What Fresh Hell: Parenting, Relationships, and Making Life Better, with Two Funny Moms

How do we parent middle schoolers while simultaneously experiencing the PTSD of our own middle school years? Kristin Hensley and Jen Smedley , co-hosts of "I Mom So Hard," join Margaret to talk about their how new book, THE MIDDLE SCHOOL MOM'S SURVIVAL GUIDE, approaches puberty, changing friendships, and the increasingly high stakes of parenting tweens and teens with plenty of humor. Margaret, Kristin, and Jen discuss: How our own middle school experiences can color the way we parent Why kids need room to make mistakes and figure things out for themselves. Why being bored makes a kid more interesting Parenting middle schoolers while navigating perimenopause, menopause, and aging parents Here's where you can find Kristin and Jen: https://imomsohard.com Listen to the "I Mom So Hard" podcast @imomsohard on FB, IG, YouTube, and Threads @realimomsohard on TikTok Buy THE MIDDLE SCHOOL MOM'S SURVIVAL GUIDE: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781668201916 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

There are several sneaky ways for the people we work with, or live with, to get away with participating less in the work that needs to happen. "Weaponized incompetence" became TikTok-famous during the pandemic, and most of us became more aware when that was being deployed. A recent Substack post by Ask Astrid suggested that "weaponized passivity" may be a subtler but equally effective opt-out option. When someone says "I don't care what we have for dinner, I'll eat whatever," are they being generous, low-key, and collaborative? Or are they declaring themselves "not it," knowing dinner will still be served (by you) and they'll still get to eat? We discuss: How to spot weaponized incompetence, weaponized passivity, and weaponized irritability How gender roles and socialization teach women to anticipate the needs of the domestic sphere, while rewarding men for being hands-off and largely inattentive Practical ways to challenge these patterns, including recognizing that “not caring” doesn't mean something doesn't need to get done How these dynamics show up with our kids, our teenagers... and yes, sometimes, ourselves We loved Ask Astrid's Substack on this topic and refer to it heavily in this episode. Read for yourself: Meet weaponized passivity: incompetence's quieter sibling Here are links to some of the other resources mentioned in the episode: Maggie Zhou for Refinery29: Why Is ‘Weaponized Incompetence’ Blowing Up On TikTok? Because Too Many Of Us Do It Fresh Take: Allison Daminger, WHAT'S ON HER MIND- The Mental Workload of Family Life Changing the Invisible Workload (with guest Eve Rodsky) Celestial Sylvia on FB: Weaponized incompetence in "You Can See Everything" What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series revisits some of our previous episodes about dynamics with our parenting partners. There are lots of reasons why someone might find parenting easier when their spouse is not around, and not all of them are a cause to call in the couples therapist. A listener posted in our ⁠Facebook group⁠: Anyone else feel like things are easier when their spouse isn’t home? We’ve been dealing with some family issues so he is out of town. I find that when he isn’t here, my kids listen better, we make a good team and work together, they sleep better, etc. Is that weird? How can one person make such a difference? Not much has changed except I do a little more (take out the trash, drop kids off at school) so it’s not that I have more time. It just seems more peaceful in our home or something. And to be honest, I’m not sure it’s a good sign! When we're solo parenting, we have more alone time, we don't have to negotiate child-related or housework-related decisions, and there are fewer dishes and dirty clothes to wash. If you like it when your spouse is away, that doesn't mean you love them any less or they're a bad spouse. But are there advantages we can consider making part of our parenting all the time? That might also be a possibility. Amy and Margaret discuss: Why it's easier to solo parent sometimes How the pandemic changed couple dynamics How to discuss with our spouse how we feel Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Katie Cloyd for Scary Mommy: ⁠"My Life Is Easier When My Husband Travels"⁠ Meredith Bland for Parent Map: ⁠"Parenting is Easier When My Husband is Out of Town"⁠ ⁠We Did Not Sign Up For Being With Our Spouses 24/7 (with guest Damona Hoffman)⁠ ⁠A Room Of Our Own: Claiming the Space We Need⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This episode includes discussion of rape and sexual assault. As parents, we have been horrified by the reports of sexual violence on Cornell’s campus in 2024, and dismayed that so little seems to have changed since we were in college ourselves. How do we teach our children to protect themselves from sexual violence on campus? And how mad do we get to be at the institutions that still aren’t protecting them? On this episode we interview violence prevention expert Meg Stone, executive director of IMPACT Boston and author of The Cost of Fear: Why Most Safety Advice is Sexist, and How We Can Stop Gender-Based Violence and Don’t Fight Back and 10 Other Myths About Crime, Personal Safety, and Gender-Based Violence. This conversation explores why sexual violence is usually committed by someone the victim knows, why common safety advice can be both ineffective and victim-blaming, and what research says about empowerment-based prevention. Meg also discusses practical skills, boundary setting, bystander responsibility, and the role parents and institutions can play—without placing responsibility for violence on those targeted. We discuss: Why the “stranger jumping out of the bushes” is a misleading picture of sexual violence Why one-time online campus trainings often fail to change behavior How victim-blaming has shaped conversations about sexual violence What empowerment-based self-defense programs teach—and why practice matters How stress can make it harder to respond in the moment Why refusal skills and boundary setting can be protective How friends, bystanders, and institutions can interrupt abuse Where families can look for empowerment self-defense and comprehensive sex education The conversation emphasizes practicing refusal and interruption under stress, bystander responsibility, and finding trainings via the Empowerment Self-Defense Alliance and the National Women’s Martial Arts Federation. Here’s where you can find Meg Stone’s work and the resources mentioned: Impact Boston: impactboston.org Meg Stone: megstone.org Empowerment Self-Defense Alliance: https://www.empowermentsd.org/ National Women’s Martial Arts Federation: https://nwmaf.org/ The Cost of Fear by Meg Stone Don’t Fight Back and 10 Other Myths About Crime, Personal Safety, and Gender-Based Violence by Meg Stone Sexual Citizens by Jennifer S. Hirsch and Shamus Khan If you or someone you love has been impacted, help is available. The National Domestic Violence Hotline is available 24/7 at 1-800-799-SAFE or by texting "START" to 88788. RAINN's National Sexual Assault Hotline can be reached at 1-800-656-HOPE. ____________ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

How do we handle conflict with those closest to us without damaging the relationship or going in circles? We discuss why some people avoid conflict while others escalate quickly, how our family of origin shapes the way we handle disagreements, and common triggers for starting conflicts. We discuss: What happens in the brain during conflict Practical conflict-resolution strategies, including the EAR method and the BIFF method Why sometimes the conflict is over before you’re done being angry and how to handle that Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Aaron Steen and Kanade Shinkai for the International Journal of Women's Dermatology: Understanding individual and gender differences in conflict resolution: A critical leadership skill Peter Reuell for the Harvard Gazette: Resolving conflict: Men vs. women Danya Rumore for the University of Utah Environmental Dispute Resolution Program blog: The power of calm when dealing with conflict Bill Eddy for the High Conflict Institute: How to Avoid Getting Hooked by High Conflict Behavior Bill Eddy for the High Conflict Institute: Calming Upset People Fast with EAR Bill Eddy for the High Conflict Institute: How To Write A BIFF Response® Emily Pinto for Katie Couric Media: How To Handle Conflict Without Damaging Your Relationships What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Beth Gellman-Beer spent her whole career fighting for kids with disabilities — first as a student written off as “lazy,” then as a federal civil rights attorney who found her dream job protecting students like her younger self. But on one ordinary night, a phone call changed everything: Her entire office had been eliminated. In the premiere of Zero Reject, reporter Anya Kamenetz traces Beth’s journey from an unfair fourth-grade classroom to the front lines of a sweeping overhaul at the Department of Education’s Office for Civil Rights — the agency families turn to when a school isn’t meeting their child’s needs. Anya breaks down the reduction in force that gutted OCR’s staff, what it means for the 25,000 families still waiting for a response to their complaints, and the plan to dismantle the Department of Education altogether. With fewer people to enforce the law, what happens to the students the system was built to protect? https://lnk.to/zerorejectFD!whatfreshhell Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series revisits some of our previous episodes about dynamics with our parenting partners. Do you feel like the odd parent out in your house? Or do your kids want only you to do everything with them all the time? A listener in ⁠our Facebook group⁠ asked: "Is there an episode about one parent having a very different relationship with a child than the other parent? My 12yo and I seem to have a pretty functional (not perfect) relationship, but he and my hubs seem to end up arguing constantly. Thought at first it was a phase, but if it is, it’s a LOOOOONG one. Would love some perspective on this!" Margaret and Amy discuss: How preferential treatment plays out in younger vs. older kids Why kids save their worst behavior for their primary caregiver Which one of them is conflict-averse and who's conflict-attracted (one guess which is which) Preferring one parent over the other can be developmentally appropriate, but there are times when ganging up on one parent can become too much and needs some course correction. Links! Our episode "⁠When Kids Prefer the Other Parent Over You (Or You Over Them)"⁠ Ryan C. Martin for McSweeney's: "⁠GOOD PARENTS CAPITALIZE ON THEIR INDIVIDUAL STRENGTHS. MY WIFE’S IS SEEING TO OUR KIDS’ EVERY NEED, AND MINE IS ROUGHHOUSING⁠" Marni Feuerman for VeryWell Family: ⁠"How to Cope With Parenting Differences"⁠ Mariah Maddox for Motherly: ⁠"If your kids act differently with you than dad, you’re not imagining it"⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What if kids didn't need chore charts and constant supervision in order to participate in the lives of their households? What if the "mental load" was seen as a family-wide issue, where everyone could contribute to the solution? Sam Kelly, creator of the "Notice and Do" method and author of the new book NOTICE AND DO: Raise Capable Kids, End Motherhood Burnout, and Lighten Your Mental Load, is here to tell us there's another way. Amy and Sam discuss: The "delegator trap"—why constantly assigning tasks keeps moms responsible for the "noticing" Using a "learning ladder" to teach kids of all ages how to take over household tasks, step by step Handling the pushback you might receive as you roll out the "notice and do" method How kids who "notice and do" have agency and take initiative beyond the walls of your home Here's where you can find Sam: https://hellosamkelly.com @samkelly_world on IG Buy NOTICE AND DO: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780063460911 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What have 10 years of doing this podcast taught us about being better parents? In this, our 1,000th episode(!), we look back at the biggest parenting lessons we’ve learned from a decade of conversing with guests, listeners, and each other. Thank you for listening and being on this parenting journey with us! We also reference some of our favorite interviews: our Fresh Take interview with Dr. Siggie Cohen our Fresh Take interview with Dr. Lynyetta Willis our Fresh Take interview with KC Davis What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series revisits some of our previous episodes about dynamics with our parenting partners. We asked the listeners in ⁠our Facebook group⁠ about all the times they caught their spouses being awesome, and here are just a few: supporting their partners through difficult career choices. Reading up on issues that affect their kids. Learning how to do their kids' hair. Awesome parenting partners, all! Here are links to the resources mentioned in the episode: ⁠"Flying the Coop" episode from Reply All podcast⁠ (Margaret's rec) ⁠Our Fresh Take episode with Matthew Fray on Strengthening Our Relationships⁠ ⁠The Explosive Child: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Children⁠, by Ross Greene ⁠Check out our merch!⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Trigger warning: On today's episode we will be discussing pregnancy loss, abortion, and maternal death. Please be advised if those topics are difficult for you. What happens when pregnancy complications become a life-threatening emergency? Margaret’s sister Anne joins us to share her powerful story of nearly dying from a ruptured ectopic pregnancy. Margaret and Anne discuss: What an ectopic pregnancy is and why it can become life-threatening How Anne's experience connects to the current landscape of abortion restrictions The challenges doctors may face when treating ectopic pregnancies and other pregnancy emergencies, given current abortion bans Why policies made far from the exam room can have profound consequences for women and their doctors Here is the ProPublica article referenced in the episode, by Andrea Suozzo and Agnel Philip: Ectopic Pregnancy Deaths Have Nearly Doubled. It’s Worse in States With Abortion Bans. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Margaret Ables and Amy Wilson. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why do some kids completely fall apart when it’s time to leave the playground, get ready for school, or switch activities? We dive into why transitions are particularly difficult for some kids and what parents can do to make them easier. Here's what we discuss in this episode: how anxiety, ADHD, autism, and OCD can cause unique issues with transitions reframing a child’s behavior as a "signal" to help parents focus on the underlying problem how parents can validate emotions while still setting clear boundaries practical strategies for helping kids transition, including verbal "previews," visual schedules and timers, and predictable routines Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Our Fresh Take with Dr. Siggie Cohen Our Fresh Take with Dr. Stacy Haynes Katherine Martinelli for the Child Mind Institute: Why Do Kids Have Trouble With Transitions? Claire Lerner for Psychology Today: The Trouble With Transitions Kristine Cain for Building Bright Futures blog: Why Some Children Struggle More with Transitions Than Others Lerner Child Development: The Trouble With Transitions: Why They Are So Hard For Some Kids And How To Help Houston Family Therapy Associates: Why Kids Resist Transitions (and How to Help) Lerner Child Development: How "Two-Great Choices" Prevents Power Struggles Dr. Michael Sweeney Visual timer for kids Hourglass timer Assessment of Lagging Skills and Unsolved Problems What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series is all about reducing the friction between ourselves and our kids when trying to communicate with them, whether it's yelling less, finding real reasons for constant defiance, or picking our battles. Parenting is a series of everyday battles. But which ones are truly worth fighting? In this episode we discuss the Sisyphean nature of the overuse of the word 'like', to a cleaned-up playroom, to the unending struggle of getting tweens to wear pants—and which of these battles might be 1) winnable and 2) worth the work. Some things really do matter for the long-term success of our kids (and peace of our households); some might be worth letting go in order to let our kids have that win once in a while. In this episode, we unpack how to tell the difference. What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We want our kids to feel validated and heard. We also don't want to engage in five-hour negotiations every time they have to do something they don't want to do. Where's the happy middle? Child development specialist Dr. Siggie Cohen, author of YOU ARE THE PARENT, explains how parents can create a balanced approach. Dr. Cohen explains why well-intentioned parents can end up overexplaining, over-fixing, over-advising, and trying too hard to prevent their children from experiencing difficult emotions. Dr. Cohen and Margaret discuss: The difference between validating emotions and accommodating behavior Why children need to learn both emotional awareness and the ability to function even when they don't feel like doing something How parents can respond when kids are overwhelmed and why stopping inappropriate behavior doesn't mean stopping the emotion behind it Why happiness shouldn't be the ultimate goal for children How to make true, authentic repair after parenting mistakes Here's where you can find Dr. Cohen: https://drsiggie.com @dr.siggie on IG, FB, and YouTube @parenting.with.dr.siggie on TikTok Free resources on her website, including her newsletter signup Buy YOU ARE THE PARENT: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780063448643 We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Margaret Ables and Amy Wilson. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Which kid behaviors need to be addressed in the moment—and which are better ignored? We discuss when to fix behavior and when to let it go, from whining and backtalk to tantrums and other attention-seeking behavior. Topics include: How to reduce power struggles while still establishing clear rules and boundaries Why target behaviors should be specific and observable How to set expectations before challenging behavior happens Practical strategies for handling difficult behavior in public Knowing when a child's behavior is really a signal of an unmet need This episode includes advice from the Child Mind Institute's Complete Guide to Managing Behavior Problems. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Margaret Ables and Amy Wilson. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series is all about reducing the friction between ourselves and our kids when trying to communicate with them, whether it's yelling less, finding real reasons for constant defiance, or picking our battles. What do we do when one of our kid's moods is affecting everyone else in the house? Whether it's anxiety, frustration, rigidity, or plain old temper tantrums, understanding where it's coming from is the first step. But even when we don't allow emotions to be an excuse poor behavior, that misbehavior can happen anyhow—and walking on eggshells is no way to teach the dysregulated person better emotional skills. In this episode, we discuss: the sometimes hidden needs of the other kids in the house why "fair" is not the same thing as "equal" the single most important factor for positive family well-being Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Our episode ⁠"When One of Our Kids Is Taking All Our Bandwidth"⁠ Nicole Schwarz for ⁠imperfectfamilies.com⁠: ⁠When The Siblings of a Difficult Child Feel Ignored⁠ Leigh Anderson for Lifehacker: ⁠What to Do If Your Child's Behavior Is Ruining Your Relationship With Your Partner⁠ Pamela Li for Parenting for Bain: ⁠Emotional Regulation in Children | A Complete Guide⁠ Jane Indergaard for ADHD Newsstand: ⁠It's Never About Me: The Hidden Needs of Siblings⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

How much of your time is actually going toward what matters most to you? Career expert and author Fran Hauser joins us to talk about her new book, 20 MINUTES IS THE NEW HOUR, and how women can rethink their relationship with time. We discuss: The “four Ps” that can quietly consume our time: perfectionism, people-pleasing, procrastination, and padding Applying these ideas to family life How a “to-don't” list can help you get your priorities in order The difference between chronos (clock and calendar time) and kairos (the quality and experience of time) Here's where you can find Fran: https://franhauser.com @fran_hauser on IG and Threads Buy 20 MINUTES IS THE NEW HOUR from Bedford Books: https://www.bedfordbooks.shop/store/p/20minutes We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Margaret Ables and Amy Wilson. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We want our kids to grow and stretch their wings, but that doesn't mean every milestone is easy for parents. We talk about the complicated emotions that come with parenting transitions, from starting school to getting a driver's license to moving into a first apartment. We discuss: Why a child's growing independence can bring sadness, anxiety, nostalgia, and even a loss of identity for parents The "second arrow of suffering," aka beating yourself up for having perfectly normal feelings about your kids' milestones How to talk about your emotions without making your child responsible for them Practical ways to navigate difficult transitions during parenting Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: CDC: Tips for Encouraging Independence Collischon, Matthias, et. al for the Advances in Life Course research Journal: Parental well-being when children move out: A panel study on short- and long-term effects American Psychological Association: Parents and caregivers are essential to children’s healthy development Hartanto, Andree, et. al for the Communications Psychology Journal: Cultural contexts differentially shape parents’ loneliness and wellbeing during the empty nest period We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Margaret Ables and Amy Wilson. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series is all about reducing the friction between ourselves and our kids when trying to communicate with them, whether it's yelling less, finding real reasons for constant defiance, or picking our battles. Why do formerly-sunny kids turn overnight into little tornadoes of defiance and aggression? A listener posted this question in our Facebook group: My four-year-old daughter has recently developed a special, defiant, boundary-testing, aggressive version of herself that she saves only for me. I can’t make sense of it at all. WFH, send help! In this episode, we explain why these sudden onsets of periods of dysregulation are completely normal almost every kid will go through this—and a lot of four-year-olds, although not they do not have exclusive ownership of this sort of behavior and why most kids alternate between periods of regulation and dysregulation repeatedly as they grow and mature. These difficult stretches don't mean you're doing anything wrong as a parent. They don't mean you need to lock everything down because your kid will be a tornado forever. But they also don't mean mean you need to become the 24/7 punching bag for your dysregulated kid. Here's what to do instead. Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Rebecca Onion for Slate: ⁠Why These Child Psych Books From the 1980s Are All Over Parenting Facebook Groups Today⁠ Allana Robinson for Mom Halo: ⁠Here's why your 4 year old's behaviour is out of control⁠ Uncommon Sense Parenting with Allana Robinson: ⁠What Exactly Is Stress?⁠ Louise Bates Ames: ⁠Your Four-Year-Old: Wild and Wonderful⁠ Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to https://heypolo.com/hell or use code HELL and get 70% off your first year! We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Margaret Ables and Amy Wilson. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why do ordinary sounds like chewing, slurping, or pen-tapping trigger intense averse reactions in some people? And what does a parent do when it's her own kid screaming at her for having a case of the sniffles? Clinical psychologist Dr. Thomas W. Phelan, author of STOP THAT CHEWING! joins Amy to explain the neurophysiological underpinnings of misophonia, why it can be so difficult for sufferers and their families, and how to stop this involuntary response from completely disrupting your family life. Dr. Phelan and Amy discuss: Why anxiety, OCD, ARFID, and other neurological manifestations often accompany misophonia Why siblings and parents (especially fathers) are most likely to be triggers The impact of misophonia on relationships, school, work, and social life Practical ways to manage misophonia triggers and work towards sustainable solutions Here's where you can find Dr. Phelan: https://www.123magic.com https://stopthatchewing.com Buy STOP THAT CHEWING: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9798995697824 We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Margaret Ables and Amy Wilson. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why does it feel harder than ever to get together with our friends? Why does every "we should hang out soon!" in a group text feel destined to peter out before it actually happens? In this episode, we explore the modern “friendship recession" that started during the pandemic and hasn't changed back. We discuss: the surprising finding that the quantity of one's friendships matters at least as much as the quality how to set the bar for in-person gatherings a little lower why having three old friends is good, but bringing new people in migh be even better practical ways to build more connection into everyday life Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Kathleen Walsh for The Cut: "I Should Be Allowed to Cold-Call My Friends” Erica Pandey for Axios: Americans of all ages are spending less time socializing Derek Thompson for The Atlantic: The Anti-Social Century Russell Contreras for Axios: 15,000 churches could close this year amid religious shift in U.S. Daniel A. Cox for Survey Center on American Life blog: Yes, Having More Friends is Better Daniel A. Cox for Survey Center on American Life newsletter: America’s “Friendship Recession” Is Weakening Civic Life H.K. Collins, et. al. for the Proceedings of the Natural Academy of Sciences: Relational diversity in social portfolios predicts well-being What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to https://heypolo.com/hell or use code HELL and get 70% off your first year! We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series is all about reducing the friction between ourselves and our kids when trying to communicate with them, whether it's yelling less, finding real reasons for constant defiance, or picking our battles. SHOULD we yell at our kids? No. Do we? Yes. Some of us perhaps a little too often. Kids are hardwired to push our buttons to get attention, and none of us are saints. But while verbal abuse is definitely horrible, hollering “you are about to miss the bus again” is perhaps a little more forgivable—and fixable, as it turns out. And it is definitely better to yell less, not just because you’ll have a more peaceful home, but because the more yelling your household has in it, the more it is likely to have. In this episode Amy and Margaret discuss: Why yelling at your kids might not be as universally toxic as some headlines have claimed Why yelling is, in the end, ineffective Why finding workarounds for the sources of tension might be a more effective path to change than berating yourself for (once again) having raised your voice Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: ⁠Our Fresh Take with Carla Naumburg⁠ ⁠Our Fresh Take with Emily Edlynn⁠ Lisa Belkin for NYT: ⁠Can Yelling at Your Kids Be Good?⁠ Sue Shellenbarger for WSJ: ⁠Talking to Your Kids After You Yell⁠ Ming-Te Wang and Sarah Kenny in the Journal of the Society for Research in Child Development: ⁠Longitudinal Links Between Fathers’ and Mothers’ Harsh Verbal Discipline and Adolescents’ Conduct Problems and Depressive Symptoms⁠ Dr. Emily Edlynn for Psychology Today: ⁠The Truth About Parents Who Yell at Kids⁠ Stephen Marche for NYT: ⁠Why You Should Stop Yelling at Your Kids⁠ Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to https://heypolo.com/hell or use code HELL and get 70% off your first year! We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Margaret Ables and Amy Wilson. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What if being a comedian is kind of great for most things, but not so much for parenthood? We talk with Sona Movsesian, co-host of Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend and author of the new book THE WORLD'S WORST MOM, about mom guilt, the mental load, and what becoming a mother taught her about her relationship with her own mom. We discuss: why Sona calls herself the “World's Worst Mom” the special fresh hell of twin boys how you see your mom differently as soon as you become one Here's where you can find Sona: @sonamov on IG Buy THE WORLD'S WORST MOM: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9798217046706 Listen to the "Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend" podcast Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to https://heypolo.com/hell or use code HELL and get 70% off your first year! We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Youth sports used to mean riding your bike to your friend's house to play Wiffle ball in the backyard, with a tree for second base. Eventually you'd head to the rec center, maybe join the school team. But those days are long gone. Kids' sports have become so involved, specialized, and expensive that fewer and fewer kids are even able to participate— and those who do play have to opt in to grueling practice schedules and travel teams that prioritize achievement and winning above many of the lessons sports are supposed to teach kids in the first place. Inspired by Caitlin Moscatello’s New York Magazine article “The Pay-to-Play Childhood,” we discuss how youth sports have shifted toward an increasingly expensive, competitive, and business-driven model, including: Why travel teams and sports specialization have become the norm The pressure parents feel to make their kids competitive at an early age How the wealth gap informs youth sports and elite athletic teams What parents and communities can do to make youth sports more accessible Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Written Testimony of Katherine Van Dyck Before the U.S. House Committee on Education for a Hearing on “Benched: The Crisis in American Youth Sports and Its Cost to Our Future” i9 Sports: Chances of Getting an Athletic Scholarship Stephen Borelli for USA Today: Congress addresses 'crisis' in youth sports. Can we fix it? Neglect of probability, defined Ryan Huettel for These Football Times: US Soccer and the re-imagining of an elitist culture Gabe Fernandez for SFGate: As youth sports costs soar, one Oakland neighborhood tries a creative solution Reset as a sports parent: 5 ways to get (or keep) kids active Our Fresh Take with Stuart Slavin on The Pressures Causing Depression, Anxiety, and Burnout in Our Kids What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to https://heypolo.com/hell or use code HELL and get 70% off your first year! We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series is all about reducing the friction between ourselves and our kids when trying to communicate with them, whether it's yelling less, finding real reasons for constant defiance, or picking our battles. We've all had times when our kids resist every. single. thing. you tell them to do. When is it part of a larger problem, and even if it's not, how do we manage the exhausting defiance? Amy and Margaret discuss: How to keep track of a kid's defiance in order to figure out where it's coming from Gut-check questions to ask yourself to ascertain where ODD might be what's happening the "two free requests" approach Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Katherine Lee for VeryWell Family: ⁠Effective Ways to Handle Defiant Children⁠ Royce Flippin for Additude: ⁠Why Is My Child So Angry and Defiant? An Overview of Oppositional Defiant Disorder⁠ Dr. Douglas Riley: ⁠The Defiant Child: A Parent’s Guide to Oppositional Defiant Disorder⁠ Mount Sinai Parenting Center: ⁠Positive Opposites⁠ Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to https://heypolo.com/hell or use code HELL and get 70% off your first year! We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Back-to-school season doesn’t have to be a chaotic scramble. In this "Best of" episode, Margaret and Amy share practical tips to help parents make the transition smoother—without getting caught up in the “back-to-school industrial complex.” From resetting sleep schedules to planning meals and snacks, here's what really matters for your child’s success and well-being this fall. You’ll hear strategies for easing morning stress, tackling "after-school restraint collapse,” and checking in on your family’s values to make sure those priorities are aligning with your new school-year schedule. Margaret and Amy discuss: How much sleep kids really need—and how to help them get it Meal and snack strategies to keep your kid energized Using visual schedules to stay organized Share this episode with a fellow parent who's overwhelmed with all things back-to-school! Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Drew DeSilver for Pew Research Center: ⁠‘Back to school’ means anytime from late July to after Labor Day, depending on where in the U.S. you live⁠ Rachel Murphy for PennState blog: ⁠The Medical Minute: Parents, add these health tips to back-to-school to-do lists⁠ Fousia Abdullahi for Fort Worth Star-Telegram: ⁠Expert advice for a stress-free back-to-school season for North Texas families⁠ ⁠Bear in the Big Blue House potty-training episode⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to ⁠https://heypolo.com/hell⁠ or use code HELL and get 70% off your first year! ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Overfunctioning is usually defined as taking on excess responsibility for other people’s feelings, issues, and tasks. And it's usually presumed to be tied to anxiety. IF someone's overfunctioning, it's either a symptom of or cause of the panic assumed to be lying just underneath. But are we "overfunctioning" when we're doing our absolutely regular amount of way-too-much as a parent? Does anxiety have to have anything to do with it? In this episode, we're talking about the stress that comes with being the backstop how to sense overfunctioning in ourselves as a potential barometer of anxiety the MoSCoW method (Must Have, Should Have, Could Have, Won't Have) as a business-world framework that can help all of us discern what absolutely has to happen in a given "timebox"... and what might be able to wait Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Kate Manne on Substack: In Defense of Mom Anxiety Anne-Laure Le Cunff for Ness Labs: Overfunctioning: The Drive to Do it All, or When Helping Others Is Hurting You Yunus Emre Yalçıner for Medium: The Moscow Method: A Comprehensive Guide to Prioritization in Project Management And in response to this week's mailbag, here are a few of our past episodes specifically relevant to single / solo parenting: Our episode Solo Parenting Seasons and How To Get Through Them Our Fresh Take with Jamilah Lemieux Our Fresh Take with Norah Lally Our Fresh Take with Susan Sutton Chris Fleming: COMPANY IS COMING!!! What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to ⁠https://heypolo.com/hell⁠ or use code HELL and get 70% off your first year! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This "Deep Dive" series revisits a few of our past episodes on back-to-school challenges such as the morning rush, school projects which require lots of parental oversight, and how to help our kids navigate intensifying academic pressure. Two recent national studies underlined that there's a surprising group of children at risk for worse mental health outcomes: kids who go to high-achieving schools. How do we protect our kids from the pressures all around them to succeed at any cost? ⁠Jennifer Wallace⁠, author of the book ⁠Never Enough⁠, shows us how to teach our kids that they matter intrinsically. Jennifer Wallace is an award-winning journalist and a frequent contributor to the Wall Street Journal and the Washington Post. She lives in New York City with her husband and their three teenagers. Amy, Margaret, and Jennifer discuss: Why achievement pressure is at an all-time high How parents contribute to, but are not solely responsible for, this pressure How to teach our kids that they matter independently of their achievements Here's where you can find Jennifer: ⁠jenniferbwallace.com⁠ @jenniferbwallace on IG @jennifer.b.wallace on FB Buy Jennifer's book: ⁠https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780593191866⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Protect your loved ones without spying on them. Go to https://heypolo.com/hell or use code HELL and get 70% off your first year! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What if the proven decline in the mental health of today's adolescents isn't just about phones and screen time? What if academic pressure and "achievement culture" is the real driver of the increase in anxiety and depression today's teens are experiencing? Dr. Stuart Slavin, pediatrician and author of THE SUCCESS TRAP, explains just how widespread academic pressure and "achievement culture" in the United States has become— not just in fancy schools on the coasts, and not just in high school, either. Amy and Dr. Slavin discuss: the average teen's default state of sleep deprivation, caused by hours of homework per night (work that may not even do much to change outcomes) the top stressors today's teens report—and why "peer pressure" doesn't even make the top ten how smartphones feed maladaptive perfectionism and achievement culture how schools that reduce demands on kids are also seeing improved test scores and academic performance how parents can create "low-pressure zones" at home how to advocate for healthier expectations at your kids' schools—and why you shouldn't fight that battle on your own Here's where you can find Dr. Slavin: https://drstuartslavin.com Buy THE SUCCESS TRAP: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780593839386 @drstuartslavin on IG What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

When is it useful for our kids to hear about our own life experiences—including situations caused by our own bad decision-making? When does it become oversharing, or get too personal or inappropriate? We discuss how to know how much to tell our kids, and how to have useful difficult conversations, including: our own past choices around drinking, drugs, and sexual activity the family secrets that may be part of our history traumatic and difficult experiences: how do you get across what's important without giving a child information too heavy for them to hold? divorce and family conflict: how not to recruit kids into taking sides of adult disagreements serious illness of a parent, grandparent, or another loved one Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Our Fresh Take with Dr. Mary Martin Lori Michas for Grown and Flown: How Much of Your Past Should You Share With Your Teen? iMom Blog: How Much of Your Past Should You Share With Your Kids? Lynne Meredith Golodner for MetroParent: Should Parents Tell Kids About Their Past? Claire McCarthy for Harvard Medical School Blog: How to talk to children about the serious illness of a loved one What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This "Deep Dive" series revisits a few of our past episodes on back-to-school challenges such as the morning rush, school projects which require lots of parental oversight, and how to help our kids navigate intensifying academic pressure. Linda Flanagan is a journalist, researcher, and a former cross-country and track coach. She's also a founding board member of the Positive Coaching Alliance and an Advisory Group member for the Aspen Institute’s Reimagining Sports initiative. Flanagan's book is ⁠TAKE BACK THE GAME: How Money and Mania Are Ruining Kids' Sports--and Why It Matters⁠. Linda tells Amy and Margaret what forces conspired to make the youth sports landscape the way it is today. In this episode, Linda, Amy, and Margaret discuss: How the purpose of kids' sports has changed since we were playing ourselves [7:00] Why we assume sports build character, and whether that's true [14:30] How recruitment for college sports affects both kids' and parents' perspectives [22:15] Here's where you can find Linda: ⁠Buy Linda's book⁠ @lindaflanagan2 on Twitter ⁠Mindshift Podcast on NPR⁠ Read Linda's article in The Atlantic: ⁠"The Downsides of Having an Athlete in the Family"⁠ Our previous episode on kids' sports: "⁠Youth Sports: If You Must⁠" What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What does it really mean to become an active participant in the care of your own health? In this episode, Margaret talks with primary care physician Dr. Lucy McBride about her new book, Beyond the Prescription: A Doctor’s Guide to Taking Charge of Your Health. They discuss how to become a more self-aware and empowered patient, as well as: The difference between medicine and "wellness" Why data is less useful without full context How stress and grief can affect physical health The four parts of whole-person health: informatics, inputs, infrastructure, and insight Why health decisions involve trade-offs The importance of understanding your own “patient personality” How to ask better questions at medical appointments How to make shared decision-making part of your healthcare Why quality of life matters alongside longevity Here's where you can find Dr. McBride: https://www.lucymcbride.com/ https://lucymcbride.substack.com/ @dr.lucymcbride on IG and LinkedIn Buy BEYOND THE PRESCRIPTION: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781668024386 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Subscribe to our monthly newsletter!⁠ Feeling overwhelmed by everything that needs to get done? If you're the person who keeps track of the appointments, school forms, groceries, household repairs, gifts, kids' activities, and all the little things that seem to live permanently in your head, you may not need to get better at managing your workload—you may need to outsource some of it. We tackle a listener question about how to outsource the household workload without having pockets deep enough for full-time help. We talk about why outsourcing can actually feel like more work at first, how to decide what to hand over, and how to get other people to truly take responsibility instead of simply giving you another task to manage. Here are some topics we discuss: Why the mental load is usually a systems problem Glass balls vs rubber balls, and how to tell the difference Why part-time help is a great way to outsource why making your own life easier is a legitimate use of your resources Here are links to some of the resources discussed in the episode: Zawn Villines on Substack: Why the 'Fair Play' book doesn't fix labor inequality for most couples Zawn Villines on Substack: Results of the State of Household Inequality Survey Show How Damaging Heterosexual Relationships Are to Women Sarah Aswell for Scary Mommy: A Woman Is Going Viral For Timing How Long Unpleasant Tasks Actually Take Christi Newrutzen on TikTok Our Fresh Take with Eve Rodsky What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This "Deep Dive" series revisits a few of our past episodes on back-to-school challenges such as the morning rush, school projects which require lots of parental oversight, and how to help our kids navigate intensifying academic pressure. So many of us spend hours chauffeuring our kids back and forth to their myriad activities. Why are kids so overloaded with activities these days, and can we get off of this ride? Here are some parenting strategies for navigating this issue. Amy and Margaret discuss: Why kids are so overscheduled these days How overscheduling really affects kids, beyond the mom guilt-inducing headlines What questions to ask when assessing if our kids are overscheduled Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: ⁠Dr Shimi King: Overscheduling Your Kids Isn’t the Fast-Track to Success it Once Was⁠ Solution Health: ⁠Overbooked Kids: The Overscheduled Crisis⁠ Anna Nordberg for Slate: ⁠The Fine Art of Underscheduling⁠ Jill Barshay for Mind Shift: ⁠Overscheduling Kids’ Lives Causes Depression and Anxiety, Study Finds⁠ Carolina Caetano, et. al for Economics of Education Review: ⁠Are children spending too much time on enrichment activities?⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We think of rewarding kids as a surefire way to get the behavior we want. But what if rewards mainly serve to underline our children's intrinsic drive to succeed? Dr. Özgür Bolat, education scientist and author of The Reward Trap: Why Rewards Backfire and the Real Science for Motivating Kids, explains why rewarding kids may actually undermine their motivation in the long run. As Dr. Bolat explains, there's a difference between motivation and compliance. Rewards can get children to do something, but they don't necessarily create the ownership, engagement, or intrinsic motivation parents actually want. In this episode, we discuss: How rewards can change the way children view an activity Hedonic adaptation and why rewards often need to get bigger to have the same effect The connection between rewards, praise, and controlling parenting How autonomy-enhancing parenting differs from control Why family chores can help children develop a sense of responsibility and prosocial values Mastery orientation vs. performance orientation, and how each affects children's anxiety and motivation Why focusing too heavily on grades, competition, and achievement can create performance anxiety How parents can encourage curiosity and help kids find motivation even in subjects they don't initially enjoy The role of flow in learning and why children become deeply engaged when a task matches their skill level Why differentiated learning matters—and what happens when work is too easy or too difficult How rewards and competition in school can contribute to learned helplessness Why understanding big concepts can actually help children remember facts and information Dr. Bolat's PEACE model for building connection with children How getting curious about the reason behind a child's behavior can reveal what they actually need Why a homework problem may be a symptom of a much bigger issue around fear, judgment, or connection Here's where you can find Dr. Bolat: https://ozgurbolat.co.uk/ LinkedIn @dr.ozgurbolat on IG https://ozgurbolat.substack.com/ Buy THE REWARD TRAP: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9798893961805 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What happens when one child’s needs take up most of a family’s attention? Even when parents are doing their best, it can be easy for another child to quietly become the “easy” one—the independent kid, the high achiever, the people-pleaser who never seems to need anything. In this episode, we discuss: What the term glass child means and why some children can become overlooked How hyperindependence can be both a strength and a sign that a child doesn't feel comfortable asking for help Why people-pleasing isn't inherently a bad quality—and when it can become a problem How being the “easy,” responsible, or high-achieving child can lead to perfectionism Why some kids learn to hide anger, sadness, resentment, or other difficult emotions The importance of making space for children to express complicated feelings without judgment How small-T trauma and difficult family dynamics can affect kids even when their experiences don't seem “bad enough” compared with someone else's Why children may act out or seek negative attention when they're feeling overlooked How parents can use short, intentional moments of one-on-one connection to help every child feel seen The idea behind the 7-minute rule: finding small windows of distraction-free connection throughout the day How connection can look different at different ages, from play and cuddling with young children to mentorship and open communication with teens Why you don't need to perfectly balance your attention every single day to make your kids feel loved and supported Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Jenn Lonzer for the Cleveland Clinic: Always Coping, Rarely Seen: Explaining Glass Child Syndrome Dr Becky Kennedy of "Good Inside" blog: What is the 777 Rule in Parenting? Corinne Masur for Psychology Today: Helping Kids Feel They Matter Our episode When One of Our Kids Takes Up All of Our Bandwidth Our Fresh Take with Sara Hirsh Bordo Harlan Cohen on IG What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This "Deep Dive" series revisits a few of our past episodes on back-to-school challenges such as the morning rush, school projects which require lots of parental oversight, and how to help our kids navigate intensifying academic pressure. Whether it’s the science fair, the pinewood derby, or a pre-K shoebox diorama, sooner or later every kid gets assigned a school project that is, without question, a PARENTS' project. What four-year-old can fashion her own “Dress As Your Patron Saint” costume? What sixth-grader can attempt proper MLA citation format without extreme maternal participation?  It’s not so much the projects we mind— it’s the feeling that however we handle it, we’re doing it wrong. If we make the origami cranes for the kid, we’re snowplow parents. If we send them in with a social studies project they made entirely themselves out of paper plates and crayons, we also own their cheek-burning shame when their projects pale in comparison to the professionally produced ones of their peers.  In this episode, we discuss how to discern the right amount of help such projects require: not too much, and not too little. Sure, we can help our kids win the battle of the pinewood derby… but we really want to win the war of having our kids who can someday accomplish things all by themselves.   Here’s links to research and other writing we discuss in this episode:  Susan Messina for Huffington Post: ⁠That Fake Science Fair Poster That Went Viral? I Made It. Here's Why⁠ Dana Goldstein for The Atlantic: ⁠Don't Help Your Kids With Their Homework⁠ ⁠The Broken Compass: Parental Involvement With Children’s Education ⁠ Dr. Keith Robinson and Dr. Angel Harris for the New York Times: ⁠Parental Involvement Is Overrated⁠ Wendy Wisner for Scary Mommy: ⁠It’s Obvious When Parents Complete Their Kid’s School Projects, So Please Stop⁠ ⁠easybib.com⁠ (Amy recommends for an easier way to create bibliographies) ⁠sciencebuddies.org⁠ (Amy recommends as a resource to choose science fair projects)  What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Kids (and adults) with ADHD don't actually have a deficit of attention. Today, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder is more properly understood as a deficit of executive function— and as this week's guest ⁠Michael McLeod⁠, founder of GrowNOW ADHD and author of ⁠THE EXECUTIVE FUNCTION PLAYBOOK⁠, explains, executive function means a whole lot more than a messy backpack. To help kids with ADHD succeed, Michael argues, parents need to help children strengthen the internal skills that lead to lifelong independence. In this interview, drawing from his decades of experience working with families whose kids are growing up with ADHD, Michael explains his four-pillar framework for developing executive functioning skills: self-awareness, self-regulation, self-motivation, and self-evaluation. In this episode, you'll learn: How self-awareness and "time blindness" can affect daily life when you have ADHD Why novel experiences are crucial opportunities for kids with ADHD How exposure to screens intensifies ADHD symptoms Why negative attention feels great to the ADHD brain How to support ADHD kids without lowering expectations for their capability Here's where you can find Michael: www. grownowadhd.com @grownowADHD on IG, FB, and YouTube Buy THE EXECUTIVE FUNCTION PLAYBOOK: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781394309153 Buy the accompanying workbook: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781394364589 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Are you certain that people are only pretending to enjoy cilantro? Or mah jongg? We asked our listeners to tell us the things they're convinced no one actually likes. From complicated board games to high school graduations, we discuss the most nominated to be overrated. Here's the link to all of the hilarious answers people gave in our Facebook group! What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This "Deep Dive" series revisits a few of our past episodes on back-to-school challenges such as the morning rush, school projects which require lots of parental oversight, and how to help our kids navigate intensifying academic pressure. Getting-ready playlists? Choosing outfits the night before? Bringing snacks to the pickup line? We asked our audience about their favorite back-to-school tips... and we also allowed some venting about back-to-school craziness as well. Amy and Margaret discuss: To make lunch or not to make lunch How to keep outfits clean at breakfast The best time to grocery shop Here are links to resources mentioned in the episode: Read the full Facebook thread here and if you're not already part of our amazing group, you can join at www.facebook.com/groups/whatfreshhellcast! Watch the short film Amy mentions: "How Was Your Day?" directed by Allison Hadar and Maddie Corman What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Childhood anxiety is on the rise. Parents are often unsure how to respond, and in their well-intentioned efforts to reassure their kids, can sometimes reinforce the anxious patterns. In this interview Kristen McNeely, LMFT, explains how parents can start to help their kids build resilience by taking small, manageable steps toward the things that might scare them. We also discuss school refusal—why it's more complicated than simply not wanting to go to school; the warning signs parents should watch for; and why collaboration between parents, schools, and mental health professionals is essential. Kristen explains why school refusal often begins with school avoidance, how transition years like kindergarten and middle school increase risk, and why pulling kids out of school is rarely an effective long-term solution. Amy, Margaret, and Kristen also discuss: Why parental accommodations can unintentionally fuel anxiety The difference between validating feelings and reinforcing fear Why gradual exposure works better than avoidance The four common drivers of school refusal How ADHD, autism, and separation anxiety can increase risk Why helping kids feel connected to their school community matters How parent-focused treatments like SPACE can improve childhood anxiety—even without the child in therapy sessions Here's where you can find Kristen: https://kristenmcneely.com/ @childhood.empowered on IG https://schoolcapable.kristenmcneely.com/ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

All too often, we leave our kids' pediatric appointments only to remember what we really wanted to ask when we're on the drive home. Fear not: Dr. Mary Martin is in, and she's answering all our burning pediatric-medicine questions. Margaret and Dr. Mary Martin cover all the the topics most likely fill parents' search histories and social media feeds, separating medical facts from internet misinformation and offering practical, judgment-free advice. You'll learn: How to navigate vaccine misinformation Why pediatricians continue to recommend the "ABCs" of safe sleep When it's OK stop comparing your child to everyone else's The babyproofing essentials that actually matter Why reading to babies is so powerful, even before they can talk. How to handle picky eating without turning every meal into a battle The leading causes of preventable childhood injuries and simple ways to reduce risk Practical guidance on screen time, social media, vaping, caffeine, and substance use How to build trust so your child feels comfortable talking about difficult topics like sex, drugs, mental health, and body changes Why finding a pediatrician you trust may be one of the best parenting decisions you make Here are links to some of our other episodes we mentioned: Christina Martin on How Children Learn Through Play How To Deal With Picky Eaters Screen-Free Week: How To Survive and Why It's Worth It Ash Brandin, The Gamer Educator Catherine Price, THE AMAZING GENERATION Emily Cherkin on Tech-Intentional Parenting Mallory Thomas on How to Get Off Our Phones Gaia Bernstein on Gaining Control Over Addictive Technologies Susan Linn on How “Big Tech” Targets Our Kids We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This month, our "Deep Dive" is into some of our past episodes about screen time: the effects it has on our kids, how tech companies engineer their devices to be as addictive as possible, and how we can allow our kids to enjoy screens with supportive limits. Is screen use a daily battle of wills in your house? ⁠Emily Cherkin⁠, author of the new book ⁠"THE SCREENTIME SOLUTION: A Judgment-Free Guide to Becoming a Tech-Intentional Family,"⁠ explains how to model a healthy relationship with tech for our kids. Emily Cherkin, MEd., consults with parents, offers school presentations and professional development training, and brings her tech-intentional approach to as many people as possible. Emily and Margaret discuss: What "tech-intentional" really means and how it's different from being screen-free How to align screen use with family values How to model tech intentionality with your kids Here's where you can find Emily: ⁠http://www.thescreentimeconsultant.com⁠ Instagram: @thescreentimeconsultant Facebook: @thescreentimeconsultant X: @ScreentimeLlc Buy THE SCREENTIME SOLUTION: ⁠https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9798886451122⁠ ⁠Listen to our Fresh Take with Julie Lythcott-Haims⁠ We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What does it really take to build a fulfilling life—and how do we help our kids do the same? Bestselling author and host of the podcast "What It's Like to Be..." Dan Heath joins Amy for a conversation that challenges some of the biggest assumptions parents make about success, careers, decision making, and what their kids will remember most about growing up. Dan shares why meaningful work often comes from unexpected places and why room for experimentation and exploration is one of the greatest gifts we can give our children. Dan and Amy discuss: Why there's no such thing as a universally "good" career How to help kids discover passions without putting pressure on them A simple exercise that creates unforgettable family memories Why experimentation leads to more fulfilling work and life Four common decision-making "villains"—and how to avoid them Practical ways to make parenting, work, and everyday decisions with more clarity Here's where you can find Dan: www.danheath.com Listen to "What It's Like to Be..." Buy Dan's books LinkedIn What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

If you've ever looked at your very different children and wondered how they could possibly share the same DNA, same parents, and same upbringing, you're not alone— and you're not imagining things. Research shows that while siblings are usually more alike in appearance and intelligence than we sometimes think, their personalities are as different from one another as they would be from a stranger on the street. Why is that? This week, we discuss: Why siblings can have vastly different personalities despite common upbringings How birth order influences family dynamics Why "de-identification" tends to be more intense when siblings are closer in age Why "the same household" doesn't actually tell the whole story Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Alix Spiegel for NPR: Siblings Share Genes, But Rarely Personalities Dr. Robert Plomin and Dr. Judy Dunn: Why Are Siblings So Different? The Significance of Differences in Sibling Experiences Within the Family Dr. Frank Sullaway: Why Siblings Are Like Darwin's Finches: Birth Order, Sibling Competition, and Adaptive Divergence within the Family Daniel Goleman for the NYT: Each Sibling Experiences a Different Family Dr. Robert Plomin and Dr Denise Daniels: Why are Children in the Same Family So Different From One Another? Science Daily: Parents’ Comparisons Make Siblings Different Dr. Alexander Jensen and Dr. Susan McHale: What makes siblings different? The development of sibling differences in academic achievement and interests. Annie Wright, LMFT: Same Family, Different Survival: Why You and Your Sibling Turned Out So Differently What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This month, our "Deep Dive" is into some of our past episodes about screen time: the effects it has on our kids, how tech companies engineer their devices to be as addictive as possible, and how we can allow our kids to enjoy screens with supportive limits. How do we untangle ourselves from technology? We give ourselves a hard time for not being able to put our screens down, but the platforms we use are designed to be addictive. It's not our fault. ⁠Gaia Bernstein⁠'s new book: ⁠Unwired: Gaining Control Over Addictive Technologies⁠ shatters the illusion that we can control how much time we spend on our screens by the force of willpower, timers, or yelling. Margaret and Gaia discuss: The psychological forces that make us keep scrolling What Big Tech and Big Tobacco have in common Why screen time limiters and other similar methods don't work Here's where you can find Gaia: ⁠https://gaiabernstein.com/⁠ Twitter: @BernsteinGaia Buy Gaia's book Unwired: ⁠https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781009257930⁠ We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What if the fact that we sometimes we "lose it" as parents doesn't make us bad parents? What if those times stem from an overwhelmed nervous system, and what happens when we get curious about what's underneath? Marriage and family therapist Dr. Cassidy Freitas, host of the "Holding Space" podcast and author of the new book MOM NEEDS A MOMENT, explains why parents "lose it," what our emotional reactions are really telling us, and how we can interrupt generational patterns without striving for perfection. In this episode, you'll learn: How childhood experiences shape your parenting triggers today. The difference between guilt and shame. Why repair after conflict is often more powerful than trying to be a perfect parent. How social media and intensive parenting culture fuel parental burnout and self-criticism. What "creating margin" means—and why a few moments of space can transform your relationship with your children. How to recognize your triggers before reacting. The simple phrase Dr. Freitas uses to calm her nervous system in difficult parenting moments. Here's where you can find Dr. Freitas: www.drcassidymft.com @drcassidy on IG Buy MOM NEEDS A MOMENT: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781523533534 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What are the best ways for us to support our kids' interests? Should we help them become the best gymnasts and singers they can be, as soon as they show glimmers of true interest? Or are they better off exploring many interests, without all of that added pressure? From travel sports to elite ballet training and specialized extracurriculars, childhood activities feel increasingly professionalized, with a lot less room for beginners, dabblers, or kids who just want to have fun. This week, we're wondering whether encouraging curiosity and exploration may be healthier than pushing early specialization. We discuss: The difference between supporting a child's interests and managing their career Why exploration—not specialization—is often the key to discovering lifelong passions How parents can praise effort and enjoyment instead of performance Why your child's purpose may be much bigger than any single job or talent How to encourage resilience when interests change or dreams evolve Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Lindsay Karp for Business Insider: My parents told me to have a career that could support me. I'm telling my kids to follow their passions. Daniel B. Peters for HuffPost: Are We Missing the Mark If We Support Our Children's Passions? Lisa Heffernan for the NYT: Our Push for ‘Passion,’ and Why It Harms Kids Susan Newman for Psychology Today: How to Support and Nurture Your Child's Passions What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This month, our "Deep Dive" is into some of our past episodes about screen time: the effects it has on our kids, how tech companies engineer their devices to be as addictive as possible, and how we can allow our kids to enjoy screens with supportive limits. The dreaded question "When should my kid get a phone?" is one we're asked often. These days "whether" is not part of the equation, and the ages at which our kids' peers are getting phones seems younger than ever. Dr. Catherine Pearlman, author of the new book ⁠First Phone: A Child's Guide To Digital Responsibility, Safety, and Etiquette⁠, is the founder of ⁠The Family Coach⁠ and a licensed clinical social worker who has been working with children and families for more than 25 years. First Phone– a book written not for parents, but for our kids– puts the risks and rewards of a phone in perspective for our children, and helps them consider what parameters they themselves might want to put on their phones and how they can use them wisely. In this episode, Catherine, Amy and Margaret discuss: What we often don't think about when we hand our kids their first phones [12:55] When kids should get their own social media accounts [17:55] How to teach kids about digital consent [31:00] Here's where you can find Catherine: ⁠www.thefamilycoach.com⁠ @thefamilycoach on FB/Twitter @thefamilycoachsays on IG Find Catherine's book in our bookshop: ⁠https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780593538333⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Laura