Podcasts by Category
Join the UK's youngest and most relevant broadcasters Elis James and John Robins for your twice-weekly dose of big laughs and top quality #content. Hilarious, welcoming and unashamedly ashamed, let these two best friends keep you company every Tuesday and Friday.
Email: elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk WhatsApp: 07974293022 #elisandjohn
- 363 - #327 - Tim’s Rumpus Room, Pork Chop Calves and Buckinghamshire Living
If you thought this show was your safe space away from pop behemoth Taylor Swift’s single handed takeover of popular culture then sadly you’d be wrong. For it’s Swiftmas Day (well if you view this in a linear fashion rather than circular) and John’s neck deep in it.
Also the reverberations of Elis stepping on John’s turf continue to ripple through gains space and time, whilst the question of pâté comes under the spotlight.
If you’ve got any crucial information that simply must see the light of day then to get in touch it’s elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk or WhatsApp on 07974 293 022
Tue, 23 Apr 2024 - 362 - #326 - Chiles Parsnips, Elis St. John, and Superfruit Cigs
What do the blue touch paper and the switchboards have in common? They’ve both been lit, that’s what. Elis and John have been inundated with some of our greatest set of emails EVER! And in that the models flow in like it's fashion week; from snacks to footwear, from 1940s yearning women to teenage graffitiing delinquents. This episode has them all.
Elsewhere, things get racy, Elis’s newfound gym buff status comes under heavy fire, and John is rocked to his very core by some news at Junction 16 on the M4.
If you want to get in touch with the show then email elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk or WhatsApp on 07974 293 022
Fri, 19 Apr 2024 - 361 - #325 - Taut John, Cake In Your Wallet and Joanne McNally
Once the Welsh football media spring dries up Elis needs a retirement plan. Thanks to his dashing good looks there is only one viable alternative: international modelling. The boys thus get the lowdown on all things posing from the most handsome man they've ever chatted to.
We also play a Made Up Game where Elis is restricted to levels previously unexperienced and we've got two of the masters of tasks in the studio today.
If you want to get in touch with the show then here's how: elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk or WhatsApp on 07974 293 022
Tue, 16 Apr 2024 - 360 - #324 - Blancmange Bullying, The Custard Slice Scene, and Run to Win and Hate Yourself
If this show doesn’t become the go-to running podcast of 2024, we’re not sure what will. For all the on-foot 'experts' pumping out mid-level content NONE of them will cover big bones, being overtaken by your mum or exercising your big toes.
But fear not, it’s not all the 'Pounding the P-odcast'. Elis takes to the metaphorical Mastermind chair in a grilling that he was born to do and the boys finally speak to a mythical figure.
If you want to get in touch with the show then email elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk or WhatsApp on 07974 293 022
Fri, 12 Apr 2024 - 359 - #323 - Fleet McWrap, Handsome Turf and George Kink Lads Only
Tuesdays used to mean the odd Champions League fixture and Holby City. Now they mean podcasts. More specifically this one, and on today's show a giddiness has descended on the studio. The boys are dreaming of things they could do and places they could go for the show: Barbados, a trip to Europe's largest folk museum, or "wearing unitards and beating each other up" are all equally exciting and viable options.
Elsewhere there's a sexy Shame and we may even get a sequel to "It Floats Ladies".
If you want to get in touch with the show then email elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk or WhatsApp on 07974 293 022
Tue, 09 Apr 2024 - 358 - #27 - Coins, New Kids On The Block and Al Murray’s Sausage Roll
Take a tired Elis James, add an ill John Robins, and weirdly, you get a blummin' great show. Expect S of the P stuff, along with all the usual features including Shame Well, a belting Made Up Game and a fascinating Unsung Hero. Enjoy! #content.
Hilarious, warm and unashamedly ashamed, their award-winning chemistry will get you over the finish line of the working week.
Email: elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk #elisandjohn
Fri, 29 Nov 2019 - 357 - #26 - Alignment Meetings, The Golden Age of Welsh Football and StormzyFri, 22 Nov 2019
- 356 - #25 - Boozy Cruisey, Carbon Neutral Mind Holidays and the Art of the Pre-RecordFri, 15 Nov 2019
- 355 - #24 - Colons, Boilers and the North South DivideFri, 08 Nov 2019
- 354 - #23 - Loose and Live from Tobacco DockFri, 01 Nov 2019
- 353 - Bonus #content: How Do You Cope? Trailer
Available now on BBC Sounds, a brand new podcast with Elis and John called How Do You Cope? Episode 1 is with former doctor turned stand-up Adam Kay about the stress and how he coped as a junior doctor in the NHS. Search for “How Do You Cope?” on BBC Sounds, or visit bbc.co.uk/cope for more information on the series.
Thu, 31 Oct 2019 - 352 - #22 - White lies, Bum Cameras and BowieFri, 25 Oct 2019
- 351 - #21 - Lad Whispering, Corporates and Fun On The ToiletFri, 18 Oct 2019
- 350 - #20 - Josh Widdicombe, Boozy Birthdays and The WAFTAs
If you've always wanted to hear friend-of-the-show Josh Widdicombe discuss the existence of a lesser-spotted food item in Pret's airport outlets, then this is the podcast episode you've been waiting for. There's also the usual fun with Made Up Games, Shame Well and The Weirdness Amnesty. Enjoy!
Email: elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk #elisandjohn
Fri, 11 Oct 2019 - 349 - #19 - Party Bags, Hurdy Gurdies and Edible Christmas TreesFri, 04 Oct 2019
- 348 - #18 - Funeral Levity, Kermode's TV and Kit ChatFri, 27 Sep 2019
- 347 - #17 - Petty Put-Offs, Football Debuts and Waving Cat EmojisFri, 20 Sep 2019
- 346 - #16 - Good Deeds Gone Wrong, Mayo's Eyelashes, and Unsung HeroesFri, 13 Sep 2019
- 345 - #15 - Nude Timber Magnates, Kermode-gate, and Too Many NigelsFri, 06 Sep 2019
- 344 - #14 - Webcam Shame Well, Shower Technique and Angry DadsFri, 30 Aug 2019
- 343 - #13 - Live From Edinburgh with Lou Sanders, Ivo Graham and Sunil Patel
It’s the fourth and final week at the Edinburgh Festival for Elis James and John Robins, and they’re going out with a guest-filled bang! Lou Sanders, Ivo Graham and Sunil Patel create an anarchic 'last day at school' vibe, whilst the boys also ask 'When did you get it wrong with your hero'. It’s a busy one, so please do listen responsibly.
Email: elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk
Fri, 23 Aug 2019 - 342 - #12 - Live from Edinburgh with Ed Gamble and David O’Doherty
It’s show three of four for Elis and John live from the Edinburgh Festival, and this week - along with guests Ed Gamble and David O’Doherty - there was a cringeworthy Scottish Shame Well, an unexpected victory in Made Up Games, and a lot of talk about odd things you find in a new home. Enjoy!
