Oh These, Those Stars of Space!

When a new spot opens up in a prestigious Choir of Space Angels, Bubbsriel (Carly Monardo) is summoned from the CSS Cavalier to Space Heaven to see if she's up to the task. She'll have to give it her all, because overseeing her trials are none other than Holy Attorney General Zacchaeus Zebulon (Christopher Hastings). Luckily, Bubbs will have help from a familiar face- gasp! Is that- Froglevel?!? (Ali Fisher) (it is).

UNLOCKED! As a special year-end treat, we're releasing one of our most popular episodes this year from behind the paywall! Enjoy to your heart's content, and hey, when you're done, if you want to check out more of the latest adventures on Oh These, Those Stars of Space, head over to our Patreon- you'll be glad you did! When ship systems begin to go strangely awry aboard the CSS Cavalier, Engineer Katya Bushnikova (Carly Monardo) and Groomda (Tim Platt) have little choice but call upon the help of the Cavalier's IT department. But when help arrives, they can't help but be intrigued by IT Specialist Ted Crount (Christopher Hastings). Yes...there's something strangely familiar about this Kiwi crewman...but what could it be?

When Vanguard Internal Affairs Officer Hank Pissed (Joe Lepore), arrives on the CSS Cavalier, he summons two top agents, Scandal (Carly Monardo) and Charity (Ali Fisher), to help him uncover a deadly mystery- and how does it involve Gelmire Lysander (Tim Platt) and Cubik, the Amazing Cube (Branson Reese)???

When Boboli (Carly Monardo), Single Chance (Tim Platt), and Guy Normal (Branson Reese), find themselves on an ancient starship, they find themselves in an adventure... 65 MILLION YEARS IN THE MAKING.

Ah yes, just another typical day aboard the CSS Cavalier for crewmembers like Vestavia (Carly Monardo), Gelmire Lysdander (Tim Platt), and Dr. Dewey (Christopher Hastings). But will it remain that way when Carlzoid Frontstuff (Guest Star RYAN NORTH) returns? No, no it won't. But they'll have plenty of time to figure that out...

When ship systems begin to go strangely awry aboard the CSS Cavalier, Engineer Katya Bushnikova (Carly Monardo) and Groomda (Tim Platt) have little choice but call upon the help of the Cavalier's IT department. But when help arrives, they can't help but be intrigued by IT Specialist Ted Crount (Christopher Hastings). Yes...there's something strangely familiar about this Kiwi crewman...but what could it be?

THE NEPHEWS RETURN! But will they all survive? Or will an encounter with the mysterious Jaish Al-Ghost (Joe Lepore) and his hunt for a mysterious artifact spell doom for Rupert (Christopher Hastings), Dupert (Carly Monardo), and Poopert (Branson Reese)?

Fresh out of a brief stay in Sick Bay, Coyote Ugly (Branson Reese) returns to active duty, on a seemingly simple mission with Dr Dewey (Christopher Hastings) and mild-mannered ensign Single Chance (Tim Platt). But will it remain as it seems, or will the discovery of an awe-inspiring alien creature cause hysteria aboard the CSS Cavalier and discord between the three characters we focus on in this episode? Guess you'll have to listen to find out!

When Werimether (Christopher Hastings) creates a new holozone program, the whole crew gets swept up by his fictional English Village: Little Tooting. I don't know why! You'd think they'd have really good video games in the future, but here we are. It even attracts the attention of Vee (Carly Monardo) and Ensign Single Chance (Tim Platt) an unremarkable officer who has nothing to do with The Teal Light, the mysterious space ranger from the Hope Corps who uses his magic ring to defend the Cavalier from cosmic threats!

Hello, Dear Audience! It's me, Joe Lepore- the one who says 'Wow' at the beginning of every episode, with a special announcement. Are you sitting down? Well stand up because it's going to be ok. The show isn't over. If you've listened to the Trek Draft or seen Tim's many tweets about becoming a hot air balloon guy, you know some exciting life changes have been happening behind the scenes at Bucket of Milk. So what does that mean for Oh These, Those Stars of Space? Well, starting next month, These Those will be going monthly, sticking to our one Patreon episode every month. If you're already a Patron, that's great! Nothing changes, you still get the brand-new episode every month that you're subscribed for. Not on the Patreon but wanna keep hearing new These Those? See what's happening with Deremeth, Dr Dewey, and the rest? Well then click that link in the show notes and subscribe, it will be the only place to hear the latest adventures on the CSS Cavalier! The existing episodes in the free feed will remain there, as well as monthly previews, but new full episodes are going to be exclusively on Patreon. So what are you waiting for? For only 5 dollars a month you help support the funniest and most physically attractive talents in podcasting, and get access to the continuing saga of Oh These Those Stars of Space. We'll see you over there! Ok you can sit back down now. Galactically, Joe

When Ship's Dentist and most-humanoid cat person Dr Surgery (Branson Reese) invites fellow cat-officers Chestershire (Ali Fisher) and Marvin Blond (Tim Platt) on a top-secret away mission, it's really anyone's guess what could be waiting for them on a distant moon, just a cryo-sleep away! Plus, a special cameo from Liberty Balboa (Branson Reese)

Boboli (Carly Monardo), Guy Normal (Branson Reese), and ship's Olympian Gene Lime (Tim Platt) meet two alien species that just can't get along. Who will come out on top? Who will end up with a wad of poison money in their mouth? And who will enjoy some delicious fruit? All this and more on tonight's OH THESE THOSE STARS OF SPAAAACE!

Rip Van Winkle (Tim Platt) is-what else?- dreaming, when he summoned by former foe Snoozebo (Joe Lepore) of the Cavalier to aid him in a dangerous quest to save the Dream Realm. And who shall Rip turn to in this dark hour? Why, Deremeth (Ali Fisher) and Clinton Bodycount (Branson Reese) are free!

When the Cavalier receives a mysterious distress signal, Gelmire Lysander (Tim Platt), Begonia Bloodterror (Christopher Hastings), and Billy Onassis (Branson Reese) head to investigate a derelict ship. But do they have the experience and maturity needed to uncover its secrets? Or will they gain it extremely quickly?

When Pluto Cloud-Atlas (Christopher Hastings) brings Scandal (Carly Monardo), Groomda (Tim Platt), and Chestershire (Ali Fisher) to the idyllic world of Jessbo-2, all he can hope for is that the Jessbens have totally normal laws that none of the crew violate!

Just when he thought it was safe in the Galaxy, Delicious Donald (Branson Reese) arrives in his personal hell. Meanwhile, Katya Bushnikova (Carly Monardo) and Mitzi Festerchild (Ali Fisher) investigate a series of strange disappearances on the planet's only settlement.

Spring has sprung, so it's no better time for a seasonal special, baby!! Join Joe, Ali, Chris, and Branson as they draft their dream Trek bridge crew, chat about Vulcans, oh and make one incredible surprise announcement. Don't miss it!

When Katya Bushnikova (Carly Monardo) is tasked with planning the Bachelorette Party for Meredith Chesterfield (Ali Fisher), she naturally invites Meredith's best fried, Gelmire Lysander (Tim Platt). But when Gelmire agrees to be 'just Meredith's friend' for the weekend, will an alluring suitor (Joe Lepore) come between them?

When the CSS Cavalier crosses paths with a centuries-old human spacecraft, Groomda (Tim Platt), Dr Dewey (Christopher Hastings), and Bubbsriel (Carly Monardo) lead the investigation. But what if, there in strange spacebound time capsule, there was a still-working cryopod, preserving an ancient spacefarer? What secrets could they share of the past? What horrors?

What would happen, one wonders, if that villainous mastermind Darkly Gameover (Joe Lepore), hacked into the CSS Cavalier holozone to create a series of deathtraps to test Liberty Balboa (Branson Reese) and Mitzi Festerchild (Ali Fisher)? Would they rise to the occasion? Would they get stuck in the first deathtrap and in the interest of time Darkly would be forced to jettison the rest? One wonders!!

Reeling from the events of last episode, Begonia Bloodterror (Chris Hastings) and his time-travelling companions Vee (Carly Monardo) and Oberon Coaxial (Branson Reese) race across dystopian Antarctica to stop Begonia's son's evil plan. But will the aid of a shocking ally be enough to help save the day? All this and the continuing adventures of Gleep Glorp (Joe Lepore).

When ship's Tactician Begonia BloodTerror (Christopher Hastings), is brought to the future by some time-lost compatriots Vestavi-er, Vee, and Oberon Coaxial (Carly Monardo and Branson Reese), his hopes for a wonderful utopia are dashed. No, I'm afraid the future is not a wonderful utopia, dear listener- it's a bad *dystopia*!! But what is Begonia's personal connection to all this? And what if the dystopia doesn't seem so bad to him? All this and the exciting debut of Gleep Glorp (Joe Lepore)!

When Scandal (Carly Monardo) and Charity (Ali Fisher) are summoned to their High School reunion, will they recapture the glory of youth? Rekindle old flames? Discover childhood secrets? All that and more??? PLUS: Gelmire Lysander (Tim Platt) seeks professional advice.

In order to pass through a dangerous Correxian checkpoint, the CSS Cavalier is shrunk down to the size of a coin, and escorted secretly by Dr. Dewey (Christopher Hastings) and Klaus Kitski (Branson Reese). With the lives of everyone aboard the ship in their literal hands, will Dewey and Klaus rise to the occasion? Or will their checkered pasts come back to haunt them?

When Dr Dewey (Christopher Hastings), Bubbsriel (Carly Monardo), and Guy Normal (Branson Reese), get stuck in a hyperlift aboard the CSS Cavalier, everyone decides to do the sensible thing and calmly wait until help arrives. Or do they???

It's a bird! It's a plane! No...it's a podcast! It's the end of the year, and as we kick back and relax, Joe, Carly, and Tim gather round that cosmic fire with a mug of hot cocoa and DRAFT THEIR FAVORITE ALIENS. Who will have the best crew of creatures from beyond the stars when the dust settles? Listen and find out, please!

When Ensign Gelmire Lysander (Tim Platt), Ship's Cat Chestershire (Ali Fisher), and Ship's Mortician Clinton Bodycount (Branson Reese), need emergency shuttlecraft repairs on the abandoned mining planet SilvGold-7, they find themselves in a *gulp* ghost town. But surely the local legend of a ghostly miner who haunts the mines is nothing more than a spooky story...isn't it? For our heroes' sake, I hope so.

It seems like a pretty typical day for the CSS Cavalier's chief scientist/tentacle monster Groomda (Tim Platt), until a mysterious figure from Groomda's past (Christopher Hastings) arrives to call him home. Will he leave his new life behind? Meanwhile, can Liberty Balboa (Branson Reese) win the heart of Princess Tyrexibeth??

The holidays have arrived at the CSS Cavalier, so naturally Ship's Event Planner Marvin Blond (Tim Platt) is on hand to host a preview of Delicious Donald's (Branson Reese) latest wintertime confections. But when adorable orphan Boboli (Carly Monardo) notices something strange about Guy Normal, well, who knows what could happen! I can't believe we get to make this show!

Sometimes, dear listener, family reunions aren't 100% joyful. I know this may come as a shock to you, all the more reason you'll relate to Meredith Chesterfield (Ali Fisher), when she's visited by her twin siblings Bester Meth (Branson Reese) and Hester Beth Chesterfield (Carly Monardo), who come bearing bad news. For a hint as to what, see the episode title!

When Guy Normal (Branson Reese), Begonia Bloodterror (Christopher Hastings), and Boboli (Carly Monardo) settle in for a peaceful night's sleep, little do they know they are about to embark on an adventure, not across space, but across the very dreamscape!

When our three Mages- Deremeth (Ali Fisher), Werimether (Christopher Hastings), and Jodge the Middle Mage (Carly Monardo) find themselves sent to a planet torn by war can they help its people recover and rebuild? Or will they just get wrapped up in squabbles about Luck Magic? Also Kwoo (Joe Lepore) shows up. Wait-Kwoo? THEE KWOO? Uh oh!

By the end of this episode, you'll be like "Rip Van Winkle? More like Rip...Van...Twinkle Toes!" DRAMATIS PERSONAE Bubbsriel (Carly Monardo) Pluto Cloud-Atlas (Christopher Hastings) Rip Van Winkle (Tim Platt)

Down on an alien world, ambitious ensign Gelmire Lysander (Tim Platt), finds himself on a bit of a wild Goose chase when trying to form a Triumvirate of Guys with Liberty Balboa (Branson Reese) and Dr Dewey (Christopher Hastings). Meanwhile, Katya Bushnikova (Carly Monardo) and Meredith Chesterfield (Ali Fisher) try to bond as only a bride and her maid of honor can. But will a visitor with a connection to Meredith's past ruin everything?

Even Groomda needs a break sometimes! Instead of a classic These Those adventure, Joe "Close Encounter" Lepore, Christopher "Area 51" Hastings, and Branson "Little Green Man" Reese are getting together to discuss the possibility of life...out there. And don't worry, they don't go on any tangents!

When Gelmi-ahem, Liberty Balboa (Branson Reese) is invited to an exclusive dinner party at the mansion of video game madman Darkly Gameover, how can he say no? And who better to bring along than Bubbsriel (Carly Monardo) and Werimether (Christopher Hastings)? And who said anything about murder?

Ship's Junior Mortician Vestavia Casketshowroom (Carly Monardo) discovers the perfect wedding gift for Gelmire Lysander (Tim Platt) and Meredith Chesterfield (Ali Fisher)- Azure Skyberries from the cloud planet Cirri-7, which are in season for the first time in 500 years! But who will guide them to retrieve this gift? Perhaps the enigmatic Oberon Coaxial (Branson Reese)? But does this mysterious and rugged figure know more of our heroes than he lets on? And will everyone be coming home from this adventure?

When a Vanguard Tentacle Expert arrives on the ship, Groomda (Tim Platt) can't be far behind. And when that Tentacle Man has an old friend aboard- Helmsman Pluto Cloud-Atlas (Christopher Hastings) can't be far behind either. And when a weird asteroid crashes into the ship? Well that rock's mysterious passenger (Carly Monardo) absolutely cannot be far behind. Hope they can keep up, but has everyone been doing their cardio?

Scandal (Carly Monardo) and Begonia (Christopher Hastings) are put off at first when they meet the grim and mysterious photographer Lestecheth Feldermeld (Ali Fisher). But don't worry! Her camera reveals the specter of death :D Join our Patreon now for tons more stuff, including AN ENTIRE ADDITIONAL EPISODE EVERY MONTH for patrons only. You can go listen to all of them now! Go! Hurry! It's only five bucks. And follow us on twitter, but only if you like pleasure, at @ohthesethose Oh These, Those Stars of Space is powered by Lasers & Feelings, the perfect ttrpg, by the brilliant John Harper The Oh These, Those Stars of Space Theme was created, arranged, and composed by Huge Today. We like it too! Thank you for saying that!. Additional music and sound design from the great Michael Ghelfi. Find his work on YouTube, and support that good stuff on Patreon.

Sacre Bleu...cow?? When Dr. Dewey (Christopher Hastings), grizzled veteran Klaus Kitski (Branson Reese), and ship's Translator Très Bien (Tim Platt) meet for a pleasant evening at the CSS Cavalier's Bowling Alley, they'll unfortunately have to take a raincheck for the 'pleasant' part. Because something very strange is going on with the rest of the crew. And in a world full of auto-translators, is this finally Très Bien's time to shine?

When Junior Mortician Vestavia (Carly Monardo), Ship's Agent Billy Onassis (Branson Reese), and Mage of Ill Portent (Christopher Hastings), find themselves on the bridge of the CSS Cavalier, we can only hope they won't be called upon to save the ship in a moment of crisis. They are not equipped to take that kind of thing on!

When plucky Ensign Gelmire Lysander (Tim Platt), ship's ENT Dr, Dewey (Chrisopher Hastings) and junior mortician Vestavia Casketshowroom (Carly Monardo) take in the many constellations from the CSS Cavalier's Observation Deck, it's sure to be an evening full of stars. But the stars are even closer than they think, when a mysterious traveler comes aboard (Guest Star RYAN NORTH). Does this voyager bring news from the future, or more trouble to their doorstep? Maybe both!

When the Flora Regnant of Angio Prime falls gravely ill, ship's tactician Begonia Bloodterror (Christopher Hastings) is whisked away from the Cavalier for what can only be an impending funeral. But when we're talking kings and sucessions, even he can't be caught unawares! For aboard this flowering starship are Hellebore (Carly Monardo) and Magentena Chokevenom (Ali Fisher), sisters from a noble house who seem to have taken a keen interest in our dear Begonia...

On a critical mission for the CSS Cavalier, Ensign Gelmire Lysander (Tim Platt) and his bodyguards Scandal (Carly Monardo) and Charity Mesterfield (Ali Fisher) have nowhere to turn but to an old friend: Xander Mercutio, governor of the Ring City of Relzax. Not only is he willing to help our heroes, he's coincidentally just made a deal to ensure the continued independence of his station. Rad!

Having finally earned a promotion, Ensi-er, Lieutenant Junior Grade Bubbsriel (Carly Monardo) leads a crack team including Blooperno Illion (Christopher Hastings) and ship's chocolatier Delicious Donald (Branson Reese) down to Marsus-4 for an away mission. But will they find the galaxium they're looking for? Or will they find lots of marvelous treats for Delicious Donald to enjoy? Or will they find something much darker?? Or a mix of all that??? LISTEN TO FIND OUT!

50th Episode! When a mysterious warning is issued for Deck 52, brothers Rupert (Christopher Hastings), Dupert (Carly Monardo), and Poopert (Branson Reese) take the case! But are they in over their feathered heads?

When a mysterious door appears before three Cavalier crewmembers, they find themselves freed from the hustle-bustle of the galaxy. Each is faced with a momentous choice. Will Werimether (Christopher Hastings) choose to live as a Mage of Good Fortune? Will Groomda (Tim Platt) find love? And will ship's Actor Hercules EGOT (Branson Reese) find a stage big enough for him? And will these choices take them away from the Cavalier- Forever??

It's probably Gelmire. With Ali Fisher as Charity Mesterfield, Branson Reese as Guy Normal, Carly Monardo as Scandal, Christopher Hastings as Dr. Dewey, Taylor Moore as Tuscaloosa Casketshowroom, and Tim Platt as *gulp* Gelmire Lysander.

Every 8 years, the deadliest lifeforms of the galaxy gather to determine the next champion. The Great Tournament is secret. Deadly. Illegal. Kind of hot? Brutal. Its name is only whispered, for fear of a karate chop to the skull. That name? FIGHTSTAR. *Thwack* *Narrator Dies* This years combatants? Liberty Balboa (Branson Reese). Groomda (Tim Platt). Carboat Bin Laden (Taylor Moore). May they die glorious deaths!

Though beloved members of our heroic crew, sometimes officers Clare President (Taylor Moore) and Rip Van Winkle (Tim Platt) can feel like outsiders. And when the ship's hot new schoolmaster, Ichabod Crane (Branson Reese) threatens Rip's status as "Ship's Public Domain Washington Irving Character Brought to Life", he starts to wonder, do I belong here at all? Even Clare seems to love him! No one even cares that Ichabod slept with Rip's wife like 700 years ago! Maybe the only thing that can keep him is an important lesson... of friendship.

Gigantix. The name itself causes hearts across the galaxy to flutter with wonder and adventure. The ship of dreams. The voyager of miracles. The Jewel of the Correxian-Vermont Alliance. The finest and largest starship ever built. On a ship this perfect, they don't even need to bother with escape pods!! [note to self- insert more obvious foreshadowing here]. Yes, should be a totally normal voyage indeed for Ensign Bubbsriel (Carly Monardo), Begonia Bloodterror (Christopher Hastings), and Carboat Bin Laden (Taylor Moore). Gigantix.

Backyard Pyle (Taylor Moore). Dr. Thomas Dewey (Christopher Hastings). Groomda (Tim Platt). Three of the finest officers to ever serve aboard the Cavalier. Three heroes who have risked their lives to explore the galaxy. Three legends...on a daring quest...for missing stuff.

A hunt for a fresh navcomputer leads Gelmire Lysander (Tim Platt), Liberty Balboa (Branson Reese), and Baron Baudelaire (Taylor Moore) to MaxMax-3, a bleak desert world where only the strong survive. Here, laws and manners have been gutted and left for dead by the side of the road, replaced by steel and leather. And if our heroes are ever going to make it out with their prize, they'll need something even rarer than a navcomputer on MaxMax-3—they'll need hope.

When the crew of the Cavalier discovers a shipwreck in deep space with ties to their past, you won't be shocked to learned they send an away team to check it out. Including our heroes Bubbsriel (Carly Monardo), Legs Loveless (Taylor Moore), and Scorpio Ni-Yeer (Branson Reese). But what happens next? Something you never thought possible. It will take everything they've got—and maybe the luck of a new friend—to get out of this one.

Ah, Starhaven. A simple, happy community, and the perfect place to raise a family, like loving siblings Groomda (Tim Platt), Baron Baudelaire (Taylor Moore), and Guy Normal (Branson Reese). And don't forget their talking cat, Chestershire (Ali Fisher)! Oh? What's that impossible dream they all shared, of serving aboard a starship travelling across the galaxy? No, it's probably nothing!

While the crew mourns a fallen comrade, duty still calls for Katya Bushnikova (Carly Monardo), Liberty Balboa (Branson Reese), and Clare President (Taylor Moore). And, with the Cavalier's water reserves running low, they are sent- where else? AQUWORLD. Hope everything goes...swimmingly. Follow us on twitter, but only if you like pleasure, at @ohthesethose

Following the discovery of a long-lost android brother, Threadcount-900 (Christopher Hastings) works tirelessly to revive this unexpected family link, ignoring all distractions, like Liberty Balboa (Branson Reese) and Marvin Blond (Tim Platt). But will Threadcount ever find a way to power on his robotic sibling Scion (Taylor Moore)? And will this be a joyous family reunion...or an unjoyous one?

When their old Professor pays a visit to the Cavalier, Deremith, the Mage of Good Fortune (Ali Fisher), and Werimether, the Mage of Ill Portent (Christopher Hastings) are thrilled to reminisce about their school days. But when little bambino Limoncello (Taylor Moore) enters the picture, surely nothing will go wrong. With all that awesome power and penchant for mischief, nothing could wrong. I'm not budging on this.

Yuletide Kombat Family is a game where holiday themed characters fight to save Christmas. This time, however, the These Those crew puts a whole new spin on the word “SEASON” looooooool! You’ll figure it out once you listen! I love you! Produced [and this episode description written -.ed] by Tim Platt with additional music from Steve Desiena.

It's high stakes on the Illegal Moon of Scrutum-6, where adventurers Cheredith Mesterfield (Ali Fisher) and her trusty Spacehorse Scandal (Carly Monardo) make a rendezvous with undercover allies Backyard Pyle (Taylor Moore) and Begonia Bloodterror (Christopher Hastings) on a dangerous mission. But they'll need every bit of luck they can find, if they hope to escape THE FELONIOUS PALACE OF LORD MENACE THE SHAKK.

With errands to run, Ensign Gelmire Lysander (Tim Platt) and Vape Salesman Carboat Bin Laden (Taylor Moore), hope to squeeze in a little fun while on the Gaming Moon of Scrutum-6. Let's just hope there's no one waiting down there with a a score to settle. And no, we don't mean a video game score. Branson Reese (Rude Tales of Magic, FX's Swan Boy) also stars.

When the Cavalier's most-eligible Bachelorette, Vestavia Casketshowroom (Carly Monardo), crosses paths with its most-affianced ensign, Gelmire Lysander (Tim Platt), will Gelmire's love for Meredith Chesterfield be put to the test? And with Clinton Bodycount (Branson Reese) playing cupid, does Gelmire even stand a chance?

When a Vanguard Commbadge is detected on the dangerous and mysterious planet Lucifar, it's up to Baron Baudelaire (Taylor Moore) and Billy Onassis (Branson Reese), the Cavalier's most devilish crew, to solve the mystery. A mission to the most hellish planet in the galaxy? It's times like this they wish ship martyr Eusebius Carter (Tim Platt) was still around, but he died months ago...didn't he?

When routine maintenance uncovers something deep in the Cavalier's computer core from a fallen comrade, it's up to Legs Loveless (Taylor Moore), Threadcount-900 (Christopher Hastings), and ship's agent Billy Onassis (Branson Reese) to save the crew from this rogue program. But can even these three get out of such a sticky situation???

Ship's Tactician Begonia Bloodterror (Christopher Hastings) is a master strategist. But all his plans are thrown out the window when two small urchins, Boboli (Carly Monardo) and Limoncello (Taylor Moore), sneak up from the abandoned alleyways of Deck 31 with ominous news. Can Begonia take on this dangerous test and save the Cavalier? Will Boboli and Limoncello ever find a papa? And can Begonia comprehend the awesome power of ANDIAMO???

Ship's ENT Doctor Dewey (Christopher Hastings), his wife, Documentarian Ilse Schlacht (Carly Monardo), and Vape Salesman Carboat Bin Laden (Taylor Moore) are attempting to enjoy some simple shore leave when something unexpectedly *lunar* gets in their way. PLUS: When Ilse gets the call of a lifetime, what changes will it bring??

When the Vanguard receives a surprise message from a reclusive world somehow associated with feet, it's up to Threadcount-900 (Christopher Hastings), Guy Normal (Branson Reese), Chestershire (Ali Fisher), Legs Loveless (Taylor Moore), and Ship's Cobbler Cargo Pantangelo (Guest Star MATTIE LUBCHANSKY) to crack this high-stakes diplomatic encounter. But in a situation this tense, is the crew of the Cavalier ready to dive in...feet first???

"...Family Members including Tuscaloosa Casketshowroom (Taylor Moore), Vestavia Casketshowroom (Carly Monardo), and Froglevel Casketshowroom (Ali Fisher)."

Captured at the end of the last episode, hopes for our heroes grow dim as the clock ticks towards their scheduled rendezvous. Gelmire Lysander (Tim Platt), Blooperno Illion (Christopher Hastings), and Carboat Bin Laden (Taylor Moore), are relentlessly interrogated by Correxian agents, including some...familiar faces? It will take a miracle, or maybe an old friend, to get them out...

Behind Enemy Lines, Gelmire Lysander (Tim Platt) leads a crack team including telepathic agent Blooperno Illion (Christopher Hastings) and mild-mannered, innocent vape salesman Carboat Bin Laden (Taylor Moore) to uncover a Correxian propaganda plan. But when things start going off the rails, can young Gelmire keep his team alive and on track? And what happens when they cross paths with a mysterious revolutionary...

PREVIEW: The Vanguard presents gaseous crewmate Clare President (Taylor Moore) with his first opportunity to eat, and along with the meal sends as an emissary Liberty Balboa's (Branson Reese) old culinary school chum, celebrity chef Guinevere Tot (Carly Monardo). But could a recipe for reconnection and fond nostalgia be curdled by a dash of...ulterior motives? You'll simply have to listen to find out!

With the Cavalier's Hyperwarp Drive out of commission, grizzled veteran Backyard Pyle (Taylor Moore) assembles a crack team including ship's contrarian Scorpio Ni-Yeer (Branson Reese) and legendary napper Rip Van Winkle (Tim Platt), to hunt on the surface of a dangerous jungle planet for the phenomenon that's got our ship stuck. But sometimes truth (this is a nonfiction podcast) is stranger than fiction...

After a scheduling error in the holozone leads Baron Baudelaire (Taylor Moore), ship's Pet Chestashire (Ali Fisher), and Ship's Mortician Clinton Bodycount (Branson Reese) into making their own fun, even that is interrupted when our heroes intercept a shocking transmission. But, in order to save the day, they risk revealing their identities to the Correxians and putting every life aboard the Cavalier in grave danger. Yes, *Grave* Danger. Whatever will they do???

When Gelmire Lysander (Tim Platt), Meredith Chesterfield (Ali Fisher), Baron Baudelaire (Taylor Moore), Threadcount-900 (Christopher Hastings), and ship's movie critic Shemp Fortunes (Branson Reese), decide to blow off a little steam in the holozone, they think they're in for an afternoon of fun. But when something goes wrong, the ship's computers birth something... spooky, which in turn births something even... spookier, and I'll be honest, things really unravel from there.

It's vacation time as the Cavalier makes a pitstop at legendary pleasure planet Xanadu Hard. But when pilot Legs Loveless (Taylor Moore) has a dangerous liaison, it's up to him and the ship's mages of Good Fortune, Deremith (Ali Fisher), and Ill Portent, Werimether (Christopher Hastings) to set things right and keep the peace in paradise...

PART TWO (OF TWO)- Following the shocking events of last episode, Katya Bushnikova (Carly Monardo), Dr. Dewey (Christopher Hastings), and a critically wounded Legs Loveless (Taylor Moore), discover a shocking secret of the Concilium, courtesy of an unlikely new ally (Tim Platt). Meanwhile, their only chance of unshrinking themselves goes missing, setting our heroes on a path to a thrilling a confrontation.

When a routine medical exam goes horribly awry, Dr Dewey (Christopher Hastings), Katya Bushnikova (Carly Monardo), and Legs Loveless (Taylor Moore), find even the good doctor's office can be full of danger around every corner! PLUS: The Mystery of What Was in Katya's Ear!

While headed off to a routine mission, Backyard Pyle (Taylor Moore), Dr. Dewey (Christopher Hastings), and ship pleasure droid Don Valentino (Branson Reese) disappear! And not in the usual way! In a different, *weird* way! It's up to Clare President (also Taylor Moore), Threadcount-900 (Christopher Hastings again), and Liberty Balboa (Branson Reese x2) to find their compatriots- by any means necessary. And can Don Valentino, teach an alien who only knows war- love???

An already exciting occasion in sleepy Hudfar village is made all the more momentous when three mysterious strangers arrive in town. With no knowledge of their true identities, The deathly pallid Bed (Christopher Hastings), beautifully-haired Keith (Taylor Moore), and giant cockroach Garr-gall (Branson Reese), struggle to make sense of their place in this unfamiliar world. And what is that strange sense of longing...for the stars?

When an isolated planet with fantastic technology and beloved wines stands on the brink of destruction, it's up to Threadcount-900 (Christopher Hastings), Backyard Pyle (Taylor Moore), and Marvin Blond (Tim Platt) to sit them down and undestruct that brink. Also what's this about a rocket? And a baby?

Far from the the light of the Cavalier, these are those VANGUARD NIGHTS: apocrypha, ephemera, and straight up goofins' "in" the "world" of Oh These Those Stars of Space. As our first Vanguard Night we present to you our 2021 Thanksgiving Hangover Special! The CAST of the show are long dead but their future clones are THRUST into danger as part of a black-ops Vanguard experiment. Can they survive!??? No!

Heads up DUDES! It's the audio from our first (FREE for Patrons) live stream: MAN MOON RISING. Liberty Balboa, Mitzy, Gelmire, Threadcount and Legs are sent to find a long lost colony on the moon of Testoster 1. But what's this? In the relatively brief time they've been out of contact with the Concilloium, the colonists have developed into a world ruled by...men? What possible reason could the colonists have for adopting such and odd and strange way of life? And can the crew of the CSS Cavalier stop them from spreading their inexplicable insanity to the rest of the galaxy? Will they dare to break RULE #2 if it means they can consign these backwards people to...HIStory? Find out now, or at your leisure!

Hear Ye, Hear Ye! A mysterious structure from the distant past appears off the bow of the Cavalier, and Ensign Bubbsriel (Carly Monardo), Father Matthew Sagittarius (Christopher Hastings), and Mary (Ali Fisher), decide to investigate. And can Groomda (Tim Platt) quit it with the Halloween preparations long enough to help out??

After the first two minutes of this episode, you might think there's nothing but silence for the next 60 minutes. BUT KEEP LISTENING. I promise it's worth it. Hell, maybe Cavvy the Cavalier (Branson Reese), Tuscaloosa Casketshowroom (Taylor Moore), and Groomda (Tim Platt) show up. How?? You'll just have to find out...

When an old "friend" of Baron Baudelaire interrupts a wedding planning party, Meredith Chesterfield (Ali Fisher) Gelmire Lysander (Tim Platt) and the Baron himself (Taylor Moore) must travel to the speed moon of Vroomex 9 and put their very lives on the line; the FINISH LINE that is!

Following a party in the Engine Room, pilot Legs Loveless (Taylor Moore) calls Katya Bushnikova (Carly Monardo), Threadcount 900 (Christopher Hastings), and rookie engineer Mitzy Festerchild (Ali Fisher), to the bridge to hear a mysterious transmission. When it's decoded, its contents will shock and disturb you. PLUS: Where did Groomda (Tim Platt) go?!

In the middle of rehearsal for a new play, the crew of the Cavalier is blinded by a strange and powerful blast of light from a nearby planet. Can the crew overcome their fear of getting "goo hole" and investigate its origins? Once those origins are found, will the crew risk it all to do the right thing? Is it true that that all the world's a stage and that all the men and women merely players? Cause if so, that is crazy! Starring Tim Platt as Groomda, Carly Monardo as Katya Bushnikova, Taylor Moore as Legs Loveless, and introducing Christopher Hastings as Dr. Dewey, ENT.

¡Snagged! In the midst of a security shakedown, the Cavalier is suddenly caught in a vast and mysterious alien artifact. With power reserves dwindling, Threadcount 900 and a trio of potential criminals, (a Space Angel, a bingo caller, and the proprietor of the ship's only for-profit pleasure dome) must journey into harm's way to discover the terrible truth of their ensnarement. Starring Christopher Hastings as Threadcount 900, and introducing Branson Reese as Jimmy Pencils, Carly Monardo as Bubbsriel, and Taylor Moore as Baron Baudelaire. ALL ages welcome, but a discount is available for seniors.

On a routine mission, Capt. Cal Sisters and the crew of the CSS Cavalier are commandeered by a strange being with God-like powers and must make a terrible choice. Can they survive his impossible game? What happens next may surprise you, if you find dramatic twists of fate surprising that is. Maybe you don't!

What that show do? How's it gonna work? What's the "deal" with this p'cast? You've got questions and the producers and cast of Oh These, Those Stars of Space have got the answers. One need only listen. Hailing frequencies...open. And the Patreon is LIVE NOW! Join the subscription Vanguard and receive a whole additional episode on release day, and then every single damn month forever. Go to patreon.com/ohthesethosestarsofspace and make it so.

From the rag-tag renegades behind Rude Tales of Magic, comes the new Sci-Fi "song of the summer" OH THESE, THOSE STARS OF SPACE. Join them as they improvise episodic adventures as the wayward crew of the starship CSS Cavalier, armed only with their raving ids and a screenshot of the PDF of Lasers and Feelings (created by ttrpg genius John Harper). Ah to fare that horizonless sky and together our fortune find, among oh these, those stars of space!