The Angry Therapist Podcast

In this re-release, I answer five of the most common questions I get about love, relationships, and emotional well-being. I also share five daily reminders to help you reconnect with yourself and support your healing. In this episode, I answer: Why do I keep attracting emotionally unavailable people? Is it love or just attachment? Should love be easy, or should it take work? How do I know if I'm settling in my relationship? Why do healthy relationships feel boring after toxic ones? Need advice? Ask Angry! Call (323) 487-2159 anytime and leave a voicemail. Your question could be featured on the podcast! Costa Rica Retreat | November 9–13 This isn't a vacation. It's a reset.https://surfsexandpancakes.com/ 31 Days to Get Out of Your Own Way Break old patterns and turn insight into action.https://nas.com/therapist-membership-qa-space/challenges/31-days-to-get-out-of-your-own-way Secure Self Course Ready for deeper work?https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/ Connect with me: My latest book: Breaking Confidentiality https://breakingconfidentiality.com/#/john/pre-order Soulprint | My publishing company https://www.soulprintmedia.co Love Hard On Purpose https://www.harpercollins.com/products/love-hard-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=44339801227298 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theangrytherapist/ Website: https://www.theangrytherapist.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ever feel like your mind is telling you you're fine, but your body is saying something completely different? You're overwhelmed, constantly on edge, or struggling to slow down. And no matter how many times you tell yourself to relax, you just can't seem to switch off. In today's re-release, I'm revisiting a conversation about how to calm your nervous system, manage stress, and find your way back to feeling grounded. Because sometimes, it's not about changing what's happening around you. It's about learning how to respond to what's happening inside you. In this episode: How to calm your nervous system when you're feeling overwhelmed Understanding stress and emotional regulation Why slowing down can feel harder than it sounds Learning to reconnect with yourself when life feels overwhelming If you've been feeling stressed, anxious, or like you're constantly running on empty, this episode is worth revisiting. What if the first step to feeling better isn't doing more, but learning how to slow down? Originally released June 17, 2022. I have a four-day immersion designed to shake loose the old operating system you've been living from and help you build a new one - one rooted in flow, connection, joy, and nervous system regulation.November 9-13 | Costa Rica THIS ISN'T A VACATION. IT'S A RESET. Perfect for beginners If you feel the pull. Stay with it. Don't miss out on the next retreat. The next retreat will be from November 9-13 https://surfsexandpancakes.com/ If you’re tired of knowing what you need to change but still repeating the same patterns, 31 Days to Get Out of Your Own Way is for you. For 31 days, we’ll work on closing the gap between insight and action through structure, accountability, and ownership. Less analyzing yourself. More making different choices and actually changing your life. Learn more and join here:https://nas.com/therapist-membership-qa-space/challenges/31-days-to-get-out-of-your-own-way 🎙️ CONNECT WITH ME: 📘 My upcoming book: Breaking ConfidentialityPre-order here: https://breakingconfidentiality.com/#/john/pre-order 📘 Love Hard On PurposeToss the blueprints. Build something honest.https://www.harpercollins.com/products/love-hard-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=44339801227298 My book publishing company: Soulprinthttps://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress: Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell Youhttps://breakingconfidentiality.com/ Follow me on Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/theangrytherapist/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What does it feel like to return to the country where you were born after 50 years? I'm back in South Korea for the first time since leaving as a child, and the experience has brought up memories, emotions, and parts of my identity I haven't connected with in decades. From exploring Seoul and Busan to rediscovering the food and culture I once felt embarrassed about growing up, I reflect on what it means to reconnect with your roots, see your childhood through a different lens, and experience a place that's both familiar and completely new. I talk about: Returning to South Korea for the first time in 50 years My first impressions of Seoul and Busan Rediscovering Korean food, language, and culture Growing up Korean American and feeling pressure to fit in How the things I once felt ashamed of became sources of pride Revisiting childhood memories and reconnecting with my identity The unexpected emotions that come with returning to your birthplace Why travel can be an important part of personal growth Learning to stop postponing meaningful experiences If this episode resonated with you, be sure to follow the podcast, leave a rating, and share it with someone who might need to hear it. I have a four-day immersion designed to shake loose the old operating system you've been living from and help you build a new one - one rooted in flow, connection, joy, and nervous system regulation. November 9-13 | Costa Rica THIS ISN'T A VACATION. IT'S A RESET. Perfect for beginners If you feel the pull. Stay with it. Don't miss out on the next retreat. The next retreat will be from November 9-13 https://surfsexandpancakes.com/ If you’re tired of knowing what you need to change but still repeating the same patterns, 31 Days to Get Out of Your Own Way is for you. For 31 days, we’ll work on closing the gap between insight and action through structure, accountability, and ownership. Less analyzing yourself. More making different choices and actually changing your life. Learn more and join here: https://nas.com/therapist-membership-qa-space/challenges/31-days-to-get-out-of-your-own-way 🎙️ Connect with me: My New Book: Breaking Confidentiality — Learn More & Pre-Order https://breakingconfidentiality.com/#/john/pre-order My book publishing company, Soulprint: https://www.soulprintmedia.co If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available here: https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/ Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theangrytherapist/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What if the hardest chapters of your life are actually setting you up for something you can't see yet? I've been through divorce, lost my home, started over in my fifties, and questioned who I was more times than I can count. And now, looking back, I'm beginning to connect the dots. In this episode, I'm taking you on a walk through Costa Rica to talk about the stories we tell ourselves, how we make sense of our past, and why changing our perspective can change our lives. We get into: Finding meaning in difficult experiences Starting over and letting go of old identities How your relationship with yourself shapes your reality Why life's biggest setbacks might eventually make sense I'm not saying everything happens for a reason or that changing your mindset magically fixes everything. But what if you're not stuck? What if you're just in the middle of a chapter that hasn't made sense yet? Your story is the most powerful thing you'll ever own. And maybe your hardest chapter isn't the ending. 🌴 November 9–13 | Costa Rica Retreat31 Days to Get Out of Your Own Way THIS ISN'T A VACATION. IT'S A RESET. Sometimes the next chapter of your story begins with stepping away from the life you've been living. My four-day Costa Rica immersion is designed to help you shake loose the old operating system you've been living from and build something new — rooted in flow, connection, joy, and nervous system regulation. A chance to reconnect with yourself, let go of old patterns, and explore what's next. Perfect for beginners. If you feel the pull, stay with it. November 9–13 | Costa Rica https://surfsexandpancakes.com/ Changing your story starts with making different choices. If you're tired of knowing what you need to change but still repeating the same patterns, 31 Days to Get Out of Your Own Way is for you. For 31 days, we'll work on closing the gap between insight and action through structure, accountability, and ownership. Less analyzing yourself. More making different choices and actually changing your life. Learn more and join here: https://nas.com/therapist-membership-qa-space/challenges/31-days-to-get-out-of-your-own-way 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My upcoming book, Breaking Confidentiality: Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You. An honest, unfiltered look behind the therapy room door, revealing the human side of being a therapist and the things we rarely talk about. Pre-order here: https://www.kobo.com/us/es/ebook/breaking-confidentiality-sh-t-your-therapist-would-never-tell-you My book publishing company, Soulprint: https://www.soulprintmedia.co If you're ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available here: https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/ 📘 Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose.: https://www.harpercollins.com/products/break-up-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=42305553956898 Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theangrytherapist/ Find out more: https://www.theangrytherapist.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