Clery has built a massive digital empire, of over 25 million followers, offering her own blend of silly sketch comedy and unflinchingly vulnerable reality. In this interview, Laura tells Margaret about her new memoir, WHAT DOESN'T KILL YOU MAKES YOU HOTTER , and the unraveling of a marriage shaped by sobriety, relapse, codependency, fame, and the pressure of living so much of life online. Laura and Margaret discuss: Her experience raising a child on the autism spectrum What happens when a relationship falls apart in public Why it can be hard to recognize destructive patterns from the inside How motherhood has made Laura brave Here's where you can find Laura: @laura.clery on FB @lauraclery on IG and TikTok @LauraMarieClery on YouTube Listen to Laura's podcast Idiot Buy WHAT DOESN'T KILL YOU MAKES YOU HOTTER: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781668087343 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You know how sometimes when you're in charge, in a really hard moment, you keep watching the door for an actual grownup to show up? Because it can't possibly be 42-year-old YOU who's in charge at this moment? In this episode we discuss the strange experience of being the person in charge while also feeling wildly underqualified. From broken bones and dinner logistics to taxes, travel mishaps, and medical decision-making, here are the times when we— and our listeners— were hoping for an authorit figure besides ourselves to show up and fix everything. Join our Facebook group to see all of our listeners' hilarious responses! What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This month, our "Deep Dive" is into some of our past episodes about screen time: the effects it has on our kids, how tech companies engineer their devices to be as addictive as possible, and how we can allow our kids to enjoy screens with supportive limits. Psychologist Susan Linn, author of ⁠WHO'S RAISING THE KIDS? BIG TECH, BIG BUSINESS, AND THE LIVES OF CHILDREN⁠, isn't anti-technology. She's anti-advertising to children, and has spent her long career spotlighting the "monumental shift towards a digitized-commercialized childhood." With smart speakers and screens at arms' reach wherever kids go, digital technologies continue to evolve much faster than our understanding of the ramifications of their dominance in our kids' lives. Susan began her career as award-winning ventriloquist (here she is on ⁠Mr. Rogers' Neighborhood⁠!) and has become a world-renowned expert on creative play and the impact of media and commercial marketing on children. In this episode, Susan tells us Why her point isn't to make parents feel guilty Why the best kinds of toys for children do very little How branding can creep in where we sometimes don't even perceive it What we can do to set parameters on the commercializing of our own kids' lives Here's where you can find Susan: Twitter: @drsusanlinn ⁠susanlinn.net⁠ ⁠fairplayforkids.org⁠ Buy Susan's book: ⁠https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781620972274⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

There are these things that you just don't understand why anybody would do. But some people do them. We aren't about judgment at the What Fresh Hell podcast, but we do sometimes have to ask: what kind of monster? What kind of monster listens to videos on speaker? Or keeps the keyboard clicks on their phone? What kind of monster takes up two parking spots? Puts empty cereal boxes back in the cabinet? Gives small children toys with one hundred tiny pieces? We went to our ⁠Facebook page⁠ and we asked people to share what kind of monsters they were encountering on a daily basis. In this episode we explore quite a few. And here's a disclaimer: we may each have been one or more of these monsters before. What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Have you ever felt like your life consisted of too many moving parts at the same time? In this episode, we explore why life tends to deliver too much change at once—and the difference between an actual change and the larger, more uncertain area of transition that both precedes and follows any big change. We discuss: Why even positive and worked-toward life transitions can feel overwhelming once they arrive What "change saturation" and "change fatigue" look like How your business partners, family members, or loved ones might be going through the same change, but on a very different transition timeline Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Our episode "Why We Avoid Uncertainty (And How That Gets In Our Way)" Talkspace blog: How to Keep It Together When Everything Keeps Changing North Highland blog: How Much Change is Too Much Change? Cassandra Worthy: The 3 Stages Of Change Fatigue And How To Recover Prosci blog: Bridges Transition Model Explained and Made Actionable William Bridges Associates: William Bridges Bio Cassandra Worthy: CHANGE ENTHUSIASM Get tickets to see Amy in 42nd Street at the Sharon Playhouse, July 25th through August 9th! sharonplayhouse.org/42nd-street What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series is all about tips to stay sane while traveling with family —immediate or extended, kids younger or older in tow, across the state or across the globe! Does it seem like just as much work to leave your kids behind for a couple of days as not to go in the first place? Do your instructions for family operational procedures during your absence run more than five pages?  Getting away from our kids—for work, for the weekend, for a friend’s 40th—isn’t just good for us. It’s also an opportunity for our kids to realize that “only Mommy” stuff they pull when we’re around is not as necessary as they might have thought. Margaret and Amy discuss: Why our kids may behave better when we aren’t around (and why it's not a bad thing) Why the best time to call your kids when you travel is in the morning How the instructions you leave behind can change as your kids grow Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Kari Bodnarchuk for The Boston Globe: ⁠Preparing Kids for When a Parent Travels⁠ Smart Women Travelers: ⁠Keeping Mom’s Business Trip from Being Mom’s Guilt Trip⁠ Our episode ⁠"We Forgot What Little Kids Were Like"⁠ ⁠Kara Williams has great advice for vacationing with kids of all ages⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why are autoimmune conditions so much more common in women? And does that have anything to do with the fact that those same conditions are misunderstood, under-researched, and accepted as things we just have to live with? Sara Hirsh Bordo, author of the new book AUTOIMMUNITY AND THE GOOD GIRLS, discusses the questions that led her to examine the connection between women’s health, caregiving, stress, and identity. After receiving her own autoimmune diagnoses, Sara began noticing that her fellow sufferers shared similar life patterns: especially eldest daughters, caretakers, and women raised to prioritize everyone else’s needs. That observation led her to fund original research exploring the relationship between girlhood experiences, cultural expectations, and autoimmune disease. Amy and Sara discuss: What autoimmune disease, means and why these conditions remain misunderstood Hypotheses on why autoimmune diagnoses disproportionately affect women The connection between caregiving roles, chronic stress, and the nervous system How our life experiences can shape our long-term health The difference between understanding mind-body connections and blaming ourselves when our bodies fail us Why learning to receive care can be just as important as giving it What it means to rewrite the stories that teach women to earn love through self-denial This conversation explores a question many women may recognize: What happens when being “good” means becoming disconnected from your own needs? Here's where you can find Sara: https://autoimmunityandthegoodgirls.com https://goodgirlsbook.com @sarahirshbordo on IG @sarahirshbordo on LinkedIn Buy AUTOIMMUNITY AND THE GOOD GIRLS: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780063450660 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why is it that our own vacations never look like the perfect, happy families on the posters enjoying their destination without a sunburn, meltdown, or lost bag in sight? Here's how to manage expectations while traveling with kids and enjoy your trip, whatever it ends up looking like! We share stories of Disney overwhelm, international travel wins and disasters, airport anxiety, and the unexpected moments that end up becoming the best parts of a vacation. Topics include: How age and stage affect what kind of travel works best Traveling with neurodivergent kids and accommodating different needs Helping anxious kids prepare for flights and unfamiliar places How to adjust plans when travel stress and meltdowns happen The moments kids remember most (hint: often not what you planned) Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: The Autism Community in Action blog: Traveling with Your Child with Autism TSA Cares program Bill Springer for Forbes Magazine: Kids Who Travel Do Better In School What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series is all about tips to stay sane while traveling with family —immediate or extended, kids younger or older in tow, across the state or across the globe! We asked our listeners what advice they have for harmonious family traveling.⁠ Here are our favorite tips they shared, plus a few of our own, from how early to get to the airport to hitting the top kid-friendly site in Paris! Amy and Margaret discuss: How to communicate effectively with your spouse before traveling Useful packing tips - ⁠here's the carry-on bag Amy loves⁠ Vacation scheduling advice How to include kids in planning vacations What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

As technology improves medicine, and AI accelerates change, how do we maintain the human connection that must exist between doctor and patient? Pediatric neurosurgeon Dr. Alan R. Cohen, author of the new book COMFORT ALWAYS, explains what he's learned in four decades of working with families in extremely intense situations, and how being a "humble physician" remains the most important part of his work. In this episode, we discuss: Why empathy is a skill worth intention and focus The benefits and drawbacks of electronic medical records Why parents' instincts remain a crucial part of their children's care How to advocate for yourself with a disconnected provider Why uncertainty is part of medicine—and part of life Here's where you can find Dr. Cohen: https://www.dralanrcohen.com/ Buy COMFORT ALWAYS: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9798895656198 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Moms hear it all the time: kids save their worst behavior for us because we're their safe space. Understood—but where’s the line between not taking every dig personally and becoming your kids' doormat? When kids lash out—whether it’s a preschooler kicking in a Target checkout line, or a teenager declaring you’re the worst parent in the world—when are we supposed to absorb it, or rise above? And when do we need to set a boundary? In this episode we discuss: Why it's important for parents to allow small children to express negative emotion Why adolescents hand parents their "emotional trash" (h/t Dr. Lisa Damour) the role of "projection" in heightened emotions how parenting an adolescent often means acting as a "wall" for kids to push off—and why that push can manifest as an insult or a slammed door Strategies for responding without escalating conflict ⁠Sign up for the What Fresh Hell newsletter here!⁠ Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Lisa Damour for the NYT: Parents of Teenagers, Stuck Taking Out the Emotional Trash Jody Podl for Your Teen Mag: How Can Loving and Kind Parents Cope With Their Mean Teenagers? Jessica Gudmundson et. al for Infant Behavior Development Journal: Links between mothers' coping styles, toddler reactivity, and sensitivity to toddler's negative emotions. Sharon Selby, MA, blog: What Is Happening When A Child Projects Feelings On To You? Sharon Selby, MA, blog: What Do Parents, A Swimming Pool and Child Development Have In Common? East Bay Behavior Therapy Center Blog: Relationship saboteurs: It’s all your fault versus it’s all my fault What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series is all about tips to stay sane while traveling with family —immediate or extended, kids younger or older in tow, across the state or across the globe! Why don't vacations feel like vacations for moms? Could it be all the prepping, packing, and traveling, with the additional pressure to make memories that will last a lifetime for our little ones? Here's how to make vacations truly fun and relaxing for the whole family. In this episode we discuss the wisdom of "taking turns being tired" why "going with the flow" is not an additive stance to vacation preparation why vacations get better as kids age Here are some links to some writing on the topic that we discuss in this episode: Marie Holmes for HuffPost: ⁠Behind Every Precious Vacation Memory Stands An Exhausted Mother⁠ CafeMom: ⁠Moms Don't Get to 'Relax' on Family Vacations, For the Husbands Who Don't Get It⁠ Colleen Lanin for ⁠Travel Mamas: Ain’t Nobody Happy if Mama Ain’t Happy – Tips for Happy Travel with Kids⁠ The Onion: ⁠Mom Spends Beach Vacation Assuming All Household Duties In Closer Proximity To Ocean⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We know that resilience is a good trait for our kids to have. But can "grit" only be achieved through hardship and repeated failure? Can a kid whose everyday life is pretty cushy still be resilient, and if so, how is that resilience taught? We talk with resilience coach Talia Kovacs about how resilience is a skill that can be nurtured over time—even in the kid who regularly falls apart when the chicken nuggets touch the peas. Drawing from her experience as a classroom teacher, literacy expert, and parent coach, Talia explains why today’s kids are struggling with perfectionism, fear of mistakes, and anxiety—and how parents may be unintentionally reinforcing those patterns. She shares why resilience doesn’t require hardship, how spirituality (a concept distinct from religion) can help children feel grounded, and why independent play and healthy risk-taking matter more than ever. The conversation explores the difference between raising capable kids versus constantly protecting them, why parents’ own nervous systems shape family resilience, and how changing the stories we tell about our children can help them develop confidence and self-trust. Here's where you can find Talia: https://taliakovacs.com Substack: https://substack.com/@taliakovacs LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/taliakovacs/ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What's the one thing you've purchased that has delivered outsized returns in joy and ease? We asked our listeners to tell us the one thing in their lives that has really overdelivered. From travel hacks to sleep upgrades, from time-savers to towels, here are some of our favorites. If you want links to all of the amazing products mentioned in this episode, sign up for our monthly newsletter here! What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series is all about tips to stay sane while traveling with family —immediate or extended, kids younger or older in tow, across the state or across the globe! We've both traveled with our extended families over and over again, and have loved the memories we've made together. But different bedtimes, sightseeing styles, and mealtime expectations can lead to unexpected conflict. Laura in our Facebook group wrote in to say: ⁠"Might be a fun episode before summer: large family vacation traditions. I'm wondering if there are favorite games/foods/tips/funny stories on going away with lots of members of your non-immediate family."⁠ As usual, our listeners responded with great tips for maintaining both organization and sanity when vacationing with extended family, and in this episode we discuss them all, including: Which conversations to have ahead of time—and which conversations never to have at all Systems for family vacations that don't fall on one person (or one gender) to execute Limiting your non-negotiables as a nuclear family ahead of time What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What do hormones actually do—and why are they often misunderstood? We talk with Dr. Gillian Goddard, an endocrinologist and author of The Hormone Loop: An Empowering Guide to Restoring Hormonal Harmony from Puberty to Menopause. Dr. Goddard explains how hormones affect far more than reproduction, influencing everything from metabolism and sleep to mood, stress responses, and cardiovascular health. She breaks down the concept of the "hormone loop" and explains the four major hormonal systems that work together to keep our bodies functioning: reproductive, thyroid, growth hormone, and adrenal (stress) loops. The conversation explores how hormonal changes during puberty, pregnancy, perimenopause, and menopause can affect the entire body—not just reproductive health. We also discuss why women's symptoms are so often dismissed, how cultural attitudes about hormones can prevent women from seeking care, and why tracking symptoms can help patients advocate for themselves more effectively. Other topics include: The relationship between estrogen, the immune system, and thyroid disorders Hormone replacement therapy: benefits, misconceptions, and current research The role of GLP-1 medications in midlife health and weight management Here's where you can find Dr. Goddard: @thesavvypatient on IG https://savvypatient.substack.com Buy THE HORMONE LOOP: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780063455047 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What does it mean to get “mogged,” to be “chalant,” or to “put the fries in the bag”? In this episode we attempt to decode the latest Gen Z slang. (Although now that we've cracked the code, all these words are so nerfed.) Sign up for What Fresh Hell Plus on Supporting Cast to get all episodes ad-free, plus monthly bonus episodes. Supporting Cast works right where you already listen! Go to whatfreshhell.supportingcast.fm to subscribe in two taps for just $4.99 a month, or $39.99 a year. What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series revisits some of our past episodes on discerning what we need as moms, and then asking for it confidently. Do you hate feeling unable to help people in crisis, or do you worry about getting too involved and stepping on toes? There are ways to give help to people in need that are productive and considerate, and our listeners wrote in with some excellent examples. Amy and Margaret discuss: How to avoid the "let me know if you need anything" trap The "comfort in, dump out" model of caretaking The perils of too many lasagnas The best help you can give may be something that feels inconsequential to you but is actually a huge help to the people in need. Whatever your role ends up being during a crisis, accept it graciously, and don't expect a hero's fanfare for your efforts. Links! Anne Helen Petersen: ⁠A Shortcut for Caring for Others (and Being Cared for Yourself)⁠ Susan Silk and Barry Goldman for the LA Times: ⁠"How not to say the wrong thing"⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What should parents know if they're considering divorce? Margaret talks with family law attorneys Kristen Holstrom and Samantha McBride—the hosts of the "Custody Queens" podcast—about custody disputes, co-parenting conflict, child support, digital footprints, and the biggest mistakes people make during separation. Drawing from years of experience in high-conflict custody and divorce cases, Kristen and Samantha explain how family court actually works, why “amicable” divorces can still require strong boundaries, and how parents can protect themselves and their children emotionally, financially, and legally. The conversation covers: Why every custody case is unique—and why Facebook advice can backfire The difference between staying amicable and giving up your rights How courts evaluate custody arrangements and parenting concerns Child support myths, enforcement, and financial responsibility The long-term consequences of social media posts, texts, and digital evidence Why courts care more about safety concerns than personal betrayal Co-parenting with a difficult ex or a new romantic partner in the picture How therapy, documentation, and realistic expectations can reduce conflict Here's where you can find Samantha and Kristen: https://custodyqueens.com/ @custodyqueens and @custodyqueensonair on IG @custodyqueens on TikTok @custodyqueenson-air on YT Listen to "Custody Queens" wherever you listen to podcasts Custody Queens Off the Clock, Kristen and Sam's true crime pod What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sign up for WFH Plus at ⁠http://whatfreshhell.supportingcast.fm/! How does the powerful emotional pull of nostalgia connect to that midlife feeling of "how did I get here?" Why do we love looking back? In this episode, we discuss: Why nostalgia increases during periods of transition and uncertainty (aging parents, growing children, career reckonings) The psychology and science behind nostalgia and memory Why parents often romanticize the baby and toddler years How nostalgia can deepen meaning, connection, and self-understanding Healthy ways to honor memories without getting stuck in the past Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: University of Florida Medical Physiology Online: The Psychology of Nostalgia Emily Reynolds for The British Psychological Society: We feel more nostalgic as we get older Clay Routledge for the Institute for Family Studies: Nostalgia Reveals the Importance of Family and Close Relationships Joe Keohane for the Boston Globe: Why Does Parenthood Make Us Nostalgic? Hannah Seligson for the NYT: Being a Mother Is Hard Work. Is It Actually Harder on Millennial Moms? "The House That Built Me" by Miranda Lambert What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series revisits some of our past episodes on discerning what we need as moms, and then asking for it confidently. If someone asked you "What do you need right now?" would you even be able to articulate it? In her new book ⁠NEEDY: How To Advocate for Your Needs and Claim Your Sovereignty⁠, intuitive coach ⁠Mara Glatzel⁠ lays out a roadmap for how to ascertain our needs as human beings, how to ask for it, and how to be comfortable with receiving it. Mara's work helps humans stop abandoning themselves and start reclaiming their humanity through embracing their needs and honoring their natural energy rhythms. In this episode, Mara and Amy discuss: The societal pressure to be perfect and need-free as mothers The difference between a "want" and a "need" and how they intersect Why it's uncomfortable both to ask for what we need and to finally receive it Mara argues that the more in tune we are with our own needs, the more we are able to peacefully coexist with others and form authentic relationships. Here's where you can find Mara: ⁠https://www.maraglatzel.com/⁠ on her own podcast, ⁠"Needy."⁠ ⁠Here is the link⁠ to Mara's free quiz to help you identify what you need and receive all of her best resources and supportive micro-practices.  Buy Mara's book: ⁠https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781683649847⁠ @maraglatzel on IG We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We often think "ambivalence" means indifference. Its actual meaning is quite different: ambivalence means having multiple and often opposite emotions in one moment. Motherhood contains much joy—but what about the resentment, grief, anger, fear, exhaustion, and guilt that can exist alongside deep love? Psychotherapist and researcher Dr. Margo Lowy joins us to discuss her book MATERNAL AMBIVALENCE: The Loving Moments and Bitter Truths of Motherhood and the emotional contradictions at the heart of parenting. Dr. Lowy explains why naming difficult emotions can actually strengthen our relationships with our children at all stages of our parenting, from postpartum anxiety to learning to let our children go. We discuss: Why the pressures of perfectionism are so damaging for mothers The taboo around negative parenting emotions How self-awareness and emotional honesty can improve parent-child relationships Here's where you can find Margo: https://drmargolowy.com/ @drmargolowy on IG Buy MATERNAL AMBIVALENCE: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9798888455999 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why does it seem so much easier for men to claim large blocks of leisure time for themselves than it is for women? This week, based on a listener question, we are asking: What is the mom equivalent of golf? We unpack the “leisure time gender gap,” why women’s downtime is often treated as optional, and how motherhood changes the way we think about rest, hobbies, and friendship. We discuss: Why golf has become a uniquely protected, and male-coded, form of leisure How parenting young children turns leisure into a zero-sum game Practical ideas from listeners for creating more intentional leisure time which includes connection with friends Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Katie Garrity for Scary Mommy: ⁠⁠Is There A Women's Hobby Equivalent To Men's Golfing Habits?⁠⁠ Bruce Drake for Pew Research Center: ⁠⁠Another Gender Gap: Men Spend More Time in Leisure Activities⁠⁠ Carolina Aragão for Pew Research Center: ⁠⁠Working husbands in U.S. have more leisure time than working wives do, especially among those with children⁠⁠ ⁠⁠Check out the whole thread of excellent ideas in our Facebook group! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series revisits some of our past episodes on discerning what we need as moms, and then asking for it confidently. We’ve all been in moments when we have to make a Big Ask. As in: it’s 2 a.m. The baby is throwing up and spiking a high fever. Your partner is out of town. Your other kid is asleep upstairs. Who are you going to call in the middle of the night? Making that ask is never easy. But why? Why is it so hard to ask for big help, especially when we’re usually grateful to be able to assist a friend in need? Anyone who’s been a parent long enough has been on both the giving and receiving side of that Big Help ask. And when we’re on the receiving end of that kind of request, from a friend we know is struggling, we’re usually really happy– even grateful– to be able to help.  So how can we become “askable friends” and better helpers? And how can we prepare for the big help times in our own lives before they arrive?  In this episode, we discuss the reasons why asking for help can be so hard, especially for mothers when asking for big help is “justified” (and making asking for small help okay) acute needs vs. chronic needs how to really help a struggling friend, rather than saying “let me know if you need anything” some useful ways to help a friend grieving a loss and how we can make that short list of friends, and offer to BE on that short list of friends, before the time comes. In the end, asking for big help is about showing up for ourselves. Here’s how our listener Jennifer put it:  “I can ask for help, even if I can technically handle it, but I just want, or need a break. I don't need to drive myself to the edge of the cliff before I ask.” Here are links to some of the writing on the topic that we discuss in this episode:  ⁠Mayday: Asking For Help In Times Of Need⁠, by Nora Bouchard ⁠lotsahelpinghands.com⁠ (@lotsahelpinghands on Twitter) ⁠Enjoli fragrance commercial ⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why do we avoid small opportunities for connection with strangers, even when humans are wired for that very connection? Behavioral scientist Nicholas Epley, author of the new book A LITTLE MORE SOCIAL, explains why modern life leaves so many people feeling disconnected—and how small social choices can dramatically improve our well-being. Nick explains the science behind loneliness, why humans are biologically wired for connection, and how our fear of awkwardness keeps us from reaching out to others. From conversations with strangers on the subway to helping kids build social confidence, this episode explores how meaningful relationships are created through everyday interactions. The conversation covers: Why people underestimate how much others want connection too How smartphones, remote work, and modern convenience reduce social interaction Why talking to strangers often goes better than we expect The importance of modeling curiosity and openness for children Why meaningful conversations matter more than surface-level similarities How to become “a little more social” through small daily habits Here's where you can find Nick: www.nicholasepley.com Buy A LITTLE MORE SOCIAL: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780593319543 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This week we're talking about how modern teen "dating" has changed—starting with the word itself (it's called "talking" or "hanging out" these days), where today's teens are meeting romantic partners, and how they tend to communicate. We also explain how and why conversations about boundaries, consent, self-worth, and emotional safety should begin earlier than you might think. We also discuss: Why today’s teens are dating later but navigating more online pressure How to encourage to kids maintain other friendships while dating What to do when you dislike your child’s romantic partner Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Emily Baumgaertner Nunn for the NYT: A Predictor of a Good Social Life? Your Parents. Children's Hospital of Richmond at VCU blog: Is your teen ready to date? 6 things to think about Rachel Ehmke for Child Mind Institute: Teens and Romantic Relationships Check out our Fresh Take with Ash Brandin, the Gamer Educator, who has great tips on keeping kids safe online! What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series revisits some of our past episodes on discerning what we need as moms, and then asking for it confidently. Most of us know about Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, the pyramid pattern through which human needs and motivations generally move upward. We can't worry about what's at the upper levels of the pyramid until and unless the more basic needs at the bottom of the pyramid– food, warmth, safety– are met first. Leslie Forde, founder of ⁠Mom’s Hierarchy of Needs⁠, has rethought that pyramid for the way we live our lives as mothers. There's a reason there's not enough bandwidth in our lives for fun and connection and self-actualization. Mom’s Hierarchy of Needs provides moms with products, research and community to reclaim time from their never-done to-do lists. In this episode, Leslie explains: Why mom's hierarchy of needs is a little different than Maslow's When and why your hierarchy of needs might shift How to prioritize your career, healthy relationships, and self-care in your own hierarchy Leslie says that it's important to realize your health and wellbeing is equal in importance to your children's health and wellbeing, and once you internalize that, you can start to make room for your own needs without feeling guilty or frivolous. Here's where you can find Leslie: Facebook: @MOMSHIERARCHYOFNEEDS Twitter: @MOMSHIERARCHY IG: @MOMSHIERARCHYOF_NEEDS ⁠Leslie's TimeCheck app⁠ ⁠https://momshierarchyofneeds.com/⁠ Our episode ⁠"Isn't This Supposed to Be More Fun?"⁠ Sign up for the What Fresh Hell newsletter! Once a month, you’ll get our favorite recent episodes, plus links to other things to read and watch and listen to, and upcoming special events. What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Is social media a good thing for isolated mothers? Or does it just give us more to worry about? Margaret talks with Rachael Shepard-Ohta and Caitlin Wilder, hosts of the podcast You’re So Right, about parenting in the age of Instagram, postpartum mental health, identity outside motherhood, and why parenting advice can feel both helpful and impossible at the same time. Rachael, a former special education teacher and infant parent mental health specialist, and Caitlin, a full spectrum doula and former Bravo producer, explain how they built their podcast as a space for moms to feel less alone. They discuss: Why modern motherhood feels so performative online The pressure to either “love every moment” or be a “hot mess mom” Why nuance in motherhood conversations matters Here's where you can find Rachael and Caitlin: Listen to "You're So Right" wherever you get your podcasts @youresorightpod, @heysleepybaby, and @wilderbeginnings on IG What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We're often told that the American style of parenting is inferior—that we're doing it all wrong compared to, say, a laissez-faire Parisian whose kids eat whatever is served. But is it our too intense/ too lax/ too snack-heavy parenting style that is making us (and our kids) so stressed? Or is it where we're doing that parenting? In this episode, we explore the forces shaping parenting in America today, and the ways in which other countries offer parents more support. From the pressure to “do it all” to the lack of community support, we examine how our American struggles may be rooted in American ideals. There's no doubt cultural expectations can shape our parenting decisions, leading to the "intensive parenting" that's so easy for others to criticize. But there's plenty about our circumstances as American parents that makes things harder. Our friend Janelle Hanchett (whose writing inspired this episode) was exactly right when she wrote: "As much as we may in the US give lip-service to universal healthcare, parental leave, labor rights, and childcare subsidies as key tenets of good parenting, just below these assertions is the implication that if American parents simply tried harder, they would not be so stressed and they would parent better. The narrative bombards American parents relentlessly: Others do it better because they are culturally superior. They are not better people. They live in societies with better policies." Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Jannelle Hanchett on Substack: They aren't better parents because they're culturally superior Claire Cain Miller for the NYT: Today’s Parents: ‘Exhausted, Burned Out and Perpetually Behind’ Reddit/attachmentparenting: Thoughts on “Bringing Up Bébé” book? Kate Cray for The Atlantic: Parenting in America Keeps Getting More Intensive Kate Juilan for The Atlantic: What Happened to American Childhood? Joe Pinsker for The Atlantic: ‘Intensive’ Parenting Is Now the Norm in America Patrick Ishizuka for Social Forces journal: Social Class, Gender, and Contemporary Parenting Standards in the United States: Evidence from a National Survey Experiment Yu-Chin Her for Population Research and Policy Review: Having Fun or Having Kids? Leisure Aspirations and Attitudes Toward Parenthood in Europe Susan Kelley for The Cornell Chronicle: Hands-on, intensive parenting is best, most parents say What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series revisits some of our past episodes about the joys and the challenges that come with raising kids with differences and disabilities. Olivia Martinez-Hauge is a marriage and family therapist specializing in the treatment of families, couples, and individuals who are caregiving for children or adults with neurodiversity. She is also a licensed occupational therapist with over two decades of experience helping children and their families. She is also a mother of three children, two with neurodiversity. In this "Fresh Take" interview, Olivia explains the grief and isolation that might come with special needs parenting her own journey moving past those emotions by parenting "from a place of present" the team of support that a parent of a special needs child needs how we can change our friend groups, schools, and societies to be more supportive of families with children who have special needs Whether you're a parent of a special needs or neurodiverse child, or just want to be a better friend to someone who is, you'll learn so much from this interview. Find out more about Olivia and her work at The Center for Connection and Neurodiversity here: https://www.thecenterforconnection.org/ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why does modern parenting feel so difficult? If a chimpanzee knows what to do without reading a hundred parenting books, why doesn't it just come naturally? Science journalist and author Elizabeth Preston is the author of The Creatures' Guide to Caring: How Animal Parents Teach Us That Humans Were Born to Care. Drawing from animal behavior, evolutionary biology, and neuroscience, this book explains why studying the parenting of every species from poison frogs to bonobos, from rats to birds, can remind us how human parenting is supposed to work—and how parental anxiety may result from the belief we were ever supposed to do things differently. In this episode, we discuss: Why humans are “cooperative breeders” Why maternal anxiety and hypervigilance is an evolutionary advantage, not a personal failure The truth about “mom brain” and what actually happens to the brain during pregnancy Why fathers and non-biological caregivers are equally capable of deep caregiving The role of alloparenting and why kids benefit from many trusted adults Why caregiving is central to what makes us human Here's where you can find Elizabeth: https://elizabethgpreston.com/ @by.elizabeth.preston on IG https://elizabethgpreston.substack.com/ Buy THE CREATURES' GUIDE TO CARING: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780593657102 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

How do you get kids to help out—ever, at all—without default resistance that makes it feel like it's not worth the trouble of your having asked? Kids *should* contribute to their families' lives without their parents resorting to nagging or threats. Kids in other cultures, we are told, participate willingly and fully. Why does this seem so hard for so many of us? We discuss: Whether "chores" framing is part of the problem How gender roles shape the expectations of who's helping Whether they have to like participating for it to matter Why we seem to find this harder than our parents did Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Susan Newman for Psychology Today: Raising Baby Hunter-Gatherer Style Jennifer Katzenstein for Johns Hopkins Medicine Wellness and Prevention blog: How to Get Your Kids to Do Chores Reem Raouda for CNBC Make It: I’ve studied over 200 kids—parents who have an easy time getting their children to listen never use these 5 ‘toxic’ phrases Amy Sutherland for the NYT: What Shamu Taught Me About a Healthy Marriage Frank Bruni for the NYT: Tolstoy and Miss Daisy Deborah Gilboa: GET THE BEHAVIOR YOU WANT...WITHOUT BEING THE PARENT YOU HATE! Our Fresh Take with Michaeleen Doucleff, author of HUNT, GATHER, PARENT Subscribe to our newsletter here! What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series revisits some of our past episodes about the joys and the challenges that come with raising kids with differences and disabilities. What if we're looking at autism in the wrong way? Dr. Lynn Koegel, co-author of ⁠Hidden Brilliance: Unlocking the Intelligence of Autism⁠, explains how to engage with the strengths in kids with autism rather than focusing on what they're lacking. ⁠Dr. Lynn Koegel⁠ is a clinical professor at the Stanford School of Medicine. She and her husband developed Pivotal Response Treatment which focuses on motivation. She has been supporting autistic individuals for more than 40 years. Dr. Koegel and Margaret discuss: Why we're focusing on the wrong things when we assess kids with autism The power of peer support Connecting authentically with kids with autism Dr. Koegel explains that professionals are often trained to look at what's "wrong" with children with autism rather than what's right. It helps to look at the differences in children with autism, as Margaret likes to say, as morally neutral. Here's where you can find Lynn: ⁠autismPRThelp.com⁠ ⁠@lynn.koegel on Facebook⁠ ⁠hidden-brilliance.org⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Are women really better at all the things we do? Or are we just used to doing more? Amy talks with sociologist and author Leah Ruppanner, author of the new book DRAINED, about her definition of the "mental load" and why so many women feel constantly overwhelmed. Leah defines the mental load as much more than keeping track of tasks. It’s deeply emotional work tied to caring for others, anticipating needs, and managing relationships. In this interview Leah breaks down the different types of mental load, from organizing daily life to providing emotional support, maintaining relationships, creating special moments for families, and supporting everyone else’s goals. While many partners contribute in visible ways, much of this broader, invisible work still falls to women. Leah also shares a practical framework for evaluating your mental load: understanding where your energy is going, who you’re carrying, and what you can delegate, drop, or rebalance. When reducing the load isn’t possible, rest and recovery become essential. Think of yourself as the family MVP. This episode is a reminder that the mental load is real, complex, and worth examining—and that making it visible is the first step toward meaningful change. Here's where you can find Leah: @prof.leahruppanner on Instagram, TikTok The Miss Perceived Podcast https://www.leahruppanner.com Buy DRAINED: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780593850909 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What is emotional intelligence, exactly? Is it the yin to IQ's yang? Is it equally crucial to our success and well-being? In this episode we talk about what EQ (or EI, depending on who you're asking) actually means, why it matters, and whether it can be taught to both adults and kids. We discuss: The four core components of emotional intelligence: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship skills (plus what's been taken off the list) Why emotional intelligence is morally neutral Why neurodivergent kids may experience emotional intelligence differently Practical ways to help kids build emotional intelligence Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Suzanne Ross for The Explainer: What is emotional intelligence and why do you need it? Crystal Ott for Ohio University Extension: What is Emotional Intelligence? Daniel Goleman on LinkedIn: The Four Domains of Emotional Intelligence Adam Grant for Medium: The Dark Side of Emotional Intelligence Peg Rosen for Understood.org: Emotional intelligence: What it means for kids Brigham Young University: Study visually captures hard truth: Walking home at night is not the same for women University of Cambridge Judge Business School: The psychologist who reminds us that emotions affect our working lives Find all of our guests' books, as well as books we personally recommend: https://bookshop.org/shop/whatfreshhellcast What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series revisits some of our past episodes about the joys and the challenges that come with raising kids with differences and disabilities. Kate Swenson writes and creates videos about her life as a mother of four and and an autism advocate for ⁠"Finding Cooper's Voice⁠," a living, thriving community of people who not only advocate for autism, but also make the world a better place for individuals with disabilities and their families. We discuss Kate's book ⁠Forever Boy: A Mother's Memoir of Autism and Finding Joy⁠ and her nonprofit ⁠The More Than Project, ⁠which supports the needs of special needs families that go beyond the needs of their special needs child. Kate tells us about: Kate's journey to finding the correct diagnosis for her child what led her to put her story out into the world the sometimes-loneliness of special needs parenting, and how the Finding Cooper's Voice community offers insight, support, and fellowship Get FOREVER BOY in our Bookshop store: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780778311997 and follow @findingcoopersvoice on Facebook and Instagram. What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What happens when childhood becomes content? Journalist Fortesa Latifi, author of the new book LIKE, FOLLOW, SUBSCRIBE, discusses the rise of influencer families and the growing world of kid influencers. We explore how parenting content has evolved from "mommy blogs" to today’s visual and monetized social media landscape, where children are often at the center of viral content. Fortesa explains why family vlogging is so compelling, and the powerful parasocial relationships audiences form with influencer families. She also breaks down the ethical gray areas of sharing kids online, including issues of privacy, consent, and the long-term digital footprint created for children who cannot fully understand or agree to their online presence. Fortesa discusses the role of viewers in driving demand for this content and the emerging legal efforts to regulate earnings and protect influencer kids. She offers a nuanced look at family vlogging, encouraging parents and audiences alike to think more critically about what it means to share children’s lives online. Here's where you can find Fortesa: https://www.fortesalatifi.com @hifortesa on socials Buy LIKE, FOLLOW, SUBSCRIBE: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781668080504 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What are the parenting milestones no one tells you about—but that completely change your daily life? We asked our listeners about the little wins of parenting that make a huge difference in reducing the day-to-day chaos, from kids pouring their own cereal to finally being able to leave them home alone. Listen to our interview with Christina Martin here Subscribe to our YouTube channel! What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This Deep Dive series is about embracing the joys and acknowledging the challenges that come with raising kids with differences and disabilities. How do we celebrate and encourage kids with disabilities and differences, without letting our fears and preconceptions dictate what we think they can do? How do parents of kids with less understanding of differences and disabilities allow for children's natural curiosity? Meg Zucker, author of the book ⁠Born Extraordinary: Empowering Children with Differences & Disabilities⁠, was born with a genetic condition called ectrodactyly. She is also the mother of three children, two of whom share this difference. Meg is also the founder and president of Don’t Hide It, Flaunt It, a non-profit with the mission of advancing understanding, tolerance, and mutual respect for people's differences. In this episode Meg and Amy discuss: "Disability" versus "difference," and how people choose the words that feel right for them How Meg's experience growing up different made her parenting kids with differences a little easier—though maybe not as much as someone outside that experience might expect the well-meaning "thrusting of help" that we might reconsider Here's where you can find Meg: @MegZucker @Justflauntit_ Buy Meg's book: ⁠https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780593419380⁠ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

As kids prepare to leave home for college, we tend to wonder: have we taught them everything they need to know? Christina Geist—author of Before You Fly Away: Life Lessons from Home—shares how this transition can feel like a “parental report card.” Christina's late-night reflections and “mini panic moments" as her child prepared to leave for college became a collection of concise life lessons meant to guide her child toward independence. But the process also turned out to provide a way for Christina to process her own fears and hopes. Parents often harbor fear that things won’t go perfectly once kids leave home. Christina acknowledges that college—and life—will include mistakes, loneliness, and challenges. But those “blind spots” are actually essential. Growth happens when kids figure things out on their own, whether it’s resolving roommate conflicts or navigating new responsibilities. As Christina puts it: “Figure it out. You’re 100% capable.” Here's where you can find Christina: www.christinageist.com Buy BEFORE YOU FLY AWAY: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9798881612023 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why do we cling to what’s familiar—even when it’s not working? In this episode we explore why humans are wired to avoid uncertainty, and how that shapes our decisions and our parenting. We discuss the Ellsberg Paradox, which explains why we often choose “the devil we know” over potentially better—but unknown—options. Whether it’s staying in a situation that no longer serves us, avoiding difficult conversations, or overthinking every possible outcome, our brains are constantly trying to reduce uncertainty—even at a cost. We discuss how the brain’s fear center (the amygdala) reacts more strongly to ambiguity than to actual risk, triggering stress responses like anxiety, overthinking, and catastrophizing. This helps explain why uncertainty can feel so overwhelming—even when nothing is actually wrong. We discuss Dr. Rue Wilson's notion of “toxic time travel" and how our search for reassurance pulls us out of the present into either mentally replaying the past or imagining worst-case futures, keeping us stuck in cycles of worry. We also explore how this shows up in parenting. Kids who resist new situations, struggle with transitions, or seem overly anxious may not be reacting to real danger—but to uncertainty itself. Understanding this can help us respond with more empathy and curiosity rather than frustration. Finally, we share practical strategies for managing uncertainty—for ourselves and our kids: Separating real risk from fear of the unknown Using curiosity instead of rumination Reality-checking anxious thoughts Focusing on what’s within our control Grounding ourselves in the present moment Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: ambiguity aversion Tara Cousineau for Harvard Graduate School of Arts and Sciences: Coping with Uncertainty Lauren Arcuri for the American Physiological Society: The Brain's Response to Uncertainty and Ambiguity Gretchen Rubin: How to Make Tough Decisions: Choose the Bigger Life Dorie Clark on Instagram: Your Brain Is Lying to You About Risk What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In honor of Women's History Month, this "Deep Dive" series highlights some of our past interview episodes about raising daughters. Janice Johnson Dias⁠ is a professor of sociology at John Jay College, and author of ⁠PARENT LIKE IT MATTERS: HOW TO RAISE JOYFUL, CHANGE-MAKING GIRLS⁠⁠. Her collaborative work on black girls’ mental, sexual, and physical health issues earned her a special Congressional recognition. In this conversation, Janice explains how we can embolden both our daughters and our sons to find their passions– but only by finding our own passions first. Janice argues that change-making is the path to true joy. You can find PARENT LIKE IT MATTERS here in our Bookshop store: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781984819628 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ What Fresh Hell podcast, mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent,  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why is it so hard to read more—even when we want to, even when we have stacks of books awaiting us on our bedside tables? We sit down with Meredith Monday Schwartz—co-host of the The Currently Reading Podcast—to talk about how to reconnect with reading in a way that feels joyful, flexible, and realistic. If you’ve ever felt obliged to finish a book you hated, or berate yourself for the time you spend scrolling instead of reading, this conversation is for you. It’s not that there aren’t good books out there. It’s that our phones are designed to win. Picking up a book requires focus and intention—two things that feel increasingly scarce. But reading offers a deeper kind of satisfaction than screens. Books can provide immersion, rest, perspective, and even emotional connection. Meredith argues that reading isn’t just a habit. It's a form of meaningful self-care. Stepping away—even briefly—can leave you more refreshed, focused, and able to engage with the world when you return. Meredith also argues for “delicious reads” over "should reads." Forcing yourself through something that doesn’t work for you can lead to burnout—and even stop you from reading altogether. Reader, Know Thyself A central theme of the conversation is learning what kind of reader you are. (Take the "What Kind of Reader Are You?" quiz here!) Understanding your preferences helps you: Choose books you’ll actually finish Avoid common “deal breakers” Create a reading routine that fits your life Permission to Not Finish (DNF) Books If you’ve ever forced yourself to finish a book you weren’t enjoying, this is your official permission slip to stop. Meredith is a strong advocate for DNF (“Did Not Finish”), with a twist: sometimes it’s not a “no,” it’s a “not right now.” A book that doesn’t resonate today might become a favorite later in life. Letting go of a book that isn’t working frees you to find one that does—and can instantly reignite your reading momentum. How to Get Back Into Reading Feeling stuck? Meredith shares simple, practical strategies to help you ease back into reading: Start small: Commit to just 15–20 minutes at a time Pair reading with a routine: Try reading during a bath or before bed Use multiple formats: Audiobooks, Ebooks, and print can all coexist Create a “book flight”: Sample the first few pages of several books and choose what grabs you Always have options: Keep a list of appealing reads ready to go If your kids used to love books but now prefer screens, you’re not alone. The most effective strategy? Model reading yourself. When kids see you enjoying books, it sends a powerful message that reading is valuable and enjoyable. There’s no quick fix—but there is long-term impact. Here's where you can find Meredith: IG @meredithmondayschwartz or @currentlyreadingpodcast The Currently Reading Podcast wherever you get your podcasts! View the list of all the books Meredith recommends in our Bookshop What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Why is it so hard to get some kids to read—and is it even our job to make them love it? We tackle the reality of raising reluctant readers in a world dominated by screens. From decoding disorders to disinterest, we break down the different reasons kids struggle with reading—and why understanding the “why” matters more than forcing the habit. We share practical, judgment-free strategies to help kids engage with books and how parental expectations, school pressures, and comparison culture can complicate our relationship with reading. In this episode, we discuss: Why kids become reluctant readers (and the different types) Supporting kids with learning differences like dyslexia Why forcing “worthy” books can backfire Letting go of the pressure to raise kids who love reading Sign up for our newsletter here! Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Common Sense Media: Books for Reluctant Readers Amy Mascott for PBS Kids for Parents: What to Do When Your Child Hates Reading Susan Dominus for NYT: Motherhood, Screened Off Linda Flanagan for KQED: How Audiobooks Can Help Kids Who Struggle with Reading Mary Ann Scheuer’s Great Kid Books blog Campbell University: Alumni Experts: 6 Ways to Engage Reluctant Readers Scholastic Parents: The Five Finger Rule for Reading Will Help Your Child Find a 'Just-Right' Book Dawn Adkins for Providence Classical School blog: 10 Ways to Help Kids Choose Books Over Screens Jamie Martin for Understood.org: Do audiobooks get in the way of learning to read? What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ What Fresh Hell podcast, mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, parenting reluctant readers, kids reading habits, how to get kids to read, children and screen time, reading motivation for kids, reluctant reader strategies, audiobooks for kids, graphic novels for children, parenting tips reading, literacy development children, encouraging kids to read, reading vs screens, family reading routines, struggling readers support, dyslexia and reading, independent reading skills, raising readers, reading comprehension kids, parenting challenges reading, kids and books Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In honor of Women's History Month, this "Deep Dive" series highlights some of our past interview episodes about raising daughters. Donna Jackson Nakazawa is an award-winning science journalist whose work explores the intersection of neuroscience, immunology, and emotion. In, ⁠GIRLS ON THE BRINK: Helping Our Daughters Thrive in an Era of Increased Anxiety, Depression, and Social Media⁠, she unpacks the causes of the stress on American girls and its detrimental effects on their mental health. In this interview, we discuss: Why girls tend to be more depressed and anxious than boys How we've stolen girls' "safe in-between years" "Antidote" strategies for helping girls through adolescence Here's where you can find Donna: ⁠https://donnajacksonnakazawa.com⁠ @donnajacksonnakazawaauthor on Facebook ⁠Buy Donna's book!⁠ Sign up for the What Fresh Hell newsletter! Once a month you’ll get our favorite recent episodes, plus links to other things to read and watch and listen to, and upcoming special events:  ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/newsletter/ What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠⁠⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ What Fresh Hell podcast, mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, girls mental health, teen girl anxiety, teen girl depression, parenting daughters, social media and girls, adolescent brain development, why are girls more anxious than boys, helping girls through adolescence, girls and depression statistics, middle school girls mental health, neuroscience of anxiety, immunology and mental health, stress in teenage girls, protecting girls mental health, parenting in the age of social media, girls and self esteem, safe in-between years, raising resilient daughters, girls emotional development, mental health strategies for teens Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

How can we best support our neurodivergent kids? Jessica Shaw, host of the podcast Everyone Gets a Juice Box, discusses the realities of raising neurodivergent kids—and the emotional, practical, and often isolating journey parents navigate along the way. Jessica shares how the concept of neurodiversity has evolved, why the “big tent” of neurodivergence can feel both supportive and lonely, and how parents can find connection through shared experience. Together, Jessica and Margaret unpack the challenges of seeking diagnoses, trusting parental instincts, and navigating conflicting advice from professionals and peers. They also answer some listener questions about raising neurodiverse kids. Here's where you can find Jessica: www.understood.org Listen to "Everyone Gets a Juice Box" here (and wherever you get your podcasts) What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠ mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, neurodivergent parenting, raising neurodivergent kids, neurodiversity in children, parenting special needs children, autism ADHD parenting, parenting teens with special needs, neurodivergent teens independence, special needs parenting support, parenting podcast neurodiversity, emotional challenges of parenting, early diagnosis neurodivergence, parenting community support, traveling with neurodivergent child, sensory needs children tips Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What does it really mean to “age gracefully”—and who decided that was the goal in the first place? We unpack the cultural pressure on women to look younger for longer—and what we can do to resist it. From celebrity beauty standards and the billion-dollar anti-aging industry to the “mask of aging,” we explore why the gap between how we feel and how we look can become so jarring. We dig into: the rise of “stretched middle age” and “looksmaxxing” why we compare ourselves to unrealistic, often artificial ideals the impact of these messages on our kids—and how to interrupt the cycle Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Séraphine Roger for Vanity Fair: Short-Haired Demi Moore (And Her Dog) Stun At Gucci Kate Manne's Substack More to Hate Teresa Karpinska for Vogue: Was the Term “Ageing Gracefully” Coined by Men? Sarah Miller for The New Yorker: Desperate for Botox Meagan Fredette for W Magazine: Julianne Moore is Sick of the Term “Aging Gracefully” Becca Rothfeld for The New Yorker: The Captivating Derangement of the Looksmaxxing Movement Amber Wardell, Ph.D., for Psychology Today: The Paradox of Women’s Aging Barański, Jarosław for Hybris 32: Mask and Shame of Ageing Meredith Jones for The Journal of Popular Culture: “Skintight: An Anatomy of Cosmetic Surgery” What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠ mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, aging gracefully myth, anti aging culture, women and aging, body image psychology, motherhood and identity, beauty standards media, aging and self image, mask of aging psychology, looksmaxxing trend, female aging pressure, parenting and body image, cultural expectations women, self acceptance aging, modern motherhood podcast Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In honor of Women's History Month, this "Deep Dive" series highlights some of our past interview episodes about raising daughters. Why are stereotypes of teenage girls rarely flattering? And even worse, what important traits are we not acknowledging in these young women? ⁠Chelsey Goodan⁠, author of ⁠UNDERESTIMATED: The Wisdom and Power of Teenage Girls⁠, explains what teenage girls really want and need from us. Chelsey and Amy discuss: The generational shift towards a culture of support and empowerment among young girls today The significance of offering agency to young girls in shaping their identities and futures What teenage girls want from their parents more than anything else Here's where you can find Chelsey: ⁠https://www.chelseygoodan.com⁠ @chelseygoodan on IG and X Buy UNDERSTIMATED: ⁠https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781668032688⁠ ⁠https://www.democrashe.org/⁠ ⁠https://www.acalltomen.org/about/⁠ Amy also mentions our Fresh Take with Judith Warner in this episode: https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/fresh-take-judith-warner-on-what-grownups-get-wrong-about-middle-school/ We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠ mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, teenage girl, female empowerment, feminism, mentorship for teens, gender equity Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What does dopamine actually do to our brains—and to our kids' brains? We welcome back science journalist and parenting expert Michaeleen Doucleff to discuss her latest book, DOPAMINE KIDS. After years as an NPR science reporter, and after writing the bestselling HUNT, GATHER, PARENT, Doucleff began noticing something unsettling in her own life: even during beautiful moments with her daughter, she felt pulled toward her phone. That realization led her to explore the powerful role of dopamine, the brain chemical tied to reward, motivation, and habit formation—and how modern technology and ultra-processed foods are designed to trigger it. In this conversation, Amy and Doucleff discuss how the dopamine-driven design of both screens and ultra-processed foods affects both kids and parents, often making it harder for families to reduce the use of these things in the home. They also explore practical ways families can reclaim attention, connection, and balance in a world full of digital distractions. Here' s where you can find Michaeleen: www.michaeleendoucleff.com Buy DOPAMINE KIDS: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781668049839 What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠ mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, dopamine kids, Michaeleen Doucleff, dopamine and screens, parenting and technology, kids and smartphones, screen addiction kids, dopamine parenting, digital distraction families, parenting podcast technology, healthy screen habits kids, raising kids in the digital age Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

First, we’re setting aside our own hopes and dreams to have (and raise) our kids. Then, we’re relentlessly mocked (perhaps correctly) for being overinvested in the fourth-grade luau. Are we living through our kids? And how do we stop? Psychologists have long said that mothers transfer our own unfulfilled ambition onto our children. “Symbolic self-completion theory” suggests that we look to our children as symbols of ourselves, and transfer our ambitions to them— which is why we’re not jealous when they get the big part in the school play; we’re a little too thrilled. Sing out, Louise! But as psychologist Wendy Mogel reminds us, our children are not our masterpieces , and pushing them towards our own notions of greatness prevents them from becoming the humans they are meant to be. In this episode, we discuss the pitfalls of “achievement by proxy distortion” and how to take a step back if you find yourself a little too enmeshed. Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Our Fresh Take with Wendy Mogel Wendy Mogel: BLESSING OF A SKINNED KNEE Our episode "Pushing Kids the Just-Right Amount" What Fresh Hell is co-hosted by Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website: ⁠https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/⁠ mom friends, funny moms, parenting advice, parenting experts, parenting tips, mothers, families, parenting skills, parenting strategies, parenting styles, busy moms, self-help for moms, manage kid’s behavior, teenager, tween, child development, family activities, family fun, parent child relationship, decluttering, kid-friendly, invisible workload, default parent, living through your kids, parenting psychology, ambition transference, symbolic self completion theory, achievement by proxy distortion, youth sports parents, parenting expectations, supporting kids passions, parenting identity, parenting advice podcast, parenting and ambition, modern parenting challenges Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices