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Not As We Planned

Not As We Planned

Tash Gershfield & Carly Harris
Niños y Familia, Sociedad y Cultura

New episodes every Thursday, with exclusive bonus episodes every Monday on Patreon.

Welcome to Not As We Planned, the honest podcast about relationships, dating, marriage, divorce and motherhood, and all the things no one really talks about.

From becoming a mum and navigating divorce, to rebuilding life as a single mum and dating again in your 30s, we’re sharing the real, messy and unexpected sides of it all.

Life doesn’t always go to plan, and neither do relationships. This is a space for open conversations, shared experiences and saying the things most people avoid.

If you have a question or want to share your story, email us at notasweplannedpodcast@gmail.com


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Get our weekly BONUS episode:

https://patreon.com/c/NotAsWePlanned

Follow the Podcast:

@notasweplanned_podcast

Tash:

@tash_blake_ivy

Carly:

@iamcarlyharris

Get the Planner:

https://notasweplanned.shop

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186 - I’d Just Given Birth When I Found THESE Messages On His Phone
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  • 186 - I’d Just Given Birth When I Found THESE Messages On His Phone

    Three weeks after giving birth, one Bestie woke in the middle of the night panicking that she’d missed an alarm to feed her newborn. She couldn’t find her own phone, so she picked up her husband’s to check the time… and messages from another woman appeared on the screen. She was still bleeding, wearing a postpartum nappy and caring for their two tiny children when she discovered her husband had been having an affair with a woman they both worked with, and it had been going on for months.


    This week we also hear from a woman whose boyfriend kissed someone on a night out, came home and abruptly ended their relationship, only to then ask if he could move back into their flat while they sell it. We tackle whether a four-hour long-distance relationship can realistically work when both people have children and lives they can’t relocate, and hear from a cancer survivor trying to date again after her husband’s betrayal left her terrified of letting another man in. Plus, Carly has another dating update, we give one Bestie’s Bumble profile a brutally honest makeover, and hear a confession that might genuinely make you delete Instagram and leave the country.

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    Wed, 16 Sep 2026 - 37min
  • 185 - Carly’s Dating Update Just Took A VERY Weird Turn…

    Carly thought she’d finally met someone who ticked all the boxes: great chemistry, great dates, hours spent talking on the phone and seemingly all the right things to say. Then she discovered he was sleeping with multiple women. But this week, the story takes an even stranger turn when she finds him back on Tinder… using a completely different name. Now she’s questioning whether she ever really knew who she was dating in the first place.


    We also hear from a woman whose affair with her married boss spiralled into years of broken promises, pregnancy, heartbreak and her private life being exposed at work; a listener who discovered her ex’s new girlfriend through a Daily Mail article; and a wife questioning the man she married after years of secrets and betrayal. Plus, we talk dating apps, trusting your gut, finding love after divorce and whether you can ever truly know the person you marry.


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    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Wed, 09 Sep 2026 - 44min
  • 184 - Young Parents, 3 Million Followers And Life Behind The Kern Family

    Eight months into their relationship, Charlotte found out she was pregnant at just 20 years old. From becoming young parents and figuring out their relationship along the way, to building a life online with an audience of over 3 million, this week we’re joined by Connor Kern and Charlotte Cucurnia from The Kern Family.


    We get into the reality behind the family you see online; becoming parents before they were prepared, the pressures it put on their relationship, arguments and learning how to communicate, why relationship therapy came up, raising three children and balancing family life with millions of people following along. Connor and Charlotte also open up about dealing with opinions and trolling online, maintaining trust with huge social followings and why the version of a relationship you see on social media is never the full picture.

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    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Wed, 02 Sep 2026 - 1h 26min
  • 183 - I Gave My Cheating Husband A Second Chance… 10 Years Later I Regret It

    She discovered her husband was having an affair, chose to forgive him and spent the next 10 years rebuilding their marriage… only to find herself right back where she started. This week, we hear from a woman questioning whether she wasted a decade after discovering the red flags had returned — and the receipts she eventually found left very little to the imagination. Now single at 50, she’s trying to stop blaming herself for staying and work out what comes next. 


    We also hear from a mum trapped in an increasingly controlling relationship who is terrified of how her partner will react to even the smallest decisions, discuss the reality of single parenting and not being able to be everywhere at once, reveal the ridiculously specific things our partners do that give us the ick, and answer a grandmother struggling with an ex-son-in-law who she believes is turning her grandchildren against her. Plus, possibly the worst use of a dog at Sunday lunch we’ve ever heard.

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    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Wed, 26 Aug 2026 - 40min
  • 182 - My Boyfriend Faked Cancer While My Mum Was Dying

    Imagine watching your mum die from cancer while the man you trust tells you his cancer has come back too… only to discover he made the whole thing up.


    This week we hear from a listener whose boyfriend lied about having cancer while her mum was terminally ill, before she discovered he had been cheating all along. We also hear from a woman who spent years trying to save her marriage through debt, lies and affairs, only to uncover another year-long relationship and experience the reality of post-separation abuse after finally leaving.


    Plus, we chat manifestation, dating red flags, what really gives us the ick, review another dating profile and share some very honest opinions along the way.

    Watch the podcast on YouTube


    Get a weekly BONUS episode on Patreon:


    Join Our Community

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    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    Wed, 19 Aug 2026 - 37min
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