At 53, I've realized that some of life's biggest lessons aren't about getting ahead. They're about learning when to take the leap, when to let go, how to love without losing yourself, and how to stop waiting for some future version of your life before you start living. In this episode, I share 12 life lessons that have shaped the way I think about relationships, personal growth, success, and happiness. I talk about why being single isn't a waiting room, how our childhood experiences can influence what we mistake for intuition, and why becoming a better version of yourself sometimes means reconnecting with the person you used to be. I also explore the importance of traveling, finding meaning in everyday experiences, allowing things to end without calling them failures, and resisting the pressure to turn every passion into something profitable. Ultimately, these lessons are about creating a life that feels honest and meaningful, rather than spending years chasing someone else's definition of success. IN THIS EPISODE: • Why confidence comes after taking action, not before• Making the most of singlehood instead of waiting for a relationship• The difference between healthy compromise and self-abandonment• How childhood patterns influence attraction and intuition• Reconnecting with your younger self and rediscovering curiosity• How traveling changes your perspective• Recognizing endings as experiences rather than failures• Finding joy in ordinary Tuesdays• Allowing hobbies to exist without financial expectations• Questioning the life blueprints you've inherited• Why belonging shouldn't require betraying your truth• Choosing a life that feels alive rather than one that just looks impressive If you enjoyed this episode, subscribe for more conversations about relationships, healing, personal growth, and building a more intentional life. Leave a comment sharing which of these 12 lessons resonated with you most, and share this episode with someone who's ready to start living more intentionally. NOVEMBER 9–13 | COSTA RICA THIS ISN'T A VACATION. IT'S A RESET. A four-day immersion designed to shake loose the old operating system you've been living from and help you build a new one — one rooted in flow, connection, joy, and nervous system regulation. Perfect for beginners. If you feel the pull, stay with it. Don't miss out on the next retreat. The next retreat will be from November 9–13. https://surfsexandpancakes.com/ 31 DAYS TO GET OUT OF YOUR OWN WAY If you’re tired of knowing what you need to change but still repeating the same patterns, 31 Days to Get Out of Your Own Way is for you. For 31 days, we’ll work on closing the gap between insight and action through structure, accountability, and ownership. Less analyzing yourself. More making different choices and actually changing your life. Learn more and join here: https://nas.com/therapist-membership-qa-space/challenges/31-days-to-get-out-of-your-own-way 🎙️ CONNECT WITH ME 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://www.harpercollins.com/products/love-hard-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=44339801227298 My book publishing company, Soulprint: https://www.soulprintmedia.co If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available here: https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/ 📘 Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose.: https://www.harpercollins.com/products/break-up-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=42305553956898 Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theangrytherapist/ Find out more: https://www.theangrytherapist.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Resentment rarely comes from one big moment. More often, it builds through the small things we don't talk about: the dishes, the forgotten gestures, the mental load, and the feeling that you're the only one making an effort. I talk about how these everyday frustrations become evidence of deeper hurt, why unresolved conflict makes resentment grow, and how to repair the damage before years of disappointment turn into distance. I talk about: • How small moments of hurt build into long-term resentment • The invisible mental load of maintaining a relationship • Why the dishes are rarely just about the dishes • How the stories we tell ourselves amplify frustration • Asking for what you need before it becomes a demand • Why conflict is inevitable but repair is essential • Creating a safe space for difficult conversations • Using empathy, self-awareness, and accountability to repair emotional wounds If you’re tired of knowing what you need to change but still repeating the same patterns, 31 Days to Get Out of Your Own Way is for you. For 31 days, we’ll work on closing the gap between insight and action through structure, accountability, and ownership. Less analyzing yourself. More making different choices and actually changing your life. Learn more and join here: https://nas.com/therapist-membership-qa-space/challenges/31-days-to-get-out-of-your-own-way 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://www.harpercollins.com/products/love-hard-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=44339801227298 My book publishing company, Soulprint: https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress, Sht Your Therapist Would Never Tell You, on Substack: https://substack.com/@theangrytherapist If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available here: https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/ 📘 Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose.: https://www.harpercollins.com/products/break-up-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=42305553956898 Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/theangrytherapist/ Find out more: https://www.theangrytherapist.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What does genuine love actually look like? It may have less to do with how someone makes you feel and more to do with whether you can truly see them, allow them to be themselves, and continue meeting them as both of you change. I also explore what happens when fear of losing someone keeps us from fully enjoying the relationship we have today, how relationships teach us who we are becoming, and the difference between healthy compromise and losing yourself. I also look at what can exist underneath betrayal and affairs, including the desire to reconnect with a version of yourself that feels lost. I talk about: • What genuine love looks like beyond attraction and chemistry • Loving someone without abandoning yourself • Why we have to keep meeting our partners as they change • The fear of losing someone and how it can steal the present • Why the small, ordinary moments in a relationship matter • Asking what a relationship is teaching you to become • The difference between compromise and self-abandonment • How relationships can teach us to expand or shrink ourselves • What can be underneath affairs and betrayal • The different emotional realities of the betrayed partner, the person who cheated, and the affair partner If you’re tired of knowing what you need to change but still repeating the same patterns, 31 Days to Get Out of Your Own Way is for you. For 31 days, we’ll work on closing the gap between insight and action through structure, accountability, and ownership. Less analyzing yourself. More making different choices and actually changing your life. Learn more and join here:https://nas.com/therapist-membership-qa-space/challenges/31-days-to-get-out-of-your-own-way 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest.https://www.harpercollins.com/products/love-hard-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=44339801227298 My book publishing company, Soulprint:https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress, Sht Your Therapist Would Never Tell You, on Substack:*https://substack.com/@theangrytherapist If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available here:https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/ 📘 Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose.:https://www.harpercollins.com/products/break-up-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=42305553956898 Follow me on Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/theangrytherapist/ Find out more:https://www.theangrytherapist.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We were handed a blueprint for what a “good life” is supposed to look like: fall in love, get married, buy the house, have kids, build a career, and stay together. But what happens when you achieve the life you were supposed to want and realize it doesn’t actually feel like yours? I talk about breaking away from inherited ideas of happiness, questioning the lives we’re maintaining simply because we’ve already spent years building them, and creating something more honest and customized. I also answer questions about open relationships, getting over self-doubt after leaving a good person, and why a relationship can be meaningful without lasting forever. I talk about: • The blueprint we inherit for what a “good life” is supposed to look like• Getting everything you were supposed to want and still feeling unhappy• The difference between a good life and a life that actually feels like yours• Redefining marriage, family, success, wealth, and commitment• Breaking patterns and questioning what you’re maintaining simply because you’ve already built it• Whether open relationships can work and what needs to be addressed before opening one• Why changing relationship structures doesn’t automatically fix existing problems• Getting over self-doubt after breaking up with a good person• Why someone can be a good person and still not be your person anymore• Letting relationships be meaningful without needing them to last forever If you’re tired of knowing what you need to change but still repeating the same patterns, 31 Days to Get Out of Your Own Way is for you. For 31 days, we’ll work on closing the gap between insight and action through structure, accountability, and ownership. Less analyzing yourself. More making different choices and actually changing your life. Learn more and join here:https://nas.com/therapist-membership-qa-space/challenges/31-days-to-get-out-of-your-own-way 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest.https://www.harpercollins.com/products/love-hard-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=44339801227298 My book publishing company, Soulprint:https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress, Sht Your Therapist Would Never Tell You, on Substack:*https://substack.com/@theangrytherapist If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available here:https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/ 📘 Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose.:https://www.harpercollins.com/products/break-up-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=42305553956898 Follow me on Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/theangrytherapist/ Find out more:https://www.theangrytherapist.