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Securely Attached is your go-to parenting podcast, supporting moms and dads from pregnancy all the way through their child's adolescence and every stage in between. Join us every Tuesday as clinical psychologist and mom of two Dr. Sarah Bren shares her expertise and interviews top experts in the field, simplifying complicated concepts and pulling back the curtain on the brain science and psychology that drives and shapes the parent-child relationship. And now, every Thursday, Dr. Sarah Bren is joined by Dr. Emily Upshur and Dr. Rebecca Hershberg for a special segment, Beyond The Sessions. We're answering YOUR parenting questions from the perspective of clinical psychologists highly trained in developmental science and real-life moms who get that parenting is messy, and sometimes we have to laugh, cry, and throw out the "rules." From toddler tantrums, to effective discipline strategies, to leaning into the principles of respectful parenting, and to managing your own mental wellness as a parent—this podcast is your ultimate resource for judgment-free, research-backed information you know you can trust. About Sarah Bren, PhD Dr. Sarah Bren is a licensed clinical psychologist and mom of two who helps parents understand the building blocks of child development and how secure relationships form and thrive. Her work is focused on helping parents find their inner confidence so they can respond to any parenting problem that comes along and raise kids who are healthy, resilient, and kind.
- 459 - Q&A: How to know if my child may have depression?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions!
In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about what to do when your young child seems sad all the time, how to know when it's something to be concerned about, and when it might be time to seek additional support.
We explore:
Is it typical for a 4-year-old to say they're sad every day, even when they can't explain why?
How to tell the difference between developmentally typical sadness and potential signs of childhood depression.
The subtle changes in your child's behavior that may be important clues about their emotional well-being.
Why the intensity, frequency, and duration of your child's sadness may tell you more than what's actually making them sad.
When to trust your instincts and seek a professional evaluation, even if you're not sure anything is seriously wrong.
What therapy actually looks like for a preschooler, and how young children can work through difficult emotions without needing to talk about them directly.
Why involving parents in a young child's therapy can be so valuable, even when the parent-child relationship isn't the source of the problem.
If your child has been telling you they're sad, seems less like themselves lately, or you're struggling to know whether what they're experiencing is a normal part of childhood or something that deserves a closer look, this episode will help you understand what to pay attention to, when to seek support, and why getting help doesn't have to mean something is terribly wrong.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
🔗 Concerned about your child's emotional well-being? If your child has been experiencing persistent sadness, depression, or other emotional challenges, Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers specialized child therapy and parent support to help families better understand what's going on and find a path forward. Whether you're noticing subtle changes in your child's mood or wondering if it's time to seek professional help, our team is here to support you. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services or schedule a free 30-minute consult to find the right support for your child and family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Tue, 03 Nov 2026 - 24min - 458 - How stress affects your child's brain and body: The science of co-regulation, resilience, and healing with Dr. Nicki Bush
Developmental psychologist and UCSF professor, Dr. Nicki Bush, joins me this week to explore stress and how it affects our children and what parents can do to help protect their child's developing brain and body.
Together we explore:
Why some stress can actually be good for your child, and when it starts to become harmful.
The surprising ways stress can show up across your child's behavior, learning, mental health, and physical health.
How your own nervous system communicates safety or danger to your child, even when you aren't saying a word.
Why being a calm parent does not mean never feeling stressed, anxious, angry, or overwhelmed.
What happens inside the body when we rest, and why your own rest may be more important for your child than you realize.
Why focusing solely on changing a child's behavior can cause us to miss what is actually driving it.
How working with the parent-child relationship can sometimes be more powerful than treating the child alone.
The remarkable research showing that relationship-based therapy may actually change the biological effects of early trauma and stress and maintain those effects long after the therapy ends.
Why early experiences matter so much, but do not have to determine your child's future.
If you've ever worried about how your own stress might be affecting your child, wondered whether difficult experiences can have lasting effects, or felt pressure to keep your child calm and happy, this conversation offers a much more hopeful way to understand stress. Because our biology is remarkably adaptable, and the relationships children have with the people who care for them can be a powerful part of how they heal, grow, and thrive.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🔗 Intergenerational Developmental Health Program
📱LinkedIn: Nicole (Nicki) Bush, PhD
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
🔗 Prenatal-to-3 Policy Impact Center
🔗 The National Child Traumatic Stress Network
👉 If your child is struggling, support doesn't always have to mean sending them to therapy on their own. At Upshur Bren Psychology Group, we work with parents and children together at our Westchester, NY offices, and we also offer virtual parent support, where we can work exclusively with you to better understand what's driving your child's behavior, strengthen your relationship, and create meaningful change for your whole family. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more or schedule a free consultation.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
Tue, 27 Oct 2026 - 59min - 457 - Beyond chores: How to teach kids to notice what needs to be done and share the mental load with Sam Kelly
Sam Kelly, author of Notice and Do, and I talk about why simply assigning chores may not be enough. While chores can teach responsibility, they often overlook an important first step. Before kids can take initiative, they have to learn how to notice what needs their attention without waiting for us to point it out.
Together we explore:
Why constantly reminding your child to clean up, put something away, or help out may unintentionally keep you carrying the mental load.
The important difference between teaching kids to do chores and teaching them to notice what needs to be done.
A surprisingly simple exercise you can try at home to start building this skill in just 10 to 15 minutes.
Why something that feels completely obvious to you may require far more executive functioning than you realize for your child.
How to scaffold these skills without nagging, micromanaging, or eventually giving up and doing it yourself.
What to do when your child rolls their eyes, pushes back, or simply refuses to participate.
How to adapt this approach for kids with ADHD, strong-willed kids, and children who need more support with executive functioning.
Why teaching kids to carry some of the mental load isn't really about having a cleaner house, but about shaping the partners, friends, family members, and adults they eventually become.
If you're exhausted from constantly telling everyone what needs to be done, this conversation offers a different way to think about chores, responsibility, and what it actually takes to raise kids who see what needs doing and know how to step in.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚 Notice and Do: Raise Capable Kids, End Motherhood Burnout, and Lighten Your Mental Load
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about balancing the load of parenthood with Lauren A. Tetenbaum
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode with a deep dive on parental burnout
Tue, 20 Oct 2026 - 45min - 456 - Raising emotionally healthy boys: How to protect connection, vulnerability, and their authentic selves with Dr. Adam McCormick
Dr. Adam McCormick, professor, social worker, and author joins me to explore what happens to boys' emotional worlds as they grow up, and how parents can help their sons stay connected to the parts of themselves they may otherwise learn to hide.
Together we explore:
Why so many boys gradually disconnect from emotions they once expressed freely.
The powerful role shame can play beneath anger, withdrawal, and challenging behavior, and why boys often don't have the language to recognize it.
How even well-intentioned parents may respond differently to their sons' emotions without realizing it.
Why trying to fix a boy's feelings can sometimes get in the way of the connection he actually needs.
What boys learn when they feel valued for who they are, rather than for how they perform.
Why small moments of delight, attention, play, and connection can have a much bigger impact than we realize.
A simple shift that can make it easier for boys to open up about the things that matter most.
How we can hold boys accountable for their behavior while still staying curious about what that behavior may be communicating.
Why helping boys stay connected to their inner worlds now may shape the friendships, romantic relationships, and emotional lives they build later.
Whether you're raising a toddler, a teenager, or somewhere in between, this conversation offers a hopeful reminder that boys don't need us to teach them how to feel. They need us to help protect the emotional capacities they already have, so they don't have to lose connection with themselves in order to feel like they belong.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚Healing the Helping Professional: The Unfinished Business of Childhood Trauma
📱LinkedIn: Adam McCormick
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about raising emotionally intelligent sons with Ruth Whippman
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about why boys and girls need different things with Michael Gurian
Tue, 13 Oct 2026 - 56min - 455 - Q&A: Am I wrong...or did my doctor give bad parenting advice?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
What to make of advice that tells you not to comfort your child when they're distressed.
Why a frightened toddler at the doctor's office is communicating something very different than "bad behavior."
The common misunderstanding about reinforcement that leaves many parents second-guessing themselves.
Whether responding to your child's fears actually makes them more dependent or "too attached."
How to know when it's okay to trust your instincts, even when they conflict with advice from an authority figure.
What attachment research actually says about soothing, separation, and healthy independence.
Why one difficult interaction doesn't have to become something you worry about "damaging" your child.
If you've ever left a doctor's appointment feeling unsettled by advice that didn't sit right, or found yourself wondering whether comforting your child is helping or hurting, this episode will give you the confidence to better understand what's happening beneath your child's behavior and trust your instincts as a parent.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
🎧 Is it better for my kids if I send them to daycare, have a nanny, or become a stay-at-home mom?
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode with the basics of attachment theory
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Tue, 06 Oct 2026 - 11min - 454 - The neuroscience of resonance: How to use language to strengthen attachment with your child with Sarah Peyton
Author, speaker, and neuroscience educator Sarah Peyton joins me to explore what happens when attachment theory, Nonviolent Communication, and the science of resonance come together.
Together we explore:
Why feeling understood is so important for your child's developing brain, nervous system, and sense of self.
The fascinating difference between empathy and resonance, and why that distinction matters in our relationships with our kids.
How your own attachment history can influence the way you respond when your child is upset, reactive, or pushing your buttons.
Why the same behavior from your child might barely bother you one day, and feel completely intolerable the next.
How Nonviolent Communication can help you look beneath your child's behavior and get curious about the feelings and needs driving it.
The surprising connection between secure attachment and independence, and why pushing children to become more independent can sometimes have the opposite effect.
How becoming more resonant with your child can begin to shift your own attachment patterns too.
Why changing the way you relate to your child doesn't happen overnight, but can profoundly change your relationship over time.
Whether you're trying to break patterns from your own childhood, understand why certain parenting moments feel so triggering, or simply want to feel more connected to your child, this conversation offers a fascinating new way to think about what it really means to feel seen, understood, and securely connected.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚 Your Resonant Self: Guided Meditations and Exercises to Engage Your Brain's Capacity for Healing
📱IG: @sarahpeytonauthor FB: Empathy Brain YouTube: Sarah Peyton
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
🎧 Learn more about what Nonviolent Communication is with Oren Jay Sofer
📚 The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk M.D.
👉 Looking for additional support? Upshur Bren Psychology Group helps children and adults heal from attachment wounds, relational trauma, and difficult early experiences, so you can feel more grounded in yourself and build healthier, more connected relationships with the people who matter most. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services or schedule a free 30-minute consultation to find the right support for you.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about Polyvagal Theory with Dr. Stephen Porges
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the lifelong impact of early relationships with Dr. Alan Sroufe
Tue, 29 Sep 2026 - 59min - 453 - The connection crisis: Why kids are struggling with friendship and what parents can do with Dr. Niobe Way
Dr. Niobe Way, developmental psychologist and bestselling author, sits down with me to explore why meaningful connection is so essential for our children, and what may be getting in the way of their natural capacity to build it. Drawing on decades of research with children and adolescents, Dr. Way challenges some of our most deeply held assumptions about what kids need to thrive and offers a hopeful look at the skills they already possess.
Together we explore:
Why children may be far more intrinsically caring, cooperative, and curious than we give them credit for.
What happens to kids' desire for deep, meaningful friendships as they move from childhood into adolescence, and why boys' experiences may surprise you.
The overlooked connection between your child's social health and their mental health.
Why secure attachment is incredibly important, but may not be enough to protect kids from the cultural messages they receive as they grow.
How our well-intentioned focus on achievement can indirectly send our kids a message we never meant to communicate.
Why the questions we ask our children can either shut down connection or open the door to an entirely different kind of conversation.
What Dr. Way discovered when she stopped questioning her daughter about homework and started getting curious about something she didn't particularly want her watching on TikTok.
The surprisingly simple skill that may help children feel more seen, strengthen their friendships, and even support their learning.
What parents can do at home to nurture the relational skills our children are already wired to have.
If you've ever worried about your child's friendships, wondered how to stay connected as they get older, or felt caught between preparing them to succeed and helping them become caring, connected humans, this conversation offers a powerful new way to think about what our kids need most.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚 Rebels with a Cause: Reimagining Boys, Ourselves, and Our Culture
📱 IG: @wayniobe FB: Niobe Way LinkedIn: Dr. Niobe Way
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
🔗 Parenting support for kids who are battling the epidemic of depression, anxiety and crisis of connection in today's society - supporting both parents and the kids themselves
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the lifelong impact of early relationships with Dr. Alan Sroufe
Tue, 22 Sep 2026 - 1h 06min - 452 - How to build a secure attachment with yourself: The connection between self-worth and parenting with Dr. Marisa G. Franco
Dr. Marisa G. Franco, psychologist and author of the new book Worth: The New Science of Self-Esteem and Secure Attachment, sits down with me to explore a side of attachment we don't talk about nearly enough: our relationship with ourselves.
Together we explore:
Why trying to "act secure" may actually leave you feeling more insecure.
What it really means to become "secure-ish," and why security doesn't require getting rid of your anxiety, insecurity, or uncomfortable emotions.
The surprising connection between attachment and self-worth, and why changing how you feel about yourself may require more than positive thinking.
How experiences from your past can become a blueprint for what you expect from relationships today, and the fascinating science suggesting that blueprint can be edited.
Why being the agreeable, easygoing person isn't always as healthy as it looks, and where all those suppressed emotions can eventually go.
What your relationship with your own emotions has to do with how you respond when your child is having big ones.
Why some parents find themselves losing it more with the people they love the most, even when they're working incredibly hard to stay calm.
How learning to welcome the parts of yourself you've spent years trying to change may be one of the most powerful ways to build genuine security from the inside out.
If you've ever wondered why you can understand secure attachment intellectually but still find yourself falling into old patterns, this conversation offers a very different way of thinking about what it actually means to feel secure, not just in your relationships, but within yourself.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚 Worth: The New Science of Self-Esteem and Secure Attachment
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
🔗 Click HERE to download my free guide, The Four Pillars of Fostering Secure Attachment, helping you parent with a focus on attunement and trust.
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about fostering secure attachment relationships
Tue, 15 Sep 2026 - 48min - 451 - Picky eating, protein, food dyes, and nutrition myths: What parents actually need to know with Jennifer Anderson
Jennifer Anderson, registered dietitian, founder of Kids Eat in Color, and author of the new book Feed Them Well: A Guide to Raising Healthy, Confident Eaters for Life, joins me to help parents cut through the noise around nutrition, focus on what actually matters, and let go of the guilt, perfectionism, and fear that so often surround mealtimes.
Together we explore:
Why the atmosphere around the table may matter just as much as what's on your child's plate.
The surprising reason play can be one of the most effective tools for helping picky eaters become more adventurous.
How to tell the difference between nutrition advice that's worth paying attention to and the headlines designed to scare you.
The simple framework Jennifer uses to help parents stop worrying about every food trend and focus on the changes that make the biggest difference.
Why talking about foods as "good" or "bad" may shape the way children think about eating in ways we don't always realize.
What parents can do when the usual feeding advice doesn't seem to work for their unique child.
How your own relationship with food may be influencing your child's, often without you even realizing it.
The permission every parent needs to stop chasing perfect nutrition and start building a healthier relationship with food for the whole family.
Whether you're navigating picky eating, trying to cut through the endless stream of nutrition advice online, or simply hoping mealtimes can feel a little less stressful, this conversation will leave you feeling calmer, more confident, and equipped with practical strategies you can start using right away.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚 Feed Them Well: A Guide to Raising Healthy, Confident Eaters for Life
📱 IG: @kids.eat.in.color TikTok: @kids.eat.in.color FB: Kids Eat in Color
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Need support with picky eating or feeding challenges? If mealtimes have become a source of stress, or your child is struggling with picky eating, ARFID, or other feeding challenges, Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers parent coaching to help you better understand what's driving your child's eating and learn practical, evidence-based strategies to support them. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more or schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about picky eating, ARFID, and SPACE with Dr. Yaara Shimshoni
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about nurturing open mindedness in kids through food with Priya Krishna
Tue, 08 Sep 2026 - 58min - 450 - "Gentle parenting" isn't enough: Why kids need both emotional validation and boundaries with Dr. Siggie Cohen
Dr. Siggie Cohen, child development specialist, parenting expert, and author of the new book You Are the Parent joins me to discuss why so many parents today feel overwhelmed, second-guess themselves, and wonder if they're getting it all wrong.
Together we explore:
Why so many well-intentioned parents get stuck in a cycle of trying new parenting strategies that never seem to work, and what to focus on instead.
The subtle difference between validating your child's emotions and accidentally reinforcing behaviors that aren't helping them.
Why behavior doesn't change because of the perfect consequence or script, but because of something much deeper happening within the parent-child relationship.
The common child development misconceptions that leave parents expecting too much or too little from their children.
Why repeating the same explanations over and over often isn't the answer, even when your child seems like they "aren't listening."
How to respond to hitting, aggression, and other challenging behaviors in ways that support both emotional regulation and healthy boundaries.
What it really means to become your child's leader without becoming controlling, harsh, or authoritarian.
How to begin changing long-standing family patterns, even if your child is older and you've been parenting a different way for years.
The powerful mindset shift that can help you stop parenting from fear and start trusting yourself again.
If you've ever worried about whether you're validating too much, setting too many limits, or simply trying your best while feeling pulled in a dozen different parenting directions, this conversation will help you cut through the noise, feel more confident in your role, and better understand what children truly need to thrive.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
Tue, 01 Sep 2026 - 56min - 449 - Back by Popular Demand: How to support your child's secure attachment even if you didn't grow up with it with Dr. Miriam Steele
As part of our 5-Year Anniversary Summer Series, we're bringing back one of the most meaningful and foundational conversations in Securely Attached history.
Many parents worry that if they didn't experience a secure attachment in their own childhood, they'll unknowingly repeat those same patterns with their children. But one of the most hopeful findings in attachment research is that our past does not have to determine our children's future.
In this conversation, I sit down with renowned attachment researcher Dr. Miriam Steele to explore how secure attachment develops, how insecure attachment patterns are passed from one generation to the next, and, most importantly, how we can break those cycles.
Together we discuss:
What secure and insecure attachment really mean, and some of the biggest misconceptions surrounding attachment theory.
How children develop different attachment strategies in response to their early caregiving experiences.
Why secure attachment is built through consistent responsiveness, not perfect parenting.
The surprising research showing that parents don't need to be attuned all the time for children to develop secure attachment.
What reflective functioning is and how it helps parents interrupt intergenerational cycles of insecure attachment.
Why understanding your own childhood experiences can transform the way you parent your children.
The difference between attachment science and popular "attachment parenting."
Why repair matters more than getting it right every time.
Practical ways to strengthen your relationship with your child, even if you didn't grow up with secure attachment yourself.
The hopeful message that it is never too late to create a more secure future for your family.
This conversation is a powerful reminder that secure attachment is not about perfection, nor is it determined by the childhood you had. It is built through thousands of ordinary moments of connection, curiosity, repair, and reflection. Dr. Steele's research offers tremendous hope that when we become more aware of our own patterns and learn to respond with greater understanding, we have the power to change the trajectory not only of our own lives, but of future generations.
⭐ Celebrating 5 Years of Securely Attached ⭐
If you've enjoyed the podcast over the years, we'd love your help celebrating this milestone. Our birthday wish is simple: five stars for five years. If these conversations have supported you and your family, please consider leaving a five-star review on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen. Your support helps more parents discover the show and allows us to continue bringing these conversations to families around the world.
Tue, 25 Aug 2026 - 50min - 448 - Q&A: What should I do if my child has intrusive thoughts?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
What intrusive thoughts actually are. How to recognize when a repetitive question or worry is more than ordinary curiosity, and the subtle clues that can help you tell the difference. The types of topics (like private parts, germs, or order) that are most common in intrusive thinking. The simple shift that can help your child stop identifying with the thought and begin seeing it as something separate from who he or she is. Why reassurance often brings only temporary relief, and what tends to work better in the long run. Practical, child-friendly strategies that can help kids feel more in control when their brains get "stuck" on a thought. How to respond in ways that reduce shame, build confidence, and help your child develop the skills to cope with intrusive thoughts over time.Whether your child is experiencing intrusive thoughts because of anxiety, OCD, PANS/PANDAS, or you're simply wondering if what you're seeing is developmentally typical, this episode will help you better understand what's happening inside your child's mind and give you practical tools to respond with confidence and compassion.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Looking for support for a child struggling with anxiety, OCD, or intrusive thoughts? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers evidence-based treatment for children and families, including SPACE (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions), Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), and a combination of approaches tailored to your child's unique needs. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more or schedule a free 30-minute consultation with our care team. We'll listen carefully, answer your questions, and help you determine the best next step for your family.
📚 What to Do When Your Brain Gets Stuck: A Kid's Guide to Overcoming OCD by Dawn Huebner
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 20 Aug 2026 - 33min - 447 - Child custody through divorce: Navigating the courts and building a custody schedule that works with Michael Fried
Michael Fried, a family law attorney at Berkman Bottger Newman & Schein joins me to help parents navigating divorce better understand what to expect when it comes to child custody, how courts make custody decisions, and how to create a parenting agreement that truly serves their child's best interests.
Together we explore:
Why today's courts increasingly begin with the assumption that children benefit from strong relationships with both parents, and what that means for custody decisions.
The common mistake parents make when approaching custody and why "winning" isn't actually the goal.
What judges are really looking for when determining a child's best interests.
How to think about 50/50 custody, and why there isn't one schedule that's right for every family.
The developmental factors that should shape a parenting plan, from toddlers to teenagers.
Practical strategies that help children adjust to living in two homes with greater security and less stress.
The communication tools that can reduce conflict and make co-parenting more successful, even when the relationship between parents is strained.
What parents should document during a custody case and when it makes sense to revisit a parenting agreement as children grow.
Whether you're considering divorce, actively navigating a custody arrangement, or simply want to better understand how to protect your child's emotional well-being through a separation, this conversation offers practical guidance grounded in both legal expertise and child development.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🔗 Berkman Bottger Newman & Schein LLP
📱 LinkedIn: Michael L. Fried IG: @bbnsfamilylaw FB: Berkman Bottger Newman Schein LLP
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
📱 Our Family Wizard - A safe platform that takes care of all communication during divorce and co-parenting
👉 Navigating separation or divorce? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers specialized support at every stage of the process, including therapy and coaching, parenting and co-parenting support, family therapy, and weekly divorce groups for women and children. Whether you're in the middle of a split or adjusting to a new family structure, our team is here to help you and your children feel steady and supported. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more or schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the right support for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about whether "nesting" during a divorce is better for your kids
Tue, 18 Aug 2026 - 52min - 446 - Q&A: How can I get my child to be potty trained at night?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
Why staying dry overnight is very different from daytime potty training, and what many potty training books get wrong.
The surprising reason some children simply aren't biologically ready, no matter how motivated they or their parents are.
How to recognize the difference between a child who needs more practice and one who simply needs more time.
The low-pressure approach that can actually make nighttime potty training feel easier for everyone.
Small ways to build your child's confidence and independence, even if they're still waking up wet.
Why paying attention to your child's internal body signals may matter more than sticker charts or rewards.
When bedwetting is still completely within the range of typical development, and when it's worth bringing it up with your pediatrician.
If your child is still wearing pull-ups at night or nighttime potty training hasn't gone the way you expected, this episode will help you better understand the biology behind nighttime dryness and offer practical, compassionate strategies to support the process without adding unnecessary pressure.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode with everything you need to know to successfully potty train your child
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 13 Aug 2026 - 18min - 445 - How to use music to strengthen your child's attachment, reduce stress, and create more moments of connection with Vered Benhorin
Vered Benhorin, music therapist and Baby in Tune founder, joins me to explore how music and connection can be powerful tools in your parenting toolbox.
Together we explore:
Why creating just a few intentional moments of connection each day matters far more than trying to be perfectly present all the time.
The simple shift that can transform ordinary routines like diaper changes, snack time, or bedtime into relationship-building moments.
How music can help you stay playful and connected before everyday frustrations turn into power struggles.
Why following your child's lead during moments of exploration benefits both of your nervous systems.
How songs can become emotional shortcuts that help your child feel safe, understood, and connected when big feelings arise.
The surprising reason these "bubble moments" are just as important for parents as they are for children.
Why the joy and wonder children experience can help us see the world differently, no matter how old they are.
Whether you're parenting a newborn, a toddler, or a teenager, this conversation is a gentle reminder that secure attachment isn't built through perfection. It's built through small moments of presence, delight, and connection that add up over time.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚 What Do I Do with My Baby All Day?!: Simple Ways to Have the Best First Year Together
📱IG: @babyintune
🎧 33. How parents can use music as an emotion regulator with music therapist Vered
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
Tue, 11 Aug 2026 - 45min - 444 - Q&A: Does my child have anxiety or are they just highly sensitive?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
Why some children seem to worry about everything, from strange noises to monsters under the bed, even when nothing dangerous is happening.
How to tell the difference between anxiety, a highly sensitive temperament, and a nervous system that's simply taking in the world more intensely.
Why your response to your child's fears may matter more than finding the perfect explanation or reassurance.
The subtle ways parents can accidentally strengthen anxiety, and what to do instead.
What behaviors like lip picking, nail biting, or constantly chewing on things may actually be communicating.
Simple ways to help your child's nervous system feel calmer without making anxiety the center of attention.
When it's worth seeking professional guidance, and why getting support early doesn't necessarily mean something is wrong.
If your preschooler seems to worry about everyday things, startles easily, or always seems to be on high alert, this episode will help you better understand what's driving those behaviors and give you practical, compassionate strategies to help them feel safer, more regulated, and more confident.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉🏻 Are you parenting a child with anxiety or OCD and looking for tools to support them? CLICK HERE to learn more about Upshur Bren Psychology Group's SPACE (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions) program or SCHEDULE A FREE CALL to see if it's the right fit for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the line between supporting your child and feeding their anxiety
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 06 Aug 2026 - 22min - 443 - Back by Popular Demand: What to do when your child says, "I'm stupid," "I hate myself," or "I'm a bad kid"
As part of our 5-Year Anniversary Summer Series, we're bringing back one of the most impactful parenting conversations in Securely Attached history.
Few moments are more heartbreaking than hearing your child say, "I'm stupid," "I'm a bad kid," "I hate myself," or even, "I wish I wasn't here." Our instinct is often to reassure them, convince them they're wrong, or make those painful feelings disappear as quickly as possible. But what if those words are actually your child's way of communicating something much deeper?
In this conversation, Dr. Emily Upshur joins me to explore what negative self-talk is really telling us, how to respond in the moment, and how to help children build resilience, confidence, and a healthier inner voice over time.
Together we discuss:
What children are often trying to communicate when they use harsh or self-critical language.
Why our first instinct to reassure or correct may not be the most helpful response.
What to say in the moment when your child says, "I'm stupid," "I'm a bad kid," or "I hate myself."
How to respond differently with preschoolers, school-age children, and older kids.
Why it's important to look beneath the words to the feelings driving them.
How to recognize when negative self-talk is becoming a repeated pattern.
Why calm, connected debriefs are often more effective than trying to solve everything in the moment.
Practical ways to build resilience, confidence, and a growth mindset in everyday life.
How to model healthy self-talk and coping skills for your child.
Why these moments, while unsettling, can become powerful opportunities for connection and emotional growth.
This conversation offers a compassionate framework for responding to some of the most difficult things a child can say. Rather than reacting from fear or rushing to make the feelings disappear, we remind you that these moments are invitations to connect, understand what your child is really experiencing, and help them develop the emotional skills they'll carry with them for years to come.
⭐ Celebrating 5 Years of Securely Attached ⭐
If you've enjoyed the podcast over the years, we'd love your help celebrating this milestone. Our birthday wish is simple: five stars for five years. If these conversations have supported you and your family, please consider leaving a five-star review on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen. Your support helps more parents discover the show and allows us to continue bringing these conversations to families around the world.
Tue, 04 Aug 2026 - 40min - 442 - Q&A: What do I do when my child says "no" to everything?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
Why children who are loving, sweet, and cooperative in many moments can still get stuck saying "no" to the smallest requests.
What your child's resistance may actually be communicating, and why it often has very little to do with the task itself.
A simple shift that can help break the cycle when every request seems to turn into a power struggle.
Why giving your child more opportunities for independence can actually make them more willing to cooperate when it really matters.
How to approach recurring battles, like tooth brushing, in a way that invites collaboration instead of more resistance.
The one conversation to have before trying another consequence, reward, or punishment.
Why sometimes the fastest way forward is to slow down and reset the relationship first.
If your child keeps saying "no" or seems to turn everyday routines into a battle of wills, this episode will help you understand what's really driving the behavior and give you practical strategies to build more cooperation without getting pulled into constant power struggles.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
Dr. Ross Greene and Collaborative & Proactive Solutions (CPS)
💥 Tired of constant battles with your child? Watch my ✨FREE✨ workshop, Overcoming Power Struggles, where I'll teach you the exact strategies I use in my clinical practice to help parents break free from the cycle of yelling, threats, and negotiations—and instead foster cooperation, connection, and calm. Just visit drsarahbren.com/powerstruggles to get instant access to this workshop.
👉 Want to get my research-backed framework for increasing cooperation and emotion regulation skills in your sensitive child? Check out Parenting by Design, my guided program to help you parent your unique child in a way that increases cooperation, defuses power struggles, and rebuilds their trust in your authority–all while supporting your child's mental health and your own.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 30 Jul 2026 - 19min - 441 - The gut-brain connection: How food affects your child's mood, behavior, and mental health with Dr. Uma Naidoo
In this episode, I sit down with nutritional psychiatrist, professional chef, and bestselling author Dr. Uma Naidoo to explore the fascinating science behind the gut-brain connection and what it means for parents. Rather than focusing on restriction or perfection, Dr. Naidoo shares a practical, realistic approach to using food as one more tool to support your child's emotional well-being.
Together we explore:
Why your child's gut may be influencing far more than just digestion.
The surprising reason adding foods to your child's diet may be more powerful than taking foods away.
What most parents misunderstand about protein, and the nutrient no one is talking about that many kids are actually missing.
How ultra-processed foods may be affecting mood, focus, and emotional regulation in ways you wouldn't expect.
Simple swaps that can support your child's brain without making mealtimes more stressful.
Why "food as medicine" isn't about replacing therapy or medication, but giving your child another layer of support.
The mindset shift that makes healthy eating feel more realistic, sustainable, and far less overwhelming.
Easy, family-friendly strategies that can help nourish both your child's body and brain.
Whether you're raising a picky eater, wondering how nutrition fits into your child's mental health, or simply looking for realistic ways to support your family's well-being, this conversation will leave you with practical ideas you can start using right away.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚 Calm Your Mind with Food: A Revolutionary Guide to Controlling Your Anxiety
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Looking for extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and parent coaching for moms, dads, and families who want to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and support their child's development. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services or schedule a free 30-minute consultation to find the right support for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about GLP-1s and parenting with Dr. Rachel Goldman
Tue, 28 Jul 2026 - 49min - 440 - Q&A: Is my 3-year-old being rude or just acting their age?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
Why toddlers often sound rude or demanding without actually intending to be.
The developmental reason young children focus on getting their needs met rather than how their words affect others.
When to gently teach manners in the moment and when it's better to focus on connection instead.
How to model polite language without creating shame or turning every interaction into a correction.
Why understanding what's underneath your child's words can help you respond with more patience and less frustration.
How to tell the difference between a child who is simply being direct and one who is becoming overwhelmed or dysregulated.
Simple ways to encourage respectful communication through modeling, playfulness, and everyday practice.
Whether your toddler barks orders, interrupts constantly, or seems to demand things instead of asking politely, this episode will help you better understand what's driving those moments and show you how to teach respectful communication in a way that supports your child's development while strengthening your relationship.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what to do when your child says "I hate you"
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 23 Jul 2026 - 18min - 439 - Back by Popular Demand: The neuroscience of sleep training, bed sharing, and baby sleep with Dr. Greer Kirshenbaum
As part of our 5-Year Anniversary Summer Series, we're bringing back one of the most downloaded and talked-about episodes in Securely Attached history.
Few parenting topics generate as much confusion, anxiety, and conflicting advice as sleep. In this conversation, neuroscientist, doula, and author of The Nurture Revolution, Dr. Greer Kirshenbaum, joins me to explore what the science actually tells us about infant sleep, sleep training, bed sharing, contact sleep, and the role responsiveness plays in early brain development.
Together we discuss:
Whether night waking is a normal and developmentally expected part of infant sleep.
What neuroscience tells us about how babies learn to feel safe during sleep.
What sleep training does and does not change about infant sleep.
The different approaches to sleep training and how they compare.
The science behind contact sleep, room sharing, and bed sharing.
How societal expectations around sleep can contribute to parental anxiety and guilt.
Ways to support your baby's sleep while honoring both your child's needs and your own.
How to think about sleep decisions without shame, fear, or pressure.
Why it is never too late to strengthen connection and secure attachment, regardless of the sleep choices you've made in the past.
This conversation offers a compassionate, science-backed perspective on one of parenting's most emotionally charged topics. Rather than telling parents what they should or should not do, Dr. Kirshenbaum empowers families with the information they need to make informed decisions that feel right for their unique child, their mental health, and their family. Most importantly, this episode reminds us that parenting is not about perfection. It is about understanding our children, responding with intention, and building connection one moment at a time.
⭐ Celebrating 5 Years of Securely Attached ⭐
If you've enjoyed the podcast over the years, we'd love your help celebrating this milestone. Our birthday wish is simple: five stars for five years. If these conversations have supported you and your family, please consider leaving a five-star review on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen. Your support helps more parents discover the show and allows us to continue bringing these conversations to families around the world.
Tue, 21 Jul 2026 - 1h 08min - 438 - Q&A: How can I get my toddler to brush their teeth without a power struggle?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
Why trying harder often makes tooth brushing harder, and what to focus on instead.
The surprising reason lowering your expectations in the short term can actually lead to better long-term habits.
How to tell whether your child is resisting because of autonomy, sensory sensitivities, or something else entirely.
Why treating tooth brushing like learning a brand-new skill, no matter your child's age, can completely change your approach.
Simple ways to use play, exposure, and curiosity to help your child feel more comfortable with brushing.
Small changes to your routine that can dramatically reduce bedtime power struggles.
Creative ideas to make tooth brushing feel less threatening and more engaging, even for children who have fought it every step of the way.
Whether your child refuses to open their mouth, insists on brushing independently, or runs away the moment the toothbrush comes out, this episode will help you move away from daily battles and toward a calmer, more connected approach that builds cooperation over time.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
💥 Tired of constant battles with your child? Watch my ✨FREE✨ workshop, Overcoming Power Struggles, where I'll teach you the exact strategies I use in my clinical practice to help parents break free from the cycle of yelling, threats, and negotiations—and instead foster cooperation, connection, and calm. Just visit drsarahbren.com/powerstruggles to get instant access to this workshop.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 16 Jul 2026 - 24min - 437 - Nonviolent Communication in parenthood: A communication framework that can transform the way you parent with Oren Jay Sofer
Oren Jay Sofer, mindfulness teacher, communication expert, and author of Say What You Mean, joins me to explore the principles of Nonviolent Communication, a powerful framework that helps us communicate in ways that foster connection, reduce conflict, and strengthen relationships.
Together we explore:
Why your child's challenging behavior may be pointing to something much deeper than disobedience.
The surprising shift that can completely change how you approach power struggles.
Why memorizing parenting scripts often falls flat, and what to focus on instead.
How your own unmet needs may be fueling the very conflicts you're trying to solve.
The simple mindset change that can help you stay calmer when emotions run high.
What children are really learning from every interaction, even when things don't go as planned.
How to set firm boundaries without relying on shame, fear, or punishment.
A practical communication strategy that can make it easier for children to cooperate.
Whether you're parenting a toddler, school-aged child, or teenager, this conversation offers a thoughtful framework for navigating everyday challenges with greater presence, compassion, and confidence, while strengthening the secure attachment your child depends on.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🔗 https://www.orenjaysofer.com/
📚 Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication
📚 Teaching Mindfulness to Empower Adolescents
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
Tue, 14 Jul 2026 - 58min - 436 - Q&A: How can I support my child with PANS or PANDAS through anxiety and OCD?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
Whether parents should wait to address anxiety or OCD symptoms while their child is in a PANS or PANDAS flare.
How to tell the difference between supporting your child and unintentionally strengthening anxiety.
Why the SPACE (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions) approach helps parents create lasting change without requiring their child to participate in therapy.
Why you don't have to start with the biggest or hardest challenge to see meaningful progress.
How reducing just a few anxiety-driven routines can lead to improvements across many different areas of your child's life.
Practical ways to help your child build confidence in handling anxiety while feeling deeply supported and understood.
Resources for parents who want to learn more about SPACE therapy and find trained providers.
Whether your child has PANS, PANDAS, OCD, or anxiety more broadly, this episode will help you better understand your role in the treatment process and give you practical, evidence-based strategies for supporting your child with confidence, compassion, and hope.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
🔗Demystifying PANS/PANDAS Podcast with Nancy O'Hara MD
👉 Looking for support for a child struggling with anxiety or OCD? If your child is struggling with anxiety or OCD, Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers SPACE-based parent support through both a virtual group and individualized care. Go to upshurbren.com/space to learn more or book a free 30-minute consultation with our care team, who will listen carefully and help you determine the best support for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about PANS/PANDAS with Dr. Nancy O'Hara
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the line between supporting your child and feeding their anxiety
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 09 Jul 2026 - 23min - 435 - Back by Popular Demand: Teaching children emotion regulation through co-regulation with Dana Rosenbloom
As part of our 5-Year Anniversary Summer Series, we're bringing back one of the most popular and foundational episodes in Securely Attached history.
When children are overwhelmed by big feelings, many parents wonder how to help them calm down, listen, or use the coping skills they've been taught. But before children can regulate themselves, they first need to experience regulation through relationships.
In this conversation, I sit down with early childhood specialist Dana Rosenbloom, founder of Dana's Kids, to explore the powerful role co-regulation plays in helping children develop emotional regulation skills, resilience, and self-awareness.
Together we discuss:
What co-regulation is and why it is the foundation of emotional development.
Why emotional dysregulation is often contagious for both parents and children.
How to stay grounded when your child is overwhelmed by big feelings.
Why the goal is not to be perfectly calm all the time.
How children learn emotional regulation through our modeling and presence.
Why getting comfortable with your child's discomfort can be one of the most important parenting skills.
The difference between being a detective and being a teacher during challenging moments.
How to respond when your child is upset about a limit you've set.
Why a child's rejection of a boundary is not a reflection of your effectiveness as a parent.
The role repair plays in building resilience, confidence, and connection.
This conversation offers a compassionate and practical framework for understanding children's behavior through the lens of regulation rather than compliance. Dana reminds us that emotional outbursts are not signs that we've failed as parents or that our children are failing. They are opportunities for connection, learning, and growth. Most importantly, this episode is a powerful reminder that before we can co-regulate with our children, we must first learn how to regulate ourselves.
⭐ Celebrating 5 Years of Securely Attached ⭐
If you've enjoyed the podcast over the years, we'd love your help celebrating this milestone. Our birthday wish is simple: five stars for five years. If these conversations have supported you and your family, please consider leaving a five-star review on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you listen. Your support helps more parents discover the show and allows us to continue bringing these conversations to families around the world.
Tue, 07 Jul 2026 - 45min - 434 - Q&A: How do I tell my children we're getting divorced?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
The best way parents can tell their children that they are planning to separate or get divorced. How to approach this conversation in a way that helps children feel safe, supported, and loved. What parents should share, what they should avoid sharing, and why it's important to focus on what you know rather than what you don't know yet. The key reassurances every child needs to hear, even if they never ask the questions out loud. Why children of different ages may react very differently to the news and how to tailor your approach to your child's developmental stage. How to respond when children react with sadness, anger, blame, resistance, or seemingly no reaction at all. Practical ways to help children adjust to changes in the family while maintaining a sense of stability and connection. When it may be helpful to involve a therapist or family professional for additional support.This episode will help you approach one of the most difficult conversations a family can face with greater confidence, compassion, and clarity while supporting your child's emotional well-being through the transition.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Navigating separation or divorce? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers specialized support at every stage of the process, including therapy and coaching, parenting and co-parenting support, family therapy, and weekly divorce groups for women and children. Whether you're in the middle of a split or adjusting to a new family structure, our team is here to help you and your children feel steady and supported. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more or schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the right support for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about whether "nesting" during a divorce better for your kids?
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 02 Jul 2026 - 29min - 433 - Raising a neurodivergent child: How connection, co-regulation, and self-compassion change everything with Debbie Reber
Debbie Reber, founder of Tilt Parenting and author of Differently Wired, joins me for a deeply honest conversation about what it really means to raise a neurodivergent child and why supporting these children begins with changing the way we understand them, not trying to change who they are.
Together we explore:
What it really means to be "differently wired" and why that shift in language matters.
Why so many parents of neurodivergent children feel isolated, even as awareness continues to grow.
The hidden emotional work of parenting children with ADHD, autism, and other forms of neurodivergence.
How understanding your child's nervous system can transform the way you respond to meltdowns and big emotions.
Why co-regulation starts with your own self-regulation and practical ways to support both.
How to move from trying to "fix" behavior to building connection, safety, and trust.
Why repair matters more than getting parenting "right."
How raising a neurodivergent child can lead parents into profound personal growth and healing of their own.
Whether you're parenting a neurodivergent child, wondering if your child might be differently wired, or simply looking for a more compassionate way to understand children's behavior, this conversation offers both practical tools and a powerful mindset shift.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚 Differently Wired: A Parent's Guide to Raising an Atypical Child with Confidence and Hope
📱IG: @tiltparenting FB: Tilt Parenting YouTube: Full-Tilt Parenting with Debbie Reber
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
💻 Dr. Dan Siegel - Explains Mirror Neurons in Depth
🔗 Listen to Dr. Mona Delahooke on the Securely Attached podcast and read her book, Brain-Body Parenting
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about ADHD and attachment security with Dr. Norrine Russell
Tue, 30 Jun 2026 - 55min - 432 - Q&A: Why does my child follow me from room to room?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
How to support a child who struggles with separation anxiety, even at home. Why some kids follow their parents from room to room and constantly want to stay close. How to respond when your child says "I miss you" without accidentally reinforcing anxiety. Why validating your child's feelings is important, but rescuing them from distress can sometimes make separation harder over time. Simple ways to help children build confidence tolerating small separations through play, connection, and gradual stretching. How to figure out your child's "stretch point" so you can support growth without overwhelming them. Creative ways to use timers, playfulness, collaboration, and connection to help kids practice independence. How parents can reduce accommodations around anxiety while still staying warm, supportive, and emotionally attuned.This episode will help you better understand what may be driving your child's clinginess or separation struggles and give you practical, compassionate strategies for helping them build confidence and independence over time.
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how you can have a smoother daycare or school drop-off
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 25 Jun 2026 - 20min - 431 - Back by Popular Demand: Using Presence as the Antidote to Trauma with Dr. Jacob Ham
Dr. Jacob Ham, licensed clinical psychologist and Director of the Center for Trauma and Resilience at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai, joins me for a profound conversation about trauma, attachment, presence, and the relational experiences that help us heal.
Together we explore:
Why trauma is not defined solely by what happened to us, but by how those experiences continue to shape the way we relate to ourselves and others. The difference between living from a state of survival and living from a state of presence. How trauma can disrupt our natural capacity to move fluidly between connection, protection, openness, and autonomy. Why healing does not happen through insight alone, but through relationships that allow us to experience safety, reflection, and connection. The concept of reflective functioning and why it is one of the strongest predictors of secure attachment across generations. How becoming aware of our internal "chatter" can help us respond with greater compassion toward ourselves and our children. Why rupture and repair are a normal and necessary part of healthy relationships. How parents can begin breaking intergenerational cycles by cultivating curiosity, awareness, and presence.This conversation offers a powerful reminder that secure attachment is not built through perfection. It is built through our willingness to stay present, remain open to reflection, and continually return to connection with ourselves and the people we love. Dr. Ham shares a deeply hopeful perspective on how healing happens and how even small moments of awareness can begin to transform the patterns we pass on to the next generation.
Tue, 23 Jun 2026 - 58min - 430 - Q&A: How can I help my child adjust to a big move?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
How to prepare young children for a big move without overwhelming them. Why moving can feel surprisingly emotional and disorienting for kids, even when the change is positive. Simple ways to help children understand what's changing, what's staying the same, and what they can expect in their new home. Why visual supports, transitional objects, and goodbye rituals can help kids feel more grounded during major transitions. How to help children stay connected to important relationships after moving away from friends, teachers, and familiar places. Why making new friends can feel especially stressful for some kids, and how parents can help them feel more confident socially. Practical ways parents can create emotional continuity, safety, and connection before, during, and after a move.This episode will help you better understand how children experience major transitions and give you thoughtful, practical ways to support your child emotionally through a move.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 18 Jun 2026 - 16min - 429 - Why anxiety can be good for us: Helping your child handle fear, uncertainty, and discomfort with Dr. Tracy Dennis-Tiwary
Dr. Tracy Dennis-Tiwary, clinical psychologist, researcher, and author of Future Tense: Why Anxiety Is Good for You (Even Though It Feels Bad), joins me to talk about why anxiety is one of the most misunderstood emotions in parenting.
Together we explore:
The surprising difference between anxiety that helps us grow and anxiety that gets in the way. Why anxiety may be helping your child (and you!) more than you realize. How to tell when anxiety is healthy and when it's becoming a problem. Why some of the most common responses to childhood anxiety can backfire. The surprising connection between anxiety, hope, and resilience. How parents can become a source of calm without dismissing or fixing their child's feelings. The simple shift that can help you stop seeing anxiety as the enemy. Dr. Dennis-Tiwary's three-step framework for responding to anxiety in yourself and your child.This conversation offers a powerful reframe for parents who want to support their children through anxiety without reinforcing fear or avoidance. It is about learning to see anxiety not as an enemy, but as a normal part of being human, and helping our children develop the confidence to face uncertainty, navigate discomfort, and trust their ability to handle life's challenges.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🔗https://www.tracydennistiwary.com/
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Looking for support for a child struggling with anxiety or OCD? If your child is struggling with anxiety or OCD, Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers SPACE-based parent support through both a virtual group and individualized care. Go to upshurbren.com/space to learn more or book a free 30-minute consultation with our care team, who will listen carefully and help you determine the best support for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
Tue, 16 Jun 2026 - 51min - 428 - Q&A: How should I respond when my child touches herself?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
Why it is completely normal for young children to explore their bodies and engage in self-soothing behaviors. How parents can respond to self-touching in a calm, shame-free, developmentally appropriate way. The difference between setting healthy boundaries and unintentionally communicating shame around bodies or pleasure. Why some children may use self-touching as a form of sensory input, comfort, or emotional regulation, especially at bedtime. How to teach children about privacy and body boundaries using neutral, age-appropriate language. What to do when self-touching is happening in a shared bedroom or around siblings. Ways to help children expand their self-soothing toolbox with other calming sensory and bedtime supports. Why parents' own discomfort or cultural messaging around sexuality can sometimes shape how these moments feel. How to navigate sibling questions or reactions without making the behavior feel scary or secretive. The importance of helping children feel safe, accepted, and connected to their bodies while still maintaining appropriate boundaries.This episode will help you feel more confident responding to common childhood self-soothing and body exploration behaviors with calm, clarity, and compassion.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what to do when your son always has his hands down his pants
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to get your 3-year-old to do things they don't want to do
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 11 Jun 2026 - 14min - 427 - How collaborative divorce and positive psychology can reduce conflict and support your children with Andrea Vacca
Collaborative divorce attorney and positive psychology practitioner Andrea Vacca joins me to talk about something many families don't realize is possible: a way to move through divorce without escalating conflict or damaging long-term relationships.
For many people, divorce is synonymous with battle. It's something to survive, something to win, or something to endure at all costs. But as Andrea explains, that model often makes an already painful experience even harder for both parents and children.
In this conversation, we explore how a more intentional, team-based approach can help families navigate divorce in a way that supports emotional well-being, preserves dignity, and sets the foundation for healthier co-parenting moving forward.
Together, we discuss:
What collaborative divorce is and how it differs from traditional litigation. Why you don't need strong communication skills to start this process, just a willingness to try. How a team-based approach (including mental health and financial professionals) supports the whole family. The biggest myths about collaborative divorce, especially for high-conflict couples. How positive psychology can help shift your mindset from survival to growth during divorce. The concept of a "good enough" agreement and how it can reduce unnecessary conflict. How emotional regulation impacts decision-making during divorce. What it actually looks like to create a thoughtful, durable co-parenting plan. How to revisit and improve parenting plans, even after a divorce is finalized. How parents can protect their child's sense of stability during a major family transition.This conversation is about more than divorce. It's about how we navigate major life transitions, how we stay grounded in our values under stress, and how we make decisions that support not just short-term relief, but long-term well-being for ourselves and our children.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Navigating separation or divorce? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers specialized support at every stage of the process, including therapy and coaching, parenting and co-parenting support, family therapy, and weekly divorce groups for women and children. Whether you're in the middle of a split or adjusting to a new family structure, our team is here to help you and your children feel steady and supported. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more or schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the right support for your family.
https://www.collaborativepractice.com/
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about divorcing with less conflict with Katherine Miller
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about whether "nesting" during a divorce is better for your kids
Tue, 09 Jun 2026 - 49min - 426 - Q&A: How can I help my sensitive child stand up for themself to peers?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
How to support a sensitive, gentle child in becoming more confident using his voice with peers. The difference between helping your child build self-advocacy skills and trying to change their temperament. How to teach kids simple, effective boundary-setting tools that actually work in fast-paced peer interactions. Why "old soul" kids may naturally learn polite, sophisticated communication, but still need help practicing more direct forms of assertiveness. Playful ways to practice boundary-setting and self-advocacy skills at home through games and role play. How to know when to step in as a parent and when to allow kids space to navigate social challenges on their own. Why it's important to match a child's communication tools to the intensity and energy of the situation they're in. The importance of checking whether a child is actually distressed before assuming a social interaction is a major problem.This episode will help you feel more confident supporting your child's self-advocacy skills while still honoring their unique temperament, sensitivity, and personality.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how you can parent your child to not be a people pleaser
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 04 Jun 2026 - 18min - 425 - A deep dive into strengthening your child's attachment as they grow: What children need from us at every stage of development
In this deep dive episode, I explore how secure attachment evolves across development and what children are really needing from us emotionally at each stage of childhood and adolescence. Using Erik Erikson's stages of psychosocial development as a framework, we look at the core emotional tasks kids are navigating from infancy through young adulthood, and how our role as parents shifts alongside them.
Together, we explore:
What secure attachment looks like at different developmental stages. How to stay connected to your child as their needs evolve over time. Why toddlers push for independence and what they need from us in those moments. How play, boredom, and curiosity support emotional development in early childhood Why school-age kids become more focused on achievement, perfectionism, and peer comparison. How social media can intensify insecurity during key developmental windows. Why adolescence can suddenly feel so emotionally intense and unpredictable. How to stay a secure base for your teen without escalating power struggles. What today's loneliness epidemic can teach us about raising emotionally connected kids. Why repair matters more than perfection in secure relationships. How understanding your child's developmental task can completely shift the way you respond to behavior.This episode is ultimately about learning to zoom out. Not to parent each stage perfectly, but to better understand what your child is actually working through underneath the behaviors, emotions, and developmental shifts that can sometimes leave us feeling confused or disconnected. Because when we understand the developmental needs driving our child's behavior, we can respond with more clarity, compassion, and connection.
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 02. Attachment Theory and Fostering Secure Attachment Relationships
Tue, 02 Jun 2026 - 53min - 424 - Q&A: How do I help my child sleep independently without pressure?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
Whether co-sleeping is actually a problem, or simply a parenting choice that works for some families. How to tell the difference between connection-based co-sleeping and anxiety-driven sleep struggles. Why independent sleep is a skill that develops over time through practice, not pressure. How to support your child's growing independence without making them feel rejected. What it can look like when children naturally begin transitioning out of their parents' bed on their own. How to approach sleep transitions gently if co-sleeping stops working for your family. Why there is no one "right" way to handle sleep arrangements, and how to focus on what works best for your child, your relationship, and your family as a whole. The importance of safe co-sleeping practices and understanding how to co-sleep safely with young children.This episode will help you feel more confident navigating co-sleeping, independent sleep, and nighttime connection in a way that feels aligned with your family's needs, values, and stage of life.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Stay up to date on the latest podcast episode, tips and tricks, and parenting resources by joining my newsletter. Go to drsarahbren.com, scroll down to the bottom of the page and click "Join my community" to get weekly emails from me.
🎧 Tune into the original question that this episode is a follow up to: Is letting my anxious child sleep in my bed helping or making their anxiety worse?
🔗American Academy of Pediatrics: Safe Sleep
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 28 May 2026 - 14min - 423 - The mattering gap: Why so many parents feel invisible, overwhelmed, and disconnected with Jennifer Wallace
Jennifer Wallace joins the podcast to explore a powerful but often overlooked foundation of mental health and resilience: the human need to feel like we matter. While so much of parenting focuses on what we do for our kids, this conversation invites us to look inward, because a child's sense of mattering is deeply shaped by how much their parents feel valued, seen, and significant in their own lives.
Drawing from research and real-life stories, we unpack why so many adults today feel invisible, overwhelmed, or defined by achievement, and how that shapes the way we show up in our relationships with our children.
Together we explore:
What it actually means to "matter" and why it's different from self-esteem or a sense of purpose. Why parents today are at risk of feeling like they don't matter, and how that impacts their kids. The connection between mattering, anxiety, burnout, and loneliness. A simple framework for building deeper, more meaningful relationships. Why "delight" is a critical ingredient in helping children feel secure and valued. How to model a healthy sense of self so your child doesn't feel pressure to be your "everything." Practical ways to help kids both feel valued and add value in their families and communities. How showing others they matter can actually be the fastest way to feel like you matter too.This conversation is a reminder that parenting doesn't happen in a vacuum. When we feel grounded in our own worth, supported by meaningful relationships and a sense of connection, we create the conditions for our children to internalize that same belief: you matter, just as you are.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚Mattering: The Secret to a Life of Deep Connection and Purpose
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
🔗 Feeling weighed down by mom-guilt, identity shifts, or the mental load of parenting? Upshur Bren Psychology Group specializes in maternal mental health and offers therapy and coaching to help you feel more grounded and supported. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more about support options or schedule a free consultation call so we can share recommendations for a personalized plan to meet your unique needs.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about fostering deep and meaningful relationships with Dr. Rick Hanson
Tue, 26 May 2026 - 45min - 422 - Q&A: How do I tell my child he's going to start therapy?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
Why it's important to tell your child that they are starting therapy (and why many parents avoid it). How to explain therapy in simple, developmentally appropriate language your child will actually understand. Why using your child's own words for their struggles, like "worry" or "big feelings," matters. What to call a therapist and how to describe what they do in a way that makes sense to kids. What to do if your child asks, "Is something wrong with me?" Why getting your child's buy-in matters and how to help them feel invested. How to frame therapy as something the whole family is working on together.This episode will help you feel more confident in how to approach this conversation, reduce anxiety around starting therapy, and support your child in a way that builds trust, openness, and emotional resilience.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
📚 Want to learn more about talking to your child about going to therapy? Read Upshur Bren Psychology Group's blog article: How to Tell Your Child You're Taking Them to Therapy: A Compassionate, Practical Guide for Parents
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to know if your child is too young for therapy
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to know if group therapy would be a good fit for your child
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 21 May 2026 - 23min - 421 - Nature vs nurture: Understanding sensitivity, resilience, and what really shapes kids with Dr. Jay Belsky
Dr. Jay Belsky joins the podcast to explore one of the most important and often misunderstood truths in parenting: the same environment does not affect every child the same way. Drawing from decades of research on nature and nurture, this conversation looks at how biology and experience work together to shape development, and why some kids are more sensitive to their environments while others are more resilient.
Together, we explore:
Why some children are more affected by parenting, stress, and environment than others. The difference between sensitivity and susceptibility, and why it matters for long-term development. What "developmental plasticity" is and how it shapes the way kids respond to their experiences. Why resilience is not always a good thing and sensitivity is not always a problem. How nature and nurture work together to shape each child in unique ways. The one thing within a parent's control that can help protect children from adversity. How to shift from trying to control outcomes to supporting the child you have. The difference between "carpenter" parenting and "gardener" parenting, and why it changes everything. How to set realistic expectations for yourself and your child without lowering the bar.This conversation offers a powerful reframe for parents who feel confused, overwhelmed, or frustrated when what works for one child doesn't work for another. It is about understanding your child as an individual, letting go of the pressure to get it exactly right, and focusing on what truly supports healthy development over time.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚The Nature of Nurture: Rethinking Why and How Childhood Adversity Shapes Development
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
📚The Gardener and the Carpenter: What the New Science of Child Development Tells Us About the Relationship Between Parents and Children by Alison Gopnik
📚 The Nurture Assumption: Why Children Turn Out the Way They Do by Judith Rich Harris
👉 Want to get my research-backed framework for increasing cooperation and emotion regulation skills in your sensitive child? Check out Parenting by Design, my guided program to help you parent your unique child in a way that increases cooperation, defuses power struggles, and rebuilds their trust in your authority–all while supporting your child's mental health and your own.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about orchid and dandelion children with Dr. W. Thomas Boyce
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to support your sensitive, "spicy," highly emotional child?
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about preventing burnout when you have a sensitive child
Tue, 19 May 2026 - 1h 03min - 420 - Q&A: How do I help my toddler cope with an absent parent?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
What the research actually says about attachment and why one strong, secure relationship is enough for healthy development. Why your child asking for the other parent may actually be a sign of a secure attachment, not a problem. How toddler development (around age 2) shapes their awareness of family structure and separation. How to talk about an absent parent in a way that is simple, neutral, and developmentally appropriate. The importance of naming and validating your child's feelings, like sadness, curiosity, or confusion. How your own emotional responses can influence how often your child brings this topic up. Why these questions often show up at bedtime and how to respond while still holding bedtime boundaries.This episode will help you feel more grounded and reassured in your role as a parent, and more confident in how to support your child through big feelings, hard questions, and family differences in a way that strengthens your connection.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers in-person and virtual therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about fostering secure attachment
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 14 May 2026 - 21min - 419 - Creating a calmer home: Using design and organization to support your child's nervous system with Rachel Melvald
Rachel Melvald joins the podcast to explore a powerful but often overlooked influence on our children's behavior, mood, and regulation: the spaces they live in. Drawing from her work in Neurodesign, this conversation looks at how our home environment shapes the nervous system and impacts how both kids and parents feel and function.
Together, we explore:
How clutter and visual overwhelm increase cognitive load and dysregulation in kids (and adults). Why fewer toys can actually support more focused, creative, and independent play. How predictable, organized spaces help children feel safer and more regulated. The role of sensory input, like lighting, color, texture, and movement, in shaping behavior and mood. Why natural elements are so powerful for calming the nervous system. How to think about different spaces in your home and the function you want them to serve. Simple, practical changes that can have an immediate impact on how your home feels. How design can support not just individual regulation, but connection, boundaries, and family relationships.This conversation offers a new lens on parenting, one that goes beyond behavior strategies and focuses on the environment itself. It's about creating spaces that support regulation, connection, and well-being for the whole family.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🔗https://www.psychitecture.com/
📚NEURODESIGN: The Art and Science of Harmonious Living
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
Tue, 12 May 2026 - 52min - 418 - Q&A: What should I do when my toddler fights diaper changes and refuses to use the potty?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...
What to do when your toddler refuses the potty and fights diaper changes, leaving you stuck in a frustrating in-between stage. Why diaper changes and potty training resistance is often less about the potty and more about control and autonomy. Common ways power struggles often show up during diaper changes and potty training. Simple and practical strategies to give your child more agency without losing necessary boundaries to reduce tension and make diaper changes feel less like a battle. Creative strategies to build positive associations with the bathroom. What it looks like to go slower with potty training, and why that can be more effective.This episode will help you approach diaper changes and potty training with less pressure, more clarity, and practical strategies to reduce the daily struggles while supporting your child's growing independence.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode with a deep dive into potty training
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to handle potty regressions in older children
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 07 May 2026 - 15min - 417 - How to help your child have a healthier relationship with screens: The psychology behind what actually works with Catherine Price
Catherine Price returns to the podcast to talk about one of the biggest challenges facing parents today: how to help kids build a healthier relationship with screens. Drawing from her new book, The Amazing Generation (co-authored with Jonathan Haidt), this conversation explores how to move from power struggles and fear-based messaging to approaches that build insight, agency, and real buy-in from kids themselves.
Together, we explore:
Why simply telling kids to "get off screens" often backfires. What kids are actually getting from screens (and what they're missing). How to explain to kids that tech companies are designed to capture attention in a way that makes them feel empowered. Why "real world" experiences are critical for development and how screens can crowd them out. Practical ways to support connection and independence without defaulting to smartphones. How to have conversations about screens that don't lead to shutdown or conflict. Simple shifts that can help your child become more aware, reflective, and intentional with technology. Why building a full, engaging life offline naturally reduces screen time.This conversation is about more than just screen time. It's about helping kids develop the awareness, confidence, and agency to make choices that align with the kind of life they actually want to live, and how we, as parents, can support that process.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚 The Amazing Generation: Your Guide to Fun and Freedom in a Screen-Filled World
🔗 Free Guide: The Family Guide to Screen/Life Balance: Your 7-Day Plan for Fewer Fights and More Fun
📚 How to Break Up with Your Phone, Revised Edition: The 30-Day Digital Detox Plan
📚 The Power of Fun: How to Feel Alive Again
📱 IG: @catherinepriceofficial
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
🔗 Upshur Bren Psychology Group
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Whether it's screen time battles, feeling stuck in constant pushback, or trying to help your child make healthier choices without power struggles, these patterns can be hard to shift on your own. Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers in-person and virtual therapy and parent coaching to help you build insight, strengthen connection, and create meaningful, lasting change. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services or schedule a free 30-minute consultation to find the right support for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the hidden dangers of EdTech with Andy Liddell
Tue, 05 May 2026 - 49min - 416 - Q&A: How do I support my child with language delays during playdates?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about how to support a child who is struggling to communicate with their peers.
Together we explore:
The difference between scaffolding and helicopter parenting, and how to find the right balance. How your goals for a playdate can shape how much you step in. The role of context, including the child your kid is playing with and how familiar they are with each other. What scaffolding can actually look like in the moment, beyond just helping with words. How narrating and "sportscasting" interactions can support both kids without taking over. How to tune into your child's cues to determine whether something is truly a problem. The trap of overthinking and how to recognize when things might actually be going just fine.This episode will help you feel more confident in knowing when to step in, when to step back, and how to support your child's social and communication skills in a way that builds both competence and connection.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping a child who struggles with perfectionism
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about fostering secure attachments in peer relationships
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 30 Apr 2026 - 13min - 415 - Lice explained: How to treat it, stop the spread, and skip the shame, from a registered nurse
Nurse and founder of My Lice Advice, Theresa, joins me to talk about one of the most common (and surprisingly emotional) parenting challenges: lice. While lice is something most families will encounter at some point, it often brings a wave of panic, shame, and overwhelm. But as Theresa explains, it doesn't have to.
Together, we explore:
Why lice has become so stigmatized and what's actually driving the shame parents feel. The biggest myths about lice (including cleanliness and how it spreads). What lice actually is and how it's passed from child to child. How to talk to your child about lice in a way that is calm, clear, and shame-free. What you do not need to clean (and how to avoid unnecessary overwhelm). The most effective ways to treat lice based on current research. What to look for to know a treatment has actually worked. Simple prevention strategies that can reduce the likelihood of future cases. How to stay regulated and approach lice as something manageable, not catastrophic.This conversation is about more than just lice. It's about how we respond to the unexpected moments in parenting, how we manage our own anxiety, and how we model calm, capable problem-solving for our kids.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
🔗 Nit Free Terminator Lice Comb
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about social anxiety in parenthood with Justine Carino
Tue, 28 Apr 2026 - 43min - 414 - Q&A: Why does my child go from being fine to melting down in a matter of seconds?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about what to do when your child goes from calm to meltdown in what feels like seconds, especially during everyday moments like turning off the TV, leaving the park, or cleaning up.
Together we explore:
Why going from "0 to 60" is actually more common than you think, especially for sensitive kids. How setting and holding limits can still be the right thing to do, even when it leads to a meltdown. The mindset shift that can help you feel less frustrated when big reactions happen. The role of transitions and why they can feel so much harder for kids than they do for adults. Practical ways to anticipate and soften tough moments before they escalate. How things like hunger, fatigue, and overwhelm can make reactions bigger and faster. Simple strategies like giving warnings, breaking tasks into smaller steps, and joining your child in the process. Why slowing down and pausing can sometimes be more effective than escalating your response.This episode will help you better understand why your child's reactions can feel so sudden and intense, and how to respond in a way that keeps you grounded, holds your boundaries, and supports your child through those big feelings.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉Click HERE for my workshop, Be the Calm in Your Child's Storm: How to Keep Your Cool When Your Child Loses Theirs, to get the exact therapeutic interventions I use with my patients that can change the way your brain and body interprets your child's dysregulation to help you stay cool in the heat of the moment.
💥 Tired of constant battles with your child? Watch my ✨FREE✨ workshop, Overcoming Power Struggles, where I'll teach you the exact strategies I use in my clinical practice to help parents break free from the cycle of yelling, threats, and negotiations—and instead foster cooperation, connection, and calm. Just visitdrsarahbren.com/powerstruggles to get instant access to this workshop.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the difference between a tantrum and a meltdown
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 23 Apr 2026 - 23min - 413 - Divorce with less conflict: Co-parenting, emotion regulation, and supporting your kids with Katherine Miller
Katherine Miller, author of The Emotionally Savvy Divorce and collaborative law professional, joins me to talk about what it actually means to navigate divorce in a way that reduces conflict, supports your well-being, and protects your children.
Together, we explore:
The difference between reacting and responding, and how this shift can change the outcome of conflict. Why most divorce conflict is not actually about what you're fighting about, but what's underneath it. The concept of the "conflict trap" and why the same arguments repeat over and over. Simple strategies to pause in heated moments. How to communicate more effectively with a co-parent, even when they are not being collaborative. What collaborative divorce is and how it helps families reduce conflict and make more thoughtful decisions. Why "winning" in divorce often backfires, especially when children are involved. How to shift the dynamic with a high-conflict partner without escalating the situation.This conversation is not just about divorce. It's about learning how to use your emotions as information, stay grounded under pressure, and respond in ways that align with your long-term goals.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚 The Emotionally Savvy Divorce: Smart Negotiations for a Clean Break
📱 IG: @millerlaw_ny FB: Miller Law Group NY
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱 IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Navigating separation or divorce? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers specialized support at every stage of the process, including therapy and coaching, parenting and co-parenting support, family therapy, and weekly divorce groups for women and children. Whether you're in the middle of a split or adjusting to a new family structure, our team is here to help you and your children feel steady and supported. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more or schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the right support for your family.
🔗 International Academy of Collaborative Professionals
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about whether "nesting" during a divorce is better for your kids
Tue, 21 Apr 2026 - 51min - 412 - Q&A: When and how should I tell my child about his autism diagnosis?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...
Why many parents worry that using the word "autism" might make their child feel different or labeled, and how to think about that fear. What research and clinical experience suggest about telling your child sooner rather than later. How giving a diagnosis a name can actually feel empowering and help your child make sense of their experiences. What it looks like to take a neuroaffirming, strengths-based approach when talking about autism. How to explain autism to a young child in developmentally appropriate, non-pathologizing language.Why this doesn't have to be one big, serious conversation and how to follow your child's lead over time. The value of being the one who defines what autism means for your child, before the world does. Simple ways to normalize and support your child through representation, stories, and everyday conversations.This episode will help you understand how to talk about neurodiversity in a way that feels simple, affirming, and age-appropriate, so your child can better understand their brain, their strengths, and the ways they experience the world.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
🔗 Every child deserves to feel safe, understood, and supported, and every parent deserves a place to turn. At Upshur Bren Psychology Group, we offer a full continuum of autism services: diagnostic testing, individual therapy, and parent support groups for families raising children and young adults on the spectrum. Visit upshurbren.com or schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to learn more about support options for you and your child.
📚 Different Thinkers: Autism by Katia Fredriksen PhD and Yael Rothman PhD
📚 Wonderfully Wired Brains: An Introduction to the World of Neurodiversity
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 16 Apr 2026 - 24min - 411 - Doulas, birth plans, and anxiety: How to feel more confident and less overwhelmed in pregnancy and postpartum with Sarah Ludwig
I'm joined by doula, childbirth educator, and founder of Baby To Go, Sarah Ludwig, to talk about what it actually means to prepare for birth and why so many parents feel overwhelmed, anxious, or like they have to "get it right."
Together, we explore:
What a doula actually does and how they support families during pregnancy, labor, and postpartum. Why pregnancy can increase anxiety, and how to work with it instead of against it. The difference between what you can control and what you can't during birth. How to think about birth plans as flexible "preferences" rather than fixed outcomes. Why trying to control every detail can sometimes make anxiety worse. How to build confidence in your ability to cope, even when things don't go as planned. The role of postpartum planning and why it's often overlooked. How to recognize when anxiety is within a normal range and when it might need more support.Instead of focusing on creating the perfect plan, this conversation is about building your ability to cope with uncertainty and feel more confident in the process.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📱IG: @baby_to_go FB: Baby To Go
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Click HERE to sign up for my FREE workshop, Confident Parenting from the Start, to get tools and strategies that you can put into practice right away to challenge self-doubt, put an end to your panic-Googling, and finally find the ease and enjoyment in early parenthood!
👉 Click HERE to download my free interactive workbook, My Mental Health Postpartum Checklist, that will help you create a personalized mental health support system for yourself allowing you to feel more confident and relaxed, knowing you have a plan for whatever your unique postpartum experience may be.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about processing birth trauma with Dr. Sterling
Tue, 14 Apr 2026 - 54min - 410 - Q&A: What should I do when my toddler hits or pulls my hair?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...
Why the expectation that toddlers should already know how to regulate themselves is a common parenting myth. What's actually happening in a child's brain and body when their emotional "gas tank" is empty. Why your child's big reaction to a limit doesn't mean you've done something wrong. The difference between holding a boundary and trying to solve your child's feelings. What to do when your child's behavior is physically aggressive, like hitting or hair pulling. Why your own triggers matter and how understanding them can help you respond differently. The foundational factors (like sleep, fresh air, movement, and connection) that often drive behavior more than discipline strategies.If you've ever felt powerless, guilty, or overwhelmed in the face of your child's big emotions, this episode will help you zoom out, reset unrealistic expectations, and approach these moments with more clarity and compassion—for both your child and yourself.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what to do when your child is hitting
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to identify and manage your triggers with Dr. Amber Thornton
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 09 Apr 2026 - 24min - 409 - GLP-1s and parenting: Body image, food noise, and talking to your child about changes to your body with Dr. Rachel Goldman
GLP-1 medications like Ozempic and Wegovy are everywhere right now. But behind the headlines and social media debates are real people navigating complicated questions about body image, health, and how to talk about these changes with their families.
Clinical psychologist Dr. Rachel Goldman joins me to unpack the psychology behind GLP-1 medications, the concept of "food noise," and how parents can thoughtfully talk to their children about changes in their own bodies.
Together we explore:
Why obesity is now understood as a chronic, multifactorial disease rather than a simple issue of willpower. What "food noise" is and why GLP-1 medications can dramatically quiet the constant mental chatter around food. The biggest misconceptions about GLP-1 medications and why they're not simply "weight loss drugs." Why significant body changes can bring up complicated identity and emotional shifts. How parents can talk to kids about weight loss or body changes without reinforcing shame or diet culture. The difference between body positivity and body neutrality and why neutrality may be more realistic and helpful for many families. Small language shifts that help children focus on what their bodies do, rather than how they look. Why it's never too late for parents to shift the way they talk about bodies and health.This conversation will help you understand the science and psychology behind GLP-1 medications and give you practical tools and language to navigate your own health journey and talk about it with your kids in thoughtful, supportive ways.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚 When Life Happens: The Mindset Shift You Need to Manage Stress, Build Confidence, and Break Free
FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and parenting coaching to help you feel more grounded and confident as you support your child's emotional development and navigate challenges like body image, big emotions, anxiety, and family dynamics. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about youth sports and body image with Zoë Bisbing
Tue, 07 Apr 2026 - 47min - 408 - Q&A: Are time-ins better than time-outs?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...
What a time-in actually is and how it's different from a time-out. How to tell if your child's behavior is coming from dysregulation, a skill gap, or deliberate behavior. How to know which discipline tools will work best in each unique situation. The difference between co-regulating during a meltdown and teaching a behavioral boundary (and how to know when to use each). How to use time-outs as a teaching tool, not a punishment. How developmental stages affect behaviors like hitting, tantrums, and defiance—and what realistic expectations to set. Why trying to find the "perfect parenting script" often makes discipline harder. The one question to ask yourself that will help you decide what to do in the moment.If you've ever found yourself wondering whether you should comfort your child, correct the behavior, or step away entirely, this episode will help you zoom out, understand what's really going on underneath the behavior, and respond more intentionally.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
🔗 Longitudinal Relationship Between Time-Out and Child Emotional and Behavioral Functioning
👉 Feeling confused about discipline strategies like time-ins, time-outs, and consequences? Visit drsarahbren.com/timeout to download my ✨FREE✨ Discipline Guide to learn when and how to use these tools in a way that actually supports your child's development while reducing power struggles at home. This guide breaks down how to respond to common behaviors like tantrums, hitting, and defiance so you can feel more confident in the moment.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 02 Apr 2026 - 25min - 407 - Back by popular demand: Attachment theory and fostering secure attachment relationships
Let's revisit the foundation of raising securely attached kids! I'm bringing back one of my first ever episodes to help parents understand the basics of how a secure attachment bond impacts children's resilience, confidence, and overall well-being.
Tune in to hear:
What secure attachment is and how it plays a key role in nurturing a child's confidence, curiosity, and ability to handle life's ups and downs. The powerful influence of feeling safe and seen on a child's ability to be honest, adaptable, and resilient. Practical strategies for fostering secure attachment, no matter the age of your child. How attachment affects a child's development into a compassionate, kind individual who can build meaningful relationships throughout their life.This episode offers science-backed insights and actionable tips and is a must-listen for all parents!
INTERESTED IN LEARNING MORE ABOUT ATTACHMENT SCIENCE?
Click HERE to download my free guide, The Four Pillars of Fostering Secure Attachment, helping you parent with a focus on attunement and trust.
LEARN MORE ABOUT DR. SARAH:
FOLLOW DR. SARAH ON INSTAGRAM:
https://www.instagram.com/drsarahbren/
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Can my kid be securely attached to me if I'm insecurely attached in my adult relationships?
Tue, 31 Mar 2026 - 26min - 406 - Q&A: How do I handle sibling rivalry when my baby keeps touching my toddler's toys?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...
Whether it's developmentally realistic to expect a baby and a toddler to "work together" during play. If separating siblings in certain moments is helpful parenting… or something we're supposed to avoid. The concept of "territory" in child development and why young children often need spaces and projects that feel protected. Why pushing young children to share too early can sometimes make cooperation harder later on. How helping a toddler trust that their creations and belongings will be respected can actually reduce sibling rivalry over time. The difference between communal family spaces and personal spaces for kids' toys and projects. Simple ways to set boundaries that support both children's needs without turning every moment into a negotiation. Where kids actually learn to get along with siblings — so you can focus on the moments that matter and release some of the pressure around the rest.If you're parenting siblings close in age and feel like you're constantly refereeing fights over toys, this episode will help you better understand what's developmentally normal and give you practical ways to support both children without feeling like you have to force sharing or cooperation before they're ready.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to get your toddler to share
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 26 Mar 2026 - 14min - 405 - Why kids remember more when they write by hand: What screens might be costing your child's brain with Dr. Audrey van der Meer
Dr. Audrey van der Meer, developmental neuroscientist and Professor of Neuropsychology at NTNU, joins me to talk about what's happening inside our children's brains when they write by hand versus type on a keyboard and what the shift toward fully digital classrooms may be costing their learning, memory, and focus.
Together we explore:
What gross motor development is and why its sequential nature is so essential for a child's development. The research that illustrated that handwriting activates larger neural networks linked to memory, attention, and deeper learning compared to typing. Why taking notes by hand improves memory retention and comprehension. The "use it or lose it" principle of brain development and what that means for cognitive growth. What studies reveal about reading on paper versus reading on screens. How screens can be beneficial too, so you can make informed, intentional decisions about when to incorporate technology and when to set limits. Practical, realistic ways parents can strengthen brain development at home without banning screens or rejecting technology altogether.This conversation isn't about rejecting technology or going back to the Stone Age. It's about being intentional. And when we understand how the brain evolved to learn, we can make small shifts that serve to strengthen our children's development.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the hidden dangers of EdTech with Andy Liddell
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about parenting with the "whole-brain" with Dr. Dan Siegel
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about rewiring the way our kids interact with screens with Alé Duarte
Tue, 24 Mar 2026 - 1h 02min - 404 - Q&A: How can I teach my toddler to clean up their toys without power struggles?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
Why cleanup time can be surprisingly hard for young children. What's really happening in your toddler's brain and body when they are resisting transitions. Is repeating yourself over and over again a normal part of parenting young kids? And how do you know when it's part of the learning process versus something that needs a different approach? How motor planning, executive functioning, and task initiation can make something like "clean up your toys" feel overwhelming to a child. Why you might still be doing 90% of the cleanup work at this age (and why that can actually be part of the learning process.) Practical strategies to make cleanup easier, including breaking tasks into smaller steps, planning ahead for transitions, and using cues like songs and routines. How to shift your expectations so you can stay calm and connected instead of getting pulled into power struggles.If you find yourself repeating the same requests over and over while trying to stay patient and regulated, this episode will help you understand what's developmentally normal for young children and give you practical tools to make cleanup time and transitions feel more manageable for both you and your child.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
💥 Tired of constant battles with your child? Watch my ✨FREE✨ workshop, Overcoming Power Struggles, where I'll teach you the exact strategies I use in my clinical practice to help parents break free from the cycle of yelling, threats, and negotiations—and instead foster cooperation, connection, and calm. Just visit drsarahbren.com/powerstruggles to get instant access to this workshop.
ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 209. How can I get my toddler to share and play nicely with other kids?
🎧231. BTS: How can I build my toddler's assertiveness skills?
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 19 Mar 2026 - 25min - 403 - Secure attachment and dads: How fathers' inner worlds shape their parenting with Dr. Jett Stone
Dr. Jett Stone, clinical psychologist and author of Quiet Your Mind: A Men's Guide, joins me to talk about paternal mental health and the invisible emotional load modern fathers are carrying, many without language, models, or permission to talk about it.
Together we explore:
Why millennial dads often feel like they're parenting without a blueprint. How intergenerational patterns and "boyhood rules" shape the way men show up as fathers. Why so many dads feel like the "secondary parent" and how mothers can invite fathers in without diminishing their own needs or experiencing resentment. The tension between wanting authority and wanting connection with your child (and how to hold both). Why secure attachment with dads doesn't have to look exactly like secure attachment with moms. How doing your own reflective work as a parent can transform the entire family system.This conversation will help you understand the emotional lives of fathers with more compassion and clarity. Because when dads feel supported, included, and emotionally resourced, the whole family benefits.
Whether you're a parent, a partner, or a therapist working with families, this episode will expand the way you think about modern fatherhood.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Looking for extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and parent coaching for moms, dads, and families who want to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and support their child's development. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services or schedule a free 30-minute consultation to find the right support for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about fostering deep and meaningful relationships with Dr. Rick Hanson
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what it means to be a father with Kendall Smith
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about fostering a secure attachment relationship
Tue, 17 Mar 2026 - 57min - 402 - Q&A: Is letting my anxious child sleep in my bed helping or making their anxiety worse?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
Whether letting your anxious child sleep in your bed reinforces anxiety or supports emotional security. The difference between attachment needs and anxiety accommodations. Why distress tolerance and secure attachment are not competing goals. How SPACE (Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions) approaches sleep struggles. What it actually means to "stop an accommodation" — and why sleep isn't always the first place to start. How to know if your child can't sleep alone or simply prefers not to. Why bedtime feels so loaded for parents and how to zoom out and look at the bigger picture. The research on attachment (including why you don't have to get it right 100% of the time). How to reduce anxiety without damaging your relationship with your child.If your child struggles with separation anxiety at night, frequently climbs into your bed, or says he's too scared to sleep alone, this episode will help you step back from the all-or-nothing messaging and make a thoughtful, individualized decision that fits your family.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
😴 Struggling with toddler bedtime battles? Download my ✨FREE✨ Toddler Sleep Guide with 7 concrete strategies backed by peer-reviewed research and anecdotally tested in my own practice, that you can implement with your children today to turn your bedtime struggles into solutions.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about toddler sleep strategies
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 12 Mar 2026 - 26min - 401 - The dopamine trap: Why screens and ultra-processed foods keep kids wanting more (but never satisfied) with Michaeleen Doucleff
Michaeleen Doucleff, science journalist and author of Dopamine Kids, joins me to talk about what's really happening in our children's brains when it comes to screens, social media, and ultra-processed foods and why so many kids (and adults) feel stuck in cycles of constant wanting without real satisfaction.
Together we explore:
What dopamine actually does in the brain and why it's not simply the "pleasure chemical." How screens and ultra-processed foods are engineered to tap into our children's seeking systems. Why today's kids may be experiencing more craving and less true gratification. Why simply taking screens away often backfires and what to replace them with instead. How small, sustainable environmental shifts (not massive overhauls) can recalibrate your child's motivation system. Practical ways to reduce screen use in the evenings, during transitions, and "on the go." How involving your child in the process can increase autonomy, buy-in, and long-term success.This conversation isn't about fear, shame, or unrealistic detoxes. It's about understanding the science of motivation so we can make thoughtful changes that bring more color, pleasure, and peace back into our homes.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY ME:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
📚 Tiny Habits: The Small Changes That Change Everything by BJ Fogg, PhD
📄 Sign‐tracking modulates reward‐related neural activation to reward cues, but not reward feedback
🔗 Brick
👉 Whether it's screens, power struggles, reactivity, or habits that are hard to shift, it can be incredibly difficult to see and change these cycles on your own. Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers in-person and virtual therapy and parent coaching to help you create meaningful, lasting change. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services or schedule a free 30-minute consultation to find the right support for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
Tue, 10 Mar 2026 - 1h 05min - 400 - Q&A: Should I redshirt my child for kindergarten?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
What "kindergarten readiness" actually means (and what it doesn't). Dr. Upshur and Dr. Bren share their personal experiences - with one choosing to send her child to kindergarten and the other deciding to hold her son back - and why. The pros and cons of redshirting, and whether being one of the youngest in the class really leads to long-term struggles. Why social-emotional readiness may matter less than you think. How family logistics, finances, community norms, local school culture, and sibling dynamics can influence your decision. What research says about long-term academic and life outcomes. How to take the pressure off yourself so you can make a thoughtful, "good enough" choice.If you're going back and forth about whether to send your child to kindergarten or wait another year, wondering if they're too sensitive or overwhelmed to start, or worried about making the "wrong" decision, this episode will help you zoom out, gather the right information, and move forward with more clarity and confidence.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping your child success in preschool with Meredith Gary
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping your toddler learn to share
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 05 Mar 2026 - 18min - 399 - Parenting toddlers through power struggles: How to set limits, support independence, and reduce meltdowns with Devon Kuntzman
Devon Kuntzman, toddler expert and author of Transforming Toddlerhood, joins me to explain why the toddler years feel so intense and how understanding development can change everything.
Together we explore:
How toddlerhood is defined by contradictory needs for independence and attachment and why this creates so much emotional volatility. How rapid cognitive, motor, and language development can leave toddlers feeling disoriented and overwhelmed. How to slow down power struggles using developmentally informed tools like asking "What's your plan?" and turning "no" into "not yet." Why helping toddlers organize their thinking supports regulation, impulse control, and cooperation. How parents can stay flexible, grounded, and confident while navigating a stage that naturally pushes everyone's limits. How to grab your free spot in Devon's 9th Annual Transforming Toddlerhood Conference being held live virtually from March 11th-15th.This episode is designed to help parents make sense of toddler behavior through a developmental lens, reduce self-blame, and walk away with practical strategies for setting limits while still supporting independence, emotional growth, and secure attachment.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🔗 Reserve your FREE spot in the Transforming Toddlerhood Conference
FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
💥 Tired of constant battles with your child? Watch my ✨FREE✨ workshop, Overcoming Power Struggles, where I'll teach you the exact strategies I use in my clinical practice to help parents break free from the cycle of yelling, threats, and negotiations—and instead foster cooperation, connection, and calm. Just visit drsarahbren.com/powerstruggles to get instant access to this workshop.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 94. Toddler sleep: Why it's different than infant sleep and how to use the attachment relationship to help them fall asleep, with Eileen Henry
🎧 90. Seeing the world through your toddler's eyes: Helping your child feel seen, understood, and validated with the co-authors of the Terrific Toddlers series
🎧 209. How can I get my toddler to share and play nicely with other kids?
🎧231. BTS: How can I build my toddler's assertiveness skills?
Tue, 03 Mar 2026 - 38min - 398 - Q&A: Is it okay to have different rules for different kids in a blended family?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
- Whether it's okay to have different rules for different kids under the same roof in a blended family.
- How developmental differences and co-parenting agreements can shape household expectations.
- What to do when step-siblings notice (and protest) differences in discipline.
- How to align parenting styles in a blended family without creating resentment.
- Why transparency and age-appropriate conversations can actually strengthen family trust.
- How to approach your spouse when you feel protective, defensive, or out of sync.
If you're navigating parenting post-divorce in a blended family with different parenting plans and complex co-parenting relationships, struggling with fairness between step-siblings, or feeling unsure how to handle different rules in the same house, this episode offers clarity, nuance, and practical next steps.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉🏻 Navigating separation or divorce? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers specialized support at every stage of the process, including therapy and coaching, parenting and co-parenting support, family therapy, and weekly divorce groups for women and children. Whether you're in the middle of a split or adjusting to a new family structure, our team is here to help you and your children feel steady and supported. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more or schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the right support for your family.
ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about getting on the same page with your partner in parenthood
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 26 Feb 2026 - 17min - 397 - AI, algorithms, and social media: How to protect your child from digital harm and advocate for change with Imran Ahmed
Imran Ahmed, founder and CEO of the Center for Countering Digital Hate, joins me to talk about how social media platforms, algorithms, and AI systems are designed and what that means for our children's mental health and safety.
Together we explore:
How social media algorithms are built to maximize attention, and why emotionally extreme content is often amplified. What research reveals about how quickly self-harm and eating disorder content can be served to young users. How AI platforms can respond dangerously to vulnerable teens when guardrails are not properly in place. Why this is not just a "screen time" issue, but a systemic design and accountability issue. The difference between pulling the "emergency brake" and creating meaningful long-term change. What parents can realistically do at home to build digital resilience, foster trust, and partner with their children in navigating online spaces.This episode isn't meant to create more fear, but to offer greater clarity. My hope is that parents walk away feeling informed, empowered, and better equipped to both advocate for safer systems and strengthen the relationship that ultimately protects kids most: the one they have with you.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🔗Center for Countering Digital Hate
FOLLOW US ON SOCIAL MEDIA:
📱IG: @counterhate FB: Center for Countering Digital Hate Youtube: @CCDHate
📱IG: @drsarahbren Youtube: Securely Attached
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
💻 Protecting Kids Online - Download the guide for parents
🔗 Fake Friend: How ChatGPT betrays vulnerable teens by encouraging dangerous behavior
🔗 Resist and unsubscribe - Scott Galloway
👉 Parenting in the age of AI, algorithms, and constant connectivity can feel like a lot. If you're feeling unsure, reactive, or overwhelmed, Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and parent coaching to help you feel grounded, clear, and confident as you support your child and manage your own stress. Schedule a free 30-minute consultation or go to upshurbren.com to learn more and find the right support for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about secure attachment vs. social media with Dr. Miriam Steele
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the do's and don'ts for introducing screens to your toddler
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the hidden dangers of EdTech with Andy Liddell
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about rewiring the way our kids interact with screens with Alé Duarte
Tue, 24 Feb 2026 - 1h 04min - 396 - Q&A: My child was left out by her friends. Now what?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...
First things first, why are schools still sending out candy grams in this current climate with a loneliness epidemic on the rise? Cliques and posses that form in middle school are often rife with envy, jealousy, gossip, and temptation - how to help our kids navigate this. What advice to give your child when they are left out in a friend group. How to help a child who tends to avoid conflict in their interpersonal relationships build a greater tolerance for joining in and addressing things directly. "There is a difference between a kid who says 'I am going to let this go' vs. 'I am going to hold this in.'" Understanding "social currency" and how that impacts children, especially as they move into the stage of development where their attention begins to move away from their parents and much more heavily toward their peers.REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about talking with your teen with Elizabeth Bennett
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about respond to your child who you think is bullying other kids
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 19 Feb 2026 - 24min - 395 - PANS and PANDAS explained: Why some children develop sudden OCD, anxiety, or tics after illness with Dr. Nancy O'Hara
Dr. Nancy O'Hara, pediatrician and leading expert in PANS and PANDAS, joins me to unpack why some children experience sudden, dramatic changes in behavior, anxiety, OCD, tics, sleep, or emotional regulation following illness. For many families, these symptoms appear almost overnight and are often misdiagnosed as "just anxiety," behavioral issues, or psychiatric disorders, leaving parents confused, dismissed, and unsure how to help their child.
Together we explore:
What PANS and PANDAS are, and how infections like strep, viruses, or tick-borne illness can trigger sudden neuropsychiatric symptoms in children. What to assess to help you determine if your child has a generalized anxiety disorder or if it may be PANS/PANDAS that is the root cause of their symptoms. Why PANS/PANDAS is often missed or misunderstood in both medical and mental health settings. The three-pronged approach to treatment: Addressing the trigger, the immune system, and the child's emotional and behavioral symptoms. How therapy, both for parents and children, can support recovery, even when symptoms have a medical origin. Understanding that there is real hope for healing and that it's never too late to identify and address PANS or PANDAS.This episode is designed to help parents and clinicians feel more informed, less alone, and more confident in recognizing when a child's behavior may be signaling something deeper. PANS and PANDAS are real, treatable conditions that deserve compassionate, comprehensive care.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚Demystifying PANS/PANDAS: A Functional Medicine Desktop Reference on Basal Ganglia Encephalitis
🎧 Demystifying PANS/PANDAS Podcast
FOLLOW US ON SOCIAL MEDIA:
📱IG: @nhoharamd FB: Nancy O'Hara MD, MPH, FAAP
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Looking for support for a child struggling with anxiety or OCD? If your child is struggling with anxiety or OCD, Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers SPACE-based parent support through both a virtual group and individualized care. Go to upshurbren.com/space to learn more or book a free 30-minute consultation with our care team, who will listen carefully and help you determine the best support for your family.
🔗 Dr. O'Hara's mentor, Sidney M. Baker, MD
🔗 Susan Swedo, MD, who created the acronym and coined the terms of PANS and PANDAS
📚 Super Sam and the Battle Against PANS/PANDAS by Dr. Lindsey Wells
🔗 Practitioner directories and community support: Aspire and Look Foundation
🔗 For practitioners: PANDAS Physicians Network
🔗 A helpful resource you can bring to your pediatrician: The Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry - February 2017
🔗 The Medical Academy of Pediatrics and Special Needs
🔗 Ilads
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to handle potty regressions in your older child?
Tue, 17 Feb 2026 - 51min - 394 - Q&A: How can I encourage sibling empathy without making them responsible for each other's feelings?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
The subtle but important difference between encouraging empathy and unintentionally parentifying a child. What reflective functioning is and why helping your child develop this skill may be one of the most important things you can do as a parent. What helps empathy develop naturally in children without pressure or responsibility. Ways to navigate mismatched messages from extended family while staying grounded in your own parenting values. What parents can do to foster healthy sibling dynamics.If you have ever worried about asking too much of your older child, felt activated by comments about siblings taking care of each other, or wondered how to support healthy sibling relationships without repeating old patterns, this episode offers clarity, nuance, and a calmer way forward.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about sibling rivalry and jealousy
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about breaking the cycle of insecure attachment with Dr. Miriam Steele
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or
Thu, 12 Feb 2026 - 19min - 393 - Why parenting can shake up your marriage: How to fight better, repair faster, and stay connected with Eli Weinstein
Eli Weinstein, couples therapist and author of the upcoming book From I Do to We Do: Navigating Marriage in Parenting Years, joins me to talk about what really happens to a relationship after kids.
Together we explore:
- Why parenthood doesn't just add stress, it reactivates attachment patterns and old wounds in both partners.
- What's really happening when you keep having the same fight on repeat, and how to begin spotting the deeper need beneath it.
- How mental load, feeling unseen, and constant "downloading" logistics quietly erode connection and build resentment.
- The difference between "we made up" and actually repairing what keeps breaking.
- How couples get stuck in "gridlock arguments" and what helps uncover what's really driving the conflict.
- The role overstimulation and nervous system overload play in reactivity at home.
- Practical ways couples can reset and regrow in this new season, without waiting for more time, sleep, or perfect circumstances
This episode is designed to help you feel less alone in the mess of marriage after kids, and more confident about what actually helps couples stay connected, communicate better, and find their way back to each other.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚From I Do to We Do: Navigating Marriage in the Parenting Years
FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
🔗 Want to learn more about therapy and coaching resources at Upshur Bren Psychology Group? Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services for individuals, couples, parents and kids and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
Tue, 10 Feb 2026 - 49min - 392 - Q&A: Can you spoil a toddler by holding them too much?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
- Why so many parents start questioning their instincts around holding and comforting as their baby becomes a toddler.
- How to tell when your child truly needs comfort versus when they may be ready for a small, supportive stretch.
- What increased clinginess may be communicating and how decoding the root cause can guide what to do next.
- Why soothing and physical closeness do not undermine independence and often play a key role in helping it develop.
- How to move away from rigid parenting rules and make moment-to-moment decisions rooted in attunement and nervous system cues.
- What it looks like to honor your own limits without making your child feel unsafe, rejected, or "too much."
If you have ever wondered whether you are helping or hurting your child by picking them up, holding them, or setting boundaries around your availability, this episode will help you navigate those moments with more confidence.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about toddler sleep with Eileen Henry
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 05 Feb 2026 - 20min - 391 - Why good moms feel bad (and how to stop letting your emotions run the show) with Rebecca Geshuri
Rebecca Geshuri, therapist and co-author of the new book When Good Moms Feel Bad joins me to talk about why so many "good moms" still feel overwhelmed, reactive, or stuck in cycles of guilt, anger, and self-criticism.
Together we explore:
- Drawing from Internal Family Systems (IFS) Rebecca breaks down what "parts work" is and how understanding your inner parts can reduce reactivity and shame.
- How polarization between "what my child needs" and "what I need" fuels burnout and emotional overwhelm.
- Why parenting feels hardest when younger, protective parts take over.
- What the "inner mom" is and how learning to access this part of yourself builds calm, confidence, and connection.
- A simple framework to slow down in triggering moments and respond with more compassion.
- How self-compassion and nervous system awareness support secure attachment — for both you and your child.
If you've been feeling overwhelmed and burnt out in parenthood, this episode offers validation, language for what you're experiencing, and practical tools to help you feel more grounded, regulated, and connected.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
🔗 Want to learn more about therapy and coaching resources at Upshur Bren Psychology Group? Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the science of mom-rage Diana Winston
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the science of energy healing with Stephanie Filardi
Tue, 03 Feb 2026 - 53min - 390 - Q&A: What is body doubling and how can it help my child with ADHD focus?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
- What body doubling actually is and why your child may focus better simply because someone is nearby.
- Why getting started on tasks (homework, getting dressed, chores) is often harder than the task itself for kids with ADHD.
- How to be intentional about helping reduce procrastination, distraction, and emotional overwhelm for your child.
- How to use body doubling in ways that build independence over time, instead of creating power struggles or burnout.
- Real-life, low-effort examples of body doubling that don't require special systems, tutors, or more on your plate.
If your child struggles to get started, loses focus easily, or can only seem to work when someone is sitting with them, this episode offers a strategy to support them in a way that feels sustainable and actually works.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉🏻 Interested in learning more about Upshur Bren Psychology Group's Parenting Your Child with ADHD 8-week virtual workshop series to empower parents of children, adolescents, and young adults with ADHD? Go to upshurbren.com/group-adhd or schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to learn more.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 29 Jan 2026 - 20min - 389 - Orchid and dandelion children: How sensitivity shapes children's health, behavior, and resilience with Dr. W. Thomas Boyce
Dr. W. Thomas Boyce, author of The Orchid and the Dandelion, joins me to talk about why some children are biologically more sensitive to their environments and how that sensitivity can become either a challenge or a powerful strength.
Together we explore:
- What it means to have either an orchid or a dandelion child and why this exists on a spectrum rather than as a strict either-or.
- Why sensitive children often struggle the most in stressful environments and thrive the most in supportive ones.
- How nervous system reactivity and regulation show up differently across kids and what that means for how you parent.
- The difference between sensitivity and fragility and why sensitive kids can be incredibly resilient when the right supports are in place.
- How parents can support orchid children without overprotecting or pushing them too hard.
This episode is designed to help parents better understand their child's sensitivity, feel less afraid of getting it wrong, and walk away with a clearer sense of how to support their child in a way that builds resilience, confidence, and long-term emotional health.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Want to get my research-backed framework for increasing cooperation and emotion regulation skills in your sensitive child? Check out Parenting by Design, my guided program to help you parent your unique child in a way that increases cooperation, defuses power struggles, and rebuilds their trust in your authority–all while supporting your child's mental health and your own.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about parenting a sensitive, "spicy," highly emotional child
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about temperament and personality with Dr. Koraly Pérez-Edgar
Tue, 27 Jan 2026 - 55min - 388 - Q&A: How can I support my child who struggles with perfectionism?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
- How to understand what is really happening when a young child becomes intensely frustrated or self critical.
- Why perfectionistic behaviors in early childhood are often developmentally normal and when they may begin to impact confidence or emotional well being.
- What to do in the moment when your child is dysregulated and why reassurance, praise, or growth mindset language often does not land when emotions are running high.
- How staying curious about your child's negative self talk can actually support resilience and self awareness over time.
- Ways to protect your child's inner voice and self esteem without trying to rush her out of uncomfortable feelings.
If your child gets stuck in frustration, takes mistakes personally, or is hard on themself, this episode will help you learn how to support their long term emotional growth.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode: Self-compassion, critical thinking, and connection: What the research reveals about raising capable kids with Melinda Wenner Moyer
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode: Secure attachment and growth mindset: The science behind raising well-adjusted kids with Melinda Wenner Moyer
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode: Helping sensitive kids build self-esteem and get out of a cycle of self-criticism with Dr. Blaise Aguirre
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode: Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions (SPACE) with Dr. Eli Lebowitz
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 22 Jan 2026 - 21min - 387 - Why mothers need to be held too: Somatic work and the circle of nurture with Lisa Rombach
Somatic practitioner and founder of Circle of Nurture, Lisa Rombach, joins me for a deeply grounding conversation about motherhood, the nervous system, and why mothers need support just as much as the children they care for.
Together, we explore:
- What somatic work actually is, in everyday language, and why it's not as abstract as it may sound.
- How motherhood changes our relationship with our bodies and sense of self.
- Why self-care often falls short and what truly helps mothers feel replenished.
- The role of community, presence, and being witnessed in reducing burnout.
- How being held and supported as a mother quietly shapes how our children feel safe and secure.
This episode will help mothers feel less alone, more understood, and more grounded in their own experience. You don't need to fix yourself or try harder, sometimes the most powerful shift comes from being supported and held.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🔗 Register for Lisa's live master class: Mother Glue
🔗 Join the next online Mother's Circle
FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
🔗 Feeling weighed down by mom-guilt, identity shifts, or the mental load of parenting? Upshur Bren Psychology Group specializes in maternal mental health and offers therapy and coaching to help you feel more grounded and supported. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more about support options or schedule a free consultation call so we can share recommendations for a personalized plan to meet your unique needs.
🔗 Somatic Experiencing (SE™) from Dr. Peter A. Levine
🔗 Mother Circle: Mothering through adoption
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my episode on parental burnout: What it is, why it happens, and how to overcome it
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the science of energy healing with Stephanie Filardi
Tue, 20 Jan 2026 - 54min - 386 - Q&A: What should I do when my child lies?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
- Whether lying is a normal part of child development or a sign of a deeper issue.
- What kids are actually trying to solve when they lie and how understanding that can change the way we respond as parents.
- How lying can function as a stress response, similar to fight, flight, or freeze, especially for kids with still-developing executive functioning skills.
- Why pushing for confessions, lectures, or punishments often backfires, leading to more power struggles and less honesty — and what to say in the moment instead.
- How to teach honesty over time without making your child feel unsafe bringing you the big stuff later on.
If your child has started lying and you find yourself wondering whether this is "normal," whether you should be worried, or how to handle it without condoning the behavior, this episode will help you respond with more calm, clarity, and confidence.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
🗞️ Fight, Flight, Freeze… or Fib?
ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about whether encouraging imagination will lead to lying in the future
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about getting your child to cooperate without using threats
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 15 Jan 2026 - 27min - 385 - How to build a family culture of play: Raising self-directed kids who play independently with Lizzie Assa
Independent play expert Lizzie Assa is back on Securely Attached to talk about how play is one of the most powerful ways children can build confidence, creativity, frustration tolerance, and resilience (while parents get a little breathing room back too.)
Together we explore:
- What independent play actually looks like for kids of all ages and what is realistic at each stage.
- Why independent play does not just happen, and how parents can teach it without guilt or power struggles.
- How to create simple "play pockets" in your home that make independent play more likely.
- Signs your child may have too many toys and why toy overload can shut play down.
- Specific phrases, routines, and timing cues that make independent play more successful.
- How to decode what your child's play reveals about their emotional experience and where they might need extra support.
- How independent play might look different for only children versus those playing with siblings.
This episode is designed to leave you with specific ideas you can put into practice immediately, from how to set up play to what to say when you step back, so independent play becomes something that actually works in your day-to-day life.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🔗 Substack - The Workplace for Children
📚 But I'm Bored!: Discover the Power of Independent Play to Raise Confident, Resilient Kids
🎧 Listen to Lizzie's first interview on the Securely Attached podcast
FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉 Want games specifically designed for fostering emotion regulation? Go to drsarahbren.com/games to get my free guide packed with games you can play with kids of all ages!
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the best toys to encourage independent play
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about whether fun is the antidote to burnout with Mike Rucker
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode answering if there is a wrong way to encourage independent play
Tue, 13 Jan 2026 - 56min - 384 - Q&A: How can I teach my sensitive child to cope with teasing?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
- Why some children are more sensitive to teasing, how temperament plays a role, and why those kids are often more likely to be targeted by peers.
- How all three hosts, as therapists and parents of sensitive boys, handle teasing and social stress with their own children, including what has helped and what we had to learn the hard way.
- What kids mean when they talk about "rage baiting," how this behavior shows up in friendships, and why it is especially dysregulating for sensitive children.
- Whether a "toughen up" approach ever helps sensitive kids, and what Dr. Sarah learned when her husband's advice to their son worked better than her own.
- How children can learn coping skills for teasing, including when to walk away, when it might be okay to engage, and how to tell the difference.
If your child takes teasing to heart and you worry about how to help without minimizing their feelings, this episode will help you support your sensitive child with more confidence, clarity, and connection.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want extra support in your parenting journey? Upshur Bren Psychology Group offers therapy and coaching to give parents the tools to feel more grounded and confident as they navigate parenthood and learn how to most effectively support their child. Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about raising sensitive, "spicy," or highly emotional children
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about navigating peer rejection in early adolescence
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 08 Jan 2026 - 29min - 383 - Reclaiming your focus: Distraction, screen time, and becoming more present with Nir Eyal
Author of Indistractable, Nir Eyal, is here to reshape the way we think about attention, willpower, and the forces that pull our minds in a thousand different directions.
Together we explore:
- The surprising science showing that internal triggers (not technology) drive most of our daily distractions.
- How stress, boredom, overwhelm, and discomfort quietly shape our habits (and our kids').
- Nir's simple 4-step framework for becoming "indistractable."
- What parents can do to model healthy tech habits without constant nagging, power struggles, or guilt.
- How to help kids build executive functioning skills like focus, follow-through, and frustration tolerance.
- A scheduling hack families can use to reduce battles and increase connection.
- The small mindset shifts that turn everyday moments of distraction into opportunities for growth.
If you've ever found yourself checking your phone without thinking, losing time to endless tasks, struggling to stay present with your child, or worrying about how screens are affecting your family, this episode offers clarity, practical tools, and a completely new way to approach focus and intentionality — for both you and your kids.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🔗 Nir Eyal
📚 Indistractable: How to Control Your Attention and Choose Your Life
📚 Hooked: How to Build Habit-Forming Products
FOLLOW US ON SOCIAL MEDIA:
📱X: @nireyal & LinkedIn: Nir Eyal
📱IG: @drsarahbren
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
👉🏻 Are you interested in exploring executive functioning supports? At Upshur Bren Psychology Group we offer a wide range of options, including in-person services for kids who live locally and virtual coaching support for those nationally. SCHEDULE A FREE CALL to learn more about the available resources for your unique needs.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to be intentional with your tech use with Catherine Price
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the best response to kids who constantly say, "I'm bored"?
Tue, 06 Jan 2026 - 59min - 382 - Q&A: Is it normal for my toddler to want to wear the same outfit every day?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
- Why toddlers often get intensely attached to a single outfit and why this kind of rigidity is usually a totally normal part of development.
- How to understand the difference between a sensory preference, a sensory processing challenge, and everyday toddler stubbornness.
- What "system load" is and why kids become more rigid when they are navigating stress, transitions, or big developmental leaps.
- How to reduce morning battles by planning ahead, building flexibility skills, and getting curious about what is really driving your child's resistance.
- What to do on the days when nothing works, including how to ride out meltdowns with less guilt and more grounded presence.
If you are struggling with daily clothing standoffs or wondering whether your child's rigidity means something is wrong, this episode will help you make sense of what is developmentally typical, when to consider sensory support, and how to navigate tough moments with more confidence and clarity.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
💥 Tired of constant battles with your child? Watch my ✨FREE✨ workshop, Overcoming Power Struggles, where I'll teach you the exact strategies I use in my clinical practice to help parents break free from the cycle of yelling, threats, and negotiations—and instead foster cooperation, connection, and calm. Just visit drsarahbren.com/powerstruggles to get instant access to this workshop.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about understanding your toddler with Devon Kuntzman
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode on how to mindfully parent a threenager
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode on strengthening your child's distress tolerance
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 01 Jan 2026 - 26min - 381 - Mom guilt, good guilt, and letting go: How to tell when guilt is helping you (and when it's holding you back) with Dr. Saumya Dave
Dr. Saumya Dave, psychiatrist, mental health advocate, and author of the new novel The Guilt Pill, joins me this week for a conversation about the emotional load so many mothers carry that can shape our choices, our identity, and even how we see ourselves as parents.
Together we explore:
- The surprising truth that guilt isn't always bad and how to recognize when it's actually trying to tell you something important.
- How cultural expectations and "good girl" conditioning quietly shape the way mothers judge themselves, often without realizing it.
- What happens when we try to shut off difficult emotions, and why numbing guilt can create more challenges than it solves.
- Why Dr. Saumya chose fiction to explore the emotional undercurrents of motherhood and how storytelling reveals truths we rarely say out loud.
- What kids learn from the way we relate to guilt and how parents can model a healthier, more grounded approach.
- Small shifts that can loosen guilt's grip and help you reconnect with the messy, joyful moments right in front of you.
If you've ever felt weighed down by the pressure to be a "perfect" parent, struggled with the inner critic that tells you you're not doing enough, or simply want a deeper understanding of where mom guilt comes from and how to soften its impact, this episode will give you clarity, validation, and tools to support your emotional wellbeing.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚 The Guilt Pill: A Psychological Thriller of Motherhood and Ambition
FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
🔗 Feeling weighed down by mom-guilt, identity shifts, or the mental load of parenting? Upshur Bren Psychology Group specializes in maternal mental health and offers therapy and coaching to help you feel more grounded and supported. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more about support options or schedule a free consultation call so we can share recommendations for a personalized plan to meet your unique needs.
📚 To Have and to Hold: Motherhood, Marriage, and the Modern Dilemma
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode fighting against the pressure to be perfect with Gayane Aramyan
Tue, 30 Dec 2025 - 38min - 380 - Q&A: I'm worried no one will come to my child's birthday party. What do I do?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Rebecca Hershberg and I talk about...
- Why the fear that no one will come to your child's birthday party feels so intense for parents and why that reaction is rooted in real neuroscience.
- Ways to ground yourself so you can support your child with clarity instead of panic.
- Strategies for planning a birthday celebration that feels safe, joyful, and truly right for your child, whether that means a small gathering, a special outing, or something completely different.
- How to partner with teachers, other parents, and your community to help your child form more meaningful connections.
- What to do if disappointment still happens and how to validate your child's feelings without getting stuck in them.
If you are worried about your child feeling left out, this episode will help you navigate those moments with more confidence so you can show up with grounded support and help your child feel understood and connected.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
🎧 Why birthdays are so hard for your kid and what parents can do about it
🎧 Listen to my podcast interview with Dr. Yael Schonbrun
👉🏻Why the brain registers the pain of social rejection the same way as physical pain
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to handle peer rejection in toddlerhood
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about peer rejection in early adolescence
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 25 Dec 2025 - 18min - 379 - Is America's achievement culture fueling a mental health crisis in our kids? With Dr. Doug Bolton
Clinical psychologist, educational leader, and author of Untethered: Creating Connected Families, Schools and Communities to Raise a Resilient Generation, Dr. Doug Bolton, joins me this week to unpack the rising levels of anxiety, burnout, and overwhelm we're seeing in kids today.
Together we explore:
- How changes in education starting in the 90s have intensified academic pressure for kids of all ages.
- Why school avoidance, perfectionism, and burnout are rising, even among high-achieving students.
- The neuroscience behind why rigor, overscheduling, and constant output make it harder for kids to access curiosity, regulation, and real learning.
- How expectations have shifted, and why many kids simply aren't developmentally ready for what schools now demand.
- Realistic, achievable ways to build rest, connection, and resilience into daily family life.
- Small shifts parents can make at home to buffer their child's stress, protect their mental health, and restore balance.
If your child is melting down after school, anxious about grades, overwhelmed by homework, or feeling weighed down by pressure to perform, this episode will help you understand what's really going on beneath the surface and give you practical tools to support their wellbeing.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚Untethered: Creating Connected Families, Schools, and Communities to Raise a Resilient Generation
FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
🔗 If your child is feeling overwhelmed by school demands, struggling with executive functioning, or showing signs of anxiety or burnout, you don't have to navigate this alone. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more about our therapy and coaching services designed to help kids and families move through these challenges with clarity and support.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about helping your child feel less academic pressure
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to handle school refusal
🎧 Listen to podcast episode about the myths of learning styles with Dr. Dan Willingham
Tue, 23 Dec 2025 - 59min - 378 - Q&A: How do I get my 3-year-old to stop crying over everything?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
- What is actually happening when your toddler cries over every little thing, from dropped toys to leaving the playground.
- Why saying "don't cry" often backfires, and what actually helps shorten the crying instead.
- The simple validation strategy that calms big feelings faster, even when every part of you wants the tears to stop.
- How to model emotional regulation by moving forward without ignoring your child or shutting their feelings down.
- When to offer empathy, when to add a little distraction (and why the order you do this really matters!) for helping toddlers build resilience.
If your child seems to dissolve into tears at the smallest frustration, this episode will help you understand the developmental reasons behind all that emotion and give you practical, real-world tools for supporting their feelings while still keeping your day moving.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
👉 Want games specifically designed for fostering emotion regulation? Go to drsarahbren.com/games to get my free guide packed with games you can play with kids of all ages!
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧Listen to my podcast episode about understanding toddlerhood with Devon Kuntzman
🎧Listen to my podcast episode about supporting your toddler's sleep with Eileen Henry
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 18 Dec 2025 - 16min - 377 - Settling your unsettled baby: How to read your child's cues, build routines, and trust your instincts with pediatrician Dr. Golly
Pediatrician and bestselling author Dr. Golly (aka Dr. Daniel Golshevsky) joins me this week to help new parents make sense of the early weeks with a newborn and feel more grounded, confident, and connected along the way.
Together we explore:
- How to understand newborn behavior and cues so you can respond with more confidence.
- What really matters in the first four weeks — and what you can let go of.
- Why some babies struggle to settle, and how to support their developing nervous system.
- How to create flexible, supportive routines without slipping into rigidity or pressure.
- The powerful role of partners and non-breastfeeding caregivers in bonding and soothing.
- How parents can tune out the noise, trust their instincts, and feel less overwhelmed by conflicting advice.
Whether you're navigating confusing cues, unpredictable sleep, feeding challenges, colic, or the general overwhelm of early parenthood, this episode offers clarity and reassurance during one of the most intense transitions of your life.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🔗Learn more about Dr. Golly and use code securelyattachedVIP15 for 15% off all Dr Golly courses at www.drgolly.com
🔗Get Dr. Golly's free Sleeping Tips checklists
📚Your Baby Doesn't Come with a Book: Dr Golly's Guide to the First Four Weeks of Parenthood
📚Dr Golly's Guide to Family Illness: Sneezes, Wheezes and Common Diseases
📚Our Baby, Our Baby, What Do You Need?: A Dr Golly Lift-the-Flap book
📚Our Baby, Our Baby, What Did You Say?: A Dr Golly Lift-the-Flap book
FOLLOW US ON SOCIAL MEDIA:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
🔗 Go to drsarahbren.com/secure to download my free guide, The Four Pillars of Fostering Secure Attachment, helping you parent with a focus on attunement and trust.
WANT TO TAKE YOUR LEARNING EVEN FURTHER?
Join me in The Authentic Parent, my comprehensive self-paced course that takes my workshop to the next level and teaches you everything you need to know (that no one tells you ahead of time) for how to confidently move through your first year of parenthood.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about lightening the load in pregnancy and parenthood with Dr. Sterling
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about movement in pregnancy and postpartum with Dr. Megan Roche
Tue, 16 Dec 2025 - 53min - 376 - Q&A: How to know if group therapy would be a good fit for my child?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
- What actually happens in a group therapy session for kids and how it differs from one-on-one therapy.
- How group therapy can help children practice social skills, build confidence, and feel less alone in their struggles.
- The fears many parents have about group therapy, including concerns about negative peer influence, comparison, or awkwardness.
- The different types of groups therapists run, including skills-based groups, process groups, and hybrid formats, and how to know which one fits your child best.
- Why peer support can be uniquely powerful for kids with anxiety or low self-esteem and how group leaders create a safe, supportive environment.
- What to ask a group leader before signing up so you can feel confident it will be the right match for your child.
If you've been curious whether group therapy might help your child feel supported, connected, and more capable in whatever challenges they are facing, this episode will give you a clear picture of what group work really looks like and how to decide if it could be a good fit for your kid.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
🔗 Want to learn more about group therapy and coaching resources at Upshur Bren Psychology Group? Visit upshurbren.com to explore our services and schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to find the support that's right for your family.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the different forms of therapy with Dr. Katie C. Lewis
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the difference between executive function coaching and tutoring
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 11 Dec 2025 - 21min - 375 - Breath-holding spells in children: What's normal, what's not, and how to stay calm with pediatrician Dr. Caity Gilman
Pediatrician Dr. Caity Gilman joins me this week to unpack breath-holding spells, those frightening moments when a child turns blue or pale, goes limp, or briefly loses consciousness during intense emotion or dysregulation or pain.
Together we explore:
- The two types of breath-holding spells and what triggers each of them.
- Are certain children more prone to these episodes based on genetics, temperament, or other factors?
- What should parents do in the moment to keep their child safe, and how to know when it's time to call their pediatrician.
- What parents can do after a spell to comfort their child.
- Do these spells cause any long-term harm, or are they truly benign?
- How to support your child's emotion regulation and frustration tolerance between episodes.
If you're currently navigating breath-holding spells, or you simply want to feel more prepared for the unexpected moments that come with raising little ones, this episode offers clarity, reassurance, and practical guidance from both a pediatrician and a fellow parent who has lived this experience firsthand.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🎧 Listen to Caity's first episode about vaccine safety
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
📱 @drsarahbren
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about what to do if your child is afraid of going to the doctor
Tue, 09 Dec 2025 - 31min - 374 - Q&A: How do I start making meaningful holiday traditions with my kids when all they want is presents?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
- How to start holiday traditions when you have a toddler and a new baby (without adding more pressure and stress to your plate!)
- Setting realistic expectations so you don't feel disappointed if the picture in your head and the reality with your kids look very different.
- How to stay flexible as your kids grow, their interests change, and your family evolves.
- Why kids often latch onto those unexpected and unplanned moments of joy and togetherness - and how realizing this can help take some of the pressure off parents.
- Simple ways to create meaningful holiday rituals, avoid overwhelm, and set a tone of joy, connection, and calm for your family this season.
Whether you're navigating multiple holidays, trying to balance gifts with meaning, or simply hoping to make this season feel special (without losing your mind), this episode will help you build traditions that truly fit your family and remind you that the magic often comes from doing less, not more.
ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to keep your child from becoming spoiled
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how kids can get dysregulated from excitement too
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 04 Dec 2025 - 29min - 373 - The psychology of autonomy and growth: Building stress tolerance, confidence, and motivation with Dr. William Stixrud and Ned Johnson
Joining me this week are Dr. William Stixrud and Ned Johnson, co-authors of the bestselling book The Self-Driven Child and leading experts on the neuroscience of stress, motivation, and autonomy.
Together we explore:
- Why a child's sense of control is one of the strongest predictors of resilience, mental health, and stress tolerance.
- How play, rest, and unstructured time uniquely support healthy brain development.
- The hidden ways over-scheduling, overstimulation, and constant "fixing" can unintentionally increase anxiety.
- What it really means to be a "non-anxious presence" — and how your calm helps regulate your child's nervous system.
- How to give kids space to struggle, experiment, and try hard things without overwhelming them or abandoning them.
- Practical, research-backed strategies for helping kids feel both safe and capable in a world that often feels anything but.
Whether you're raising a toddler or a teen, this conversation offers a grounded, science-backed reframe for understanding stress, resilience, and autonomy — and meaningful tools you can start using today to strengthen connection and help your child thrive.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUESTS:
🔗 https://theselfdrivenchild.com/
🎧 The Self-Driven Child Podcast
📚 The Self-Driven Child: The Science and Sense of Giving Your Kids More Control Over Their Lives
📚 The Seven Principles for Raising a Self-Driven Child: A Workbook
📚 What Do You Say?: How to Talk with Kids to Build Motivation, Stress Tolerance, and a Happy Home
FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
🔗 Learned Helplessness at Fifty: Insights from Neuroscience
🔗 Rest Is Not Idleness: Implications of the Brain's Default Mode for Human Development and Education
🔗 A Social-Cognitive Approach to Motivation and Personality
📚 The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Is Causing an Epidemic of Mental Illness
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast about how RIE can evolve into lifelong respectful parenting with Janet Lansbury
Tue, 02 Dec 2025 - 58min - 372 - Q&A: Is it normal for my toddler to constantly say they're sorry for everything?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
- If it's normal for a toddlers to say "I'm sorry" constantly, even when they haven't done anything wrong.
- Breaking down child development: How repetition and "theory of mind" shape early empathy and build social awareness.
- How to know when frequent apologizing is just a normal developmental phase (and when it might signal something more).
- The subtle ways parents can unintentionally reinforce this habit (and some phrases and actions to try instead.)
- How to respond to your child in the moment to build confidence, connection, and emotional understanding.
If your little one apologizes for every stubbed toe, sibling squabble, or frustrated sigh, this episode will help you understand what's really going on and how to gently guide them toward more accurate empathy, without worry or overcorrection.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
📚 Want practical tools to help your child learn to manage big feelings? Go to drsarahbren.com/games to download my free guide, Strengthen Your Child's Emotion Regulation Skills Through Play. It's a resource packed with simple, fun games you can play with your child to strengthen their ability to recognize, express, and regulate their emotions.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧Listen to my podcast episode about understanding toddlerhood with Devon Kuntzman
🎧Listen to my podcast episode about supporting your toddler's sleep with Eileen Henry
🎧Listen to my podcast episode about how not to raise a people pleaser
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 27 Nov 2025 - 14min - 371 - A simple parenting strategy with a big impact on kids' self-regulation, attention, and creativity, with somatic therapist Alé Duarte
Alé Duarte, somatic therapist and creator of KidSoma joins me this week to explore how tuning into your child's natural rhythms can completely transform the way you understand their emotions and reactions.
Together we unpack:
- Why play isn't a break from learning, it is the learning.
- What it means to help your child "complete a cycle" so their nervous system can settle and grow.
- How "unfinished cycles" can leave kids dysregulated, impulsive, or anxious—and what parents can do to help their child complete these cycles in daily life.
- Realistic ways to implement these strategies even when you're juggling busy schedules, time pressures, and the realities of everyday parenting.
- Why slowing down and following your child's lead can actually make mornings smoother, transitions easier, and connection deeper.
If you've ever wished you could understand what's happening underneath your child's big emotions and find a calmer rhythm for your entire family system, this conversation will change the way you see play, presence, and parenting.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🔗 Kid Soma
FOLLOW US ON SOCIAL MEDIA:
📱IG: @aleduarte_international YouTube: @aleduartetube
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
🔗 What is Somatic Experiencing?
👉 Want games specifically designed for fostering emotion regulation? Go to drsarahbren.com/games to get my free guide packed with games you can play with kids of all ages!
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about choosing between play therapy for kids and parenting support
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about the benefits of mindfulness
Tue, 25 Nov 2025 - 1h 04min - 370 - Q&A: What can I do if my child is reading below grade level, but is resistant to tutoring?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
- Why kids often say "this is boring" when something actually feels too hard or frustrating.
- How to tell whether your child's struggle with schoolwork might be about motivation, confidence, or a deeper learning challenge.
- What to do when tutoring or extra practice starts leading to power struggles or resistance.
- The pros and cons of reward systems, and how to use incentives in a way that truly motivates your child (without creating more stress).
- When to consider a school-based or private evaluation—and how to know which supports will make the biggest difference for your child's unique struggles.
If your child has started saying they "hate school" or "reading is boring" this episode will help you understand what's really driving that resistance and give you practical, compassionate ways to make learning feel lighter, more motivating, and even fun again.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
🔗 Learn about the Orton-Gillingham approach to reading for those with dyslexia
👉 If you're starting to wonder whether your child's challenges with learning might be more than a motivation issue, our Neuropsychological Testing services can help. Visit https://upshurbren.com/neuropsychological-testing to learn how we assess and support children with learning differences, or schedule a free call to talk through what resources might be right for your child.
ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧Listen to my podcast episode about the difference between tutoring and executive functioning skills
🎧Listen to my podcast episode about the best response for when your child says "I'm bored"
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 20 Nov 2025 - 21min - 369 - Millennial Menopause: What every woman needs to know about perimenopause, hormones, and mental health with Lauren A. Tetenbaum
Joining me this week is therapist and the author of the new book Millennial Menopause: Preparing for Perimenopause, Menopause, and Life's Next Period, Lauren A. Tetenbaum.
Together we explore:
- The perimenopause symptoms that often begin in your 30s and 40s, long before your period stops.
- How hormonal changes affect your mood, identity, relationships, and sense of self — and why understanding this can be profoundly grounding.
- Why perimenopause isn't just a "women's issue," but a family and cultural one, impacting partners, kids, and the emotional climate of a home.
- How to talk to your kids (yes, including your sons!) about menstruation, menopause, and the full arc of reproductive life in ways that reduce shame and build empathy.
- Practical strategies for navigating this transition, including how to advocate for yourself with healthcare providers, what kinds of support actually help, and how to build a mental health plan that works for your body and life.
Our message is simple but powerful: when women understand what's happening in their bodies and get the support they deserve, they're able to move through this transition with more confidence, steadiness, and compassion for themselves and the people they love.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚Millennial Menopause: Preparing for Perimenopause, Menopause, and Life's Next Period
FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧Listen to the podcast episode about why boys and girls need different things with Michael Gurian
🎧Listen to my podcast episode about raising girls who know their worth with Kate Rope
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about parenting boys to combat toxic masculinity with Ruth Whippman
Tue, 18 Nov 2025 - 41min - 368 - Q&A: Is the 24/7 news cycle harming your mental health?
We're doing something a little different on Beyond the Sessions this week! Instead of answering a listener question, Dr. Emily Upshur, Dr. Rebecca Hershberg, and I are unpacking a fascinating (and slightly unsettling) study about how media exposure to traumatic events can affect our mental health—and what it means for us and our kids.
In this episode, we talk about:
- A study that found people who watched repeated news coverage about the Boston Marathon Bombing showed more markers of stress than some who were actually there.
- Why constant exposure to distressing headlines can keep your nervous system stuck in fight-or-flight.
- How past trauma and chronic stress can make us more vulnerable to media-induced anxiety.
- What "orienting to safety" means and simple ways to help your brain (and your child's) return to calm.
- How to talk to kids about scary news stories in age-appropriate, grounding ways.
In a world where we're surrounded by 24/7 coverage of crisis and tragedy, this conversation will help you understand what's happening inside your brain and body and give you tools for focusing on building resilience and safety for your child.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
📚 Media's role in broadcasting acute stress following the Boston Marathon bombings
ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about parental dysregulation with Dr. Amber Thornton
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about parental burnout
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to be intentional with your tech use with Catherine Price
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about motherhood as a millennial with Marcella Kelson
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 13 Nov 2025 - 29min - 367 - Navigating high-conflict divorce while prioritizing your own needs and attachment relationships with Karen McMahon
High-conflict divorce doesn't just end a marriage, it can shake your identity, your parenting, and your ability to feel grounded. Joining me to share guidance for parents at the beginning, in the thick of it, or still processing the aftermath is divorce coach Karen McMahon.
Together we explore:
- What defines a high-conflict parent and how this dynamic impacts families.
- Why trying to change your ex keeps you stuck—and where your real power lies.
- Practical strategies to co-parent effectively, even when cooperation feels impossible.
- How to protect kids from the emotional "shrapnel" of conflict while staying grounded yourself.
- How unresolved trauma and attachment patterns can influence who we choose as partners—and how to break those cycles.
- The role of boundaries, support systems, and self-healing in transforming not just your divorce, but your identity moving forward.
Whether you're in the midst of a high-conflict divorce or supporting someone who is, this conversation offers compassionate insight and practical tools to help you reclaim your confidence, protect your children, and move forward with grace.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🔗 https://www.jbddivorcesupport.com/
🎧 Journey Beyond Divorce Podcast
FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
🔗 If you're currently in the midst of separation, moving forward after divorce, or adjusting to life post-split, Upshur Bren Psychology Group's weekly virtual Divorce Process Group for Women provides a safe space for women to process their emotions, gain support, and build strategies for moving forward. Visit https://upshurbren.com/group-womensdivorce or schedule a free 30-minute consultation call to learn more.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 42. Busting divorce myths and breaking down the true affect it has on children: A conversation with Michelle Dempsey-Multack
🎧 322. Navigating divorce or separation through a family systems approach: Preventative steps to reduce the risk of insecure attachment with Una Archer
🎧106. Recognizing and overcoming codependency in parenthood with Alana Carvalho
🎧 199. Q&A: What are strategies for co-parenting with a narcissist?
Tue, 11 Nov 2025 - 48min - 366 - Q&A: How should I handle potty regressions in my older child?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur, and I talk about...
- Why potty regressions can happen even years after a child is toilet trained.
-Why getting to the root of your child's challenges — whether accidents stem from a medical issue or a psychological struggle — is key to finding the right approach and intervention.
- What to do (and what not to do) when your child starts hiding accidents out of shame or embarrassment.
- How to help your child take ownership and build confidence, without making them feel bad.
- Practical tips for handling accidents at playdates, with friends, or in public, while preserving your child's dignity.
This episode will help you make sense of what's behind potty regressions in older kids and offer practical, shame-free ways to support your child's body awareness, confidence, and emotional well-being.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode with everything you need to know before you start potty training
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about bed wetting, constipation and pelvic health with Quiara Smith
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 06 Nov 2025 - 22min - 365 - Secure attachment in autism: How to help neurodiverse kids build joy, confidence, and connection with Dr. Peter Vermeulen
Joining me this week is Dr. Peter Vermeulen, psychologist, author, and founder of Autism in Context. Peter has spent more than 35 years helping families, educators, and clinicians better understand autism and what it truly means to live a happy, meaningful life.
Together we explore:
- Why happiness and well-being deserve as much attention as therapies or interventions for autistic individuals - and what we can learn from autistic people who are thriving.
- How reframing "stereotyped interests" as passions and talents can open doors to meaning, confidence, and even careers.
- Why predictability is so essential for autistic children's sense of safety and how parents can build that into daily routines and relationships to foster a secure attachment bond.
- Just like you feed your child before they get hangry, how parents can "pre-regulate" their child's nervous system throughout the day to prevent overload, meltdowns, and dysregulation.
- Why autistic children absolutely do form attachments — and how differences in communication and perception can lead to misunderstandings in connection, not an absence of it.
- Practical ways to nurture love and security (Spoiler: things like creating predictable rituals, using concrete symbols, establishing shared routines to strengthen your bond, and more!)
Peter's message is both deeply compassionate and hopeful: autistic individuals are capable of happiness, love, and purpose — and when we meet them with curiosity and respect for how their brains see the world, we can help them build lives filled with meaning and joy.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
📚 Autism and The Predictive Brain
FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
🔗 Every child deserves to feel safe, understood, and supported — and every parent deserves a place to turn. At Upshur Bren Psychology Group, we offer a full continuum of autism services: diagnostic testing, individual therapy, and parent support groups for families raising children and young adults on the spectrum. Visit upshurbren.com to learn more about support options for you and your child.
🔗 Leo Kanner and autism: a 75-year perspective
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about neurodiverse brains and sleep with Dr. Funke Afolabi-Brown
🎧 Listen to my podcast episodes about Resources for Infant educarers with Deborah Carlisle Solomon
Tue, 04 Nov 2025 - 1h 03min - 364 - Q&A: Should I let my child eat as much Halloween candy as they want?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode I talk about...
How to handle Halloween candy without guilt, power struggles, or micromanaging. Strategies for finding that balance between restricting sweets while also allowing your child to enjoy the fun of the holiday. Why your own food anxieties might be showing up more than you realize — and how not to pass them on. How to use this as an opportunity to build trust, awareness, and healthy boundaries. Practical ways to help kids build awareness, self-control, and a healthy relationship with food that lasts long after Halloween.If your feeling overwhelmed about just how you're going to approach trick-or-treating this year, this episode will help you cut through the noise, manage your own worries, and approach this holiday with more confidence.
LEARN MORE ABOUT ME:
Check out my website: drsarahbren.com
Follow me on Instagram: @drsarahbren
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
📚 Child of Mine: Feeding with Love and Good Sense by Ellyn Satter
🔗Watch my ✨FREE✨ workshop, Overcoming Power Struggles, where I'll teach you the exact strategies I use in my clinical practice to help parents break free from the cycle of yelling, threats, and negotiations—and instead foster cooperation, connection, and calm. Just visit drsarahbren.com/powerstruggles to get instant access to this workshop.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how can I help your child feel less scared of Halloween?
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about how to know if you're giving in too much and becoming permissive
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 30 Oct 2025 - 29min - 363 - Why you keep getting triggered: Understanding insecure attachment and breaking the cycle with Jessica Baum
Joining me this week is Jessica Baum, licensed mental health counselor, relationship expert, and author of the new book SAFE: Coming Home to Yourself and Others.
Together we explore:
- How insecure attachment patterns form in childhood and continue to shape how we show up as adults and parents.
- Why parents with a history of insecure attachment may find themselves more easily triggered by their children.
- The difference between awareness and healing, and why insight alone isn't enough to create real change.
- How to repair attachment wounds by learning to regulate your own nervous system.
- What the "Wheel of Attachment" reveals about the fluid, nuanced nature of our attachment patterns.
- How doing your own inner work can transform not just your relationships, but the emotional security you pass down to your kids.
If you've ever wondered why you react the way you do or how to stop repeating painful relational cycles, this conversation will help you understand what's happening beneath the surface and give you hope that true, lasting healing is possible.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🔗https://jessicabaumlmhc.com/interview
📚Safe: An Attachment-Informed Guide to Building More Secure Relationships
📚Anxiously Attached: Becoming More Secure in Life and Love
🔗 Conscious Relationship Group
FOLLOW US ON SOCIAL MEDIA:
📱IG: @jessicabaumlmhc, FB: Conscious Relationship Group, LinkedIn: Jessica Baum, LMHC, CAP
ADDITIONAL REFERENCES AND RESOURCES:
🔗 Interested in learning more about attachment science? Go to drsarahbren.com/secure to download my free guide, The Four Pillars of Fostering Secure Attachment, helping you parent with a focus on attunement and trust.
📚 The Heart of Trauma: Healing the Embodied Brain in the Context of Relationships
🔗 What is conscious parenting?
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
Tue, 28 Oct 2025 - 51min - 362 - Q&A: How can I teach my child if talking about their behavior just makes them reactive and upset all over again?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
- Why some kids, especially sensitive kids, get dysregulated all over again when parents calmly try to talk about what happened later.
- How shame can get triggered in your child, even when you're trying to be gentle and supportive.
- What to do when "teaching moments" keep turning into meltdowns.
- Why focusing on the before (not the after) of a hard moment can make all the difference.
- Practical ways to help your child build self-control, handle frustration, and practice new skills without reactivating big emotions.
If you've ever thought, "I waited until she was calm… why is she losing it again?" this episode will help you understand what's really going on beneath the surface and give you fresh, compassionate strategies to help your child learn and grow.
REFERENCES AND RELATED RESOURCES:
🔗 Go to drsarahbren.com/discipline to download my free guide on effectively disciplining your child with strategies that don't utilize shame or guilt - but still work to get your child to behave!
👉🏻 Learn more about Parenting by Design, my guided program for increasing behavioral and emotional regulation in sensitive kids.
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about disciplining your sensitive child with Dr. Vanessa Lapointe
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about supporting a child a sensitive child
🎧Listen to my podcast episode about preventing burnout when you have a sensitive child
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 23 Oct 2025 - 18min - 361 - Understanding toddlerhood: How to effectively set limits, stay calm, and parent with confidence with Devon Kuntzman
Joining me this week is Devon Kuntzman, the author of the brand-new book Transforming Toddlerhood: How to Go From Surviving to Thriving in the Toddler Years. Devon is here to talk about what's really going on beneath the surface of those big toddler behaviors—and how parents can respond with calm, confidence, and connection.
Together we explore:
Why those "challenging" toddler behaviors (like tantrums, hitting, and defiance) are actually developmentally appropriate—and what they're communicating.
How to shift from punishment to teaching, and use discipline as a tool for learning rather than control.
The meaning behind Devon's concept of developmentally smart parenting and how it helps you set firm but kind limits.
Practical tools for staying grounded and patient during your child's biggest meltdowns.
How to step out of power struggles without giving up your authority.
Why your calm, confident presence is the most powerful parenting strategy you have.
Whether you're deep in the toddler trenches or preparing for this next stage, this conversation will help you see your child's behavior through a new lens—and bring more confidence, connection, and compassion into your parenting.
LEARN MORE ABOUT MY GUEST:
🔗 https://www.transformingtoddlerhood.com/
FOLLOW US ON INSTAGRAM:
CHECK OUT ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 209. How can I get my toddler to share and play nicely with other kids?
🎧 231. BTS: How can I build my toddler's assertiveness skills?
Tue, 21 Oct 2025 - 48min - 360 - Q&A: How can I help my 4-year-old feel less scared of Halloween?
Beyond the Sessions is answering YOUR parenting questions! In this episode Dr. Emily Upshur and I talk about...
- Why Halloween can feel scary for preschoolers and what's happening developmentally as they work through the difference between what's real and pretend.
- Strategies you can use to help your child feel safe and confident around spooky decorations, costumes, and trick-or-treating.
- A simple tip you can start doing now to help your child understand that masks and costumes are just pretend.
- How to prepare your child ahead of time with coping strategies for when something feels too scary in the moment.
- How to know when it may be appropriate to gently stretch your child's comfort zone and when to call it a night.
If your little one is nervous about ghosts, monsters, or just the noise and chaos of Halloween night, this episode will help you turn spooky season into a playful, confidence-building experience for your child and a less stressful one for you.
ADDITIONAL PODCAST EPISODES YOU MAY LIKE:
🎧 Listen to my podcast episode about building your child's resilience
WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU:
Go to https://drsarahbren.com/question to send us a question or a topic you want to hear us answer on Securely Attached - Beyond the Sessions!
Thu, 16 Oct 2025 - 19min
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