new episodes so Matthew Donald can rebuild a backlog of episodes to release later (I got a life outside this show, believe it or not!) and digs up older episodes to rerelease and keep the weekly content consumers happy, host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Laura Owsley discuss Proa. Proa? I barely even know-a. That’s a quality joke. See you with new episodes in 2026!
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 23 Dec 2025 - 27min - 325 - Albertosaurus, the Alberta Lizard Again
(image source: https://pixels.com/featured/albertosaurus-mohamad-haghani.html)
In this third episode of Paleo Paleo Bites, where the show takes a month off releasing new episodes so Matthew Donald can rebuild a backlog of episodes to release later (this show has been consistent for over half a decade at this point, give me a break) and digs up older episodes to rerelease and keep the weekly release record going, host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lawrence Mack discuss Albertosaurus. Three guesses where it’s from, and the first two don’t count. No, not Mt. Elbert, you idiot. See you with new episodes in 2026!
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 16 Dec 2025 - 28min - 324 - Orkoraptor, the Toothed River Thief Again
(image source: https://jurassicdna.com/dino-tracker/orkoraptor/)
In this second episode of Paleo Paleo Bites, where the show takes a month off releasing new episodes to Matthew Donald can rebuild a backlog of episodes to release later (it takes a lot to keep the weekly release of this show going for 6+ years!) and digs up older episodes to rerelease and thus keep the algorithm gods satisfied, host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lexi Ryan discuss Orkoraptor. It’s a raptor ork. That’s pretty cool. WAAAAAAGH! That was a 40k reference. See you with new episodes in 2026!
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 09 Dec 2025 - 21min - 323 - Tullimonstrum, the Monster of Francis Tully Again
(image source: https://www.reddit.com/r/LifeBeforeUs/comments/147x7b2/tullimonstrum_gregarium_the_enigmatic_tully/)
In this first episode of Paleo Paleo Bites, where the show takes a month off releasing new episodes so Matthew Donald can rebuild a backlog of episodes to release later (life is hard, yo) and digs up older episodes to rerelease and thus keep the content farm going, host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Tullimonstrum. I mean… just look at it! It’s so crazy that this thing existed. Or maybe it didn’t. Oooooh. See you with new episodes in 2026!
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Tue, 02 Dec 2025 - 16min - 322 - Borealopelta, the Northern Shield
(image source: https://novataxa.blogspot.com/2017/08/borealopelta.html)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Borealopelta, a stout armored bugger that would have been mediocrely notable if it weren’t for, I dunno, have literally the best preserved fossil of all time? Seriously, the mummification made it so we could even see its organs. There’s no joke here, that’s just damn cool. From the Early Cretaceous, this 18-foot nodosaur is so well preserved that we know its color, a reddish-brown built for camouflage. Seriously, what the hell did this thing need camouflage for?! Were those spikes made of taffy? This fossil seriously shocked me so much that I forgot that it lived far before Albertosaurus and kept saying in the episode that Albertosaurus could have maybe preyed on it, so sorry about that.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 25 Nov 2025 - 20min - 321 - Miragaia, of the Earth Goddess
(image source: https://dinopedia.fandom.com/wiki/Miragaia)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Miragaia, a long-necked stegosaur that could be mistaken for a sauropod, as long as one ignored those spikes and plates. They blend in, so I get it. From the Late Jurassic, this 20-foot stegosaur is currently in the crosshairs of big bad paleontologists like Jack Horner threatening to absorb it into the genus Dacentrurus, which look, I know it’s science and science should persist no matter our personal desires, but c’mon, Miragaiais a cool name! Don’t invalidate it! I still have difficulties pronouncing that “ruru” in Dacentrurus.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 18 Nov 2025 - 17min - 320 - Hypsilophodon, the High-Ridged Tooth
(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Hypsilophodon-pictures)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Hypsilophodon, a tiny dinosaur with an unremarkable appearance and a ridiculously convoluted taxonomical history. Just what our listeners have always wanted: a boring dinosaur with complicated info. Yay! From the Early Cretaceous, this 8 foot neornithoschian dinosaur was once thought to be related to a bunch of other boring dinosaurs that look like it, but it turns out nah, that boring plan they all came up with independently. That’s cool I guess.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 11 Nov 2025 - 27min - 319 - Peteinosaurus, the Winged Lizard
(image source: https://www.dreamstime.com/peteinosaurus-reptile-tail-was-carnivorous-flying-pterosaur-lived-italy-triassic-period-image156432121)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Peteinosaurus, an early pterosaur that’s notable in that it’s an early pterosaur and nothing else. Have you seen a small pterosaur? Then you’ve seen Peteinosaurus. I’m really selling this episode, huh? From the Late Triassic, this 4-foot-wingspan eopterosaurid might have been an early dimorphodontid, whatever that’s worth. Man, I don’t mean to be too harsh on this guy, I’m sure he’s a lovely fellow. I’d love to have beers with him someday.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 04 Nov 2025 - 23min - 318 - Dalyia, the Clustered One
(image source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dalyia)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Nobody McNooneson discuss Dalyia, a creature that no one gives a damn about so it functions perfectly as doubling up as an apology and explanation for what happened to Paleo Bites-oween and why it ended early. I pity the poor singular Dalyiafan that was really excited when this popped up in their feed and were like "YEAAAAAH, finally some recognition!" I look forward to their angry email. From the Late Cambrian, this worm-like organism of an indeterminate size is also known as the Clustered One with its species name racemata, making it the perfect metaphor for my situation and me as a whole. I'mthe clustered one. That's deep, guys.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Sun, 02 Nov 2025 - 6min - 317 - Purgatorius, of Purgatory Hill
(image source: https://www.nationalgeographic.com/science/article/did-ancient-primates-walk-alongside-dinosaurs-new-evidence-backs-up-theory)
Happy Paleo Bites-oween, where we will host Halloween themed episodes all week, every day! On this fourth day of Paleo Bites-oween, this one on actual Halloween (but don’t worry, the celebration of Paleo Bites-oween will last the whole week still) host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Purgatorius, a tiny squirrel-like mammal that seems innocent enough until you learn that it eventually evolved into the most terrifying monster of all… HUMANITY. AAAAGH! Yes, humans are the real monsters. I’ve read Frankenstein. From the Early Paleocene, this 6-inch primatomorph survived the meteor that killed the dinosaurs and then kept on surviving until it became us. See, it’s Purgatoriusbecause up until it survived and evolved into later representatives in the human ancestry, it had a choice between Heaven or Hell, and by choosing to continue to evolve into humans, it chose Hell.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Fri, 31 Oct 2025 - 19min - 316 - Zuul, the Destroyer of Shins Again
(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Zuul-picture)
Happy Paleo Bites-oween, where we will host Halloween themed episodes all week, every day! On this third day of Paleo Bites-oween, host Matthew Donald unearths an older Halloween episode from years back to rerelease in all of its glory. Kind of like a fossil. Or a mummy. From the Late Cretaceous, this 20-foot ankylosaur had a really big tail club and a really funny name, based off the demon dog from Ghostbusters. And just like Ghostbusters, 100% of this episode was improvised. I can only assume that Ghostbusters had no script and was just the actors riffing, anyway.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Thu, 30 Oct 2025 - 16min - 315 - Vampyronassa, the Vampiric Fish Trap
(image source: https://prehistoric-wiki.fandom.com/wiki/Vampyronassa)
Happy Paleo Bites-oween, where we will host Halloween themed episodes all week, every day! On this second day of Paleo Bites-oween, host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lexi Ryan discuss Vampyronassa, a fricking vampire squid… it’s not as cool as it sounds. From the Late Jurassic, this 4-inch vampyromorph cephalopod is basically the same as the one vampire squid species around today, except it lacks retractile filaments. Whatever those are. I don’t have those either, as I have retractile dysfunction. Thank you, thank you, I’ll be here all week. I mean, literally, as it’s Paleo Bites-oween.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Wed, 29 Oct 2025 - 23min - 314 - Desmodus draculae, the Giant Dracula Bat
(image source: https://www.sportskeeda.com/esports/how-find-desmodus-ark-survival-evolved-fjordur)
Happy Paleo Bites-oween, where we will host Halloween themed episodes all week, every day! On this first day of Paleo Bites-oween, host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Desmodus draculae, the biggest vampire bat ever known and thus a perfect way to start off the spooky season. Except it’s not that spooky. Or that big. It’s actually kind of cute. Look at it, happily licking up that blood from the incision on the Macrauchenia. Dawwww. From the Late Pleistocene, this 2.5-foot-wingspan bat first evolved millions of years ago but might have lived all the way up to the 18th century. I guess it’s those vampire lifespans of theirs. They live forever, after all. I’ve read Twilight.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 28 Oct 2025 - 19min - 313 - Zalmoxes, of the Dacian Deity
(image source: https://images.dinosaurpictures.org/Zalmoxes_FI_38b7.jpg)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host… well, there was a guy there, my best friend also named Matt, but he’s already served his time doing Paleo Bites back in the day so he was silent here, discuss Zalmoxes, a teeny iguanodontid that lived on the Romanian islands back in the day and thus underwent island dwarfism. That’s cool. Almost as cool as doing this impromptu episode in the middle of a queue at Universal Studios’ Jurassic Park River Adventure. Equally cool. Take that however you will. From the Late Cretaceous, this 8-foot rhabdodontid probably deserves a bigger episode than this one, but come on, no one actually cares about Zalmoxes, right? Watch as the three Zalmoxes fans rage at me through the Paleo Bites official email… paleobitespodcast@gmail.com, by the way.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 21 Oct 2025 - 7min - 312 - Thanatosdrakon, the Dragon of Death
(image source: https://lorosyguacamayos.com.ar/ave-voladora-mas-grande-de-la-historia-dinosaurio/)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-hosts Jaymes Buckman (and their friend Jamie) discuss Thanatosdrakon, a huge pterosaur with a fricking awesome name. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say this thing was described in the 90s or early 2000s when everything was super-edgy. From the Late Cretaceous, this 30-foot-wingspan azhdarchid flew and stalked across prehistoric South America like the dragon of death it is… I guess. I mean, it is just an animal still. But what do I know? Nothing. That’s why I host this podcast. I’m qualified.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 14 Oct 2025 - 29min - 311 - Drinker, of Edward Drinker Cope
(image source: https://images.dinosaurpictures.org/Drinker/Drinker_latest_acb4.jpg)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Cygnus D. Stonewell (the D stands for Dinosaur) discuss Drinker, a dinosaur that’s actually now called Nanosaurusand was absorbed into that genus alongside Othnielosaurusand Laosaurus but hey, “Drinker” will get more clicks so here it is! We live in a capitalistic tar pit that we can never escape, folks. From the Late Jurassic, this 9-foot neornithischian had an interesting taxonomical history as our paleontological knowledge of it increased over the decades, and there is absolutely nothing else interesting about it. Seriously, look at this thing! It’s so boring! I need a drink just looking at it. Song at the end by one of our future overlords Suno AI, while the rest of this episode is, as you probably expected by now, 100% improvised. Now youneed a drink, I bet.
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Tue, 07 Oct 2025 - 17min - 310 - Ikrandraco, the Dragon of the Avatar Banshee
(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Ikrandraco-pictures)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Ikrandraco, a big flying reptile named after a creature from the highest grossing movie series of all time. “No cultural footprint” my ass! From the Early Cretaceous, this 5-foot-wingspan pterosaur flapped around in its homeland in the two countries we’ve found it in, China and England. You know, those basically nextdoor neighbors. Then again, maybe they took a space bridge to get between them through some Pandoran magic. James Cameron, write that into your next sequel!
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th, 2024! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 30 Sep 2025 - 17min - 309 - Anurognathus, the Frog Jaw
(image source: https://jurassic-world-san-diego.fandom.com/wiki/Anurognathus)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Anurognathus, a freaky looking bat-frog thing that’s actually a pterosaur and thus closely related to birds and crocodiles. Nature’s weird, I gotta say. From the Late Jurassic, this 12-inch anurognathid pterosaur ate bugs and flapped its little wings and probably got terrified of moths. That’s just speculation, but it makes sense, right? I’m terrified of moths. I’m also really attracted to them and want them to step on me. Oh wait, those are goths.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 23 Sep 2025 - 26min - 308 - Corythosaurus, the Helmeted Lizard
(image source: https://jurassicpark.fandom.com/wiki/Corythosaurus/JW:_E)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lawrence Mack discuss Corythosaurus, a duckbilled dinosaur with a helmet on its head… except not so much a helmet, as I doubt it would help much against collisions with street pavement or Ankylosaurus clubs. But hey, maybe it would. I’d welcome being surprised. From the Late Cretaceous, this 30-foot lambeosaurine hadrosaurid is one of the few animals we know how it sounded, as we’ve 3D-printed its skull and blown air through it to simulate the noise those crests would help make. You’ve seen Jurassic Park 3, right? We all have, that classic film. Funnily enough, that’s the only Jurassic Park film this dinosaur is in! It’s almost like destiny.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 16 Sep 2025 - 25min - 307 - Argentinosaurus, the Argentine Lizard
(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Argentinosaurus-pictures)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Argentinosaurus, a really, really, REALLY big longneck. Like, REALLY big. Oh, and it’s also from Argentina. From the Late Cretaceous, this 100-foot titanosaurid was… goddang, it was SO big! Like seriously, look at it! LOOK AT IT! I am bereft of joke-making capability seeing this thing! At least, even more bereft than I normally am.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 09 Sep 2025 - 22min - 306 - Rhamphorhynchus, the Beak Snout
(image source: https://fossil.fandom.com/wiki/Rhamphorhynchus)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Rhamphorhynchus, a sea pterosaur with a lot of pointy teeth and even more unnecessary H’s in its name. No word should have that many ‘H’ letters in it, and if you disagree, shhhh! From the Late Jurassic, this six-foot wingspan pterosaur had a big pointy fin at the end of its tail that inspired a lot of dragon art, which is pretty cool. Not as cool as if this thing somehow actually breathed fire, but hey, I’ll take it.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 02 Sep 2025 - 17min - 305 - Vaderlimulus, the Horseshoe Crab of Darth Vader
(image source: https://www.deviantart.com/ntvtiko/art/Vaderlimulus-tricki-754817629)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Vaderlimulus, a horseshoe crab that looked like Darth Vader, or at least like the top of Darth Vader’s helmet. The hat part of the helmet, you know? I bet this gives great helmet. From the Early Triassic, this 4-inch xiphosuran arthropod was your father… at least if you were the little spawn of one of these things. If not, and you’re just a lousy human, this isn’t your father. In terms of the family tree of life, this thing is closer to your father’s brother’s nephew’s cousin’s former roommate.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 26 Aug 2025 - 14min - 304 - Kosmoceratops, the Ornate Horned Face
(image source: https://eartharchives.org/articles/kosmoceratops-was-the-frilliest-of-all-the-ceratopsians/)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lawrence Mack discuss Kosmoceratops, a very horny dinosaur in that it had the most horns of any horned dinosaurs. Although maybe it was also horny in the other sense. What it did in its time is none of my business. From the Late Cretaceous, this 16-foot centrosaurine ceratopsian wasn’t space-themed like its name suggested, which is a shame, as I love the idea of dinosaurs in space. I mean, I guess we’re all in space, aren’t we? Ugh, way to ruin the magic.
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 19 Aug 2025 - 20min - 303 - Shunosaurus, the Lizard of the Sichuan Province
(image source: https://jurassicpark.fandom.com/wiki/Shunosaurus/JW:_TG?file=Shunosaurus.png)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Shunosaurus, a small longneck dinosaur that’s not very notable except it has a club at the end of its tail. That’s not that notable either, Shunny-boy. I have a club too! A “Cool Dino Fan” club, currently the only members being me and my mom. From the Mid to Late Jurassic, this 35-foot eusauropod sauntered around its marshy Jurassic scrubland while evolving its tail specifically to deal with the most badass of all dinosaurs, my boy Sinraptor. You know my favorite dinosaur is powerful if it forces fricking SAUROPODS to evolve further defensive measures like club tails. I don’t care if that might not be the main reason, because it absolutely is in my book! God, I love Sinraptorso much…
Want to further support the show? Subscribe to our YouTube channel at https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdXnbmbdvKBVoUexcFBgMNQ for ad-free episodes, and sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 12 Aug 2025 - 21min - 302 - Hatzegopteryx, the Wing of Hateg Basin
(image source: https://image.pbs.org/video-assets/5kg0O0I-asset-mezzanine-16x9-RIS0K1C.png)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Hatzegopteryx, the last shadow the poor dwarf dino islanders of the Hateg basin ever saw. Oh, watch out, Zalmoxes! You’re gonna get et by a jet. From the Late Cretaceous, this 36-foot wingspan azhdarchid pterosaur was basically a giraffe with wings. And a big beak poke of death. And was carnivorous. And could fly. So not really a giraffe. But it looked like one on the ground at least! And was about as big as one, too.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 05 Aug 2025 - 25min - 301 - "Suciasaurus rex," the State Dinosaur of Washington
(image source: https://www.heraldnet.com/northwest/suciasaurus-rex-named-washington-states-official-dinosaur/)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Jason Zolle discuss “Suciasaurus rex,” an informally named fossil that’s probably Daspletosaurus or something but that’s not the state dinosaur of Washington, is it? Listen to our episode on that particular genus. Oh wait, we haven’t actually done an episode on Daspletosaurus yet. Someday, though. From the Late Cretaceous, this possible 30-foot tyrannosaur is from a region that’s terrible with fossil retention, what with the wet soil and volcanic activity, so it’s a miracle anything was found there. Washington’s a crazy place, kids. It’s got volcanoes and rain there. And sparkly vampires. And “Suciasaurus rex,” I suppose. Also, apologies for the lower audio quality, it’s just this one episode!
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 29 Jul 2025 - 17min - 300 - Hoplitosaurus, the Hoplite Lizard
(original image source: https://images.dinosaurpictures.org/sauropelta_5c34.jpg)
Happy 300 episodes! Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Leonychus the Hoplitosaurus, King of the Lakota Formation, discuss (by performing an overly dramatic farcical audiodrama) Hoplitosaurus, a heavily defended creature that fought the encroaching Acrocanthosaurus armies... except that dinosaur was from a different formation and there's no evidence these two species met. But that's why they're encroaching in this fictitious narrative! Madness? This… is… the LAKOTA FORMATION! From the Early Cretaceous, this 10-foot polacanthid nodosaur lived in dense forests with giant pterosaurs likely flying overhead, meaning it would fight in the shade… okay, that’s enough of those references. Except no, there’s never enough. Not when you reach 300 episodes for some godforsaken reason. If you thought you’d get a good episode of this show, you’re in for a wild night. Tonight you dine in HELL!
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
TRACK LIST:
• 2025 Tension No Copyright Background Music...
• 'The Army of Minotaur' by @Makai-symphony ...
• [Non Copyrighted Music] @MiguelJohnson - G...
• 💣 Copyright Free Military Music - "Legionn...
• 🐫 Persian & Desert (Royalty Free Music) - ...
• 🙁 Sad & Orchestral (Free Music) - "FOR THE...
• ⭐ Triumph (Royalty Free Music) - "KNIGHT O...
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Tue, 22 Jul 2025 - 15min - 299 - Rhizodus, the Rooted Tooth
(image source: https://dinopedia.fandom.com/wiki/Rhizodus)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lawrence Mack discuss Rhizodus, the largest ever freshwater fish that had so much rizz it lived for 30 million whole years. Rhizodus-dizz, thanks for all the rizz! From the Early Carboniferous, this 20-foot sarcopterygian was actually more closely related to us humans than other fish, although it wasn’t necessarily a direct ancestor, just related. I will personally leave no descendants, so the birthing line from LUCA to me ends with me. Four billion years, and it stops here. You’re welcome, Earth.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 15 Jul 2025 - 20min - 298 - Shantungosaurus, the Lizard of the Shandong Province
(image source: https://makerworld.com/en/models/767570-shantungosaurus)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Shantungosaurus, a big big BIG duckbilled dinosaur, and in fact the biggest non-sauropod dinosaur ever! Then again, I’m the biggest guy named Matthew who’s written a book called Megazoic. Probably, anyways. From the Late Cretaceous, this 56-foot saurolophine hadrosaurid dealt with its own Chinese version of T. rexcalled Zhuchengtyrannus, making it a prequel of sorts to the T. rexand Edmontosaurusdynamic of North America. That’s what the best follow-up installments of classics do; take the original characters, and put them in Asia.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 08 Jul 2025 - 20min - 297 - Catactegenys, the Crushing Jaw
(image source: http://bit.ly/4kjy8Dk)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Catactegenys, a type of night lizard, which is a group still alive today BUUUUT there’s a really big and exciting study about them involving the big meteor that killed the dinosaurs so it counts. I make the rules! From the Late Cretaceous to the Late Holocene (i.e., right now), this family of squamate reptiles might have been the only terrestrial vertebrates to survive in the vicinity of the Chicxulub impactor in Mexico. Like, right next to it, when everything else got vaporized. How did they do it?! Life is crazy, yo.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 01 Jul 2025 - 20min - 296 - Shuvuuia, the Mongolian Bird
(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Shuvuuia-pictures)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-hosts Jaymes Buckman and their boyfriend Toby discuss Shuvuuia, the tiny, quirky desert-dwelling dino-bird-thing that proves you don’t need claws, wings, or teeth to be iconic, just a good sense of direction and a thirst for termites. Yum. From the Late Cretaceous, this 3-foot alvarezsaurid scurried through the Mongolian night with killer hearing and night vision like the prehistoric version of a goth owl. Meanwhile, I had to scurry through the editing process this week because life threw me a boss battle and I’m still waiting on my power-ups. So if you hear any swears without Velociraptor screeches to bleep them out, call it the director’s cut! But at least Paleo Bites’ perfect weekly release streak continues, because when everything else feels chaotic, dinosaurs are the constant. Even though they’re dead. At least the non-avian ones.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 24 Jun 2025 - 29min - 295 - Gallimimus, the Chicken Mimic
(image source: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/gallimimus-paleoart-by-me--236087205460103553/)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Gallimimus, a classic dinosaur and pioneer of the visual effects industry… at least for us humans. I doubt it dabbled in any visual effects work itself. From the Late Cretaceous, this 20-foot ornithomimosaur had its big scene in Jurassic Park where it ran in glorious early 90s CGI and revolutionized filmmaking to the woes of anti-CGI film bros everywhere. Also the animal itself was pretty cool too. Sorry, I probably should mention that.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 17 Jun 2025 - 19min - 294 - Enhydriodon, the Otter Tooth
(image source: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/676736281530757612/)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Laura Owsley discuss Enhydriodon, a giant species of otter that you really otter avoid. That’s the kind of humor you should expect on this show. I truly can’t believe we’re nearing 300 episodes. From the Early Pliocene, this 7-foot mustelid was believed to be mostly terrestrial but very comfortable in the water, akin to the tigers of today. So it’s an otter not in the water? What’s the otter with this thing? Again, let me reiterate: THREE. HUNDRED. EPISODES. Of this show. Or at least close to it, anyway.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 10 Jun 2025 - 21min - 293 - Megantereon, the Giant Beast
(image source: https://newdinosaurs.com/megantereon/)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lawrence Mack discuss Megantereon, a fairly typical saber-toothed cat with one major claim to fame in that we have direct evidence of it hunting early humans, so any time you think there’s danger in the darkness, you can thank this guy for instilling that instinct into you. Thanks, Megantereon! I really appreciate running upstairs after turning off the basement lights so the Shadow Figure doesn’t get me; that’s peak childhood right there. From the Late Pliocene, this 6-foot machairodontid felid has a name that really isn’t indicative of its actual stature. This thing may be a slightly larger than normal cat, but “giant beast” it ain’t. Unless I also am a giant beast, which I suppose I am. I certainly eat like one, anyway.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 03 Jun 2025 - 21min - 292 - Scleromochlus, the Hard Limb
(image source: https://prehistoria.fandom.com/es/wiki/Scleromochlus)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Scleromochlus, a cute little dude with absolutely nothing remarkable about it on its own and is more interesting in what it evolved into; this guy was in fact an early ancestor of the pterosaurs! Celebrate, all ye boring people, in that eventually you might have more interesting descendents. From the Early Triassic, this 8-inch pterosauromorph archosaur had freakishly long legs and might have hopped all about like a demented frog. I dated someone with freakishly long legs who also hopped all around, it didn’t last long. Ugh, I swear, it’s only a matter of time before these descriptions will be written by ChatGPT.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 27 May 2025 - 22min - 291 - FUCA, the First Universal Common Ancestor
(image source: https://medium.com/@smartap3s/luca-and-fuca-our-great-great-great-grandmas-7880b0950e53)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-hosts Jennifer Grossman and Matt’s niece Logan (against his will) discuss FUCA, the original, original life before even LUCA was a thing, which I also covered with Jennifer about two hundred episodes earlier. From the Early Precambrian, this non-cellular entity was actually quite different from LUCA, in that while the latter had cells and enzymes and other biology that makes it more akin to a living organism, FUCA is just a glob of aimless amino acids. We really can’t go back much further than this on this show, which hey, thank God there’s a limit.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 20 May 2025 - 21min - 290 - Dromaeosaurus, the Running Lizard
(image source: https://dinopedia.fandom.com/wiki/Dromaeosaurus)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Dromaeosaurus, the namesake of the dromaeosaur family that are more commonly known as “raptors.” Which means Velociraptoris more the namesake of the family, but I’m talking scientifically! “Uh, actually, they’re not raptors, they’re dromaeosaurs.” Gee, thanks, Kyle. From the Late Cretaceous, this 7-foot coelurosaurian theropod had a much stronger bite than Velociraptor by a factor of three and could theoretically take down even bigger prey solo than it too. Poor Dromaeosaurus, always upstaged by Velociraptor not because it was better, but because it had the movie deal. Your big break will come too someday, Dromey.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 13 May 2025 - 19min - 289 - Smok, the Polish Dragon
(image source: https://alchetron.com/Smok-(archosaur))
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Laura Owsley discuss Smok, a basal archosaur that looks like a dinosaur but apparently is not. Look, it looks like one to me, but I ain’t no scientist. You should listen to them instead of this dumb show. From the Late Triassic, this 20-foot reptile was one of the top predators of its day and one of the largest of its time, facing off against the elephant-sized dicynodont Lisowiciawhile avoiding the rauisuchid Polonosuchus. You know what I noticed? None of those are dinosaurs! I was told in 3rd grade that dinosaurs roamed in three periods in Earth’s history, the Triassic, Jurassic, and Cretaceous. This is the Triassic, is it not? Where are all the dinosaurs?! Oh wait, there’s Liliensternusover there. Hi, Liliensternus! You in fact are a dinosaur.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 06 May 2025 - 19min - 288 - Dinocrocuta, the Terrible Hyena
(image source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dinocrocuta by Dmitry Bogdanov)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Dinocrocuta, which is not an awesome dinosaur/crocodile hybrid like the name suggests but is instead some lame hyena thing. Oh wait, it’s actually a fricking enormous hyena thing? Eh, it’s still not as cool as a dinocroc. From the Late Miocene, this 7-foot hyena thing had a bone-crushing bite and fought off saber-toothed cats like Amphimachairodus, which is pretty cool. It’s like Lion King, but prehistoric and with less singing. Not none, but less.
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Tue, 29 Apr 2025 - 32min - 287 - Kunpengopterus, the Kunpeng Wing
(image source: https://marchan-forest.blogspot.com/2021/)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Kunpengopterus, a monkey-like pterosaur in that it had opposable thumbs, which is pretty cool I gotta say. There’s no joke there, I genuinely think that’s cool. From the Late Jurassic, this 3-foot wukongopterid was first thought to be just a run-of-the-mill pterodactyloid before the aforementioned thumbs were discovered, and then scientists got all giddy and it got popular again! A monkey-dactyl? That’s freaking awesome! It’s so awesome it’s turned our usual snarky descriptions into sincere excitement! Something’s wrong, we’re acting too positive. We gotta make the next episode’s description extra cynical to rebalance the universe.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 22 Apr 2025 - 21min - 286 - Compsognathus, the Elegant Jaw
(image source: https://ar.inspiredpencil.com/pictures-2023/compsognathus)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Compsognathus, famously the smallest dinosaur of all but not so famously actually not the smallest dinosaur of all anymore, not even close. It’s been working out, getting yoked and stuff. From the Late Jurassic, this 4.5 foot theropod is now believed to not be part of its own little weird family but closer related to the megalosaurids and might even be even bigger than we think, and it’s already way bigger than I imagined! There’s working out, and then there’s taking ‘roids, Compy. We all see you, you not-so-little fraud.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 15 Apr 2025 - 17min - 285 - Elasmotherium, the Plated Beast
(image source: https://newdinosaurs.com/elasmotherium/)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Jaymes Buckman discuss Elasmotherium, a woolly rhino that’s not theWoolly Rhino but is woolly and is a rhino, so call it whatever you want I guess. From the late Pleistocene, this 18-foot rhinoceratid came equipped with a seriously metal nose horn coming out of its face. Except not literally metal, as like modern rhinos its horn was mainly made out of hair. Isn’t explaining jokes the best?
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 08 Apr 2025 - 20min - 284 - Homo sapiens, the Intelligent Man
(image source: https://www.publicdomainpictures.net/ )
April Fools, puny humans! Host Emperor Splozzitrox, Supreme Ruler of the Planet Zurkabong, and co-host Karzagloth, the underest of underlings, discuss Homo sapiens, the recently exterminated ground vermin that once overpopulated this hunk of space rock named Earth, a backwater planet in the Goozapeg Sector. From the Late Pleistocene to the Late Holocene, this 5-6 foot tall hominid may not have lived the longest, had the sharpest claws or teeth, or run or swim the fastest, but damn if they didn’t make an impact in their short tenure as Earth’s dominant intelligence. Shame about all those reality shows and Minion memes that led to their well-deserved cosmic obliteration.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
Special thanks to Matt David Seivert for contributing to this week's episode.
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Tue, 01 Apr 2025 - 23min - 283 - Megalograptus, the Great Writing
(image source: https://www.darwinsdoor.co.uk/timetour/the-ordovician-period.html)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Megalograptus, another nope of a creature but this time an ocean-bound nope, so it’s slightly more forgivable. Wait, I’ve just been told they can sometimes go onto land anyway? Nope, nope, NOPE! From the Late Ordovician, this 3-foot eurypterid got its bizarre name due to being mistaken for a group of animals whose remains looked like hieroglyphs embedded on the rock, not because it was a great writer or anything. Then again, I’d read a book written by a Megalograptus. What the hell would it be about? “The Crust That Binds Us: A Politico Manifesto on Inter-Arthropod Cooperations.”
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 25 Mar 2025 - 19min - 282 - Protoceratops, the First Horned Face
(image source: https://www.thoughtco.com/things-to-know-protoceratops-1093796)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Protoceratops, a hardy and stocky fellow with a tubby body and a grumpy attitude. I really relate to this creature. From the Late Cretaceous, this 8-foot ceratopsian lived in the desert with the more famous Velociraptorand the two of them really hit it off. They couldn’t keep their claws or beaks off each other. I wonder if anyone’s captured their interactions on video or… stone-agram? Dear god, what is this show?
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 18 Mar 2025 - 22min - 281 - Appalachiosaurus, the Appalachian Lizard
(image source: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/347129083760903111/)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lexi Ryan discuss Appalachiosaurus, a tyrannosaur living on the East Coast like some city slicker sellout. Never forget your Western roots here in Laramidia! Remember who you are! From the Late Cretaceous, this 25-foot theropod dinosaur is the only known dinosaur from its formation, as the fossils over there on the eastern side of North America aren’t really the best preserved. Those ice age glaciers eroded them away. There’s no joke here, I’m genuinely sad at the lost dinosaur knowledge. We really need a time machine.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 11 Mar 2025 - 31min - 280 - Ceratosaurus, the Horned Lizard
(image source: https://images.dinosaurpictures.org/Ceratosaurus3_1b79.jpg)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Ceratosaurus, an almost-famous dinosaur that often gets overshadowed by Allosaurus, which gets overshadowed by Saurophaganax, which just recently got overshadowed again by Allosaurusbecause the latter is now unfortunately dubious. At least Ceratosaurusitself overshadows poor Torvosaurus. When’s the last time you heard that name? From the Late Jurassic, this 20-foot theropod had a distinctive horn on its nose, which is kinda cool, although I also have a horn on my nose every day at band practice, so it’s not that cool really. I might be playing my horn wrong.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 04 Mar 2025 - 31min - 279 - A. anax, the Usurper of Saurophaganax
(image source: https://images.dinosaurpictures.org/Saurophaganax-Paul-Heaston1_2121.jpg)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Allosaurus anax, the new lord of the lizard eaters after supplanting the great and now dubious Saurophaganaxafter a hard-fought duel. There is truly no mercy sometimes in the battlefield of science. From the Late Jurassic, this 38-foot theropod was still basically everything we assumed Saurophaganaxto be and therefore just as cool in a practical sense, it just now lacks the kickass name and the individuality of its own genus, which ruins everything. Damn you, A. anax! This is officially my Pluto.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 25 Feb 2025 - 26min - 278 - Temnodontosaurus, the Cutting-Tooth Lizard
(image source: https://artpictures.club/autumn-2023.html)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Michele C. Hollow discuss Temnodontosaurus, a rather large marine reptile with potentially the largest eyes of any animal ever at 10 inches wide. Sheesh, my most impressive body part in terms of size is only half that length! From the Early Jurassic, this 30-foot ichthyosaur was discovered by Mary Anning back in the 1810s and was the first ichthyosaur to be scientifically described, which is a neat piece of history. Sometimes this show can be educational! I know, it surprises me too.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
You can find more from Michele at https://www.michelechollow.com/
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Tue, 18 Feb 2025 - 35min - 277 - Hippodraco, the Horse Dragon
(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Hippodraco-pictures)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Laura Owsley discuss Hippodraco, a dinosaur with a funny name that makes me think of hippos, horses, dragons, and a shipping portmanteau between Draco Malfoy and the hippogriff he tried to get killed. What a cacophony of emotions this guy brings out, especially for such a boring dinosaur. From the Early Cretaceous, this 15-foot iguanodontid was closely related to that one guy Proawe like to bang-on about, which also has a funny name. To think we’re reducing these fascinating paleontological finds with jokes about similar-sounding words and bully wizards banging lion-birds. Paleo Bites has been a real journey, folks.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 11 Feb 2025 - 23min - 276 - Magnolia, of Great Excellence
(image source: https://fineartamerica.com/featured/styracosaurus-eating-magnolias-with-lambeosaurus-phil-wilson.html)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Magnolia, another wonderful example of a prehistoric animal we cover on this show in that it is not an animal and is also still around today. It’s okay to break rules if you’re the one who makes them, kids. From the Mid Cretaceous to the Holocene onward, this plant of variable sizes has big paleontological significance, okay? That’s why we’re covering it! It’s important, I swear! Eh, who am I kidding, you’ve already hit “skip” on your playlist.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 04 Feb 2025 - 21min - 275 - Atlasaurus, the Lizard of the Titan Atlas
(image source: https://www.minizoo.com.au/eofauna-atlasaurus/)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Jaymes Buckman discuss Atlasaurus, a lanky and wonky longneck that looks just wrong and quite frankly disgusts me. Look at its proportions, look at it! It’s like if A.I. made a dinosaur. From the Mid Jurassic, this 49 foot sauropod had a shorter neck and more elongated limbs than its cousins like Brachiosaurus, turning it into this abomination. Seriously, I can’t get over how this thing looks. It’s the uncanny valley of longnecks. I want to squeeze and stretch it like play-doh until it’s fixed.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
Check out Jaymes at https://www.hotapollo.rocks/
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Tue, 28 Jan 2025 - 27min - 274 - Lokiceratops, the Horned Face of Loki
(image source: https://allthatsinteresting.com/lokiceratops-rangiformis)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lexi Ryan discuss Lokiceratops, a dinosaur with asymmetrical horns, much like my relationship with my girlfriend where we’re asymmetrical in our horniness for each other. From the Late Cretaceous, this 22-foot centrosaurine ceratopsid is an example of how bilateral symmetry can be varied among different creatures. I relate, as my left butt cheek is far more swole than my right. I tend to clench more with that one when I’m nervous, you see.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 21 Jan 2025 - 23min - 273 - Austroraptor, the Southern Thief
(image source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Austroraptor by Fred Wierum)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Austroraptor, a dromaeosaurid theropod masquerading as a spinosaurid theropod, because that sentence is comprehensible to more than hardcore dino nerds. From the Late Cretaceous, this 18-foot meat-eating dinosaur snapped up fish in the prehistoric jungles of Argentina, as opposed to Australia like I previously assumed. That’s why I got Ben here to host for me, I thought this was an Aussie! Even though Ben is not an Aussie, but a Kiwi. Eh, they’re all the same to dumb Yanks like me.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 14 Jan 2025 - 32min - 272 - Heterodontosaurus, the Different-Toothed Lizard
(image source: https://paleontologyworld.com/dinosaurs-%E2%80%93-species-encycolpedia/heterodontosaurus)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Heterodontosaurus, a very heteronormative dinosaur in that it had heterodont (or “differently-shaped”) teeth. Canceled! You’re canceled by the woke police, Heterodontosaurus! Love is love! Just ask Caihong, our rainbow-feathered dinosaur ally. From the Early Jurassic, this 6-foot ornithischian dinosaur lived in South Africa before its later descendants made their way to North America… kind of like another creature that is currently shadow-puppeting our presidency here in the States. Double-canceled, Heterodontosaurus! Go back to X along with your fellow elongated muskrat! No one else wants you!
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 07 Jan 2025 - 22min - 271 - Pulmonoscorpius, the Lunged Scorpion
(image source: https://prehistoricpark.fandom.com/wiki/Pulmonoscorpius)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Pulmonoscorpius, another nope of a nope that crept and crawled and stabbed and stung. Why don't you stay over there and I stay way over here, you big monster? I think that's an arrangement we can all agree on. From the Late Carboniferous, the 2.5-foot scorpion was an active diurnal predator rather than a sneaky nocturnal hider like its modern counterparts, which is good, as that'll make it easier for me to shoot.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 31 Dec 2024 - 29min - 270 - Uintatherium, the Beast of the Uinta Mountains
(image source: https://www.thoughtco.com/uintatherium-profile-1093289) Merry Christmas! Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host and one of Santa’s elves Snowdrop Jimjam Jollypie discuss Uintatherium, a big hoofed mammal kind of like a rhino but with these weird antler-things on its head like a reindeer on crack. That’s the Christmas connection I’m making, anyway. From the Eocene epoch, this 14-foot dinoceratan stomped about merrily and crushed the skulls of predators much like a toddler crushing fallen Christmas tree ornaments… okay, that was a stretch. At least this once-more 100% improvised episode should go better for Matthew than the Halloween one with the demon, right? What could possibly go wrong this time?!
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
Also, credit goes to Disney for that bit of instrumental audio from The Princess and the Frog that plays near the end.
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Tue, 24 Dec 2024 - 24min - 269 - Capromeryx, the Dwarf Pronghorn
(image source: https://alchetron.com/Capromeryx-minor)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Capromeryx, a teeny-tiny pronghorn with a teeny-tiny amount of information available, perfect for another teeny-tiny bite-sized episode. Dawww. From the Late Pliocene to the Early Holocene, this 2-foot hoofed mammal was among the smallest artiodactyl of all time, being no bigger than a hare. Dawww, what a cutie. So tiny, I bet it could easily be carried off by eagles and ripped apart by its beak and talons midair. Damn, where does my mind go sometimes?
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 17 Dec 2024 - 14min - 268 - Psittacosaurus, the Parrot Lizard
(image source: https://www.deviantart.com/lucas-attwell/art/Psittacosaurus-meileyingensis-752628599)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lexi Ryan discuss Psittacosaurus, an early representative of the dinosaurs that would later become Triceratopsand Styracosaurusand the like despite looking almost nothing like one. It has the parrot-like beak I guess. Oh wait, that’s how it got its name! I’m smart. From the Early Cretaceous, this 6-foot basal ceratopsian apparently had a fossilized impression uncovered of its butthole, meaning y’all should be careful with where you park your truck. You never know who might find out about it millions of years later!
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 10 Dec 2024 - 35min - 267 - Domeykodactlyus, the Finger of the Cordillera Domeyko
(image source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Domeykodactylus by FunkMonk (Michael B. H.))
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Domeykodactylus, a pterosaur with a fabulous piece of artwork for it that was the whole inspiration for this episode. We’re nothing if not easily motivated, folks. But seriously, look at that feathery coat! So fly. Haha, get it, “fly,” like pterosaurs did? Eh, forget it. From the Early Cretaceous, this 3.5-foot wingspan dsungaripterid had a stylish head crest in addition to its fire plumage, meaning this guy was fashionable for sure. It also probably ate fish and laid eggs on cliffs and flew away from dinosaurs and stuff, you know, like a real pterosaur. But hey, let me have fun imagining it as a fashionista!
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 03 Dec 2024 - 21min - 266 - Pentaceratops, the Five-Horned Face
(image source: https://www.everythingdinosaur.com/product/haolonggood-pentaceratops-lioutang/)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Pentaceratops, a large horned dinosaur just had to one-up Triceratopsin the horn quantity department, or technically two-up I guess, since five is two more than three. I’m mathing! From the Late Cretaceous, this 20-foot chasmosaurine ceratopsid actually really had three horns like most other chasmosaurines, it just had highly pronounced cheekbones that were mistaken for additional horns. Wow, this thing tried to two-up Triceratopsby cheating! Shameful, Pentaceratops, shameful.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 26 Nov 2024 - 30min - 265 - Notharctus, the False Bear
(image source: https://www.deviantart.com/willemsvdmerwe/art/Notharctus-tenebrosus-948425598)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Notharctus, a lemur-like creature that wasn’t actually a lemur nor was it a bear, but then again it is called “false” bear so it’s not technically misleading anyone. I just wonder who was dumb enough to think this was a bear to require clarification. From the Early Eocene, this 2-foot adapiforme primate lived in a time known as the Eocene Thermal Maximum, where things got really hot and rainforests covered the Earth. A worse time for everyone, basically. I don’t like heat. Come to think of it, I don’t like the cold either. I’m never happy.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 19 Nov 2024 - 19min - 264 - Caihong, the Crested Rainbow
(image source: Art by Gabriel Ugueto)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Laura Owsley discuss Caihong, a beautiful rainbow-feathered ally and one of the premiere examples of the evidence of dinosaur coloration. Slay, queen! From the Late Jurassic, this 1-foot anchiornithid theropod flew its glittering body over its Chinese forest home and spread its love all over like a sparkling fairy. Step aside, cisgender men; this is truly a dinosaur for the girls, gays, and theys.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 12 Nov 2024 - 27min - 263 - Thalassodromeus, the Ocean Runner
(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Thalassodromeus-pictures)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Thalassodromeus, a medium-sized pterosaur with a really, really big crest for its size; in fact potentially the biggest cranial crests of anyvertebrate! Damn, you didn’t need to go thathard, Mr. Thalass! From the Early Cretaceous, this 15-foot pterodactyloid is highly contentious in its placement in the pterosaur family tree, but currently it’s believed to be a tapejarid pterodactyloid. Give one out to the paleontologists for solving all of society’s real problems.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
Also it's Election Day today, so please for the love of God, if you haven't voted already, vote!!!
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Tue, 05 Nov 2024 - 22min - 262 - Diabloceratops, the Devil Horned Face
(image source: https://www.deviantart.com/nagrandia/art/Diabloceratops-574079826)
Happy Halloween! Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host/demon lord Morazmolochgallothagon discuss Diabloceratops, a dinosaur with literal devil horns and a ferocious attitude, making it a perfect new monster to enact further suffering upon Matthew’s soul. Mwuahaha. Wait, what? Who’s writing this?! From the Late Cretaceous, this 18-foot centrosaurine ceratopsian is another great addition to the spooky season themed episodes, especially ones that are once more 100% improvised such as this. For some reason these get a lot of downloads. Maybe it’s so people can laugh at Donald making a fool out of himself. Now, off to torture Donald some more. Mwuahahaha, hahahahahahaha!!! That’s right, Morazmolochgallothagon took over writing this description, by the way. Part of Matt’s penance for summoning a demon.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it...
Also, credit goes to Disney for that bit of instrumental audio from The Princess and the Frog that plays near the end.
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Tue, 29 Oct 2024 - 20min - 261 - Alpkarakush, of the Kyrgyz Mythical Bird
(image source: Art by Joschua Knüppe)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Alpkarakush, a medium-sized predatory dinosaur from the Middle Jurassic at the geographic midpoint of its family. A lot of mid, this guy. Maybe he isn’t that great. He’s mid, this one. From the Mid Jurassic, this 23-foot metriacanthosaurid was very closely related to my boy Sinraptor, the star of Matthew’s Megazoic books, so it was actually quite awesome and we will accept no slander of it. Anything that brings my baby more in the public eye is a win in my book.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 22 Oct 2024 - 31min - 260 - Gillicus, the Gilled One
(image source: https://dinosauralive.fandom.com/wiki/Gillicus)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Gillicus, a fish with gills… you know, like literally all fish. You ain’t special, Gillicus. We see you for who you are. From the Late Cretaceous, this 6-foot ichthyodectiform is most famous for the “fish-within-a-fish” skeleton, where it’s the vore victim of the much cooler Xiphactinus. God, this guy is lame. What a loser. What a pushover. Actually, you know what, I can relate to this guy. I’m also a loser pushover who likes the idea of getting vored… uh, ignore that last part, please.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 15 Oct 2024 - 22min - 259 - Udanoceratops, the Horned Face of Udan Sayr
(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Udanoceratops-pictures)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Laura Owsley discuss Udanoceratops, a fat ugly beast with a really big head. Between this, last week’s Anteosaurus, and the Eryopsepisode a bit ago, there seems to be a recurring theme of creatures here. See you at the Cotylorhynchusepisode where we start talking about small heads. From the Late Cretaceous, this 13-foot leptoceratopsian had a really big lower jaw and chin, kind of like a Chad, but far less handsome. This guy ain’t no himbo, more like an ogre or troll. Maybe I’m being too mean, though.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 08 Oct 2024 - 30min - 258 - Anteosaurus, the Lizard of the Mythical Giant Antaios
(image source: https://www.deviantart.com/willemsvdmerwe/art/Anteosaurus-340867141)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Anteosaurus, a really big stem mammal that ate and chomped and crawled and stomped all over. At least, I assume it did. We don’t really know, it could have moved exclusively via unicycle. From the Late Permian, this 20-foot dinocephalian was in the group of big terrestrial Permian predators before the gorgonopsids took over as the next big terrestrial Permian predators. But since this was all pre-dinosaur times, no one cares. Do you care? Of course you don’t care. I barely care and I produce this damn show.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 01 Oct 2024 - 21min - 257 - Dakotadon, the Tooth of the Dakota Region
(image source: https://prehistoria.fandom.com/es/wiki/Dakotadon)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Dakotadon, also known as the genus name that usurped the North American species of Iguanodonand thus any work featuring a North American Iguanodonretroactively is this. Hey, Aladar? You’re a Dakotadon now. Take all the time you need to process this, bro. From the Early Cretaceous, this 20-foot iguanodontid is one of those examples of the bones being discovered and named far before the species is officially described, meaning those paleontologists in the 1800s digging up this guy in South Dakota thought they were Iguanodonbut were this thing this whole time. If only they knew! Though frankly, I doubt they would care.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 24 Sep 2024 - 27min - 256 - Quinkana, the Spirit of Gugu-Yalanji Folklore
(image source: https://www.deviantart.com/fish98/art/Antipodes-Quinkana-Concept-969634441)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Quinkana, a galloping terrestrial crocodile from Australia, because why wouldn’t this be a thing? Especially on that continent, AKA Death World. From the Late Miocene to the Late Pleistocene, this 13-foot mekosuchine was also encountered by early humans, rather than being alongside the dinosaurs like it should have been. Why were you from then rather than from then? That’s a good sentence.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 17 Sep 2024 - 22min - 255 - Dusicyon, the Falkland Islands Wolf
(image source: https://theconversation.com/history-mystery-solved-the-origins-of-the-falkland-islands-wolf-12637)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Dusicyon, a wolf that encountered humans on its isolated island home and then got promptly killed off by the colonists… yeah, this is a sad episode. We try our best to lighten it up, but there’s only so much you can do! From the Early Holocene, this 5-foot canid as a genus lived all throughout South America, and the one we’re talking about for most of this episode is specifically the Falkland Islands version, Dusicyon australis, also called the Warrah. That’s neat. You know what’s not neat? This episode. Seriously, this was a mistake, y’all should listen to something else.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content atPatreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books athttps://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
Also special thanks to Catherine Ruža for her contributions to today's episode.
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Tue, 10 Sep 2024 - 27min - 254 - Gremlin, the Gremlin
(image source: https://www.sci.news/paleontology/gremlin-slobodorum-12547.html)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Laura Owsley discuss Gremlin, a monstrous little critter with a big head and a mischievous demeanor, particularly if you feed it after midnight. Come on, we all knew that’s where these jokes were heading, huh? We’re all on the same page? Good. From the Late Cretaceous, this 6-foot leptoceratopsid lived in both the wet scrublands of Alberta as well as in the insides or on the wings of planes back in the 40s and 50s… that one might be a deeper cut. Just watch the Twilight Zone episode, you’ve seen it. Or at least one of its many, many parodies.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. His latest book, Teslamancer, just released August 27th! And mild spoiler alert... there are kind of dinosaurs in it... mwuahahaha.
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Tue, 03 Sep 2024 - 24min - 253 - Eryops, the Drawn-Out Face
(image source: https://a-z-animals.com/animals/eryops/)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Eryops, a large amphibian with curved teeth, oval bumps, and a big head. Hey, Eryops, why the drawn-out face? Thank you, I’m here ‘til Tuesday. From the Early Permian, this 8-foot temnospondyl had the species name megacephalus, meaning this creature’s binomial name means “drawn-out face with a big head.” I really think they want us to know how big this thing’s head is, guys. What a thing to be famous for! Some can sing, some can dance, some have really, really big heads. We all work with our lot in life, whether it’s a lot or not.
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Tue, 27 Aug 2024 - 20min - 252 - Kaprosuchus, the Boar Crocodile
(image source: https://fossil.fandom.com/wiki/Kaprosuchus)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Spencer Mayhew discuss Kaprosuchus, a running crocodilian from Cretaceous Africa that lived alongside the far bigger crocodilian Sarcosuchus, the croc-like dinosaur Suchomimus, and the croc-jawed sail-backed dinosaur Spinosaurus. It’s like a who’s who of croc mimics, one of whom’s name literally means“crocodile mimic.” I guess it was trendy there. From the Mid Cretaceous, this 16-foot notosuchian was either semi-aquatic or fully terrestrial; paleontologists aren’t quite sure. Why are they not sure? What are we paying them to dig for? I tell you, I want my tax money spent more efficiently! Paleontologists are paid by the government, yes?
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Tue, 20 Aug 2024 - 23min - 251 - Camelops, the Camel Face
(image source: https://pixels.com/featured/camelops-hesternus-front-view-corey-ford.html)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Camelops, a… well, it’s a camel, guys. Yeah, news flash, Camelopsis a camel. God, we really need another dinosaur episode soon. From the Late Pleistocene, this 7-foot camel lived in North America and lived alongside elephants, lions, bison, and wolves. A whole lot of creatures you wouldn’t expect to find on this continent, yet here they were. And here was Camelops. Please still listen to this show, folks. We have so much left to talk about, I promise.
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Tue, 13 Aug 2024 - 25min - 250 - Oncorhynchus rastrosus, the Saber-toothed Salmon
(image source: https://eartharchives.org/articles/saber-toothed-salmon-teeth-more-like-tusks-than-fangs/)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Oncorhynchus rastrosus, AKA the saber-toothed salmon, AKA the coolest name for a fish ever, but FYI it’s not actually a valid descriptor anymore, so AKA it’s a massive disappointment. A big flop. Like a fish. Flop, flop. From the Late Miocene, this 8-foot salmonid was still pretty impressive, being such a big fish that also had big outward fangs, even if they weren’t saber-like canines. I just feel though that if you’re name is highlighting a certain feature, you better have it as advertised, otherwise I want my money back. You hear that, Oncorhynchus rastrosus? I want my money back! And don’t get it from a loan shark, I swear to God.
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Tue, 06 Aug 2024 - 19min - 249 - Macrauchenia, the Long Llama
(image source: Max Bellomio, @digital_duck on Twitter)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Macrauchenia, a big hoofed mammal that either had a trunk or didn’t, kind of like me when I travel or go to the pool. Either trunks or no trunks. It depends on how lazy I’m feeling. From the Pleistocene epoch, this 10-foot-tall litoptern ungulate was part of a group of mammals unique to South America that died out due to the Great American Interchange and the changing climate. Which means this one’s extinction had nothing to do with humans, so we can cross that one off the list at least. Guilt-free! Yay! Ugh…
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. Also, AI voices are used in the intro in all of this month's episodes.
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Tue, 30 Jul 2024 - 23min - 248 - Inostrancevia, of Alexander Inostrantsev
(image source: https://www.sci.news/paleontology/south-african-inostrancevia-11935.html)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Inostrancevia, potentially the largest of the gorgonopsids, which are a super-awesome group of creatures you should be ashamed you haven’t heard of before. Have you not heard of them before? Shame, shame! From the Late Permian, this 14-foot therapsid was the size of a bear, had saber-teeth, potentially fur, and lived millions of years before the first dinosaur ever took a dump upon the Earth, which is all quite remarkable. Can you tell how much I like these guys? I’m not biased, they’re just objectively awesome, and if you don’t like them, you’re wrong.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. Also, AI voices are used in the intro in all of this month's episodes.
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Tue, 23 Jul 2024 - 33min - 247 - Carcharodontosaurus, the Shark-Toothed Lizard
(image source: https://www.artstation.com/artwork/zDoGPq)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Carcharodontosaurus, a big super-predator that competed with a croc-jawed dino with a sail and a croc-jawed dino without. Oh, and also a big croc. Good ol’ carchar stood out by not following the croc trend! What a rebel. From the Mid Cretaceous, this 40-foot theropod was one of those unlucky dinosaurs that got blown up twice, once by whatever extinction did it in back in its day and once by a bunch of planes in a WW2 bombing run that took out its museum. Poor guy. The world doesn’t treat outliers fairly, I swear. Rebels are cool, guys! C’mon!
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. Also, AI voices are used in the intro in all of this month's episodes.
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Tue, 16 Jul 2024 - 26min - 246 - Panthera atrox, the American Lion
(image source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/American_lion)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Natasha Krech discuss Panthera atrox, which might also be Panthera leo atrox, making this an extinct subspecies rather than species. Which would be lame. I want differences in my prehistoric monsters! From the Pleistocene epoch, this 7-foot cat is perfectly themed for this great national holiday around this episode’s release… that holiday in question being Canada Day of course. These were in Canada too, so it fits with that important holiday I suppose. Can’t think of any other major holidays of note around this time.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. Also, AI voices are used in the intro in all of this month's episodes.
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Tue, 09 Jul 2024 - 25min - 245 - Erketu, of the Mongolian Shamanistic God
(image source: https://dinosaurpictures.org/Erketu-pictures)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lawrence Mack discuss Erketu, an obscure dinosaur named after a principle deity in Mongolian Shamanism, which means the jokes we make on this episode will surely send us straight to Mongolian hell. From the Late Cretaceous, this 50-foot macronarian sauropod had the longest neck relative to its body of any dinosaur, leading to the aforementioned terrible jokes you all expect us to make that are somehow worse this episode than ever. I hate our show’s reputation sometimes.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald. Also, AI voices are used in the intro in all of this month's episodes.
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Tue, 02 Jul 2024 - 23min - 244 - Leptictidium, the Graceful Weasel
(image source: https://walkingwith.fandom.com/wiki/Leptictidium)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Leptictidium, a cute little mammal trying to be a theropod dinosaur, a kangaroo, and a squirrel all in one. Don’t ever say this creature didn’t have goals. From the Early Eocene, this 3-foot leptictidan was part of a family that didn’t leave any descendents and died a terrible and lonely death. Or maybe a peaceful one surrounded by its friends and family. I dunno, I wasn’t there, so who can say?
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Tue, 25 Jun 2024 - 29min - 243 - Ichthyotitan, the Fish Titan
(image source: https://www.deviantart.com/inkabg2/art/Ichthyotitan-severnensis-1049125055)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Ichthyotitan, the recently discovered big boy of the early Mesozoic seas that is up there with the biggest boys of all time, along with Perucetusand the modern blue whale. These weren’t just boys. They were men. Whatever that means. Frick the patriarchy. From the Late Triassic, this 85-foot ichthyosaur was a voracious predator akin to an orca, meaning pretty much anything swimming about in this ocean was on the menu. Maybe every animal there should have just waddled onto land instead. Reenact the Devonian and crawl out of that dangerous sea. That’s what I would’ve done, because I’m a coward.
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Tue, 18 Jun 2024 - 23min - 242 - Baryonyx, the Heavy Claw
(image source: https://252mya.com/products/baryonyx-walkeri-stock-photo)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Baryonyx, a paramount piscivorous predator with crocodile-like jaws and two very big claws. Yeah, this show can be poetic sometimes. From the Early Cretaceous, this 28-foot spinosaurid theropod has had some high profile appearances in popular culture that have been quite controversial in the paleo community, such as in a famous blockbuster series where it had a few extra scutes and in an animated movie where it was Godzilla-sized and feared by T. rex. Guess which one of those the paleo nerds had more problems with? The former, obviously. Duh.
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Tue, 11 Jun 2024 - 26min - 241 - Martharaptor, the Thief of Martha Hayden
(image source: https://www.deviantart.com/cisiopurple/art/Martharaptor-760488972)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lawrence Mack discuss Martharaptor, a lovely creature with a pot belly and long fingernails, kind of like my great aunt Martha. She makes some great cookies, I gotta say. And brownies. Duuuude. From the Early Cretaceous, this 14-foot therizinosaurid was one of the earliest members of its family in North America and closely related to Nothronychus, another one of these dino buggers that most of y’all haven’t heard of. This show really is a relevant piece of media in today’s pop-culture landscape.
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Tue, 04 Jun 2024 - 25min - 240 - Lythronax, the Gore King
(image source: https://naturerules1.fandom.com/wiki/Lythronax)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Lythronax, a potential contender for one of the edgiest genus names of any dinosaur, right up there with Dynamoterrorand Atrociraptor. It’s not enough for these dinosaurs to be scary in appearance; their names have to sound scary too! Gore King! Aaagh! From the Late Cretaceous, this 25-foot tyrannosaurid’s biggest appearance in pop-culture is probably the Nintendo DS game Fossil Fighters, a Pokémon rip-off involving dinosaurs that’s not DInosaur King. Have you played it? It’s pretty good. I mean, I assume; I’ve never played it.
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Tue, 28 May 2024 - 26min - 239 - Dsungaripterus, the Wing of Junggar Basin
(image source: https://www.pteros.com/pterosaurs/dsungaripterus.html)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Dsungaripterus, a pterosaur that by God Almighty looks like a mouthful to pronounce. SUN-ga-RIP-turr-US. There, I just saved you a lot of time and energy. You’re welcome. From the Early Cretaceous, this 16-foot ornithocheiroid had a really rocking piece of headgear and a mouth that pointed upward, kind of like me when getting mead poured in my mouth by the tavern maids at the Renaissance Festival while in my wizard costume. Side question, have those festivals always been that horny, or did that just happen in the last couple of years? I should really stop by there more often.
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Tue, 21 May 2024 - 30min - 238 - Sarcosuchus, the Flesh Crocodile
(image source: https://dinopedia.fandom.com/wiki/Sarcosuchus)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Laura Owsley discuss Sarcosuchus, one of the biggest crocodilians in the fossil record that lived alongside some big hitters like Spinosaurus, Carcharodontosaurus, and Suchomimus. Oh, and also a giant sawshark. A truly terrifying swamp, that was. From the Mid Cretaceous, this 38-foot crocodylomorph ate any poor herbivorous dinosaurs that dared to trespass its swamp. Hey, Ouranosaurus, wanna cross the river? You gotta pay the toll… IN BLOOD. Nomnomnomnomnomnomnom.
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Tue, 14 May 2024 - 23min - 237 - Glacialisaurus, the Frozen Lizard
(image source: https://dinopedia.fandom.com/wiki/Glacialisaurus)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Lawrence Mack discuss Glacialisaurus, another dinosaur from Antarctica that lived alongside Cryolophosaurusand ate ferns and such. It’s a basic leaf-eating dinosaur, what more do you want from it? From the Early Jurassic, this 20-foot sauropodomorph lived millions of years before its hot and lush homeland became a frozen wasteland. How would you react if the land you lived in was only millions of years away from becoming a hellish landscape? Probably the same, honestly, seeing as the sun is gonna explode and Earth is gonna get scorched and entropy’s gonna tear apart protons and Hawking radiation is going to deteriorate black holes and the universe is going to be dead forever and… wait, we’re talking about some boring dinosaur, right? Where did my brain go? Existentialism…
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Tue, 07 May 2024 - 29min - 236 - Tyrannasorus rex, the Tyrannical Hump King
(image source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tyrannasorus_rex)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Allen Brooks discuss Tyrannasorus rex, a real PUNK’d of an animal by being just a plain-ass beetle named after the most fearsome dinosaur ever. Paleontologists have too much fun sometimes. Someone should rein them in. From the Miocene epoch, this 1-inch beetle was, well, a beetle. You ever seen a beetle? Then you’ve seen Tyrannasorus rex. They’re all the same. You don’t make up over half of all species in the biosphere of the planet by being distinctive.
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Tue, 30 Apr 2024 - 10min - 235 - Sauroposeidon, the Lizard of the Earthquake God
(image source: https://jurassicpark.fandom.com/wiki/Sauroposeidon)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Stephen Curro discuss Sauroposeidon, an abso-giganto-freaking-mongus dinosaur and the state dinosaur of Texas, because they like everything big down there. They ain't compensatin' for nuthin’, those durn cowboys. From the Early Cretaceous, this 70-foot macronarian sauropod lived alongside some heavy hitters like Acrocanthosaurus, Deinonychus, and Sauropelta, all of which we’ve covered on this show before, so they must be famous, right? Right? This show’s good exposure for these critters, I know it.
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Tue, 23 Apr 2024 - 26min - 234 - Fasolasuchus, the Crocodile of Tomas Fasola
(image source: https://www.nationalgeographic.com/science/article/triassic-bites-and-a-carnivore-conundrum)
Host Matthew Donald and guest co-host Ben O’Regan discuss Fasolasuchus, the biggest terrestrial non-dinosaur predator of all time. What a hyper-specific superlative. I bet I’m the biggest human named Matthew that wrote a dinosaur sci-fi series called Megazoic. Except probably not, there’s a lot of Matthews out there. From the Mid Triassic, this 35-foot rauisuchian got a big bit of cinema exposure as the climactic boss fight in the recent Adam Driver movie where he’s an alien who fights dinosaurs, which sounds like the most awesome movie ever, but alas, ‘twas mid at best. No shame if you liked it, though.
Want to further support the show? Sign up to our Patreon for exclusive bonus content at Patreon.com/MatthewDonald. Also, you can get links to follow Matthew Donald and purchase his books at https://linktr.ee/matthewdonald.
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Tue, 16 Apr 2024 - 23min
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