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Being in love and loving someone aren’t always the same thing. Being in love can be about chemistry, longing, fantasy, desire, and the way someone makes you feel. But loving someone asks something harder: can you keep seeing who they actually are as they change? Can you stay curious about the person they’re becoming instead of holding them to the version you first fell for? In this episode, I talk about why intensity alone isn’t enough to build a life with someone, why long-term relationships can go through seasons where the love feels different, and why falling out of love doesn’t automatically mean the relationship is over. I also get into what happens after betrayal when you’re still watching an ex’s life and waiting for them to suffer, fail, or finally understand what they did to you. At some point, healing means taking your attention back and putting it somewhere they no longer get to participate in. And I answer one of the questions I hear most: how do you know whether your marriage is going through a hard season or whether the relationship is actually ending? In this episode, I talk about: • The difference between being in love and loving someone• Why intensity and chemistry aren’t enough• Loving someone as they grow and change• Why we sometimes miss who we were in a relationship more than the person• Three questions to ask when looking back on a past relationship• Why falling in and out of love can be part of a long-term relationship• How to stop making an ex’s life evidence for your own• Why healing can require teaching your attention a new address• The difference between a hard season and a relationship that may be ending• Why movement, ownership, and changed behavior matter more than promises Sometimes love isn’t about getting back to who you used to be together. Sometimes it’s about deciding whether you still want to know and choose the people you’re becoming. If you’re tired of knowing what you need to change but still repeating the same patterns, 31 Days to Get Out of Your Own Way is for you. For 31 days, we’ll work on closing the gap between insight and action through structure, accountability, and ownership. Less analyzing yourself. More making different choices and actually changing your life. Learn more and join here:https://nas.com/therapist-membership-qa-space/challenges/31-days-to-get-out-of-your-own-way 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest.https://www.harpercollins.com/products/love-hard-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=44339801227298 My book publishing company, Soulprint:https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress, Sht Your Therapist Would Never Tell You, on Substack:*https://substack.com/@theangrytherapist If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available here:https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/ 📘 Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose.:https://www.harpercollins.com/products/break-up-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=42305553956898 Follow me on Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/theangrytherapist/ Find out more:https://www.theangrytherapist.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What happens when one person is willing to grow and the other isn’t, why growth should be an invitation rather than an ultimatum, and why sometimes the most important thing your partner needs from you isn’t perfection — it’s your willingness to lean in. In this episode, I sit down with Bryan Reeves to talk about what changes in the second half of life and why the rules that got us here may not be the same ones that carry us forward. We also get into men’s loneliness, why so many men wait until life or a relationship falls apart before asking for support, and how the need to be the hero can keep us isolated. We also talk about becoming fathers later in life, how pregnancy can expose old wounds and patterns in a relationship, and why presence may matter more than getting everything right. In this episode, we talk about: Why the second half of life requires a different kind of ambition When achievement and success stop feeling like enough Meaning, impact, and the temptation to become cynical Why so many men feel lonely even when they’re surrounded by people The “hero” mindset and hyper-independence Why men often wait for a crisis before asking for help What to do when you want to work on your relationship and your partner doesn’t Relationship as invitation instead of obligation Resentment and the importance of speaking up before it’s too late How pregnancy can expose deeper wounds in a relationship Becoming a father later in life Why being present matters more than being perfect Thanks for listening. If something in this conversation makes you think of someone, send it their way. Connect with Bryan Reeves: Website: https://bryanreeves.com/ Book — Choose Her Every Day (Or Leave Her): https://bryanreeves.com/book Love With Integrity Online Community: https://www.skool.com/lovewithintegrity If you’re tired of knowing what you need to change but still repeating the same patterns, 31 Days to Get Out of Your Own Way is for you. For 31 days, we’ll work on closing the gap between insight and action through structure, accountability, and ownership. Less analyzing yourself. More making different choices and actually changing your life. Learn more and join here:https://nas.com/therapist-membership-qa-space/challenges/31-days-to-get-out-of-your-own-way 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest.https://www.harpercollins.com/products/love-hard-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=44339801227298 📚 My book publishing company, Soulprint:https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📖 Read my book in progress, Sht Your Therapist Would Never Tell You, on Substack:*https://substack.com/@theangrytherapist Ready for deeper work? Check out my Secure Self course:https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/ 📘 Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose.:https://www.harpercollins.com/products/break-up-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=42305553956898 📱 Follow me on Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/theangrytherapist/ 🌐 Find out more:https://www.theangrytherapist.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What if the life you spent years trying to build isn’t the life you want anymore? For most of my life, I was trying to arrive somewhere - make more money, build the audience, get another book deal, buy the house, become somebody. There was always another number to hit, another door to get through, another version of myself I thought would finally let me exhale. But lately, something has shifted. In this episode, I talk about giving yourself permission to disappoint the person you used to be. Not because that version of you was wrong, but because you’re allowed to change. You’re allowed to outgrow the goals, identities, and plans that once made perfect sense. I get into the difference between constantly becoming someone and actually experiencing your life, why ambition can be useful without being allowed to drive, and how easy it is to postpone happiness by attaching it to the next achievement, relationship, body, house, promotion, or milestone. Maybe the question isn’t, “Where is all of this going?” Maybe it’s, “Where can I go while I’m still here?” I also answer an Ask Angry question about knowing when it may be time to leave a marriage - and why waiting for absolute certainty can keep us stuck much longer than we realize. In this episode, I talk about: Giving yourself permission to disappoint the person you used to be Letting old goals and identities evolve without rejecting your past Why constantly trying to “arrive” can make you miss your actual life Ambition without letting ambition run your life Following curiosity without needing everything to be productive Why happiness becomes a moving target Recognizing joy while it’s actually happening Asking whether the plan you’re following still belongs to you Why certainty may never come when deciding whether to leave a relationship The questions that can reveal whether there’s still something worth repairing Thanks for listening. If something in this episode hits you, pass it along to someone who might need it. If you’re tired of knowing what you need to change but still repeating the same patterns, 31 Days to Get Out of Your Own Way is for you. For 31 days, we’ll work on closing the gap between insight and action through structure, accountability, and ownership. Less analyzing yourself. More making different choices and actually changing your life. Learn more and join here:https://nas.com/therapist-membership-qa-space/challenges/31-days-to-get-out-of-your-own-way 🎙️ CONNECT WITH ME 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On PurposeToss the blueprints. Build something honest.https://www.harpercollins.com/products/love-hard-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=44339801227298 📚 My book publishing company, Soulprinthttps://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress, Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You, on Substackhttps://substack.com/@theangrytherapist 🧠 Ready for deeper work? Check out the Secure Self coursehttps://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/ 📘 Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose.https://www.harpercollins.com/products/break-up-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=42305553956898 📱 Follow me on Instagramhttps://www.instagram.com/theangrytherapist/?hl=en 🌐 Find out morehttps://www.theangrytherapist.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How do you know whether a relationship can last and when it might be time to leave? In this Therapy Thursdays episode, we take on your questions about conflict, attraction, exes, love languages and the hurt we carry into new relationships. There’s one question underneath many of them: are you working through what’s happening, or waiting for something to change? If you’re tired of knowing what you need to change but still repeating the same patterns, 31 Days to Get Out of Your Own Way is for you. For 31 days, we’ll work on closing the gap between insight and action through structure, accountability, and ownership. Less analyzing yourself. More making different choices and actually changing your life. Learn more and join here: https://nas.com/therapist-membership-qa-space/challenges/31-days-to-get-out-of-your-own-way Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://www.harpercollins.com/products/love-hard-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=44339801227298 My book publishing company, Soulprint: https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress, Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You, on Substack: https://substack.com/@theangrytherapist If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available here: https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/ 📘 My book, Break Up On Purpose: https://www.harpercollins.com/products/break-up-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=42305553956898 📸 Instagram: https://instagram.com/theangrytherapist 🌐 Find out more: https://www.theangrytherapist.