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The Therapy Crouch

The Therapy Crouch

Tall or Nothing

Welcome to the Therapy Crouch! The smash hit podcast from Abbey Clancy and Peter Crouch. Join us on our weekly episodes where we will be exploring the trials and tribulations experienced by us, and you the listener, as we navigate our way through complex relationships.


Enter into our safe space where nothing is off limits and expect some tears, tantrums and plenty of laughs along the way.


Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

338 - 200 Episodes Of The Therapy Crouch: BP Garage Wine, iCloud Fails & Classic Crouchy Moments
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  • 338 - 200 Episodes Of The Therapy Crouch: BP Garage Wine, iCloud Fails & Classic Crouchy Moments

    We're back in the barn for another episode of The Therapy Crouch!


    Pete and Abbey are back and things quickly derail when Gaz struggles to hide his iCloud images, accidentally flashing Abbey and Pete with old embarrassing MySpace-angle selfies to the entire studio. It’s peak Crouch chaos, proving that even after hundreds of hours on camera, GDPR is still a completely foreign concept in the barn.


    To celebrate a massive 200 episodes of the podcast, we are taking a trip down memory lane, reflecting on the evolution of the show, dishing out awards for our favourite moments, and bringing back a very special edition of Weekly Wines—comparing a lavish £30 Pinot Noir to a £2.99 bottle from the BP garage!


    We also revisit the most chaotic guest appearances from Amanda Holden to Alan Carr, discuss the hilarity of playing 'Bonk Beats' like Family Guy in the bedroom, and dive into a Hall of Fame Agony Abs segment featuring the infamous interpretive crab dance and the legend of Race Day Jack!


    If you want to submit an Agony Ab to the podcast - hit the link below

    https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1rAKDST4HU_8al_aWpOlys3TRJrWvDV-84piVdlOOjU4/edit


    00:00 - Celebrating 200 Episodes

    01:45 - The Evolution Of The Pod

    03:00 - We Actually Love Each Other

    05:10 - Gaz's NSFW Selfies

    06:30 - Pete Leaked More Than His Bank Card

    09:00 - This Weekly Wine

    10:30 - The BP Garage Wine

    11:55 - The Aunty Clit Nickname

    14:15 - Chinless Wonder

    17:10 - Abbey's Dad Loves Pete

    19:30 - Wildest Guest Awards

    20:00 - Amanda Holden's Noisy Neighbours

    23:30 - Bedroom Bonk Beats with The Buckley's

    24:35 - Best Agony Abs Awards

    25:40 - The Pink Innocence Ick

    28:00 - Race Day Jack


    To contact us:

    Email: thetherapycrouch@gmail.com

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thetherapycrouchpodcast/

    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thetherapycrouch

    Website: https://thetherapycrouch.com/


    For more from Peter

    https://twitter.com/petercrouch


    For more from Abbey

    https://www.instagram.com/abbeyclancy


    Our clips channel

    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZntcv96YhN8IvMAKsz4Dbg


    Ep:200

    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Tue, 03 Nov 2026 - 38min
  • 337 - "You Look Like A Swinger!" Abbey Roasts Pete's New Tash & Garage Disasters | AMA

    Welcome to another episode of The Therapy Crouch! This week, Abbey is nursing a brutally symmetrical Portuguese mosquito bite while Pete returns from China to face some harsh truths from their seven-year-old son Jack, who has officially ruled out marriage for good. Plus, the debate turns heated as Pete's fresh moustache gets brutally compared to an 80s p*rn star and a swinger's retreat regular. We also dive into the eternal question every partner asks: why do retired footballers abandon the pitch just to obsess over golf? Pete reveals whether hitting a hole-in-one tops scoring a Premier League screamer, while Abbey explains why an immaculately organised airing cupboard gives her a bigger high than any sport on earth. Things take a chaotic turn when a listener submits a terrifying shower prank mishap that turned a romantic routine into a trip hazard, prompting an official crouch public safety announcement. If you want to submit an Agony Ab to the podcast - hit the link below https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1rAKDST4HU_8al_aWpOlys3TRJrWvDV-84piVdlOOjU4/edit 00:00 - The Shower Shabra Warning 00:28 - Abbey's Portuguese Mosquito Bite 01:40 - Pete’s Trip to China & High-Tech Cars 03:15 - Jack’s Honest Thoughts on Marriage 04:06 - Gaz’s Food Tour in San Sebastián 05:22 - Pete’s Moustache Gets Roasted 07:01 - Airport Lounge Fan Encounters 08:20 - The Agony Ab: Shower Prank Disaster 10:28 - Why Footballers Switch to Golf 12:24 - Premier League Goal vs. Hole-in-One 14:00 - Abbey's Bowling Strike Wonder 15:52 - What Gives Abbey an Adrenaline Rush? 18:12 - Airing Cupboards & Garage Goals 20:00 - Can Pete & Abbey Watch Sports Together? 21:05 - The Great Gymnastics Debate 22:36 - Pete's Garage Organising Promise To contact us: Email: thetherapycrouch@gmail.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thetherapycrouchpodcast/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thetherapycrouch Website: https://thetherapycrouch.com/ For more from Peter https://twitter.com/petercrouch For more from Abbey https://www.instagram.com/abbeyclancy Our clips channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZntcv96YhN8IvMAKsz4Dbg

    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Thu, 29 Oct 2026 - 22min
  • 336 - Pete’s Terrifying New Look, Sexy Halloween Nightmares & Petty Candy Scandals!

    We've taken over a friends studio for another episode of The Therapy Crouch! Pete has unveiled a brand-new moustache just in time for November, and let’s just say Abbey is far from impressed. From brutal roasts about whether it suits him to Abbey discovering a BBC study revealing that pet dogs are actually cleaner than men's facial hair, domestic harmony is truly hanging by a thread. The couple dive headfirst into the madness of Halloween preparations, debating proper etiquette around trick-or-treating, disastrous past outfits, and whether sexy costumes have gone entirely too far. Plus, Pete defends an emergency essentials trip to Decathlon, while Abbey questions why it's treated like a day out. Elsewhere, we hear wild celebrity trick-or-treating tales, discuss the logistics of couples costumes, and unpack an outrageous Agony Abs dilemma involving neighbourhood candy feuds and petty payback. Try Huel with £10 OFF for New Customers today using our code "therapycrouch" at huel.com/therapycrouch If you want to submit an Agony Ab to the podcast - hit the link below https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1rAKDST4HU_8al_aWpOlys3TRJrWvDV-84piVdlOOjU4/edit 00:00 - Diabolical Weather & Portugal Banter 03:57 - The Demi Panochet Mystery 05:37 - Why Decathlon Is An Obsession 09:42 - Pete Debuts The New Moustache 11:08 - Dogs Are Cleaner Than Men's Beards 14:29 - The Hips Don't Lie 17:15 - Trick Or Treating Rules 20:48 - Sexy vs Scary Costumes 24:10 - The AI Costume Challenge 27:27 - Couples Costume Disasters 31:16 - Agony Abs: The Stolen Sweets Scandal 35:38 - Sweet Revenge & Petty Feuds 39:49 - Pete & Abbey In A Horror Maze 44:09 - The Ultimate Halloween Prank 48:47 - Approaching Episode 200 To contact us: Email: thetherapycrouch@gmail.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thetherapycrouchpodcast/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thetherapycrouch Website: https://thetherapycrouch.com/ For more from Peter https://twitter.com/petercrouch For more from Abbey https://www.instagram.com/abbeyclancy Our clips channel https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZntcv96YhN8IvMAKsz4Dbg Ep:199

    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Tue, 27 Oct 2026 - 50min
  • 335 - Pete Crouch Reveals The Worst Locker Room Prank That Went Way Too Far!

    On this Ask Me Anything, Pete and Abbey are back tackling your wild Ask Me Anything dilemmas, from university pranks taken to sickening extremes to Pete getting completely stitched up with Deep Heat in the Stoke City changing rooms. Plus, Abbey exposes Pete's questionable choice of romantic bedroom music and the horrors of getting hammered together on date night.


    In this episode, the debate turns to relationship red flags when a listener asks how to save a best mate whose partner is alienating everyone, leaving Pete and Abbey to discuss whether you should ever tell a friend you hate their other half.


    We also tackle the return from an epic bedroom dry spell, how to rebuild confidence when things get awkward, and Abbey’s horror at Pete’s seduction tactics.


    If you want to submit a question to our next AMA - hit the link below

    https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1B-c3yvC-4Ew3H1nJc5fD-5d3X9JbK7L2mN1oP0qR8s/viewform


    00:00 - Barn Banter & Where Is Gaz?

    01:00 - The University Kahoot Prank

    03:26 - A Step Too Far: Pete & Abbey React

    05:14 - Pete's Stoke Changing Room Bullying

    06:26 - Dilemma: We Dislike Our Friend's Partner

    08:32 - How To Tell A Friend You Hate Their Fella

    10:28 - Recovering From A Major Dry Spell

    12:05 - Rebuilding Confidence & Post-Baby Bodies

    3:17 - Pete & Abbey's Cinema Date Night

    14:22 - Running Playlists & Dad Rock Debates

    16:16 - Pete's "Bonk Beat" Bedroom Anthems

    17:40 - Alexa, Get Crouchy In The Mood


    To contact us:

    Email: thetherapycrouch@gmail.com

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thetherapycrouchpodcast/

    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thetherapycrouch

    Website: https://thetherapycrouch.com/


    For more from Peter

    https://twitter.com/petercrouch


    For more from Abbey

    https://www.instagram.com/abbeyclancy


    Our clips channel

    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZntcv96YhN8IvMAKsz4Dbg

    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Thu, 22 Oct 2026 - 18min
  • 334 - Blind Date Waxing Nightmare, Turkey Pillows & The Brutal Family Roast!

    We're back in the barn for another episode of The Therapy Crouch!


    Pete and Abbey unpack their scenic escape to Norway, surviving endless glasses of "bitch juice," and why Pete's post-golf hosting habits leave Abbey freezing in a house without furniture. Between Abbey attempting to cure a brutal hangover with raw sardines and Pete sleeping with a giant turkey-shaped ostrich pillow on his head, domestic harmony is truly hanging by a thread.


    The team break down the sheer chaos of half-term parenting, navigating four kids with zero overlapping interests, and the extreme parental lies used to keep the peace. Pete reveals why he abandoned Abbey mid-fall during a high-stakes game of 40-40 in the garden, while the pair make another high-stakes charity bet on whether they can survive the holidays completely sober.


    Plus, an incredible lineup of listener dilemmas in Weekly Wines and Agony Abs: from living with a flatmate who commentates every domestic chore like David Attenborough, to a blind date that goes horribly wrong when the woman opposite turns out to be the local waxing specialist. Finally, the gang tackle a truly cursed, wide-eyed horse painting that's destroying one listener’s living room walls.


    If you want to submit an Agony Ab to the podcast - hit the link below https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1rAKDST4HU_8al_aWpOlys3TRJrWvDV-84piVdlOOjU4/edit


    00:00 - Back From Norway & The Ostrich Pillow

    04:40 - Bitch Juice & 20 Bottles of Wine

    09:35 - Pete’s Golf Mates Invade The Rental

    11:05 - The Sardine Hangover Cure & Kebabs

    12:35 - Weekly Wine: The Housemate Narrator

    15:18 - Best Friend Marriages & Watching Paint Dry

    19:05 - Blind Date With The Waxing Clinic Doctor

    22:20 - Half-Term Chaos & Summer Holiday Debates

    23:26 - Bunking Pilates For Dim Sum & China Trips

    29:03 - The Tree Swing & Pete’s 40-40 Betrayal

    32:26 - Classic Lies Parents Tell Their Kids

    35:46 - The Half-Term Dry Charity Bet

    37:31 - Agony Abs: "You Can Taste The Effort"

    42:50 - Rihanna Ringtone Disasters

    44:33 - The Terrifying Horse Painting Dilemma


    To contact us:

    Email: thetherapycrouch@gmail.com

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thetherapycrouchpodcast/

    TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thetherapycrouch

    Website: https://thetherapycrouch.com/


    For more from Peter

    https://twitter.com/petercrouch


    For more from Abbey

    https://www.instagram.com/abbeyclancy


    Our clips channel

    https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZntcv96YhN8IvMAKsz4Dbg


    Ep:197

    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Tue, 20 Oct 2026 - 49min
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