Email: elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk #elisandjohn
Fri, 16 Aug 2019 - 341 - #11 - Live from Edinburgh with Sarah Kendall and Suzi RuffellFri, 09 Aug 2019
- 340 - #10 - Live from Edinburgh with Matt Forde and Al Murray
Elis James and John Robins come to you live from The Edinburgh Fringe Festival, and are joined by mates Matt Forde and Al Murray.
Away from the wonderful guests, John reveals his encyclopaedic knowledge of Chris de Burgh, the team rue their curry choices from the night before, and we all enjoy a Made Up Game all about balls. Enjoy!
Fri, 02 Aug 2019 - 339 - #9 - Soil Shame, Sweary Golf, and John's £40k MarathonFri, 26 Jul 2019
- 338 - #8 - The Pub (Bonus #Content)Fri, 19 Jul 2019
- 337 - #7 - John's House (Bonus #Content)Fri, 12 Jul 2019
- 336 - #6 - Elis's House (Bonus #Content)Fri, 05 Jul 2019
- 335 - #5 - Dishwashers, Tipsy Cricket and Ol' Johnny Three Hours EarlyFri, 28 Jun 2019
- 334 - #4 - Dad Breaks, Sex Shame and Insta-ClonesFri, 21 Jun 2019
- 333 - #3 - Todgers, The Fairness Desk and Clicking VAT ManFri, 14 Jun 2019
- 332 - #2 - Knackerwatch, Valley Vespas and Listener RemunerationFri, 07 Jun 2019
- 331 - #1 - Mega Mouse, Project Youth and Captain Beefheart in the NudeFri, 31 May 2019
- 330 - An Audible Hors d'oeuvreFri, 24 May 2019
- 329 - #322 - Specs Appeal, Virgil van Dave, and Toilets At Dench
A new John Robins has emerged. Move over Brains and Colin Firth in 'A Single Man' for there's a new doyenne of eyewear fashion. And with such style and grace he's also become a fount of knowledge on how best to wear one's specs. And Robins isn't the only podcast host dipping his toes into the haute couture world, as Elis is spotted modelling in the city of lights, Paris.
The boys muse on names that could work as service stations, and there’s a humdinger of a listener anecdote from one of the North West's premier late-2000s leisure centres.
If you want to get in touch with the show then email elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk or WhatsApp on 07974 293 022
Fri, 05 Apr 2024 - 328 - #321 - Psychic Cats, Second Rate Roses and Out of Riff Ammo
The lovely Lou Sanders is in the studio and brings along her wonderfully chaotic aura.
Oh and it's dead bus-eh. There's another hands on Made Up Game, Lou's not getting any traction on her socials and a caller deals out not just one but TWO harrowing stories.
If you want to get in touch with the show about anything whatsoever then email elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk or WhatsApp on 07974 293 022
Tue, 02 Apr 2024 - 327 - #320 - The Testosterone Twins, Three Shirt Robins and Restless Irritable Discontented
It’s a two hander today as John and Dave fly solo. But that isn’t to say that we’re not bursting at the seams with top stuff.
There’s more cloud developments, John reflects on sobriety nearly a year on from his How Do You Cope chat with Elis, and the brief to wish 5 Live a Happy Birthday is broadly fulfilled.
It’s elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk or WhatsApp on 07974 293 022 for all your bits.
Fri, 29 Mar 2024 - 326 - #319 - Baddies on the Beach, 5 Live At 30 and Thank God for Zabaleta
5 Live is 30 Years Old. A milestone indeed but it makes the station even more criminally young than our presenters. So Elis and John celebrate by looking back at the history of the UK's favourite (and potentially only) dedicated news and sport station.
We also chat to an adamantly Dave-shunning David, and John, much to everyone's shock, pokes holes in a Made Up Game... which was created by an 11-year-old.
If you want to get in touch with the show about anything whatsoever then email elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk or WhatsApp on 07974 293 022
Tue, 26 Mar 2024 - 325 - #318 - Chieveley James, Project Digital Life and The More The Murrayer
John Robins is an analogue guy. There's no one on earth whose life is more dictated by paper than he. So today John digs into his worst nightmare: 'the cloud'.
The boys also hear from a listener who had a podcast-adjacent brush with death and there's more sausage while you wait chat.
If you want to get in touch with the show then email elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk or WhatsApp on 07974 293 022
Fri, 22 Mar 2024 - 324 - #317 - Tasting Collapse, Ken Coe and James Hoffmann
Never has the mood at Elis and John HQ been more nervous or excitable. For it is a momentous day. The Hoff himself, coffee expert and YouTuber James Hoffman, is on the show. And the boys have as many questions as there are beans in the world.
And more importantly we'll find out, under Espresso making levels of pressure, who definitively makes the best coffee as judged by the coffee king him sen.
If you want to get in touch with the show then email elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk or WhatsApp on 07974 293 022
Tue, 19 Mar 2024 - 323 - #316 - Terrace Fashion Week, Too Much Pastry and Stopping At Heston
Have you ever wondered how our hosts would fare as children’s podcast presenters? Well thanks to today’s fun and games, now we know! And it’s as fascinating as you’d imagine.
Elsewhere, Producer Dave tries to single-handedly bring down the state secondary school education system, and in what is surely a digital first, the team discuss which celebrities look the cleanest.
Fri, 15 Mar 2024 - 322 - #315 - The Tap Scene, Spanish Deception and Cheaper Derby
We’re a month into the Great Reset and Elis and John are so into the swing of things that they’re practically Tarzan and Jane swinging through the Digital Jungle. John is Tarzan due to his ripped physique and long arms suitable for vine grabbing. Elis is Jane due to his dainty disposition and ability to flutter his eyelashes.
And the boys’ suitably good form provides a backdrop to a (quite literally) dream game, a wild inductee to the 80 Daves pantheon and the thoughts of being lowered six feet under to daytime TV themes.
Tue, 12 Mar 2024 - 321 - #314 - King Kia, Three Course Curry and Cow Pat PR
Today Elis and John are at one with nature. (No, not in a sexy way Producer Dave). They're surviving not only the rigours of a podcast-first approach but today are prepared for much more. The smoke signals are going up. The salmon ponassed. All are braced in the bivouac for a very special surprise.
Once we've left the wilderness behind, Elis gets a right rollocking over his distaste of a high camp staple, we get an incredible insight into the diet of a mid-tier Crossfitter and we bid adieu to a key crew member of the good ship Elis and John.
Fri, 08 Mar 2024 - 320 - #313 - Weaving Willow, Vague Cawl and Soft Play VAR
Elis James and John Robins are two of the UK's youngest and most talented broadcasters, and over the years they've had many of their skills put to the test, including and not limited to: what to do in the event of breaking news, how to react if a fellow presenter drops an accidental double entendre on-air, and who to turn to if you read out a comical fake name for the whole country to hear. But there's one vitally important skill that has yet to be tested... That is, until this very podcast. What you are about to hear is Elis and John being pushed to the limits in one of the most difficult tasks known to man, and it formed the basis of a Made Up Game. Make sure to fasten you audio seatbelts!
Elsewhere, the guys moan about coats that don't have hanging loops, John shares an anecdote about saving an item from recycling, Elis talks about what it's like to not be recognised on the red carpet, and a listener sends in one of the greatest jingles of all time.
To get in touch, send an email to elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk.
Tue, 05 Mar 2024 - 319 - #312 - Swansea Spielberg, Mooning Armada and a Stain on Global Culture
According to the Full Moon Calendar, we're still three weeks away from the next biggest moony of them all: the moon. However, that didn't stop Elis and John from getting teary eyed at the glories of mooning past and the relative dearth of mooning present. It was an intensely valuable chat charting modern British social history, and one you certainly won't want to miss.
Elsewhere, the boys also hear of Winkler on the Otley Run, there's some belting new listener jingles and the idea of 'Elis and John: The Musical' is floated.
Fri, 01 Mar 2024 - 318 - #311 - Bonce Funk, Improving Esperanto and The Audio Foyer
There's an old saying in the English language: 'A watched pot never boils'. But thankfully, the same doesn't apply to other forms of technology, because a watched smart speaker DOES boil out content, to the tune of twice-weekly podcasts featuring the two of the UK's finest broadcasters, Elis James and John Robins. So grab a seat, reach for your favourite mug, and prepare for it to be filled to the brim with boiling hot chat.
In this episode John crumbles during a Made Up Game, there's an all-time great Shame Well, Producer Dave shows off his TV presenting skills (think Kerry from Succession), and we hear your Celebrity Slams.
Tue, 27 Feb 2024 - 317 - #310 - Didgeridinners, Our Oprah and Telford Is A Tear Duct
An alien lands on Earth. As an audiophile, the first thing they do when they touch down is press play on the Elis and John podcast to get a taste of the planet's podcasting output. Instantly, they realise that Earth is the place to be, as their ear nubs are thrilled by pulse-setting topics such as Dronfield and the tip. They feel... home.
In other content the boys chat to an insider on the frontline of the Chesterfield Conundrum, John experiences a Damascene moment whilst watching telly and there's salivation at the prospect of Chiles on the decks.
Fri, 23 Feb 2024 - 316 - #309 - Condo Cheese, Stepdad Energy and Psychic Hangovers
Still aching after their Digital Decade celebrations, Elis and John somehow managed to find the strength to dust themselves off and begin traipsing along the long road towards their 20 year broadcasting milestone. Who knows what lies ahead for them, but you can bet that there's going to be plenty of fun along the way (as well as the distinct possibility that Elis retires on a super yacht thanks to his multi-billion pound net worth).
In this week's episode there's a Made Up Game that takes the boys back to their school days, a listener all the way from AMERICA calls in, wheelie bins are debated in Petty Parliament, and once again there's a thorough discussion about things from the past. Enjoy!
To get in touch, send an email to elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk.
Tue, 20 Feb 2024 - 315 - #308 - The Double Ds, O'Doherty Ditties and A Lesson In Jingles
As the sun sets on a digitised decade of content for Messrs James and Robins, it was only fitting to celebrate 10 years of broadcasting badinage with a little bit of retrospective reflection.
Amongst the fun, a very special surprise guest pops by, a whole host of friendly voices pop up to pass on their best wishes, plus the show’s decade-long theme of Shame is finally put to superb use in the classroom.
Thanks for listening. Here’s to 10 More Years!
Fri, 16 Feb 2024 - 314 - #307 - Pleasure Parity, Content Camaraderie and A Thumbless Month
Tuesday: in the past it was often looked at as one of the less-favourable days of the week. The weekend feels miles away, you're still not even half way through the working week... not ideal. However, since Elis James and John Robins started releasing two episodes a week Tuesdays have gone through something of a rebrand. Tuesdays are now COOL! They're a day to look forward to. If anything, you could say that Tuesday is the new Friday (in that it's a day when a new episode of the podcast is released). Basically, what we're trying to say is that Tuesdays are great because you get to enjoy another dose of Elis, John and Producer Dave.
In this episode we hear one of the all-time great Shame Well stories that's been added into the hall of fame, John shares an injury he picked up whilst racing against someone in fancy dress, Elis imagines what it would be like to score a goal for Swansea City, and everyone gets a bit jealous of this week's guest in "Around The World in 80 Daves".
To get in touch, send an email to elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk.
Tue, 13 Feb 2024 - 313 - #306 - The Banter Box, Six Feet From Stardom and Where's Lincoln?
The content machine is now well and truly oiled up and ploughing ahead at lightning speed, as Elis James and John Robins release their SECOND podcast of the week! If the prospect of two podcasts a week is daunting to you fear not: the beauty of podcasts means you're able to listen whenever you like; be that on a train, in a car, or in a sauna with a bunch of your best pals. "Someone pass me a cold towel, this banter is steaming hot!" one might shout (in a sauna, not on a train).
In what some are called a more "relaxed" episode, this time round the guys discussed more things that you think are "cool", a listener from Switzerland gets in touch, and the question is raised about whether Chesterfield is in the north or south of the UK.
To get in touch, email elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk
Fri, 09 Feb 2024 - 312 - #305 - Anxious Orange, Alpha Max Force and A Tartt Tip-Off
Tuesday 6th February 2024: a day that will go down in history as the day that broadcasting changed forever. Was it because we saw the launch of a brand new digital radio station that solely broadcasts the sound of the M6 motorway? Not yet; but give it time. No, the date in question is so significant because it saw the UK’s youngest radio presenters being transformed into the UK’s youngest podcasters. That’s right: the brand new Elis James and John Robins podcast is finally here; and it's double the content, double the satisfaction (if focus groups are to be believed).
To kick off the new-look show the guys launch two BRAND NEW features, Elis shares an anecdote about ravers from Suffolk, a very special guest drops by, and Producer Dave treats us all to a celebratory poem. Boy it’s good to be back.
To get in touch, send an email to elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk.
Tue, 06 Feb 2024 - 311 - The Great Reset: 'Broadcasting Britain Back Better'
The launch of the brand new Elis James and John Robins podcast is days away, and as the finishing touches are being added attention turns to how the boys can maximise audience growth.
Elis and John are back BIGGER AND BETTER from 6th February, with red hot content now released on Tuesday AND Friday every week; returning with groundbreaking features, scintillating chat and anecdotal gold that'll blow your BBC Sounds sock off.
You'll also be able to relive the fun on 5 Live on Fridays afternoons from 1pm.
To get in touch, email elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk
Fri, 02 Feb 2024 - 310 - The Great Reset: 'Igniting the Spark'
Elis, John and Producer Dave are busy working on the relaunch of their brand new podcast, but with the launch date fast approaching they've decided to turn to one of the most celebrated creatives of their generation for advice.