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What matters more than love? My answer is capacity. I think we’ve wildly overestimated love’s ability to carry a relationship. You can love someone deeply and still lie to them, betray them, disappear when things get uncomfortable, refuse to look at yourself, or be unable to create a safe space for them. Love is a feeling. A relationship requires skills. In this episode, I answer questions about what actually makes relationships work, how relationships change over time, and what it means to leave someone you still love. I also talk about social media, comparison, and how constantly looking at everyone else’s life can make us question our own. I talk about: ● Why love alone isn’t enough to sustain a relationship ● Capacity, communication, accountability, and repair ● Why long-term relationships require us to grow and become someone we’ve never been before ● What happens when couples resist change and begin to drift apart ● How you can love someone and still know you don’t want to spend the rest of your life with them ● Why staying in a relationship out of fear can sometimes create more pain ● The difference between inspiration and inadequacy on social media ● How comparison can make you overlook the life you’re actually living Thanks for listening. If any of these words help you or someone you know, pass them along. If you’re tired of knowing what you need to change but still repeating the same patterns, 31 Days to Get Out of Your Own Way is for you. For 31 days, we’ll work on closing the gap between insight and action through structure, accountability, and ownership. Less analyzing yourself. More making different choices and actually changing your life. Learn more and join here: https://nas.com/therapist-membership-qa-space/challenges/31-days-to-get-out-of-your-own-way 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. HERE My book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on my SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What happens when you decide an idea is worth pursuing, even when you don't know where it's going to take you? Kelsey Crane joins me to talk about The Vanishing, her debut novel and the first book in The Exiles trilogy. We get into her journey from storytelling and gardening to writing a novel, why she chose to self-publish, what it feels like to reinvent yourself in your 40s, and the fear that comes with putting your work into the world. We also talk about nature, creativity, climate change, the power of storytelling, and the idea that we're not defined by one story or one moment in our lives. Kelsey shares why she believes creating something for future generations can be a powerful source of motivation. In this episode: • Reinventing yourself in your 40s• Writing your first novel• The reality of self-publishing• Fear and pushing through uncertainty• Nature as a source of creativity• Climate fiction and telling teenagers the truth• Why it's okay to be a beginner• Creating a legacy for future generations Follow Kelsey and check out The Vanishing. Guest links: ✨ The Vanishing novel: https://tr.ee/nhKDU8✨ Shopify: http://bit.ly/4hmSopJ✨ Goodreads: http://bit.ly/4fRbbs9✨ Website: https://www.theexilesseries.com✨ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/artforartssake 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest.HERE My book publishing company, Soulprint:HERE 📘 Read my book in progress, Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You, on Substack:HERE If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available:HERE 📘 Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose:HERE 📸 Follow me on Instagram:HERE Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Some of the hardest truths about relationships are the ones we spend the most time avoiding. I’m talking about the conversations that challenge the way we think about marriage, love, resentment, breakups, and even our own intuition. I start with a controversial idea: I think marriages need to die. Not because divorce is the goal, but because long-term relationships can’t survive if the old version of the marriage is expected to stay the same forever. Growth asks us to let old dynamics end so a new relationship can be born. I also answer some of your relationship questions about resentment, breakups, choosing the wrong partners, trusting your gut, and what happens when love activates old attachment wounds. I talk about: Why marriages need death and rebirth to keep growing How life transitions reshape relationships Why feelings and capacity are two different things The difference between loving someone and choosing someone What resentment is communicating before it destroys a relationship How overfunctioning creates hidden resentment Why breakup anger often belongs to an older wound How to move through anger without letting it make decisions Why intuition whispers and anxiety argues How childhood experiences shape what my gut tells me If you enjoyed this episode, subscribe for more conversations about relationships, healing, attachment, and personal growth. If this episode spoke to you, leave a comment and share it with someone who needs this reminder. 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest.https://www.harpercollins.com/products/love-hard-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=44339801227298 My book publishing company: Soulprinthttps://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress, Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You, on Substack:https://substack.com/@theangrytherapist If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available here:https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/ Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose:https://www.harpercollins.com/products/break-up-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=42305553956898 Follow me on Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/theangrytherapist/?hl=en Find out more:https://www.theangrytherapist.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, I reflect on what I’d tell myself 10 years ago about losing everything, rebuilding, and learning that security was never really about what I owned. I also share a story about a local surfer in Costa Rica who offered to teach me after watching me struggle in the water every day. What stayed with me wasn’t the surfing—it was the feeling of being seen, believed in, and chosen at 52. Sometimes the thing we need most isn’t more confidence. It’s someone saying, “I see what you’re trying to become. If this episode resonated with you, be sure to follow the podcast, leave a rating, and share it with someone who might need to hear it. Connect with me: 📘My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://www.harpercollins.com/products/love-hard-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=44339801227298 My book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on my SubStack https://substack.com/@theangrytherapist If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available here. https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/  📘 My book, Break Up On Purpose: https://www.harpercollins.com/products/break-up-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=42305553956898 📸 Instagram: https://instagram.com/theangrytherapist 🌐 Find out more: https://www.theangrytherapist.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Are you staying because you want to or because you’re afraid to leave? In this Therapy Thursdays, I answer your questions about fading attraction, slow-burn love, situationships, and healing after heartbreak. We also talk about what it takes to start liking yourself again. And before you decide there’s no spark, there’s one question worth asking yourself… 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. HERE My book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on my SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Shefali who is an NYT bestselling author of The Conscious Parent and The Awakened Family. She is also a clinical psychologist, an international speaker and a wisdom teacher, integrating Eastern philosophy with Western psychology. We talk about what it actually means to raise conscious boys and girls in a world that is changing faster than ever. We talk about the different things boys and girls are missing today, from physicality, movement, mentorship and healthy masculinity for boys to voice, self-trust and protection from the pressures of social media for girls. We also get into how much of parenting is really about our own wounds, fears and unresolved experiences. Dr. Shefali also shares her own struggle with staying present, letting go and trusting her daughter instead of constantly trying to prevent discomfort or rescue her. We talk about the messy process of parenting, learning to hold space for our children, and eventually becoming less central in their lives. We talk about: What boys and girls need from parents today. Why boys need movement, adventure, mentorship and healthy initiation. The importance of giving boys a pathway toward conscious masculinity. Why young men can become vulnerable when they don't have healthy male mentors. How social media and unrealistic standards are affecting girls. The difference between empowerment and seeking approval. How pornography and the internet have changed childhood. Why parents need to be more present and vigilant without becoming paranoid. How our own childhood experiences can shape the way we parent. Why parenting can become a mirror into our own unconsciousness. The challenge of letting go, trusting and allowing children to experience discomfort. Why boundaries can become harder to establish when we don't set them early. What it means to parent without trying to mold your child into who you think they should become. The eventual goal of moving from center stage to backstage in your child's life. Why there is no perfect way to parent and why making mistakes is part of the process. Connect with Dr. Shefali: Preorder Raising Conscious Sons and Raising Conscious Daughters:https://www.drshefali.com/raisingconscious-daughters-sons/ Official website:https://www.drshefali.com/ Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/doctorshefali/ Parenting & You podcast:https://www.drshefali.com/podcast/ Book tour:https://raisingconscious.drshefali.com/tour/ 🎙️ Connect with John: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. HERE My book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on my SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I’m answering a few questions about love, desire, affairs, and obsession. I start with a question about losing desire for a husband after having an affair and whether that desire can actually come back. My answer is yes - but I don’t think getting the old desire back should be the goal. Sometimes the relationship we had has died, and the work is to create something new instead. I also talk about why affairs can make desire especially confusing, how an affair can awaken a version of ourselves that we haven't felt in a long time, and why that version of us doesn't necessarily belong to the person we had the affair with. Then I get into what happens when couples try to repair after infidelity but accidentally allow the affair to become the relationship. Finally, I talk about obsession and how to tell the difference between obsession and love. Sometimes the person we can't stop thinking about isn't the love of our life - they're the person who created the most uncertainty in our life. I talk about: Why getting the old desire back shouldn't necessarily be the goal. Why you may need to create a new relationship instead of recreating the old one. Why comparing marital desire to affair desire isn't a fair comparison. What an affair can awaken in us beyond the other person. Why sometimes we're craving the version of ourselves we got to be around someone. How couples can rebuild desire together after infidelity. Why making the entire relationship about the affair can prevent real repair. When transparency becomes surveillance instead of rebuilding trust. Why love should expand your world while obsession tends to shrink it. How uncertainty and intermittent reinforcement can make someone feel impossible to let go of. Why we can become obsessed with a version of someone we've created from incomplete information. How to separate what actually happened from what we imagined could happen. Why letting go can mean surrendering the ending we hoped someone would give us. Link to the challenge: ⁠https://nas.com/therapist-membership-qa-space/challenges/300-hundred-questions-in-30-days⁠ If this episode resonated with you, be sure to follow the podcast, leave a rating, and share it with someone who might need to hear it. 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. ⁠HERE⁠ My book publishing company: Soulprint ⁠https://www.soulprintmedia.co⁠ 📘 Read my book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on my SubStack⁠ ⁠HERE⁠⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available ⁠HERE⁠ Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more ⁠HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I think resentment is one of the biggest things that can crack a relationship. We get hurt, minimize it, swallow it, and keep moving until all those little things start piling up. Eventually, the resentment becomes so big that we don't see the person or the relationship the same way anymore.  In this episode, I talk about why we need to learn how to express ourselves before resentment turns into a giant pile, how to know what is actually worth bringing to the table, and why resolving resentment doesn't always mean getting an apology from the person who hurt us.  I also talk about how to bring up resentment without blaming or attacking someone, taking ownership for my own part, and figuring out whether a relationship is still worth investing in. I break down the difference between doing life with someone, at someone, or around someone - and why honest relationships require us to be willing to talk about the hard shit.  I talk about: Why resentment can create hairline cracks in a relationship. How swallowing small hurts can eventually turn into a giant pile of resentment. Why I don't believe we can always depend on someone else to give us closure. How to decide what is actually worth expressing. Why I sometimes overexpress and need to work things out on my own first. Why bringing up resentment should come from a place of response rather than reaction. How taking ownership for my own part can change the conversation. What someone's response to my hurt can tell me about their capacity for the relationship. Why some relationships may have simply been outgrown. How children, finances, and other responsibilities can make resentment harder to address. Why I think we have a responsibility to express valid hurt before the pile gets too big. The difference between doing life with someone, at someone, and around someone. How to think about resentment differently in romantic relationships, friendships, and family. Why some resentment may need to be processed without ever being expressed directly. Why working through resentment is a muscle that requires reps. If this episode resonated with you, be sure to follow the podcast, leave a rating, and share it with someone who might need to hear it. 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. HERE My book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on my SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I’ve been thinking a lot about my relationship with God. I believe in God. I believe in something greater. But I’ve realized that believing in God and actually having a relationship with God are two different things for me. In this episode, I get honest about growing up without religion, my complicated history with Christianity, the moments in my life that have felt undeniably spiritual, and why I think I’ve sometimes avoided a deeper relationship with God. I talk about light and dark, pleasure and addiction, surrender, serendipity, and the idea that our stories may be the place where we see something greater working through us. I also talk about my house burning down, starting over in Costa Rica, the unexpected things that have happened since, and how those experiences have changed the way I see my life and my relationship with God. I share why I’ve started looking at my story differently and why I think making sense of the painful parts of our lives can help us move from a dark place toward the light. I talk about: ● Why I believe in God but still struggle with my relationship with God. ● Growing up without religion and my complicated relationship with Christianity. ● Why I sometimes felt like I was performing rather than genuinely worshipping. ● The moments in my life that have felt like undeniable “God moments.” ● Why I see light and dark as two different paths we can move toward. ● How pleasure, addiction, and unhealthy choices can pull us toward darkness. ● Why I think serendipity can be a form of light. ● How I’ve started seeing the events in my life as part of a larger story. ● What my house burning down taught me about surrender and starting over. ● Why I believe our story may be the most valuable thing we ever own. ● How looking back at trauma and painful experiences can help us understand our story. ● Why I’m beginning to wonder if this next chapter of my life is about developing a better relationship with God. 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. HEREMy book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on my SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Why do we remain stuck in the same patterns, compare ourselves to our partner’s past, or wait for an ex to give us closure? In Episode 26 of Therapy Thursdays, John answers your most personal questions about identity, intimacy, insecurity, attachment and relationships. He explains why meaningful change requires us to let go of an old version of ourselves - and why the familiar can feel safe even when it is making us unhappy. He also explores what true intimacy looks like after the performance falls away, how to respond when a partner asks for space, and what couples are really trying to communicate beneath everyday arguments. From protest behaviour and defensiveness to breakups, reconciliation and the need for an apology, this episode is about recognising what is happening underneath the surface. 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. HERE My book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on my SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I’m breaking down the biggest ways I think we sabotage our own healing, relationships, and lives. This conversation came from a post that resonated with millions of people and grew into a series because these patterns are so common - and so easy to mistake for growth. I talk about why insight isn’t the same as change, why breakups aren’t something we simply “get over,” why divorce doesn’t automatically mean failure, and why chasing happiness can keep us disconnected from a life that actually feels meaningful. I talk about: Why knowing my attachment style doesn’t automatically change my behavior. How self-awareness can become another place to hide. Why healing eventually becomes about execution, not explanation. Why I don’t believe we truly get over people we deeply loved. How grief includes losing the future I imagined with someone. Why divorce doesn’t erase a real or meaningful marriage. How staying because of fear is different from staying because of love. Why happiness was never meant to be my permanent destination. What I’ve started choosing instead of making happiness my North Star. If this episode resonated with you, be sure to follow the podcast, leave a rating, and share it with someone who might need to hear it. 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. HERE My book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on my SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What happens when I know better but still find myself repeating the same relationship patterns? I answer 10 questions about love, attachment, obsession, loneliness, breakups, abuse, reconciliation, and the difficult choices we make when relationships activate something deeper inside us. I talk about why we can confuse familiarity with safety, why we sometimes become addicted to what another person does to our nervous system, and how to tell the difference between attachment anxiety and intuition. I also explore why some relationships are worth experiencing even if they aren't meant to last, and why being lonely inside a relationship can make attention from an ex feel so powerful. In this episode: • Why repetition compulsion can make us recreate emotional dynamics that hurt us • How familiar can become confused with safe • Why obsession with another person can actually be a form of emotional regulation • How to distinguish attachment anxiety from intuition • How to tell whether you're fighting for a relationship or fighting against grieving it • Why not every meaningful relationship has to become a lifelong one • Why I don't believe there is necessarily one person who is the one • What loneliness inside a relationship can reveal about what you're actually missing • Why leaving an abusive relationship can be much more complicated than simply knowing you should leave • When friendship with an ex is actually just another way of holding on • Why long-term relationships can become disconnected and what it can look like to find each other again 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. HERE My book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on my SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What is the difference between loving someone and becoming obsessed with them? In this episode, I explore how love can slowly turn into fixation, fantasy, and emotional dependency, and why so many of us confuse chemistry with compatibility. Recording from a hotel room, I reflect on my own experiences with emotional intensity, attachment patterns, love addiction, fantasy, and obsession, as well as the challenge of building a life that doesn’t revolve around one person. In this episode, I talk about: Why obsession is often about identity, not the other person The difference between chemistry and compatibility How fantasy creates emotional intensity Why intermittent reinforcement is so addictive The connection between obsession, attachment wounds, and love addiction How emotional intensity and expanding your life can change your perspective on relationships Why I believe a healthy relationship requires a life that is bigger than the relationship itself What it means to choose yourself without becoming emotionally isolated 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. HERE My book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on my SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The house I grew up in is probably still living inside me. And the house you grew up in may still be living inside you, too. I’m recording from a diner in Mexico City and exploring one of the most important questions we can ask ourselves: What was the emotional climate of the home I grew up in? This conversation goes far beyond nostalgia or childhood memories. I explore how the emotional atmosphere we grew up in - whether it was chaotic, unpredictable, emotionally distant, performance-driven, or conflict-avoidant - can continue shaping our relationships, attachment patterns, self-worth, and nervous system responses decades later. Drawing from my own experiences and years of therapeutic work, I break down four types of emotionally immature parents and how growing up around these dynamics can wire us to become caretakers, perfectionists, conflict avoiders, or people who feel guilty for having needs at all. This isn’t about blaming our parents. It’s about understanding how those early experiences taught us to relate to ourselves. Because real adulthood begins when we learn how to become the safest place we’ve ever lived. In this episode: • Why the emotional climate of your childhood matters more than the physical house • The signs of an emotionally ruled parent • How hypervigilance can get mistaken for empathy • Why driven parents can unintentionally tie love to achievement • What passive parents can teach us about conflict and boundaries • How rejecting parents can create adults who apologize for existing • Why we often choose familiarity in relationships, not randomness • The connection between childhood emotional neglect and adult anxious attachment • What reparenting actually looks like in everyday life • The question I want you to ask yourself about the emotional climate you may still be carrying today 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. HERE My book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on my SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this Therapy Thursdays episode, I’m answering the relationship and personal-growth questions we often think about but don’t always know how to ask. What does an emotionally safe relationship actually feel like? How do you know if you’re settling - or simply navigating the normal challenges of being with someone? When does a relationship push you toward growth, and when does it start pulling you away from yourself? I also get into how living in survival mode can shape the way we move through adulthood, why happiness can’t always be postponed until life finally looks the way we want it to, and what it means to build a life that feels more expansive than constricting. Healthy doesn’t mean easy. But the challenges in your life and relationships should ultimately help you become someone you recognize—and someone you actually like. 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. HERE My book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on my SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When is enough enough? What if the life you're chasing is based on someone else's definition of success? In this conversation, John Kim and Buddy Wakefield explore the difference between going wide and going deep, and why fulfillment may have less to do with fame, money, and recognition than we think. From poetry, Portugal, and Los Angeles to money, hope, and the pressure to constantly achieve more, this episode is a raw and honest reflection on potential, ambition, and what actually makes a life feel meaningful. In this episode, John and Buddy talk about: Whether potential really has to "go wide" How growing up in Los Angeles shaped John's definition of success Why Buddy's experience in Portugal changed the way he thinks about enough The difference between external recognition and meaningful impact What money can and cannot provide How hustle culture can keep you disconnected from the present moment Why Buddy is learning to welcome the word hope back into his life The small, ordinary moments that bring real happiness If this episode resonated with you, follow the podcast, leave a rating, and share it with someone who has been measuring their worth by how wide they've gone instead of how deeply they've lived. Connect with Buddy: https://www.buddywakefield.com/ https://www.instagram.com/buddywakefield 🎙️ Connect with John: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. HERE My book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on my SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What if the biggest factor affecting your mental health isn’t what happens to you, but which container you’re paying attention to? In this personal check-in from Mexico City, I reflect on the difference between the macro container - the collective world of politics, climate change, technology, uncertainty, and fear - and the micro container - your relationships, work, family, community, and daily life. After losing my home in the Altadena fires and spending the last year rebuilding my life in a completely different way, I’ve been thinking a lot about how perspective, attention, and emotional frequency can shape the way we experience our circumstances. In this episode, I talk about: ● The difference between the macro world and the micro world ● How social media can keep us trapped in fear and hopelessness ● Why losing my home changed my perspective on time and possibility ● What travel has taught me about identity and freedom ● How surfing and beach life have helped me regulate my nervous system ● Why survival mode became my default for most of my life ● The question I’m asking myself: which container is shaping my frequency? If this episode resonated with you, follow the podcast, leave a rating, and share it with someone who needs the reminder that while we can’t control the entire world, we can still shape the world immediately around us. 🎙️ Connect with me: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. HERE My book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read my book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on my SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order my book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John dives into ten different signs you're growing as a person, and how hard it is so grow, heal, and change. This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/angry and start building a better relationship with yourself. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.    Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com  Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home  Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John gets real about the responsibilities and struggles that comes with being a parent. This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/angry and start building a better relationship with yourself. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.    Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com  Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home  Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about how your sense of self is always changing, what connecting to yourself looks like, and how "finding yourself" is a never-ending journey.  Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.    Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com  Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home  Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John and Vanessa talk about attachment styles and how they want to be celebrated in their relationships. They also answer a few listeners' questions about love, dating, and relationships. John and Vanessa are launching their second ever couples retreat on Sept 8-10th!   Escape to Idyllwild, California, for an unforgettable weekend retreat tailored exclusively for couples. Nestled amidst nature's tranquil embrace, this retreat promises an enriching experience designed to strengthen your bond and foster deep connection.  You can sign up and find out more information here: https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/c/inmiy-retreat-mainfeed/ Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.    Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com  Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home  Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John and Vanessa answer listeners' questions and talk about why people run in their relationships. John and Vanessa are launching their second ever couples retreat on Sept 8-10th!   Escape to Idyllwild, California, for an unforgettable weekend retreat tailored exclusively for couples. Nestled amidst nature's tranquil embrace, this retreat promises an enriching experience designed to strengthen your bond and foster deep connection.  You can sign up and find out more information here: https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/c/inmiy-retreat-mainfeed/ Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.    Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com  Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home  Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John and Vanessa discuss the importance of having and expressing your needs in a relationship as they drive on the freeway. They discuss their needs, how they communicate them, how they figure out what their needs are, and end the episode with a homework assignment for their listeners. John and Vanessa are launching their second ever couples retreat on Sept 8-10th!   Escape to Idyllwild, California, for an unforgettable weekend retreat tailored exclusively for couples. Nestled amidst nature's tranquil embrace, this retreat promises an enriching experience designed to strengthen your bond and foster deep connection.  You can sign up and find out more information here: https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/c/inmiy-retreat-mainfeed/ Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.    Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com  Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home  Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John does a deep dive on why a lot of his clients (and people in general) believe they're unlovable whether that's from experiences from childhood, getting cheated on, being in multiple unhealthy relationships, and more.  Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.    Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com  Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home  Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about asking yourself important life questions to help you attach meaning to things that are happening to you, and learn lessons to help you grow. He also talks about how creating meaning to your life will help you create purpose, and change your mindset from unhealthy to healthy. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.    Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com  Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home  Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Therapists should see a therapist as well. John gets back into his own therapy, something he hasn’t done in a long time.  In this session he processes his greatest fear, people thinking he’s a fraud.   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Stop losing yourself to love. What if codependency isn't just about your relationships with other people, but your relationship with yourself? In this episode, John and Vanessa explore why recovering from codependency is really about building a stronger sense of identity. They explain how people pleasing, lacking boundaries, and fearing rejection can keep us disconnected from who we really are, and why choosing authenticity over self-abandonment is essential for healthier relationships. In this episode: • Why codependency recovery is really identity work • How people pleasing can become a way to avoid yourself • The connection between resentment, boundaries, and self-abandonment • Why some relationships change or end when you begin healing • The difference between healthy love and the version of love many of us were taught • How corrective experiences help you build a stronger relationship with yourself If you enjoyed this episode, follow the podcast, leave a rating, and share it with someone who might need to hear it. 🔗 Resources & Links 👉 Apply to Inner Compass Academy: https://www.vanessabennett.com/inner-compass-academy 👉 Follow Vanessa on Instagram @vanessasbennett 👉 Author of “The Motherhood Myth” Buy the Book Here: https://shorturl.at/Thsny 🎙️ More about John: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. HERE John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John’s book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John talks to Sarah Baldwin about the importance of regulating the nervous system and the nuances of regulation. They explore how functional fitness and various daily activities can help regulate the nervous system. Sarah shares her personal journey of healing from complex trauma and how it led her to become a trauma-informed therapist. She also discusses the effects of trauma on the nervous system and emphasizes the importance of somatic work for trauma resolution, and gives practical tips for regulating the nervous system and highlights the role of safety and intimacy in sexual experiences.  Sarah's IG handle: @sarahbcoaching Website: https://www.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/worktogetherYou Make Sense Waitlist: https://programs.sarahbaldwincoaching.com/you-make-sense-waitlist Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.    Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com  Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home  Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this real couples session, John explores the challenges faced by a couple in their marriage and their journey towards personal growth and rebuilding their relationship. The couple discusses their struggles with work-life balance, the impact of cultural and religious expectations, and the need for self-discovery and self-love. They share their experiences of moving back and forth between countries, the importance of taking time apart, and the process of reevaluating priorities. John highlights the significance of communication, supporting each other's growth, and finding individual happiness in order to create a healthier and more fulfilling relationship. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.    Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com  Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home  Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John and Vanessa do a deep dive on codependency. They define it, give examples on what it looks like in relationships, talk about how they struggle with codependency in their own and previous relationships, and end with a homework assignment for their listeners.  Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.    Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com  Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home  Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John reads an old letter he wrote to his future self. The letter contains reminders about what his past has taught him, how important practicing gratitude is, the difference between chasing your goals and pursing your goals, how to dream big, and more.  Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.    Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com  Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home  Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John sits down with the host of "Do The Work" podcast, Sabrina Zohar, and talk about attachment styles, healing from expired relationships, unhealthy childhoods, how different dating men is in New York and Los Angeles, catalyst life moments, and more. You can find out more about Sabrina and her work here: https://stan.store/sabrinazohar Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.    Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com  Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home  Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about alignment, signs you're not aligned with yourself and you life, and how to realign yourself by asking yourself and going deeper with these personal questions: are you expanding, or constricting yourself?  Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.    Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com  Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home  Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John sits down with break up expert, Amy Chan, to talk everything about break ups. Why they happen, how to heal, what lessons to learn from them, how to move on, and more. Amy Chan is the Founder of Renew Breakup Bootcamp, a retreat that takes a scientific and spiritual approach to heal the heart. The Observer calls her  "A relationship expert whose work is like that of a scientific Carrie Bradshaw". She's the author of the book, Breakup Bootcamp - The Science of Rewiring Your Heart, which was featured in the New York Times and just launched The Breakup Bootcamp podcast. You can find Amy's website here: www.renewbreakupbootcamp.com Her Instagram: www.instagram.com/missamychan Her book:  https://amzn.to/3gJOnJi  and her Break Up Bootcamp Podcast here: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/breakup-bootcamp/id1706381480  Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.    Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com  Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home  Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about what to do when everything in your life feels like it's falling apart. He also opens up about his own struggles and crisis he's currently going through to show that not everyone has it all together, and things falling apart is a part of the human experience.  Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.    Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com  Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home  Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John shares his long stretch of singlehood on purpose story, and talks about his revelations about what he's learned being single for a long period of time. This episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/angry and start building a better relationship with yourself. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best-selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.    Meet him at -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com  Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home  Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John explains and gives examples on how to create new love experiences. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John gives you steps on how to build yourself a new life container. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John plays a recording he made on his phone about reasons why one should let someone go. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. In this episode, John talks relationship and marriage advice. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke. Want to become a life coach? Check it out here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. In this episode, John talks about understanding your love languages Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke. Want to become a life coach? Check it out here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about the TV show "Love is Blind," dating, relationships, love whether he believes love is blind or not. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. ________________ FREE AUDIBLE TRIAL: Get your 30 days free trial and one free audiobook and 2 Audible Originals with Audible --> use this link to claim your free book! http://audible.com/angry BLUECHEW Promo Code: BlueChew is a service dedicated to bringing prescription treatments for men who don't like pills, do not want to go to the doctor’s office, and want to have more confidence in bed. ---> https://bluechew.com Use Promo Code ANGRY and pay only $5 dollars shipping to try this product for free. ________________ Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke, with production support and design from Stephanie Zoccatelli. Want a free relationship toolkit to improve your relationships and yourself? Sign up here theangrytherapist.com/podcast. Want to change your own life, give back to others and change the way others experience the world? Let's talk. Become a life coach. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Order John's book, "I Used to Be a Miserable F*ck" out now!  John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. Get 50$ off your first Greenchef order! --> http://greenchef.us/angrytherapist -- THE #1 MEAL KIT FOR EATING WELL -- Now offering a variety of easy-to-follow meal plans for every lifestyle, like keto, paleo, vegan, and more. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke, with support from Stephanie Zoccatelli. Want a free relationship toolkit to improve your relationships and yourself? Sign up here theangrytherapist.com/podcast. Want to change your own life, give back to others and change the way others experience the world? Let's talk. Become a life coach. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

PRE-ORDER John Kim's new book here! John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke, with support from Stephanie Zoccatelli. Want a free relationship toolkit to improve your relationships and yourself? Sign up here theangrytherapist.com/podcast. Want to become a life coach? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

PRE-ORDER John Kim's new book here! John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke, with support from Stephanie Zoccatelli. Want a free relationship toolkit to improve your relationships and yourself? Sign up here theangrytherapist.com/podcast. Want to become a life coach? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

PRE-ORDER John Kim's new book here! John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke, with support from Stephanie Zoccatelli. Want a free relationship toolkit to improve your relationships and yourself? Sign up here theangrytherapist.com/podcast. Want to become a life coach? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

PRE-ORDER John Kim's new book here!John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke, with support from Stephanie Zoccatelli. Want a free relationship toolkit to improve your relationships and yourself? Sign up here theangrytherapist.com/podcast. Want to become a life coach? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke, with support from Stephanie Zoccatelli. Want a free relationship toolkit to improve your relationships and yourself? Sign up here theangrytherapist.com/podcast. Want to become a life coach? Check it out here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke, with support by Stephanie Zoccatelli. Want a free relationship toolkit to improve your relationships and yourself? Sign up here theangrytherapist.com/podcast. Want to become a life coach? Check it out here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke.  Want a free relationship toolkit to improve your relationships and yourself? Sign up here theangrytherapist.com/podcast. Want to become a life coach? Check it out here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke.  Want a free relationship toolkit to improve your relationships and yourself? Sign up here theangrytherapist.com/podcast. Want to become a life coach? Check it out here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke.  Want a free relationship toolkit to improve your relationships and yourself? Sign up here theangrytherapist.com/podcast. Want to become a life coach? Check it out here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke.  Want a free relationship toolkit to improve your relationships and yourself? Sign up here theangrytherapist.com/podcast. Want to become a life coach? Check it out here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke.  Want a free relationship toolkit to improve your relationships and yourself? Sign up here theangrytherapist.com/podcast Want to become a life coach? Check it out here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke.  Want a free relationship toolkit to improve your relationships and yourself? Sign up here theangrytherapist.com/podcast Want to become a life coach? Check it out here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke.  Want a free relationship toolkit to improve your relationships and yourself? Sign up here theangrytherapist.com/podcast Want to become a life coach? Check it out here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. In this episode, John explains how to get what you want by letting go of it. Don't worry, he'll explain. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke.  Want to become a life coach? Check it out here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. In this episode, John goes deep on what the work is and how to do the work. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke. Want to become a life coach? Check it out here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

John Kim (The Angry Therapist) is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. Ten minutes, no filler. In this episode, John talks about his changing definition of beauty. Music in this episode is by Keshco, used under a creative commons license. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke. Want to become a life coach? Check it out here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What happens when life forces you to start over? In this personal check-in, John Kim reflects on the unexpected lessons that came from rebuilding his life after losing his home. From learning to surf at 53 to finding clarity through travel and stepping out of survival mode, this episode explores what it means to reconnect with yourself and embrace a different way of living. In this episode: • Why learning to surf became more than just a new hobby • How reconnecting with old parts of yourself can lead to real growth • The unexpected ways Costa Rica has reshaped his perspective on life • What travel has taught him about identity, home, and possibility • The difference between living in survival mode and living with intention • Why changing your environment can change the way you see yourself If this episode resonated with you, be sure to follow the podcast, leave a rating, and share it with someone who might need to hear it. 🎙️ More about John: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. HERE John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE Order John’s book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John encourages and talks about how to take your pleasure seriously. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about how being in relationships are similar to being in recovery. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John explains how to build your relationship with you. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John shares some life tips and explores how to stop recreating what was. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about encourages his listeners to pause and think about what they're looking forward to in life. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this special hour long conversation, John Kim (The Angry Therapist) speaks with Lance Allred (http://lanceallred41.com/) the first deaf NBA player in history, about his history growing up around polygamy and how his story has transformed his life and the lives of others. John Kim is doing things differently. Therapy in a shotglass. One hour, no filler. ________________ Music in this episode is by Keshco. The Angry Therapist Podcast is Produced and Audio Engineered by Amanda Meyncke, with production support and design from Stephanie Zoccatelli. Want a free relationship toolkit to improve your relationships and yourself? Sign up here theangrytherapist.com/podcast. Want to change your own life, give back to others and change the way others experience the world? Let's talk. Become a life coach.     Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John shares his twenty seven life lessons. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.   Meet him at -> www.theangrytherapist.com Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about how to create and hold a safe space and practice active listening in your relationships. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.   Meet him at -> www.theangrytherapist.com Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about his couples' session with Vanessa, and shares The 12 Principles Of Secure Functioning Relationships their therapist gave them. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.   Meet him at -> www.theangrytherapist.com Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode of The Trauma Tapes, a letter writer asks MC and Elizabeth how to make sense of a life that contains both success and trauma. They talk about her story, run through the disorganized attachment style and then hone in on Adverse Childhood Experience (ACEs) and their opposite – Positive Childhood Experiences (PCEs). Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode of The Trauma Tapes, MC and Elizabeth talk to a letter writer about how to peel back the shame she feels when she goes back to an abusive ex, so she can reconnect with herself and move on. They explain how this is in part a neurobiological issue, and what she can do about it in order to begin a new life. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John convinces Vanessa to get on his Harley and do a free session in the park, helping a couple who emailed John from the internet (fell from the sky). They want to work on their relationship before they have their baby.  Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.   Meet him at -> www.theangrytherapist.com Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about three things you can't get back in life. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.   Meet him at -> www.theangrytherapist.com Join his private communities -> https://theangrytherapist.circle.so/home Get his daily texts here -> https://www.theangrytherapist.com/text Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In today's episode of The Trauma Tapes Series, MC and Elizabeth talk to a letter writer about letting go, radically accepting, and moving on. They also talk a bit more about the fight, flight, or freeze response to clarify a previous question. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In the first episode of The Trauma Tapes Series with Dr. MC McDonald and Elizabeth Meadows, a letter writer asks how to deal with triggers in an intimate relationship. Both MC and Elizabeth unpack triggers - what they are, how they work, and how to work around them. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about how no matter how much work we've done on ourselves, we can still snap back to our old ways. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John wakes up early and talks about how productive you can be in the morning. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about getting his first colonoscopy and explains how it gave him a reset on life. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about the importance of having authentic friendships. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode of "It's Not Me, It's You," John and Vanessa talk about our needs in relationships and why they're important. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about what to do if you're not feeling it anymore in your relationship. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode of "It's Not Me, It's You," John and Vanessa talk about the the idea of how to love like it's going to end. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this special episode, John sends a message to all of our current and previous TAT Lab members. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about things he struggles with and the importance of being happy with what you have right now. Roughly ten minutes of self help in a shot glass. If you're looking for a wine glass, you've come to the wrong place. Marriage family therapist and best selling author, John Kim, shares his life and love revelations as well as insights from his sessions. He pulls the curtain back and documents his journey as a therapist but more importantly, as a human being.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In this episode, John talks about the four things he believes you will regret if you don't start doing them now. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices