The Hook Up

We’re on a little break! But we’re dipping into the archive to bring you the best moments provided by some of our favourite guests! From VERY controversial hot takes from comedians Will Gibb and Daniel Foxx, to Angela White’s sex advice on squirting and eating pussy, chatting threesomes with Hunter Smith and unpacking queer female sexuality with Jordan Barr and height in dating with Blake Pavey - we revisit our favourite moments!     DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

What happens when you don't end up with the life you always dreamt of? For writer Sheree Joseph it was getting married and having kids. But after her long-term relationship ended and an unsuccessful fertility journey, she had to face a future she never expected for herself. In this chat, Sheree chats to Dee about her journey, the grief she experienced, and what it’s been like to embrace being single and child-free in her early 30s. SHOW NOTES: Sheree Joseph Memoir Juicy - https://publishing.hardiegrant.com/en-au/books/juicy-by-sheree-joseph/9780645858136  Sheree Joseph IG - https://www.instagram.com/shereewriter/    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

We’re on a little break! But we’re dipping into the archive to bring you the best stories provided by YOU - our extremely sexy smart cool listeners! From cum-piphanies and public break ups, to pleasure dom mommy’s and meeting soulmates in the rideshare - we revisit our favourite and most memorable voice memos sent in by The Hook Up fam.     DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

After being made redundant from his dream job as an investigative journalist, Bension Siebert turned to sex work to make money and surprised himself by how much he enjoyed it. In this ep, Bension chats to Dee about ‘coming out’ with his new profession, the reaction online and what he’s learnt about the industry. SHOW NOTES: Bension’s Cheek Article - https://cheekmedia.substack.com/p/how-sex-work-saved-my-investigative Bension’s IG - https://www.instagram.com/bensionfindsout/    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

We all know the phrase but does dating someone who’s completely different to you actually work? In this ep, we hear your stories of dating people who are opposite in lifestyle, interests and core values, compared to people who’ve dated similar - and find out if compatibility can work both ways. SHOW NOTES: Why Do Opposites Attract? https://www.verywellmind.com/is-it-true-that-opposites-attract-in-relationships-5194818 Global study on opposites do not attract: https://www.psypost.org/why-opposites-dont-attract-a-global-study-reveals-the-true-rules-of-romantic-compatibility/ https://economictimes.indiatimes.com/news/international/us/why-opposites-dont-always-attract-a-global-study-of-41606-people-across-74-countries-found-shared-values-matter-most-while-believing-your-partner-is-kinder-and-more-attractive-predicts-happier-relationships/articleshow/132179722.cms?from=mdr   Perceived similarities in couples: https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/02654075251349720?utm_source=chatgpt.com Effects of similarity of life goals, values, and personality on relationship satisfaction and stability: https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1111/j.1475-6811.2012.01417.x?utm_source=chatgpt.com     DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Going through heartbreak can be one of the most painful experiences and sometimes those break up scars don’t leave - when you start dating again. So in this ep, we chat to Dr Marny Lishman about the walls we put up after being hurt, how to heal and trust in love again.  SHOW NOTES: Break Up Podcast - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ac0wdFkrIUA  Dr Marny Lishman - https://www.marnylishman.com.au/  Only You: The Unexpected Gift Of Being Alone - https://www.marnylishman.com.au/books      DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

We can all agree that break ups are a universally shit experience, whether it’s a long term relationship or situationship. In this episode we’re unpacking all the challenges and questions you have - should you go no contact? How long should you wait before hooking up with someone new? Are my friends sick of hearing about my heartbreak? And can a break up actually be a good thing for ~personal development~? SHOW NOTES Breakup Glowup - https://www.tiktok.com/@yourfree_therapy/video/7534079578067750164 Rebound - https://breeze-wellbeing.com/blog/what-is-a-rebound-relationship/ Marie Claire Glow Up - https://www.marieclaire.co.uk/news/science-behind-glow-ups-669161    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

There are millions of posts on TikTok all about ‘spicy books’ and someone who’s become famous for reviewing them is author and content creator Tierney Page. In this ep, she chats about why she thinks there’s been a massive rise in people reading and posting about romantasy and smut, her fav tropes and genres and her journey to becoming an author.  SHOW NOTES: watch our romantasy ep with Esme Louise James here - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MXKoC94haC4  Tierney Page TikTok here - https://www.tiktok.com/@tierney.reads?lang=en    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Whether you have or haven’t read books like Heated Rivalry, A Court of Thorns and Roses or Fourth Wing, you can’t deny the rise in smutty literature. In 2025 romantasy and sports romance experienced triple-digit growth.   But there’s been some criticism around how DR and romantasy books often glamourise SA and are too accessible for young readers. In today’s episode Dee is joined by guest co-host Esme James, a sex historian and author, to discuss why we’re all so obsessed with fantasy smut.    SHOW NOTES:   https://lighthouse.mq.edu.au/article/2026/feb-2026/romance-revival-why-we-love-stories-about-love?utm_source=chatgpt.com    Why romance novels thrive on tiktok - https://www.abc.net.au/news/2023-12-27/why-romance-and-romantasy-novels-are-so-popular-on-tiktok/103198518?utm_source=chatgpt.com    Esme’s book! https://www.simonandschuster.com/authors/Esme-Louise-James/244716193    Dr Esme Louise James IG - https://www.instagram.com/esme.louisee/?hl=en      DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Whether it’s drugs, alcohol, or gambling - addiction can be one of the hardest things to navigate in a relationship. In this episode we chat to clinical psychologist Donna Stambulich about her experience with amphetamine addiction, the impact it has on relationships and how to best support your partner or loved one.  SHOW NOTES: Lifeline - 13 11 14  Donna Stambulich - https://nppsych.com.au/our-psychologists  Recode Me -  https://recode-me.com.au/  Episode with Luke Bateman on Gambling - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KTl8Royc2rU&t=16s    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

What’s the bet you or someone you know has been affected by gambling? Probably pretty high. Around 3 million Australians experience some sort of gambling harm each year. And 1.2 million Australians are affected by someone else's gambling. And it can have a real impact on your dating or love life.  In today’s episode we speak with Luke Bateman, ex-NRL star turned author, about his past addiction and tips on reaching the other side.    SHOW NOTES:   Lifeline - 13 11 14   Gambling Helpline - 1800 858 858 Gambling Help Online - https://www.gamblinghelponline.org.au/    Luke Bateman IG - https://www.instagram.com/lukebateman_/?hl=en   Luke Bateman Australian Story - https://www.abc.net.au/news/2026-07-27/turning-the-page-luke-bateman/106963436    Compulsive Gambling - https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/compulsive-gambling/symptoms-causes/syc-20355178    The Psychology of Gambling Addiction: https://equilibriapcs.com/the-psychology-of-gambling-addiction-why-the-brain-craves-the-bet/   Gambling Disorder Psychology: https://www.reachlink.com/advice/general/gambling-disorder-psychology/

Who has the right to tell queer stories and profit off them? That’s the main theme author Josh Silver explores in his latest book Fruit Fly. The book follows a writer who befriends a young gay addict so she can use his story to write a best seller.  In this ep, Dee chats to Josh about his own story as an ex addict, the world of chem sex parties, and why it’s important to share perspectives of gay pain and trauma. SHOW NOTES:  Lifeline: 13 11 14 QLife: https://qlife.org.au/  Josh Silver IG: https://www.instagram.com/joshsilverauthor/?hl=en  Fruit Fly: https://www.bloomsbury.com/au/fruit-fly-9781836432395/  Melbourne event: https://www.wheelercentre.com/events-tickets/season-2026/josh-silver-fruit-fly Brisbane event: https://bwf.org.au/2026/brisbane-writers-festival/josh-silver-fruit-fly   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Have you ever felt pressure to have a certain kind of sex?  Sex positivity has been an incredible movement which has normalised and destigmatised adventurous, kinky and casual sex. But has that come at a cost? In this ep, we’re joined by guest co-host psychologist and sexologist Laura Lee to unpack whether sex positivity and hook up culture has created a new type of pressure and expectation to perform. SHOW NOTES: A women’s right to say ‘meh’ - https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2015/oct/10/sex-positivity-sexuality-ambivalence-feminism  How sex positivity lost its way: https://katemanne.substack.com/p/how-sex-positivity-lost-its-way  How Sexual information (CONT) : https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC9825060/  5 ways to have better sex in a relationship - https://www.psychologytoday.com/au/blog/experimentations/201710/5-ways-have-better-sex-in-relationship Couples’ sexual communication and dimensions of sexual function: A meta-analysis \https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC6699928/  Fetish 101: Vanilla - https://www.hudapp.com/blog/fetish-101-vanilla  How the sexual revolution changed the world https://youtu.be/VdDERcyouWs?si=9icswXNioUtwZ3g0 The canadian journal of human sexuality https://utppublishing.com/doi/full/10.3138/cjhs.2017-0017

Surprise! We've got a Saturday Bonus ep for you! You probably heard all about Ben Ilobuchi's situationship troubles in this weeks episode. But did you hear the beef? Dee becomes The Grill's first guest to sear some rogue relationship-specific beefs like ghosting, the ick, and having to sleep in a bed with your partner.  DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

If you’re dating, hooking up with, talking to, or seeing someone but you don’t know where things are going and you don’t know how to bring it up… Dating coach and author Erika Ettin has got you! In this ep, she has some tough love for anyone in a situationship, and will help you have the exclusive/relationship chat.  SHOW NOTES: Situationship Ep: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17Qr9ovC2N0  Erika Ettin Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alittlenudge/?hl=en    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Are you dating or hooking up with someone right now and you’re not really sure what’s going on? It feels like a relationship but you’ve never had the ‘exclusive chat’.  You might be in a situationship…  In this episode Dee is joined by guest co-host Ben Ilobuchi to unravel the relationship limbo.    Show notes: Deding and Describing Situationships: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/378872949_Defining_and_Describing_Situationships_An_Exploratory_Investigation  World Health Org: https://www.who.int/news/item/02-09-2025-over-a-billion-people-living-with-mental-health-conditions-services-require-urgent-scale-up    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Have you noticed a pattern in your love life of ending things when a relationship starts to get serious? Or maybe you pick a fight, or ghost people or never commit to a second date. In this ep we chat to psychologist Dr Rebecca Ray about why we can sometimes self-sabotage and how to break that cycle. SHOW NOTES: Dr Rebecca Ray - https://rebeccaray.com.au/   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Whether it’s someone’s personality, physical attributes, career or aesthetic - sometimes we lean into a “type” of person who we’re attracted to and want to date. But can it ever be discriminatory, fetishisation or limiting to potential relationships?  We hear your hot takes and discuss with special guest host Lauren French.

As much as we talk about sex on The Hook Up, for some people they have absolutely no interest in it. That’s what it’s like for writer, fashion girly, podcast host of Booksmart AND asexual baddie Allie Daisy King. In this ep Dee chat’s to Allie about her sexuality journey realising she was ace, what it’s like to live in a world that’s so obsessed with hooking up and dating and why she still loves to read romantasy and smut books.  SHOW NOTES: Allie’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alliedaisyking/?hl=en Extra Virgin: https://www.youtube.com/@alliedaisyking ACE book: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/52128695-ace    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Doing the crossword together every week, writing letters to each other, mandatory date nights, surprise gifts, a commitment to a yearly getaway, and sleeping in separate beds. Whether you’re only a few months in, or years deep - we all have ways to keep the relationship vibes high and healthy. In this ep, we hear your hacks, tricks, rules and methods, to keep your relationship thriving.   SHOW NOTES: Harvard University research on importance of Rituals: https://www.library.hbs.edu/working-knowledge/rituals-strengthen-couples-here-s-why-they-re-good-for-business-too Power of learning new things together: https://www.success.com/the-power-of-learning-new-things-together DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn

Studies show that nearly 30% of Australians have experienced child sexual abuse - a horrific stat that award-winning activist and co-founder of the #YourReferenceAintRelevant campaign - Harrison James has been trying to change.  In this ep, Dee chats to Harri about his activism, his survival of child sexual abuse and what’s helped with healing. As well as what he’s learnt from being in a loving and healthy relationship with his fiance Bella Johnston who actually joins us in the studio too! SHOW NOTES: Lifeline: 13 11 14 1800 RESPECT: 1800 737 732 Harrison James IG: https://www.instagram.com/itsharrijames/?hl=en  Bella Johnston IG: https://www.instagram.com/spicyjohnston/?hl=en Harri’s Book - Transform Your Pain Into Purpose: https://www.simonandschuster.com.au/books/Transform-Your-Pain-into-Purpose/Harrison-James/9781923293892    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Hooking up with your mate’s ex might be one of the biggest violations in a friendship. But is it totally black and white, or are there some grey areas?  We hear your hot takes and stories - from you giving your blessing to friends hiding the relationship, and when pursuing the ex has damaged friendships beyond repair and earnt you the nickname sloppy seconds.   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

When you hear about HIV you might think of the AIDs epidemic during the 80s. But so much has changed since then, including the invention of a prevention drug called PrEP. So how does it work? And is it just for gay men?  In this chat with Professor Andrew Grulich who’s the head of a HIV Epidemiology and Prevention program, we find out everything you need to know about Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis.  SHOW NOTES: Professor Andrew Grulich - https://www.unsw.edu.au/staff/andrew-grulich  https://www.kirby.unsw.edu.au/news/sexually-transmissible-infections-are-rise-australia-syphilis-rates-tripling-over-decade https://www1.racgp.org.au/newsgp/clinical/surge-in-most-stis-over-the-past-10-years https://www.healthline.com/health/healthy-sex/talk-about-prep-hiv-aids#How-do-I-get-PrEP https://napwha.org.au/    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

They say it’s one of the oldest professions in the world, and with sites like OnlyFans booming in popularity, getting into the industry is easier than ever before - but what is it like to date someone who does sex work? We hear your experiences of dating and relationships from the POV of SWers and as partners - from escorts, full service and erotic dancers, to online adult content creators, phone operators and companion services. SHOW NOTES: Melbourne Sexual Health Centre Annual Report: https://www.mshc.org.au/images/downloads/AnnualReports/MSHC_AnnualReport_2024.pdf   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Over 20% of Australians live with a disability yet there’s still so much stigma and misconceptions when it comes to their sex lives. That’s something comedian and host Madeleine Stewart is trying to change in a new doco. We chat about what she’s learnt about desire and pleasure - through her own experience as well as those she interviewed for the show.  SHOW NOTES: Compass episode - Intimate Access: https://iview.abc.net.au/show/compass/series/40/video/RN2511H011S00  Maddie’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/its_madeleine_stewart/ Disability Advocacy Support Helpline: 1800 643 787 Women Disability Australia: https://wwda.org.au/ Touching Base: https://www.touchingbase.org/  DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Did you know psychology has only existed for 147 years? For such a young science, it’s had a huge impact on humanity and how we understand relationships, from Freudian theories to the pop psych infographics we see on social media every day. So we wanted to investigate it - where psychology came from, how it’s evolved throughout time, some of the biggest myths and misconceptions, and what the future of psychology could look like. SHOW NOTES: A Brief History Of Psychology: https://www.verywellmind.com/a-brief-history-of-psychology-through-the-years-2795245 A Brief History of Psychology: From Plato to Pavlov: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_qqwq8EmTY4 Freud’s life work and theories https://www.verywellmind.com/sigmund-freud-his-life-work-and-theories-2795860 The Jungian Shadow: https://www.thesap.org.uk/articles-on-jungian-psychology-2/about-analysis-and-therapy/the-shadow/ Is Stockholm Syndrome A Myth?: https://www.abc.net.au/news/2023-08-23/is-stockholm-syndrome-a-myth/102738084 Myth busting in psychology https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/busting-big-myths/ AI and Psychology https://www.bps.org.uk/psychologist/what-if-we-world-become-too-entrenched-ever-evolving-tech   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Research shows women are out performing men in education, and are buying more houses - but at what cost to their love lives? We speak to author Stefanie O’Connell about her book The Ambition Penalty and her viral Guardian article about how more single women are buying more houses and how men aren’t responding well. SHOW NOTES: Is Your Partner Intimidated By Your Success Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oAHdxsrCrRg Guardian article - https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2026/may/13/women-home-buyers-men-dating  Stefanie O’Connell website - https://tooambitious.com/  The Ambition Penalty - https://tooambitious.com/book/ Stefanie’s Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/stefanieoconnell/?hl=en    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Success looks different for everyone. Maybe you own property, or have built a great career. Maybe you’re highly educated, well travelled, creative, ambitious or wealthy. But sometimes thriving in life can impact dating and relationships. We hear your stories, particularly as women, about when your success has become a problem when dating. SHOW NOTES: Single women are buying more houses. The men they are dating are not responding well: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2026/may/13/women-home-buyers-men-dating   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Saying I love you to someone can be such a huge thing - so how do you know when you actually feel it? And when is the right time to say it? Plus how do you deal when the person you love doesn’t say it back. We answer all your questions about declaring your love with couples therapist Megan Kozak.

These are the most feared words for any budding relationship. I Love You. Everyone's advice is always “just say it when you genuinely feel it!” which is great in theory, but hard in practice for so many reasons. In this episode we chat about the ILY timeframe, why you may or may not say it and how it should be said.    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

73% of you have dated someone where there’s been a mismatch of PDA in your relationship. So what can you do if one of you loves physical touch and the other doesn’t? We chat to couples therapist and sexologist Isiah McKimmie on how to navigate that mismatch, how to deal with feelings of rejection, and whether it’s something you can work on or change.    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

How do you feel about holding hands, hugging, kissing and canoodling in public? Is it cringe or cute? We hear your stories about PDA - witnessing it in the wild, when there’s been a mismatch in physical touch, and whether PDA has been lost.   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

People are emotionally, mentally and spiritually exhausted by dating apps, so much so that hundreds of thousands of swipers are deleting them. Now to try and “shake things up” Bumble is replacing the swipe function with AI matchmaking.  We chat to Dr Raffaele Ciriello from the Uni of Sydney about some of the major issues of using AI to help you date, as well as the benefits. SHOW NOTES: Dr Raffaele Ciriello: https://profiles.sydney.edu.au/raffaele.ciriello  Bumble AI changes: https://www.nytimes.com/2026/05/14/well/bumble-swipe-feature-online-dating-apps.html    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

We’ve all been through puberty. It was sometimes traumatic, mostly awkward, it even had its endearing moments - and going through it shaped the way we think about ourselves and how we show up in the world. In this ep, you share your puberty war stories, and we investigate the mysterious phenomenon called ‘second puberty’. Because, jump scare, it might not be over.  SHOW NOTES: What Happens When You Stop The Pill: https://www.webmd.com/sex/birth-control/stopping-pill-10-ways-body-changes Second puberty https://www.healthline.com/health/second-puberty#summary DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

If you’re LGBTQI+ and live rurally, it can be so hard to explore your sexuality or discover your identity, especially if you don’t have any queer community nearby. In this ep, Dee chats to psychologist Dr Chris Cheers about how to find yourself and your people - if you live in a place that makes it hard to do that.  SHOW NOTES: Lifeline: 13 11 14 QLife: 1800 184 527 Headspace: www.headspace.org.au  Dr Chris Cheers: https://www.chrischeers.com/  DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Dating and relationships out bush is a pretty unique and sometimes challenging experience - everyone knows everyone’s business, you bump into casual hook ups and exes at the local pub, there’s pressure to fit the town culture and pressure to settle down with a partner even if you're incompatible. In this episode, we hear your stories of what it's like dating regional and rural.   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

How you’re feeling emotionally has such an impact on your sex life. It can be hard to feel turned on or connect with people when you’re feeling down, stressed or just numbness from the cooked state of the world. In this ep, Dee chats to sexologist Claire Diaz about how to reconnect to pleasure during hard times.  SHOW NOTES: Claire Diaz: https://www.clairediazsexology.com/  Lifeline: 13 11 14  DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Throughout most of history, marriage wasn’t seen as something you did ‘for love’. We paired up for resources, family alliances and survival - so when did it change? In this episode, we explore the history of romantic love and how it’s changed from ancient love poems and medieval knights, to Shakespeare and modern romcoms.    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

PMDD (aka premenstrual dysphoric disorder)  isn’t ‘just PMS’ - it can be completely debilitating and life changing. In this ep, Dee chats to debut author Emma Hardy about her new book Periodic Bitch and her experience living with it.  Just a heads up we talk about suicidal ideation and depression (if this chat brings up anything please refer to the helplines below. SHOW NOTES: Lifeline - 13 11 14 13YARN - 13 92 76 Beyond Blue - 1300 22 4636 Emma Hardy’s panel at Melbourne Writers Festival: https://mwf.com.au/program/the-next-big-thing#author  PMDD episode with Dr Theresa: https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/pms-pmdd-premenstrual-dysphoric-disorder-help/103909192    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Daniel Foxx thinks you should break up with them over text. And that’s not the only hot take from this week's guest. Fresh off his Australian stand up tour, the UK comedian and podcaster chats the state of dating apps, his furry-fantasies and gives some of his best advice for your dating dilemmas.  instagram: @dnlfoxx website: https://www.danielfoxx.co.uk/ DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

What's the difference between lust, limerence and love? Can love be addictive? Is romantic love technically even real? And if love is so natural to humans then why do we struggle with it? These are just a few of the questions we get answered by world renowned evolutionary anthropologist Dr Anna Machin, an expert whose research focuses on why we love. SHOW NOTES: Your love stories pod ep:  Is Monogamy natural? pod ep: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DmlHf6yvSb4  Where you can find Dr Machin's work: https://annamachin.com/    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

The world is kind of cooked right now, so in the words of our lord and saviour Rihanna, we wanted to find love in a hopeless place. In this ep, you tell us your meet cutes and epic love stories from platonic to romantic and everything in between.   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Over 60% of you said you’ve hooked up with or dated someone you work with! But a lot of the time it can get really messy and end badly. So in this ep, Dee chats to couples therapist Jill Dzadey about how to do it well so you can avoid all the workplace drama.  SHOW NOTES: Hooking Up With Co-Worker Vodcast Ep: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oYcu6rnGSmM Jill Dzadey Website: https://freedomcouplecounselling.com/    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

According to some surveys, over 60% of people have had a workplace romance - which has worked out really well for some, but for others it’s gotten super messy. We hear your stories to find out how you’ve hooked up or dated colleagues, and if it’s worth shitting where you eat.   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

For years women and people with eggs have been told they have a ‘biological clock’ when it comes to their fertility, but how true is that really? And does sperm have the same ‘clock’? In this ep, Dee chats to associate professor Dr Theresa Larkin on the latest research on infertility and why it’s been so gendered.  SHOW NOTES: Yes, men have a biological clock too. But it’s not just age that affects male fertility What’s the difference between sperm and semen? And can pre-ejaculate get you pregnant?   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

triple j's award winning and most complained about show is back for another round of The Hook Up Live at Melbourne International Comedy Festival! Dee and Pip hit the stage with comedians Lou Wall, Fergus Neal, Lara Ricote, Sophie Duker, and Dave Woodhead to hear their most cooked sex and dating stories, play games and give you some personalised advice on your dating dilemmas from the best in the biz* (*us, duh).   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Moving in with a partner is usually considered the ‘next step’. But how do you know when you’re both ready? Because in our last ep we heard it can make or break a relationship. So in this episode we get all the advice you need from couples therapist and sexologist Isiah McKimmie on everything you need to know if you’re thinking about living together.  SHOW NOTES: MOVING IN VODCAST: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OEdz1wajEnM&list=PLFqO_oqoHHMzFwCWPXOj6CDpOdG3eS8cE  Isiah McKimmie Website: https://isiah-mckimmie.com/    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Shacking up with your lover can be so exciting and a real milestone for a relationship, dialling up the intimacy and creating a solid foundation for the future. But sometimes it can reveal parts of a person that you never knew existed - creating tension or sapping the romance out of the relationship, and fast-tracking a break up. We find out how it’s gone for you!  SHOW NOTES: Co-habitation relationship stats in Australia: https://aifs.gov.au/all-research/research-reports/couple-relationships-australia-today DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

She’s ‘Australia’s First Ever Attractive Comedian’ but she’s never been in love before. In this ep, Elouise Eftos chats about the male gaze, female sexuality, heterofatalism, hook up culture and how she feels about never having a serious relationship before.    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

For some of us, being friends with an ex is a sign of emotional maturity. But for others, it’s a warning sign that there might still be feelings, or that it’s an unnecessary (or even disrespectful) relationship to keep. We hear you think and get your advice on how to do it right.    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Ever been mentally turned on but your body isn't responding? Or maybe your body is turned on but your mind isn’t? That's arousal non-concordance, and it's way more common than you think. In this ep, Dee speaks to psychologist and sexologist Laura Lee about why it happens, how it can impact consent and how to handle it. SHOW NOTES: Laura Lee Website - https://www.lauralee.com.au/  DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Do you think humans are biologically wired for one partner? Or have we been socially conditioned into monogamy? We deep dive into the science and history of human relationships to figure out whether pairing with one person for life is our natural state of being, or if we’re actually biologically predisposed to be non-monogamous. SHOW NOTES: Our biology wants us untethered. So why does society place so much emphasis on monogamy?: https://www.latimes.com/opinion/op-ed/la-oe-barash-why-humans-choose-monogamy-20160320-story.html   Monogamous Animal Study - where humans rank: https://www.theguardian.com/science/2025/dec/10/humans-rank-among-leading-monogamous-mammals-study-finds   PODCAST: Science Vs - True Love: Is Monogamy Unnatural?  https://open.spotify.com/episode/1gm9BvCWsHhXN2erbvNXiv   PODCAST: Lives Well Lived w/ Anna Machin: Monogamy Is Unnatural https://open.spotify.com/episode/3WyhifKm70RhzlLUChN8S3   BOOK: Esther Perel - Mating In Captivity   BOOK: Sex At Dawn - Christopher Ryan and Cacilda Jethá   BOOK: Eve: How the Female Body Drove 200 Million Years of Human Evolution - Cat Bohannon  VIDEO: Helen Fisher + Chris Ryan + Esther Perel https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jMji-YE1qVA   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Louis Theroux’s new Netflix doco Inside the Manosphere has everyone talking. So in this episode, Dee chats with men’s violence prevention advocate and educator Tarang Chawla about his reaction to the film, why so many young men and boys are drawn to manosphere influencers, and the real-world impacts this content is having. SHOW NOTES: Inside The Manosphere - https://www.netflix.com/au/title/81920687  Tarang Chawla - https://tarangchawla.com/  1800 Respect (1800 737 732): national domestic family and sexual violence counselling hotline. Mensline Australia (1300 78 99 78): counselling support for men with concerns about mental health, relationships, anger management, family violence (using and experiencing), stress, and suicidal thoughts. 13YARN (13 92 76): 24/7 culturally safe crisis support for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people. Beyond Blue (1300 22 4636): 24/7 support for anxiety and depression.   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Sometimes our mates do or say things that are a turn off - but unlike a relationship, sometimes we let them slide. In this episode we find out your friendship icks, and debate whether we should hold friends to the same standard that we hold our relationships to.   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Is Having A Boyfriend Embarrassing Now? When writer Chanté Joseph asked that question in Vogue last year, she broke the internet. It pissed a lot of people off, but it also made a lot of single women finally feel validated. So why did it strike such a nerve? Dee Salmin asks Chanté what she really meant, what she thinks about heterosexuality in 2026, and whether engagements and marriage are embarrassing too.  SHOW NOTES: Is Having A Boyfriend Embarrassing Now? Article: https://www.vogue.com/article/is-having-a-boyfriend-embarrassing-now    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

If you really want (or don’t want) kids, what do you do if you’re dating or in a relationship with someone who doesn’t feel the same way? It can be one of the hardest things to navigate, so in this episode – you’ll hear from relationship coach Megan Luscombe on how to figure out if it’s a dealbreaker or if it’s something you can work through.    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Whether you’re on a first date, or deep into a relationship, a dealbreaker can come out of nowhere and really change the way you feel about someone. We find out what yours are, when you’ve ended relationships over them and if you (or a partner) have compromised or changed for a dealbreaker.   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Like we heard in last week’s ep, miscarriages are so common, yet so many people feel alone in their experience. So in this ep, you’ll hear from author Jess Kirkness again - sharing the emotional impact her pregnancy loss had on her, as well as from Miscarriage Australia’s Dr Jade Bilardi and clinical psychologist Clare Bellhouse on how to heal and best support your loved ones. SHOW NOTES: Jess Kirkness Article - https://www.abc.net.au/news/2026-02-21/miscarriage-loss-grief/106308830 Miscarriage Australia - https://miscarriageaustralia.com.au/  Red Nose Grief and Loss Support Line (1300 308 307): 24/7 support for anyone impacted by miscarriage, stillbirth, or baby death. Pink Elephants Pregnancy Loss Helpline (1300 726 306): Support via PANDA, available Mon-Fri 9am-7:30pm, Sat 9am-4pm AEST. 13YARN (13 92 76): 24/7 culturally safe crisis support for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people. Beyond Blue (1300 22 4636): 24/7 support for anxiety and depression.   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

They say don’t judge a book by its cover - but does that mean you should always “give them a chance” if you’re not immediately attracted to someone? In this episode we’re debating whether attraction needs to be instant or can grow over time, are we stringing people along if we wait for it to develop, and have dating apps have killed slowburn romance. SHOW NOTES: Romantic attraction and evolution: New study pinpoints key traits in mate selection: https://www.psypost.org/romantic-attraction-and-evolution-new-study-pinpoints-key-traits-in-mate-selection/ The Preferred Traits of Mates in a Cross-National Study of Heterosexual and Homosexual Men and Women: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/6427708_The_Preferred_Traits_of_Mates_in_a_Cross-National_Study_of_Heterosexual_and_Homosexual_Men_and_Women_An_Examination_of_Biological_and_Cultural_Influences OUR EP: Unpacking Adolescence, The Manosphere and The 80/20 Rule https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/unpacking-adolescence-the-manosphere-and-the-80-20-rule/105118516 DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Miscarriages and pregnancy loss are so much more common than we might think. But no one really talks about them?! In this ep you’ll hear from Jess Kirkness, a writer who shares her miscarriage story, plus you’ll also hear from gynaecologist Dr Charlotte Elder on why they happen and what to expect.    SHOW NOTES: Jess Kirkness Article - https://www.abc.net.au/news/2026-02-21/miscarriage-loss-grief/106308830 Red Nose Grief and Loss Support Line (1300 308 307): 24/7 support for anyone impacted by miscarriage, stillbirth, or baby death. Pink Elephants Pregnancy Loss Helpline (1300 726 306): Support via PANDA, available Mon-Fri 9am-7:30pm, Sat 9am-4pm AEST. 13YARN (13 92 76): 24/7 culturally safe crisis support for Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander people. Beyond Blue (1300 22 4636): 24/7 support for anxiety and depression.   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Everyone knows about the “3 date rule”, but is it always worth the wait? We find out why you’re holding off sex or diving right in, if there’s a magic number of dates before getting intimate and whether having sex too soon can stop a relationship in it’s tracks. SHOW NOTES: YouGov Survey on how long you should wait before having sex: https://today.yougov.com/society/articles/37341-relationships-dating-marriage-sex-milestones-poll?utm_source=chatgpt.com   Studies on first-date sex impacting relationships: https://www.datingadvice.com/studies/fdshlt https://www.mamamia.com.au/sex-on-first-date/   Differing relationship outcomes when sex happens before, on, or after first dates https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/23121225/   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

When we asked what kind of porn you're into, so many of you told us you love piss play. We chat to sexologist and psychologist Laura Lee on this seemingly common kink/fetish, why it's so hot for some and how to do it well. SHOW NOTES: Laura Lee Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/lauraleesexology/?hl=en    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

We’ve all been audiences to celebrity splits where dirty laundry gets aired out through podcast tell-all’s, tiktok sprays and album drops - but what about when it happens closer to home? We explore the aftermath of a break up and hear your stories of when you’ve gone public, from openly grieving to spilling secrets, to when you’ve been put on blast by an ex and had the truth twisted.    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

What does the kinda porn you’re into mean? Is it just a fantasy or is it deeper than that? And how do you deal with feelings of shame and guilt if what you like to get off to, doesn’t align with who you are in your everyday life.  In this ep, Dee chats to sexologist Lauren French about what your porn taste says about you.  SHOW NOTES: Lifeline: 13 11 14 1800 RESPECT: 1800 737 732  MensLine Australia: 1300 78 99 78  Qlife (Queer support services): 1800 184 527 Pornaddiction.com: PornAddiction.com  Sex Addiction Australia: https://www.sexaddictionaustralia.com.au/ RELATED EPISODES: What Kind Of Porn Are You Into?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWABwwal8II&list=PLFqO_oqoHHMzFwCWPXOj6CDpOdG3eS8cE&index=1    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Sometimes what turns you on can throw you for a loop. Maybe you’re straight but love gay porn? Or maybe you consider yourself a staunch feminist, but you get off watching gangbangs or reading CNC smut books? In this episode we find out all the different types of porn you’re loving, and whether your taste in porn aligns with your sexuality, gender and politics. *Content warning* - In this ep we discuss genres of porn that might be confronting to some. We'll be asking follow up questions in our next ep with an expert. DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Heated Rivalry is one of the hottest, most popular shows right now. So what is it about Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov that's got so many gay men AND women obsessed?  We unpack the Canadian 8 episode HBO series with comedian, and host of The Mitch Churi Show, Mitch Churi - and hear why this series has become a cultural turning point for queer love stories. SHOW NOTES: The Mitch Churi Chat Show: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UClC22mpuIS85Tj_-U-ENqpg   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

It sounds great on paper - a friend who you have no-strings-attached, drama free sex with. But is it really possible, and is it worth trying? We hear your experiences with FWB relationships - from when they’ve worked to when they’ve crashed and burned - and your rules to make a successful friends with benefits.   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Is your partner a massive scroller? Always on their phone for work? Obsessed with watching videos? Being on your phone too much in a relationship can massively impact your connection and intimacy.  It’s something professor Dr Michelle Drouin has been studying for years. In this ep, she chats to Dee about her research and how you can chill out on the phone use in your relos.  SHOW NOTES: Dee and Pip vodcast episode: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dU_nIC10ptg  Dr Michelle Drouin - professor of psychology at Purdue University Fort Wayne and research scientist at Parkview Health: https://www.drmichelledrouin.com/  Book: Out Of Touch - How To Survive An Intimacy Famine      DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Nearly 70% of you reckon that phones are causing problems in your relationships. From etiquette and icks in early dating, to feeling distant and causing tension with your long term partners - we explore how they’re impacting our love lives, whether they can create intimacy and your rules to curb your “smartphone addiction” (if that’s even a real thing). SHOW NOTES: Phone Addiction: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/ng-interactive/2024/jan/03/what-is-phone-addiction-definition-science-debate   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

We're back!!! Dee and Pip yap about their summers. Guess who was sick and who partied non stop. They also debrief Heated Rivalry and let you know what's coming up this year with The Hook Up.   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

ICYMI: Whether it’s for friendship, therapy or sexual and romantic relationships, AI companions are becoming way more normalised. So what does this mean for the way we relate and date people irl? We investigate the rise of AI relationships and hear how you’re using it in your own love lives. CW: discussion of mental health and suicide SHOW NOTES: Mental health and AI companions https://www.abc.net.au/news/2025-01-07/ai-chatbot-husbando-waifu-relationships-romance-psychology/104701556 Reddit - My Husband Wants To Open Our Marriage To His AI Girlfriend https://www.reddit.com/r/AmIOverreacting/comments/1ltm60b/aio_my_35f_husband_36m_wants_to_open_our_marriage/ Can ChatBots Substitute Real Human Romance? https://theconversation.com/computer-love-ai-powered-chatbots-are-changing-how-we-understand-romantic-and-sexual-well-being-234054 NY Times podcast - She Fell In Love With ChatGPT https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0tXmc_cYW9Y 14 Year Old Boy Takes His Life After AI Chatbot Encourages Him https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2024/oct/23/character-ai-chatbot-sewell-setzer-death AI Companion inciting Sexual violence, abuse, terror attacks https://theconversation.com/an-ai-companion-chatbot-is-inciting-self-harm-sexual-violence-and-terror-attacks-252625   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

ICYMI: If you’re not feeling great mentally, or you want to work through some things, or you’ve just gone through a big life event - you might be thinking about getting some professional help.  Starting therapy can feel super overwhelming if you’ve never done it before, so in this ep we chat to clinical psychologist Dr Jarrod White about everything you need to know about going to therapy for the first time.  SHOW NOTES: Dr Jarrod White - Beyond Therapy Room   The Body Keeps The Score - Bessel Van Der Kolk  The Courage To Be Disliked - Ichiro Kishimi, Fumitake Koga  Lost Connections - Johann Hari   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Keen to have a threesome for the first time but duno how to go about it? Dee chats to sexologist Laura Lee about all the different ways you can have a threeway.  SHOW NOTES: How Are You Having Threesomes? VOD: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7El-yUPxPMw&t=3s   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

So you wanna get back with your ex. It’s a pretty universal experience and you told us heaps of reasons why you tried to rekindle the relationship - whether it’s emotional dependency, needing closure or the whole “it’ll be different this time!”. We hear your stories from when it’s worked, when it hasn’t, and if there’s a formula to getting it right.  SHOW NOTES: Should You Get Back With Your Ex or Move On?: https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/getting-back-together-with-ex-break-up-move-on-liz-neal/105749268   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Have you ever dated someone who's family was too involved, or a bit too close? Whether it’s your own or your partners - we hear how families with no boundaries, cultural/religious differences, and mummy’s boys/daddy’s girls have messed with your love life. SHOW NOTES: An Expert’s Advice For Dealing With Toxic Families: https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/families-no-boundaries-toxic-relationships-dr-lillian-nejad/105154746   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

We’re coming to the end of a massive year covering all things love, sex, dating and relationships here on The Hook Up. From the male loneliness epidemic and the rise of AI relationships, to the rise of ENM, performative males, fake doms and boyfriends being embarrassing - we recap all the trends in news and pop culture that got you talking, plus hear your fav eps from 2025! SHOW NOTES: Hack story on AI Relationship study on relationships https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/hack/ai-chatbots-accelerating-loneliness-epidemic/105931188 Is Being A Pick Me Or Performative Male Problematic? https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/is-being-a-pick-me-or-performative-male-problematic-/105889546 How To Actually Have A Good Threesome https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/how-to-have-a-threesome-tips-sexologist-find-unicorn-third-sex/105315188 Do I Have A Sex/Porn Addiction? https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/sex-porn-addiction-sex-addict-heide-mcconkey-compulsive-sexual-/105895896 How Often Should I Be Having Sex? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQ35yOTAfyo&list=PLFqO_oqoHHMzFwCWPXOj6CDpOdG3eS8cE&index=9 How To Deal With Mismatched Libido https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/mismatched-libidos-different-low-sex-drives-laura-lee-sexologist/105812842 Is Everyone ENM Now? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9L7gf5TR5Q How To Do Non-Monogamy Ethically https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/open-up-relationship-ethical-non-monogamy-chris-cheers-polyamory/105506070 Why Are There So Many Fake Doms? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ngg8KHqrSgo Period Farts, Cum Headaches & The Science Of Kinks w/ Dr Eva https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/science-week-sex-questions-fertility-periods-orgasms-libido-kink/105616942 Science Of Squirting And How To Do It https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/science-squirting-orgasm-ejaculation-how-to-squirt/105643192   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

If your friend is dating someone that sucks, or is downright toxic - what’s the best way to let them know? In this ep, you’ll hear from psychologist Liz Neal about how to tell someone you love that you don’t like their partner and what to do if your friend pushes you away.   SHOW NOTES: 1800 Respect: 1800 737 732  Liz Neal Website: https://www.elizabethneal.com.au/ DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

We’ve all had a friend who’s dated someone you don’t like - but is it ever your place to say something? We find out whether you should tell them (early? When you’re asked? Or not at all??), find the difference between not liking their partner vs they’re bad for your friend and why you reckon it’s important to stick around even if your friend's got rose coloured glasses on. SHOW NOTES: Lifeline: 13 11 14 1800 RESPECT: 1800 737 732    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Sex toys are an amazing way to explore pleasure and discover your sexuality - but there’s still a lot of stigma, especially when bringing them into partnered sex or if you struggle to climax without one. We chat to sex educator Georgia Grace about how to work through any internalised toy shame, and how to introduce them if you (or your partner) feel awkward. Note: we experienced some technical issues during this recording which have impacted audio quality, but feel the chat too good not to share! DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Sex toys have become more accessible and normalised than ever before, but are they making your love life better? From vibrators, dildos and fleshlights to floggers, whips and gags, we hear how you’re using them with partners, we unpack vibrator shame, and discuss how the sexual wellness trend is packaging products and pleasure. SHOW NOTES: Men are buying more sex toys: https://www.bodyandsoul.com.au/relationships/sex/men-are-now-buying-more-sex-toys-than-women/image-gallery/765abe10019cb43713c9f7cfcd75adf0 Sexual wellness industry stats: https://www.fortunebusinessinsights.com/sexual-wellness-products-market-110030 DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Some people say one of the most important decisions you’ll make is the person you choose to marry. So how can you make sure you’re ready to tie the knot, and that they’re the partner for you? We chat to couples therapist Isiah McKimmie to find out the ‘must ask’ questions - you should be asking yourself and each other.  SHOW NOTES: Isiah McKimmie Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/isiahmckimmie.sexologist/?hl=en  Isiah McKimmie Details: https://isiah-mckimmie.com/  DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

It’s been a year of engagements and tying the knot for some of the biggest pop stars in the world, like Charli XCX, Lana Del Ray, Dua Lipa and Taylor Swift. And despite it being one of the oldest and most traditional ways to commit to a partner - research shows young people are more keen on getting wed than the generation before us. We hear how you feel about marriage, and whether it’s something you still wanna do.

Actor Zoe Terakes (Talk To Me, Nine Perfect Strangers, Marvel’s Ironheart) is reclaiming Ancient Greek mythology in their debut novel Eros: Queer Myths For Lovers. In this episode, Zoe chats with Dee about why so many of the iconic Greek myths - from Zeus and Aphrodite to Icarus and Hermaphroditus - are really stories of queer and trans life, lust, sex, and revenge. And why it’s so important to reclaim these tales that celebrate all types of love and bodies.  SHOW NOTES: Zoe Terakes Insta: https://www.instagram.com/zoeterakes/?hl=en  Eros: Queer Myths For Lovers: https://www.hachette.com.au/zoe-terakes/eros-queer-myths-for-lovers    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Have you ever been in a relationship where your partner starts to feel less romantic, more platonic, or even like your flatmate? You might have experienced roommate syndrome. In this episode with special cohost Jordan Barr, we work out the telltale the signs of a roomie phase, unpack the reasons why it happens and debate whether we should be reframing our expectations of long term relationships. SHOW NOTES: How to get the spark back in your relationship:  https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/how-to-get-intimacy-back-in-your-relationship-emotional-spark/104535358  Has social media cooked our expectations of dating?  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rilv_GuNQD4 Should your partner be your best friend? https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/should-your-partner-be-best-friend-soulmate-relationship/104132010 DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

We chat to award winning radio journalist and author Stephanie Foo about her memoir What My Bones Know, exploring her diagnosis with C-PTSD – unpacking how and why it manifested for her, understanding intergenerational trauma, and how she’s learning to heal. SHOW NOTES: Lifeline: 13 11 14 Beyond Blue: 1300 22 4636 13 Yarn: 13 92 76 Headspace: https://headspace.org.au/  Cherry Blossom Intergenerational Trauma Study: https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3923835/  DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Height is something you (mostly) can’t change, and yet it’s one of the most contentious dating preferences - we’re lying about it on the apps, rejecting lovers if they don’t measure up and even turning it into a full-blown personality trait. In this episode with special cohost Blake Pavey, we’re unpacking how height is affecting your love life, where this tall tale of height superiority is coming from and whether it’s as big a dealbreaker as society would like us to think.   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Do you find sexting, nudes and filming with a partner hot - but don’t know how to initiate, manage consent, deal with body confidence and understand the risks? We get advice and practical tips from sex educator Georgia Grace on how to get intimate online in a safe and sexy way.  SHOW NOTES: Helplines: Lifeline - 13 11 14  1800 RESPECT More information on image-based abuse: https://www.esafety.gov.au/ DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

While you might not have reached chronic levels of being online, it’s fair to say we’re living through a screen more than ever before - so how are you doing sex and intimacy in the digital age? We find out how you feel about sexting, sending nudes and making content with your partners - and how you’re managing your digital footprint when image based abuse is on the rise. SHOW NOTES: Helplines: Lifeline - 13 11 14  1800 RESPECT More information on image-based abuse: https://www.esafety.gov.au/   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

If you’re over-analysing texts, constantly questioning if your partner loves you, dwelling on their past relationships while also worrying if they’re ‘the one’ for your future - then this episode is for you. We get some expert advice from sex and relationship therapist Lauren Bradley on how to deal with overthinking in dating and relationships, how to know if you're doing it a healthy or harmful amount and how to break the anxiety pattern if it’s ruining your love life.   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Whether it’s casual dating or locked in long term relationships, 80% of you told us that you overthink everything. We find out what that looks like for you, from chronically overthinking every text, tone of voice, needing constant reassurance and spiralling about the future - and how this kind of anxiety is affecting your love life.    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

What’s the difference between having a high sex drive, watching a lot of porn, and having an addiction to sex? That’s something we find out in this episode with sex therapist Heide McConkey who’s spent nearly 30 years working with people who have Compulsive Sexual Behavior Disorder.  SHOW NOTES: Sex Addiction Australia: https://www.sexaddictionaustralia.com.au/ Sex Addiction Anonymous: https://saa-recovery.org/ Lifeline: 13 11 14   RELATED EPISODES: How Often Are You Having Sex?: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQ35yOTAfyo&t=491s How To Deal With Mismatched Libidos: https://www.abc.net.au/triplej/programs/the-hook-up/mismatched-libidos-different-low-sex-drives-laura-lee-sexologist/105812842    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Ever been called a ‘pick me’? It’s been a cultural buzzword for years to describe women who seek male validation by putting down other women - but have we taken the term too far? We find out what it actually means to be a ‘pick me’, why it’s a problematic label to hand out without critical thought, and explore whether the ‘performative male’ is the guy version that needs just as much scrutiny. SHOW NOTES:  Pick-me girl backlash exposes a bigger issue: https://www.who.com.au/lifestyle/sex-relationships/pick-me-girl/ DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Your pelvic floor muscles are connected to way more than you might think - like UTIs, constipation, painful sex, orgasms, even peeing when you laugh. In this episode, pelvic floor physio Chloe Peters helps us get to know this underrated group of muscles, answers all your juicy questions about vaginismus, endo, and bladder stuff, and shares super practical tips for looking after it. SHOW NOTES: Chloe Cox - pelvic floor physiotherapist @chloe_thepelvicphysio      DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

The idea of a soulmate might sound like a fairytale, but plenty of people still believe in finding that perfect match. In this episode we dive into your soulmate stories - from romantic to platonic - and ask the big questions: can you have more than one? Do soulmates happen by fate, or are they made over time?   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Ex-AFL player and author Brandon Jack tackles the peer pressure guys feel to fit in and some of the problematic ways men perform masculinity in their friendships - in his new book Pissants. In this ep, he chats to Dee Salmin about the novel, the ‘male loneliness epidemic’ and how guys can create more vulnerable and meaningful relationships with each other. RELATED EPISODES: Is The ‘Male Loneliness Epidemic’ Real? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5ZI_bOTFHXE  SHOW NOTES: Pissants - https://www.simonandschuster.com.au/books/Pissants/Brandon-Jack/9781761633072  Micheal Kimmel research ‘Masculinity As Homophobia’: https://psycnet.apa.org/record/1997-97379-006    DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

The conversation around men feeling lonely has become a lightning rod for social, political and cultural weigh-ins by everyone - but how do guys actually feel about their loneliness? We asked you to cut through the noise to give your honest experiences of loneliness and male friendship, and we investigate the research to find out if this can even be called an ‘epidemic’.  Mensline Australia: 1300 789 978 Lifeline: 13 11 14  SHOW NOTES: The State Of Loneliness 2023 data https://www.campaigntoendloneliness.org/press-release/half-a-million-more-people-are-lonely-all-or-most-of-the-time/   Social Isolation And Loneliness in Australia https://www.aihw.gov.au/mental-health/topic-areas/health-wellbeing/social-isolation-and-loneliness   ‘An uphill battle’: why are men struggling to make – and keep – friends? https://www.theguardian.com/wellness/ng-interactive/2025/jul/10/male-friendships-midlife#:~:text=According%20to%20data%20from%20the%20Survey%20Center,in%202021%2C%20compared%20with%203%25%20in%201990.   Male loneliness and isolation: What the data shows https://aibm.org/research/male-loneliness-and-isolation-what-the-data-shows/   The surprising truth about loneliness in America https://www.vox.com/even-better/366620/loneliness-epidemic-coping-demographics-america-social-connection-mental-health   Side talk: Half of men feel more comfortable having difficult conversations shoulder-to-shoulder https://www.greeneking.co.uk/newsroom/shoulder-to-shoulder?utm_source=chatgpt.com   Is Male Loneliness an Epidemic? A Gendered and Structural Reframing https://static1.squarespace.com/static/67e9bb2b8ad1d04967a0459c/t/68abcf2e684fb76f348bc0c0/1756090158503/Is+male+loneliness+an+epidemic.pdf   The men's loneliness epidemic might not exist https://www.npr.org/2025/02/17/1263527043/its-been-a-minute-male-loneliness-epidemic-real   Vulga Drawings instagram: https://www.instagram.com/p/DFVr4eXopWw/?img_index=1   Females were more likely to have mental health conditions https://www.americashealthrankings.org/learn/reports/mental-and-behavioral-health-data-brief/key-findings-gender?utm_source=chatgpt.com   Theorizing Mankeeping: The Male Friendship Recession and Women’s Associated Labor as a Structural Component of Gender Inequality https://www.researchgate.net/publication/385006823_Theorizing_Mankeeping_The_Male_Friendship_Recession_and_Women's_Associated_Labor_as_a_Structural_Component_of_Gender_Inequality   Men value romantic relationships more and suffer greater consequences from breakups than women https://www.psypost.org/men-value-romantic-relationships-more-and-suffer-greater-consequences-from-breakups-than-women/?utm_source=chatgpt.com DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Have you got a different sex drive to your partner? When your libido is out of sync, you can feel guilt, shame and rejection, making you question if your relationship is compatible. We get advice from sexologist and psychologist Laura Lee on how to work through those feelings and how to find a balance.  SHOW NOTES: How Often Should You Have Sex? Vodcast DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

Everyone’s got a number in mind but whether you’re hitting that goal is a different story. From hormones and medication to the mental load and mismatched libidos, we find out the factors that affect how much sex you’re having - and if there’s a magic number. SHOW NOTES: Don’t Blame Women For Low Libido, Sparks Fly When Partners Do Their Share Of Chores: https://theconversation.com/dont-blame-women-for-low-libido-sexual-sparks-fly-when-partners-do-their-share-of-chores-including-calling-the-plumber-185401 Is a Man's Sex Drive Really Much Stronger Than a Woman's? https://www.cosmopolitan.com/sex-love/a64059036/unsupportive-partners-stress-sex-drive/ Sex Drive: How Do Men and Women Compare? https://www.webmd.com/sex/features/sex-drive-how-do-men-women-compare Is a Man's Sex Drive Really Much Stronger Than a Woman's? https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/talking-apes/202212/do-men-really-have-stronger-sex-drives-than-women DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.

If you have irregular periods, excess body hair, acne, weight gain and are struggling to get pregnant, you might have polycystic ovarian syndrome. PCOS is a chronic hormonal condition that impacts around one in ten people with ovaries, but many people go undiagnosed and it’s the leading cause of infertility. In this episode, we find out signs to look for, and how you can treat it.   DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is recorded on the lands of the Wurundjeri people of the Kulin nation. We pay our respects to elders past and present. We acknowledge Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples as the First Australians and Traditional Custodians of the land where we live, work, and learn.