Elis and John are back BIGGER AND BETTER from 6th February, with red hot content now released on Tuesday AND Friday every week; returning with groundbreaking features, scintillating chat and anecdotal gold that'll blow your BBC Sounds sock off.
You'll also be able to relive the fun on 5 Live on Fridays afternoons from 1pm.
To get in touch, email to elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk.
Tue, 30 Jan 2024 - 309 - The Great Reset: 'A Digital Empire'
Preparations for the brand new Elis James and John Robins podcast are well under way, and the guys are now turning their attention to one of the most important aspects of the show: #content.
Elis and John are back BIGGER AND BETTER from 6th February, with red hot content now released on Tuesday AND Friday every week; returning with groundbreaking features, scintillating chat and anecdotal gold that'll blow your BBC Sounds sock off.
You'll also be able to relive the fun on 5 Live on Fridays afternoons from 1pm.
To get in touch, email elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk.
Fri, 26 Jan 2024 - 308 - The Great Reset: 'Let's Kick This Show Off the Road'
With the launch of their brand new podcast fast approaching, Elis, John and Producer Dave have decided to meet up at the BBC to begin planning. There's plenty to discuss, but things are already off to a shaky start.
Elis and John are back BIGGER AND BETTER from 6th February, with red hot content now released on Tuesday AND Friday every week; returning with groundbreaking features, scintillating chat and anecdotal gold that'll blow your BBC Sounds sock off.
You'll also be able to relive the fun on 5 Live on Fridays afternoons from 1pm.
To get in touch, email elisandjohn@bbc.co.uk
Tue, 23 Jan 2024 - 307 - #304 - Elis James and John Robins: The Best of 2023
Bob Marley once sang "In this bright future you can't forget your past", and it's those very words that have once again inspired Elis James and John Robins to look back at another 12 months of world class #content. Whether it be sexy tax calendars, riffs about the weather, or discussing Producer Dave's vasectomy, there's been something for everyone this year, and this is your chance to join us for our end of year celebration.
2024 might see the guys waving goodbye to their live radio show, but it's good news for you the listener, as you'll soon be getting DOUBLE Elis and John.
Fri, 29 Dec 2023 - 306 - #303 - Robbyns Resolutions, Secret Scents and Chaff Tuesday
Christmas is just around the corner, and whilst many people up and down the country are winding down for the festive period here on the Elis James and John Robins show we’re turbocharging our ideas machine as we continue our march towards the ultimate destination: BBC Sounds. Does what you’ve just read make sense? Not necessarily, but all you need to understand is that after a short break in January Elis and John will be back bigger and better than ever. Before then, however, we just have the small task of getting YOU ready for a fully festive weekend (it’s the Producer Dave dream).
This week’s show was nothing short of extraordinary. Not only did we hear the last ever episode of DI Robbyns, we also had a live performance of the greatest theme tune of all time, a rundown of all the stats behind the Made Up Games played since May 2019, and a DJ LEGEND joined us for a Petty Parliament.
Have a wonderful Christmas, and we’ll see you very soon.
Fri, 22 Dec 2023 - 305 - #302 - Sounds & Sons, David D. Craddock and Two Sides of the Groin
Elis, John and Producer Dave embodied the very definition of 'the voice of the UK' for today's show, as they once again broadcast from locations that were literally hundreds of miles apart. How was that possible? Well, thanks to a little piece of magic we in the biz like to call "technology". As always, the guys didn't let distance get in the way of a good time, and if anything being a safe distance from each other merely added to the giddiness; making Producer Dave turn grey on no less than five occasions.
John debates whether he should be tipping his refuse collectors, Elis discusses his undercarriage cleaning technique, Producer Dave attempts to explain exactly what's happening to the show in 2024, and a surprise phone call casts the future of one of our favourite features into doubt.
Fri, 15 Dec 2023 - 304 - #301 - Going Grain, Hannon Handshakes and Peak Bleak
With the end of the year fast approaching the hot topic on everyone's lips is forgiveness. Whether it be the person that accidentally spilled a can of lager all over your laptop, or the football player that scored the goal that relegated your favourite team, it's time for those feelings of negativity from the past year to be let go. However, some beefs stretch back further than 12 months... some even more than 12 years. Yes, on this week's show John Robins sought to end a two decade-long beef that he's had against one-time Queen-disliker Neil Hannon, lead singer of The Divine Comedy. Would Elis and Producer Dave be able to keep the studio calm enough for a civil discussion to take place? Well, why not jump into today's podcast to find out.
As well as all the usual fun, Tony Livesey revealed a missed career opportunity, there's a Made Up Game that the guys performed surprisingly well in, John told us about his fun New Years Eve plans and Elis decided to share his much-anticipated review of John's recent stand up show.
Fri, 08 Dec 2023 - 303 - #300 - Digital Decades, Comedic Offbeatsman and Basic Podcast Strategy
Back in May 2019 who would have thought that Elis James and John Robins, battered and bruised by a barrage of texts and tweets bemoaning their recent appointment at 5 Live, would eventually go on to reach episode 300 of their show, all whilst capturing the hearts and minds of radio listeners up and down the country? The correct answer is that nobody thought it would have been possible, and if you’d have seen the text console on that day you’d be forgiven for thinking they wouldn’t last three shows, let alone 300. Yet here they stand today, hand in hand, triumphantly towering over the UK radio landscape they have so valiantly conquered and made their own. BBC Radio Elis and John? Yeah, that’s probably not too far off either.
As today was such a big occasion, we thought it only right to celebrate appropriately. John yawned on air three times, Elis complained about having a headache, Producer Dave shared a Made Up Game involving the weight of dishwasher tablets, and a huge announcement got potentially hampered due to some top quality riffing.
Fri, 01 Dec 2023 - 302 - #299 - Pylon Following, 50 Under 50 and Lou’s Big Birthday
Due to factors there was no live show today, but that doesn’t mean we were ever going to leave you high and dry without your weekly dose of content. No, we’ve proven time and time again that nothing can stop us from #creating #content, so strap yourself in for a fast and loose podcast-only version of the Elis James and John Robins show, with special guest presenter (and birthday girl) Lou Sanders!
It was an action packed outing today, with plenty of fun for everyone. There’s another edition of John’s Motorway Musings, Lou shares a BRAND NEW jingle that she’s created, Producer Dave describes his favourite type of music and an age-old question about escalators is answered.
Fri, 24 Nov 2023 - 301 - #298 - Tahini Trouble, Jivo Graham and Ruddy Angry
John Robins - the most dedicated comedian in the UK - is continuing his mammoth UK tour, which means that he wasn’t able to make it into the studio for this week’s show. Thankfully for you the you the listener, that meant it was a rollover week. The top prize on offer? That’s right, Ivo Graham! So grab your tickets, check your numbers, and get ready to be made a #content millionaire.
It was a show jam packed with everything you’d ever want from two hours of broadcasting. There was a Made Up Game that tested the guys’ creativity (and Tony Livesey’s patience), Elis gave some potentially inaccurate advice about the process of ripening fruit, Ivo taught us about what’s coming up in the big-hitting locations of Coventry and Liverpool, and Producer Dave got his heart broken during a scripted intro.
Fri, 17 Nov 2023 - 300 - #297 - Sexy Snails, Retired Waistcoats and Ice Cream Calamity
Like the very concept of time itself John’s tour continues to march forward at pace, as he aims to visit every stand-up comedy venue in the country. That meant that Elis and Producer Dave were one man short in the studio, but thankfully the big wigs at 5 Live had a more than capable replacement waiting in the wings. Step forward everyone’s favourite son of Swindon... Ivo Graham!
Today’s show was packed to the rafters with classic content. Ivo debuted a brand new feature, we heard another edition of John’s Motorway Musings, Producer Dave - one again - was getting ready for the weekend, and Elis got confused by a Made Up Game that eventually went on to become an 8/10 classic. Enjoy!
Fri, 10 Nov 2023 - 299 - #296 - PDF Radio, Tourbasco and A Bag of Prawns
CAT FEVER struck the studio today; quite literally, as it turns out that Elis James is allergic to the two little kittens that he's welcomed into his life. John's envy was palpable, but does that mean he's going to be introducing some feline friends into his homestead? That's yet to be decided, but given how excited he was about Elis's cat news we wouldn't be surprised if two more cats joined Yaya, Kolo, Cleo and Uncle Todd in the 5 Live cat gang very soon.
Elsewhere on the show, John helps out some of our younger listeners in Ask John, Elis discusses entering the 44th year of his life, Producer Dave learns about a radio comedy-drama that's based on his life, and there's a Made Up Game that can only be described as "clunky yet fun".
Fri, 03 Nov 2023 - 298 - #295 - Badmin, Comedy Tapas and Making Uncertain Memories
It’s been some year for Elis James, and nobody deserves a break more than him (though John might argue the case against that claim). Yes, this week he decided to treat his family to a well-deserved getaway on the continent… the only problem being that he forgot to make anyone involved with the show aware of this until about five days ago. Thankfully, it takes a lot more than a presenter going AWOL to make us lose our heads, and within mere hours we had a special guest lined up capable of filling anyone's shoes. That’s right, joining us for the show this week was friend of the show and comedian extraordinaire Ania Magliano!
Fri, 27 Oct 2023 - 297 - #294 - Derbyshire Disrespect, Fruity Boy & Veg Head and Vibing On Ice
John - similar to a comedy version of The Rolling Stones - just doesn't want to stop touring, meaning that for the second week on the bounce he wasn't around for the show. So, with an empty seat next to Elis we needed someone who'd be able to carry the show with a sense of responsibility... a sense of hubris... dare we say a sense of fun? Well, obviously there was only one person for the job: your friend and mine, Lou Sanders! And like a defensive midfielder being brought onto the pitch during injury time she calmed everyone down, took control of the situation and saw out the game.
It was a very fun show today; Elis gives a BAFTA worthy performance in DI Robbyns, Lou shares some MASSIVE news (that's actually already out there), Producer Dave gets excited about a Ricky Hatton anecdote and a brand new produce-based radio duo is born!
And remember, listener: "Today's radio will eventually become a podcast at some point."
Fri, 20 Oct 2023 - 296 - #293 - The Darkness of Dave, Hoi Polloi and Jacqueline Wilson (A)
Listener: this is both an apology AND a warning. An apology for being naive enough to think that someone might like to share a harmless anecdote about directing footballing icon Pele to a toilet with the nation... and a warning to anyone who thinks that using a joke name is an easy and amusing way of throwing Elis James off his stride.
You just thank your lucky stars that radio hardman John Robins wasn't in the studio to deal with you, and instead the gentle giant Ivo Graham was playing the role of co-host. It's a good job he and Elis are fleet-footed broadcasters, because it would take more than a practical joke to make them flounder (perhaps something like asking them to do an Irish accent on the fly would do the trick).
Now that's out the way, today's show was a thoroughly enjoyable affair! Ivo used his huge brain to solve some listener problems in 'Ask Ivo', we heard some more listener renditions of the DI Robbyns theme tune, and dare we say we heard the most dramatic ending to a Made Up Game of all time. You won't want to miss it.
Fri, 13 Oct 2023 - 295 - #292 - Smelting Success, Powerful Honey and The Arena of Worry
Like The Beatles, The Rolling Stones and Roachford before him, John continues to live the touring life; aiming to perform stand up at every location in the UK with a population of over 3000. And whilst this ambitious task is cheered on by Elis and Producer Dave, it does make broadcasting live radio slightly more difficult, so once again this week's show is a special pre-recorded affair. Double the fun, triple the content, quadruple the time to edit!
The guys celebrate a recent award win, Elis talks about his tired eyes, John performs an uncanny Tim Buckley impression, and Producer Dave oversees one of the greatest Made Up Games of all time.
Fri, 06 Oct 2023 - 294 - #291 - Mancunian Positive John (Bonus #Content)
Ryder Cup action is taking over BBC 5 Live, meaning there was no live show from Elis James and John Robins this week... But fear not, as we have a right treat in store for you.
You've heard 'Desert Islands Discs'... You've enjoyed the audio soundscape that is 'The Archers'... But in this special bonus podcast you're about to hear something that nobody has ever dared to attempt due to the sheer level of broadcasting prowess required to pull it off. That's right, prepare to experience one presenter doing an impression of all four members of The Beatles whilst another presenter hand grinds their own coffee beans. Enjoy!
Fri, 29 Sep 2023 - 293 - #290 - Giftshop Gripes, D-Reamits and We Go To Tunbridge Wells
With John embarking on a 200+ date world tour taking in Salford, Canterbury, Huddersfield, and then Salford again, the man whose modus operandi is emotionally hefty comedy requires a mental break every so often. However, not one to let the listener miss out on their weekly dose of #content he insisted on making Elis and Producer Dave join him to pre-record a show. If there's one thing he ain't, it's dedicated!
As well as all the usual fun, Elis gets vocal in his sleep and channels the 'Voice of the Balls', and John cuts through the noise on the failures of parenting.
Fri, 22 Sep 2023 - 292 - #289 - Primary Porkies, Theatre Thickos and Fun In The Fens
Look up the word 'content' in the Oxford English Dictionary and it reads "n. Elis James and John Robins' show on BBC Radio 5 Live, 2-4pm 15th September 2023". For what a busy week it's been for Messrs James and Robins!
Elis both continues his quest to become Carmarthenshire's most cultured man AND finds time to grace several Baltic states, whilst John has played Norwich's smallest venue not once but twice(!).
We are also graced with a truly classic(al) theme tune, a 24 karat gold stick it on the mantelpiece Shame Well and some city-sized news from Dave.
Fri, 15 Sep 2023 - 291 - #288 - Auction Action, DI Dre and Thought Knox
For the first time in what’s felt like years Elis, John and Producer Dave were finally reunited in Central London this week, and just like any other family reunion a wide range of emotions were experienced during the show: excitement (from John checking on the Freddie Mercury auction), frustration (from Producer Dave, because John kept checking on the Freddie Mercury auction), and love (from Elis, amazed at John’s dedication to checking in on the Freddie Mercury auction).
Away from all the Queen chat, Robbie Knox - the brand new landlord of The Moon Under Water - stopped by to say hello before submitting a law into the Petty Parliament, a DI Robbyns cover to rival Goldie Lookin' Chain was sent in by a listener, Producer Dave shared his drumming ambitions and the BBC canteen benefitted from a massive cake order (eventually).
Fri, 08 Sep 2023 - 290 - #287 - Memoirhahas, Cat Flap Chaos and Tessellation Turmoil
After a month long loan deal expired, Edinburgh returned John Robins. So Robins, free from the Scottish capital's creative buzz and extortionate rental prices returned to the studio... to broadcast to Britain and the world. But today he was not with his companion of norm.
With Elis away on a sojourn for Isy's birthday, Lou Sanders filled his boots to a supreme degree. The expert on self herself. And what a breath of fresh electric car air she brought. Meanwhile, John tabled some big stepdad energy, we interact with a spirited antipodean and, in a world first, Dave gets shouted down while reading the rules to a Made Up Game.
Fri, 01 Sep 2023 - 289 - #286 - Sesame Oil Surfeits, Nature's Printer and Seagull Supporters
It’s been some month for Johnny JR. Not only did he decide to take on the mammoth task of performing over 700 stand up shows across 31 days, he also remained dedicated to representing 5 Live right from the heart of the Edinburgh Fringe. But with the finish line in sight, and his spirit slowly dwindling, there was just enough time to squeeze in one final live broadcast: and what could make him feel better than having his housemate for the festival, Rob Auton, critique John on his living standards?!
As well as being joined by one of the finest comics out there, Elis shared his love of haggis, Producer Dave struggled to imitate his own voice numerous times, and there was a Made Up Game that went right down to the wire (featuring one of the biggest bottle-jobs of all time).
Fri, 25 Aug 2023 - 288 - #285 - Elis and John Live from Edinburgh
Elis and John venture to both the final boss and tutorial of the comedy world. That's right... Edinburgh! To mark the occasion a live audience descended on Scotland's premier planetarium / part-time comedy venue / largest interactive visitor attraction, and a show of Knebworth level proportions ensued.
For these versatile entertainers the smell of the crowd, the taste of the laughter, and the lack of a live live broadcast brought out 20% more playfulness than when shackled away in a studio; lucky for you listening on the podcast.
Comics Ania Magliano and David O'Doherty grace us with their wit, the team make real hard work of a Made Up Game and John redefines stand-up.
Fri, 18 Aug 2023 - 287 - #284 - Maximum Mystery, Trainecdotes and Internal Risk Assessments
With Elis taking a much deserved holiday, this week John found himself all alone in Edinburgh. But just as it looked like the faders were going to be opened without someone there to act as the ying to his yang, someone walked into the studio not just full of pep… but be-ploughmanned. Who would be so daring as to eat such a meal whilst broadcasting to the nation? Well, obviously there’s only one answer to that question: it was this week's guest co-presenter and all round legend Ivo Graham!
With John and Ivo presenting live and direct from the Scottish capital you just knew there was going to be a whole host of fun on today’s show. Janine Harouni joined the guys to chat about her Fringe experience so far and submit a law into Petty Parliament, Producer Dave tried to SILENCE the news, Ivo attempted to fill in for Elis on DI Robbyns and John realised that he might not love pickled eggs as much as he once thought.
Fri, 11 Aug 2023 - 286 - #283 - Minor Key Comedy, Same Old Larkin and Frank Skinner
The Edinburgh Fringe. The centre of the comedy universe. And the beaming hot star at the centre of said universe, of which every other planet orbits, is the gas giant that is John Robins. Although he’s performing two shows per day whilst up in Scotland he’s still committed to providing the nation with much needed radio. Elis and Producer Dave? Well, they’re holding the fort in London, thus showing that Radio 5 Live truly is the voice of the nation.
But it’s not just John who was in our studio north of the border. The legend that is Frank Skinner dropped by to talk about his new show, as well as enacting a law into Petty Parliament. Plus, there's a Made Up Game resembling a comedian’s fever dream, Tony Livesey reveals his bizarre showering routine, and the Brandy Lady makes another appearance.
Fri, 04 Aug 2023 - 285 - #282 - Oldroyd Sorbet, #Biceps and A Macchichatiato
As the old saying goes “distance makes the heart grow fonder”. But after taking a three week break from live radio in order to make way for 5 Live’s world beating sports coverage, Elis and John proved something else: “distance makes the arms grow beefier”. Yes, 21 days off the radio has given Johnny JR plenty of time to continue his journey to becoming the world's buffest man, and the guys returned to the studio ready to crush any topic put in front of them (though to be honest, given how pumped he looks John was definitely leading the charge).
There was a Made Up Game that focused on Elis’s often negative mentality to competition, John hounded his co-presenter about something he’d recently had bestowed upon him, Producer Dave’s beloved Manchester City takes a hit in Petty Parliament, and the single greatest piece of audio ever recorded wass sent into the show… You knows it.
Fri, 28 Jul 2023 - 284 - #281 - It’s A Blunderful Life (Bonus #Content)
With #Sport once again keeping our hosts off the airwaves of 5 Live, we find Elis, John and Producer Dave in fine fettle as things remain ‘loosey goosey’ for one final week with this bonus podcast.
Elis blows our minds with a blunder revelation that leaves everyone reeling, John comes close to admitting there may be such a thing as too much golf, and Producer Dave enters a Peter Beagrie (Man City, 94-97) reverie whilst painting his garage.
Fri, 21 Jul 2023 - 283 - #280 - Suit, Shoes and Swimming Trunks (Bonus #Content)
There's a real broadcasting buffet on offer today from Elis, John and Producer Dave, as they once again humbly stepped aside so the nation could continue to follow the historic Wimbledon tennis tournament uninterrupted; and given they were provided with the world's vaguest running order, who knew which direction the conversation was going to meander. Thankfully for you, listener, it wended its way right into your hearts and minds (and also your podcast feeds).
A listener sends in a banging remix of everyone's favourite theme tune, John loses his calm about the prospect of calming himself down, Elis shares his recent 'Double Blur' experience, and Producer Dave provides the guys with some more listener Qs that need an A.
Fri, 14 Jul 2023 - 282 - #279 - CCC: Customer Condiment Control (Bonus #Content)
ELIS AND JOHN LIVE AT THE EDINBURGH FRINGE IS NOW FULLY BOOKED
BBC 5 Live is committed to providing every single type of content out there. Tennis? Check. Golf? You bet! Pétanque? Give it time. So when Elis and John were informed that they weren't going to be on air for a few weeks to make way for more classic world-beating sporting coverage it came as no surprise, and thankfully plans had already been put in place to make sure that you the you the listener weren't left short on your weekly quota of chat.
In this free-flow podcast the guys share an exciting announcement, there's more ploughman's correspondence, Dave hosts a listener-driven Q&A, and there's a discussion around the sports most suitable for radio.
Fri, 07 Jul 2023 - 281 - #278 - Stage Time Stresses, Dignity Biscuits and A Barrel of Eggs
Elis and John aren’t on air for a large portion of July, as 5 Live continues to fill its public service broadcasting remit by providing world-beating sports coverage. With their holidays just around the corner (don’t worry, there’ll still be weekly bonus podcasts for you all to enjoy) an air of giddy excitement descended on the studio, with Producer Dave pulling out all the stops to try and tame radio’s most unproducable duo.
There was a Made Up Game for the biscuit purists amongst you, a Petty Parliament suggestion that was met with unanimous agreement, there was ANOTHER twist in 'DI Robbyns', and the guys put poor Nick Wallis through his paces during his first ever appearance on the show (sorry Mrs Wallis).
Fri, 30 Jun 2023 - 280 - #277 - Glastonbury Gripes, Fiscal Vasectomies and Perfect Ploughmi
Recently, dreams turning into reality has become quite a regular occurrence on the show. First, John became the buffest broadcaster in Britain. Then, Producer Dave’s beloved Manchester City won the Champions League for the first time, completing a historic treble. But today, the biggest of dreams was realised… That’s right: everyone’s favourite support cigarette - Fagsy - was brought to life, and the feeling of love in the studio was palpable.
Elsewhere, there’s a Made Up Game all about Glastonburys gone by, a Petty Parliament caller dials in with a Glastonbury practice that he wants outlawed, Elis reminisces about a time he went to Glastonbury, and John has some rather interesting thoughts on the world-beating Glastonbury coverage being provided by the BBC across the Glastonbury festival.
Fri, 23 Jun 2023 - 279 - #276 - King Vinegar, Precinct Penchants and the Magic of Chiles
The ‘Hometown Triumvirate’ is a rare occurrence in the world of radio. A collector’s item, some might say. Well today, completists got their wish, with Carmarthen, Bristol and ‘the north’ being the respective locations of Elis, John and Producer Dave, as the BBC’s world-beating broadcasting infrastructure was pushed to its very limits, all in the name of cross country content.
Ethernets, modems, ISDN lines and the internet (general) all played their part as features old and new were rolled out. Episode 2 of new audio drama DI Robbyns once again left listeners on the edge of their seats, the lightboards switched up as our fleet-footed hosts juggled a plethora of text topics, plus the dulcet tones of Adrian Chiles made for an unforgettable Made Up Game.
Enjoy!
Fri, 16 Jun 2023 - 278 - #275 - Bumbag Bravado, Remunerationships and Adam From Bungay
New studio, new Elis James and John Robins? Not a chance; no matter how many times one disgruntled listener might text into the show they’ll never change their loveable ways! However, change was certainly afoot content wise, as the guys launched a brand spanking new feature which ticks all of Producer Dave’s boxes (except maybe getting people ready for the weekend). Yes, you’re about to hear the very first episode of DI Robbyns - and no, this isn’t a Radio 4 podcast.
Elsewhere, John comes up with about thirty different text topics, Elis shares his love for the inimitable Mr Urdd, Producer Dave brags about a recent purchase and a listener shares their musical talents LIVE on air.
Fri, 09 Jun 2023 - 277 - #274 - Date City Central, Forty Slinks and Reece With A Spoon
‘Excitement’ was the word on everyone’s lips at the BBC today… and for good reason. First, they were excited about the fact that the wonderful Lou Sanders was sitting in for Elis whilst he treated himself to a luxury spa break in Montenegro. Then, the excitement grew even more as John entered the studio looking more buff than ever before. And just when we thought the excitement couldn’t grow any more, Producer Dave announced he was off to relive his early 20s by going to see the Arctic Monkeys. And with that, the holy trinity of excitement was sorted, perfectly placed to surf the radio waves.
There’s a real treat in store for you today, featuring the following audible accoutrements: a listener talking about the time they were outwitted by a pigeon, John channelling his inner local radio presenter, Lou absolutely destroying her co-presenter in a scripted intro, and Producer Dave trying his best to stay balanced in a Made Up Game.
Fri, 02 Jun 2023 - 276 - #273 - Kwik Save Clothes, Tallinn Jokes and Big Bisc
It’s a good job that the microphones in Broadcasting House are on adjustable mic stands, because for today’s show self-certified posh person Sir Elis James was presenting from atop a felt-lined throne, whilst the peasants that are John and Producer Dave were forced to sit on upturned wooden buckets, never once making eye contact with his highness. And as an offering to the people, Sir James presented a venerable feast of content… the broadest content in the land!
John shares a teary Turkish restaurant tale, the guys come up with their own range of soft toys, someone mistakes James Bond for Ed Miliband and Elis gives us an insight into his favourite darts chants.
Fri, 26 May 2023 - 275 - #272 - Noodle Season, Taunton Pastrami and Foyer Residencies
What do you get if you cross an elite-level goalkeeper, a man carrying a chopping board in his rucksack and someone who just can’t wait to get ready for the weekend? That’s right, you get the Elis James and John Robins show on BBC 5 Live. And whilst Elis never did get a chance to show off his chopping skills, he did get a chance to slice through some freshly picked correspondence about what weird advice listeners have been given (which was much more interesting than the onion-based fun we had planned).
There was a rather controversial Made Up Game, we heard a toilet tale that stoked the embers of shame, the age-old question “How do you get a wolf to trust you?” is answered, and a listener shared their grievances with how people say “Goodbye… bye… bye… bye”.
Fri, 19 May 2023 - 274 - #271 - Fragrant Disregard, Druids In Need and The Man of Steele
Is there anything more scintillating than overhearing three good friends goofing around on national radio? Well according to Producer Dave there is, and it's catching the scent of a handsome man eating eggs Benedict on a quiet Friday morning. But unlike radio, you can't Shazam a fragrance, so instead Dave decided to put his Northern charm to good use and find out exactly why this man's aroma was so wonderful. It turns out the cost of smelling good is £200, so it's safe to say that Dave is sticking to his good old can of Lynx.
Away from all the 'smelltalk', ahead of a big goalkeeping performance John was given some tips from a former professional shot-stopper, there was some real snackable content in a Made Up Game, we heard the story of an old tin of meat, and Elis provided us with one of the greatest anecdotes of all time.
Oh, and for the triangulation fans amongst you, the the centre point for today's broadcast was just west of Stratford on the A46. Strap in!
Fri, 12 May 2023 - 273 - #270 - Toddler Tatts, Centenary Sprinters and Own Brand Stout
With the coronation of King Charles III just hours away, Elis and John were giddy with excitement in a balanced and compliant way, with streets parties, Union Jack body paint and temporary Royal tattoos all extolled when discussing weekend plans.
And yet even with the chaps’ eager anticipation reaching fever pitch, it’s incredible to think they were still able to compose themselves for a top tier parliamentary Made Up Game, a fascinating ‘this is your life’ chat with fellow 5 Liver Tony Livesey, and an incredibly detailed discussion about aftershave.
Fri, 05 May 2023 - 272 - #269 - Bonus Mobility, Long Awaited Wazzes and Aggers On Dressage
‘Informative… punctual… fun’. These are all words you’d associate with a consummate broadcaster. But ‘bravery’? No, that’s an adjective that’s reserved for one broadcaster and one broadcaster only. That’s right: John Robins. He doesn’t just say what he thinks people want to hear, he says what he thinks others need to hear; and nobody (especially Producer Dave) can stop him. So if you want your weekly fix of bravery, you’re in the right place.
John is handed the baton of improvisation, we hear some wonderful retirement dreams, Elis questions some of the refereeing decisions during a Made Up Game, and there is a Shame Well that royally cracks up the studio.
Fri, 28 Apr 2023 - 271 - #268 - The Royal Tab, Insanity Platters and DI Robbyns
Elis has returned from Dave's favourite continent sunkissed and with renewed vigour. As he saw the On Air light blink red there was a determination is his voice that he was going to carry John on this show no matter how much muscle the man from Buffinghamshire has put on.
Thankfully, there was no need for such strenuous exertion as John arrived in peak comedic fitness. He dug into Elis's bold breakfast choices at the hotel buffet and in a radio first listed every single mug that you can find in his cupboard. That's 16, to be precise.
Also expect an assonance-heavy Made Up Game and a caller who got the boys purring.
Fri, 21 Apr 2023 - 270 - #267 - Atomic Bum, Apologetic Moshing and Yo Shoeshi
Over the past few months it’s been well documented that Elis James is the busiest man on earth, so this week he decided to take some much needed time off to top up his tan / vibe stores. But who could keep his seat warm whilst he keeps himself warm in Portugal? There was only one man for the job: everyone’s favourite Old Etonian (depending on which newspaper you read), the one and only Ivo Graham! And just like a loan player looking to make their mark in lower league football, he wasn’t content with sitting on the bench! He got stuck in from the first minute, gave John the runaround and even left a leg in on Producer Dave.
There’s a Made Up Game which some (including the higher-ups at 5 Live) have branded ‘risky’, Ivo takes a look through this week’s broadsheets, John discusses his most recent step to becoming a beefcake, and a loveable East End builder stops by to give us a quote. Bosh!
Fri, 14 Apr 2023 - 269 - #266 - Single Pringles, Sportageddon and 225 Lollipop Ladies
With a MASSIVE announcement from the Elis and John Tax Year Calendar, a HUGE Made Up Game involving a behemoth of the broadcasting world, and a GIGANTIC faux pas from Producer Dave when describing his weekend plans, you’d be forgiven for looking on in disbelief when finding out today’s show is only 90 minutes long.
Alongside all this bigness, Elis arrives at the studio with a very special guest, John sulks because of certain scoring parameters, and everyone just about remains on the right side of the undue prominence line when debating a Petty Parliament item.
Fri, 07 Apr 2023 - 268 - #265 - Vampire Grannies, Breaking Beale and John’s Dream Seat
What car would Huw Edwards drive? Where is John’s favourite spot to sit on a crowded train? Does Elis know how much a second class stamp costs? Does new feature The Riff Symposium actually work? All valid questions, with some fascinating answers* that are all revealed, divulged or discussed across two hours of scintillating radio with Elis and John.
And amongst the cut and thrust of top notch seat-of-your-pants broadcasting, there was a Made Up Game that delivered, an Ask John that informed, and a Petty Parliament that divided.
*Burgundy Mercedes E-Class estate, near the toilets, maybe - we're hopeful.
Fri, 31 Mar 2023 - 267 - #264 - Slimline Biscuits, Impartial Spines and Tweet The Internet
The floors of Broadcasting House were shaking this morning, as Beefcake Robins entered the studio fresh from achieving yet another personal best at the gym. His continued workout efforts have seen him rise to second in the table of the “5 Live Ripped Rankings”, and he’s got Rick Edwards firmly in his reach. And to show just how strong he’s become he was able to present the whole show with Elis on one shoulder and Producer Dave on another, all whilst maintaining perfect form.
In a show which had “giddy energy” running through its veins the guys speak to a wildlife Unsung Hero, Elis’s social media habits are put under the microscope, John tries to figure out what car Tony Livesey drives, and Producer Dave’s eyes turn black from stress.
Fri, 24 Mar 2023 - 266 - #263 - Dockers Dictionary, Postcode Dave and Floss Comedy
The higher-ups at the BBC might be able to restrict Elis and John to an hour's worth of radio in order to make room for the Cheltenham Festival, but do you know what they won't ever restrict? An appetite for quality chat that is SO ravenous they're able to make a 60-minute show feel like an 85-minute show because of just how much they've jammed into it!
Producer Dave puts the guys through their comedy paces with another Riff Symposium, there's a discussion about Adrian Chiles' new money-making scheme, a listener tells us how brilliant Sweden is and John continues to flex his muscles (if only you could see them).
Plus, John appeared on 5 Live Breakfast this morning as part of their 'In My Opinion' feature, so as a special treat we've included that too.
Fri, 17 Mar 2023 - 265 - #262 - Robot Lasagne, Sink Sabotage and Ping When You’re Winning
A surprise at every turn, content on the cusp of being toooo edgy, and with some bits a little too revealing for the more conservative consumer.. Elis and John on 5 Live, or the Elis and John Tax Year Calendar (available at bbc.co.uk/elisandjohn, fyi)?
BOTH! With today’s explosive offering matching the #daring and #dangerous extremes of everyone’s favourite wall-hung charity organiser.
There was sink-based drama, microwave-based shenanigans, plus some other stuff that isn’t centred around the kitchen.
Enjoy!
Fri, 10 Mar 2023 - 264 - #261 - Riff Yourself Thin, Sexy Elis and Bury’d In Shame
In an unexpected turn of events John has become something of a 'gym head', and today in the studio he asked Elis and Dave to touch his muscles 12 times (far more than the usual three times). Thankfully the guys didn't pass out with passion: they were able to take the excitement they felt after John tensed up his biceps and translate it into top notch broadcasting.
Today's show featured an on-air reunion with an old pal, a Shame Well that has already been submitted into the 'Awards' folder, everyone's favourite cheeky postman stopped by... and it was all delivered with a touch of class!
Do YOU want access to back-to-back shame? Thankfully you're in luck, as 'Shame Well' is now available as its own playlist on BBC Sounds! Just search 'Shame Well' on the greatest app on earth to listen to some of the best shame from over the years uninterrupted.
Fri, 03 Mar 2023
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